The Rain of emotion

by lyshasra88

Summary:

What could they possible argue about?
.
.

“Need?” He laughed again, bitterly this time. “You say you need him but you left him alone in the mountains once, Xichen. He could have died while you were too busy saving someone else. I sacrificed everything to make sure he saw this world safely… and you just—”

 

He stopped himself, shaking. His tears finally fell, hot and silent.

“You should find the meaning of being a father before you claim to have a family.”

Lan Xichen was known to be calm, kind, and endlessly patient. To the world, he was the perfect Sect Leader — someone who carried others’ burdens quietly, someone who smiled through storms and pain alike. But Nie Mingjue had always seen past the gentleness, to the man who felt too much.

Lan Xichen’s heart was vast, perhaps too vast..always caring, always trying to fix, to protect, to understand.

At first, Nie Mingjue had loved him for that.

But over time… it began to hurt.

It began with the Jiang family,their losses, their struggles. Nie Mingjue understood that compassion. He even admired it. But when Lan Xichen began traveling to Yunmeng every month in the name of “Sect Leader duties,” something inside Nie Mingjue began to ache. Each trip stretched longer, each letter shorter.

At home, their son Lan Jingyi would tug on Nie Mingjue’s robes, asking,

“When will Father come home?”

 

Nie Mingjue had no answer. He would lift the boy up and say softly,

“Soon. He’ll come soon.”

 

But even he stopped believing those words after a while.

 

---

When Lan Xichen finally returned, Nie Mingjue was often already gone.Managing his sect, training disciples, pretending the distance didn’t wound him. They saw each other less as husbands, and more as leaders exchanging courtesies.

And then came Jin Guangyao.

Nie Mingjue had warned him, pleaded even, to stay cautious. He had seen things,things that proved Jin Guangyao’s deceit. But Lan Xichen… he refused to listen.

“He saved my life once, Mingjue. Whatever else he has done, I cannot ignore that debt.”

 

Nie Mingjue’s eyes darkened.

“And what about what he’s done to others? Does that not count?”

 

Lan Xichen said nothing..only silence, only that soft calm that felt like a blade to Nie Mingjue’s heart.

That night, Nie Mingjue sat in the courtyard of Gusu, watching the candles burn low. He thought of all the years he had stood beside Lan Xichen.. as husband, as protector, as the one who bore their child and their future. And yet, he felt like a ghost in his own home.

When Lan Xichen returned late that night from another meeting,his robes still carrying traces of the Jin Sect’s gold — Nie Mingjue finally broke.

 

---

“Enough,” Nie Mingjue said quietly, voice trembling with anger too deep to scream. “It’s enough, Lan Xichen. There’s nothing left to fix. I put the blame on myself,for stealing your moments, for believing this marriage was something you wanted.”

 

Lan Xichen’s breath caught.

“Mingjue, don’t—”

 

“I know,” Nie Mingjue cut in, his tone raw, cracking. “I know you care for everyone, but do you even see me anymore? You fight for everyone — Jiang Cheng, Jin Guangyao, the world but never for us. Never for me.”

 

Lan Xichen stepped forward, eyes wide, reaching out. “You’re wrong. I do—”

Nie Mingjue pulled away, his voice breaking like glass.

“I’m just the spouse you never needed to have. This was all arranged, remember? You got what you wanted peace, unity, duty. And I got…”

 

He laughed, but the sound was hollow.

“I got left behind.”

 

He turned, walking toward their son’s room. Lan Xichen followed, voice trembling, “Please, don’t go. I need you. I need him. Don’t take Jingyi away from me.”

Nie Mingjue froze by the doorway, looking at their sleeping boy,small hands clutching his little rabbit toy. His voice dropped to a whisper.

“Need?” He laughed again, bitterly this time. “You say you need him but you left him alone in the mountains once, Xichen. He could have died while you were too busy saving someone else. I sacrificed everything to make sure he saw this world safely… and you just—”

 

He stopped himself, shaking. His tears finally fell, hot and silent.

“You should find the meaning of being a father before you claim to have a family.”

 

And then he left.

Lan Xichen stood there in the dark hallway, his hand still reaching out...empty, trembling, useless. The wind outside carried the chill of Gusu’s night air through the paper screens.

Nie Mingjue’s footsteps faded, carrying away the warmth of the home they once shared.

Lan Xichen sank to his knees, unable to breathe past the silence. The candles flickered, their light dying one by one.

All that was left was the sound of a heart breaking
,softly, quietly, as it always had.

----

The years had passed like wind through bamboo..quiet, unrelenting, leaving nothing untouched.

Lan Xichen had changed. The light in his eyes had dimmed, replaced by a tired calm that no longer fooled anyone who looked closely. The once effortless grace of Gusu Lan’s Sect Leader was now a mask of restraint .His every word measured, his every smile faint and weary.

Nie Mingjue had changed too, though in a different way. The fire in him had not gone out..it had simply turned cold, distant. His hair was longer, his shoulders broader, his expression unreadable. When he walked into the main hall of the Sect Conference, the air shifted, quiet, tense, aware of the history that followed him.

And then, there was Lan Xichen, standing across the room.

For a moment, the world stood still.

No one dared to breathe as the two men — once the most admired couple among the sects.. faced each other again for the first time in years.

Nie Mingjue’s gaze was steady, fixed on the stage ahead. He did not look at Lan Xichen, not even once. But Lan Xichen’s eyes ,they couldn’t look away.

He wanted to speak, to say anything but an apology, a greeting, a whisper of the past but his lips refused to move.

At his side, a small hand tugged at his robes.

“Father!”

 

Lan Jingyi’s voice broke the silence like a bell. The boy had grown taller, though still small compared to the hall full of adults. His wide eyes searched the crowd, his voice clear, innocent, and full of longing.

“Father! You forgot your jade pin again!”

 

The way he said father so bright, so unashamed that's made Lan Xichen’s throat tighten. To him, that single word meant everything.

Lan Jingyi ran toward Nie Mingjue, holding out the jade pin with both hands. Nie Mingjue turned at last,not to Lan Xichen, but to his son. His face softened just a fraction. He took the pin, murmured,

“You’ve grown taller.”

 

It was barely a whisper, but Lan Xichen heard it, felt it, and it tore through him like rain through silk.

Around them, whispers stirred.

Wei Wuxian leaned toward Jiang Cheng, voice hushed but clearly audible to half the hall,

“Are they fighting? Is there, like… a divorce file or something?”

 

Jiang Cheng’s eyes darted between them.

“Does Gusu even allow divorce?”

 

Wei Wuxian turned to Lan Wangji, half-grinning.

“Lan Zhan, you’d know. Did something happen between your brother and Nie-zongzhu?”

 

Lan Wangji’s expression didn’t change. His answer was quiet,almost mournful.

“Mn. Xiaozhang locked himself in for three nights after it happened. It was raining then too.”

 

Wei Wuxian blinked.

“Rain?”

 

“Rain of emotion,” Lan Wangji said softly.

 

And the hall fell quiet again.

 

---

The conference ended hours later, with formalities none of them cared for. As people dispersed, Lan Xichen stood frozen near the steps, unsure whether to go or to stay. He wanted to speak, to say something that would mend the years between them — but he didn’t know where to start.

Nie Mingjue walked past him, Lan Jingyi trotting behind. Lan Xichen reached out instinctively, his hand trembling. His fingers caught Nie Mingjue’s sleeve a gentle tug, desperate yet silent.

The whole courtyard froze again.

Nie Mingjue stopped, staring down at the hand on his arm. The gesture was small but to him, it carried the weight of every unspoken word, every sleepless night, every broken promise.

He didn’t move for a long while. Then, with a quiet click of his tongue.. frustration or pain, no one could tell — he rubbed off the hand as though it burned. His voice came out low, rough, not quite steady.

“Don’t do that. Not here.”

 

Lan Xichen’s hand fell, trembling slightly. His gaze lowered, shame and longing written across his face for all to see. Around them, the other sect leaders pretended not to watch but everyone did.

Nie Mingjue sighed, heavy and tired. He looked at Lan Jingyi,the boy now holding onto Lan Xichen’s sleeve in confusion and finally said, voice gravelly but not cruel,

“I’ll follow you to Gusu… if you wanted to talk.”

 

It wasn’t a question. It wasn’t even mercy.

It was understanding — silent and raw.

Nie Mingjue already knew what Lan Xichen wanted. He could see it in the man’s eyes, the same eyes that once smiled at him under moonlight, the same eyes that now shimmered with tears he refused to let fall.

Lan Xichen nodded faintly, his voice barely more than breath.

“Thank you.”

 

Nie Mingjue said nothing more. He simply turned away, guiding Lan Jingyi ahead with one large hand on his son’s shoulder.

And as Lan Xichen watched them go, the first drops of rain began to fall again.. soft, cold, endless.

Just like that night.

The rain of emotion had returned.