Chapter Text
A new voice cut through the office today, more gruff than your typical dispatcher but not strong enough to carry across the office. A new voice from that same desk where 8 people have sat in the past week, all recruited by HR and going through rapid-fire interviews before quitting or being moved across branches. Apparently this guy was supposed to be different, hired by Blazer herself. Most people in the branch already had bets between coworkers after watching him walk in through those doors; there was nothing remarkable about him, with most people not even bothering to see the new face. But one thing was consistent with the talks.
A man with no powers – yeah, he won't be here long.
Not with this fuck-up of a team.
If you would even call them a team, not a bunch of misfits that are somehow more dysfunctional than actual villains.
_ _ _
However, saying all that, he got through the first shift; they somewhat listened to him. I mean, I have never seen a dispatcher end up with a bleeding nose after not leaving the office. Although, there he was, blood running down his face in the break room, stuffing his nose with a bit of tissue, walking across the office, his face hard to read. I couldn't tell if he was pissed or just tired, probably both after hearing his voice all shift, not that I wanted to; he was just really fucking loud.
Something is bugging me, though. I feel like I recognise his face from somewhere, not as a superhero, but somewhere more personal.
I shake the feeling. I never have time to do anything. I don't talk to too many people. Keeping up appearances is harder when you grow up. Especially when people know you have powers, they look at you differently, like you're no longer human, even if the power you have is useless in a fight, even if it seems like a hero power but you only use it to harm or vice versa.
Only one person has seen me for me and talked to me like I was an actual fucking person; it felt good, and I felt complete for once.
_ _ _
I heard voices; they were getting closer to me right as I was leaving for the day. It was Blazer and the new guy. Maybe I should learn his name considering how close he got to Chase and Blazer in just one day.
Actually, looking closer at him, that might not be the best idea; I recognise him now. Fully fucking recognise.
Oh no.
Oh god.
Not him, please, God, not him.
I didn't want to see him like this again on a day that went so poorly for him.
I can do this. I can make it right maybe; I might make it worse, but hey, better to try something than nothing. I can't just pause life and look up what to do to see if it would negatively affect my chance of my relationship with him.
Just be natural, yeah. Natural – that should be easy, right? You just haven't seen him in years, but it's fine. You've both changed, but maybe he remembers you; maybe he will still smile at you like he used to. Maybe your stomach will do backflips when he remembers the name he called you. That one only called you.
But what if he has forgotten you? What if he doesn't remember you at all? Then what? Do I just pretend not to know him, like I was mistaken? If that's the case, I shouldn't use his name at all. I mean, I need to decide quickly before he's gone, before he leaves again.
I'm too slow. He's inviting Blazer somewhere; I can hear them talking and laughing. Faintly, but enough that it feels like I'm being stabbed in the chest over and over. My chest is tight, muscles constricting against my control, heart thumping, vision blurring, my fist balling up ready, not like I'd actually do any damage to either of them.
I hate this feeling, how he always makes me feel.
Why is it always another woman?
Why can it never be me?
Wait, is he walking towards me? Where did Blazer go? I can't see her anymore. Is he waving? At me? I don't see anyone else; it must be at me. My hand goes up without me even thinking, a soft wave, awkward, shy, nervous, or whatever other fucking words I can try to find to describe whatever the fuck my body just did. He's smiling, like fully smiling at me. It's comforting, exactly how I remember it being: gentle but not fake, genuine not forced, small but noticeable.
He's just too fucking cute sometimes.
Wait! I just realised something kind of important: I never actually thought of what to say now that his eyes are on me. Like, can I invite him somewhere? Or does that violate HR? Does he actually want to talk to me?
I'm viciously pulled out of my thoughts by a voice. His voice. "Cat?" It's gentle, soft, and kind – the kind you want to be calling you at 3 in the morning while you're still sleeping, trying your best not to greet the morning sun.
Wait, did he call me Cat?
So he remembers me? That's what it must be, right? He must have thought about me since back then; maybe it was a lot. Hopefully it was more than I was thinking of him.
"Robert?" My voice is dry, struggling to form words; I don't even know if he heard me. Fuck, I don't even know if I heard myself, and it's just my mind filling in the gaps. I can't think straight. I'm being pulled towards him again; I want to talk to him again and pretend everything is the same as back then. But does he want to be that close again? Did he ever feel he was close to me?
"Is it really you?" His voice is gentle but still gruff, the same gentleness he always showed me. "I'm fucking praying it's you, after the day I have had."
"Depending on what you need." I think my voice sounds normal at this point. Wait, fuck, did I just say that? Why can't I be normal? That's the first thing I say to him when I meet him after all these years. "Yeah, it's me, Robert." I can feel my chest tighten, my eyes close involuntarily, and water trying to run its course down my cheek.
"Thank god, I thought I was hallucinating you for a moment there today. It has been rough, although everyone keeps trying to tell me that it went well, all things considered, but yeah." He paused for a moment, almost as if considering my face and finally thinking about what he's actually saying. "Anyway, not important right now. Can I take you out somewhere tonight."
"Not today." Please not today. I cannot see him today for more than this conversation. I already can't handle this. It's too much already. He is too much. My brain really can't keep up with what is currently happening right now. "Maybe at some other point, I'm also busy all weekend." I have to lie to him, if I dont then I'll have to face all these feelings that I had. I am so scared of what he will say after he finds out everything that happened since that day.
"Yeah, I guess we have to have a raincheck on that then." His voice was dejected and sombre like he wanted a different answer out of me then. Of course he wanted a different answer he was the one who asked me out. Wait could that have been a date he was asking me on. No dont think about it too much what happened in the past will just repeat again.
"Saturday." I spoke without thinking much, avoiding eye contact. I really cant look him in the eyes right now. I really need to have had a drink first, and more importantly, I need time to prepare first. "8pm sharp, at the place we always used to go to." I'm already half way down the street before even turning around to know if he's agreed or wants to go. My heart is thumping, I can feel it in my throat.
I guess I asked him on a date instead.