Chapter Text
Spritzi was contentedly watching the Chain milling about. Tidal was dozing with Twilight, Wild and Hyrule. Jacuzii was happily participating in some sort of activity with Sky and Wind. Time was mending a shirt. What caught his eye, however, was Warriors, Four and Legend all gathered around the edge of a pond. Staring hard at the water.
“What was it?”
“I don't know, Four, it was quick…”
Legend used his sword to poke at… Something. Warriors flinched when Legend pulled back.
“Legend, watch it!” Warriors hissed. Legend only smirked at the man, flinging some water at him. Spritzi was amused by Warriors’ disgusted reaction. An idea began to form. A brilliant, heinous, very funny idea. He crouched low, and began to approach.
His steps were silent and calculated. Placed with precision. Slow and steady. Eyes focused on his prey. The three Hylians remained fixated on the water, bickering amongst themselves. Spritzi was close now. Just a few yards away. He waited for them to lean towards the water again. Slowly drawing in a deep breath.
“Seriously, don't touch it!” Warriors barked.
“Quit being a little bitch!” Legend shot back.
“Will both of you shut up?!” Four growled.
BOOWF!
Spritzi barked. And the results were glorious. Four shot straight up into the air, eyes bulging. He spun around mid-air to face him. Legend gave a startled squawk as he too rocketed heavensward. Warriors… Warriors squealed. And rather than jumping straight up, he went in the water. The Captain squealed again, flailing wildly as he struggled to exit the pond as quickly as physically possible.
Spritzi then realized he had collateral damage when he looked back. Hyrule was in a tree, apparently flung when Tidal shot up from the ground. Tidal herself was staring at him with huge eyes. Twilight and Wild had their swords drawn, though Wild started laughing after a few moments. <Spritzi you ASSHOLE! What was that for?!> Jacuzii screeched, Sky and Wind clutched in his arm and tucked to his chest. Time sat where he was, eye as wide as it could go. His thread and needle now through his thumb.
“Spritzi… Spritzi you bastard!” Warriors sputtered, scowling up at him. Four and Legend were now cackling, unable to look at the sopping wet Warriors with a straight face. Tidal had a deadpan face, wings sagging to the ground. Hyrule came down out of the tree, looking disheveled and bewildered. This was better than he'd hoped for.
__
Warriors glared up at Spritzi. That giant yellow bastard had done this on purpose. He could see it in his smug fucking eyes. Then he laughed! A huffing and puffing sound accompanied by wiggling wings. Tidal had the decency to reach over and smack him, bless her heart.
Spritzi only laughed harder.
“Spritzi! Yes, you! Look at me!” the Captain barked. Incandescent rage flooded him when Spritzi had the audacity to look at him with his tongue out! “No, no I don't want to play, you ass! Look what you've done!” He spread his dripping arms out, nasty murky pond water dripping off his entire being.
Spritzi looked him over. Clearly thinking. Then… Then… Warriors found himself back in the pond! He was going to throttle Wind when he got his hands on him: he could hear him laughing. Spritzi was laughing, until a nice loud slap sounded off. Now Warriors was the one laughing as Jacuzii was clearly scolding the larger male! Spritzi looked half-apologetic, and helped him out of the water. Jacuzii slapped him again, sounding much like an agitated squirrel as he shooed Spritzi away.
“Thank you, Jacuzii.” Warriors said softly. Jacuzii was now fussing over him, trying to dry him off. Spritzi still looked amused. The prick. He looked over to Time, who was pulling his needle out of his thumb. Tidal winced beside him. Jacuzii glared at Spritzi on and off, clearly displeased.
__
Spritzi thought it was great. Jacuzii was just being overly fussy! He did feel bad for Time, however… Spritzi approached him with his head bowed. Time had pulled his needle and string out of his thumb. Spritzi gave his land a gentle lap.
“... I would suggest making sure the rest of us know in advance next time. That was pretty good.”
Oh. Spritzi didn't understand the first part, but he did understand the last part. And Time's snort. Hyrule gave him an odd look. Warriors groaned. “Time… Don't encourage him…” he complained. Four gave a loud snort, and Legend openly laughed.
“That was amazing. Holy shit!” Legend cackled. Twilight ran his hands through his hair as he flopped down to sit. Wild said something about wishing he'd been able to take a “video”, whatever that was. Spritzi decided he'd have to try this again some time.