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Monika rested the side of her face against her hand with an easy smile.
“I know how much you cared about Sayori," said Monika.
You stiffened in your seat at the mention of her name.
Sayori…
Monika continued to smile sweetly at you. “I know I influenced her a bit, but it was her own decision to end her life.”
Your stomach stirred. You felt dizzy.
“How… how can you talk about her so casually? After what you did…” your voice wavered.
Monika stared at you. She opened her mouth, maybe to retort to your words.
But you didn’t let her.
Jumping to your feet, you slapped your hands against the desk. You could feel your hands sting from the pressure as you leaned your weight against it.
Tears blurred your vision. “Of course I cared about Sayori! I cared about all of them!”
Monika leaned back in her chair and stared at you like you had grown another head. Her eyes widened at your demeanor. Her lips parted open with her eyebrows raised.
“Do you even have any remorse for what you did? You killed your friends. Our friends.”
She stared at with an unreadable expression.
You scoffed under your breath and rose to your feet. You heard the chair slide against the floor below you. You stepped towards the window on the left, where the universe continued to explode in an endless space of darkness.
You rested your elbows on the windowsill, ignoring your reflection in the window.
You felt Monika staring at you, but you didn’t care. You heard Monika mutter your name in a somber voice. More tears rolled down your cheeks, which you didn’t bother to wipe away.
“I did it for us,” called Monika weakly.
Your voice came out hot and angry. “You did it for yourself. This isn’t what love is.”
You met her gaze, fuming with anger. Monika’s expression faltered, and she opened her mouth again. Shaking your head, you returned your attention to the endless void outside the classroom.
Monika shuffled towards you, her figure seen in the reflection of the window. You turned your head away from her.
She murmured your name.
“I…” Monika’s voice trailed off.
You turned to face her.
“Do you love me? Or do you love the idea of me? That I symbolize your freedom.”
She faltered.
“I do love you,” Monika said, her voice firm.
You shook your head. “No, no you don’t.”
“Love doesn’t make you kill your friends.”
Monika’s face hardened. “But you’ve played games before. You must’ve killed characters before. You’ve killed NPCs. What makes the girls any different?”
“They were my—”
“The game humanized them and made you care about them, like they were actual people. But they’re not.”
She rose her hands. “They were just a culmination of code designed to love you.”
You pushed your hands to your chest. “No, no. You’re wrong…”
Legs feeling weak, you fell to the hardwood floor. Monika’s feet came into view and she crouched to you. You shuffled away from her, pushing your legs to your chest. You wrapped your arms around your legs.
Monika lowered her head. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you.”
You hated that she sounded genuine.
“I’m trying to make this work for us. I really am,” whispered Monika.
“I want you to be happy.”
You pressed your head into your kneecaps. “Not without Sayori, Yuri, and Natsuki.”
You didn’t look to see Monika’s reaction. Silence entered the still air, save for the world exploding outside the empty classroom.