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It was a calm morning. The warm sunlight played easily on Satoru's face as he opened his eyes slowly. He felt an easy pressure on his back when he slightly turned away from the light. He wasn't wearing his bandages, he realized somewhere in the back of his mind. As his vision slowly cleared he saw a black blur turn into beautiful strands of hair, sprawled across his neck, falling lightly onto his chest. Satoru smiled. He felt so at ease as he watched Suguru, cuddled up next to him, breathe in his sleep. It all felt so calm in that moment that he thought time had stopped. That he could just watch Geto's face, relaxed and smiling in his dreams. That he could keep that constant warmth inside of him forever. His head was quiet. All his eyes could focus on where the streaks of cursed energy weaving up and dancing after every exhale of Geto's. He was okay.
Then slowly Geto awoke. Maybe the focus of Gojo's eyes had been too strong, though he found himself not really caring that much.
"Hey," Satoru said softly as he reached over to tuck a piece of Suguru's hair behind his ear. He kept his hand there, carresed his cheek and after a moment he decided to keep it there. Geto looked up at him, his purple eyes a bit hazy, but still having that sparkle that made Gojo so unreasonably happy he couldn't explain it if he tried.
"Hey," Geto replied in a low murmur, his voice full of sleep as he started to sit up. Gojo let his hand fall to the small piece of sheet between them as he let Suguru move to meet him at an eye level. He didn't even think to stop looking at him once.
When he finally reached his desired position, Geto turned his head almost fully to face Gojo. Slowly he moved his body, with his arm leading. It went to cup Gojo's jaw, closer and closer as he leaned in and kissed him slowly.
Gojo let himself be taken. He finally closed his eyes after he realised he probably hadn't blinked in a hot minute. He'd rather watch the way Geto's heart danced anyway.
He leaned into the touch of his hand and slowly reached out his own hand back up, mirroring Geto's actions. Soon he found himself gently pushing Geto back onto his back. He put his arms on his shoulders as if to ground both of them but he didn't rush. He liked the way he felt Geto's hair rise and his skin slightly twitch at every little touch. He liked the way he never stopped kissing back. He let go of the other's mouth as he slotted their foreheads together, let his hands slide a bit further down to his sides and used his thumbs to slowly rub circles right below Geto's clavicles.
"Wanna go make breakfast?" He asked, voice as soft as before. Geto opened his eyes again and at that Gojo pulled back just a bit so he could look straight into them.
"Yeah I'd love that," came Suguru's response, accompanied with a soft smile that melted Satoru to his core.
"All right then," Gojo said and he pushed himself up, using Geto's body to steady himself.
He finally looked away from Suguru and into the sunlight, letting himself enjoy the little tingling sensation on his face. He turned back down and was met with a look of pure adoration.
He held Suguru's hand as they got up and went to the kitchen, both only in their boxers. He didn't need to touch him but he didnt need to do a lot of things. He did this simply because he felt he wanted to. When they got to the kitchen Geto sat on top of their counter, not letting go of Gojos hand as he slotted himself between his legs and looked up at him.
"What do you want, sweetheart?" He said as Geto let go of his hand in favor of threading his fingers through Gojos hair.
"Whatever you decide. What do we have?" Geto said one after the other as he knew Gojo wasn't the best at making these small decisions.
"We can make pancakes or grilled cheese or oatmeal if you want," he replied as he looked around and eyeballed the ingredients they had, letting himself mindlessly be pet as he thought.
"Let's do pancakes." Geto settled on and he let go of his hair as he watched Gojo push back and get to making the batter. He loved watching him cook. It was something so simple yet so mesmerizing to him as he observed. The way he would get concentrated so hard at the task at hand, the way he moved around so effortlessly, the way he kept looking back at him as if to make sure he was still there.
At one point, when Gojo had splayed some batter in the pan after buttering it up more than enough, he silently jumped down and went to embrace him tightly from behind, laying his head on Satoru's shoulder and interlinking his hands around his waist. He loved the way he could feel Gojo's initial shudder and then the steady melt back into him. He loved the way his moves seemed to move in sync with his, feeling every breath fill his lungs. The way his back arched to his chest and the way his hand kept steady on the pan.
Gojo leaned back and nuzzled his own into Geto's head, trying to cuddle him with as much as he could. He slowly started rocking them back and forth in a steady rhythm as he felt Geto's hand ghost just above the waistband of his boxers. They stayed that way, all the way through, until he made them a whole bunch of 10 pancakes. He had been making them regularly now and they started turning out really good, if he might say so himself. Not that he would ever admit that to him anyway. He put them all on one big plate and took two smaller ones and he made his way to the table to set them down nicely.
"Hey, can you grab some chocolate for me and another knife please?"
"Of course I can, sweetie," Suguru's sweet voice came directly from behind him, which startled Gojo and when he turned he saw that Suguru was already carrying the chocolate container, a second knife and some honey for himself.
"You're the best, you know that?" Gojo smiled and leaned in to kiss him again, while Geto put the stuf on the table, not really looking, as he kissed back.
Then they sat down and had breakfast and it was good. The pancakes had turned out really well. Geto was very satisfied and he was basically radiating joy. Still, a little voice at the back of Satoru's head ate away and kept telling him that something was off; this wasn't right, but every time he looked up from his plate and at Suguru it got muted. This was good, they were good and he tried to stop his brain from letting him think otherwise. Eating away at his third pancake, he made himself relax. They rarely had mornings like this, all to themselves to enjoy so he would make the most of it.
They kept eating in silence for a bit then picked up a conversation from yesterday about Shoko. They had sat her down and tried to convince her to tell Ieri about how she felt. And after around 3 hours of the most stubborn conversation of their lives, both had come to the conclusion that Shoko was too deep in her own feelings and had no idea how to help her.
Satoru said something about how he saw himself in Shoko because he, also, was in too deep at one point which made Geto laugh. Gojo couldn't resist lightly smiling too, but he was more content just looking at Suguru's face and the way it lit up with every chuckle.
As his laughter faded, Geto's hand found its way to Gojo's on the table and took it tightly. The playful smile and his eyes flooded with pure admiration said more than any words any of them could say. He held his gaze and time had again slowed now. Maybe this was heaven. Maybe this was all he'd ever need.
"Your pancakes, sweetheart." Getos voice sounded throughout his head and he realised that maybe he was staring for too long. He snapped his eyes back to focus and then looked at his plate, not letting go of Suguru's hand.
"Nahh, I don't think I can eat anymore," he said, letting out a chuckle when he looked at his uneaten pancake.
Silence streched out after that, but something changed. Geto seemed detached, head looking down and his cursed energy was neatly surrounding him like a protection coat. Worry started itching away at Satoru again and just as he opened his mouth to ask Suguru if something was wrong, Geto beat him to the punch.
"You know it's okay, right?" That didn't help Gojo's concern. What was this out of nowhere?
"No- no, what? Hey, is everything alright? Talk to me, honey." At that he heard a low chuckle and then slowly Geto lifted his body, his hair slowly shifting back up, to fall on his back as he turned to face Gojo. His face stilled more and more as they stared into each other, Gojo begging to be close, too paralyzed by fear.
"You're ok, Satoru." He tilted his head slightly at his name, with such a familiar tone of voice that Gojo almost jumped back. His body involuntarily tried to pull away, because that voice had come back, and now it was all he could hear. But the moment the movement reached his arm, he felt a massive force holding him back. Immediately he looked at his hand and saw that Suguru was holding him so tightly, he didn't know if any blood was going to his fingers anymore
"Suguru!" Came out of his mouth, panic bleeding through every letter and when he looked back to him to get something, anything to get him through this, he found Geto's face had again softened, his eyes were closed and he was smiling lightly as if this wasn't the most confusing and scary thing Gojo was going through.
"It's fine, Satoru. We are okay in the end."
Gojo's six eyes immediately saw that his cursed energy seemingly... disappeared? And his grip lightened too. Gojo instinctively went to regain the stability, suddenly kissing the death grip. When his hand reached at nothing, he looked at it in shock. Geto's hand was not there. The room was also dark. The table was empty, and his hand was closed and trembling.
He used all of his willpower to open his palm. As it trembled at every move, it slowly revealed the little button from Geto's uniform that he had left him almost eleven years ago. At the sight, Gojo erupted into sobs. All of this was a ghost from the past. A nightmare he could never escape and that stupid button was taunting him. At one point in time he considered it even romantic. He didn't like the thought because he was supposed to hate Suguru. But he never could. So he kept the button locked away in a box, deep in his closet. Never truly forgotten, but far enough away, in a corner of his mind, he could pretend didn't exist.
His sobs filled the empty room. It was a shell of what he kept in his memory. Cold and dark, most of the surfaces left untouched, leaving room for a layer of dust Shoko was never happy about. The shades were drawn and all of it was caving him in. He didn't know if he could ever feel more alone. His hand had started bleeding from the strong grip. He just wished it would end. He wanted that silence.