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He doesn't know how long it had been. Ze couldn't necessarily keep track of time, considering he was cooped up in a hole for, what, two weeks? Regect told him when he got back, mentioning it briefly, as if he was keeping track.
Ze lets out a sigh, running a hand through his matted hair, grumbling swears and complaints under his breath when his fingers tug a knot. He hasn't really had the energy to do anything with himself. He's been in quite a negative mindset recently, after getting out of the hole, but who wouldn't be? He takes off his hat, placing it on his tableside and standing up, staring at his face in the mirror, letting out a dissatisfied groan as his wings ruffle slightly at the sight of him.
Ze's face has a bit of dirt smudged on it, his hair knotted and matted and just... gross. Hi wings are dirty, the normally white (and slightly black) feathers are now covered in dirt, mud, and more, making it hard to move them. His clothes are dirty, and he probably doesn't smell all that good either. He cringes at the thought. It's not like he purposefully didn't take care of himself, but after being gone for fifteen days and not knowing what was real and what was fake, he doesn't necessarily have the motivation to do anything. He's been laying in his bed, staring up at the ceiling and.. not doing a whole lot more than that.
He realizes he's been somewhat ignoring Regect and Moe, it's not on purpose, he just hasn't had motivation or energy to speak to them. He assumes what would happen if he tried to, and doesn't want to deal with Regects complaints about having to rebuild the house. Ze feels bad, of course, he would've rebuilt it himself if they both hadn't done it so quickly.
Ze falls backwards onto his bed, wincing when his wings hit the bed, forgetting they're there. It's not like he could groom them if he wanted, he definitely can't reach far enough back to make it worth cleaning. He sits up and strips off his hoodie, along with his shirt, letting his wings move freely. He staggers up, walking into the bathroom to have access to a bigger mirror. Ze ignored his initial appearance, paying closer attention to his wings now. He ruffles them around a bit. Still functional, just restricted from certain movements because of all the grime covering his feathers. He groans, running a hand down his face. He could ask Regect, but does he want to deal with his snarky comments?
Of course, he assumes Regect knows how to clean and preen wings, considering hes done it for Ze once before. He was good at it, as if he'd done it for someone else. But he'd probably bully Ze for not being able to clean his wings right now. He doesn't care, doesn't have the energy to. Ze hasn't slept a full night in God knows how long, he doesn't feel well, so why would he have the energy to care what Regect of all people think? He sighs, throwing on his tank-top and walks to Regects room.
Ze realizes he's never actually been in Regects room. It looks the same as his and Moe's, but of course decorated his own way. Posters lazily hung up with led lights illuminating his room softly, glowing a faint blue color. Ze sees Regect on his bed, journal in hand as he does.. whatever he's doing. Drawing, writing, he doesn't know. He just watches his hand move around the page. He stands there for a moment, taking in his room and analyzing it, staring at Regect.
He takes in the view. The blue glow resting on his face, outlining the bits of his face that aren't usually visible. If you look at him in the right lighting, you can see the outline of his face. Ze wonders what he looks like. How soft his face is. How he looks when he blushes. How long his eyelashes are. Ze quickly puts an end to those thoughts, digging his nails in his palm. He doesn't want to be caught yet. Regect is still intently focused on his journal, the gold jewerly wrapped around his arm clinking along with the golden collar that adorns his neck, a broken chain falling down the fromt of it. Ze sees his eyes, golden and still glued to the book. He focuses on his body, the gold ribcage showing on one side, tail laying idly behind him on the bed.
He's wearing those baggy pants he always wears- the one that blend in and look like apart of his body if it weren't for the dark maroon cloth wrapped around his waist, hints of gold sewn into it.
He loses track of how long he's standing there watching, because eventually Regect turns his head ever so slightly and notices Ze's outline, and screams like a little girl. Ze puts his hands up in defense, staring at Regect as he calms down, realizing it's Ze. "Dude, what the fuck?! What are you doing just standing there!?" Regect starts, his tail swishing as if he was an angered stray, staring at Ze before shaking his head, grumbling and putting his journal away.
"I need-" Ze starts, wincing at how small and cracked his voice sounds. He hasn't spoken recently. He hasn't spoken in days, actually. He clears his throat, and continues. "I need your help with my wings." He says, a bit louder this time around, but still equally as weak and cracked. Regect stares at him for a second, groaning and complaining.
"You can't do it yourself?" He whines, staring at Ze. "Turn on the light."
Ze obliges, flicking the switch and wincing at the bright light that now illuminates the room. He stares at Regect, and Regect stares back. "Dude.. you look like shit." Regect comments, a snarky smirk on his face as Ze rolls his eyes.
"Yeah- yeah, whatever. Are you gonna help, or no?" He grumbles, walking a bit closer to Regect, albeit a bit sheepish in his movements.
"Yeah, I'll help. I gueessss," he drags on, rolling his eyes playfully. "Sit down." Regect says, patting the edge of his bed. It shocks Ze slightly- to see Regect not teasing or messing with him like he used to. Is it because of him disappearing? Ze assumes so. He's not exactly against it, it's just... weird, thats all. Regect moves himself into the middle of the bed, the jewerly clinking along with the monitor on his ankle. Ze sits on the edge of the bed, taking off his shirt and discarding it onto the floor, ruffling his wings slightly. Regect stares, and stares. The grime and dirt, the broken and bloodied pin feathers. "..You should probably get in a shower before this. Or, like, let me wash your wings. Something to make it easier." Regect suggests, causing Ze to grumble.
"Whatever, whatever," he complains. "Do whatever will help, I don't care." He says with a wave of his hand, glancing back at Regect for a moment before diverting his gaze back to his hands, resting them in his lap.
It's calming. Ze comes to the conclusion, maybe Regect isn't as bad as he thought. His hands working through Ze's feathers, spraying lukewarm water onto them and going in with a slightly damp rag, bubbles slightly foaming as Regect continues rubbing the grime off as gently as he could. "Sorry. About, y'know. The house, and-" Ze starts, being abruptly cut off by Regect.
"Dude. You've already apologized, like, fifty times. It's fine. I just don't know what possessed you to do that. Like, I- I didn't plan to rebuild the entire house with Moe some random day." Regect complains, although keeping his touch on Ze's feathers gentle, as if they were the most fragile things in the world. "I mean, imagine I disappeared and came home. And just like, destroyed the entire house." He continues, huffing out a laugh. "But really, it's fine. No worries." Ze replies with a hum, letting out a sigh of relief as his muscles loosen, letting himself lean ever so slightly into Regects hands.
"..I don't know. I just needed to make sure it was real- that you were real. That's kinda why I freaked out after and made you prove yourself." Ze speaks softly, fiddling with his hands. Regect hums to show he's listening, removing the broken pin feathers as gently as possible while occasionally wiping them down with the rag, making Ze ruffle his wings.
"I don't really want to get into it. I'm not good with speaking out about how i'm feeling, or- or stuff that's happened." Ze starts. "The hole, it just... It had a fake you, and a fake Moe. And I thought it was all real. It took me so, so long to realize it was fake. All of it was fake, Regect. I.." He admits, his voice cracking a little at the end. "I thought it was really you guys. The fake you was nicer though, so it helped me figure it out." He jokes, and Regect lets out a grumble.
"Are you calling me rude? After everything I've done for you?" Regect says, punching Ze's back lightly before continuing to work on his wings. "Hell, I'm even doing this for you. I could be sound asleep, but nooo. Ze needs help with his wings." Regect mocks, raising the pitch in his voice at the end slightly. Ze huffs, letting out a slight laugh along with Regect. Regect continues working on Ze's wings, finishing with straightening out the pinned feathers and removing the messed up ones. "You uh.. You don't have to talk about anything that happened in the hole. Obviously. But it's obvious it's been weighing on you. Just look at your hair, and your face." Regect comments, and Ze internally flinches at how right he is. "If you ever wanna talk, I... Me and Moe are here for you, I guess." He finishes, slightly cringing at the fact hes not teasing Ze. Regect sits, fiddling with his sleeves as Ze sighs.
"The hole. It uh.." He takes a deep breath, groaning. "Nothing too bad. Nothing I couldn't handle, obviously. I just.. I guess I made up scenarios, or- or was put into them, or something. Fake you, and fake Moe. Just.. hard to tell what's real and fake sometimes." Ze explains rather shortly, deciding he doesn't want to bring up the Eyes and that its for another time. "I guess- I guess it just messed me up a bit. Two weeks in a hole isn't necessarily uh.. ideal."
Especially while making false memories with your only two friends. He decides to leave that part out, spreading out his wings, turning his head back slightly before completely rotating to face Regect, Ze's gaze still fixated on his lap. He can feeling Regects tail occasionally tapping the bed, assuming the swaying is out of boredom. Regect seemingly stares at Ze, analyzing his face before taking Ze's hands into his own. Ze snaps his head up, staring at where Regects face would be- where he'd be able to see his eyes if he weren't an entity. Regect just holds the others hands in his own, unaware of what to do from here. He rubs his thumb gently across Ze's hand, diverting his gaze away from his face in fear of how he'll react.
"Uh.. I- I'm here. For you. I know I said that already, but- Fuck," Regect stumbles on his words, gulping. "Like.. whatever you need I'm here. I know I'm kind of a dick to you, but, like.. It's never sincere."
He mumbles, his voice low and quiet, something Ze had never heard before. "..Thank you," Ze quietly mutters, clearing his throat a moment afterwards. "Uh.. Yeah- yeah. Thanks, dude."
Regect hums in response, continuing to rub his thumbs alongside Ze's hands before letting out a yawn, moving his hands to stretch above his head as if he were a cat. Ze lets out a small laugh, earning a glare from Regect.
"Okay, I'm tired, and I need my beauty sleep. You can, like, go to your room. Or- or stay. I really don't care," Regect grumbles out, laying backwards. It might've been a dumb decision on Ze's end, but he decides to lean forward, following Regect down, laying ontop of him. He wraps the two of them in his wings, yawning shortly after Regect. He wraps his arms lazily around Ze, earning a swat.
"Dude. Thats, like, gay." He teases, making Regect let out a groan.
"Oh my god, shut up."
For the first time since Ze came back, he sleeps peacefully.