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“Say no.”
Ryujin lifted her head to see an out of breath Princess mere feet away from her in the middle of the training grounds. The morning was ripe and the air around them stilled with flecks of dust from the ground. They were alone. Wiping the sweat off her face, Ryujin thought back to everything she’d wanted to say once confronted yet words failed her. Letting the wooden sword fall to her side, Ryujin’s mouth hung agape as the words she’d hoped to say entirely vanished.
Steadying her breathing, the Princess, Sayeon, strode towards Ryujin. She was desperate. Her words were a command rather than an option. “Tell me you are going to say no.”
Shaking her head, Ryujin scoffed, “It’s the King’s orders.”
“It is still yet to be official,” Sayeon reasoned, “Your suitor has yet to propose and you do not have to say yes when he does.”
An engagement was supposed to be a momentous occasion in one’s life but for Ryujin, it was a necessary step to protect those she loved. Even this spoiled Princess whom she’d fallen pathetically in love with was not immune to that. The orders of her engagement came from above Sayeon. She could not stop it unless she herself was King.
Looking down, Ryujin shrugged, “It’s out of my hands. The King is above all of us.”
Evidently, that was not the answer Sayeon wanted. She was temperamental though. Given a few weeks, she would likely forget who Ryujin was and move onto her next toy. For Sayeon didn’t love Ryujin, she just loved having someone under thumb. Ryujin was happy to play that role as she provided her family privileges not available elsewhere. Until now.
“The King is only doing this to spite me,” Sayeon snapped, “but you will lose your rank. Everything you’ve worked for and you will lose your place at my side forever.”
“Sayeon-“ Ryujin attempted to reach out to her but in response, Sayeon took a step back, forcing herself just out of Ryujin’s reach.
Her expression was cold. She’d shifted from being a frantic mess mere seconds ago to a calculating chess master that wasn’t fond of losing its pieces. Not until she was finished with them. Although, she was never truly finished playing with Ryujin. She wasn’t convinced she ever would be.
Without the faintest familiarity, Sayeon commanded she be called, “Your Highness.”
Hesitantly, Ryujin obliged. She had always been so particular about her title. As if she wanted people to view her not as a human but as a deity protecting their Kingdom. Her ability to perform to the masses was frightening in that the acting didn’t stop once the curtains had drawn.
Clearing her throat, Ryujin continued, “…Your Highness, with all due respect, I simply can’t.”
Ryujin glanced at Sayeon only briefly but her eyes were swirling mad with possibilities and plans. It was like watching a bomb tick between complete destruction or diffusing itself at the last second. More than anything, Sayeon despised being outsmarted, especially by Ryujin. Not that she’d intended to, it had simply been the way things fell into place.
“What has he offered?” Sayeon asked eagerly, “You would have never agreed to this without some external clause.”
Ryujin sighed, “Yesol. He promised he’d spare her from execution.”
Yesol and a small portion of the Begonia group had attempted regicide, the highest form of treason. Of course, Sayeon had foiled the plans herself but Ryujin had failed to tell her that one of the criminals was her family until it was far too late. Then, the King approached her with a deal and a desperate man will do desperate things for the ones he loves. Thus, Ryujin went from the Princess’ lapdog to the King’s.
This revelation only seemed to frustrate Sayeon. She nibbled at the ends of her fingernails and began to pace, muttering to herself. Again, Ryujin attempted to touch her shoulder in comfort but she was, again, swatted away. Yet, their close proximity remained.
Her voice was breaking and her eyes were running like a wild dog backed into a corner as she spoke, “I could have fixed that for you! You needn’t only ask and I-“
“Not even you can stop the King, Your Highness. That’s why you’re the Princess and he’s King,” Ryujin grumbled with exasperation, “I should be lucky he didn’t execute me with Yesol.”
Like a switch, Sayeon’s expression fell and her words became as piercing as ice. This time, she reached for Ryujin and placed a hand on her cheek, “But you’re my Knight. Your fate is mine to decide.”
By the time Ryujin had looked between Sayeon and her hand, her expression had shifted once more, this time into a grimace. It was the kind of expression Ryujin knew she was only privy to. With the light brush of her fingertips against her cheek, Ryujin grinned rather giddily. How foolish that such simple intimacies had a way of making her chest grow warm with anticipation.
“All these years I’ve been at your side and you think I made this decision without considering you too?” Ryujin laughed with a rather hollow echo. Her brows furrowed as she continued, “He’s given you a golden opportunity. You need to take it. You can’t succeed in your goals with me at your side any longer.”
She didn’t appear to ponder long before realising what Ryujin meant. Ryujin had brought a plethora of rumours to Sayeon with the rather…strange dynamic of their relationship from outsiders perspective. Many were truer than those gossipers could know.
However, both knew whatever they were would ultimately be temporary. No laws truly stopped them from being more, simply the judgement of the aristocracy in all its overbearing pressure. Moreover, Sayeon was a Princess and politically she knew her duties were designated elsewhere.
“You could earn me,” Sayeon rationalised with herself but to Ryujin it just looked like she was spiralling, “It would be unconventional and perhaps take some convincing publicly but if you began courting me through tournaments-“
“Why would I court you when I’m more than familiar with your bed, Your Highness?” Ryujin teased hoping to lighten the mood.
Sayeon didn’t find it amusing.
“If you utter such nonsense they may still put you on the chopping block with Yesol,” she spat in response.
Sayeon’s hand fell to her side and Ryujin pretended not to see how it curled into a tight fist. Perhaps she’d enjoy seeing Sayeon in so much anguish over her, if not for the fact it pained her just as much to be in this situation.
Chuckling to herself, Ryujin poked the centre of Sayeon’s forehead, who looked at her with a mix of contempt and shame. “You’re in checkmate. Time to lose the Queen piece.”
“And how do I do that?” Sayeon asked and Ryujin had never seen her look so stubbornly helpless.
“When the King asks you relieve me of my title- say yes.”
——————
For Min, he had one duty and one duty alone. Guard Sayeon and obey her commands. Most of the time he would simply watch her, report back to Samin, report to the King and repeat.
In the beginning, it had been easy. Sayeon was rather passive towards the King despite his constant attempts to joust her from lineage all together. Frankly, she treated him with the same weight as a child wanting to keep playing for five more minutes.
She knew at the end of the day, she was the one entitled to the throne and that, whether by her hand or not, she would be sitting on the throne over his corpse.
Min watched from afar as Sayeon twirled the knight piece between her fingers. She appeared to be in a deep contemplative state. Standard for this time of day if Min was not also aware of Ryujin’s incoming engagement.
He’d never fully understood the full scope of their relationship. He wasn’t entirely sure they did either. In theory, Sayeon should let Ryujin go without any qualms. After all, she is only one person and what possible long term influence could she hold over her?
“Min,” Sayeon abruptly called out to him, “What are the costs of assassins nowadays?”
Caught a little off guard, Min lowered his head, “I wouldn’t know, Your Highness.”
Narrowing her eyes, Sayeon placed the knight piece down as she spoke bluntly, “Really? I thought you were one.”
He was and he could see there wasn’t a doubt in her mind that she was right. However, he couldn’t confirm her beliefs.
“I’m afraid not, Your Highness,” Min responded.
“Is that so? What a shame.”
Very rarely did Sayeon speak to Min. She only ever needed him as a tool to utilise for her needs. At first, he’d assumed Ryujin was the same and that she just met separate needs than he did.
It wasn’t until the day Sayeon’s carriage had been attacked on the return to the palace did he realise how incorrect his assumptions had been.
Iseul, himself and several other Knights had been ordered to attend to the attack site. Many considered the possibility of the Princess being dead as the assassins stemmed from the rather ruthless Begonia group.
Min knew she would be perfectly fine. Min concluded several possible scenarios upon their arrival. He’d pictured her afraid of what she may have done or apathetic to the destruction around her. He’d imagined her a Princess becoming truly aware of her status and…he wasn’t entirely incorrect in that assumption.
The only scenario he hadn’t considered was the image of Ryujin standing over several assassins bodies while Sayeon wore this almost manic smile on her face. In that moment, he saw a sickening spark in Sayeon’s eyes he thought was impossible. None of the other Knights seemed to catch it. However, Min had and he didn’t intend to forget it.
The way Ryujin had breathlessly towered over the bodies, the blood of those she’d killed and her own converging with one another. Each limp body sprawled across the other as if they had sought human connection in their final moments out of sheer fear of power.
Despite all of that, despite her monstrous display, Ryujin wiped her mouth and walked over to the Princess, extending her hand.
“You okay?” was all she asked.
The gesture was all the assurance Sayeon needed as she gracefully thanked the treacherous Knight for her service. Seeing Ryujin mercilessly kill so many on her behalf had brought a thrill to Sayeon. A public display of just how much Ryujin cared about her for all other Knights to see.
Even after the fact, he’d seen how Sayeon’s gaze lingered on Ryujin as she was patched up by Iseul. It was same calculating furrow of her brows, yet it didn’t seem to stem from the plotting he was used to seeing from her. It was more personal. Not that Min was exceptionally inclined towards understanding those feelings.
Upon that day, it was clear to everyone why Ryujin had been selected as Sayeon’s personal Knight. Although, some took different things from the exchange. Some praised Ryujin’s resilience, her kindness, her strength, her ability to strike fear by mere presence.
What Min had learned was that Ryujin was intuitively aware of what Sayeon wanted before she even knew it herself.
That was how she succeeded in being a puppet for Sayeon where Min failed. Her standard resistance to Sayeon made her obedience much more valuable.
Different puppets served different purposes. Min’s purpose was whatever Samin wanted of him and currently, that involved obeying Sayeon.
“Min,” Sayeon beckoned to him once more, “Summon Duke Han for me. I have something I wish to discuss with him.”
Duke Han was one of the most prominent neutral figures over who should take the throne. He held strong connections with the Gyeon family and most importantly, was successor to Aera Son, the most influential Duke the kingdom had seen in decades. However, both of these connections shared one thing, their opposition of the previous King, Sayeon’s mother.
If Sayeon won him over, the Gyeon family would likely follow suit and she’d gain over a third of the Kingdom’s assets from those two parties alone. She could do whatever she wished and gain the throne as a bonus. There wasn’t a doubt in Min’s mind that’s exactly what she’d do.
He nodded, “I’ll send for him immediately, Your Highness.”
Samin had told him once that if you move a bird from the cage it’s lived in all its life to a slightly larger cell, how are they supposed to know that isn’t what freedom looks like?
It made him wonder what kind of bird Ryujin would be.
A crow? No. That wasn’t right.
Maybe a dove. Yes, they were always the ideal sacrifices. Always nicer to look at than to hear squawk.
——————
The gentlemen Ryujin was set to marry was fine. He was a man, she supposed, and a man she had to marry. When she looked at him, she truly couldn’t decipher him from the next man over. He was plain, boring and insignificant to her. Their arrangement was nothing more than the paperwork they would sign.
They’d met briefly once. She’d been forced to dress up in some stifling dress and have tea with him. Sitting in a garden that had no flowers, they’d exchanged pleasantries. He’d asked about her upbringing and her time as a Knight but Ryujin wasn’t giving him her full attention.
She assumed his appearance was slightly above average. She couldn’t really say. All men held the same amount of appeal to her. He was brunette, a few shades darker than Iseul, with this empty look in his eyes hidden behind a pair of glasses. A part of her wondered if he’d heard rumours of her attraction to someone in glasses.
His lack of care for anything she said was expected. The whole thing was unsettlingly staged and uncomfortable for the pair of them. Juni had served them with this exasperated look as she poured tea or brought food. Ryujin wondered if her face was of a similar state.
They spoke, ate and when they were finished he stood and said, “You’ll do, I suppose.”
Sufficed to say, Ryujin wasn’t exceptionally flattered by her husband to be.
Besides, he was the least of her concerns.
Sayeon had not so much as glanced in her direction since she’d asked her to accept the proposal. She was like a petulant child getting their toy taken away. Apparently, she’d been firing other knights left and right. A tantrum, according to the King. To Ryujin, it felt like something else but neither were communicating with the other for her to know what that was.
Not to mention how the maids whispered that they’d had to order replacements to some of her furniture. Her ‘tantrums’ didn’t lie just in firing Knights apparently.
“Your Majesty, I’ve come here to ask for your permission to marry Ryujin Kang.”
His words snapped her back to reality. They were in the Royal Hall with its fluorescent lights that induced headaches and chatter that drilled into Ryujin’s mind. She’d become a professional in tuning it all out. However, she could not ignore this.
The man, she knew to be her fiancé as she recalled the last time she had displeasure of meeting him, kneeled before the King who sat proudly on his throne. It was fascinating how a man’s presence could be so grandiose yet still feel so insignificant. His large figure and greying hair indicating wisdom was undermined by his frequent foolish remarks.
A little further away was someone that defied his existence, Sayeon. She sat with a straightened back in her seat, observing the keeling man like a rat walking into her trap.
To Sayeon’s right was none other than Ryujin. Her hands rested on the hilt of her sword as the entire hall fell into silence. The King played along, as if the result of this had not been predetermined.
“You wish to marry my Knight-“
“My Knight,” Sayeon intercepted.
With a laugh, the King ignored the clear animosity in her voice, “Yes, yes. My Princess’ Knight. But you see, she’s married to this Kingdom. She could never settle down.”
“I have much to offer the Kingdom she loves and much to offer her,” the man performed brilliantly, glancing at Ryujin only briefly to ensure she was not backing out.
Loved this Kingdom? Fat chance. At most, she loved the people she’d met here. The Kingdom itself was rampant with corruption from the very top with the King and trickling all the way down to the merchant selling goods on the street.
All were greedy and needy. Honestly, she’d be happy to see everyone in this room perish before her eyes. They gawked at her life as if it were a performance and yet, she never recalled entering a theatre house.
The King pretended to mull over his options and started, “Well, if you-“
“Well, why don’t we ask her what she wants?” Sayeon suggested with a bitter smile only Ryujin recognised.
The look in her eyes was maddening and perhaps only now, when she was staring at her so intently, had Ryujin noticed how sore those eyes looked. The red and swollen nature of them only hidden behind her similarly red-rimmed glasses. She was screaming at Ryujin to say no when she knew she couldn’t. This wasn’t about either of them, this was about Ryujin’s family and making amends for the past.
Her eyes didn’t leave Sayeon as she answered, “I accept the proposal…so long as her Highness finds it acceptable.”
Squinting, Sayeon appeared to wait for Ryujin to give in or take back her statement. Perhaps she waited for her to show a flinch of regret. She wanted to call Ryujin’s bluff to avoid the change. However, Ryujin kept her gaze, even cocking her head to the side as if to challenge Sayeon.
Sayeon looked away first as she huffed, “Very well. You are relinquished of all duties to me. Do as you wish.”
Her usually perfectly poised posture slouched as she rested her head against the palm of her hand, elbow propped on the armchair. To others, she may have looked pouty and a little spoiled. To Ryujin, she looked like she was barely keeping it together as she tugged at the ends of her hair.
With that, Ryujin finally looked away and faced her, now, fiancé. They stood opposite each other, not even the faintest spark of attraction shared. Although, if Ryujin squinted her eyes, his blank eyes were similar enough to hers. Similar but never quite the ones she wanted.
——————
“Pardon?” Sayeon repeated.
Surely the King had not just told her Ryujin would be moving away immediately after the wedding?
“I’m afraid so,” the King feigned a sigh, “It’s simply easier for her and her husband. His main work is in the next country over so for practicalities sake I’ve allowed them to depart soon after the ceremony.”
“Why the hurry?” Sayeon tried to hide the shock in her voice by forcing a smile, “Surely she should be given some respite after- here, for all she’s done.”
The King shook his head, “It’s been decided and Ryujin has complied with the terms.”
Sayeon’s fingernails dug into her palms as she squinted at the King.
“Did she?”
“Why of course. Those two love each other very much. They can barely keep their hands off each other.”
A bold faced lie. A lie that truly got under her skin. Not to mention how he proudly displayed Ryujin’s sword in his chambers as they spoke. Shameless, really. To take such an object and leave it there as if it were simple decoration was an insult in its own right.
Her gaze shot towards the Knight beside the King. Their hair was dark, almost purple like Ryujin’s. Sayeon didn’t wish to be further reminded of her failures.
“You,” she spoke, pointing directly at him, “I don’t wish to see your face anymore. Leave. Permanently.”
He seemed to hesitate, glancing between Sayeon and the King. The King shrugged and waved his hand for him to leave. Perhaps she should restrain herself from firing every Knight that looked at her slightly wrong. Perhaps Sayeon had considered this and concluded she didn’t have a reason to care anymore.
Despite Sayeon’s attempts to argue her case to the King, despite her hitting him with every logical argument as to why Ryujin marrying was a bad idea, his expression was always the same. A knowing, smug grin that he’d won because no matter the logic to her arguments, they stemmed from feeling.
She left the King’s chambers, biting her nails and muttering to herself. She couldn’t beat him on pure logic alone. She’d considered finally reaching out to the faction backing her reign, but that would take too long. By the time she’d have reached the throne, Ryujin would be gone and the possibility that she’d have been forced into a life of servitude was high.
Sayeon needed more power. Some sort of divine intervention.
As she walked, she didn’t notice the world around her fall away. The pitch black encroached upon her, slivering into every crevice of her reality. Her feet gave away and she tumbled into the nothingness that weighed upon her like water. Soon, she felt herself drowning as all her senses were denied from her. She spluttered for air until another voice spoke, returning her ability to breathe.
“Your Highness?” a voice called to her.
It was Ryujin’s. However, it was hollow, empty and purely mimicking her memory.
This ‘Ryujin’ stood in a white wedding dress. It was low cut with patterns of branches that bloomed flowers on the end of it ascending the torso. Descending the dress were the same flowers wilting and petals that settled at the rim of the dresses cut. Her sleeves were of a similar design in lace that wrapped around her throat. She had a veil obscuring her face yet Sayeon could sense her disapproving glare.
As pathetic as it was, Sayeon thought she looked breathtakingly stunning. Would she hate her for what she was planning?
Just by her side, Sayeon noticed the silhouette of a child. It had a round face, silver eyes and laughed at her.
“Do not torment me with that,” Sayeon spat, speaking into the darkness.
The illusion faded away and in its place an eye emerged from the dark, glowing with intent on finally trapping Sayeon into a deal. Each ring of its eye seemed to hide some form of trickery. It narrowed its gaze knowing it had an opening here.
This Godling, as they were called, had been working on Sayeon for years now. She had thought herself free of it after so many months without a word but after Ryujin’s wedding was announced all her dreams seemed to be of this observing eye. She had to admit, it was certainly an opportunist.
“I can help you,” its voice echoed through Sayeon’s very core.
“So you’ve told me,” Sayeon scoffed, “My sister turn you down again?”
The Godling ignored that comment. “I’m speaking the truth. You want that mortal? I have ways of making it happen.”
“You’ve told me that too. Are you just rehashing the same lines over and over?”
Sayeon didn’t resist its offer because she didn’t want it. Honestly, the offer was good. However, she wanted to wear it thin. She wanted the offer on her terms. If she could hold off on an offer for as long as possible and then take it last minute, she may benefit from it more than the Godling would. It was a theory she was trialing.
The eye faded away and, briefly, Sayeon thought she’d annoyed it into leaving her alone. That idea was short lived as a memory played out in front of her. She stood at the foot of her bed as she saw herself and Ryujin laying facing each other.
The two lay in a comfortable silence. Ryujin had been absentmindedly massaging Sayeon’s right hand with the crooked finger. She’d always enjoyed feeling over the imperfection as if to remind herself Sayeon was also a human being. She recalled how she’d been playing with Ryujin’s hair when she abruptly declared-
“I love you, Sayeon Lee.”
Pausing, Sayeon searched for the lie in her words. From her soft expression to the way her words came out in a hushed tone, she found no lies from Ryujin. She truly believed she loved her.
In that moment, Sayeon had gone to open her mouth to return the feelings. Not because she particularly felt them but because it was what she’d learned was expected in such a situation. Ryujin knew that all too well and covered her mouth immediately.
“Don’t say it. I know you don’t feel the same.”
She didn’t even have the opportunity to correct Ryujin to call her by her actual title.
Moving her hand away, Sayeon asked, “Then why?”
“I’m willing to wait for the day you do.”
“And if that day never comes?”
With a cocky grin, Ryujin hummed, “I don’t know. I’d say I’m about half way into your twisted heart already. You’ll love me and I can’t wait to see it ruin your life.”
She was only joking then. She didn’t know how true her words would become.
The memory melted into another with Sayeon sat playing chess by herself, muttering strategies under her breath. Meanwhile, Ryujin was stood to the side, guarding her as she’d spent most of her days.
Sayeon couldn’t have known back then but when she saw Ryujin standing there, she noticed how her gaze never left Sayeon. Her hardened frown slowly melting into a coy smile as she approached Sayeon and kissed her cheek.
She’d flinched in response, not because she was afraid of the intimacy, but because she hadn’t sensed Ryujin approaching. She had allowed herself to relax so much to her surroundings that she didn’t even feel Ryujin’s presence come or go. That was more terrifying than anything to Sayeon.
Ryujin didn’t seem to notice and just murmured, “I love you,” as she pulled away.
A little flustered, Sayeon huffed, “What’s that for? I’m only playing chess.”
“I just felt it. So, I announced it,” Ryujin shrugged.
“That’s illogical,” Sayeon stated, wiping her cheek.
Ryujin quirked an eyebrow, “You’d prefer I keep it to myself?”
“Preferably, yes.”
Watching Sayeon’s reaction, Ryujin tilted her head rather sombrely. Did she have no other way of keeping Ryujin by her side other than creating misery? Was that all she could offer her?
Sayeon couldn’t bring her the love she desired and she couldn’t bring her safety like she’d promised her when she first became her Knight. On every level, Sayeon had failed Ryujin.
“There’s no one here but you and me, Sayeon. What’re you afraid of?” Ryujin had said.
“Your Highness,” Sayeon corrected as she moved her Queen piece back a few spaces.
The scene faded and the Godling’s voice cooed through her mind, “I must wonder what were you afraid of? By then, surely you knew, just how much you loved her?”
“What are you trying to get at?” Sayeon demanded as she tried to hide how her jaw clenched with every memory.
She could feel herself growing unsettled. The Godling had been restraining itself but today, of all days, it had decided it wanted to go straight for the kill. Perhaps it was as desperate for a deal as Sayeon was for a way out.
It didn’t respond. Another memory began to unfold and Sayeon heard it before she saw it. Heavy breathing and the sound of flesh being whacked at full pelt. Turning around, she immediately recognised it.
For a moment, she just watched as Ryujin was hunched over her body hitting her face over and over. Overhead, Ryujin had slammed her sword beside Sayeon, causing her to laugh manically at the attempt to intimidate.
However, Ryujin was far from amusing her. She was livid at her for allowing a whole group of Knights to walk into a known death trap. From Sayeon’s perspective, if she didn’t send them in the enemy would’ve known she had insider intel. They had been necessary sacrifices.
Not to Ryujin. She was convinced there was a way that didn’t involve the sacrifice of those people.
Sayeon’s face had been bruised from the beating as blood trickled into her mouth. So long had passed and Sayeon could still feel the rush from the metallic taste in her mouth and the throbbing pain of her face. Reminiscing, Sayeon touched her own lips with a smile.
Within the memory, Ryujin pulled her up and began to shout at her, “Stop being so selfish! These are people’s lives you’re playing with!”
“I give them a purpose-“ Sayeon tried to argue.
“You give them death,” Ryujin retorted, “You give them misery and loathing and hatred for life. If you have to use anyone, use me. I don’t even care if your antics kill me.”
For some reason, Sayeon’s face fell. Her previous playful and erratic behaviour seemed to die at Ryujin’s request to be used. She should have been thrilled, exhilarated at the thought of Ryujin handing herself on a silver platter. Yet, Sayeon just felt unsettled.
She’d reached up to Ryujin, smearing some of the blood on her cheek in an almost ritualistic manner. Ryujin would be her Knight until the end of time. That’s what she’d told herself in the moment.
“No,” Sayeon had responded, “That’s not an idea I’m fond of.”
The memory faded and that glowing observer appeared once more.
“I must ask, what frightened you about her request?” it spoke with a knowing undertone.
Her chest grew heavy as the sinking feeling of it all began to unravel. She hated to recall that day. It had a way of invading everything she thought she knew about herself and destroying it. It took her path of logic and tore it to shreds.
Everything about this made her sick. Ryujin had been right. These feelings towards her were ruining her life and she had no one to blame but herself. She’d figured she could control it. Control how her throat tightened around Ryujin, how she was overcome with a desire to consume her entirely at the slightest of smiles and how she grew afraid for a future where she would no longer be there.
That day, as Ryujin beat her half to death, was the day Sayeon knew she’d lost to Ryujin.
Sayeon choked on her words, “…I realised I didn’t want to use her anymore. I just wanted her stay by my side. As she was.”
The Godling couldn’t smile but she could see how it’s eye curved into what could only be the crease of a grin.
“What you’re feeling now- that ache in your chest- I can make it go away.”
Sayeon didn’t answer but she indicated that, for a change, she was listening.
“As per our agreement,” The Godling started, “You lose your humanity. I give you enough power to go down in the history books. The main thing here is that humanity. You lose it and you’ll never have to be weighed down by that all consuming need for her. In theory, you’d be free of this torment.”
Much to Sayeon’s surprise, it made an excellent point. She could kill two birds with one stone. With more power, she could quickly become King, as she should have already been. Simultaneously, she could get Ryujin back, if she even felt the need to anymore. Without her humanity, would she still need Ryujin? There were many factors to evaluate.
“I’ll consider it,” was all Sayeon responded with.
It was clearly all the Godling needed as she found herself alone in her dimly lit room, fist clenched with a shattered mirror before her. No matter how much she stared at the shards she couldn’t seem to construct the human face Ryujin had seen in her.
——————
In spite of her losing her title as Knight, until some guest chambers were arranged for her, Ryujin was stuck in the Knight’s quarters so she hadn’t truly felt the loss of her title yet. She could still talk with the friends she’d made like Iseul or spar with Min, which is exactly what she happened to be doing when he asked-
“Why don’t you just do as the Princess wishes?” Min inquired to Ryujin as their wooden blades clashed mere inches from each other’s face.
His question was enough to catch Ryujin off guard and she tumbled backwards, the back of her head hitting the ground with a resounding thud. The impact created an instantaneous throbbing that she just knew wouldn’t disappear in time for the wedding.
When she opened her eyes, she found Min’s sword pointed at her throat as he towered over her. He dropped the sword to his side and extended his hand to her. With a firm clasp on the other, Min pulled Ryujin to her feet.
“You said that on purpose, didn’t you?” Ryujin groaned, rubbing the back of her head.
“No. I was genuinely curious,” Min replied and honestly, Ryujin believed him.
Underhanded tactics was all Sayeon. Min was a just knight, of sorts. He obeyed Sayeon’s every command without question or hesitation to a sickening degree but that was kind of his job. She couldn’t exactly criticise him for it.
He continued, “So?”
“I can’t. I’m loyal to Sayeon in every way but…my family comes first.”
“Why?”
“Just my priorities, I guess,” Ryujin tapped her foot as she considered how to explain this to someone like Min, “I mean, is there really no one in your life you care about more than Sayeon?”
He nodded, “There is.”
“Imagine you’re in my place then. You can pick Sayeon and that person dies or you pick that person and Sayeon dies. What’re you picking?”
Min didn’t even think about it before saying, “Sayeon.”
Tilting her head, Ryujin had to be sure she’d spoken correctly. Pinching the bridge of her nose, she attempted to elaborate, “But that person-“
“It’s not about what I want. They’d want me to save her and…I’m not sure I could face them again if she died,” Min insisted.
“Are they a hardcore royalist or something?”
“Not exactly.”
Yeah, she was never getting through to him.
“If Sayeon did die, I would be glad,” Min announced and Ryujin had to blink a few times to make sure she wasn’t dreaming.
Ryujin had to confirm she’d heard him correctly, “Min, that’s treason.”
“Forget I said anything then,” he mumbled.
Conveniently, Ryujin’s attention was redirected to a growing crowd outside the sleeping quarters. An enthusiastic maid waved her over and shouted, “Ryujin! Something arrived in your room!”
Immediately, Ryujin was hit with this deep seat nausea and anxiety. The maid, Juni was a friend, of sorts. She was certainly always at the scene of some drama related crime and her eyepatch made her unbelievably shady to others. Despite her gossiping nose, that was currently worrying Ryujin deeply, Juni was one of the highest ranking maids in the palace.
So with all of that in mind, seeing this catch her attention was like watching a suicidal man walk straight into a bomb.
She rushed over to see a large group of people gawking into her room and whispering to each other. Juni seemed thrilled by the whole thing, clapping as if it was all some game, but Ryujin was just unsettled by this much attention.
“What’s going on?” Ryujin asked, pushing through the crowd.
Iseul was at the front with a beaming smile. Then, just beyond him, she saw it. A white dress of lace and the most intricate stitching was laid out on her bed. From its long sleeves depicting various flowers thats branches wrapped around the neck, with the low cut hem to how the dress appeared a precise fit for her proportions, it was as if someone was intimately familiar with every curve of Ryujin’s body. It was all so…grandiose in the most flattering way possible.
Iseul couldn’t help but giggle, “Your future husband must certainly love you.”
“I guess he does,” Ryujin responded a little bewildered.
It felt so wrong. The man was far from pleasant and had expressed little interest in her outside of his obligations so why would he do something so romantic?
Ryujin lifted a small card that had been tucked in with the dress. It read : ”A dress suited for a future Queen.”
Upon reading the card, Ryujin burst out laughing with tears in her eyes. No one knew of why she’d reacted so strangely. Not even Ryujin herself. The paper suddenly felt heavy in her hands and she was overcome with the crushing weight of having lost something she could never get back.
——————
Iseul could probably pin point the exact moment he realised Ryujin was exactly where she wanted to be.
All the knights and servants of the palace were aware of Ryujin and Sayeon’s relationship. It was more difficult to not know. Perhaps Ryujin wanted it to be more secret than it truly was.
However, Sayeon never let it be that way.
She played an active part in stirring up rumours. Maybe Sayeon would slip a note to Juni that her and Ryujin were too close or touched too intimately. Regardless, to most, it was clear she wanted them to know her relationship with Ryujin. She wanted them to try and challenge her on it.
Some did. Although, Iseul rarely heard of them ever working in the palace again or, now that he came to think of it, he never heard from them at all.
Sayeon wanted it to be known. That way, it was easier to keep Ryujin to herself because who would approach the Princess’ close ‘companion’ knowing such a thing?
Even the King knew, yet he didn’t dare use it against her. Not at first anyways. He was always afraid of Sayeon, even when she was a child, anyone could see how she surpassed him in every way.
That’s what made Sayeon displaying her weakness openly so bizarre to many. Was she that confident that she could protect Ryujin? Or was there something else at play?
Strangely enough, Iseul knew he was the closest thing Ryujin had to family in the Knights and he also knew he was lucky to be deemed as such.
For, one day, he’d been granted an audience with the Princess and the topic of discussion was nothing to do with his prospects as a future Knight.
“My Knight mentioned you the other day,” Sayeon had spoke, sipping a cup of tea.
It was always ‘My Knight’ and never Ryujin’s name.
Meanwhile, Iseul had been sat across from the Princess, absolutely petrified. His palms were sweaty while his mouth ran dry. He didn’t speak yet. She hadn’t given him permission to.
Sayeon’s tea cup clacked against the plate loud enough to make Iseul jolt. She chuckled at him for that.
“I don’t bite,” she reassured with a smile so heartfelt that Iseul could feel his worries fade away.
He’d considered that the rumours of her kind facade were a lie. Perhaps she was truly a generous Princess that loved the people.
“As I was saying, My Knight mentioned you,” she started, “And I simply wish to understand what she sees in you.”
So, Iseul attempted to help her understand. He told her of his life, his aspirations and his relationship with Ryujin. She appeared to listen intently and evaluate the information he was giving her. Despite her calm exterior, Iseul couldn’t shake the feeling he was being put on trial for some unknown crime.
“Sufficed to say, Ryujin is my closest friend here. I’d trust her with my life.”
“You would?”
“Yes! She always thinks about what’s best for others and her willingness to help is something I admire.”
Sayeon seemed to ponder on that note a little longer.
“I see. Would you say you love her?” she asked with a playful tone.
Still, Iseul felt like it was far from a normal question. In fact, he felt like his well being hinged on how he answered.
Steeling himself, he returned a smile, “Of course. It’s difficult not to, isn’t it?”
Looking back, he’d considered the brief cold expression on her face was merely a trick of the light but now, perhaps it was her true feelings. Regardless, it had occurred so quickly he never had the opportunity to address it or even think about it.
“I must agree,” Sayeon eventually spoke, “Thank you for your time. You’re excused.”
With that, Iseul left. Later, he mentioned it to Ryujin who seemed disturbed and told him she’d ’sort things out’. Iseul had no idea what she meant until he just so happened to be passing the Princess’ chambers.
“He’s a good person, Sayeon!” Ryujin sounded as though she was pleading for someone.
Subconsciously, Iseul knew it was him, so he waited outside the slightly ajar door listening intently.
“Your Highness,” Sayeon corrected.
“Does it matter?”
“Titles matter. It’s why you will always be under me.”
Something told Iseul there were several layers to her words beyond simple titles.
Faltering briefly, Ryujin continued, “Look, he hasn’t done anything wrong.”
“You sound as if you’re pleading for his life,” she laughed.
“Aren’t I?”
There was a drawn out silence that made Iseul consider they’d sensed his presence and were waiting for him to leave. Curiosity got the better of him as he peeked around the corner of the door and saw the two stood, staring intently at each other. With guarded body language, Ryujin held a harsh glare towards Sayeon who held a graceful smile and almost fluttered over to her chess board by the window.
She flicked a pawn over and that glimpse of Sayeon’s glacial interior from before came to the surface.
Rolling her eyes, she let out an exasperated sigh as she explained, “Iseul is useful but of little consequence. He showed great potential as the son of a Baron that had previously trained within the palace but he’s barely progressed since he’s arrived. He’s a pawn that will never make it across the board.”
Gently, she plucked the piece she’d knocked over from the board and brought it to Ryujin, dropping it in the palm of her hand. Sayeon stayed close to Ryujin, their bodies intimately close. With even the slightest of movements, skin could brush against the other.
Sayeon grimaced, “And he loves you, apparently.”
“Yeah and I love him,” Ryujin looked up and snarled, “He’s my friend.”
Ryujin’s hand clenched the chess piece. She didn’t deter her eyes from Sayeon for a single moment.
Unable to be satisfied by mere proximity, Sayeon brushed her fingertips up the side of Ryujin’s neck before looping her finger around a single curl of her purple hair as she absentmindedly spoke, “You give out your love too easily.”
“It’s not something you give or take. It’s something that’s shared. Either with each other or the world,” Ryujin attempted to explain.
Sayeon snorted, “That’s nonsensical.”
“Love doesn’t follow a path of logic. It just is,” Ryujin shrugged, “Do you think I love you because I want to?”
Sayeon halted her hand and tucked the hair strand behind Ryujin’s ear. However, her hand lingered by her face, eventually resting on her cheek. Not tenderly but filled with a need for control. Still, Ryujin didn’t move in the slightest.
Now, Iseul knew he was encroaching on a conversation that he really shouldn’t have. He considered leaving yet he also wanted to know if he should consider running away to avoid execution.
Meanwhile, Sayeon seemed to short circuit. Her face seemed to flash through seven different phases of perplexity.
“You…don’t want to love me?”
Ryujin crossed her arms across her chest as she huffed, “You can’t even love yourself. Who the fuck would willingly want to love you?”
Sayeon’s hand moved down to Ryujin’s neck. Despite her confident grin, she shivered which, in turn, made Sayeon smile. She cooed, “And Iseul? Do you want to love him?”
“I do,” Ryujin answered swiftly, “That make you jealous?”
“Of course not.”
Sayeon answered a second too quickly and they both knew it.
The Princess groaned, conceding, and placed her forehead on Ryujin’s shoulder. As she whispered something to her, Ryujin’s silver eyes shot right towards Iseul in the doorway. She didn’t appear surprised. She just calmly mouthed the word ”Leave”. Simultaneously, Sayeon turned her head revealing a frightening glare as her free hand slid up Ryujin’s hip.
They seemed the perfect King and Queen.
Iseul froze. Was this right? He’d known their relationship was more than friends but this didn’t even feel like lovers. It felt like some secret third thing only they understood.
He heard Sayeon grumble, “I’m done waiting,” before biting into Ryujin’s neck.
Finally, Iseul’s fight or flight kicked in and he closed the doors in a panic.
When Ryujin and Iseul saw each other again, they didn’t speak of what had happened. He’d like to say it was the last time something like that happened but it was far from it.
Ryujin was more than capable of calling out Sayeon, in fact, she did so on frequent occasion in both public and private. However, equally, she never left. She was a like a rat running back into a cheese trap over and over again. She wasn’t expecting different results or even un-poisoned cheese, she was returning for the thrill of seeing how she could worm herself out the trap this time.
Whatever fucked up game those two were playing, it was far from as one sided as they had people to believe. Ryujin had the future King at her beck and call.
In Iseul’s opinion, when people spoke of how great a ruler Sayeon would be, he’d have to reflect on the possibility that Sayeon could easily be most despicable King they’d ever had if she took Ryujin as her Queen.
True power was when you have your weakness on full display like fish bait, teasing for a catch, but no one dares move against you because even if they’re successful in exploiting that weakness, they’ll have lost. When the consequences of exploiting someone’s weakness outweigh what you can gain then…that’s not truly a weakness.
That’s a bomb waiting to be probed by a King shaped fool.
——————
The weeks leading up to the wedding were…certainly a lot. The King had never bothered Ryujin so much and her contact with her husband to be was minimal. He was as uninterested in Ryujin as she was in him. At least they had one thing in common.
That night, Ryujin wasn’t sure what possessed her to wander the palace hallways. A mix of hope and anticipation for something to happen, to change. Perhaps it was just dread for her wedding the following day.
She’d heard about last minute jitters however, due to her lack of interest in the man, she figured she’d be immune to such a thing. Apparently not. Instead, she was flooded with the lingering desire to run away from it all and save Yesol, her family and save Sayeon from herself.
It was plenty of wishful thinking to prevent her from sleeping.
Thus, she took a match, lit a lamp and started to walk. Her destination was as unknown as the end of each corridor. The flicker of the fire bounced off the walls and lurched over her as if seeking entertainment from her suffering. Ryujin knew her life was far from her own. It had always been dictated by someone else in some way. Even the clothes on her back weren’t hers.
Her garment, a less than flattering nightgown that yellowed with age, and a shawl, older than she was, that she clutched tight to her chest. Nothing protected her feet from the coarse carpet laying the ground. Although, she felt the difference beneath her as she began to reach the more upper class areas of the palace.
Ryujin considered that she’d passed Sayeon’s room but it was impossible to tell now that no guards watched her door at night. Then again, a familiar face made her reconsider. She slowed her pace as she lifted the lamp to illuminate a painting on the wall. The shadows curved around her figure as if familiar with her personally.
A woman with short, spindly, dark hair sat proudly with a smile. She was adorned with a fine fur coat and crimson red garments Ryujin had spent her childhood dreaming of. Her eyes were uncannily wide and momentarily was Ryujin convinced the painting was acknowledging her in particular. A small plaque at the bottom read “Samin Lee - First Princess.”
It’s not that Ryujin didn’t know who she was, it was more so she was afraid of how her presence lingered in a Kingdom she’d abandoned haphazardly. She’d wanted to build a Kingdom on her own and so she did. However, Sayeon was too young to take over after both their parents died so the current King had stepped in as a proxy until further notice. It was supposed to be temporary but not many people could let go of power once they’ve gained a taste of it.
Sayeon should have been made King when she was eighteen. She was almost twenty now.
“I do hope you look at me that intently,” a voice arose from the darkness.
Ryujin twirled around to see Sayeon emerge in a pristine white nightgown with her arms behind her back. Despite her inherent regal nature, the pitch black of the corridors seemed to meld into Sayeon’s very being. It was as if it had temporarily released her from her natural habitat to play pretend in a fleshy cage.
Sayeon inched forward in one fluid movement, “Getting cold feet?”
A shiver prickled up her back, Ryujin was sure it wasn’t from the chill of the corridors. Placing her lantern on the table in front of Samin’s portrait, she avoided Sayeon’s calculating gaze.
“No,” Ryujin forced herself to say, “Do you always wander the halls at night?”
“Just when I’m looking for you,” Sayeon hummed.
Similar to a predator, Sayeon circled Ryujin who turned with her.
“I’m only down the corridor now,” Ryujin pointed out.
Abruptly, Sayeon slammed Ryujin against the table. The lantern’s flame flickered causing the shadows of the walls to sway. Simultaneously, that same flame was reflected in Sayeon’s eyes.
“Be careful- you’ll catch the whole place on fire!” Ryujin barked, reaching her arm out to stabilise the lantern.
Unfortunately, her hand never reached the lantern as Sayeon grabbed her wrist and held it above her head and used it to arch her further over the table. Her free hand naturally went to clutch Sayeon’s shoulder as she felt Sayeon’s leg slide between her thighs.
“What did I do wrong? I don’t understand,” Sayeon breathed out, half hysterical.
She’d seen Sayeon torment herself about a lot of things and losing was certainly up there for her. Nevertheless, this was beyond just losing something. This had created an insanity in her eyes where weeks of insomnia and obsession over failure had all caught up to her the night before her failure would be on full display.
Ryujin hadn’t noticed before but those red puffy eyes from that day had only deepened into dark circles. Sayeon was at some sort of breaking point and Ryujin wasn’t sure she could stop it.
She could feel the tremble in her hand as she held her wrist, she could hear the lump building in her throat. Sayeon needed Ryujin more than she was willing to admit and that facade was now crumbling before Ryujin’s very eyes.
Using as much strength as she could, Ryujin pushed Sayeon back. She didn’t resist it as she swayed backwards.
“Just get off! You’re not thinking right.”
Sayeon looked up with this cruel gleam in her eyes as she cocked her head to the side. “What? It’s not as if you’re saving yourself for marriage.”
“Do not go there,” Ryujin scowled, “I’m not going to sleep with him.”
Sayeon laughed, a coarse and bitter laugh, “Your duties as his wife would demand you do much more than that.”
Turning away, Ryujin secured the lander that had swayed. Her hand skimmed over the flame. Her words came out unconvincingly, “They can’t make me.”
Perhaps growing more impatient with Ryujin, Sayeon spun her back around to face her as she sought to make Ryujin see the most logical path forward. For Ryujin, that path involved too much sacrifice
“As per usual, you haven’t thought this through,” Sayeon held Ryujin’s shoulders, her voice wobbled and Ryujin was sure she saw tears welling in her eyes, “You can’t see the long term of this because you’re so focused on saving that traitor!”
“Her name is Yesol-“
“I don’t care who she is. I care that she’s taking you from me!” Sayeon was practically screaming as tears trickled down her face. Ashamed, she tried to bury her face in Ryujin’s chest but that just allowed Ryujin to feel the reverberation of every sob against her skin. Ryujin held her breath and prayed Sayeon couldn’t hear how fast her heart raced at the sound of her whimpering, “You’d have none of these issues if you married me. I wouldn’t ask of anything from you again. All I’d ask is that you stay. Stay with me. I can’t lose in such a pathetic way.”
Quivering beneath her, Sayeon clenched Ryujin’s sides strong enough to think she was about to die in front of her. The sounds and sensations of her cries against Ryujin’s chest made every part of her stiffen. It burned to her core and she liked it much more than she knew she should.
She looked up at Ryujin with swollen and pathetic eyes, needing her reassurance. Her tear stained cheeks and heavy breathing far surpassed any form of temptation for her.
Suppressing any whims she may have had, Ryujin exhaled, “…Your Highness-“
“Sayeon. Call me Sayeon, please,” her voice croaked.
“Sayeon. Crying isn’t going to convince me to change my mind,” Ryujin whispered as she brushed her finger under Sayeon’s eyelashes, catching the droplets on the end of her fingers.
In all honesty, Ryujin wavered at the sight of Sayeon’s wet puffy eyes. Actually, she more than wavered. Seeing her look so miserable because of her elicited a level of ecstasy she wasn’t expecting. Would it be wrong of her to say she looked best when she was sleep deprived and losing her mind over her?
Sayeon brushed her fingers past Ryujin’s ear as she requested, “Can I kiss you one last time?”
Looking into her eyes, Ryujin frowned, “Are you going somewhere?”
“No. Not really,” she chuckled under her breath, “Things are going to be different and…I want to remember you like this before it changes.”
Ryujin nodded, closing the distance between them. It was far from the hungry veracity she was used to with Sayeon. It felt tender and weirdly humane as Sayeon’s hands roamed up Ryujin’s back, pulling her closer.
When they eventually departed from the other, Sayeon stayed close, inhaling at Ryujin’s neck. For some time, Sayeon just seemed to admire Ryujin with this pathetically sweet grin on her face. Meanwhile, Ryujin attempted to commit her face to memory. The blue tint to her hair, the emptiness of her eyes, the slight dimple on her left cheek or the way her third finger on her right hand was slightly crooked.
“Did I ever tell you how much I admired your eyes?” Sayeon hummed, twirling Ryujin’s hair on the ends of her finger.
“You did, actually,” Ryujin admitted, “The first time you let me into your bed. You said you liked the feeling of God beneath you.”
Back then, Sayeon had looked mad and breathless with her hair sticking to her forehead as beads of sweat rolled off her cheek. She’d thought she’d never find Sayeon so attractive again as she towered over her like that. Yet, seeing her sobbing into arms about how she didn’t want to leave her had Ryujin reconsidering the kind of person she was.
“I did, didn’t I?” Sayeon giggled in a strangely genuine manner, “What an odd thing to remember.”
“It was an odder thing to say.”
“Didn’t appear to deter you,” Sayeon pointed out, her hands wandering lower.
Ryujin felt Sayeon’s fingers circle her thighs, vaguely increasing the pressure as she pleased. It was maddening to her that they’d seen every part of other, done almost anything a person could do to another and still these small touches had a way of wiring Ryujin’s brain into overdrive.
“By then, I knew what I’d signed up for,” Ryujin groaned, “A classic deal with the devil.”
Sayeon’s gaze sharpened and Ryujin could see her shift back to her plotting mind. She pressed her forehead against Ryujin with an almost giddy smile, “And if that devil wanted to make one more deal- what then?”
Shaking her head, Ryujin wheezed, “You can’t stop this now.”
“But if I could.”
“Look, if you found a way to save Yesol and the others then you’d have my soul, my body, my mind. Everything. It’d be yours.”
Sayeon’s eyes widened as she spoke excitedly, “You’ll stay true to that?”
“I suppose…?” Ryujin gave a wary smile.
“Perfect,” Sayeon cupped Ryujin’s face, planting one final momentary kiss on her lips before stepping back, “That’s all I needed to hear.”
Swiftly, Sayeon turned towards the dark corridor she’d emerged from. She was leaving again. This time, for some reason, it felt more final than before.
“Sayeon!” Ryujin called out.
The darkness seemed to shift, attempting to decipher Sayeon from the pitch black was an impossible task. It waited a moment. It waited for Ryujin.
“I’ll miss you.”
“It’s only temporary,” the void seemed to respond.
She didn’t hear Sayeon walk away but she felt her presence vanquish. Nevertheless, she held her breath in hope she’d return. Momentarily, she returned her gaze to Samin. She was judgemental in a silently cruel way.
When Ryujin realised she was truly alone, she picked up the lantern and blew out the flame. She had a feeling she’d have to start getting comfortable with the empty darkness.
——————
“Is everything ready?” Sayeon asked, staring at the suit laid out on her bed.
Predominantly, the suit was black with a red undershirt that had billowy sleeves that fell to her elbows (she’d be wearing gloves anyways). The waistcoat had a snug waistline that was contrasted to the loose fitting pants.
She couldn’t change yet. There was something waiting for her first.
A few feet away, Duke Han stood, his arms poised behind his back as he wore a perfectly constructed smile.
“The Guest list is as you wish, the Knights have all been excused until the reception and Minguk is dealing with the bigger fish, as per your request,” Han reassured as he placed his hand on Sayeon’s shoulder, “The throne shall be yours.”
Rolling her head to face him, she found herself neither excited, pleased nor even nervous. After years of silently accepting that she would never sit on the throne, in a mere few weeks she had set the execution for a coup. It wasn’t nearly as hard as she’d expected it to be. Especially when the King was so sloppy.
Duke Han had been a valuable ally. However, he hadn’t come cheap, she’d known that from the start. Amongst a plethora of things, he’d wanted a seat at the Royal Council as Sayeon’s personal advisor and all access to documents relating to Godlings. She knew he’d likely seek to take the throne from her too one day, but she’d cross that dilemma when it arose.
“And the prisoner?” Sayeon begrudgingly inquired.
She did not care for Yesol but Ryujin did. As it was their wedding day, she supposed, she could allow her one nice thing. There was a possibility Yesol would attempt to convince Ryujin to leave. However, so long as Sayeon held the welfare of that orphanage the pair had grown up in over her head there would be no issues. She was happy to fund them as long as Ryujin didn’t know they existed.
“She was more than willing to co-operate once we’d enlightened her to the scope of everything,” Duke Han informed her as he revealed a slim box from his pocket.
Sayeon glanced and skeptically opened the box. Cushioned inside the box were two rings that appeared as standard or ordinary as any other ring. A golden loop with faint markings alluding to deep affection or a life long sacred bond in them.
Duke Han continued, “You understand how this works, correct?”
Sayeon nodded, picking one up to see it better in the light. The words glimmered a faint purple, bringing a small buzz to her voice, “I appreciate you finding me these. Although I must ask, how did you know where to find them?”
She placed the ring back into its cushioned case. Sliding the lid back over the rings, Sayeon noticed how his right hand bore an eerily similar design to the rings she’d just seen.
“The only difference between us is age, Your Majesty,” Duke Han asserted.
“Perfect. Then, we can proceed as planned,” Sayeon murmured, twirling her hair, “I have business to attend to before the ceremony. You needn’t wait for me.”
Brushing past him, she waited at the door and looked over the man once more. He was right. It was as if peering into her future. Gently, he placed the box by her clothing and seemed to analyse her sense of fashion as Sayeon analysed him as a person.
Duke Han, perhaps noticing her lingering, gave a shallow remark, “I do look forward to our partnership.”
“As do I,” Sayeon returned, her words equally as empty.
——————
Today would be the worst day of Ryujin Kang’s life. Her wedding to a man that distantly loathed her as the one she pathetically loved would be forced to watch. Being attended to by a group of strangers hardly calmed her nerves either.
Well, except for one face, Juni.
“God, your hair is knotty, Y’know that?” Juni grumbled complaints despite how exceptionally careful she was being with Ryujin’s hair.
Ryujin looked to the floor, exhaling, “It doesn’t need to look beautiful. Just make it bearable for the eyes.”
“Are you kidding?” Juni exclaimed, grabbing Ryujin’s shoulders to look at herself in the mirror, “You’re the bride! You’re supposed to be the reason people kill.”
Juni’s light hearted nature had a way of getting to Ryujin. Even now, she felt herself obligated to smile at her dumb remarks. Her words were shallow, maybe blank encouragements at best. Still, Ryujin needed her words more than she was willing to admit.
Seeing herself didn’t ease any of her fears nor did the rather bitter winds stirring outside her window. Wind whistled through the cracks in the windows structure as the rustle of leaves outside dominated her ears. The weather had randomly taken a turn for the worse just last night. Knights training gear had been flung about the palace grounds and for a second, Ryujin hoped they’d cancel the wedding. Of course, they didn’t.
“Alright, alright. Just be quick,” Ryujin huffed, suppressing her brief relaxation.
Once Juni and the other maids were done, they silently retreated to attend to other duties. Ryujin suspected they’d be dressing Sayeon or the King, although she wouldn’t wish such misfortune work on anyone.
Looking at herself in the mirror felt inherently wrong. Her long purple curls were tied half up half down, twisted around the back of her head where it was held by a flower pin. The entirety of her head was covered by a semi-transparent veil and her face looked so clean. They’d spared no detail on a wedding endorsed by the King. She was used to seeing her scars or her face being rough from training but now she looked as gorgeous as those paintings she had seen in the hallways of the palace.
“You look wonderful,” a voice spoke from behind her.
She turned to see Iseul and felt her shoulders relax. His smile was sincere but he could see her hesitation. After he’d dismissed the other servants, he picked up a small tray of lip gloss and dabbed it on his fingers. He was so precise and gentle that she’d wished he’d dressed her entirely this morning instead of getting strung around by maids.
He hummed as he ran his finger across Ryujin’s lips, “You needn’t be so nervous.”
“I’m not nervous,” Ryujin forced out, her hands tightening in her lap.
Unconvinced, he nodded. Then, he said something she didn’t expect, “I understand you’d much rather be marrying someone else?”
Her eyes widened as he paused his fingers at her lips and looked up to see her rather shocked expression. A pitiful smile spread across his face.
“You…“
She tried to ask him how much he understood of her situation but she wasn’t sure she wanted to hear his answer.
“Ryujin,” he sighed, full of affection, “You didn’t think I’d forgotten that day, did you? You were always so painfully gentle with her. Even if you loathed those feelings, you truly loved her.”
The past tense of ‘loved’ stung a little. Iseul had always been with her all these years. He was by far her closest friend and companion. Briefly, he held her face and left a kiss on her forehead. Slowly, he pulled away but Ryujin wrapped her arms around his torso and hugged him tightly.
“Just tell me I’m doing the right thing. Please,” she pleaded with him.
His hand fell to the top of her head as she felt his words burn from his chest, “You’re doing the right thing, Ryujin. She’ll find someone else.”
Ryujin hoped that was true. Still, she knew it wasn’t. Sayeon didn’t let her chess pieces go very easily.
“You and Min should leave,” Ryujin said, looking at herself once more in the mirror, “It’s not safe for you. You can’t be there when…”
“When?” Iseul kneeled in front of Ryujin, his concern evident.
Ryujin scratched at her neck as she muttered, “I don’t know. I just have a bad feeling. Sayeon scares me most when she appears to have given up.”
“How come?”
“Because Sayeon doesn’t give up on anything,” Ryujin replied, “Especially once she’s decided it’s hers.”
——————
Entering the King’s chambers, Sayeon took note of Ryujin’s sword that was leant against the table that separated her from the King who was being clamoured by servants readying him. He was always adorned with the most glimmering of jewels and finest of cloth. Still, even that was not enough to satisfy him. His greed knew no bounds which had never interfered with Sayeon before, thus she was often obliged to sit back and observe him take.
Sayeon herself never asked for much. Never took what she had not earned. Never spoken out of turn. Never attempted to covet what was not hers. She was the perfect heir for the throne. A docile, insignificant but vital figure. Nonetheless, he perceived her as a threat and took frequent opportunities to undermine her.
With this diminished presence, she remained closer to a pet than a royal family member. Regardless, a faction built behind her as her intelligence overwhelmed where the King lacked, especially as a proxy. Even then, she did not interfere or pursue the throne. She only ever advised. Never demanded. Never took.
Much to her frustration, this kindness had not been returned. The only thing she had ever asked of the King was that Knight. One measly person that had initially been dumped on her as a way of mocking her had become of value to her. She hadn’t planned for that. However, plans could be adapted. Things could be changed.
Sayeon calmly announced her presence, “Your Majesty, may I have a word privately?”
He seemed to evaluate whether this was worth his time as he squinted, looking her up and down.
“It will only be brief,” Sayeon assured.
Hearing this, he nodded and quickly dismissed all the servants. One stood out, a woman with purple pigtails and an eyepatch. She nodded knowingly as she brushed past Sayeon, leaving them alone with no witnesses. He turned his gaze back to the mirror as he admired himself. Sayeon would not miss his blatant narcissism.
“Your Majesty,” Sayeon spoke, her words graceful and her smile light as she curtsied.
“My dear,” the King smiled and indicated for her to lift herself from her position, “What is it you seek?”
“Well, of course,” Sayeon’s smile didn’t so much as falter. In fact, it grew wider as her words pierced through, “I desire my Knight to be returned to me.”
The King paused and looked over his shoulder, laughing, “Surely you jest. You permitted her this marriage.”
“I’ve changed my mind,” Sayeon spoke, straining a smile.
The King waved his hand, “She is to be married in the coming moments! Besides, would you deny your old Knight such happiness?”
His attempt at ignorance was almost insulting to her.
Sayeon’s happiness lied somewhere in that flesh and bone that he was about to hand over to a less than worthy human. He would gain all that Sayeon had lost and for what? Because he happened to be in the right place at the right time.
Never before had Sayeon wanted anything. She was happy to play the role of Princess. She was happy to be King should the day ever arise. She was happy to play the fool while the King sat on his throne making reckless decisions. She was happy. She was content. She didn’t want anything. She never had.
Until, she did. No, it was beyond that now. It was an insistent need. A desire beyond her comprehension that had settled in her psyche the day Ryujin had hit her. Anybody would have executed her but Sayeon admired her audacity. That admiration was quick to spiral into a hunger that not even the King could’ve foretold.
An inherent desire to consume every inch of her being. Then again, Gluttony was a sin as much as Greed was. Perhaps they were more alike than Sayeon had given them credit for.
Such a line of thought would not change Sayeon’s decision now.
“I figured you would say that,” her voice iced over in a matter of seconds as she emerged the other side of the table, the sword limp in her hand.
Catching a glimpse of it in the mirror, it gleamed with murderous intent shared in Sayeon’s eyes. Confused, he turned to her and when she did not stop her approach he began to back away with a nervous laugh. Once he realised what was happening, he tried to flee but by then it was far too late.
The fool’s attempt at survival was short lived as Sayeon found her vision blurred entirely red. Slicing people’s arteries was always such a messy thing. Taking off her glasses she wiped them clean against her dress as the King choked mere feet away from her. His attempt to beg for his life was much more amusing to watch.
Clawing at her dress, he made gargled pleadings for his life with tears in his eyes. Guilt should have settled in by now yet she couldn’t find a morsel in her body even as she saw the strongest man in the Empire crumble at her feet. Actually, the whole ordeal was rather thrilling. If she’d known he was so easy to kill, she would have done so years ago.
Although, it wouldn’t have been possible had she not fired all those knights. Being a ‘spoiled’ Princess came with its perks sometimes. Especially when a King views your actions as a tantrum rather than a strategic attempt to weaken his defences. Not to mention how she had seamlessly isolated him from his advisors. It was all humorously easy.
“I’ll send your best wishes to the bride,” Sayeon spoke as she lifted the sword above his bloodied face and plunged it mercilessly downward.
——————
Approaching the doors that would open to the wedding ceremony could only be described as walking straight into a fire. With each stride forward she could feel the pressure beneath her seek to swallow her whole. Ryujin clutched a bouquet of flowers, for she could do nothing else. She hated these flowers. She hated this veil over her face. She…didn’t mind the dress but she hated that she even had to wear it.
There would be plenty of time to regret this later. For now, she just had to get it over with. Once she finally reached the doors, she was surprised to see no guards outside. She didn’t dwell on it as they had been understaffed with Sayeon firing them all.
Still, what truly frightened her was the silence on the other side. Whether people cared about who she was or not, they’d still be chatting before the ceremony started. In fact, she hadn’t heard a single sound the entire walk there.
Finally, the doors opened and Ryujin gave her eyes a second to adjust to the blinding lights of the hall. To her surprise, the first thing she saw was-
“Yesol?” Ryujin gasped.
“Ryujin!”
In an instant, she dropped her bouquet and rushed forward. Those were all the words expressed before they were in each other’s embrace. Ryujin’s hands dug into the fabric on Yesol’s back as she squeezed her eyes tightly shut, not wanting what was could only be a dream to end.
Still, it felt so real. Her warmth, her reassuring whispers and the sound of her heart pounding against her ears, all felt undoubtedly real. Yet, it couldn’t be, could it? The King would never allow such a thing.
In order to confirm, Ryujin pulled her head back and started frantically checking Yesol. Her skin was rough and her eyes were full of life. Her nervous laugh got stuck in her throat as she stroked Ryujin’s hair and admired her fully. Lifting the veil, Yesol cupped her face and kissed her cheek, pulling Ryujin into a tighter embrace.
She was very, very real.
Ryujin could barely find the words as she bumbled out, “What- How?!”
“You can thank your King,” she laughed, evidently relieved.
That didn’t sound right. The King would never do such a selfless thing.
Suddenly, Ryujin’s sense were overcome with the stench of death that dominated the hall. She’d been so glad to see Yesol she hadn’t even noticed the stench. When she looked past Yesol, she understood why.
A massacre would be the most apt description for what she saw.
From wall to wall blood had been splattered like an artistic display of death. The metallic fresh scent of blood overwhelmed any form of floral scents that had been dosed in preparation. There appeared to be more dead guests than alive. Those that were alive were either quivering in a corner with their hands clasped together or sat at a table, raising their glass to Ryujin’s appearance.
One man stood out to her, he stood and applauded upon seeing her. With blue rimmed glasses and the fakest smile she’d ever seen, Ryujin thought that man may have been Sayeon at first glance. A man with distinct blonde hair, seemingly unamused, to his left followed his lead. Soon, there was a hesitant applause at the arrival of the Bride.
A little further from her sight was the King, upon on the dais seated comfortably on their throne. Not the one she was used to though. They raised their hand and silence fell across the hall once more.
They watched Ryujin intently with a playful smile as they twirled the crown on their fingertips. A silver sword was leant against the throne, although, it was impossible to decipher where the blood ended and sword began. Their clothes, an extravagant black suit fitted for a funeral, was adorned with blood. Ryujin tried to ignore how their eyes lit up upon seeing her.
It appeared Sayeon Lee was King now and there was no one left to oppose her.
Sayeon indicated to (what was left) of the orchestra to start playing and with shaky fingers, they played. The harmonies were all overlapping in the wrong places as notes clashed and created a disjointed melody. She rose from her throne, a crown in one hand and, to Ryujin’s disgust, the severed head of the previous Monarch in the other. Carelessly, she held him from the ends of his hair as blood slowly dripped from the stem of his neck.
Covering her mouth, Ryujin swallowed her nausea. She’d seen bloodbaths before. It had been her friends and family then but now it was a room full of people she despised. She should have been rejoicing. Maybe it was the image of Sayeon looking to her expectantly that made her sure this bloodbath was far from over.
Ryujin took a few steps in front of Yesol who grabbed her wrist.
Her expression was calm but Ryujin had known her long enough to see the twitch of anxiety in the corner of her eye as she cautioned Ryujin, “Hey. Don’t do anything rash. That woman is-“
“Bad shit insane? I know.”
Weirdly enough, she could barely stop herself from running to her if not for Yesol’s firm grip.
The next sound she heard was the thud of the old King’s head toppling down the steps that led up to the throne. The music screeched before cutting off entirely as one of the orchestra clearly couldn’t stomach the sight anymore. All that could be heard was the people’s whimpers and gags at the sight.
“I didn’t say you could stop,” Sayeon remarked yet the threat was clear. They continued playing at her command.
Meanwhile, Yesol and Ryujin exchanged a look that screamed they needed to run. Logically, she should. However, it’d be hypocritical of her to follow what logic was telling her now.
After giving Yesol’s hand a reassuring squeeze, Ryujin forced some semblance of a smile. Hesitantly, Yesol released Ryujin as she made her way towards the head. It rolled and rolled until Ryujin met it halfway up the aisle. She grimaced upon seeing his face. She could tell he’d been crying in his final moments.
“Do you like my wedding present?” Sayeon hummed as she strolled forward, planting the crown loosely on Ryujin’s head, “I must say, I’ve truly out done myself with decorating.”
Her lack of regard for what she’d done was astonishing. Sayeon was cold hearted but this? This beyond that in every way.
Lifting Ryujin’s hand, Sayeon placed a kiss on her knuckles. Ryujin bit her lip upon feeling the wet blood seep into her skin, its warmth indicating just how fresh the death was.
“The dress looks as good as I’d expected it to be,” Sayeon commented as she spun Ryujin on the spot. She was taking in every inch of her body carefully and she was exceptionally pleased with herself.
“Sayeon,” Ryujin steadied herself, “What did you do?”
“Exactly what needed to be done,” Sayeon replied with a glossy smile, “May I have your first dance?”
Ryujin glanced back over her shoulder to see Yesol on guard with gritted teeth. She wasn’t someone that hesitated around danger. She’d strike down Sayeon immediately if she felt the need to but she hadn’t.
Her eyes narrowed as she asked, “What did you do to Yesol?”
“Nothing. She is simply indebted to me now,” Sayeon guided Ryujin to the centre of the room, “She won’t disturb us if that is your concern.”
The two bowed to each other as if there weren’t a hoard of bodies piled around them. Despite her minimal movement, the ends of Ryujin’s dress were already stained crimson. Every bloodied hand print on her body, from her hips to her hands, was a mark from Sayeon herself. Plus with how she reinforced her grip, she wanted it to be known Ryujin was her bride.
“I’m more concerned that you’ve committed regicide!” Ryujin whispered harshly. She wasn’t sure who she was whispering for.
Sayeon snorted as they began to fall into step with one another, “Do you think whispering it lessens the truth?”
Ryujin was completely stunned at her nonchalance to the whole thing. It was as if she’d completely lost the ability to see sense. Pulling Ryujin closer, their bodies clashed against each other while Ryujin’s glare was met with a wicked smirk.
Furrowing her brows, Ryujin couldn’t help but ask, “Iseul and Min. Are they-“
“Safe. They still hold value to me,” Sayeon answered as she twirled Ryujin around the floor, the blood getting flicked up onto her dress as she went.
“How did you…do all of this?” Ryujin breathed out as her feet briefly stuck to the floor.
Abruptly, Sayeon dropped Ryujin, mere inches from the ground. The crown clattered to floor, splashing into a pool of red. With a hum, Sayeon said, “I had a little help.”
Perhaps Ryujin hadn’t noticed before, perhaps she hadn’t wanted to but her eyes were no longer the dark bottomless pools she was used to. They were ringed.
As soon as the realisation hit Ryujin, Sayeon pulled her up and continued to dance with a satisfied smile.
Aghast, Ryujin hissed, “You made a deal with a Godling?”
“No. The Godling made a deal with me and it was under strict conditions,” Sayeon explained calmly.
“Which were?” Ryujin pressed, stumbling over her feet as she was evidently distracted by Sayeon making a deal with what was practically a God.
“One of the conditions was that I couldn’t say,” Sayeon dramatically sighed as she turned Ryujin so that her back was against Sayeon’s chest.
Rolling her eyes, Ryujin shifted uncomfortably against her and scoffed, “Of course-“
“But I can make an exception for you,” Sayeon purred, her breath burned against Ryujn’s ears, “After all, you’re the exception to it all.”
Coquettishly, Sayeon rested her chin on Ryujin’s shoulder. She seemed almost excited to share it with her. Glancing at Sayeon, she noted how the ringed eyes suited her well. Well, in the same way Alice suited Wonderland. Utter madness and discord.
“Then…?”
“In exchange for my humanity, I gained the ability to…fix things,” Sayeon mused, her arms wrapping around Ryujin’s waist, “Unfortunately, I can’t tell you the details of that ability but it doesn’t truly matter.”
Sayeon continued with the same matter of fact attitude, “So, I planned to make you my Queen which couldn’t work so long as that fiancé was around. Thus, I got rid of him too.”
Ryujin hadn’t even considered what had happened to him until that moment. Subconsciously, she assumed he was piled somewhere in this room. Although, that image was far from pleasant.
Swallowing the growing lump in her throat, Ryujin questioned, “What happened to him?”
“I gave him the option of duelling me or taking a vile of poison,” Sayeon shrugged, “Ultimately, he took the cowards way out.”
Snorting a little too quickly, Ryujin found herself letting out a hysterical laugh. Every time she opened her mouth Sayeon appeared to become more detached from reality and Ryujin found herself struggling to decipher the ever changing hieroglyphics of her mind.
If there was an emotion between baffled, disgusted and weirdly attracted, then Ryujin was there.
Pushing Sayeon off her, Ryujin scowled, “You’re insane.”
“No,” Sayeon insisted, straightening her posture, “I am thinking perfectly clear.”
Ryujin couldn’t even begin to imagine how she said that with a straight face. All she could do was yell at her to see the sheer insanity of it all. “You’ve just murdered all the guests at the wedding! How is that sane?!”
“Only three quarters of the guests are dead,” Sayeon corrected, “And I didn’t kill them all myself. I had assistance from the faction supporting my claim to the throne.”
That explained the Sayeon double from earlier. Only a duplicate of herself could find the sanity in whatever this was. Every single one of the people left was plagued with the domination of ruin around them. Perhaps the odour of death had started getting to Ryujin’s brain as she felt it all spiralling away from her.
Did she want to scream at Sayeon for doing all this in her name or thank her for saving her and Yesol from a hellish situation? She couldn’t know all those people deserved to die but she trusted Sayeon’s objective moral judgement. Sometimes. It wasn’t as intact as it should be.
“I don’t understand,” Ryujin buried her face in her hands, “Why do all this?”
“Because I loved you,” Sayeon breathed out, “It was an unfortunate feeling and I had to dispose of it.”
Lifting her head, Ryujin saw the same expression from that night in the hallway. Sheer pain and torment over herself. Sayeon couldn’t even love herself. Ryujin could never expect her to understand the complexities of loving another person. Not without resenting herself until the end of time.
The past tense of her words really stung this time. She thought back to that night and how she’d spoke of things ‘changing’. She’d assumed she’d heard how she’d be departing soon after the ceremony. The vagueness of her words made sense now.
A part of her was struck with the realisation that without her humanity, Sayeon couldn’t possibly feel anything for Ryujin now. The question left her lips with a heavy weight of uncertainty at the response, “Then, what use am I to you anymore?”
“A King is defenceless without its Queen. I still need you.”
Those were the words that broke Ryujin. The fact that, after everything, it all played out as a strategy, a game to her. She was half-laughing as she found herself disgustingly close to tears. She’d risked whatever dignity she had left to marry a stranger and it had all been futile. Sayeon had loved her but instead of facing it she squashed the feeling entirely.
It was idiotic but it was exactly the woman she’d fallen in love with.
Someone who would die before facing their feelings because that meant acknowledging there was a deeper care. Beyond strategy or logical necessity. No, Sayeon would have to acknowledge she desired Ryujin and why would she do that when she could just claim her like an object instead?
“Ryujin,” Sayeon spoke, lifting her face and wiping her thumb under her eye, “You’ll ruin your makeup.”
She’d done more damage as she smeared blood into her tears.
Her voice strained in frustration? Bitterness? She wasn’t sure. She just demanded to know, “What am I supposed to do?”
“Stay and die with me,” Sayeon asked and she was definitely not commanding. In fact, she was begging, “Please.”
“What reason do I possibly have to stay now?” Ryujin scoffed as she took a step back.
Sayeon looked as weak as a kicked puppy as she held onto the ends of Ryujin’s fingertips. “Am I not sufficient enough reason?”
With a little resistance, Ryujin pulled her hand away as she considered her offer, “That’s-“
In a moment, Sayeon had fallen to her knees and clung to Ryujin, dragging marks with blood Sayeon had spilled for her down her dress. She looked so pathetic.
How cruel. Sayeon may not have realised it but that Godling had lied to her. It hadn’t taken away all her humanity. It had left just enough for her to torment herself with the lingering remnants of her feelings. It was all the more amusing for it that way after all. Maybe subconsciously Sayeon knew that, but Ryujin knew the truth nonetheless.
“Please,” she muffled into the dress.
Something about Sayeon begging without hesitation in front of a hall full of people that either feared her or supported her, because the mere prospect of Ryujin leaving was too much for her, had a way of making her throat run dry. Looking down was a greater mistake as she was met with glassy and very needy eyes staring back.
“Well, fuck me,” Ryujin muttered to herself.
Sayeon’s intense gaze below her eyelashes was far from patient. She wanted an answer and her increasingly tighter grip was making the decision faster than Ryujin could.
What was she supposed to say? No? Sayeon was risking every bit of respect she’d built in her treacherous display today just to make Ryujin stay. To most, they’d think Sayeon’s begging shallow. To Ryujin, it was exactly what she needed.
Regardless, what kind of life could Ryujin have if she left? She could run away with Yesol but Sayeon wouldn’t let that happen easily nor would the Begonia Group allow such a thing either.
Perhaps she could return to her life as a Knight but what use would that be to her now? The other Knights would know about today. They’d hate her and even if they never took action against her, she would still have to live under Sayeon’s thumb, likely in a worse position than she had been to begin with.
Even running away solo wasn’t plausible. She’d never forgive herself for abandoning Yesol. Besides what place would willing hide Ryujin if they knew the King wanted her.
Sayeon’s rough grasp returned Ryujin to her hopeful gaze at the waist of her dress. She didn’t really have any other way out, did she? She had to stay with Sayeon. It didn’t sound terrible, after all, despite everything, she did love her.
Besides, if she had the King at her disposal then wasn’t she free to do whatever she wished? God, now she was thinking like Sayeon too.
In hopes of erasing the image of Sayeon before her, Ryujin closed her eyes, however, she found her imagination was much more vivid than the reality. So, she settled on keeping her eyes open. As a compromise, she rested her hand over Sayeon’s eyes. Instantly, Ryujin could feel Sayeon’s mouth curve upward in triumph.
“You’ll stay?” Sayeon reaffirmed.
“Don’t,” she spoke with a tight throat, “Let it get to your head. It benefits us both.”
Leaping to her feet, Sayeon beamed at Ryujin, holding her hands tight as she said, “So, you’ll marry me?”
Ryujin paused, stunned, she started, “Now?”
“It’s practical while everything is ready,” Sayeon explained, “Wouldn’t you agree?”
Ah. So, that had been her angle? Why did Ryujin expect anything less. She’d already made a deal with the devil. So marrying said devil was the natural next step to her life wasn’t it? A part of her was concerned with how eager Sayeon was to do the whole thing.
“I guess?” Ryujin grumbled.
She felt Sayeon’s hand slide down to her wrist as she tugged her closer. Briskly, Sayeon leant down and picked the crown up, now dripping with blood. Sayeon forced it into Ryujin’s hands. It took her a moment to understand what she meant.
Marrying Sayeon wasn’t going to be the same as marrying quite literally anyone else. Marrying Sayeon meant becoming Queen. Not in the metaphorical chess game she categorised the people in her life by but the actual Queen. It was a responsibility more than what she personally believed herself capable of, however, Sayeon wouldn’t have proposed this without considering Ryujin’s suitability for the throne.
She trusted her judgement, even if it was skewed to no end.
“Don’t you want to?” Sayeon whispered and a part of Ryujin wanted to believe if she said no, she’d let her go.
That was really just a dream though. All she could do was play along with Sayeon’s theatre. She has an amazing way of presenting the illusion of choice to a person.
“Are you kidding?” Ryujin scoffed, “Someone has to keep you in line and stop you killing the rest of the aristocracy.”
Sayeon nodded, looping her arm around Ryujin’s, “Mhm. Whatever you wish.”
Before they moved up the aisle, Sayeon presented one of the rings to Ryujin, placing it in her free hand. A moment of silence passed as she gawked at the ring. It wasn’t the one her (now) ex-fiancé had picked for her. Sayeon had chosen this on her own. Something about that unnerved her.
“Once this gets out, the people will turn on you,” Ryujin pointed out as they walked up the aisle.
Sayeon quirked a brow, “Why turn on me? This was divine punishment from God.”
Ryujin paused and turned to Sayeon, once more baffled by her audacity. She was going to blame the Godling that had helped her by claiming some divine possession? Not everyone would believe it, sure, but enough would for her to get everything in order and make her sequence of events the only true one.
Plus, she had the majority of the people left alive on her side. There side of events was going to be the only one that mattered. Then again, maybe Ryujin was assuming too much in thinking the general public would even find out what happened fully.
Ryujin shook her head, “There’s no way they’ll believe you.”
“I’m an excellent actress,” Sayeon smiled, “And the world is my stage. The audience claps, boos and cries when I tell them to.”
A little unnerved, Ryujin stood under the bloodied arch with Sayeon. She indicated to the crown still in Ryujin’s hands. Hesitantly, she lifted it and secured it on Sayeon’s head. The blood trickled down the inside of her nose to her lips. One droplet fell into her eye eliciting a hearty laugh from Ryujin as she watched Sayeon struggle to blink it away.
“You look stupid,” Ryujin snorted, wiping what she could with the ends of her sleeve.
Sayeon held her hand in place, planting a kiss at the wrist as she spoke, “And that’s why I’m marrying you.”
“What? Because I don’t want to fuel your ego?”
“To a degree,” Sayeon admitted, moving the same hand down and sliding the ring onto Ryujin’s finger, “It’s one of many reasons I can’t let you leave.”
Ryujin didn’t have time to question what she meant before a shooting pain fired from her finger to her hand. She felt the ring burn into her skin, latching itself onto Ryujin’s body and soul. Instinctively, she yanked it from Sayeon’s grasp.
“What the fuck did you do?”
“You promised you’d stay. I just ensured that you couldn’t change your mind once the adrenaline of this all faded.”
“I wouldn’t have changed my mind!” Ryujin barked.
“Then there’s no issues,” Sayeon murmured, lifting Ryujin’s hand gently, “All the ring does is ensure that both people wearing the pair are interlinked. Your soul, your body, your mind. Everything.”
Using her own words against her was annoying but a cheap way to get what she wanted. Technically, Ryujin had promised that. Still, she hadn’t expected Sayeon to take it so literally. Maybe it was her fault for not clarifying…Nope. This was definitely all Sayeon’s manipulation tactics. It didn’t help that she was aware if she was going straight for the trap anyways.
“So, you’ll always know what I’m doing or thinking?”
“Yes but that hardly matters. After all,” Sayeon tilted her head, her expression uncanny, “Why would you ever need to leave my sight again?”
There was a familiar possessive gleam in her eyes hidden by a genuine belief that she was doing the right thing. Sometimes, Sayeon had a way of ruining a good thing and it made Ryujin want to rip off her head.
Ryujin didn’t even care what the ring did fully. All she knew was that, Sayeon couldn’t even trust her enough to believe she’d want to marry her under any other circumstances. She clearly thought Ryujin far too impulsive and, once again, she was reminded that, despite everything, Sayeon wouldn’t ever fully trust her.
“Just give me your hand,” Ryujin demanded, her annoyance steering under the surface.
Glancing downward, Ryujin held Sayeon’s right hand, brushing her thumb over the third finger. The slight crook in it a reminder that Sayeon could be imperfect. That no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t change her inherent flaws. It brought a small smile to her face seeing how uncomfortable Sayeon got at her paying attention to it.
Bitterly, Ryujin slid the ring over Sayeon’s fourth finger and instantaneously, she watched as it seared into the skin. A sadistic exhale left Sayeon’s mouth as she saw it all actualised. It had likely been weeks of planning all for this.
All for Ryujin.
She stared at the ring on her finger, the pain numbing the longer she did. With little force, she tried probing the ring off. It didn’t budge in the slightest. It was entirely stitched into her skin. Luckily, it didn’t hurt after the initial merge.
Seeing how Sayeon had gone to such lengths just to keep her chained to her side, Ryujin found exactly the most suitable response in the reflection of that ring.
Ryujin looked up, wondering, “Are we supposed to say vows?”
“Is there something you wish to tell me?” Sayeon raised an eyebrow.
“Oh yeah, just a few things.”
A resounding slap echoed across the hall. A few people gasped upon seeing Ryujin swing across her face. Retracting her hand, she felt it throb from the impact. Not as much as she assumed it hurt Sayeon as she saw that the ring had scuffed her, a small cut emerging on her cheek.
“You’re a sick, manipulative bastard,” she cackled with a scornful undertone, “You ruin everything you touch and leave it for rot. Still, I find myself repulsively in love with you and I can’t wait to spend the rest of our miserable lives together.”
She let the sarcasm of her last few words hang in the air between them. Onlookers seemed interested in the wedding more than ever.
Rolling her eyes, Sayeon massaged her jaw with a jaded expression. Her dark eyes trailed down to Ryujin yet, as intimidating as she tried to be, Ryujin knew her enough to see how her lips twitched, suppressing a masochistic grin.
“I probably deserved that,” she murmured to herself, “My turn.”
Without a word, Sayeon lifted Ryujin’s chin to look up at her. She braced for Sayeon to retaliate but it never came. Her thumb dragged over Ryujin’s lips, smudging the pigment Iseul had applied earlier. Then, she gently pressed a kiss where she’d touched her, only briefly pulling away before returning with more ferocity.
The once gentle hold of Ryujin’s chin shifted into an unyielding grip around her face. Desperately, her hands slid up Sayeon’s chest until she’d wrapped her arms around the back of her neck. Her fingers brushed the nape of Sayeon’s neck, intertwining with her hair and producing a shiver from Sayeon.
Firmly, Sayeon’s other hand scooped around Ryujin’s thigh as she kissed her with increasing fervour. Their mouths clashed against each other in Sayeon’s frenzy to devour. The rush of blood to Ryujin’s face was instantaneous as her brain buzzed, manic with every sensation Sayeon brought her. With her chest pounding hard enough to hear nothing else, Ryujin felt herself swoon into the kiss.
Sayeon’s glasses kind of got in the way, bumping clumsily against Ryujin at times, but her desire seemed to overpower any discomfort. Ryujin’s hands slid to cup Sayeon’s face and she felt the other’s grin against her lips as she increased ferocity, leaning further into Ryujin. She could feel how Sayeon’s eyes watched her carefully, engraving every single squirm beneath her for her own enjoyment.
Eventually, Ryujin had to slap her to make space for air. Steadying herself, she could feel the air rush back into her lungs as she pulled away.
Despite that, Sayeon simply moved to kiss her jawline. Placing kisses in a strangely affectionate and intimate way, Ryujin believed for a moment that she was free until Sayeon started talking.
“You’re a crude, erratic fool,” Sayeon panted by her ear, “You’ve saved me more than I like to think and even if I never understand how you made me love you, I will spend the rest of my life chasing that understanding until death do us part.”
Her head then slinked behind her ear and down her neck, wasting no time in sucking at her skin. Each pull at her skin felt like a deliberate electrical tug to that short circuited her brain.
“Sayeon,” Ryujin suppressed a whine, “I’m not going anywhere-“
“But it’s been weeks since I’ve been able to touch you like this.”
“The people-“
“Would do nothing,” Sayeon interjected, forcing Ryujin’s head to look around the hall, “See, Ryujin? Currently, there stands no one to oppose me. No one to stop me from taking you right here if I wanted.”
Glancing around the room, Ryujin saw no one move, nor stir. No one would save her now. Not in the way she’d dreamed of as a child. She’d tried to be the Knight that rescued her loved ones but Sayeon had made her the Queen that gave out the very orders that got them killed. There was something inherently frightening about being in an open space and knowing you were trapped anyways.
None of them could even look at her, as if they knew that by sacrificing her was the lesser of two evils. The greater evil being letting Sayeon take the throne unchecked. At some point, Sayeon’s grip started to feel like a snake wrapping itself around prey before it devoured it whole. She was going to die to this woman and she wasn’t entirely sure she minded.
“Don’t say that ever. You weirdo,” Ryujin jabbed Sayeon’s stomach with her elbow, her voice somewhere between laughing and panicking.
“But I wouldn’t do such a thing. It’s far too unhygienic,” Sayeon droned on.
”Thats your concern?” Ryujin wanted to ask but found her words cut short by Sayeon returning to her lips with increasing hunger.
Her head felt dizzy with ecstasy at the constant assault on her lips. With her chest hammering in her ears, she lamented Sayeon’s name into her mouth which only seemed to fuel her and send her senses a buzz.
As with everything she did, Sayeon was ruthless and precise. She knew when to slow or let her teeth drag across Ryujin’s bottom lip a second longer to make the coming impact even more overwhelming.
She had to remind herself that the same hands that held her in place were stained with the deaths of countless around her. In a twisted act of deskre, Ryujin found she was beyond the point of care.
Sayeon had magnificently trapped her and the consequences would show themselves eventually but until then she could take pleasure in whatever this was. She could take pleasure in hearing Sayeon squirm against her as Ryujin clawed at her back through her suit. She could take pleasure in how Sayeon’s body melted into hers as if she was the last taste of water in the desert. Selfishly, Ryujin took pleasure in it all.
Opening her eyes, she looked back to see Yesol staring at her with this incredulous expression. It must’ve been strange to see Ryujin with someone like that. Equally, it must’ve been strange to watch someone who had been threatening your life, dominate what was essentially your sister. If she’d told her past self where she was now, would she believe her?
Nonetheless, Yesol could judge her for the rest of her life if she saw fit. At least she was alive to judge her in the first place. That’s what mattered to Ryujin most.
Squinting, she took one last look at Yesol before letting her hazy mind indulge entirely. That was the thing with Ryujin. Her emotions somehow always got the better of her.
——————
It was supposed to be Yesol’s execution that day- not Ryujin’s.
It was supposed to be a wedding but she was sure she’d just attended someone’s funeral.
She’d expected Ryujin to be different from her memory but this felt like a cruel joke. She’d walked herself into that death trap so confidently and then just allowed herself to be devoured. It felt wrong to watch.
The change hadn’t truly horrified her though. Yesol was braced for such a scenario. When they were children, unaware of the horrors of the future, Ryujin had always brimmed with that buzz you could only find from someone that had suffered. Someone that knew the horrors of the world and wanted to be better.
“I’ll become a Knight,” Ryujin had declared with a beaming smile that hadn’t even lost all the baby fat in her cheeks, “I’ll help lots of people and save them from those corrupt…uh. What did you call them?”
Yesol had smiled, “Bastards.”
“Yeah- those corrupt bastards!” Ryujin extended her pinky finger, “Knights promise.”
That image of Ryujin in her scuffed oversized clothing wearing a charming grin and holding nothing but a cardboard sword to guide her towards the future, was more than a distant memory. In comparison to how she stood now, her eyes exasperated, her clothes regal yet smeared in blood and her will to fight practically extinguished.
Seeing her was like watching a desolate corpse learn to reanimate itself. That was what scared Yesol most. The fact that she’d watched Ryujin walk right into a bird cage of everything she’d ever hated and Yesol had let her.
That woman, Sayeon apparently, was worse than any form of deadly sin she’d ever seen. Seeing Ryujin had been happy, briefly. Then, the looming threat that was the King made her entrance and, just like that, the Ryujin she knew was gone.
They’d spoken after the whole ceremony and, for reasons unclear to everyone else, the King had insisted on playing pretend that this was a normal wedding. So people danced with their heads held high as to not look at the desecration below.
“Is she still staring?” Ryujin casually inquired, taking a sip from a wine glass.
Yesol peered over her shoulders and saw a rather chilling glare from the King stood on the other side of the room. Based on Yesol’s recoil in the face, Ryujin sighed, “She’ll get over it. I’m just glad you’re alright…You are okay, aren’t you?”
“Yes- Of course I am, now anyways,” Yesol fumbled for her words, “But looking at your situation, you’re in a much worse position than I am.”
Ryujin tilted her head, “What are you talking about?”
“Marrying that thing!” Yesol indicated to Sayeon with a harsh whisper, “I don’t even know if you could call it human after everything.”
“Oh yeah, she’s awful. Absolute scumbag. I couldn’t have married someone worse,” Ryujin listed off every fault with this mildly amused expression as she swilled the drink in her hand.
Pausing, she frowned staring at her reflection in the dark red wine and continued, “But. She’s my wife now. I’m stuck with her as much as she’s stuck with me.”
Rightfully, Yesol pointed out, “She’s insane.”
“For me,” Ryujin placed her drink down, perhaps speaking a little too proudly, “Yesol. She’ll do anything I ask of her. Within reason, of course. I don’t think she’d abandon her desires to reform the Kingdom but I have more than enough wiggle room.”
Yesol couldn’t make sense of her tangent nor the possible implication that Ryujin actually cared for that thing. After seeing Sayeon mercilessly slaughter people, Ryujin wasn’t the slightest bit apprehensive? Heck, she sounded as if she was planning for a way to use it to her advantage. Leaving her in this palace full of trickery and deceit had truly changed her.
Shaking off that train of thought, Yesol grabbed Ryujin’s shoulders, exclaiming, “What are you even talking about? Ryujin she’s practically holding you hostage!”
“So?” she looked at Yesol with this frighteningly blank expression, “I can make things right for you and for what I did-“
“Ryujin, they’re dead and-“
“I should be too,” Ryujin’s voice wavered, her hands nervously rubbing over the ring on her finger, “Look, I’m doing this because I care about you, so for once just let me save you.”
Yesol bit her tongue at Ryujin’s words. She understood the guilt. She hadn’t even been there for it and she’d never forgiven herself. She couldn’t imagine the possible weight of being a survivor of such an attack or what she’d had to have done to be the sole survivor.
“Ryujin,” Sayeon emerged, somehow, from behind her, placing her hand on the small of her back, “Iseul wants to see you.”
“…Thanks. I’ll see you around Yesol,” Ryujin muttered, spinning on her heels and walking towards who she assumed was Iseul.
He embraced her immediately, making a fuss just as she had. It was nice to see someone cared about her normally in this place. Yesol strode forward, not quite finished with their discussion.
“We’re not done here,” Yesol reached out to grab Ryujin only to be stopped by Sayeon who raised her arm between them.
She held this unnerving yet triumphant smile.
“What?” Yesol spat.
“The rings let us know the other’s thoughts and feelings,” Sayeon needlessly explained, “Right now? She was screaming at me to get her away from you.”
She was lying, Yesol told herself she had to be. With that smug expression and prideful stance there was no way she wasn’t lying. Yet, on the slim chance she wasn’t or that she was exaggerating the truth then what would that mean?
Gritting her teeth, Yesol considered killing Sayeon there and then. She was a threat to Ryujin, even if, for whatever reason, she liked her, Yesol couldn’t stand how carelessly she’d tried to undermine their relationship.
However, the lingering threat of the kids at the orphanage and Ryujin a few dead bodies away made her simply curl her fist until her palms bled.
Sensing this thinly concealed animosity, Sayeon placed a hand on Yesol’s shoulder and spoke with a condescending grin, “Some fresh air might do you some good, hm?”
Yesol took one last look at Ryujin with her friends(?) and saw she was weakly smiling. That was enough for her. At least, for now.
Thus, on some intricately designed balcony, Yesol huffed and bemoaned how things had turned out. Leaning her elbows on the balcony’s edge, Yesol buried her face in her hands as she considered everything that had happened. She couldn’t understand what Ryujin saw in her. She couldn’t understand why she’d stay.
Whether it be for Yesol or some other desire, she couldn’t understand why she’d turned away. She didn’t fear Sayeon, out of everything, Yesol saw that to be true. Yet, she was still plagued with the thought that Sayeon was right. Did she resent Yesol for not saving her or for getting her trapped in the first place?
Ryujin wouldn’t keep that to herself though. She’s entirely too honest.
“Ryujin’s a good kid, right?” A voice chirped from behind her.
Turning, Yesol was greeted by a maid with a distinct eyepatch and blood on her apron. Not odd considering the state of the hall. The woman strolled over to her side as she attempted to light a pipe dangling from her mouth.
She quirked a brow, “You are?”
“Juni,” she responded quickly. Noticing Yesol’s stares, she asked, “You want some?”
Wrinkling her nose at the thing, Yesol said, “I’m good.”
Juni shrugged and wasted no time in lighting the thing. The fire flickered briefly before the clouds of smoke rose from the end of the device. Taking a deep exhale, the smoke swirled up into the night sky and, much to her annoyance, Yesol’s face.
Wafting the smoke away, Yesol coughed, “How do you know Ryujin?”
“I trained her for a bit,” Juni responded, pipe loosely dangling between her teeth (and Yesol was sure she was using it wrong). “She’s a slacker but she’s good.”
Processing, Yesol looked over the woman’s attire. Ryujin had been a Knight and…“…You’re a maid.”
“Yeah. I am,” Juni scoffed, proudly lifting her pipe to the sky, “And I’m fucking brilliant at my job too.”
This woman was a nut job. Heck, Yesol considered that she was just some random person that had broken in and stolen clothes from a maids corpse on the way. Still, if she had known Ryujin then Yesol was curious.
Pressing her lips together, Yesol asked the question that plagued her, “You think Ryujin will be happy?”
With her one eye, Juni squinted at Yesol answering with a flippant tone, “I don’t think Ryujin’s been happy in years. That’s why she likes the Princ- I mean, the King.”
Yeah, this woman was definitely insane. Even if Ryujin did like that woman tyrant King thing, then she’d find herself disappointed. As even from the other end of the aisle, Yesol couldn’t stand how see how she was incapable of love and Ryujin deserved so much more in her eyes.
Catching the rather blatant doubt on Yesol’s face, Juni seemed to ponder as she expanded on her previous point, “She’s a sucker for seeing the best in people, except herself. Meanwhile, the King worships the ground she walks on so long as that ground was made by herself and leads straight to King’s throne.”
Yesol still didn’t get it.
“They’re delusional hypocrites,” Juni whined upon seeing Yesol’s confusion, “They see something in the other that no one else can and want to control it because, well, they’re freaks.”
Looking over the edge into what appeared to be the abyss, Yesol was struck with an epiphany about this stranger’s words. “So, what you’re saying is they’re both doomed to chase the other in circles?”
A little surprised, Juni looked at Yesol with a smile, a genuine smile, not that fake bullshit from earlier.
“Yeah. Doomed is the right word,” Juni hummed, looking out to the skyline.
It was impossible to spot anything from this far away unless you knew what you were looking for. If this odd interaction had taught her nothing else it was that today would be remembered very differently from others perspective.
Everyone else would focus on the Tyrant King that massacred the courts but Yesol would always first recall the ghostly bride that had been sunk in blood.
——————
Staring at her hand, Ryujin admired the shine of her ring in the moonlight. The curtains bellowed behind her as the cool night air prickled at her skin beneath her nightgown. Looking over the balcony, she could see the town she’d grown up in a small spot of light in the distance. She’d told herself she’d go back one day. That felt impossible now.
As she stood in the freezing cold, she attempted to place the exact moment she’d abandoned her morals for this woman. Had it been that night in the hallway or had it been earlier? Was it the first time Sayeon saved her? Or was it the very day they met? She wasn’t entirely sure.
She’d killed so many earlier but somehow it hadn’t bothered Ryujin as much as she thought it would. Sure, she knew how despicable the aristocracy was in their endless cruelty, she’d been subjected to it her whole life. Still, perhaps she’d justified it all a little too easily.
Stretching her arms over her head, Ryujin felt Sayeon’s arms slink around her body as she nestled into the back of her shoulder blade, placing a light kiss there.
“Absolutely not,” Ryujin giggled, mildly ticklish to the contact, “My back is in agony.”
Sayeon rolled her eyes, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“I can feel how bad you want to drag me back into the bedroom,” Ryujin retorted, “These rings work both ways.”
As much as Ryujin wasn’t a fan of being given a wedding ring where Sayeon conveniently omitted the part where their bodies and souls become intertwined, she could still reap the benefits. Especially now that it was impossible for her to lie to her. It far surpassed what Ryujin’s pure intuition could tell her about Sayeon anyways.
“I want you back inside so that I know you’re safe,” Sayeon murmured. Her hand twitched a little as she pulled Ryujin closer to her. She was nervous.
Ryujin frowned, running her hand through Sayeon’s hair behind her, “Sayeon, you killed anyone that could hurt me, remember?”
“I’m not talking about others.”
Oh. She thought Ryujin was going to throw herself off the balcony. A fair assumption after the day they’d had. Ryujin had kind of planned on something like that further down the line if her married life with that man was as horrifying as she thought it may have been. Luckily for her, she married a deranged woman instead. Ultimately, the compromise seemed only mildly better for herself and exceptionally worse for everyone in their lives.
“I’m not going to die,” Ryujin assured.
“I know. I won’t let you.”
“What about if you die?”
“Thinking of killing me in my sleep?” Sayeon asked with a yawn.
Ryujin paused before answering, “I was actually.”
What? Wouldn’t you think of a way to kill someone that unpredictable and growing increasingly obsessed with you if you had the chance? Even if the fact she would do anything for Ryujin was appealing, it sounded like it came with far too much baggage and a rather traumatic full time marriage.
“Well, if you do. At least wait until I’ve fixed this retched kingdom,” Sayeon groaned, squeezing her tighter, “I can’t massacre half the courts and not do something good in turn.”
A little stunned, Ryujin tilted her head back, “You’d let me kill you?”
“Well I certainly couldn’t let it be anyone else,” she laughed as if they were talking about the most mundane topic known to man, “Just don’t be too far behind me, hm? I’ll get lonely in Hell.”
Ryujin scoffed, “You don’t believe in Hell. You think we’re already here.”
Spinning Ryujin around to face her, Sayeon droned with a pleased hum, “Yes and you’re my personal torturer.”
A brief silenced passed between them as Ryujin stared at Sayeon’s eyes. As fitting as they were, the ringed eyes unnerved her a little. A small reminder that a Godling had gotten its way into Sayeon through Ryujin. Her dark eyes made it difficult to see though, especially with how little light there was outside.
“Hey, Sayeon,” Ryujin spoke up, “Do me a favour?”
“Mhm. What is it?”
Ryujin’s head fell into Sayeon’s chest, her arms wrapping under her armpits. “When I kill you, promise you won’t fight back.”
Concisely, Sayeon planted a firm kiss on the top of Ryujin’s head. She left her mouth there so Ryujin could feel every syllable of hot air against her head.
“Only if you promise to watch the life drain from my body,” Sayeon requested with the kind of joy you’d hear from someone being given a surprise gift.
“Yeah. I will,” Ryujin exhaled, deflated as she snuggled in further.
There was never really a point in saying no to Sayeon.