Chapter Text
Why did he say that?
That sign.
Why did he leave that?
'Lost cause'
He's so stupid.
If he hadn't left that sign, maybe Wemmbu wouldn't hate him.
If he hadn't left that sign, maybe everything would be well.
Maybe if Wemmbu had just listened to him.
..Then again, he shouldn't have done all of that.
Honestly, he was just angry. He wants to apologize, he really does.
But Wemmbu probably hates him, as he should. He probably wants nothing to do with ManePear.
ManePear is laying against his bed, on the floor. It's cold. His eyes are focused on his arm.
The blade is in his hand.
Why is he doing this again? He promised himself he wouldn't relapse.
He grimaces.
His hand slowly moves towards his arm, then he feels the cold metal of the blade. It's a familiar feeling, if he's being honest.. he missed the feeling of that cold metal swiping against his arm.
One swipe equals one mistake he had done.
Then, he pressed down—
One swipe.
Why did I say that?
And then another.
Why would I even do that?
Then another.
Why am I doing this.
Another.
He feels worse than me, why am I the one doing this?
Another.
It's not like he's the one who called me a lost cause.
Just.. one more.
I don't deserve to feel this way.
Everyone else feels worse than me.
He watches the blood trickle down his arm to the floor, his ears flat from the pain—it hurt, but it felt so good —his tail limp on the ground.
He feels numb.
He should clean this up, before someone spots this mess. Especially not Flame.
He already told his little brother he wouldn't relapse, how would he react if he found Mane in such a state?
..Whatever.
ManePear stands up, and heads towards the bathroom.
Bandaging his arm up, he sighs.
If he hadn't said that, if he was softer, gentler, then maybe everything wouldn't be this way.
Wemmbu probably hates him. As he should.
..He hates this, why is he feeling this way, when Wemmbu is probably feeling worse because of him? He doesn't deserve to feel sad. He's the one who caused Wemmbu to feel like that.
...
He finishes wrapping the bandages, and stays on the floor—still resting his back against his bed.
He wants to apologize, but.. Wemmbu probably won't even look at him.
Mane hides the blade under the bed.
There's no one here to comfort him, anyway. It's useless to act like this.