Chapter Text
“Please!”
Her boots scraped against the metal.
“Please, I'm sorry! I’m sorry!”
Pale hands grip her arms as they drag her lower and lower into the ship.
“Please! Don’t—don’t do this! I’m sorry!”
She was pale and skinny and malnourished. The men had her lifted, her feet barely touching the floor as they dragged her down a hall.
“Quaritch!”
The huge man stood in the dim light, watching her from behind at the entrance of the hall.
“I’m sorry! I’ll do anything!”
Her breath sped up at the sight of the glass and the white room. Her lungs are unable to get the air inside.
“Please! I’ll do whatever you want! Just don’t put me in here!”
Her tear stained face whipped back to Quaritch who was stoic and stony faced. Indifferent to her screams and pleas.
In the middle of the room was a wheelchair, restraints on each arm and leg.
“No!”
The men shoved her inside while she screamed and sobbed, pushing her body down into a sitting position despite her trying to escape.
She wails as the restraints dig into her skin, biting them red.
Quaritch watches her from outside the glass, silent and stoic.
She screams as it all goes dark.
Maya’s body hits the floor, her breath coming out in short huffs as she lays before scrambling to stand.
She forced her feet to move as she stumbled out of her home, kneeling down to cup the water.
Maya pushes the water over her face, letting it drip down into her clothes. Her hands braced onto her knees, eyes squeezed shut.
It was just a dream, she wasn’t there anymore. Maya is here, with Metkayina and her family.
“Maya?”
The soft calling of her name still made her jump.
Her head whipped around to find her father standing there, his face scrunched with worry and a hand held out, as if soothing an animal.
Behind him was her mother, standing a few feet away but concerned none the less by the look on her face. Neteyam stood next to her with his hand on her shoulder.
“Baby, are you alright?” Jake quietly asked, carefully taking a seat next to her.
His hand comes up and brushes a strand of hair behind her ear. Her hair has grown out in waves now, sandy blonde hair braided into traditional Metkayina styles.
Jake missed her hair.
“Hm?” Jake hummed in question, his fingers now combing through Maya’s tanged hair “what is wrong, my daughter?”
Maya only sighs, falling against her fathers chest who wrapped his arm around her shoulders.
“Nothing” she mumbles, eyes closed “just working myself up, I guess.”
“Hm” Jake rumbles, he doesn’t ask for an explanation, doesn’t need one. If Maya wasn’t ready, he wouldn’t push.
Jake cups her head and presses a soft kiss to her hair “oh sweet girl” he whispers, lips still pressed against her forehead “my little girl.”
Maya stopped being a little girl when she was sixteen.
She’s seventeen now and feels a whole lot older.
Maya is the oldest she’s ever been but she’s never felt so little.
Eventually, Jake moves her back into their home and tucked her in between himself and Neytiri.
Neytiri’s hand rubs circles into her back, humming her daughter's part of her songcord while Jake keeps her tucked close to his chest.
Soon, Maya’s breath evens out and her eyes flutter shut. Jake lets out a sigh of relief.
Neytiri’s nimble fingers find the pin pricks at the base of her daughter’s spine, remembering with a scowl of the explanation from Norm.
They stuck long needles in her back to extract fluid, it was barbaric. Against the Great Mother.
“She’s okay,” her mate whispers, “just spooked.”
“That was not spooked, Ma'Jake,” Neytiri said lowly. “She fell from her bed, never has that happened before. I thought she was getting better.”
“I don’t think Maya will ever get better,” Jake admits, causing Neytiri to bristle.
It’s bad but true. There is no getting better but recovery. Healing.
“How can you say such things?” Neytiri hissed, eyes burning with anger. “She is your daughter! You do not want her to heal?!”
“That isn’t what I mean” Jake sighed, a hand rubbing down his face “what Maya went through..”
Jake tried to find the words for it; that Maya could only live with what happened? That it was something she’ll never forget? That Maya has to go day to day remembering what happened to her?
“It’s not something that goes away” Jake decides “it stays with you and you learn to live with it.”
“Ewya will heal her” Neytiri argues back, leaning over and kissing Maya’s hair “we must trust The Mother, Jake.”
Jake closes his eyes with a sigh, his arm coming up and wrapping around his wife and daughter.
It’s been hard but they’ll be okay.
He hopes.
Dawn comes much too early in Maya’s opinion.
Gently, Maya pushed herself from her parents' hold. Surprisingly, not waking them.
All of her siblings slept on as Maya wrapped herself in her shawl and grabbed her blanket.
Her blanket was her muse and her escape.
It was huge now from the year she had spent weaving it. It was meant for her whole family when they sleep in a group.
Maya found she liked weaving, it was soothing to keep her hands busy.
She couldn’t hold a weapon without hearing the screams-
Ao’nung likes to bring her shells, flowers, and even pieces of bone to weave into the blanket’s edges.
Maya holds onto the hope of one day meeting the Aranahe, the weavers of the Kinglor forest. Maybe she’ll ask the Wind Traders, they’re estimated to arrive today anyway.
An old Omatikaya song rings in the air as Maya hums, weaving together pink and purple fabric.
She misses the forest. The sun is so bright here and it barely ever rains, her skin gets red and irritated and peels like nothing Maya has ever seen before.
The first time it happened had her mother screaming in fear and her hands hovering over her skin, she didn’t want to touch her in fear of making her worse.
Ronal was just as puzzled. Na’vi skin, especially Metkayina skin, had adapted to withstand long periods within sunlight. Maya, however many Na’vi traits she portrays, does not have this luxury.
Her skin was pale white and prone to bright red scrapes and dark purple bruises.
Her dad simply laughed and called it a sun burn and explained that Maya would be fine and that her skin would peel away for new healthy skin below it. Just keep cold water on the burn and have Norm bring something called “sunscreen.”
What she noticed, though, were small brown dots appearing on her shoulders and face. Dad called them freckles and said that they from the sun and that they made her look cute
It just made Maya angry.
She didn’t want red skin that peeled or small brown dots from the sun.
Maya didn’t want seashells and sand dollars, she wanted the wooden beads made from hometree, to drop from the high branches and fall upon the giant leaves, to call Amay from her little home.
Maya likes the ocean but loves the forest.
“It’s coming along very nicely, child” Tsahík's voice made Maya jump, her head turning to face Ronal who was standing behind her.
Ronal had taught Maya the beauty in quiet work for the clan, she had taught her the weaving practices of the Metkayina.
“I See you, Tshaìk” Maya says with a small smile.
Ronal smiled back “I See you, Maya.”
The Tshaìk settled down next to her, a hand held onto her very pregnant belly.
“How are they today?” Maya muses, her eyes focused on her weaving.
“My baby stays strong, thank Ewya” Ronal sighs.
Maya found great comfort in the Tsahík. She didn’t treat her as fragile like her mother or indifferent to her pain as her father or walk on eggshells around Maya like her siblings do in fear of setting her off.
To Ronal, Maya is Maya and that’s all she needed to be.
Not Neytiri’s poor, tormented daughter.
Not Jake’s perfect soldier.
Maya used to hate being just Maya, she wanted to be something bigger; greater than herself but now? That was a child’s wish.
The blood on her hands runs rivers in Ewya’s waters and Maya can only see the demon in herself.
That gun poisoned her.
Quaritch poisoned her.
In her dreams Lyle lays dead with his knife embedded in his chest, Quaritch rattles with breaths with a knife pointed to his throat.
Maya can still see the snarl on his lips when she pointed that gun at him.
He wanted a thank you, proof that Maya was grateful for “all that he had done for her” like what he did was okay.
The silk ripped under her fingers.
“What is wrong?” Ronal’s fingers brushed her hair behind her ear.
“I had a dream,” Maya admits, her voice quiet as she removes the silk from the blanket. She’ll have to fix that.
Ronal’s look urged her to continue “I was being dragged, by skypeople. I was begging, pleading with the demon to not lock me away. All he did was stare as they locked me down.”
Maya shook her head, wrapping an arm around her middle with one hand covering her face “I want to forget, It’s bad enough he’s my father I don’t want him in my dreams as well.”
“Your father is Toruk Makto” Ronal argues, pride swelling in her voice “a great leader, that is your father. Not this sky demon.”
She sounded so certain like it was written by the Great Mother herself.
“What if I’m tainted forever?” Maya whispered, eyes moving up to look at the woman next to her “Will Ewya ever forgive me? Am I really one of the People?”
Ronal simply sighs and grabs Maya’s hand “you are Ewya’s child otherwise she would not have bestowed her blessings upon you, you must hold hope in her plan, child.”
Ronal is wise and Maya considers herself lucky to have her favor.
“Come” Ronal commands, standing at her feet. “I would like some help with the herbs today.”
And that was how Maya spent the rest of her morning; with Tsireya and Ronal making ointments and sorting herbs. Tedious but necessary work.
Tsireya giggled at Maya who was complaining about Lo’ak snoring when Neteyam pushed into the Mauri.
“Maya, family meeting” it’s all Neteyam says before stepping out again.
Ronal gave a nod and Maya stepped out to follow her brother.
Neteyam sighed dramatically and threw an arm around his sister's shoulders despite his towering height.
“What is wrong, Ma’Maya?” Neteyam asked “I have yet to see you this morning, gone before we wake.”
“Nothing, Ma’Teyem” Maya smiled, grabbing the hand hanging over her shoulder “what is the meeting about.”
Neteyam chuckled “as if Dad tells us anything beforehand.”
Maya laughed and pushed into the Mauri where her family were situated.
“Fall in, guys” Jake says with the gesture of his hand.
Maya settles down near Kiri while her siblings sit closer.
Neytiri sits close to Jake, her face unreadable as ever but her father? That man’s an open book.
He looks worried and keeps giving her odd glances. It’s freaking Maya out, if she’s honest.
Maya only pulls her shawl over her shoulders, nervousness riddled in her stomach.
“We’ve come to a decision” Jake began “regarding our future.”
“Our future?” Lo’ak asked, brows furrowed in confusion “I thought we were staying? Here, in the ocean?”
“We are” Jake sighed “but me and your mother decided to send Maya back to the forest with the Wind Traders.”
What.
What!?
“What!?” She’s standing before she thinks.
Her father holds out his hands now “baby-.”
“No!” Maya yelled, anger bubbling over like lava “no, this is such bullshit!”
“You’re sending Maya away?” Tuk cried, held in Kiri’s arms.
“No!” Jake gasped, desperate to regain the situation “no, that’s not what this is.”
“Please, Dad, this isn’t fair!” Maya cried, Jake’s hand settled on her shoulder “I want to stay! Please!”
“Baby” Jake says quietly “you’re suffering here, I see it. Maybe spending some time away back home will do you some good. You can’t live like this.”
“Please let me stay!”
“We’re thinking about what’s best for you.”
“Maya is a part of this family!” Kiri cried, her hand coming up to grab her sister's hand.
They just got her back! And now they want to send her away?
“Of course she is, Kiri,” Neytiri soothed, finally speaking up.
Her mother stood and took her eldest into her lap, holding her head to her chest just like she did when she was little.
“You belong in the forest, my love” Neytiri softly stroked the girl's hair. “your grandmother will take great care of you, you will be Tshaìk.”
“Please, Dad!” Maya hears Neteyam say “it’s Maya! Not a piece of cargo.”
“It’s been decided” Jake says, leaving no room for any argument “we will see you home, Maya.”
Maya loves the forest, truly she does, but if her family is sending her away? Too scared of their troubled daughter to care for her anymore?
Then what’s the point?
She doesn’t want to be Tshaìk! She wants to be here! With her mom and dad and siblings!
Maya shoves her mother away “no! Get off me!”
“Maya-” her mother goes to grab her but she only shoves her hands away.
“No! Don’t touch me!” Maya cries “why not just turn me over to the RDA!? I’m not Na’vi, anyways!”
“Maya!” Jake hissed “don’t say that!”
Her dad is standing now too.
“No! Just send me away!” Maya reached up and tore her songcord from her neck “take this too, while you're at it!”
Maya tossed the cord into the group with her mothers cry of horror as her daughter stomped away to the door only for Tsireya to open it.
“The wind traders are here!”