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I would kill someone just to have Michael Clifford know I exist.
Luke exits his messaging app, waiting for his online friend to reply, before scrolling through his Twitter feed. He retweets every picture of Malum he sees and spends a little more time fawning over Michael's new hair color. Michael Clifford is in a two person band with Calum Hood that's very unoriginally called "Malum". It's Luke's longest and largest obsession.
Annie, his friend he met from Twitter, texts him back. Then what would you do for him to be your soulmate?
Luke's face is blank as he replies. I'd commit the biggest mass murder in history. He waits a second before adding on. Jk.
Jesus lmao. You worry me sometimes.
What can I say? I love Michael Clifford. Luke looks at the time and a wave of relief floods him. He hesitates before sending his next text. I have about an hour before my mom will call me down for dinner. Do you want to video chat with me?
The thing with making friends on the internet is that Luke never knows if they're real or not. He's met plenty of people through his Twitter (because he's considered an online personality), and most of them are who they say they are, but some of them, like Annie, are more suspicious. They never talk on the phone, they never video chat, and they never send selfies too quickly. Luke doesn't like assuming the worst in people, but he definitely has his precautions.
Luke retweets about half a dozen more pictures before he gets a response, and he's not that surprised by it. Disappointed, perhaps, but not surprised. Sorry, I can't right now. Maybe tomorrow. Luke knows that's code for "maybe never." He's gotten the same response ever since he met Annie. At first it started with good excuses, but after repeating a few of them, it seems as if Annie gave up.
That's okay. We can talk about how much hotter Michael will be once he meets me (his soulmate).
Luke gets a much more enthusiastic reply to that. Soulmates are sort of a thing of topic within his generation nowadays. Luke and his friends have finally learned why most older people look more attractive than the newer generations and even more attractive than the pictures of when they were young. It all has to do with an action called "bulking."
Bulking directly relates to falling in love with one's soulmate. Once both people fall in love with each other, each of them will seemingly "bulk up" over night. Their physical characteristics will change so that they still look like themselves, but a much more attractive version. Luke has met people that lost lots of weight and even gained weight and got clear skin the night they fell in love with their soulmate. He also knows that some people's muscles grow, stomachs flatten, teeth straighten and whiten, and faces contour naturally.
Luke has seen a lot of art on the internet of artists taking a picture and bulking it to let people know somewhat how they're going to look after they fall in love with their soulmate. He finds it all fascinating but prefers to wait until it happens for him to see what he'll look like.
He's going to look so good! Annie gushes over text.
Luke spends a long while talking with Annie about how attractive Michael Clifford already is. It's sort of a common occurrence between the two.
Eventually, Annie says that she has to go, and Luke figures that's okay because dinner is almost ready anyway. He dismisses her, and doesn't talk to her until a few hours later when he's all cozy in bed, the clock reading two in the morning, his lights off, and a picture of Michael staring back at him on his phone.
Luke, I have something to ask you.
Luke scours his brain for what Annie could possibly be curious about. His heart rate speeds up considerably as he answers. Yes?
What's your sexuality?
Luke's cheeks grow warm as he answers. It's not every day someone asks you that question. I don't like having specific labels. I'm sexually attracted to both boys and girls but more so girls. Sometimes I'm not sure if I'm actually sexually attracted to someone I'm not in a relationship with, but then there's obviously Michael Clifford. I'm romantically attracted to both boys and girls but more so boys. Idk I'm a mess.
Out of Luke's nature, he doesn't immediately exit out of his messages. He watches as the three dots appear and disappear and reappear a few times before another message pops up. That's cool. I think I'm attracted to boys more than girls. Sexually and romantically.
You know, Luke starts, I think everyone is somewhat attracted to the opposite gender. Like, anything is possible.
Exactly. Plus, labels are stupid. Why do we have to name everything?
Luke agrees. Everyone's preferences are different. How did this come up?
Well, I was just sort of wondering about you. You talk about Michael Clifford a lot, and he's a guy, so I was just curious if you liked girls too. Luke thinks that's a logical explanation. Good thing you do.
Luke is caught off guard with the last message. That was definitely Annie flirting with him. He's not really sure how to respond. He decides to play dumb. What do you mean?
I mean that you're cute, and I'm into you. And I know that this is a bit forward, but I'm a little tipsy right now, so let's blame it on liquid courage.
Luke sets down his phone, staring into the darkness of his room. On one hand, Annie is his best friend. Luke would be lying if he said he didn't have some attraction to her. She's nice and funny and just understands him. On the other hand, there's the whole living in different parts of the world and the fact that Luke hasn't even heard her voice before. After some consideration, he decides on what to say to her.
Annie, I like you a lot. I'd be lucky to date you. Maybe we can take things slow between us though? Because you're still my best friend, and we might decide that dating isn't what we want.
Annie is texting back right away, and the message pops up within a few seconds. Of course! I'm just glad that you even considered dating me. I know I haven't been completely honest with you but it means a lot that you can look past it. I promise I'll talk to you someday about why I never call you.
And Luke figures he's really got almost nothing to lose if Annie really likes him. Why not today?
Today's not a good day. I'm already half asleep as it is, and I'll probably say something more stupid than I already have.
Alright. Luke answers after a few seconds of rereading Annie's message. I think I'm going to go to sleep. You should too.
I will. Goodnight, Luke.
Goodnight, Annie.
Luke plugs in his phone and sets it on his nightstand. He thinks to himself about how some part of Annie is real. The person texting him is real whether Annie isn't. She likes Michael Clifford just as much as Luke does. She's sent him long messages about what she goes through every day with her friends and family. Luke knows she has real feelings. He tries to commit that to memory so that he can reflect back on it when Annie tells him what she needs to.
Luke falls asleep worrying about what lies ahead.
--
Luke is absolutely upset. Absolutely, terrifyingly, super-duper-uber upset. He's about-to throw-his-phone-out-the-window kind of upset.
Michael Clifford fell in love with his soulmate.
Luke's soulmate, Michael Clifford, fell in love with his soulmate.
Well, Luke's wishful thinking won't save him now. He's clearly not Michael Clifford's soulmate; he's never met Michael Clifford.
Pictures are streaming around the internet of Michael bulked up, his hair full and fluffy, his eyes bright and shiny, his smile radiating sunshine, and his skin flawless and shimmery. Luke's never been so torn. On one hand, Michael looks really good. Like, really really good. On the other hand, Luke's not his soulmate. He decides to let out his frustration with the only person that will understand what he's going through.
ANNIE ANNIE ANNIE ANNIE ANNIE ANNIE ANNIE ANNIE ANNIE ANNIE ANNIE ANNIE ANNIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Annie doesn't respond. Well, at least not right away. Well, at least not after a few hours. It's almost time for Luke to have dinner when he gets any sort of response.
Luke, I want you to call me.
Luke is taken aback. He didn't think Annie would ask him to call so soon. She's been carefully avoiding calling him all these times before, and now she throws caution to the wind? Luke has to admit he's more nervous than he thought he would be.
No, I can't. I need to talk to you about Michael.
Annie doesn't take long to reply. Exactly. It'd be easier to talk over the phone.
Luke's heart beats loudly in his chest, his fingers going to the contact page for Annie. He must've been staring at his screen for quite a while because a new page appears and it's of the accept or decline buttons with Annie's name at the top. He takes a deep breath and just when he's sure the call is about to go to voicemail, he answers.
"Hello?" He holds his breath, waiting for a reply. Something doesn't feel right.
"Luke," comes a voice that's surely not a girl's.
"An-Annie? Where's Annie?" he stutters. Luke can feel his palms sweating, his phone growing slippery as he holds it to his ear.
"I'm, uh, Annie," the voice replies.
And Luke feels like a dick. Surely, Luke should've been more careful with his words. "I'm so sorry, it's just your voice is a little low, and I didn't even think ab-"
"Well, I mean. My name isn't Annie."
Luke bites his tongue. He knew this was coming. "It's not?"
"My name is . . . um, Michael." And maybe it's Luke's wishful thinking again, but he suddenly realizes a bit of a familiar voice.
"Michael?" he repeats. Somehow he can breathe easier, the hardest part settling and confusion taking over.
"Yeah, and I fell in love with my soulmate last night," Michael announces. This Michael/Annie person must be bullshitting him.
"You must be bullshitting me. Why are you fucking with me?" Luke asks, not really trying to get his voice to stop showing the hurt.
"I'm not, Luke! I'm Michael Clifford. I'm so sorry I didn't tell you sooner. I was going to, but then I got afr-"
"Prove it," Luke demands. Michael's babbling dies down.
"How?" Michael asks quietly.
The line is silent before Luke can hear a tapping sound. "I don't know, do something. You've been lying to me all along, why shouldn't you be lying-" a notification pops up on his screen "-to me now?"
He opens the notification, his heart racing. It opens up Twitter, and he has to force his eyes to look at the screen, reading a Tweet from Michael Clifford himself.
@MichaelClifford: talking with @LukeClifford on the phone now.
Luke's mouth drops open, white swirls dancing through his vision. He feels like he can't get enough oxygen. "Shit, you're right. It's you. What the fuck? What the fuck! Okay. What the fuck?"
"Breathe, Luke. Shit," Michael curses over the line.
"Why did you do it?" Luke asks, feeling a weird mix of excitement and betrayal.
Michael sighs dramatically. "This is going to be really embarrassing. I wanted to meet my fans without them knowing it's me. I thought it was funny talking to them about myself. I never thought I'd fall in . . ." Michael trails off.
Luke's breath stops short. He knows what Michael was going to say. But Michael has a soulmate. Luke's not Michael's soulmate. He can't be talking about Luke.
"Which fan did you fall in love with?" Luke asks in a whisper.
Silence. And then more silence. And then Luke has to look at his phone to make sure the call didn't drop before he puts it back to his ear, barely in time to hear "you" being quietly spoken.
"I'm your soulmate?" Luke squeaks out, his voice cracking.
"You don't have to fall in love with me yet," Michael rushes to say. "I know what I did was absolutely terrible, and I don't blame you if you don't want to talk to me again, but I also know you, and I know that you've been waiting to meet me. I'm just sorry that the first time you talked to me was when I was telling you I was a catfish."
Luke thinks over everything. He thinks about how he knew all along Annie wasn't being completely honest with him. He thinks about how he knew Annie was possibly another person. He thinks about how Annie got sort of detached when they talked about Michael, like she wouldn't be completely into giving her opinion on him. He thinks about how none of that mattered to him when Annie became his best friend. He thinks about how sincerely upset he was that he wasn't Michael's soulmate. He thinks about how Michael didn't drag the friendship on any longer when he found out he was Luke's soulmate. He thinks about how he's Michael Clifford's soulmate. He thinks about how he didn't know he was Michael Clifford's soulmate. He thinks about how Annie asked him out.
"So the first time I meet you better be a date," Luke says, a smile growing on his face.
"You mean that?" Michael asks hopefully, and Luke can feel the fondness grow in his chest. Luke can't shake his giant crush for the celebrity.
"Yeah. You're my soulmate, aren't you?" Luke teases.
--
After talking longer with Michael, Luke learned that Michael had to get up early in the morning for some interviews. They decided not to tell who Michael's soulmate is, but he can say what the gender is. Luke found himself growing to like Michael as Michael and not Annie the longer they talked, and when his mother called him down for his dinner, he sat with a smile on his face even when his parents asked about Michael Clifford's soulmate. Luke knows they expected him to be upset because Michael is Luke's favorite celebrity, but they weren't exactly sure why Luke didn't seem bothered by the situation.
Of course, the learned why about a month later when tabloids everywhere were showing sneaky images of Michael and Luke playing footsie underneath a table at a small coffee shop. And of course, they didn't have to ask questions when Luke came home from another date a few days later with sparkling eyes and a glowing aura about him. Sure, his parents still talked to him about having a soulmate and even mentioned internet safety once they learned how Luke and Michael met, but they were happy for their little boy.
--
"Remember when you said you'd commit mass murder to be Michael Clifford's soulmate?" Michael asks, his bare arms touching the skin of Luke's waist as he holds him close underneath the sheets of their shared bed.
"Don't remind me," Luke groans. "I was such an embarrassing fanboy."
"Did you actually kill anyone?" Michael asks, his lips brushing against Luke's bare shoulder.
"Shut the fuck up."