Chapter Text
Feyre was difficult to convince. When Nesta initially brought up the idea of her leaving the Night Court, her answer was a swift and immediate “No.”
“I just don’t understand Nesta. Why would you even want to go to the Autumn Court? I’ve told you what the fae who live there are like, why would you want to experience it for yourself?”
“You don’t need to understand. In fact I shouldn’t even need your blessing to leave this stupid place, but I wanted to at least do the kindness of letting you know I was going.”
Feyre paused in her pacing. They stood in her new art studio, another gift from Rhysand. Nesta had hoped that by meeting her here it would show Feyre that she was serious about this. Feyre’s paint-covered hands moved to push back the hair that had fallen in her face and she turned to Nesta with something that could also be mistaken for pity in her eyes. Nesta couldn’t help the way she bristled at the thought.
“Is this about Cassian?” Feyre asked quietly
Nesta didn’t respond at first. No, she was too busy curling her hands into tight fists to suffocate the cold fire that was brought to her fingertips at that name. Despite the power she could hear whispering to her to be set free, she contained herself. “I don’t see how what happens between me and that oaf is any business of yours. In fact I don’t see how he relates to this conversation at all.”
“Oh come on Nesta don’t lie to me like that. Look I get it, it’s terrifying to almost lose someone you love. But endangering your own life for no reason is a fool's errand! Cassian needs time and space to heal. Rhys had to send him away or he was gonna keep making his injuries worse. He did it because he loves him!”
Nesta nearly barked out a laugh. Oh, Rhys loved him alright. Loved Cassian so much he had to hide him away lest Feyre’s evil sister Nesta got her hands on him. Cauldron forbid he make his own choice in the matter. Cauldron forbid Nesta gets asked her opinion on anything.“Feyre, I came here to tell you when I leave, and nothing more. If you care so much for my future safety, then you’re more than welcome to visit me during my stay with Eris.”
With that Nesta turned her back on Feyre and started for the door.
“He misses you y’know.”
Nesta prided herself that she didn’t falter at Feyre’s cheap shot to the heart. “Then he can come and tell me so himself.”
With her head held high, she marched through the doors of the studio. It was only later, in the cold of her room, that she was finally able to shake the flames from her hands, leaving a cold vacuum that seemed to swallow her whole.
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Eris came two days later, arriving at the Moonstone Palace where Nesta had agreed to meet him. Elain and Feyre were the only ones that had come to see her off.
Eris had winnowed in with a few lesser fae who went to grab the few possessions Nesta had packed. Nesta gripped Elain’s hand tightly by her side as he approached.
“The Archeron sisters.” He bowed shallowly, “Truly a pleasure.”
Feyre’s eyes bore into Eris as she observed him. “Eris. If you have a moment I’d like to speak to you in private before you depart.”
Eris stood from his bow and his eyes went to Nesta, almost as if seeking her approval. She raised an eyebrow at him, just to see what he’d do.
“Of course High Lady. I’m sure you have plenty you want to say to me.” He gestured an arm to one of the alcoves in the great hall they found themselves in and Feyre walked towards it without another glance in his direction. Eris pulled his eyes from Nesta’s and went to follow after her.
Elain’s grip on her hand pulled tighter and Nesta turned to face her sister who had gone pale in the moments of Eris’ arrival. “Elain what’s wrong?” Nesta asked.
“I… I’m gonna miss you Nesta. I know you can handle yourself but I don’t understand why you can’t just stay here with us. With me?”
Nesta turned to face Elain and used her free hand to gently cup her cheek “I’m going to miss you too Elain. But…” words failed her for a moment as she tried to find a way to say she was cracking apart without scaring her sister more,”...But I need to do this. I need to do something for myself with this eternity or I think I’d lose my mind.”
Elain closed her eyes and leaned into Nesta’s hand, sadness was written plain across her face. That was something Nesta always admired about Elain; that she wore her emotions like they were her armor, while Nesta hid hers like a weakness. Nesta sighed and pressed their foreheads together, “Look after Feyre while I’m gone okay? And you’d better write to me every day you can because I’ll be writing to you.”
Elain nodded and pulled Nesta into her embrace. Nesta fell into it tightly, winding her arms around her sister like she was the greatest treasure in the world. She felt tears stain the shoulder of her dress where Elain had pressed her face, “I will.” Elain said fiercely. “I-I don’t understand why but…but if this is what you need to do then you have my love. Just please don’t forget about m-us while you're gone.”
“I wouldn’t dream of it,” Nesta whispered tightly back.
As they pulled apart Nesta turned and saw Feyre and Eris walking back to the center of the hall. Feyre seemed calmer than she had since Nesta first mentioned the name of the Autumn Court though Eris seemed to carry new shadows in his fiery eyes. Nesta turned to give Feyre her own goodbye.
While they hugged Feyre whispered fast into her ear,” You say the word and I’ll be there. Anytime, anyplace.”
Nesta almost laughed at that,” I should say the same for you Feyre. And… thank you.”
When Feyre pulled away she held Nesta at arm’s length for a moment, considering her. Her eyes had always seemed to pick up on even the slight cracks in the mask Nesta wore. It seemed like she was reading those cracks now and had begun to understand. Nesta had been trying to hold it together for so long, for the sake of her sisters and the new family Feyre had carved out for them. But she couldn’t hold on forever. she needed to do something for herself for once. To start, she needed space and this was the easiest way for her to ask for it.
Feyre squeezed her arms and finally let go, leaving Nesta to face Eris. He seemed to have fought back some of the darkness that clouded his mind because the smirk he gave her read of nothing but confidence. He held a calloused hand out to her, waiting for Nesta to make the next move. These were the games she could play. The games that had rules and made sense and didn’t involve accidentally hurting the ones she loved. She lifted her own graceful hand and placed it in his. She was flooded by his warmth and her own cold flames seemed to sing in response, burning a hole in her stomach as he pulled her forward. “Shall we?” she asked.
“It would be an honor.” he smiled as he pulled her closer than necessary for this next part. Nesta turned to Elain and Feyre one last time and offered them a rare smile. Neither commented that it was strained. Then between one breath and the next her sisters’ faces disappeared and Nesta felt her body seem to shrink and invert itself before she felt her feet on solid ground again. She opened her eyes and let out a gasp as she took in the great rolling valley that Eris Had brought her to.
Sunlight peeked through clouds and rained down upon a forest of jewels. Every leaf on every tree seemed to be painted with it’s own gorgeous sunset. The forest weaved around them and up a great hill where she could see what must be the Forest House of the Vansera’s. The wind whispered against her skin and she swore she could hear the twinkling of wind chimes in the air around her. As the wind carried through the forest she saw golden leaves fly from trees and take to the sky, almost like they were waving in greeting. A long jade river seemed to run through the heart of it all, spreading out like veins through the cover of trees. The pulsing lifeblood of a land that screamed of prosperity and riches.
“Beautiful,” Eris whispered at her side, suddenly reminding Nesta that she was still holding his hands.
She pulled her hand away from his own and the warmth she had been filled with seemed to go with it. “Yes” she breathed, “It’s unlike anything I’ve ever seen.”
Eris smiled at her, his face glowing with warmth like the sun. He gestured upwards towards the Forest House she would call home for the next however long “And this is only the beginning.”
He offered her his arm and Nesta took it gently, her eyes moving from the view of the valley to rest fully on Eris. As they began to ascend she whispered, more to herself than to him, “I want to see it all.”