Chapter Text
Several day had passed, and Beecher finally came to a decision about what to do with Keller. He picked up his phone and dialed Bonnie's number. He flicked his pen on the desk as he listened to the line ring.
"Hello?" Keller's voice replied.
Beecher smiled as he heard Keller's voice. "Hey, Chris, it's me, Toby."
There was a pause. When Keller finally answered, his voice was very rough. "I was starting to think you weren't even going to call me. I know I told you that I wouldn't bother you until you made your decision, but you don't know how hard it has been to stay away from you. I miss you so much."
Beecher laughed.
"What's do funny?" Keller's voice sounded hard.
"You are. Did you really think I would just walk away from you without letting you know what I've decided?"
"That's not funny," Keller said in a huff. "So, what did you decide?"
"I don't want to say it over the phone. Can you come to my office around lunch time? We'll talk about it over lunch."
"Well, I guess if that's the way you want it?"
Beecher smiled. "Keller this is not like you. Will you promise me to cheer up?"
"Why don't you realize just how much you mean to me? I know I've hurt you, but how can I make it up to you if you give me nothing but slience?"
"You know why I did it."
"I know." Keller's voice became gruff. "It doesn't mean I have to like it."
Beecher frowned. "You will not make me feel guilty over this, Chris. I needed time to think things over, so I took it."
"I know." Beecher heard Keller swallowing. "I'll see you then." Keller hung up the phone.
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Beecher watched the clock on the wall as he waited for Keller to arrive. He had been nervous ever since he had talked to Keller. Keller's voice had worried him. It was not like him to get depressed over things. Beecher knew he could have made Keller feel better if he had told him what he had decided, but he knew Keller well enough to know that Keller wouldn't have listened to anything else afterwards if he had. It was important to make Keller understand how things had to be if this was going to work out.
Of course knowing that and feeling okay with the knowledge were two different things. Beecher was surprised by how much he was still affected by Keller's feelings. It was like they hadn't spent anytime apart. It always shocked him how that worked out between them. Beecher figured that that was one of the reasons he had fanially decided how he did. It was the only thing that felt right, the only thing that made sense to him.
"Mr. Beecher?" Babara said over the intercom. "There's a Chris Keller to see you."
"Send him right in, and hold all my calls."
"Sure thing, Mr. Beecher."
A second later, the door to his office opened and Keller walked in. Beecher smiled as he got up and walked over to Keller.They hugged each other before they kissed deeply.
Keller smirked. "I take it this is your decision?"
Beecher hesistated. "We'll get to that in a minute. First, what would you like for lunch? I was going to send out Barbara to get whatever you want."
Keller waved the idea away. "I'm not that hungry, Toby. I just want to hear what you have decided."
Beecher looked at him, searching for some kind of sign. "What's wrong? You're not acting like yourself."
Keller's expression darkened. "How am I supposed to act? You've kept me waiting forever!"
Beecher returned the expression. "I thought we already talked about this."
Keller swallowed, counting to ten in his head. "I know that. It doesn't make this any easier for me. You're slience is killing me."
Beecher caressed Keller's cheek. "I wish I could make it clear to you that I'm not trying to hurt you. This hasn't been easy for me either, you know."
Keller closed his eyes, enjoying the feel of Beecher's hand. "I know that. It's just that I hurt you so much that I don't know what to do to make this right between us. I wasn't thinking when I tried to mess up your parole."
"Then why did you do it?"
"I thought that you were getting on with your life while I was stuck in that hell-hole. I just knew you wre going to forget about me. I couldn't bear the thought, so I figured the only way to prevent that and to get you back in my life was to get you sent back to Oz."
"But why would you want to take me away from my kids?"
Keller looked down. "I guess I wasn't thinking about that. Sister Pete tried to get me to see that." He looked at Beecher, a tear running down his cheek. "I'm so sorry, Toby. Can you forgive me?"
Beecher wiped the tear away. "It's going to be hard for me to do that, but I'm willing to try if you are."
Keller looked hopeful. "So, is that your decision?"
Beecher nodded. "Yes, it is, but there are conditions."
"What conditions?"
"Have a seat, Chris." He walked back around his desk and sat down as Keller did the same. "That's why I wanted you to come here, so we could talk about them."
Keller leaned back in his seat. "So, let's have them."
Beecher rested his elbow on his desk. "I want you to understand that my kids come first in my life. I know you've always said that all that's important is you and me, but it can't be like that now. They're involved in this, and I will not allow them to be hurt in any way possible. You understand?"
"You know I would never hurt your kids."
"I know that, but that's not what I mean. I don't want them to come into the middle of one of our arguments. If we're going to be together you are going to have to show me that you understand that they come first to me."
"I will, Toby."
"That means we are only going to date each other until you can prove that you've really changed."
"Exactly what do you mean?" Keller asked, suspiciously. "We're not going to be together?"
Beecher sighed as he tried to figure out how to say what he needed to say without offending Keller. "One, day, I would like to be able to live with you and my kids as a family. That's how I see you. But you are going to have to prove that you are going to be there for my kids and me."
Keller looked worried. "And how do I do that?"
"By being the man I know you can be."
"What if I can't be that man? I'm the person I am. That's all I can be."
Beecher got up and walked around the desk. He sat in the other chair and put his hands on Keller's knees. "Behind all that bravado, there lies a decent man, a man who who do anything for the ones he loves. That's all I'm asking of you. I know we're going to fight. We are two stubborn individuals, but that doesn't mean we have to hurt one another. You've hurt me, and I've hurt you. If this is going to work, then we have to try to treat each other better than we have. Does that make sense?"
Keller smiled shyly. "I guess." He breathed depply. "So, are we good?"
Beecher smiled back. "I guess we are."
Keller reached over and grabbed Beecher's face. He leaned over and kissed him. "Why don't we forget about lunch and get ourselves a room?" Keller leered at him.
Beecher laughed as he got up and went over to the door. "Why waste money on one when right here will do just fine?" He locked the door and pointed to Keller. "Come here. Show me how much you love me."