Chapter Text
“You’ve been somewhere else today,” Grace pointed out to Nikita the following morning.
“Sorry. I’ve got a lot on my mind.”
“Is everything okay? Mystery man giving you any trouble?”
Nikita smiled briefly at the nickname her coworkers had been tossing around the bookstore for months now.
“Michael…his name is Michael.”
“So, mystery man has a name,” Grace smiled wide and approvingly at the new nugget of information Nikita had provided.
There was no one she could talk to about Michael, not really, but Grace was a steady and mostly impartial observer. She was the first real female friend she’d had in a long time. She felt comfortable confiding in her, even if she stayed a little vague on the details.
“We knew each other a long time ago, but I had to go. He loved me enough to let me leave.”
“And now he wants you back.”
“And now…I don’t know. We’re kind of tiptoeing around each other. We had dinner last night.”
Grace raised an eyebrow asking a question she didn’t want to verbalize.
“It was only dinner,” she assured her.
“How was it? Seeing him again without ‘The Books’ to hide behind.”
Nikita thought back to the end of their evening. Michael had helped her with her coat. His fingers momentarily traced the hair that spilled over the collar. She managed to catch the reflective look in his eyes when he did so. His hand hovered indecisively in the air once she’d stepped away.
She reached out and affectionately squeezed his upper arm through the layers of wool in his clothing.
“Good night, Michael.”
“Good night, Nikita.”
She turned and began walking towards the parking lot and her vehicle. Why she turned she wasn’t entirely sure. They’d said their goodbyes but when she did turn, she knew she was lost.
He was ethereal in the pale light that emanated from the restaurant window. The light dusting of snow that fell illuminated him like some dark angel.
Michael looked at her like she was his whole reason for being. She remembered that look vividly. He might as well have been standing there naked. This entire evening had been about reacquainting themselves with the remnants of their former lives and reexamining them, discovering new facets.
Being with Michael was an exercise in restraint, to not let emotions get in the way of common sense. Nikita knew she hadn’t been entirely successful. That was exactly what she’d feared when she accepted his invitation. To allow Michael back into her orbit was dangerous. She had too much to lose now.
And yet, Nikita had always been one to throw caution to the wind. She walked back the few steps between them until she too fell within the dreamy glow of the window.
Upon reaching him, she grasped one of the still ungloved hands by his side, squeezed, and pressed a lingering kiss on Michael’s whiskered cheek. She felt his breath catch in the faintest of ways.
“Don’t be a stranger,” she whispered into his ear, before pulling back.
It was the first skin on skin contact she’d initiated. She felt bold and reckless in her desire. She’d think about her actions in the morning when the essence of Michael wasn’t clouding her judgment.
“It was nice to reconnect,” she told Grace, back in the present.
“Given how he pops in with no real schedule, my guess is that he doesn’t live in the area.”
“No, he doesn’t,” The reality of what Michael did with his life, of what he represented, was a splash of cold water on the curious tendrils of possibility. “Oh, Grace I’ve missed him.” Nikita was taken aback at the heartache she could hear in her voice. “But I never thought I’d see him again. There was a finality to the way we parted.”
“So is it a bit of nostalgia or is there something there…a second chance maybe?”
“I don’t know. For the last eight years I’ve been making decisions based on what’s good for me alone, not a relationship. I liked doing that. It was freeing.”
“Companionship is nice, though,” Grace offered kindly. “Someone to keep you warm at night.” Nikita’s lack of a love life had been a regular topic of conversation between the friends. Grace believed it was time for Nikita to start living again and to stop mourning the way she’d ended her relationship with Marc in New York.
“Yeah,” she replied wistfully. Nikita looked out onto the street where she first saw Michael again. She remembered the heady combination of fear, excitement, and desire that swirled within her then. “I liked being with Michael,” she asserted confidently. “It probably wasn’t the smartest thing to do, but it felt so right being with him. It wasn’t without its complications, though.”
Nikita looked at Grace and wondered how much she could reveal. “Michael has a shadow that follows him around—loss. He’s been through a lot and lost a lot of people extremely close to him. He’s never let it define him, but it cuts deep. It’s influenced how he connects with others…or doesn’t connect. It could be feast or famine with him sometimes.”
“Were you happy together?”
Nikita smiled at the memory of the short time she and Michael were truly together. It was both passionate and tender. It was comfortable and volatile. Either one of them could have died at any moment but seeing him, even from a distance always gave her a sense of peace. They’d survived another day.
“We were as happy as we could be.”
That was the truth. Section One was the reason they met. It always seeped into their relationship even before it became romantic. The manipulation didn’t go away simply because there was growing tenderness between them. Nikita had to come to terms with whether being with Michael was worth it despite their tenuous beginning. The possibility of betrayal was always there as long as Section was in the picture.
“That’s not the most promising of answers, Nik.”
Nikita smiled at the skeptical outside perspective of her and Michael’s relationship.
Two weeks later Michael was once again seated at the armchair next to the poetry section he favored.
Nikita smiled at him when he walked in and Michael nodded in return. She didn’t seek him out, but she was a little less guarded in her interactions with him. She let herself indulge in his presence.
It was comforting to know that she could look over to the corner armchair and see him there. As if sensing her observation, Michael would look up from his book and catch her gaze. The heat she saw in his eyes made her heart beat faster. She’d grow flustered with the innocent attention and struggled to hide her reaction.
Michael, of course, felt no embarrassment and further encouraged the flirtation. Eventually, Nikita gained her footing. After all, she was never a lightweight in the flirtation game. Nikita was just not keen on them displaying themselves in front of an audience.
“Nikita’s admirer,” her coworkers already teased.
“Your hair is longer again,” Michael reached out and lightly touched the ends of her hair that she now wore just past her collarbone.
Nikita had wandered over and impulsively sat on the arm of his chair. Their knees bumped up against each other and she draped her arm along the back. If she allowed herself to slip further down she’d find herself perched on his lap.
“Just a little.” She eyed his hair and lightly grazed the curling ends of his. “Yours is shorter.” She eyed the slight gradient like graying at his temples.
Michael soon started making more frequent visits. She flirted and he touched her with appreciation. It was fun. When they were alone he was generous with his affection. He was mostly stoic in public but indulgent with his touch in private, as if trying to make up for lost time.
Thérèse teased that the heated looks between her and Michael were making everyone feel depressed about the state of their own love lives.
During Michael’s next visit, Nikita gathered her coat and met him just beyond the front door.
“It’s such a pretty day. I thought I’d play hooky,” Michael held his arm out slightly in invitation and she comfortably curled her hand within.
Spring was around the corner, but it was still cool out. Nevertheless, the bright sunshine warmed them up. That and the warmth of Michael’s body was all Nikita needed. They walked and talked about inconsequential things, merely using the time to enjoy the fresh air.
They walked along the trails of Mount Royal soaking in the sunshine and each other’s company.
Soon enough the conversation naturally shifted to more introspective topics.
“Why did you pull away from me?” Michael quietly asked her. “In the months before you left.”
Nikita knew this question was coming. It was one of the things she regretted leaving unresolved between them.
“It was all too much,” Nikita pulled her hand away from Michael’s arm. She stopped walking and turned to face the city view before her. Her hand gripped the railing in front of her tightly. “I was having trouble sorting out my head. All that time that I was under the influence of the Gelman Process, I did things…things I had to come to terms with. By Section standards, they were acceptable, but not by my own.”
“And you couldn’t tell me?”
Michael leaned his back against the railing and reached out to tuck a strand hair behind her ear. His touch was feather soft and drew her gaze back towards him.
“I wanted to, but I wasn’t sure how to bring it up. I didn’t want to disappoint you. You moved heaven and earth for me, Michael, and I hated the idea of coming to you broken. I just couldn’t bare the prospect of telling you that it might have been for nothing. I thought…I hoped that all I needed was time. Time to put myself back together.”
Michael looked at her with aching tenderness. His eyes showed understanding and remorse.
“Do you know what I did?”
She’d often wondered if Michael was privy to her missions. As Level 5 he wouldn’t be denied access, but as his allegiance to Section was questioned, as he began to publicly shed the bonds that shackled him to it, Operations and Madeline often kept information away from him. Knowledge is power and they wanted to keep as much of it from Section’s most accomplished operative.
“Not at the time, no. Your activities were kept classified. Eventually I did learn about your actions during that period.”
“I felt dirty…tainted…and there you were being so attentive and wonderful. When I was with you I could pretend that everything was okay, but eventually everything would come back. When it did, I always felt worse.”
Nikita remembered the restless nights alone. Michael and she had resumed their relationship, but it only offered momentary relief. She still felt robotic and distant while Michael was awash with desperate passion. He felt no need to settle into complacency. He grabbed onto her with both hands. Nikita was nearly almost always overwhelmed by his need for her during those months. She tried to match his ardor. She wanted to lose herself in his love. If she’d ever doubted his feelings for her, she certainly didn’t by that point. She tried to anchor herself using Michael’s love, but it disturbed her that she couldn’t quite capture the same emotional state she’d had prior to her modification. She often wondered if she was convincing. Then that thought caused her grief because she didn’t want to be convincing, like a Valentine would be convincing. She just wanted to be.
“Did you suspect anything when we were together? Did you feel it was me or was I just that different?”
A thoughtful look crossed Michael’s features. He reached out a hand and unwrapped her fingers from the railing. Slowly, he turned her hand so that her wrist was exposed. While easing his thumb over her pulse point, he spoke.
“You were different…quieter, more introspective. I didn’t doubt your feelings, but I did note the growing distance. I wanted to make myself available to you if you wanted to talk.”
“And I was afraid to. I almost felt like if I said it out loud, then I could no longer hide from it. That I was admitting that it wasn’t going to go away on its own. I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to keep up the charade for very long. That you’d see right through it.”
Nikita paused momentarily before she continued with another painful subject.
“You asked me to move in with you.”
The mention of Michael’s invitation, first offered while he teased her senses with his proximity during a mission and then reiterated while he coaxed pleasure from her body with his sensual skills, caused a shadow of sadness to flicker across Michael’s eyes. During that time, Nikita was still cautiously optimistic that she could shake the odd state she found herself in. She just needed to drown herself in Michael. The Volker mission shattered that illusion. There would be no quick fix for how confused she was feeling.
“I wanted you near. I didn’t want to lose you again and after everything, playing it safe got us nowhere. It only gave us stolen moments. I wanted more for us.”
Nikita nodded her head. Michael had made his desires for them very clear during that time. He didn’t want to settle for clandestine rendezvous anymore. Having knowledge of Adrian’s whereabout gave him leverage he was prepared to exploit.
Michael’s brazenness had worried her. How much further would a man in love go?
“I found myself slipping back,” she confessed. “It would happen when I’d least expect it. It was almost as if something was triggered inside me. It would only be for a second, but I would feel so cold in that moment. The level of indifference and detachment would scare me.”
Michael reached out to her. His hand warmed the junction between her neck and shoulder. His thumb caressed the skin behind her ear. He drew her closer, their foreheads nearly touching and he spoke into the brief space between them he allowed.
“You deserved more time, but the missions kept coming. I should have done more to shield you from them.”
“Michael, you did. You were patient with me even as a pushed you away. Besides, what could you have done, shot me in the leg to keep me out of the field.”
“If I had to,” he answered vehemently.
Nikita ducked her head in chagrin. She believed him too and it would have further complicated their lives under Operations and Madeline.
She wrapped her arm around his and moved further down the path. They walked some more, processing the information they’d just shared.
“Did you love Helmut Volker?”
Nikita knew it cost Michael a lot to ask that question.
“At the time, I wasn’t sure. I didn’t trust my own feelings anymore. I didn’t trust that I could differentiate between faking emotion and feeling emotion. Especially with the residuals of the German Process still lingering, but no, I didn’t. I felt protective of him. In a lot of ways, I saw myself in him. The way I used to be. I hoped that I could find myself back to that person.”
She looked towards Michael to see how her words were received. To her relief she saw continued understanding in his eyes. She felt him tighten his grip on her arm and Nikita instantly knew that as difficult as this conversation had been, they were both getting what they needed from it. Nikita felt lighter as she slowly expressed to Michael thoughts that she’d spend years contemplating. She allowed herself a deep cleansing breath. The sun felt warm on her face and Michael was steady by her side. It really was such a nice day and she was grateful that they were outdoors. She felt less constricted. It would have been difficult had they been indoors. Four walls would have been too confining.
“You know, towards the end I thought you’d be better off without the complications I keep bringing into your life. I hated that I couldn’t give myself the way I wanted to you. That we couldn’t be together the way we wanted to be because of how badly my recovery was going. I had all these nagging doubts about myself. I was trying to pretend everything was alright, but I knew that I wasn’t doing a very good job at it. I didn’t like the person I'd become and I got desperate after a while," Nikita hesitated momentarily before she continued. "I’m sorry about how I treated you during the mission we did for Operations—aggressive one second and distant the next.”
“Fifteen days,” Michael quietly spoke in recollection.
“We never did use them. I’m sorry.”
Nikita remembered the shame she felt at the time with wanting to erect some distance between them. Michael had wanted those days for them.
The mission had required them to cohabitate while performing surveillance. At any other time, it would have been a dream mission, yet their close proximity and her ever present confusion agitated her. She didn’t want to further alienate Michael, but she feared it might reach the point where he’d push her for some answers. Thankfully, Michael chose to give her the space she silently craved.
The great irony of delaying the use of those fifteen days was that it turned out to be the last mission they did together. Michael immediately began to work on the Senegal mission. The same mission he had just completed when he came to her door that final time.
“You know, years later I’d fantasize about those days. About how we would have used them.”
“I know exactly how we would have used them.” He gave her a heated look. “And where we would have gone…away."
“Where?” She asked wistfully.
“That wouldn’t have mattered. Just waking up next to you for that many nights would have been enough.”
It was the truth. She knew it. For Michael, her company, would have been enough. She thought it would have been awkward, but she never truly considered that it could have been healing.
“It turns out time was what I needed. Eventually the lingering effects of the Gelman Process faded away. Feeling apathetic about things was the last thing to go. It did take some time though—years,” Nikita looked at him in apology. Years. She let that sink in. Even if she’d stayed in Section, it would have been a long road to feeling sane again. Would they have survived that? “It wasn’t until I was in New York that I truly felt that I’d shaken free of it.”
Michael’s face was once as familiar as her own. She knew he was processing all the information she was sharing.
“Marc helped a lot. It was easy with him. It was nice to be normal for a while. Everything I hated about the Section began to fade away…like a bad dream.”
She didn’t want to linger over the subject of Marc. They’d spoken a few times since they parted and Nikita had for the most part forgiven herself for her role in the breakup, but he was still a sensitive subject. Besides, if felt cruel to remind Michael that another man helped her heal during a difficult time. It was a role he would have freely taken on if he’d been given the chance.
“I got to learn more about myself. That was good too.”
“I’m glad. I’m glad you had the opportunity to heal on your own terms. It was difficult to watch you struggle during that time. You’ve always been so strong. I’d never bet against you.”
Michael’s approval touched something deep inside her. To have the approval of such a formidable man meant something to her.
To warm up they wandered into a cafe by the park and lunched on sandwiches and coffee. A lot of the heaviness from their earlier conversation had dissipated. What was left was more of the easiness that they’d enjoyed since their dinner last month. Once again Nikita was struck by the changes she’d observed in Michael. She marveled at the ease in which he smiled at her. He didn’t share too many details about what he’d been up to but what he did share was much more valuable. She caught herself staring dreamily into his face as she listened to him describe the stillness he encountered in northern Norway a few years ago while doing reconnaissance. She felt like she was right there alongside him as he gazed at the northern lights.
Nikita was definitely in trouble. Having Michael this close to her was causing havoc with her emotions. His regard was extremely powerful. Nikita had never been immune to Michael’s particular brand of magnetism. Deciding to throw caution to the wind didn’t happen instantly but incrementally.
By the time Nikita later leaned up against the brick facade of a quiet street in the Old Montreal neighborhood she had been just about ready to jump out of her skin.
“Are you trying to seduce me?” She asked, her hands on Michael’s waist to draw him towards her. He looked at her, pleased to have a partner adept at reading his subtle cues.
Their mouths hovered over each other, sharing oxygen. They were out in public, together. It was a novel experience for them both. To share intimacies in such a public space with no regard to bigger ramifications.
“All these years…to not touch you,” His whispered words sent shiver up her spine. “To be denied that…”
Michael smoothed his hand over her shoulder and down her upper arm. The movement was hypnotic.
The way she was drawn to Michael was like nothing else she’d ever experienced. He exuded such a strong gravitational force.
“I’ve had a good time,” she told him, feeling half drugged.
“Me too.”
Michael stared at her lips. His body was so close she could feel his body heat.
“Will you let me kiss you?” He whispered.
Nikita licked her lips in anticipation. His eyes followed the movement with great attention. Nikita wanted to stop fighting with herself. She should let herself enjoy this…enjoy him.
“I’ll allow it.”
Michael pressed his mouth to hers and she was instantly transported. She responded with a ferociousness she had long sensed herself incapable of anymore. With him, she was once insatiable.
Nikita grabbed hold of the lapels of Michael’s jacket and drew him closer. His tongue caressed hers with infinite skill. Her entire body felt like a live wire as energy coursed through every cell. Michael’s touch made her weak in the knees. His kiss made her want to fuse her body to his for all eternity. Eight years and she felt like she was coming home. The power of their connection had not dissipated one bit with the passage of time.
“Michael,” his name, breathy and full of awe, was a prayer.
She wrapped her arms tightly around his neck. His own arms went around her waist. They stood there soaking in each other’s bodies.
“Take me home.”
Their bodies, first parted by a threshold, then a hallway, then a street, a country and finally an ocean—but no more.
Michael looked up at her. She was blinding. Her head tilted back, her swans neck arched and just begging to be kissed. She used his body to give herself pleasure. Her body in turn gave him pleasure, in the symbiotic relationship of lovers.
Her cheeks were flushed and she laughed. It was a laugh filled with joy and she bent down to capture his lips. He gave himself freely to her. How could he not?
Michael’s hands roamed over every inch of skin within his reach. He dug his fingers into her thighs as she rode him. They traveled over her torso until they arrived at her undulating breasts and he cupped them. Nikita moaned in encouragement and dropped down to kiss him.
“I feel you, Michael. Everywhere…everywhere.”
Her blonde hair was a curtain of silk that surrounded them. His hands now traveled the expanse of her back, skin slick with perspiration. Michael wrapped an arm around her waist and flipped them easily; he held himself over her on his forearms.
“I’ve missed you,” It was a mantra he'd repeated numerous times already. “I need you.”
The joy he felt in her arms was immeasurable. He drove his body into hers with an intensity he hadn’t felt in years. Nikita’s arms tightened around him just as her body began to convulse with the onset of her climax. Their bodies remain intertwined, refusing to part now that they were together. When Michael spilled himself inside her, it was with such force, that he briefly questioned the reality of his situation. Nikita’s soft sigh of satisfaction and the warmth of her embrace makes him want to mark her forever.
They both slept. Their reunion exhausted them, but the wonderful familiarity of each other allowed them each a restful sleep.
When Nikita awakened it was to Michael’s tender gaze. It was the feeling of his eyes upon her that finally woke her up.
Their hands traced over warm skin—rediscovering favorite locations, tracing new scars, and cataloging the changes that eight years had brought them. This time it was without the urgency of sexual satisfaction.
“When do you go back?” Nikita finally dared to ask and break the bubble they were in.
“Tomorrow.”
Michael cupped her face and leaned in to place a kiss on her waiting lips. His forehead rested on hers, eyes closed. When he opened them, Nikita nearly wept at the beauty and emotion she saw in them.
“I want to see you again.”
His request cut her deep. She couldn’t stand the thought of wanting something she couldn’t have.
“Oh, Michael. Don’t make me say it. You know it won’t work,” Nikita started to rise. She needed to put some distance between them, but Michael sat up and followed her movement.
“It can if we want it to.”
She couldn’t look at him. His voice was so earnest. She couldn’t face him naked. Her robe was too far away, but his nearby discarded sweater carried his scent. She already smelled like him, she reasoned, so she grabbed his sweater and shielded her body from his hungry gaze.
“You expecting a lot of missions in Canada?” Her tone was bitter. She couldn’t allow herself to want. “Is Québec suddenly a hot bed for terrorist activity? You’ve never been naive, Michael. Don’t start now.”
Michael sat silent. The bedsheet barely concealed his nudity. She curled up in an armchair, far enough that she wouldn’t feel tempted to touch him. This conversation needed to be had. It was a long time coming.
“You said I’m still being watched. Do they know you’re here?”
“Yes.”
The fear she felt when Michael first appeared began to creep in. He’d assured her that she was safe. Still, she let herself fall victim to the upswell of emotion Michael’s presence had caused. Eight years of caution and now falling into Michael’s embrace could prove to be her undoing.
“They don’t care,” he tried to reassure her.
“I don’t believe that."
“It’s the truth. I have a lot more freedom than I used to, but my whereabouts must still be accounted for.”
There’s something in his voice that sets off alarms in Nikita’s head.
“Describe ‘more freedom’.”
Michael’s face was frustratingly blank. She shouldn’t have been surprised but she was. Michael had been cautious at times but not once had he retreated behind the stoic mask that was his trademark.
“Michael, you can’t sleep with me and then keep me in the dark.”
She had never expected full disclosure, but she did expect to be reasonably informed. She trusted Michael to keep her safe, but she wasn’t going to blindly accept it.
“I’ve never been of the opinion that ignorance does anyone any favors.”
“It does in this case.”
“No, no I won’t do that,” she said emphatically. “If that’s the way it has to be, then this stops right now.” Nikita could feel tears starting to gather, but she’ll be damned if she was going to let them fall. She refused to be led around blind after all these years.
“Do you like your life here, Nikita?”
“Yes, I do.”
“That’s why I can’t tell you.”
“Can’t or won’t. You can’t protect me from reality. I want to know exactly how the Section describes freedom nowadays.”
They sat in silence for a while, neither one of them willing to give up their argument. Nikita quietly began to mourn the loss of the night’s euphoria. She sighed deeply and ran her hands absently over the soft fabric of Michael’s sweater.
“What do you want out of this, Michael?” Her voice was soft in the quiet room. “What is this? Did you just come looking for a good lay?”
Nikita saw him flinch ever so slightly.
“Don’t say that,” his whispered answer was harsh. “Don’t reduce yourself or us to that. You’re so much more.”
The passion in his voice was startling.
“‘Us?’ There can’t be an ‘us’ if you’re not honest with me. I ask you again, what is this?”
“It’s a chance to be together.” There was so much conviction in his voice. Michael believed in what he was saying. Tiny embers that fanned the flames of possibilities began to grow inside her.
“How? I’m here and you’re still in France I assume. There’s more than just an ocean between us. Section is not known for its benevolence.”
“Those obstacles no longer apply, but it would have to be long distance,” he conceded. “At least for a while.”
“And then what? I move? You move? We keep it casual with me in the dark until you’re killed or when worrying about you kills me.”
“I’m not getting killed.”
There it was again, Michael’s arrogance. How could he continue to be surprised that he could somehow die?
“Excuse me if I’m not as confident as you. The possibility of death is always there, and I refuse to go into this blind. I’m going to want answers. To know more than what you are willing to give me.”
Michael sat there, frustratingly silent, a beautiful and silent statue with only the emotion in his eyes suggesting at what was beneath the surface.
“There are also other considerations.” Nikita hesitated. She was reluctant to bring up the one thing that she had often wondered about. “Michael…eight years is a long time. We’re not the same people, not really.”
At her words, she noticed the green in his eyes shifted with increased attentiveness.
“What if all this time what we’ve been holding on to is an idealized version of each other? We were together under some extraordinary and heightened circumstances. It could have just magnified everything. We weren’t normal people living normal lives.”
“You don’t want this?”
Hurt flickered across his face before it disappeared as quickly as it had appeared.
“I’m not saying that,” She stood up and walked back towards him. She sat back down next to him but maintained some distance between them on the bed. “I just want us to go into this with our eyes open.”
She reached for his hand and cupped it between her own. She kissed her way across the ridge of his knuckles. She looked at him, imploring him to understand.
“What if all we really had was Section? What if without it we’re really not as compatible as we thought we were? You can’t say you haven’t thought about it. The strategist in you wouldn’t let yourself deny that possibility, no matter how unpleasant.
Michael sat quietly and let her speak her innermost thoughts aloud.
“You know I’ve often wondered where we’d be if I’d stayed in Section. The world is such a different place now from when I was an operative. I feel it’s much more dangerous for people in our line of work. Would either one of us still be alive or would something much more mundane break us apart. All those Section mandated lies could have broken us.”
Michael reached for her face with both hands and brought their foreheads together.
“Do you want to be together? Independent of everything else, do you want to do this?”
“But how…”
“Yes or no, forget everything else.” He leaned forward and captured her lips in a slow and lingering kiss. “There’s just you and there’s just me. Do you want to do this?”
“Why would Oversight, who had put so many restrictions, necessary restrictions, suddenly be so flexible as to allow us to be together?”
“Because I am Oversight.”
Michael as Oversight was something Nikita had never considered. He had long been groomed to take over Section One as Operations. Suddenly all of Michael’s boldness towards her these last few months snapped into focus.
Michael looked at her intently. He appeared to be involved in an internal debate before he spoke.
“After the attacks on New York and Washington an evaluation of the Sections was held. We’d failed. Everyone had failed. There was outrage at the intelligence community—CIA, MI-6, Mossad. With all our resources we couldn’t prevent the one thing we were tasked to do.”
There was an intensity in Michael’s eyes. It was similar to the focused attention he’d give complicated situations when out in the field as he worked through the data of his profiles.
“One thing that was determined was that there was too much internal squabbling. Too much politicking for individual gain. Section had lost sight of what its true objective was.”
“Operations?”
“And Madeline. It only increased as time went by and others outside Section were taking notice. It turns out they weren’t the only ones jockeying for more control. They were just the most ambitious.”
Nikita leaned forward captivated by the scenario Michael was outlining. So much had happened in the years since she’d been out.
“They’d both become distracted and were no longer focused on our intended purpose. They used to keep each other in check. They started feeding into each other’s most destructive tendencies. Their paranoia grew. They went after us because they thought we were plotting to take over Section.”
Michael reached for her hand and placed an open mouthed kiss on her palm.
“During that time all I could think about was touching you and having you all to myself,” Michael confessed. “In finding the right missions to maneuver around so that we could steal an hour together.”
Nikita remembered that time vividly. It was a high wire act they were engaged in. She oscillated between fear and desire at any given time.
“I’d say their suspicions were ridiculous, but Madeline once fed me a line about how you being less than perfect could be destructive. That our relationship made you a danger.”
“They were delusional. They centered in on us because they felt threatened.”
Nikita laughed bitterly, “They couldn’t believe that we just wanted to be together. They had to ascribe us an ulterior motive to justify their own actions.”
Michael kissed her palm one more time before lowering her hand.
“To be fair, they may not have been far off.”
At that, Nikita’s back straightened.
“It was one scenario. I have never wanted to take control of Section by force. My time would have come naturally, but if Operations and Madeline remained inflexible to us being together, I was prepared to explore other alternatives. Building a case with Oversight for their removal was not outside the realm of possibility.”
Nikita couldn’t believe what she was hearing. That Michael had considered leading a coup within Section if it allowed them to be together was extraordinary.
“So the Sections came under evaluation,” Nikita asked, needing to be distracted from Michael’s revelation. “What happened? I didn’t just fall through the cracks. I was a loose end. Why was I spared?”
“After the evaluations were completed, Operations and Madeline were reassigned. I was given control of Section One. It was a dark time. Al Qaeda’s success emboldened everyone else to step up their activity. Not to mention the lone actors. You were right when you said you were being monitored. It was part of the program’s failsafes. I asked for and received regular updates on your progress. Eventually George wanted to discuss the efficacy of the pilot program. He hadn’t forgotten it, merely cast it aside as a low priority.”
“You said the program had been suspended.”
“By that point, yes. There were failures, despite how closely everyone was vetted. It was considered a program for a simpler time. A time we were no longer in. It was viewed as an indulgence.”
“And you convinced them to leave me alone.”
“I didn’t have to do much. You convinced them. I just had to highlight your successes.”
Michael’s words made her heart clench. For so long she’d felt like a failure. Praise from Michael never failed to make her emotional.
“George agreed that you should be left alone to enjoy your freedom. We also agreed that surveillance of you should be reduced but not eliminated.”
Even from afar Michael was still protecting her.
“I suspect that if you hadn’t gotten out when you did, you very likely would have been brought back in. Resources were being expended on keeping tabs on you. Resources that were needed elsewhere. However, too much time had gone by. You’d left Paris. Living in London. Three years. Recalling you, reprogramming you. That would have cost us resources as well.
“It would have been easier to cancel me,” she commented unnerved. The reality of how close she came to her worst fears was incredibly sobering. “Couldn’t track me on the outside. Couldn’t afford to reprogram me on the inside.”
“Yes.”
Nikita looked out her bedroom window into the dark of night. In the quiet of her bedroom, if felt like the entire world had been enveloped in silence. She and Michael were the only ones allowed this hushed conversation. “You know during that time I was still incredibly paranoid. I feared exactly what you were outlining.”
Michael placed a reassuring hand on her upper arm. He squeezed lightly and it drew her attention back to him.
“Had you’d only had marginal success in the outside, it would have been an easy decision. Yes, you had setbacks, but your accomplishments were encouraging and far ahead of any of the other participants. You had your freedom and you made the best of it.”
Nikita’s eyes teared at Michael’s praise. He studied her for what seemed like ages.
“In his last years at Oversight, George had been having health issues and he started vetting candidates from his shortlist to replace him. Operations…Paul was originally on that list. So was I. The stability of Section One was paramount and removing me would have jeopardized that, but George was interested.”
“And were you?”
“Yes and no. I knew I was capable and I wanted the challenge. All I had was the work. It became my life more so than it was before. Heading Section One gave me access. You see, I too am guilty of using Section for personal reasons. I used its resources to monitor those I cared about. To ensure you all remained safe.”
“Adam and Elena.”
“And my sister and her family.”
Michael and his heart. It’s the one thing people misunderstood about him. He wasn’t heartless. He felt so much that he had to hide it behind an impenetrable wall. She had been guilty of misunderstanding him as well.
“So you were promoted to Oversight.”
“Yes.”
“And that’s where your ‘more freedom’ comes from. You’re the new ‘George’.”
Michael’s eyes showed amusement at the way she put it.
“You can’t just pick up and go whenever you want, though. You shoulder a lot of responsibility.”
“Yes,” Michael moved closer to her on the bed and reached over to cup her face. “But I’m also allowed some flexibility with what I do with my personal life. I oversee the Sections. The work is demanding but not all consuming. It’s been my choice to devote all my time to Oversight. It’s not a mandate.”
Michael’s fingers moved to toy with the hemline of the sweater she wore. His nails grazed her upper thighs where they meet the garment.
He looked up at a her. The corners of his lips quirked up slightly.
“Plus, I have access to a private jet and private airfields.”
Nikita let out an amused and breathy laugh. “Ahh, the perks of the influential and powerful.”
Michael smiled back at her, amused with her assessment of his privilege. Nikita could feel his hand slowly slip underneath the sweater and squeeze her upper thigh. His thumb hypnotically caressed the sensitive skin near the apex of her legs.
“I’m a civilian. How would your involvement with a civilian affect the secrecy of the work you do?”
“It would likely be difficult, and would require a certain amount of agreed upon mystery, but you’re not a true civilian. Details would have to remain off the table, but you understand the importance of discretion.”
“No shop talk as pillow talk, huh,” Nikita teased. Her hand found Michael’s bare knee and her fingers drew figure eights across his skin.
“Would you have to divulge the nature of our relationship. I imagine repeated trips to Montréal would get suspicious.”
Michael’s delicate ministrations of her body were distracting. She struggled to remained focused on their conversation. In turn, she itched to discard the bedsheet covering Michael’s body. The heat of him called to her.
“I’d inform them,” His voice had taken a noticeably husky timbre. Clearly she was not the only one affected by the simple sensuality of a lover’s touch. “I have no desire to hide you…or us, if you’ll have me.”
That was the big question, was she willing to step back into Section One’s periphery of her own free will to be with Michael? It was a huge leap of faith to take. While it appeared that neither Section or Oversight were a real threat to her, caution was never a bad thing.
She sought her answer in Michael’s eyes. The tenderness and need she saw in them were too much for anyone to withstand. All these years, suppressing her need for him and seeking a comparable substitution did her no favors.
In that moment, she did the only thing she could, she kissed him.
She put so much into that kiss. The warmth and pliancy of Michael’s lips, the velvety texture of his tongue as it sought hers out, the pleasant scratchiness of his facial hair—Nikita wanted him so much. Being in Michael’s arms again felt so incredibly right.
Michael wanted this. She felt him vibrate with need for her.
“My body recognized you,” he whispered seductively into her ear. “Just like yours did mine.”
Michael hadn’t lost his touch. A wave of arousal so strong came over her.
Michael’s fingers skimmed up the inside of his sweater. A pair of hands cupped her breasts and she arched into his touch. A low whimper escaped her lips.
Nikita sought out his mouth and he was there ready to receive her.
Michael removed the garment, her hair spilling around her and she was once again bare before him.
They kissed once more and Nikita swept the bedsheet that lay across Michael’s lap aside. She reached for the prominent arousal she’d uncovered and stroked him slowly. Michael’s eyes fluttered shut and for a few moments she basked in the gift of touching Michael like this. It was over too soon when Michael removed her hand from his body and kissed her palm in thanks.
His eyes promised sensual things and he eased them both back until Michael’s back was against the headboard and he spooned around her.
His lips were sweet as they skimmed the side of her face and down her neck. His hands roamed over her body, testing the weight of her breasts, tickling her torso and holding her open between his own open legs.
She felt safe and desired nestled in Michael’s arms as he used his touch to seduce her. He held her open in a wanton display of sexual instinct. With Michael’s encouragement, her fingers played between her legs and she arched her body against his as the passion within her build.
“You’re so beautiful,” Michael whispered in her ear.
His hands were full of her breasts as Nikita squirmed in his arms and thrust them out against his hands. She’d abandoned her clit and instead held onto his outer thighs in an attempt to focus herself. When she squeezed, she felt his strong muscles beneath her fingers and a rush of desire pooled in her sex. Michael’s body was her sanctuary.
When one of his hands trailed down her torso and settled between her legs, she arched her head deep against his shoulder. Her gasp of pleasure came out strained and low. His hand concentrated on the harden nub between her legs. The other stimulated her breast and tightened around its sensitive peak. Michael’s hot lips trailed along her neck and shoulder. Nikita craned her own neck back in search of Michael’s skin. Her lips on his short beard provided a fascinating new element to their lovemaking.
She felt utterly under Michael’s control. His body dictated every single one of the pleasures he was giving her. It felt so good.
Her body rolled in time with the rhythm he established on her clit. It was absolutely maddening.
She could also feel him hot and ready against her lower back. His cock against her was a constant reminder of his arousal and the effect she was having on him.
“Talk to me, Nikita,” His voice was low and seductive. “Tell me…”
She whimpered instead and Michael tightened his fingers on her nipple, causing her to cry out in pleasure.
“Oh!”
“I’m waiting.”
He latched onto her neck and sucked on her skin.
“So good…,” she barely managed out. “Michael…” her breath hitched. “God.”
Her body was on fire. Every place that Michael touched burned so intensely. She ran her hands up and down Michael’s strong thighs as she sought somewhere to ground herself from the intense pleasure he was coaxing out of her.
He adjusted slightly so that two of his fingers sought entrance to her core and slowly pumped inside her.
“I’d dream about you. I’d see you in the halls. I’d see you on the street.”
Hearing Michael’s words were having the desired effect. She was so close. Her body rocked and rolled as Michael’s hands continued their assault. Whimpers of need continued to erupt from her lips.
She feared bruising Michael where she held on to him. When her hands landed on the bedsheets, she grasped tightly as she teetered on the precipice of her climax.
Nikita arched her head back seeking Michael’s kiss. His mouth was sin and his tongue caressed hers erotically. She never wanted this moment to end. She would happily spend the rest of her days in Michael’s arms. She withered against his tortuous and talented hands.
“Come for me, Nikita. Share it with me.”
She could no longer find the necessary purchase her body needed. She was uncontrollable as Michael continued to manipulate delicious pleasure out of her.
“Please…close…please,” she whined in desperation.
When she came she marveled at Michael’s ability to drive her to the point of insanity.
Short ragged gasps overcame her as her vaginal walls began to spasm against Michael’s thrusting fingers.
Michael swallowed her cry of pleasure and took it into himself. His kissed her as her orgasm swept over her, leaving her open in heart and body.
Boneless and spent, Michael eased her down onto the bed. Her hand buried itself in his thick hair and dragged him down to her. She kissed him slowly. Her tongue swept into his mouth and curled around his. Her other hand slipped between their bodies in search of his arousal. She found him pulsating and leaking. He thrust into the tight grip of her hand and moaned his approval.
Michael broke their kiss and she whimpered in disappointment.
He buried his face in her neck. Warm lips peppered her skin with hot kisses. His teeth nipped at her before he soothed her with his tongue. Her jawline, her neck, her throat—Michael neglected none of them before he worked his way down the valley between her breasts.
“Right here,” he pressed his lips around an areole. It tingled and her nipple further tightened at the proximity. “You’re beautiful here.”
“And right here,” the underside of her breast. “So beautiful.” He used his nose to playfully nudge the pliant flesh. His lips insistently latched onto the curve of her breast and Michael sucked greedily. There was going to be a mark there tomorrow.
“Here,” he switched to her other breast and he cupped it between his lips and a possessive hand, “Here too.”
Michael nipped at her and Nikita whimpered in need.
“I’ve dreamt about your breasts.”
Nikita laughed in confusion at Michael’s very odd comment as it penetrated through the haze of desire.
“It’s true,” He rose on his forearms to drop a quick kiss to her lips. Amusement danced in his sparkling eyes. “They’re perfect.”
Oh God. A playful Michael might be too much for her to handle.
Smiling, Michael kissed her again. When he moved, Nikita lips instinctually followed his.
“I’d recall every part of you in vivid detail. The curve of your shoulder, your nose, your wrist.”
“Michael…please,” she sobbed, needing the fulfillment of his body.
“Not yet. I’m not done.”
Michael slowly kissed his way down her body. He shared with her his memories of his favorite spots.
He tented her legs and he nibbled down her thighs. His long fingers massaged her calves.
“You hold so much power over me, Nikita. I wouldn’t have it any other way. I live a richer life when you’re in it.”
She rocked her hips up in frustration. She needed more than just the teasing touches he was giving her.
“I need…I need…please.”
His fingers parted her folds and Michael gave her an experimental lick, tasting her.
“You taste the same,” he half whispered to himself before he looked up her flushed body. His tongue darted out and lapped at her intimately. Nikita moaned at the sensation of Michael’s mouth on her sex. When he finally latched his heavenly mouth onto her clitoris she bucked her lower body off the bed in ecstasy.
Nikita moaned as if in pain and she tightened her grasp on Michael’s hair, encouraging him to never stop touching her body the way he did.
She was so close…so very close. Michael could give her her orgasm, but he held back. He lifted his face to look at her and she wanted to cry in frustration. His eyes were dark and lust filled. He inserted two fingers into her and she clenched her vaginal muscles around him. Nikita almost missed the slight smirk he gave her when he smoothed one hand down the length of her legs.
His fingers moved in an out of her, stimulating her vaginal walls expertly. He watched her with dark eyes, taking in every sensual cue her body was giving him. He looked like he wanted to devour her.
Finally…finally Michael encircled her clit once more with his mouth, but this time he worked her with her release in mind.
It didn’t take long and Nikita came as Michael relentlessly pleasured her with his lips and his fingers.
She took in deep gulps of air as she watched Michael with uncontrollable desire.
She could see the power of his body as he rose above hers. Strong pectorals, a slim waist, and a powerful and enticingly heavy cock emerging from within his pubic hair. His thighs and calves, which she’d always loved, flexed with contained strength. God, he was beautiful. She needed him desperately. To hold his strength within her and to reaffirm that he was hers alone.
When his mouth dropped to her right breast, Nikita sighed in pleasure. His hand found her left one and he intertwined their fingers before he brought them to rest alongside her head. He squeezed her hand and held it as Michael’s lips slowly once again drove her to near insanity.
Her hips undulated beneath him. He held her down, denying her the friction she desired.
“Enough,” she threatened. “Or I’m kicking you out.”
She may no longer storm chemical plants but Nikita was still athletic. She wrapped her legs around him and leveraged herself so that she could roll them over. She rose over Michael’s strong body triumphant.
Michael reached up and weaved his fingers through her hair above her ear and swept it over her shoulder.
“Too much?”
“Not enough,” she countered.
Nikita held his thick arousal in the palm of her hand. He was silken strength and as she stroked him, Michael leaned his head back, revealing the long line of his throat as he moaned in pleasure. She loved seeing Michael like this. He trusted her enough to show her this side of him. He put himself literally in her hands. The head of his cock leaked and Nikita watched as the pearlescent liquid slowly streamed down the side. Feeling devilish, she eased back and laid on her stomach between his legs. With her forearms resting upon his upper thighs, Nikita leaned down to lick around the head. Michael jerked at the sensation and another moan erupted from deep in his chest.
Michael’s eyes were squeezed shut but when he opened them, Nikita was struck by the strength of the passion she saw in them. She dropped her head once more and wrapped her mouth around the head of his arousal and sucked. Their eyes never left each other as she pleasured Michael with the heat of her mouth.
“Nikita…”
That had always been one of her most favorites sounds in the world. Michael moaning her name with passion as she gave him the pleasure his body deserved. She smiled against him as she continued moving her mouth against him. Her hand also moved as she wrapped it around him where her mouth could not reach.
She could feel the power of him beneath her hands as he tried to control himself but she could nevertheless feel his hips twitch slightly below him. He was trying desperately to not thrust into her mouth and only having partial success.
Suddenly rising, she sunk down and took him inside her, replacing the heat of her mouth with the heat of her body. It stretched deliciously to accommodate him and they both moaned at the feeling of completion.
She again sought out his lips as she rose up and down over him. Their kiss was passionate and adoring. She didn’t dare close her eyes and she watched Michael’s eyes burn for her. Her fingers rarely strayed from his face as she held him to her. The texture of his short beard, both soft and prickly, tickled her fingers. She delighted in the sensation. He was real and he was here. He was hers.
In between decadent kisses, between their lips languidly stroking each other, they breathed each other in. Every moan, every whimper, every gasp traveled the short distance between them. It was almost too much. What she felt was like nothing else she’d ever experienced. No one else could make her feel the way Michael could. She felt cherished. She felt powerful. She felt complete.
Nikita ran her hands over his chest and arms, feeling the tension and strength coiled there. Michael’s hands tightened their grip on her rear as she moved over him, signaling his tenuous handle on his infamous control. She was close too. Nikita straightened her body. Their release wasn’t far and their coupling took on a frenzied pace.
“Michael…”
The dance their bodies were engaged in was driving them both delirious with passion. They scrambled for purchase. Hands roaming and gripping skin in an increasing need to satisfy themselves and each other.
Michael rose suddenly and flipped them back over. The look of hunger in eyes caused her breath to hitch.
The movement had caused him to slip out of her but he entered her in one swift thrust, filling her to completion with his body once again. Her legs went up to frame his hips and together they moved in search of fulfillment. Thrust after thrust ignited their bodies with the ultimate pleasure.
The look in Michael’s eyes was almost too much. His mouth covered hers and they moaned in need. There was so much power in Michael’s thrusts. When it finally hit, her orgasm swelled over her with great ferocity. Her body was overly sensitized. Every point of contact with Michael’s body—his stomach against hers, his hips cradled by her legs, his chest pressed against her breast—was too much and not enough. He continued to rock inside her as her inner muscles tried to coax his own release from him.
“You,” her voice quivered with heart wrenching emotion as she fisted his hair and pulled his mouth down to hers. Their kiss was violent and desperate in its need. He answered her call with equal ferocity.
Her eyes were glazed and unseeing.
“Don’t ask me to leave,” Michael voice was rough with emotion. His accent thickened every word. “Put a bullet in my heart instead.”
His plea was manipulative but no less heartfelt.
“I love you,” he confessed in a husky whisper.
“I love you,” Nikita answered back. Tears shimmered in Michael’s eyes. She knew that her eyes mirrored his.
“Nikita…” he groaned against her lips before he too reached his climax.
The violence in them had dissipated. Michael had collapsed upon her. Nikita wrapped her arms around him and refused to let him go. She could feel the tremors of his orgasm lightly reverberate across his body. She soothed the once strained muscles of his back with her touch.
His weight upon her was soothing. She’d spent eight years without the comfort of his strength. Eight years with a hole inside her that could only be filled by Michael.
Eventually Michael rolled them over and she settled against him. She ran her hand across his hip and thigh to reassure herself that he wasn’t going anywhere.
Their next kiss was tender. Laughter bubbled up from within Nikita’s chest as she buried her face against his collarbone. Michael shared in her joy and allowed his own laughter. His warm chuckle tickled her ear. He once again gifted her with his beautiful smile.
Their arms and legs intertwined, they each felt the other’s beating heart. Michael took one of her hands and held it in one of his own.
“I love you,” he repeated and kissed her fingers reverently.
Nikita nuzzled into his neck where the scent of Michael—sweat and masculine musk was at its most potent. His pulse beat strongly underneath her lips.
“Out of everything,” Michael kissed her fingers one last time before lowering them to his heart. “You were the most beautiful to me when you offered me friendship…a friendly ear for me to talk or to not talk.”
“We sat in silence a lot.” She tenderly ran a finger from her other hand across his brow and down his face.
“Yes. It was more than what I deserved.”
“What you deserved was compassion and understanding,” she said vehemently. “You carried so much weight on your shoulders. The least anyone could do was not make things difficult for you. I’m sorry that I did.”
“I kept so much from you. You had incomplete information.”
“Doesn’t make it right.”
Nikita traced her fingers over Michael’s chest, lightly disturbing the sparse chest hair he had.
“You keep mentioning how successful I was at leaving Section behind, at living a normal life. But I wasn’t. Not really. If I was really ready to move on I would have accepted Marc’s invitation to move out West with him. Logically, I knew I was never going to see you again, but I wasn’t ready to let you go. You were still in my heart.”
“You dated for two years,” he offered. “Perhaps if you’d known him longer…”
Nikita placed her fingers on his lips to stop his words.
“Don’t put me on a pedestal, Michael. I can’t live there. The truth is, I clung to the memory of a relationship with you, while allowing another man to fall in love with me. I was stringing him along without truly realizing it. He didn’t deserve that. It was only the possibility of moving across the county with him that made me realize the injustice I was doing him.”
Michael continued to touch her reverently as she continued to self-recriminate.
“Michael, I was infatuated with you from the beginning. I resented your hold over me, but it was there. I was yours.”
He lovingly tucked a strand of hair behind her ear before he before he thumbed her delicate earlobe. “I found myself caring when before you there was just emptiness. Just the job. For me, there’s before you and after you.”
Nikita kissed him deeply. They’d been through so much together. It had always been Michael. It will always be Michael.
“It would hurt to look at you. I’d walk by and hear your laughter. It was music and I was instantly jealous of the person you were sharing it with. And I was angry with myself and with Section for forcing me to feign indifference. You were hidden away. I hid you away, somewhere deep, so deep inside of my heart.”
“Michael…”
She dropped kisses on his chest before she leaned towards him and kissed him on the lips. “I’m right here. We’re here together.”
Nikita looked into Michael’s eyes, his ever changing eyes.
“I’ll never truly know the type of pressure you’re under will I?”
“Only vagaries, at best.”
Michael ran the back of his hand along her cheek.
“Can you accept that?”
“I’ll have to, if it means having you.”
Michael searched for further confirmation at what she was saying.
“I want to do this. I want to be with you.”
Michael’s eyes lit up in pleasure and his lips curled into a pleased smile before he kissed her thoroughly.
“You’ll tell me, right? If there’s anything I can do to help. I want to support you in any way I can.”
“I’ll let you know. I promise.”
For moments they quietly reveled in their decision. Their bodies pressed against each other and their skin flushed with their proximity to each other.
“So how will this work?” Nikita questioned. “How do we get reacquainted with each other?”
Michael skimmed one of his hands down her back and cupped her bottom, pressing her towards him.
Nikita moaned softly before she laughed and playfully hit his shoulder.
“I don’t mean that and you know it.”
“We date,” he said simply.
“What?”
“We spend time together. We learn more about each other, as we are now. It’s what we never really got to do.”
“Only somewhat.”
“Dinner,” Michael proposed. “Only this time we arrive together.”
“And leave together?”
“That would be my preference.”
“And after dinner? You know one can’t live on good sex alone,” she teased, trailing a single finger down the center of his chest to the top of his groin.
“Only good?”
“Hmm,” she smiled seductively. “Earth shattering,” She dropped a kiss on his lips. “Knee knocking,” Another kiss tugged at his lower lip. “Toe curling,” she rubbed her nude body provocatively against him. “Life affirming sex.”
“Love making,” Michael corrected her, his eyes dark with barely restrained passion.
Nikita responded with a charming and goofy smile, pleased with the strength of Michael’s reaction.
“I can shift my work around. I don’t have to be in Oversight to get my job done. I can spend more time here with you.”
“You’re definitely going to spoil me with all this unadulterated access.”
She kissed him again. She was feeling greedy.
“So you’ve been monitoring Adam and Elena,” she asked, curious about a comment he’d made earlier in the night.
“Yes.”
“How are they?” She asked, genuinely curious.
“My son’s a teenager,” he revealed, with a voice tinged with marvel. “Elena has been doing a wonderful job.”
“Have you thought about reaching out to them?”
“No, it’s for the best that I don’t.”
“But why?”
Nikita remembered with startling clarity the pain Michael went through at the loss of Adam. Michael deserved the privilege of holding his son in his arms.
“It would only open up old wounds. It’s for the best. Adam has his mother. Elena remarried not too long ago. They’re happy.”
He looked at her thoughtfully and played idly with the ends of her hair.
“If you had been involved with someone, I wouldn’t have approached you. I had no intention of complicating your life.”
“And yet you did, in an entirely different way.”
He nodded his head in contention to her point.
“So we’re really doing this?”
Oddly enough, it was the same question she asked Michael all those years ago when they decided to try having a relationship. Michael was a sensual vision as he laid nude and sleepy in her bed.
“I want to be with you,” He responded. “I want the relationship we were denied for so long. There’s no future if you’re not in it. It’s non-negotiable. We do this together. Always.”
“I can get on board with that.”
Nikita curled up against him. Her fingers lightly scratched at his abdomen.
“You didn’t really read The Hunger Games did you?”
“Of course I did.”
“Why?”
“Because you recommended it.”
“As a joke. I wondered how seriously you’d take my choices if I offered up a book aimed at teenagers.”
“The recommendation seemed genuine.”
Nikita laughed warmly and leaned over to kiss him.
“I read them all. All your recommendations. I have them by my bedside table. Every time I see them, I think of you.”
“Good thing I work in a bookstore. There’s plenty more where they came from.”
“I’ll keep them here. I plan to wake up with you in my arms as many nights as possible.”
Epilogue
They parted reluctantly the following day but with the knowledge that they would see each other again.
True to his word, Michael did inform Centre of his intention to start a relationship with Nikita. He received an expected amount of push back but ultimately, as long as discretion remained paramount and his work continued unimpeded, then Michael was free to pursue a romantic relationship with someone outside the structure of their organization.
He returned to her and Nikita’s arms welcomed him home. Home was with Nikita. It was where his heart resided.
Every time they made love, Michael would watch Nikita shatter into a thousand pieces. Each one of them precious.
The walls that existed in his life disappeared when faced with the reality of each other. Nikita was everything. This stubborn and brilliant woman was predicted to be his downfall. Instead, she was his salvation. He wasn’t letting her go. Not again. Never again.
He liked discovering the newer facets to Nikita that had developed during their time apart. She, in turn, took comfort in knowing that as Oversight, Michael was no longer in harm’s way. He visited the various Sections with great regularity. The world around them had changed and Michael, as expected, thrived under the intense pressure. His tactical experience continued to prove invaluable. When paired with his analytical mind, he was a formidable yet enigmatic presence in the intelligence community.
“Hey there, handsome,” Nikita would call out when he’d visit her at the bookstore. Their public greetings were disciplined but no less heartfelt.
Nikita’s eyes would light up with mischief as she led him deep into the bookstore’s stacks and gave him a very well received welcome back. He’d press her body against the shelves and bury his nose in the crook of her neck. Feather light kisses were placed on her skin and her fingers tightened on his shoulder. When their lips finally met, a huge wave of relief would course through him. Finally, he could relax with the knowledge that he was back in Nikita’s steady arms.
It took them eight years to find their way back to each other and they weren’t about to waste any more time. They would shape their world to their liking.
It was a world where they were free to love each other; everything else was just details.
-30-