"It was a constant. There aren’t a lot of those in his life, these days."
- my dude my dude i relate sm i wanna cry
"Maybe he sees that Ash hasn’t been sleeping, that there’s a bruise on his collarbone from that tumble off a cliff, that he died, again, and he’s still trying to relearn how to breathe."
:(((( he died, again. the commas, man, the commas, they're doing so much. also the bruise. and relearning how to breathe and trying, trying.
- the repetition of aftermath. i can't--it's--so sad. so hard. it's picking up after everything has happened, it's discovering that the world just keeps going, just keeps going, even when you're stopped. it's that he's gone through this a million times and he knows how it goes but it's never any easier. it's an aftermath. and soon it will be an after-aftermath.
-"Ash remembers standing there, feeling sixteen, feeling a million years old, feeling stupid and feeling pissed off and aching with cold. The legendary had almost brought down the mountain with its rage once it was released, and it had been everything Ash could do to calm it down.
He remembers dying. He remembers gasping back to life with Pikachu’s frozen tears in the collar of his coat."
- flying furgeroony my friend. feeling sixteen but a million years old. the contrasts and i know this feeling and i do not like this feeling. ash hates the cold and he's always died in cold and--it's always freezing to death! Pikachu's frozen tears. I'm crying brb
"This is an aftermath. This is just fine."
- he knows it's the end, that it's well and done, and he should be fine. but he's not letting himself feel and it's--pain, my friend, you are making me hurt
"It’s just that he keeps dying, and he’d like it to matter to people outside of Pikachu, his pokemon, and his mom if it sticks. To really matter. Ash wants people to know that he has been here, walked this green earth and loved it. Fought battles and won. "
- :(((
"The panic never lasts very long. This is an aftermath, and soon enough there will be an after-aftermath, and Ash and Pikachu will be fine. It’s routine, by now, these shakes that come and fade after death, after gasping back to life. He’s pretty good at dealing, by now."
- i was talking to social worker today about how the bad stuff always passes. it's always been like--it's bad. it's really bad. but then you wait, and then it's better, but it doesn't change that it's bad now, and even though you know you should just wait it out you can't. this--it's like this. the panic never lasts very long. it's routine. he knows it, but he is still hurting. he shouldn't have to be good at dealing by now. he shouldn't have to be.
i really like my catching inches line, and I'm not sure why. i do know I was def thinking of you when I wrote it <3
awww dude i'm sorry. I hope you find things that are steady to hold you when everything else shakes *hugs*
*me, obsessively putting commas everywhere i NEED the reader to pause* YOU WILL TAKE THESE WORDS AS INTENDED OR SO HELP ME-
I have lost sleep thinking about how traumatized this kid is someone please give him therapy T.T
I am glad I could provide all the angst :) but also?? i thought freezing to death only happened with Victini? and that one episode?? where else. WHERE ELSE..
Ash aside, that sounds rough my good bean. Sending you so much love and affection from my corner of the globe. I hope that whenever the dark times come there's a sunrise waiting. That you are worthy of such light in your life *very gentle hug*
Thank you as always for your loveliness. You're a gem <3
well, not necessarily freezing but it’s always cold!! but like. being turned to stone? cold. drowning? like, so many times?? cold. that time when he almost freezes and all his pokemon help him get through in the original series? cold. and then victini too. and also there have been multiple fics i’ve read with original stories. where ash freezes.
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imaginaryinspiration on Chapter 1 Sat 21 Aug 2021 05:08AM UTC
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MashpotatoeQueen on Chapter 1 Fri 27 Aug 2021 06:14AM UTC
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MashpotatoeQueen on Chapter 1 Tue 31 Aug 2021 06:11AM UTC
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