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Lorne laid the fault of this particular clusterfuck squarely at McKay's feet. "Why didn't you just say that the Colonel was your's?" Lorne hissed at him.
Sheppard knelt still as death between two imposing and well-armed guards, one of whom had her free hand clutched tightly in his hair, forcing his head to bend down as far as it would go. McKay tore his guilty gaze away from the scene to wave his hands defensively at Evan. "Because he's not! They asked and I just automatically replied that I'd left Jennifer back home! How was I to know that they don't allow unclaimed subs to wander around past a certain age? That is such a Victorian attitude to take by the way, and so beneath me to even contemplate, let alone predict would happen here!"
Evan closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose, reminding himself to not grind his teeth in frustration. After the urge to slug McKay in the teeth to perhaps knock a little sense into him had passed, he dropped his hand away from his face and looked up to see Teyla had come back from her conference with the elders of the town. "Any luck convincing them to let Colonel Sheppard go yet, Teyla?" he asked her hopefully.
Teyla gave McKay a sidelong look that made him flush and look away. Turning to Evan, she replied quietly, "I have convinced them that he is owned by your military rather than by a specific dominant. But they still insist that they must see him submit to one who has authority over him before they will hand him back over to us."
Fuck, thought Evan. "The only ranking top we have that could have done that is him," he returned just as quietly, jabbing his thumb derisively at McKay, "and he's already fucked up the possibility of taking responsibility for the Colonel." McKay sputtered indignantly but fortunately for Evan's blood pressure did not say anything in response to the jab. "Woolsey certainly can't do it. He's as subby as they come."
Teyla looked at him thoughtfully. "You are the ranking dominant among the military, am I correct?"
Evan blinked. Oh. Oh no. Teyla couldn't possibility be implying what he thought she was implying. "Now wait just a minute, here," he said. He brought up a finger between the two of them and looked around to make sure no one was close enough to hear before leaning in and hissing urgently, "He's my commanding officer!"
Teyla grabbed his hand and forced it down, saying with quiet intensity, "But the Ettalans do not know that. Major, I understand that this is awkward, but it is our best option if we wish to be able to trade with these people for the naquadah that we require. You know as well as I that Colonel Sheppard would prefer a peaceful resolution to this that does not endanger our possibility of achieving a trade deal with them."
Evan longingly eyed the troop of marines that he'd brought with him, but deep down he knew that she was right. Sheppard was always willing to sacrifice his own well-being for the sake of the expedition. "How much submission are we talking about?" he asked reluctantly.
Teyla looked over to where Ronon was silently kneeling beside Sergeant Banks, the leash she was holding currently hooked into his collar. He still looked half a second away from leaping up and tearing everyone apart with his bare hands. "If he were claimed, it would have been a simple matter of his dominant coming to take possession of him like Amelia was able to do with Ronon." Teyla then returned her regard to Evan. "Unfortunately, that will not work in this case. I am afraid that you will have to do something more...forward."
"Are we talking public sex?" Evan asked, hoping that the answer was no.
Teyla dashed his hope by nodding solemnly. "That is the custom."
Evan grimaced. God, just what he needed. As much as he had fantasized about bending Sheppard over a console in the control room and fucking him senseless, those had been fantasies. The reality of making his commanding officer submit to him in a public forum did not appeal at all, especially since he strongly suspected that Sheppard had been previously abused as a sub. Combine that with the awkwardness of topping a sub who out-ranked him and was in his chain of command and it was a recipe for disaster. He looked over again to where the Colonel was being held and ran a hand through his hair, wishing that he'd never come to the Pegasus galaxy. "Damn it," he sighed.
Teyla reached up to touch him on the shoulder. "Evan, if you don't think that you can in good conscience do this..."
Evan barked out a bitter laugh. He was sure that he couldn't do this in good conscience, but he didn't really have a choice that would make the situation any less FUBAR. "Can I at least speak with Sheppard first so I can make sure I don't do anything to him that I'll really, really regret later?"
"We will speak to the elders together and request it," Teyla replied and started back toward the knot of people sitting in the shade. With one last sour look directed at McKay, Evan followed her.
"Major Lorne is the top ranking dominant of the military to which Colonel Sheppard belongs," Teyla said by way of introduction to the elder council of the town as she gestured towards him. Evan made sure that his game face was firmly in place. "And he agrees to claim him publicly, but requires that he speak with the Colonel alone first."
A wizened old stick of a man bristled. "And why would he need to do that? It is a simple claiming!"
Evan narrowed his eyes at the man and replied in a measured, deadly tone, "Because I don't rape unwilling subs."
The old man sneered and opened his mouth to say something else, but stopped when the elderly woman beside him slapped him in the shins with her cane. "Peace, Deren! It is abundantly obvious a people who would allow a submissive within their warrior ranks would have different customs." The man scowled back at her, but held his peace. The woman peered up at Evan. "You may go check your submissive's health and well-being and gain his willingness for the claiming." She smacked the man in the shins again and muttered, "Really, Deren, must you be such a trial? You would have all our trading partners think us barbarians by your lack of manners." The two other elders on either side of them smirked.
Evan gave them a short nod in thanks and went over to where the guards were holding Sheppard. He looked at both of them evenly. "The elders said that I could see to his well-being and speak with him alone."
The female guard looked over to the elders and the old lady waved her cane in approval. She then shoved Sheppard toward him slightly as she let go of his hair before she and the other guard walked away. Sheppard remained on his knees, his head still bowed.
Evan knelt down on one knee next to Sheppard and felt a cold knot settle in his stomach as he examined him. Sheppard was breathing in short rapid breaths and shaking minutely. Then he jerked suddenly and words started tumbling from his lips, his tone one of abject pleading, "Please, Nancy, please, no, I have maneuvers tomorrow. Please don't, not that, please..."
Shit, Sheppard was having a flashback, a really bad one. Evan felt nauseated to see his suspicion confirmed so unambiguously. He reached out, stroked the shivering man's arm gently and said in a soothing tone, "Nancy's not here, John. She's not here. You're with me and you're safe. Do you hear me, John? She's long gone. You're with me and you're safe."
John shuddered violently and fell forward. Evan caught him in a hug and stroked his back as John shook silently within the circle of his arms. "It's okay. You're okay. Nancy's not here. We're on PX6-299 and the guards have handed you over to me. Nancy isn't here. It's a flashback that you're having, not the real thing. It's just me and I swear I won't hurt you, I promise."
Out of the corner of his eye, Evan noticed the old lady with the cane looking at them with concern and getting up. He waved her off with one hand, thinking that having any woman around John at the moment would be a bad idea. She nodded her acquiescence and stumped over to the guards instead. Gradually John's breathing slowed, his shaking stopped, and he stiffened in Evan's arms. "You okay now, sir?" Evan asked in an undertone, letting go.
"I'm fine," John rasped as he pulled away to sit back on his heels. In reality, he looked as if he'd been put through the wringer, but Evan tactfully didn't contradict him.
John's body language screamed that he wanted to be left alone and, if Evan had any choice at all, he would have gladly done so, but... "Sir, Teyla found a way for us to get you out of here, but we have a problem."
John's eyes snapped up to regard Evan darkly. "What is it?"
Evan looked over to where the old lady was now peppering the guard with questions in a querulous tone. "In order for us to maintain trade relations, you have to publicly submit."
John's breath hitched and his hands tightened into fists. "To who?"
"Teyla recommended that I pose as the CMO and have you submit to me," Evan admitted disquietly. "But I really don't feel comfortable doing that, sir. Especially right now."
John looked away from Evan at the oblique reference to his recent flashback to watch the old lady glaring narrowly at the guard as she spoke with growing nervousness. "Comfort's got nothing to do with what's best for the expedition, Major."
That was what Evan expected John to say, but the top in him rebelled at being that callous to a sub in distress. "I know that, sir, but --" He was interrupted by the old lady giving the female guard an almighty wallop on the head with her cane.
"You idiot!" the old lady shouted at the now bleeding guard as she staggered back from the blow. "I will deal with the rest of your punishment later!" The old lady then hobbled over to them, a thunderous look on her face.
John and Evan both stiffened in alertness. The marines, who'd been studiously looking away from their commanding officer and his XO, abruptly focused on their surroundings and surreptitiously checked their weapons. The old lady came to a halt by the two of them, muttering, "And that young pup thinks that she's an experienced dominant! I've been flogging submissives since before her parents were even born!" She placed both hands on her cane to steady herself and said earnestly, "Major Lorne, I must apologize to you for that idiot guard's behavior toward your sub. She had him under her hand and never realized that she had abused him shamefully. No truly experienced dominant in this town would have failed to realize the distress that they were causing him. Is he all right?"
"Sir, this sub is well and freely gives his submission to you at this time," Sheppard said abruptly, thrusting both wrists out to Evan in formal supplication before Evan could ask her if they could postpone or cancel the public submission rather than cause John further distress.
He gave his commanding officer a frustrated look, but went along with it, grabbing both wrists and replying, "I accept your submission."
The old lady frowned at them, apparently not taken in by Sheppard's assertion that he was fine. Evan gazed up at her, gave her a rueful look, and a 'what can you do?' shrug. "Can you give us a bit more time to discuss how we're going to do this?" He'd been forced into committing to this course of action, but he'd be damned if he started before finding out what was on Sheppard's no-go list.
"Of course," she replied firmly. "Take all the time that you require. Simply let us know when you wish to begin." She turned and slowly worked her way back to her chair in the shade.
Gripping Sheppard's wrists a little tighter, Evan frowned at him and said, "I am really not happy right now, sir."
Sheppard gave him a smirk that did not sit well on his washed out face. "Suck it up, Major. It's for the good of the expedition."
"Damn it, it's not good for you!" Evan gritted out. "You're in no position mentally for any kind of play right now. I could trigger another flashback taking you and, damn it, I don't want to do anything like that to any sub I take!"
Sheppard sighed and sagged a little in Evan's grip. "Yeah, Evan, I know. You're a good top. All the subs that play with you say so." He shifted position slightly and said, "Listen, a blow job shouldn't be a problem as long as you don't grip me by the hair or shoulders. You can even fuck my face. It'll be fine, okay?"
No, it wasn't fine at all, but Sheppard seemed determined to pretend that it was, and Evan had to follow suit, like it or not. At least Sheppard had told him what to avoid doing. "You're the boss, sir. Anything I should avoid saying to you?" Evan asked tightly, wanting to avoid as many landmines inherent in this situation as possible.
Sheppard's face shuttered and he said quietly, "Don't call me Pet or slut."
"Got it," Evan replied. "No calling you Pet or slut. No gripping your hair. No gripping your shoulders. Anything else I should avoid?"
"Not for a blowjob," Sheppard replied.
Evan's stomach did a slow queasy roll at the implication of more triggers that Sheppard wasn't prepared to talk about if he didn't have to. "Okay." He released Sheppard's wrists. "Whenever you feel ready, then."
"Let's just get it over with now," Sheppard replied, shifting from his knees to his feet and standing up.
Evan stood up with him and looked over at the elders. The old lady gave him a quizzical look and he said, "We're ready. Can we do this over by a wall or something?"
All the elders nodded and the old lady waved her cane at a nearby building.
That left only one more thing to take care of before Evan started this charade. He clicked on his radio and murmured, "Every last one of you had better look somewhere else until this is finished or I will put all you on every shit detail I can come up with until the end of time, got it? And don't think that I won't know if there was any peeking, because I will." All the marines with him were tops and Evan absolutely was not going to risk decreasing his commanding officer's standing in front of them. Suitably warned, the marines obediently became immediately fascinated with something that was in any direction but the building the old lady had pointed at. He clicked off and then reluctantly dredged up his toppiest tone and said to Sheppard, "Over by the wall, sub."
Sheppard nodded tightly, not looking him, and went over to stand by the wall, his eyes looking down at the ground in front of him.
Evan glanced over at Sheppard's team. Sergeant Banks had her eyes firmly on Ronon. Ronon stared at the at the ground. McKay's eyes darted uncomfortably between Sheppard and Lorne as his hands fidgeted with a piece of equipment. Teyla returned his gaze calmly. Evan nodded at her and then went over to Sheppard.
He stood in front of him for a moment or two, then ordered, "On your knees, sub."
Sheppard slid with perfect grace to his knees and Evan wished that the circumstances were better so that he could actually enjoy this. He stepped forward so that his crotch was directly in Sheppard's face. "Get my dick out and put it in your mouth."
Sheppard reached up and undid his pants, pulled his flaccid cock out and wrapped his mouth around it. Evan grabbed one of his hands as it let go of Evan's cock and Sheppard looked up at him, his eyes questioning. Evan cupped the hand he held under his balls. "Any time you need to stop, squeeze," he murmured.
Sheppard nodded slowly and Evan felt the hand wrap gently around his nuts. "Suck it," Evan ordered.
The feel of Sheppard's tongue teasing the slit of his cock hit him briefly and then Sheppard's cheeks hollowed as he sucked hard on Evan's dick. Sheppard had a competent enough blow-job technique, but Sheppard's tense and closed off body language bothered him immensely and his cock was slow to fill and harden as a result. There was no power exchange flowing between them at all, and it was quite likely that this would end up being the worst sex Evan had ever experienced in his life. Desperate to form any kind of connection at all with the sub sucking his cock, Evan slowly reached down with a curled hand and stroked the back of his forefinger gently across Sheppard's cheek. Sheppard's eyes flicked up to look at him, startled, and Evan was moved to say, "You're such a brave boy."
John continued to stare up at him, his gaze suddenly almost hungry as he continued to suck Evan's cock. Evan's breath caught as the atmosphere surrounding them suddenly electrified. He stroked John's cheek again as his cock suddenly surged with interest and continued, "Yes, a very brave boy. You protect and serve everyone so well. You make me so proud of you. I am so proud and I would never harm you. You can let go, John. You are a treasure and I use all that I value with respect. Let go, John. Let go and let me use you, take you down good."
Evan watched as John blinked fiercely and felt as he swallowed hard around Evan's cock in reaction to Evan's words. Evan hated this Nancy person all over again. It was as if no one had ever told John he had any value to them as a sub. "Come on, my brave boy. Lean back against the wall and give it up to me. You don't have to protect yourself here. I have you. I have you and you're safe with me," he crooned, stroking the backs of his fingers against John's stubbly cheek.
He was surprised as the wary reserve that had always surrounded John suddenly broke, and he went pliant and loose, his hand falling away from Evan's balls. Quickly recovering, Evan stepped closer, pushing John back with a knee so he rested against the wall. "Good boy," he praised, and braced his hands against the wall above John's head. "Such a good brave boy. So brave."
He felt John's mouth slacken and saw John gaze back up at him, his face peaceful, his eyes trusting. The energy flowed fluidly between them and Evan thrilled that, despite everything about this clusterfuck, he'd somehow managed to put the man into sub-space. "What a wonderful brave boy," he breathed and then flexed his hips, slowly pumping his cock in John's open, submissive mouth.
Evan kept up a constant stream of praise for the man submitting to him as he fucked John's face in a steady, even pace. How sweet his mouth was, how brave, how good, and how delightful his submission was. As John fell further and further into sub-space, Evan felt as his throat relaxed more, and he pumped his cock in deeper and deeper until his balls were hitting John in the chin with every thrust. "So hot, such a good boy, yes," Evan said a little desperately, close, so close to coming now. "Take it, take it all, you're so good, oh yeah, gonna come down your throat and you're gonna swallow it all, such a good boy."
John's eyes fluttered closed at that and he leaned his head back a little more, the very picture of sweet submission. Evan groaned at the sight, shoved his cock eagerly into John's mouth as far as it would go and came, shuddering as he felt John swallowing around his throbbing cock, his throat muscles working to milk every last lingering drop.
Evan pulled back to allow John to breathe and let the sub continue to suck his softening cock until he'd recovered somewhat. He then pulled out and was gratified to see that John tried to follow it with his mouth. He cupped his hands around John's face, bent down and kissed him very gently on the forehead. "You did so well; it felt so good to use you like that."
John smiled in a vague dreamy sort of way and Evan smiled back. He dearly wanted to reward the sub with an orgasm, but they'd only discussed the blowjob and John was too far into sub-space to do any other scene negotiations. There was no way Evan was going to go any further without making sure what he did would not trigger a flashback. Evan kissed John on the forehead again instead. "You are a very good, very brave boy."
John's eyes closed and Evan stuffed his dick back into his pants and straightened back up. Evan turned and looked at the elders. "I can take him home now, right?" John was in far too vulnerable a headspace for Evan to feel comfortable with letting him stay here, even with a full troop of marines and Evan to back him up.
The wizened old man with the bad attitude crossed his arms and said grumpily, "Yes, you may go."
Evan turned back to John and put a hand out to him. "Come on, up you go."
It was obvious that John was still deep in sub-space as he caught Evan's hand and allowed himself to be helped up. It was strange to see John that exposed and unprotected and Evan felt the irrational desire to cover him up and hide him away from everyone until he was his usual self again. Chiding himself for being an overly toppy idiot, Evan still wrapped an arm around John's waist and pulled him close. "Teyla, I'm leaving the troops here with you," he said over his shoulder, and guided John back to where the jumper was parked.
The trip home was quiet, Evan piloting and keeping one eye on John as he slowly came up out of sub-space. By the time they'd landed, Sheppard was mostly back out of sub-space and went to the infirmary calmly enough. Encouraged by that, Evan dared to hope that the rest of the day would be as normal as it got in Atlantis. He got up onto an exam table on the other side of the infirmary to get his own post-mission physical.
A sudden crash on the other side of the privacy curtain swiftly disabused Evan of that notion. He leaped off the table and shoved aside the curtain to see John backed into a corner, panting and glassy-eyed as one of the nurses, a top, advanced on him slowly, her hand outstretched toward the colonel's shoulder.
"Freeze!" Evan shouted, terrified that she'd grab the Colonel by the shoulder and make things even worse than they already were. The nurse came to halt and looked over her shoulder at him. He strode quickly up to them and pushed her firmly away from John. "Let me handle this, okay?"
Dr. Keller came running into the room and asked, "What's going on?"
The nurse turned to her and said, "I just started to check the Colonel's eyes when he freaked out on me!"
Evan suddenly recalled that this particular nurse always put a hand on top of his head to tilt his head up when she checked his eyes and he knew what had happened. "Doc, can you clear everyone out? I'm pretty sure I can calm the Colonel down, but it'll be easier without an audience."
She eyed John warily for a moment and then replied, "Okay, Major. But if I hear any sounds of a struggle, I'm calling security, understand?"
"Yes, ma'am," Evan replied, and stationed himself in front of John. After the room was completely clear and the door closed, he turned around and looked at John. He was shaking slightly, staring off into space.
"John?" Evan said softly. "John, you're safe." He slowly reached out and stroked John's arm with the palm of his hand. "You're having another flashback. It isn't real."
John jerked away from his touch, flinching as if he'd been struck in the face and his panting grew harsher as he crashed down hard onto his knees and then curled up in on himself. He began whimpering.
"Fuck," Evan whispered as he knelt next to him. "John! John, it's not real! You're okay; you're with me, Evan!" He laid a hand on John's back and the man flinched again, moaning. Evan sat on the floor and pulled him into his lap, holding him loosely. "You're safe, John, you're safe. Nancy isn't here. I promise you're safe. Nobody is going to hurt you here. I won't let them."
John trembled within the circle of his arms as Evan continued to murmur reassurances into his ear. It broke Evan's heart to see a sub reduced to this state due to abuse, and he vowed to find the top who did this to John the next time he was Earthside and beat the living snot out of her.
Eventually the flashback seemed to release John from its grip and he ceased shivering in Evan's arms. As John stiffened up and made to pull away, Evan gripped him more firmly and said, "Don't. You don't have to fake being okay just yet."
"Major," John began, his voice raspy and thin.
Evan interrupted, "Evan. Right now, I'm Evan, you're John, and you've had a lousy ass day and could use a little comforting, not to mention a patient advocate."
John sighed, the tension in his body releasing just slightly. "Evan..."
"I know I'm not your top, John, but I am a top that you just submitted to, and I'm very serious about taking care of anyone I play with," Evan explained as he rubbed John's back with one hand. "You were triggered into having two flashbacks today. In between those, you were forced to publicly submit in order to not jeopardize an future trade agreement that we need. By anybody's standard, you've had it rough today. As a responsible top, I can't not take care of you and you most definitely need care right now. So give yourself a break already and just stay here for a while until you're less freaked out. I'm not on your team, but I promise you that you're just as safe with me as you are with them."
John sighed again, and, to Evan's relief, sagged into his embrace. "As long as we're clear you're not my top," he muttered.
"I'd forewarn you about that by asking you out on a date first," Evan replied lightly. "My mom taught me that that was the polite thing to do if I ever wanted to become somebody's top."
John huffed a small chuckle into Evan's chest and shifted to a more comfortable position. For several minutes, they just sat there, Evan stroking John's back and listening to him breathe. John then said, "Evan?"
"Yeah?"
John began haltingly, "I just wanna... I mean, I really..." He heard John swallow hard and then continue, "You...you're a good top. Today...today with you wasn't bad."
Usually that kind of comment was damning with faint praise, but considering that all signs pointed to John having had truly horrific experiences with at least one top prior, this time Evan took it as a compliment. "I'm glad to hear that."
John shifted in his arms. "I kinda wished you'd have let me come, though."
Evan tightened his embrace around John briefly. "I wanted to, but we'd only negotiated the blowjob. I didn't know what I could do to get you off that would also be safe for you. I wasn't willing to risk it."
John sighed. "Yeah, I get that. I can handle the blue balls."
Evan grinned at him. "Now you're making me feel bad about it. Is this your way of asking me to bring you off?"
The offhanded refusal that Evan expected didn't come. Instead a heavy silence sprang up between them and he felt John stiffen again in his arms.
Evan licked his lips and then said carefully, "I'm sorry. That question was out of line."
John surged out of his loose grasp and turned to look at him, his face upset. "God damn it, I'm not fragile. Yes, I was asking!" John stood up and paced a couple of rounds restlessly. Then he stopped and glared down at Evan. "Do you know how long it's been since I successfully submitted to somebody? Since somebody didn't automatically assume that my dynamic was 'bad boy, take him down hard'? Since I haven't been called frigid? Do you?" He looked away from Evan and ran a hand through his hair, his face screwed up with frustration and anger. "Years. It's been fucking years, Evan. Jesus Christ, all you would have had to do was order me to come in my pants and I would have been there."
The door opened and Evan scrambled up as Dr. Keller poked her head in. "I heard yelling. Is everything okay in here?"
John went over and threw himself onto the examination table that he'd abandoned during his flashback. "Everything is peachy, doc. Finish me up so I can get out of here. I've got things to do."
She and the rest of the medical team came back in, Dr. Keller wary as she came up to John. "I'll take over doing your exam, if that's okay with you, Colonel?"
Evan eased over so that he was beside the table John sat on. "Ma'am, if you don't mind, I think it would be best if..."
"No need, Major," Sheppard bit out, not looking at him. "I can handle this now. Go ahead, Doc."
Evan took in the tight look on his face, the knotted muscles in his jaw and mentally kicked himself for hurting the guy so bad by saying one stupid sentence. "Right, sir. If you need me, I'll be right over there," he said, jerking his thumb toward the other side of the infirmary before turning smartly on his heel and heading over there. He jumped back up onto his own examination table, and as the nurse closed the privacy curtain around him again, scrubbed his face with both hands tiredly. The entire god-damned day was a clusterfuck and he couldn't wait for it to end.