Work Text:
You lean against the top rope at the far side of the ring, just soaking in the empty arena and the bustling activity of the crew setting up. Thousands and thousands of empty seats stare back at you just waiting to be filled. A few more hours and they will be. There was a time when the thought of performing in front of such a crowd would have excited you, not so much these days.
Over the past couple of years you’ve been with the WWE you’ve grown more and more dissatisfied. You’ve been creatively stifled, constantly over looked and despite being as much of a draw as some of the top guys you’re getting a fraction of the pay. It’s not like you’ve just stewed in resentful silence, you’ve tried to change how to company treats you. You’ve gone to creative with ideas and they haven’t been interested. You’ve talked to all the right people about your money only to be brushed off. You’re fed up of it.
So here you are in the ring before the show to say your own private goodbye because as far as your concerned tonight is your last match. The only thing you haven’t decided is whether tonight’s match will be your last ever. You started wrestling young and you’ve had a long, solid career so honestly you could walk away right now with few regrets. The only question really is do you want to ?
“Well I was wonderin’ where you’d gone off to”
You turn to see AJ frowning at you. He’s wearing his dad jeans which on normal day would at the very least draw a smirk from you. Right now though you feel too melancholy, too introspective to make your regular jokes at his expense. That’s likely the reason his frown deepens. He ducks under the ropes to stand across from you. “What’s going on ?” AJ crosses his arms over his chest, making the sleeves of his t-shirt strain against his biceps. That’s another thing you usually enjoy, even AJ’s biceps aren’t enough to break you out of your funk.
“Oh I’m just saying goodbye” You pat the ropes fondly like they’re an old friend. Hell, they pretty much are at this point, you’ve been wrestling longer than you’ve known a sizeable portion of your friends.
“Goodbye ? Why in the hell would you be sayin’ goodbye ? We ain’t even done the show yet”
Your fingers dance idly over the ropes as you think about what you’re going to tell AJ right now. “I don’t want to wrestle any more” seems to encapsulate everything into one small package. You’re unsure whether you want to go into all the details right now, with your emotions so close to the surface. You don’t want to blow up on AJ. Who’s standing across from you looking stunned.
“Ever ? Are ya sayin’ I’ll never see you wrestle ever again ?”
You shrug, still undecided on that front. “Maybe. I haven’t come to a solid conclusion on that one”
AJ just doesn’t know what to do or say. You wait patiently while he finds his words because undoubtedly once he does they’ll be plentiful and AJ certainly doesn’t let you down on that front. “But… but we just got here !” AJ splutters. You assume that by ‘we’ AJ means himself and your good brothers Luke and Karl, perhaps Finn down in NXT to a lesser extent. “There’s so much we could do together. Me and the guys have been throwin’ ideas around for a while, we just gotta go talk to Creative”
He’s looking at you beseechingly, like if he puppy-dog eyes you for long enough you’ll stay. Like you haven’t agonised over your decision. Like all you were waiting for was someone to beg you to not leave. “Oh really AJ ? That’s great ! Guess what I’ve already tried that. It’ll be a cold day in hell before they ever let me near you guys story-wise. I’m under paid, under utilised and creatively stifled. I don’t want to be here any more AJ. I want to go back to Japan where I actually looked forward to performing or maybe try Mexico and see what it’s like down there. Fuck it maybe I will actually retire. Right now I think I might prefer walking away entirely than wrestling a second longer for this company”
You’ve left yourself panting with the force of your outburst. Man, you’d really thought that going over all this right now was a bad idea but it seems the resentment has built up so much that the words are just being forced out of you. “I thought wrestling here would be a dream come true and it’s not. All those dreams I had as a kid have been tarnished by reality and it sucks. It really fucking sucks”
AJ absorbs your uncharacteristic outburst and blinks vacantly for a few seconds. You sigh, all of a sudden completely wiped and already full of regret. AJ hadn’t deserved your anger, he wasn’t the person you were mad at. “Sorry, I’m just tired of the bullshit ya know ?” You run a hand through your hair and hold your arms open for a hug.
AJ takes you up on your offer. Tugging you in close and folding you into his body, carefully tucking your head under his chin. “Well God dang it. I didn’t know ya felt like that. I mean me and the guys have been saying that they’ve been booking ya like shit, that’s why we’ve been tryna’ think of storylines you could be in with us”
You stand there in the middle of the ring, in AJ’s embrace and for that one moment you’re content. To you, there is no safer place than the circle of AJ’s arms. His chest the only solid thing in the universe that could support you, the vibration of his voice leaving his throat soothing in a way nothing else could ever be.
“I know you’re unhappy Darlin’ but d'ya have to leave ? Isn’t there somethin’, anythin’ we could do ?”
You don’t think there is. You’ve done everything you possibly could to make your time in the company better but no one’s cared. Maybe AJ could improve things for you but the question is do you really want to be in a company that values the voice of others over you’re own ? It’s not like you’re some green kid. You’ve dedicated you’re life to this business and you’ve paid your dues several times over. So you shake your head no, your nose brushing the skin of AJ’s throat.
“Ah man. I just… I just don’t want you to leave me Darlin’. What am I gonna do without ya huh ? What the heck am I goin’ to do without ya ?”
You chuckle a little to yourself. “You’ve got plenty of people here AJ. Your brothers are here. I’m sure in no time you’ll find some else to have lunch with. There’ll probably be people knocking down your door just for the chance to ride with you. You’ll be fine”
You pat his back and try to pull away but he holds you tighter. “Ah ya don’t get it. How could ya I suppose. No one could ever replace ya. You are the bright spot in my day. No matter if I’m havin’ the crappiest day I’ve ever had in my life or the best that there ever could be, it’s you that’s the highlight. I could win a hundred belts or main event a thousand pay-per-views but havin’ lunch with you or talking to you, just for a second, as we pass each in the hall is always going to mean more to me because it’s you. Dammit I love ya’. I always have and maybe it’s selfish of me ta tell ya’ right now but I’d regret it if I let you walk away without saying anything”
You’re dreaming. You must be. Things like this don’t happen in real life. The friend you’ve always had feelings for doesn’t just drop a damn promo on you telling you how much he loves you, how much he’s apparently always loved you. “I want you to stay. Selfishly, completely selfishly o’ course but I love ya and I’ll support ya in whatever you want to do. Even if it’s retire or move to Mexico and even if it’s slapping me right in the face because I’ve just dropped all this on ya”
You don’t know what to say or do or think or feel. God if this really is dream you don’t ever want to wake up. How have you gone from debating the end of your career to finding out that AJ is in love with you ? How has one day been such a roller-coaster ride of emotion ? You curl your fingers into the fabric of his shirt overwhelmed.
“Wow. I don’t… I mean I don’t even know what to say AJ”
You feel the lightest of kisses land on the top of your head. “Say you love me too and if you don’t then tell me you at least won’t forget me when you leave” This man. This ridiculous man. Like you could ever in a million lifetimes forget him.
“Of course I love you. I dare anyone in the world to meet you and not fall in love with you. Just… how am I supposed to leave you now ? How do I walk away from this place now without feeling like I’m walking away from you ”
There are tears gathering on your eyelashes and dammit you don’t want to cry. AJ pulls back but only far enough so he can look into your eyes, his hands come up to cup your face. “Ah sweetheart now that one’s easy. You can walk away from here and run as far away as ya want but as long I know you love me I’ll never think you’re walking away from me. If we want to we’ll make it work. Now, I really want to kiss ya but I kinda just remembered we’ve been standing in the middle of the ring for past ten minutes”
You look around surreptitiously and sure enough you’ve drawn a small measure of attention. Some of the lighting people have paused in their work to see the spectacle in the ring and more than one of pyro guys has stopped what they’re doing to see what’s going on. You don’t care though. You’ve got one foot out the door and a beautiful man in front of you. What in the hell do you have to loose ?
“AJ I know I’ve waited long enough, haven’t you ?” He tosses his head back and laughs. “D'ya know what ? I think you’re right” The kiss is everything you dreamed it would be. Passionate, full of the scratch of AJ’s beard and finally, finally happening.