Chapter Text
Papyrus leaned back in his chair at the kitchen table, lightly dozing while his brother stood at the stove—using a stepping stool to make up for his diminutive height. The smell of cumin and cooking meat mixed in the air pleasantly, and the sizzle of the pan was a familiar, relaxing sound. He couldn’t resist the pull of the feelings of warmth and safety, and soon found himself dozing lightly. Distantly, he was aware of Sans’ happy chatter, and he managed to offer little grunts of agreement at the appropriate times to avoid his bro’s accusations of laziness.
Neither of them was prepared for the front door to suddenly bang open. Sure, they rarely locked it, but that didn’t imply an open invitation. What really shattered the peace, however, was the sudden, panicked, “PAPS!” that rent the air.
Paps’ chair tilted too far back, dumping him on the floor. Sans yelped and accidentally knocked a pan with his elbow, sending both red-hot pan and its contents to the floor. The smaller skeleton yelped, but turned to the doorway, no doubt worried about their “visitor”. Paps could not allow his younger, smaller brother to face whatever had come to disturbed their lunch break, so he scrambled to his feet to join his brother in the doorway. His jaw popped open at the sight before him.
Another Sans stood on their porch. That was not so surprising—they’d met him before, when their universes had accidentally crossed, and with some tinkering to the machine downstairs, they’d found a way to keep in touch and to contact other universes as well. Seeing this tough-talking version of Sans completely panicked and covered in marrow was worrying enough. Finding him there, apparently uninjured, and dragging his asshole of a brother—who looked completely wrecked—was a good deal more concerning. And surprising. They’d only met Papyrus’s double a few times, but they’d met often enough for Paps to be absolutely certain that he hated the other skeleton.
Sans—or ‘Red’, as they’d taken to calling him to avoid confusion—on the other hand, had essentially been adopted by both Blue and Paps. He was completely panicked, his breathing erratic and his magic flaring and pulsing sporadically. His magic eye guttered and crackled. Looking at him made Paps’ soul hurt.
Blue rushed forward. “sa—blue!” Paps caught him by his neckerchief and forced the smaller skeleton to approach more cautiously. He did not trust the other Papyrus, or ‘Edge’ as they’d taken to calling him.
“please,” Red whimpered, tears gathering in his sockets, “i…i didn’t know where to bring him.”
Paps looked down at the injured skeleton and resisted the urge to suggest they drop him off at the dump, where trash belonged. Or off a cliff. “What happened?” Blue asked, worried. Silently, Paps cursed; his bro was too good for his own good.
“he finally pick on someone big enough to give him a bad time, huh?” Paps asked, unconcerned.
“Papyrus!” Blue scolded, “We have to help!”
“why?”
Blue started to reply, but Red beat him to it. “please, paps….” His voice cracked when he spoke. “…he’s my brother. i can’t l-lose—“ And them he started sobbing, threatening to dump the bigger skeleton on the ground he was shaking so hard.
Opening the door wider, Paps stepped out of the way, a silent invitation. “geeze, kiddo. way to play dirty. just take him to the spare room.”
Red didn’t waste any time. Blue took Edge’s other arm, and the two Sanses awkwardly maneuvered the much larger monster through the living room and onto the guest bed. Paps raised a browbone when he saw that marrow and congealed magic had pooled in their doorway. It stained the snow leading up the walk, too. Despite himself, a flicker of concern caused his soul to flare, but he crushed it ruthlessly. fuckfell deserves it. He forcibly reminded himself, thinking of the casual way the other monster would kick his brother around. If that’s how he treated the smaller monster in front of witnesses, he could only imagine what when on behind closed doors. Not that Red would tell him anything.
Casually, he followed the others into the guest room and leaned against the wall. Blue ran past to gather bandages and disinfectant while Red worked on the leather straps of his brother’s armor. Paps leaned closer, noting that the armor was caved in on one side. Fuckfell’s face was bruised and scratched as well, and a few cosmetic scratches lined his arms. It was obvious that his ribs had taken most of the damage, though.
Blue burst into the room to help Red muscle the bulky armor off. “what happened?” Paps asked.
“…undyne…” Red said, wrenching the breastplate off.
All of them froze. Paps’s mouth fell open, and Red let out a high-pitched keen. “oh,” said Blue, far too quietly for the normally vocal monster, “stars.”
The right half of Edge’s ribcage was completely shattered. They didn’t even look like bones anymore; rather, bone-pulp floated amorphously in a matrix of red magic. That magic was the only thing holding him together, at the moment. Marrow seeped steadily from the breaks, and spent magic wept from the matrix, like condensation on a cool glass. His unbroken ribs were heavily bruised, the bones flushed with healing magic. Paps swallowed, feeling sick. “holy shit,” he heard himself say. Blue didn’t even chastise him for it.
Red was hyperventilating, but he was the first to recover enough to start working on his brother again. Paps was a little impressed that Blue was able to pull himself back together enough to help him. Well, Paps had no intention of touching his ass of a copy, so he strolled out of the room, pretending not to notice the way his hands shook. For a moment, he stood in the living room, phalanges flicking his lighter. He wanted a cigarette. Instead, he poked his head into the kitchen and eyed the remains of their lunch, burnt and spilt on the floor. Too much work to clean it up. Too much work to start a new batch of tacos. Blue wouldn’t like it, but Muffet’s seemed like the best solution.
So, by the time both Sanses emerged, Paps had lunch waiting for them—and he’d had enough nicotine that he felt able to deal with the mess the multiverse had decided to drop on his doorstep. Blue sighed and put his hands on his hips, but for once, he was too worn out to scold. Instead, he sat and thanked Paps for getting lunch. Red just sat there, looking shell-shocked. “hey, kid,” Paps said as he pushed a bottle of mustard over. Red nodded his thanks, but just rolled the bottle between his hands instead of drinking. Whoa. “that bad, huh?”
Blue actually glared at his brother before turning to his duplicate. “Red,” he said gently, “you can go rest in my room. Since, uh, Edge is taking up most of the spare bed. We can share; it’ll be like a sleepover!” He tried to inject his usual enthusiasm into the last sentence, but his permanent smile seemed weak and his voice was shaky.
“thanks,” Red said, voice even gruffer than usual. He stood, but Paps laid a hand on his shoulder and gently pushed him back down.
“you need to eat, kiddo.”
“okay, boss.” The response was automatic, so Paps tried not to take offense, but Red realized his mistake and immediately started sobbing, skull in his hands. Paps and Blue shared a look.
“I’m calling Alphys,” Blue said, “I’ll let her know we can’t go back to work.”
After dinner, when both Blue and Red were safely tucked away, Paps went to look in on their patient. He had to admit that the duo had done a good job. Red magic shone through the bandages, emanating heat as Edge’s native magic worked to knit the bone fragments back together. Marrow and magic no longer dripped from his ribcage, and the bandages were secure, but not tight.
He surveyed his copy, curious despite himself. He’d never seen the other without his armor, and he had to confess that it was somewhat disconcerting. He’d always assumed that Edge would be smaller without it, but the scarred skeleton’s shoulders were broad, his undamaged bones robust. geeze, who knew the edgelord was so ripped?
Or so scarred up. A latticework of scars crossed his unbroken ribs and vertebrae. Chips were missing from more than a few bones, as well. Sure, he knew that the Fell universes were rough, but Red didn’t look this bad. “hmm, whatever,” he muttered, and shrugged it off. He turned to leave, only to be surprised by a sudden flare of red magic.
It splashed against the wall beside his head, unformed and harmless. He turned and dodged before the red bone, which was certainly not harmless, could hit him. He took a shortcut to the other side of the door, vaguely intending to barricade the other monster inside. He was not prepared for the door to burst open, the frame cracking as Edge kicked it open. “i hope you know you’re paying for that,” he said coolly.
Edge leaned on the doorframe, eyes blazing. “Where is Sans!” he snarled, voice a menacing growl.
Unconcerned, Paps raised a browbone, hands tucked into his pockets. “i think you should probably be more worried about yourself, pal.”
Sure enough, the injured monster was shaking with the effort to remain upright. He flung more magic at Paps, but it was, again, unformed. He didn’t even bother to dodge, just allowed the magic to harmlessly spatter across his chest before it faded to red smoke. He gave his duplicate a sardonic grin. “tell you what; why don’t you stop embarrassing yourself and go back to bed, and i’ll tell him you’re awake. how’s that sound?”
“Tell me now,” Edge snapped, “or I’ll—“
“you’ll what, fuckfell? bleed on me?”
“Papy!” Blue exclaimed from the top of the stairs. Looks like Edge’s temper tantrum had woken him. “Language! That’s no way to treat a guest!”
“and that’s no way to treat a perfectly good door,” he said, pointing to the damaged frame.
Meanwhile, Red was already tripping over himself to get down the stairs. “boss!” As soon as he was in reach, Edge grabbed Red and threw him into the spare room, slamming the door shut behind him. It bounced in the frame.
Paps frowned, marching forward. “blue, go to bed.”
“But—“
“bed, blue. i’ll keep an eye on our guests.” Blue hesitated, so Paps smiled for him. “come on, bro; the magnificent sans needs his rest if he’s going to host these two tomorrow. we got to be at the top of our game. you know how edge gets.”
Blue drew himself up proudly. “The Magnificent Sans is up for ANY challenge! But you’re right, brother; even the most magnificent of monsters, such as myself, requires plenty of rest.” He started to walk back to his room, then paused. “You’ll wake me if anything happens, right, Papy?”
“of course, bro. wouldn’t want you turning into a lazybones like me.”
Blue still looked a little uncertain, but he went back to bed. Paps turned to the door, and immediately pressed the side of his head against it. He could hear heavy breathing, and Red saying, “—to underswap. that dino-bitch coulda tracked us with ‘er cameras if i’da brought ya ta one uh my hidey-holes.”
“Are you injured?”
“nah, boss. i’m fine; fish-face couldn’t touch me if she tried.”
“Good. Your training wasn’t a complete waste, then. My efforts to keep you from falling asleep on the job obviously are, though.”
There was a long silence. Then, so softly Paps almost missed it, Red said, “sorry, boss.”
Edge scoffed. “You know the consequences for your lack of vigilance.” Then he hissed and groaned.
“boss!?”
“Don’t touch me!” Edge snarled, “I’m fine.” Behind the thin door, Paps could hear shuffling.
“okay, that is so obviously a lie, i don’t even know where to start,” said Red. Another groan from Edge, followed by pained breathing and the creak of bed springs. “hey, uh, boss?”
“What?” How, exactly, did a half-dead skeleton manage to sound like such an asshole? It must be a gift.
“not that i’d, ya know, presume ta order ya around er nuthin’, but can you…maybe not go bustin’ through doors and flingin’ magic around? i don’t know, crazy idea, but you might back back on yer feet faster if ya rest a bit. and, another crazy idea, but maybe don’t antagonize paps? dude was ready to let ya dust on the doorstep.”
“Why’d he let us in, then?” geeze, fuckfell, can you at least sound surprised? Sure, he’d never made it a secret that he disliked—hated—the other monster, but he liked to think that he didn’t seem like the ‘callously watch another monster turn to dust before his eyes’ type.
“…i may have turned on the waterworks…. oh, c’mon, boss. don’t look at me like that. they’re nice. blue wanted to help soon as he saw us, an’ paps can’t say no ta blue. besides, this is underswap. it’s all sunshine ‘n rainbows here.” Sunshine and rainbows? That phrase lacked the expected sarcasm. There was something off in the way he emphasized it.
Edge didn’t say anything for a bit, apparently rolling that information around in his head. “No one’s made any unreasonable demands?”
“oh, yeah,” Red said. Ah, there was the sarcasm. “blue’s a vicious little fucker when he wants ta be. made me do the dishes after dinner ‘n everything. then they tied me down ‘n forced me ta listen while paps read some poofy-bunny story er some shit.” The clack of bone on bone sounded. “fuckin’ hell, boss; what was that for?”
“For being an idiot. This is serious.”
“boss, look, jus’ relax, okay? this ain’t underfell. they don’t even lock their doors here, fer fucks’ sake!”
“Is that supposed to make me feel better? Because it doesn’t.”
“c’mon, boss. i told ya—sunshine ‘n rainbows. they won’t hurt us. them or anyone else in this universe. why’d ya think i brought ya here? even the creampuff’s universe ain’t as sweet.”
There was a long pause again. Finally, Edge conceded the point. “I suppose Swapshit wouldn’t leave his Sans unprotected. Go back to bed.”
“language, boss,” chastised Red, doing a passable imitation of Blue. Another clack of bone. “ow!”
“If the situation changes, you’ll tell me immediately,” Edge ordered.
“you got it, boss. g’night.”
Paps ducked into the kitchen, hiding from Red. He waited until he heard Blue’s door open and shut before he exhaled and leaned against the wall. His hands closed into fists as he considered what he’d just heard. As with every interaction he’d ever had with Edge, this one left him with a foul taste in his mouth. Bitterly, he grabbed a bottle of honey and drank straight from the bottle. It hit his magic with a flare, causing warmth to spread outward from his soul.
He had no idea why Red kept going back to that abusive asshat. Edge didn’t even bother trying to hide it. He didn’t act like Red’s brother—he treated the small skeleton like an underling. No wonder Red called him boss rather than bro. Paps’ hands tightened around the honey bottle.
should have left him to dust, he thought angrily, taking another drink. He could see Edge’s sins crawling on his back. A monster didn’t make it to that LV without dusting more than a few monsters. That went past self defense, and edged into ‘doing it for shits and giggles’ territory. If his duplicate ever found himself in Underswap’s judgment hall…. Well, he was going to have a hell of a bad time.
Paps considered going to bed, but he knew that wasn’t going to happen. It was fine when he’d assumed Edge was too injured to do anything, but after that little display…. He made a beeline for the spare room.
To his surprise, Edge appeared to be waiting for him. He was sitting on the edge of the bed, eyelights focused on the door. “I was wondering when you planned on showing up,” Edge grumbled.
Paps pulled the door shut, wishing he had some way of securing it. “i just wanted to go over the house rules,” he said, feigning warmth. Edge’s gaze flicked from him to the doorknob, and his hand curled into a fist. “hurt blue,” Paps warned, still smiling sweetly, “and you’re dust. hurt red, and you’re dust. annoy me, and you’re dust. got it?”
“The last one might give me some trouble.”
“right,” Paps replied, “you are pretty unbearable. i’ll grant some leniency on that rule, but i’m pretty firm on the other two.”
He expected an argument—especially about his second “rule”. Instead, Edge just nodded. “Fine. Now what’s your price?”
Paps blinked. “uh…what?”
“Your. Price,” Edge replied, enunciating each word as if he was talking to an idiot, “What do you want? Has Red promised you anything? Or were you waiting to deal directly with me?”
…this conversation was not proceeding as anticipated. “did you hit your head too, fuckfell? what are you even talking about?”
Edge rubbed at his nasal ridge. “You,” he said, pointing at him, “are providing sanctuary for myself and my brother while I recover. Don’t tell me you expect me to believe you’re doing so out of the kindness of your heart.” He scoffed. “You may have my brother fooled, but I know better. I am a danger to you and yours; you wouldn’t accept that risk without a reward to match.”
“…was that a threat?” Paps asked, orange eyelight flaring despite his lingering confusion. What was Edge on?
“No, numbskull; that was an observation. Rest assured, if I ever threaten you, you will know. Now, again—what’s your price?”
Okay, he was getting tried of dealing with this asshole. “how ‘bout you go fuck yourself, edge,” he said flatly. He couldn’t even inject any venom into his voice, he was so done with this.
Then, oddly, Edge’s breath hitched and his eyelights went out. “I…see,” he said, so softly Paps could barely hear his capitalization. “I have to say I wasn’t expecting that from you.”
Paps cocked his head slightly to the side, arms crossed. “you got sensitive ears all of the sudden, fuckfell?” Geeze, maybe he did hit his skull. If it were someone else, Paps would probably be concerned, but right now, he was just annoyed. “what can i say? guess you bring out the worst in me.”
Edge shifted, his bones clicking. “Fair enough,” he said softly.
This, Paps decided, was getting too weird. Edge couldn’t be that affected by a little profanity—he’d heard him say much worse, usually to Red. Or were his injuries getting to him? He sounded…contrite? No, that wasn’t right. Resigned. He sounded resigned. Oddly, that made Paps’ anger flare. “i’m not going to coddle you just because you’re injured, asshole. drop the act; it doesn’t suit you.”
The other skeleton went completely still. “You want—? Now!?”
Stars’ sakes; were they even having the same conversation? “yeah,” Paps said, just glaring passively down at the injured skeleton, “sure. now.” If the other didn’t want to make any sense, then Paps wasn’t going to try anymore.
“Fine,” Edge said, eyelights dim. Under his breath, he added, “I knew you weren’t as nice as you played at.” Then, to Paps’ shock, Edge slid off the bed and onto his knees.
What. The. Actual. Fuck.
He gaped at his doppelganger, while Edge just gazed up at him. “Well?” the black-clad skeleton snapped, “I don’t have the magic for anything else. Just, manifest something so I can get you off and be done with it.”
This. This was insane. Paps took a step forward, feeling oddly lightheaded. He looked—really looked—at the other monster.
The Great and Terrible Papyrus
LV 13
HP 70/1360
AT 40
DF 40
*This won’t kill him. He’s had worse.
His posture wasn’t at all what Paps had come to expect, either. He was hunched in on himself, chin and shoulders tucked almost protectively. He looked defeated. Broken. He’d seen the look often enough in the mirror that he really should have recognized it in another version of himself. There was more there, though. Fury under the fear, and a seed of determination that Paps lacked—determination, he realized, that would allow this version of himself to do terrible things in the name of survival.
Moving slowly, Paps reached out and touched Edge’s shoulder on his uninjured side. The contact was feather-light, but Edge hissed and glared up at him, as if he’d been burned. Paps looked over the other monster, searching his features. Stars this was disturbing. If he whipped it out, the other monster would really—
Paps felt ill. Edge was vulnerable right now, and well aware of it. Furthermore, he fully expected Paps to take advantage of that fact. Swallowing thickly, Paps tightened his grip on Edge’s shoulder. He need an anchor, something from this moment, this timeline. Something to focus on. “edge,” he said, voice shaky, “why don’t you go on and, um, get back up on the bed. we’ve, uh, had a bit of a misunderstanding. when i told you to go fuck yourself, i didn’t mean it literally.”
Edge looked up at him, fury written in every line of his features. “Then what’s your price?” he snapped, backing away from Paps. The way he moved, it was obvious he was going to need help getting back on the bed, so Paps ducked down to hoist him up, despite Edge’s protests.
“stop squawking,” Paps snapped, “i’m trying to help!” Stars, this guy was unbearable!
“I don’t need your stars-damned help,” Edge snarled, scrambling away from him now that he was back on the bed, “Get your filthy hands off of me, and tell me your fucking price!”
Paps was too disturbed to make a ‘fucking’ pun right now, so he let it pass. Besides, it seemed in poor taste at the moment. “there’s no price, edge,” he said, backing away. “we’re just—“
“There’s always a price to ‘kindness’,” Edge hissed. “Tell me what it is now.”
A mix of exhaustion and annoyance caused him to make a decision he would probably regret later, but he didn’t have the patience to deal with this version of himself. If it was Red, he would have moved mountains to make him more comfortable, to make sure he knew he was safe, but Edge wasn’t worth the effort. Edge was an asshole. Edge had more LV than anyone Paps had ever even met. Edge deserved every bit of suffering he had coming to him. “you don’t really like being touched, do you, edge?”
“…Excuse me?”
“i’m not talking sexual touching,” Paps clarified, “frankly, the idea of your magic mingling with mine makes me ill.”
“Glad we can agree on something,” Edge grumbled. And that was it. Paps was done.
He surged forward, grabbing Edge by the chin and forcing him to meet Paps’ gaze. “i think that’s more than enough out of you. so, as i was saying, you don’t like being touched. i’ve noticed how you pull away every time someone tries to touch you, even if it’s just on the hand or shoulder. you always act like you’re in physical pain when someone manages to touch you, and stars forbid someone like blue or rus manages to hug you.” He chuckled darkly, enjoying how Edge’s eyelights had started to fade as he spoke.
“You watch me a lot more closely than I think I’m comfortable with,” Edge said, trying for snarky but not quite managing it.
“gotta look out for my bro,” Paps said, “he sees a piece of trash like you, and he thinks to himself ‘i can fix it, make it shiny and new again’. he doesn’t realize that garbage can only drag him down into the trash heap too.”
Some emotion crossed Edge’s face that Paps couldn’t quite place. “You don’t have much faith in your brother,” he observed flatly.
“he can’t see what you are—only what he wants you to be. but this isn’t about him. its about you. you want a price, fuckfell? fine. here’s my price; you’re going to put up with whatever touching blue or i want to inflict on you. you aren’t going to struggle, and you sure as hell aren’t going to push us away. blue wants a hug? then you’re going to let him give you a fucking hug.”
“And you’ll allow Red and me to stay here, otherwise unmolested, until I am well enough to go back to Underfell?”
“yep,” he said, popping the ‘p’.
“Deal, then.”
“what? no handshake? don’t you know how to seal a deal, pal?” Edge held out his hand, and allowed Paps to shake it, though the scarred skeleton didn’t put any effort into it. Of course. The terms of their deal were rather specific; Edge had agreed to put up with physical contact, not to initiate or encourage it. “oh, and i wasn’t kidding; you’re paying to repair the door.”
Even without eyes, Edge managed to roll them. “Right. Fine. Whatever. Are you done yet?”
Just for that, Paps brought a hand to Edge’s cervical vertebrae and squeezed. “ya know, you look weird without your scarf.”
“Red knows I don’t like to get marrow on it,” Edge said, eyes averted. His phalanges twitched, hands squeezing into fists before releasing. His breathing was hard and uneven, fighting his instinct to pull away. Paps smirked, enjoying seeing the cruel skeleton so unnerved and vulnerable. This might actually be fun.
“sleep well, edgelord.” He gave the other skeleton’s vertebrae one more slight squeeze, then left.