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Lena looks around at everyone else at the party. They’re talking and laughing, having fun. She knew she should have just stayed in her office and finished up end-of-the-year paperwork, but she was convinced into coming. When Kara invited her to her New Year’s Eve party, she initially declined.
It was only after Maggie came by her office and promised she’d keep the others in line that she finally agreed to attend. She and Maggie have grown closer since the detective arrested her. Lena easily forgave her for doing her job, but that didn’t stop Maggie from apologizing profusely.
The rest of Kara’s friends weren’t so easy to impress. James didn’t trust her, Winn was still weary, J’onn is indifferent, though sometimes he looks at Lena like he knows more than he should. Eliza is much nicer than Lena thought she would be, but she can tell the woman is still being cautious.
Alex is slowly coming around, but Lena is so sick of people having to force themselves into giving her a chance simply because of her last name. Maggie has helped Alex to trust Lena more and while Lena appreciates it, it still hurts that Kara’s sister is so closed off from her.
So, now she stands by herself, nursing a strong glass of scotch from the bottle she brought along with her. Maggie was with her for much of the night, but she had to go and see the other guests eventually.
James and Winn are in the living room, watching the New Year’s Eve celebration on the TV. And Alex and Maggie are speaking with J’onn behind the couch that James and Winn are sitting on. Kara is in the kitchen, helping Eliza set up the champagne in preparation for the ball drop.
Kara. Kara has been the one good thing about Lena’s life in the past year she’s known her. After she sent her mother to prison, she was officially alone.
But Kara refused to leave her side. She made sure Lena knew she was cared for, that she was protected, always. And somewhere along the line, Lena realized her feelings for the blonde.
She shoved them down, refusing to allow her silly emotions to come between her friendship with Kara. It was all she had left and the thought of ruining it over feelings that she doesn’t think will ever be returned is something Lena isn’t willing to do.
Maggie has tried telling her that Kara feels the same way, but Lena knows she’s just trying to make her feel better about the situation. In no world, in no universe, on no planet would sunny Kara Danvers ever love a Luthor.
Lena stands off to the side, leaning her back against the wall. She’s looking over her emails on her phone, only glancing up every so often to watch the TV.
There’s ten minutes until the countdown begins and Lena doesn’t really want to stay for it, but she knows if she leaves now Kara will be devastated. So she stays put.
She’s still scanning her phone when Kara finally emerges from the kitchen.
“Three minutes! Everyone come grab your glass!”
Everyone heads to the kitchen to swipe their champagne, before heading back to the living room. Lena decided against it. She doesn’t really like champagne and with the way the night is going so far, she needs the strong whiskey more than any kind of bubbly drink.
Lena makes her way over to stand off to the side of the crowd of people surrounding the TV. She looks at Kara, who’s staring right back at her, shooting her a smile.
“Okay, okay! Here we go!” Winn shouts.
TEN
Lena laughs at Kara as the woman trips over Winn’s foot as she walks over to her.
NINE
Kara rolls her eyes as she regains her balance, her bright smile still plastered on her face.
EIGHT
Lena reaches out a hand to guide her the rest of the way.
SEVEN
“I may have had a bit too much to drink.” Kara states, face slightly flushed from the alien wine she’d consumed.
SIX
Lena’s eyes gleam as she smiles up at her friend. She feels the alcohol coursing through her veins, fogging up her thoughts.
FIVE
She makes a decision that will alter her friendship with Kara. She knows she may come to regret it, but right now, she’s been given scotch induced courage that she’s not going to ignore.
FOUR
THREE
Lena takes in a shaky breath and turns towards Kara, preparing herself for the potential damage this could do to their friendship.
TWO
Kara smiles, as she watches the ball drop on the TV. She grabs Lena’s hand and glances around at all her friends, before settling on Lena.
ONE
Lena forces herself to meet Kara’s eye, before glancing at her lips. Kara gives her a quizzical look, but keeps a curious smile plastered on her face.
“HAPPY NEW YEAR!!” Everyone shouts. Kara squeezes Lena’s hand. “Happy New Year, Lena.” She says, as everyone else says their individual New Year greetings to each other.
Lena feels her heart rate skyrocket, as she finally brings a hand up to cup Kara’s cheek and leans up on her tip-toes. She brings her lips to Kara’s, softly.
For a second, neither of them make a move. Lena just presses her lips gently, giving Kara the reins, while Kara is frozen in shock.
Kara’s mind finally catches up with her and she abruptly pulls away. She wipes her lips with her shirt and shakes her head, still confused about the kiss.
Lena watches with wide, terrified, eyes as Kara pulls away from her.
“I-Lena…I didn’t, I can’t…” She trails off, the crinkle in her forehead prevalent, showing her distress.
“I’m so sorry. I thought…You know what? I should go.” The brunette stutters out, before turning on her heel and heading for the door.
She grabs her jacket on the way out and makes her way out of the apartment without sparing anyone else a second glance. She has her driver bring her straight to L-Corp, where she should have spent her night in the first place. ‘I hate Maggie.’ She thinks, as the elevator doors open to her office.
The CEO immediately heads for her liquor cabinet and pours herself another glass of scotch, downing it, before pouring another.
--
Kara watches as her best friend all but runs out of her apartment. “Lena, wait…” She calls out, far too softly for Lena to be able to hear.
She puts a hand on her forehead, guilt filling her as she thinks back to how she’d reacted. She hadn’t meant to react that way. She was just surprised. She had never thought Lena returned her feelings, so when she kissed her she didn’t know what to think.
She finally glances around and sees her friends looking at her, wearily. She forces a smile. “Happy New Year, guys.”
The murmur their replies and Kara heads to the kitchen. She feels instantly sober, as what just happened firmly settles itself in her gut. She places her hands against the counter top, using it to support her weight.
“You okay?” Alex asks, softly, placing a supportive hand on her sister’s back. Maggie trails behind her, looking at her with concern in her eyes.
“I’m fine. I just…Lena…I didn’t-I don’t-I shouldn’t have reacted that way.” Alex rubs soothing circles on her back.
“What did you say to her?”
“You didn’t hear?” Alex shakes her head. Kara sighs.
“I just didn’t say anything. I stuttered out something so stupid and she thinks I was rejecting her. I wiped my lips, Alex.” Alex raises her eyebrows, clearly surprised, while Maggie’s eyes widen.
“I have to go to Lena.” Maggie states, not even sparing Kara a glance, as she quickly makes her way out. Maggie knows how strongly Lena feels about Kara and the thought of Lena thinking she was rejected, thinking she isn’t wanted, doesn’t settle right with the detective.
Alex watches her go, sighing audibly at her sister’s inability to handle emotions.
“She’s crying, Alex. I can hear her crying. I didn’t mean to make her cry.” Kara says, her own eyes filling with tears. She tries tuning out of her super hearing, but she needs to make sure Lena is safe.
Alex nods, placing a hand on Kara’s.
“I just don’t understand, Kar. You’ve been in love with her for months.”
Kara takes her hand away from Alex’s to wipe a stray tear as it rolls down her face. She turns around so she’s leaning back against the counter and looks at her friends in the living room, as they argue over what they should watch.
“I don’t-“ She takes in a shaky breath. “I wasn’t expecting it. I didn’t think she felt the same and I’d accepted that. Then she kissed me and it surprised me. I made a mistake, Alex. She’s never going to forgive me.”
Alex shakes her head.
“I think we both know that Lena Luthor is too forgiving for her own good. Plus, you didn’t do anything wrong. You were in shock. She’ll understand.”
Kara lets a small smile slip, as she thinks about the woman whose heart she may have broken.
“You should talk to her, Kara. Don’t let her New Year start like this. Thinking she isn’t wanted.”
Kara’s eyes widen. “She’s wanted…Of course she’s wanted. I love her.”
Alex gives her a knowing look. “Well, I know that, dummy. But your girl is out there somewhere thinking she isn’t good enough. Are you gonna fix that? Or are you gonna sit here and mope all night?”
Kara furrows her brow, before giving her sister a determined nod. She wraps her arms around her. “Happy New Year, Al. I love you.”
--
“Lena?” Maggie calls out, when the elevator finally arrives on the top floor. She doesn’t get a reply, but she can hear the soft sniffles coming from the CEO’s office.
“Lena, what are you….” She trails off, as she walks inside to see the CEO curled up on her office chair, facing the city lights. Her feet are tucked under her body and her hands are wrapped firmly around a glass of whiskey. Maggie has never seen the normally outwardly confident woman looks so small, so young.
Lena quickly wipes her face of the tear tracks, but makes no move to face Maggie.
Maggie walks to Lena, with no hesitation and carefully takes the alcohol out of the woman’s hands. She gently tugs her to her feet, before wrapping her up in her arms.
Lena stifles her sobs, unwilling to allow herself to break in front of anyone. Maggie rubs her back with one hand, while the other settles at the back of Lena’s head, pulling her into her chest.
“You said she felt the same way.” Lena whispers, brokenly, as she pulls away from Maggie. She wipes away the tears that had escaped and looks accusingly at the shorter woman.
“I thought she did, Lena. I was sure of it. Even Alex thinks so.”
Lena shakes her head. She made the decision to act on her feelings, not Maggie. She can’t blame the other woman for trying to give her hope, no matter how blind it may have been.
“God, I’m so fucking stupid, Maggie. I-How could I expect Kara to have feelings for a Luthor?” She spits out her last name with venom in her voice.
“She deserves better than I could ever give her. I don’t blame her, truly. I just wish I’d kept my feelings to myself, so I wouldn’t be so damn embarrassed.” She finishes, before picking her glass up off her desk and downing the rest of it.
“That’s not it, Lena. You know that. Kara doesn’t care about your last name, okay? She doesn’t. And if she doesn’t want you in that way then it’s her loss. You’re hot.” She smirks, hoping to bring a smile to the young Luthor’s face.
Lena shrugs, indifferently. Maggie sighs. Silence takes over the office space, as Lena walks over to the large glass windows and looks out over the city. Fireworks are shooting off in every direction, the New Year celebration far from over in National City.
It isn’t until three soft knocks sound out against the opened office door does Lena turn around. Kara has her head popped through the doorway, a soft smile on her face. Lena immediately turns back towards the city and crosses her arms over her chest, wishing like hell she’d poured herself another drink before the reporter got here.
Maggie gives Kara an unimpressed look and walks over to Lena. “Call me if you need me to come back later. Please, go home at some point tonight, okay?” She says, softly. She places a firm kiss on Lena’s temple, before walking to Kara and tugging the taller woman outside of the office by her wrist.
“You better be here to fix this, Little Danvers. It’s fine if you don’t feel that way about her, but let her down easy, okay? I love you, but you hurt her tonight and I swear to god, I don’t care that you’re Alex’s little sister, I will get the whole police force on your ass. That woman deserves better than to be crying on New Year’s.” She motions towards Lena and doesn’t give Kara a chance to respond before leaving.
Kara shudders a bit at the threat, knowing Maggie isn’t bluffing. She takes in a deep breath, before tucking her nerves away and heading into the office.
“Lena?” Kara calls out softly. She slowly walks towards the CEO and settles a few steps behind where she’s standing.
When the younger woman makes no move to face her, Kara takes the last few steps to her and gently touches her arm. “Lena…”
Lena pulls away from the touch. “Kara, I’m okay. I just…I need some space.”
“No, I need to talk to you, Lee, please.”
“What’s there to talk about Kara? You don’t feel the same way. And that’s completely fine, it really is, but I just need a bit of time to digest. I thought you…I was so sure you loved me back and I-I guess I didn’t really think about the fact that you could react badly until it was too late.”
Kara shakes her head.
“Lena, look at me. Please.”
Lena sighs and shakes her head, slightly, before finally looking up to meet Kara’s eyes.
Kara reaches up and trails her fingers down Lena’s jawline, before gently gripping her chin gently to keep her in place. Lena looks up at her with wide, vulnerable eyes, allowing Kara to do what she wishes.
“I reacted badly. I was surprised and defensive and I wasn’t thinking. I love you, Lena, I do. I’m so sorry I didn’t react the way you wanted me to. If I could go back and do it again, I’d kiss you a thousand times over. You deserve the world, Lena Luthor. I just hope you’ll forgive my idioticy? Idiotism? Idio-How do you say that?”
“Idiocy.” Lena supplies, her lips twitching up into a small smile. Kara nods and rubs Lena’s cheek with her thumb in thanks.
“Right. Idiocy. I hope you can forgive my idiocy. Let me try again?” Kara finally asks, ending her ramble.
Lena furrows her brow and tries to pull away, but Kara tugs her back by her hip.
“I just…I need a minute.” Lena states with a watery smile, before pulling away again. Kara really has no reason to apologize and Lena knows it, but going from heartbroken to hopeful in such a short period of time has thrown her for a loop.
Kara watches her, carefully, as Lena pours herself another drink and sips it. After a few minutes of slowly nursing her drink, she finally places it down and tangles her fingers in front of her.
“You don’t have to apologize, Kara. You were surprised, I get it. It’s just…I’m still confused as to why you reacted that way, if I’m being honest?” She asks, quietly, leaning back against her desk.
“I had myself convinced that you could never feel the same way about me. Then you kissed me and I’d closed myself off so much from any hope of us being together that I forgot for a minute how I really feel and what I ended up stuttering out sounded much worse than I intended.”
Lena drops her gaze and twists her fingers more tightly together. Kara takes a deep breath and decides to just go for it, knowing there’s nothing left to lose.
“Ten. Nine. Eight. Seven.” Kara says, softly. She begins walking towards Lena, who looks at her curiously.
“Six. Five. Four. Three.” She finally stops in front of Lena and reaches out to cup the shorter woman’s cheek.
“Two. One.” She whispers, before leaning in. She hovers her lips over Lena’s, not wanting to overstep if the CEO still had any doubts, but Lena closes the gap.
The kiss is short, but Kara puts all the feelings she’s been suppressing into it, trying to prove to Lena that this isn’t some fluke.
Kara pulls away first. She rests her forehead against Lena’s.
“Happy New Year.” Kara whispers. Lena chuckles softly.
“It’s been New Year’s for two hours.” She whispers back, not wanted to break the comfortable quiet that they’ve found themselves in.
“It’s just turned New Year’s in Hawaii, though. We’re just celebrating with them, is all.” Kara states, motioning towards the clock, which has just struck 2 AM in National City.
Lena pulls back, but smiles widely. She looks down to her lap, before glancing back to Kara.
“I love you.” She forces herself to hold Kara’s gaze. She knows it was worth it, when a blinding smile takes over Kara’s face, bringing Lena to smile right back at her.
The blonde pulls Lena into a much more heated kiss, before pulling away just enough to whisper “I love you too” against the CEO’s lips.