Work Text:
Dean was feeling anxious, and he was working really hard to not think about why.
For once things were relatively okay. Castiel was finally back at the bunker, which meant that Dean didn’t have to constantly stress out about his safety. His mom and Jack were safe too, staying with Jody for a while so Jack could get to know some kids his own age.
Dean was really looking forward to hanging out with Cas, he already had a couple movies in mind that he wanted to make him watch. Cas was his best friend, Dean was just happier when he was around.
But somehow he was still feeling weird around Cas. If he was to be honest with himself, he would admit that he knew why, but the real reason was buried far too deep.
So Dean just continued to shove it down, going about business as usual.
The three of them were just finishing up dinner. Dean had insisted on making burgers to celebrate Castiel’s return. Sam had insisted on a side salad as well.
“It’s great to have you back, Cas,” Sam said, clapping his hand on the angel’s shoulder as he got up from the table. “I’m gonna head to bed now though, it’s late. Goodnight guys.”
Dean said goodnight to his brother before turning back to Cas. “I put fresh sheets on your bed,” he said with a smile. “I mean, I know you don’t sleep, but I figured that you still might want to sit up in bed or something. I don’t know. I figured fresh sheets would be nice.”
Great, he was rambling.
Castiel smiled fondly. “It is nice, Dean, thank you.” He held Dean’s gaze for a long moment, appearing to be simply enjoying his company.
Dean cleared his throat, feeling a sudden need to escape. “Okay, well you know where it is, so I guess I’m going to bed too.” He stood up from the table, gripping Castiel’s shoulder and gently squeezing, his fingers lingering a moment longer than they should have. “It’s good to have you home, Cas.”
“It’s good to be here,” Castiel said, looking up at Dean with an unreadable expression.
Dean cleared his throat again. “Okay, goodnight.”
He finally escaped to the privacy of his bedroom, stripping down to a t-shirt and briefs before getting into bed. As he lay awake he couldn’t help worrying about Cas. He’d been so different around Dean since he came back from the Empty, and in the light of day Dean would swear he didn’t know why.
But alone at night, Dean would admit to himself that he knew. He knew that everything had changed between them when Castiel had admitted he loved him, the night he’d nearly died at the hands of Ramiel and that damn staff.
And Dean hadn’t had the courage to admit he felt the same. Not then, and not now. And at the rate he was going, probably not ever.
Dean was woken by his bed shifting under someone else’s weight, and he was awake and leveling his gun at the intruder before his mind could process what he was seeing.
Gabriel. Standing on the foot of his bed, arms folded and grinning down at him. “Hey Dean-o, long time, no see.”
Dean glared, not lowering his gun. “Gabriel is dead. What are you?”
“I was dead,” Gabriel agreed. “Until my baby brother picked a fight with an ancient cosmic asshole. All the ruckus woke me up and I convinced him he needed to send me back too, or I would start shouting and wake more angels.” He grinned at Dean. “He didn’t want that, so here I am.”
Dean slowly lowered his gun. They hadn’t told anyone about Castiel’s experience in the Empty, so he had to admit this had to be the real Gabriel. Which didn’t entirely reassure him. “How did you get into the bunker? What do you want?”
Gabriel shrugged his shoulders. “Benefit of dying before all that drama upstairs, I still have my wings. And this place obviously isn’t warded against angels.” He cocked an eyebrow at Dean, looking suddenly cross. “As for what I want, well, can you imagine how irritating it is to come back eight years later, only to discover you two chuckle heads are still beating around the gay bush?”
Dean glared. “What are you talking about?”
“You and Cassy, dumb-dumb.” Gabriel rolled his eyes. “Clearly you need an intervention. And I’m bored, so I’ll take any excuse to fuck with time and space.” He bent over, bringing his face a little closer to Dean’s. “So let’s see if this helps you get that stick out of your ass.”
With that Gabriel snapped his fingers and vanished.
Dean’s hand clutched at the blanket, expecting he would have been zapped somewhere, but he was surprised to realize he was still in his bed. He was still wearing his grey t-shirt and black briefs. He looked down at his empty hand, startled when he realized his gun was gone, but when he turned to look for it he found it back where it belonged in the holster hidden between his bed and the bedside table.
Dean looked around his room in confusion, and that’s when he finally realized what was wrong. It was his room, but it was different. The first thing he noticed was a framed picture of him and Cas on his desk. They were grinning at the camera, arms slung around each other.
Dean had no memory of taking that picture.
There was also an entire book shelf on a wall that used to be empty, and Dean slowly rose from the bed to look at it. It was covered in books and random artifacts, some of which Dean recognized and some that he didn’t.
He definitely didn’t put that there.
“Who are you?”
He spun around at the sound of the familiar voice, and was startled to find Castiel standing in the doorway, wearing nothing but a towel around his waist. His hair was wet too, as if he’d just come from the shower. Since when did Cas shower?
“Cas? What the hell is going on?” Dean asked, taking a step toward him.
Castiel’s eyes grew wide, and he seemed to look through Dean’s chest before he looked him in the eye again. “Dean. For a moment I thought you must be an imposter, but I see now that it’s you. You just don’t belong here.”
Dean was getting irritated. “What the hell does that—” He cut himself off when he heard another voice in the hall.
The voice sounded exactly like Dean’s. “Cas? Who are you talking—”
Dean stared in shock as he watched another version of himself step up behind Castiel. Dean might have thought he was looking in a mirror, if the other Dean wasn’t also fresh from the showers and wrapped in a towel.
Dean instantly went to high alert, his mind immediately assuming this other version of himself was some kind of monster. He dove backwards for the gun, but Castiel seemed to anticipate his reaction, and he roughly shoulder checked him face first into the wall. The angel easily pinned him there.
“He is not a monster,” Castiel said, clearly knowing what Dean was thinking. “He is just a different version of you.”
The other Dean was grumbling behind Cas. “Great. He’s the real deal, yeah?”
“He is,” Castiel said. “His soul matches yours.”
“What the fuck is going on?” Dean demanded, trying to shrug off Castiel.
Cas finally let Dean go, and he stepped back so Dean could turn around. Dean was surprised that he still had the towel securely around his waist, and he tried not to look at the other man’s well defined chest.
“We knew this would happen eventually.” The other Dean glared at him as he pulled a pair of jeans out of a dresser and threw them at him. “Put those on and wait for us in the war room. We need to get dressed.”
Dean caught the pants just before he was unceremoniously shoved out of his own room, left facing the door closing in his face.
“What the hell.”
With his pants on, Dean made his way out of the war room. He looked around warily, still trying to figure out exactly where or when he was. Another alternate universe perhaps?
Things seemed mostly the same, with only a few changes. The laptop sitting on the table was new. And he noticed a collection of pictures on the wall.
He walked over closer to check them out. They were several dozen four by six prints that had been artfully arranged in a collage. There were pictures of him and Cas, his mom and Sam. Other people were there too, including Jack, Claire, and Jody. There were also a couple people Dean didn’t recognize, as well as a few older pictures of people they’d lost.
Dean noticed there were several pictures where Dean had an arm around Cas or the other way around. His eyebrows rose when he found one picture of Dean pressing a kiss to the angel’s cheek, Castiel grinning widely.
It had definitely seemed like this other version of himself and Cas had been showering together, and they’d both stayed in Dean’s room to get dressed.
Dean’s eyes went wide as he realized he was in some crazy alternaturnate universe where he and Cas were a… thing.
“Mom made that.”
Dean turned around to end up face to face with himself again. The other Dean was standing on the other side of the war room table, Castiel at his side. And the angel was wearing Dean’s favorite AC/DC shirt.
Dean frowned. “You’re wearing my clothes,” he said, looking at Castiel.
The other Dean glared at him. “No, he’s wearing my clothes,” he corrected. He glanced over at Castiel, and a smile cracked his face. “And yeah, he does that. I like it.”
Dean cleared his throat, gesturing between his other self and Castiel. “So, you two are…?”
“In a committed relationship, yes,” Castiel said.
The other Dean rolled his eyes, but cast a fond look toward Castiel. “Basically, yeah.” He turned back to Dean. “And it’s why you’re here.”
“What’s why I’m here?” Dean demanded.
The other Dean waved his hand between himself and Castiel, echoing the gestured Dean had just made. “This. Us. It’s the whole reason Gabriel sent you forward in time.”
Dean’s eyebrows shot up. “You know about that?”
The other Dean rolled his eyes. “Of course I know about it, dumbass. I’m you, you’re me. Everything that is happening to you, already happened to me.”
Dean thought about that. Time travel, not an alternate universe. That meant it was him in a relationship with Cas, how the fuck was that possible?
The other Dean was still talking. “Gabriel won’t send you back home until you get your shit together and admit you love Cas.”
Dean shook his head and put his hands up. “What? No. You must be mistaken, this has gotta be an alternate universe thing. I don’t love Cas.” He noticed the way Castiel frowned when he said that. “You know, as more than family.”
The other Dean growled and shook his head. “Yeah, you’re definitely from 2018, I was in some serious denial back then. Hate to break it to you, but you’re stuck here until you get over it.”
Dean ignored that last comment for the moment. “What year is it anyway?”
“2021,” Castiel said. “About three years into your future.”
“Dean? Why are you guys…” Sam stumbled up the stairs from the hall, hair a mess and still in his sleep clothes. He froze when he noticed both versions of his brother. “What the fuck is going on?”
“Time travel, Sammy,” the future version of Dean said, as if it were that simple.
Castiel decided to clarify. “A version of Dean from the past has been sent by Gabriel to visit us. He will be with us until he accepts he’s in love with the past version of myself.”
Sam gaped at them all for a moment. “I guess I’ll make up the guest room and go back to bed…” he muttered, turning around and stumbling out of the room.
Dean turned back to his other self. “Look, I just want to go home. If you’re me, then you should just be able to tell me what you did to convince Gabriel to send you back. We can jump right to the end.”
A look of realization flashed through the future Dean’s eyes, and his face darkened. “I can’t tell you that. The other Dean didn’t tell me, so I can’t tell you.”
Dean groaned. “Why not?”
“Because, if things don’t go the way they’re supposed to, then you don’t go home and get together with Cas,” the other Dean said, sounding angry. “And there’s not a chance in hell I’m doing anything to risk that! So settle in, you’re gonna be here a while,” he snapped.
“We’ll see about that,” Dean threatened. But he knew he was stuck for the moment, so he turned to leave the room. “Aw fuck it, I’m going to bed.” He suddenly stopped and turned back. “Wait, are Mom and Jack here?”
His other self shook his head. “Not right now. They’re okay, but that’s all I can tell you.”
Dean growled in frustration, shaking his head as he stomped down the hall. “Sam?”
Sam stepped out of Castiel’s room, brows furrowing as he looked at Dean. “Which one are you?”
Dean rolled his eyes. “The one from the past.”
Sam nodded, clearly still too tired to process that. “Well I put fresh sheets on the bed, so it’s all yours.”
“That room belongs to Cas,” Dean said.
Sam looked at Dean like he was an idiot. “Castiel shares your room,” he said, then frowned. “Er, uh, Dean’s room. Present Dean. Shit, I’m too tired for this.” He rubbed a hand over his eyes. “Look, just let me go back to bed, I’ll answer your questions in the morning, okay?”
Dean sighed. “Yeah, sure Sammy.”
Dean stepped into the room and closed the door behind him. He didn’t know what time of night it had been when Gabriel zapped him here, but he felt drained, and his head had barely hit the pillow when he was out.
The next morning Dean got up and dressed, not sure what the day would bring. When he opened the bedroom door, he found a pile of clean clothes on the floor. He picked them up, realizing it was some of his own shirts and jeans, plus some items he didn’t recognize. But it all looked like something he would wear. He realized the other version of himself must have left them for him.
He put the clothes away before heading out to the kitchen, hoping someone was already up and coffee was brewing, because boy did he need it.
He heard voices as he approached, and he paused, not able to resist the temptation to eavesdrop. He could hear his own voice and Castiel’s.
“It does not bother me, Dean,” Castiel was saying. “He is you and you are him. I cannot separate my love from one or the other of you.”
“Yeah, well it bothers me!” the other Dean snapped. “I know how this ends, and I’m not okay with sharing!”
“You’re not sharing me, not really,” Castiel said. “It will be okay, Dean. We will complete the timeline and he will go back.”
Dean edged around the corner, and he was startled to see the other version of himself in Castiel’s arms. Dean had his face on Castiel’s shoulder, and Cas had his arms around his waist, one hand running gently up and down the other man’s back. Cas smiled and pressed a kiss to Dean’s forehead, murmuring soft words.
Dean stumbled back out of the doorway, his heart constricting painfully. He leaned back against the wall, confused why he was suddenly a little short of breath.
He’d just seen his most private dreams come to life. This other version of himself had everything he’d never been able to admit he wanted. Everything he knew he could never have. It was more than Dean was prepared to process, so he ran.
Dean was hiding in the back of the library, sitting in one of two armchairs that had been tucked into the corner. He was flipping through a book of spells, trying to find something that might send him home.
“You’re not going to find anything in that book,” Sam said, appearing next to Dean with two cups of coffee in hand, handing one to him. “Dean, uh, the other Dean said I’d find you here.”
Dean glowered a little, but took the coffee, taking a sip. He’d never gotten up the nerve to go into the kitchen and get some. “Thanks.” He smiled a little at Sam, glad that at least his brother seemed the same.
Sam sat down on the chair next to Dean, and he leveled his patented I’m-worried-about-you stare. “So I imagine all this has been quite a shock for you.”
Dean rolled his eyes. “You think, Sammy?” He couldn’t quite look at his brother, so he focused on drinking his coffee.
“I’m not going to push you,” Sam said. “I know you’ll need to work this out on your own time.” He paused, considering his words carefully. “I just wanted to say, you—present you—have been happier in these last few years with Cas than I’ve ever seen you your whole life. So I know this is hard, but it’s worth it.”
Dean stared into his coffee, not at all ready to talk about any of it. “Thanks, Sammy.”
Sam gave him a pat on the knee, then left him to his thoughts.
Dean spent the rest of the afternoon hiding in the library, pouring over one book after another. It didn’t do him any good, there wasn’t anything close to powerful enough to send him back. And to make things worse, his stomach was growling at him.
“I told Sammy to tell you the books won’t help.”
Dean looked up, glaring at himself. “He told me.”
The other Dean shrugged. “Well suit yourself. But you’re not getting out of here until you play along with what Gabriel wants. Which means spending time with me and Cas. Especially Cas.” He raised an eyebrow. “And I know you haven’t eaten all day, so you should come have dinner.”
Dean felt irrationally defensive. “How do you know I haven’t eaten?”
The other man just rolled his eyes. “I’ve literally been you, doing exactly what you’re doing right now. How many times do I have to explain that to you?”
“Yeah, yeah,” Dean grumbled, closing the book and dropping it on the table. His stomach rumbled again. “Okay fine, dinner.”
Dean followed his future self into the kitchen, where they found Castiel at the stove, working on what looked like burgers. He was wearing another t-shirt and jeans combo that had clearly been stolen from the future Dean’s closet.
Dean went straight to the fridge and cracked open a beer, moving to park himself at the table. He was going to need more than a few beers to get through this dinner.
He was surprised to see the other Dean slip in next to Cas and start to help. The two of them moved like a well oiled machine, working together to finish assembling the burgers. They were chatting easily about their day, speaking vaguely about something they’d been researching. Whatever it was, clearly they didn’t think Dean should know about it.
Dean couldn’t help but watch all the little moments of affection that passed between the two of them. A brush of a hand on the small of the back, the arm, the neck. Little smiles and words of affection. It wasn’t over the top, but it was far more than Dean expected from any version of himself.
Sam wandered into the room and sat down next to Dean just as the burgers were being dished up. Cas brought their plates over and the four of them sat down together around the table.
Dean noticed that Sam’s presence didn’t change how Cas and his other self interacted. They sat close, shoulders pressed together. Dean was surprised to see they didn’t care about what Sam saw, and equally as surprised at how Sam ignored it all, as if it were commonplace.
They started to eat in an awkward silence, and Dean was determined to keep to himself. But he couldn’t help but notice that Castiel was eating too, and he seemed to be really enjoying his burger.
Dean cleared his throat, his curiosity getting the better of him. “So uh, you eat food now Cas?”
Cas looked up at him. “Yes. After Dean and I got together, I chose to partially drain my grace. But I still retain some of it, enough to heal a serious wound in an emergency, although it does drain me significantly now.”
Dean frowned. He didn’t like the idea of Cas giving up anything for him. “Why the hell would you do that?”
“I desired a more human existence.” Cas glanced at his Dean. “So that I could more properly enjoy human pleasures and emotions. It particularly makes sex more enjoyable.”
Sam groaned and both Deans shifted in their seats, clearly embarrassed.
“What did you do with your grace?” Dean asked.
Dean’s future self reached inside the front of his shirt and pulled out a small vial on a chain around his neck. It glowed a soft blue. “He asked me to keep it safe for him,” he said, voice full of fond affection.
Dean was floored. He liked to think Cas trusted him, but holding his grace was several levels higher than he deserved. He glared at his other self. “You’d sure as hell better keep that safe.”
“I protect it with my life,” the other man said, entirely serious. He reached out and took Castiel’s hand in his, squeezing it gently before he let go and returned to his dinner.
Things grew silent, and Dean ate his burger. It was fixed exactly the way he liked it, which shouldn’t surprise him given the circumstances. He glanced tentatively at Cas. “The burger is really good,” he said, hoping the other man would take the small olive branch.
Castiel smiled, a wide, happy grin. “Thank you, Dean.”
Dean lay awake in bed that night, visions of himself and Castiel in his mind. He couldn’t stop thinking about how happy his other self had looked, and how comfortable he seemed to be. Dean never thought he could be so content, especially not in a relationship with another man.
Sure, in the privacy of his own mind he couldn’t deny that he had some feelings for Cas. Some very intense feelings. He just never thought he would act on them. Never thought they could amount to anything more than heartache.
Relationships always ended in pain for Dean. He’d written love out of his life a long time ago.
But here he was, face to face with solid evidence that he could indeed have everything he wanted.
But only if he could find the courage to ask for it.
When Dean slowly made his way into the kitchen the next morning he was relieved and a little disappointed to find only Sam sitting at the table, drinking coffee.
His brother looked up at him. “Coffee is on,” he said, gesturing to the pot. “Dean and Cas… Um, our Dean and Cas had to go collect something. They’ll be back in a couple hours.”
Dean frowned a little, pouring himself a cup and moving to join Sam at the table. “You guys are working a case, aren’t you?”
Sam looked a little sheepish. “Yeah. Sorry, it’s just that Dean wasn’t told about the case when he was you, so we figure that means we can’t tell you either. Because, you know…”
Dean grumbled and ran a hand through his hair. “I hate paradoxes.”
Sam smiled. “Yeah, tell me about it.” He considered Dean for a moment. “So, how are you doing with… you know.”
Dean took a long sip of coffee, debating how he wanted to reply. “Okay, I guess. Considering.” He looked up at Sam, forcing himself to ask the question. “Tell me, didn’t it bother you? When I supposedly came back from this time hop and just suddenly announced my undying love? I can’t imagine you were just okay with it.” He felt his chest clench as he waited for Sam’s reply, and realized he was far more worried about what Sam thought than he was admitting to himself.
Sam just laughed, startling Dean. “Seriously? I was relieved!”
Dean frowned, confused. “What? Relieved?”
Sam rolled his eyes. “Dean, you’ve been crazy about Cas for years. I was just happy you finally acted on it. I was afraid you never would.”
“How the hell…?” Dean stared at his brother, trying to figure out how he’d known. “Am I really that transparent?”
Sam shrugged. “Probably not to anyone else, but I know you.” His eyes grew soft, that oh so familiar puppy dog look. “Dean, I know about Mark.”
Dean felt his stomach drop and he actually physically recoiled. He couldn’t speak for a moment, but he managed to find his words. “How the hell do you know about that?” he growled.
“I was fifteen Dean, I wasn’t blind,” Sam said. “I knew there was something going on.” He looked down at the table for a long moment before looking up at Dean again. “And I know it’s why you and Dad had that horrible fight. Right before we left town and you never saw him again.”
Dean was quiet for a long time, not able to look at Sam. This was a part of himself he’d never intended to share with his brother. Had never intended to unbox again. He’d put it away the day he’d walked away from Mark.
Dean had known from a young age that he was attracted to both men and women. And at nineteen he’d met a beautiful man just a few years older than him, when they’d spent a couple months in Boston. For a few weeks they’d had a great time together.
Until John had found out. He’d been furious. Had given Dean the choice to break up with Mark or never see Sammy again. Ever the loyal soldier, Dean had done as he was told. And after that he didn’t let himself look twice at a good looking man until long after his father was dead.
“Dean, I’m not like Dad,” Sam insisted. “I just want you to be happy. To be yourself.” He smiled tentatively. “You know I was actually really excited when you finally started to flirt with guys again.”
Dean snorted, feeling something inside him start to unwind. “A little flirting never hurt anyone…” He stared down at his coffee cup for a long time. “For years I swore that Mark was a one time thing, an experiment. That I had no interest in repeating.”
Sam considered him carefully. “Until you met Cas.”
Dean’s heart constricted, and he wasn’t sure if it was more pain or hope. “Until Cas,” he admitted.
They were quiet for a moment before Sam spoke again. “So, when you go home. I already know you’re bisexual, so you don’t need to like, come out to me or anything. Just make it official with Cas and tell me you finally asked him out.” He smiled reassuringly. “I’ll be thrilled, I promise.”
Dean let that label bounce around his mind for a minute. He’d rarely let himself consider it, but he knew it was the truth. Bisexual. He could handle that.
Maybe.
Dean was reading a random lore book in the library when he heard the clang of the bunker door, announcing the return of Cas and his counterpart. He could hear them talking as they came down the stairs, and he watched as they came into view and paused at the bottom. They were discussing something quietly, from the looks of it Dean’s future self was irritated and Cas was trying to reassure him.
Dean couldn’t pull his gaze away from the two of them. He watched as Castiel cupped his Dean’s jaw in his hand while they spoke. Clearly they believed they were alone. They spoke quietly for a moment before Cas leaned in and pressed a lingering kiss to Dean’s lips.
Dean’s mouth went dry as he watched the two kiss. It was gentle at first, then it deepened and became more passionate. His stomach twisted with something that felt suspiciously like jealousy as Castiel’s arms went around the other Dean’s waist, pulling them closer together.
Just when things looked like they would get heated, Castiel pulled back, leaving one last chaste kiss. His hands lingered around the future Dean’s waist while they spoke quietly, and Dean could see his counterpart seemed to be appeased. Whatever had been bothering him seemed resolved.
They finally split apart, and Dean’s older self left for the kitchen, while Castiel turned and walked into the library. Dean straightened in his chair when he realized he was headed for him.
“Uh, hey Cas, what’s up?” Dean asked, trying to hide how horribly affected he was. He couldn’t help but lick his lips as he looked up at Castiel.
Cas smiled and took the seat at the table next to him. “I just wanted to check in and see how you’re doing.” His blue eyes reflected compassion. “My Dean was telling me how stressful this was for him, when he was you.”
Dean’s heart fluttered at the words ‘My Dean’ coming from Castiel’s lips. “Oh, well thanks. I’m doing okay, I guess. Better today.”
Castiel nodded. “I’m happy to hear that. You’re incredibly important to me Dean, I will do anything I can to make this easier for you.”
Dean wasn’t sure what to say, but he did think of a question that had been bothering him. “Yeah, um, so Cas. I know you love him, but did you really feel that way back then? You know, in 2018?”
A fond expression crossed Castiel’s face as he considered the question. “I believe I first started to fall in love with you the day I pulled your soul from hell,” he said. “I felt something then, somehow I knew we were bound.” His blue eyes searched Dean’s. “And I only grew more devoted to you as time passed. But it was after Metatron stole my grace, when I lived fully human for a time, that was when I realized the true extent of my love for you. So yes, your Cas loves you very much. I’ve lived a very long life, Dean Winchester, and loving you has been the best of it.”
Dean was speechless. His heart leapt, and he knew that everything Castiel said was true for him as well, that he’d been his since the day they met. But he wasn’t at all ready to voice any of that, so he ducked his head and cleared his throat. “Yeah, uh, you’re really important to me too, Cas.” He wished he could say more, but that was the best he could manage.
“My Dean will be working on dinner for a little while,” Cas said. “He suggested that you and I could take a walk. He says it’s important that we spend time together.”
Dean looked at Cas for a moment, before nodding. “Okay.”
The two of them walked in silence for a while, simply wandering through the trees that hid the bunker. Dean had almost been expecting Cas to want to hold his hand, or something else corny, but it really was no different than when he’d spent time with his Cas back home. They were walking very close together, but Dean had to admit they’d always done that.
Dean had something weighing on his mind, and he decided perhaps Cas would be the right person to open up to. It was too personal for Sam and talking to his other self just irritated him. He glanced over at Castiel. “I’ve been wondering… The other Dean, how is he handling all this? Is he like… an out and proud bisexual now or some shit?”
Castiel smiled to himself. “Dean told me you’d ask these questions, and that I could answer freely.” He looked over at him. “It wasn’t easy at first. It took him a while to get comfortable with our relationship, and it took longer still for him to allow anyone but Sam to know about it.” He paused for a moment before continuing. “He will sometimes tell people he’s bisexual. But generally he dislikes being labeled.”
Dean nodded, considering that. He knew that whatever happened here in this time, it wouldn’t mean he’d magically go home and everything would be perfect. It would still take time and effort to get to where his future self is now. “Well I’m sorry you have to put up with all that crap,” he muttered.
“Dean.” Cas stopped, putting a hand on Dean’s arm to turn him, so he could look him in the face. “It is not crap and you are not a burden.”
Dean wanted to object, but then Castiel’s hand came to his face and gently cupped his jaw, just like he’d seen Cas do with his future self. He was startled by how easy and comfortable the touch felt, and he was reminded that for Castiel it was a perfectly natural thing to do.
Castiel pulled his hand back, looking chagrined. “I am sorry if I made you uncomfortable. It is difficult for me to separate you from my Dean.”
“You didn’t make me uncomfortable,” Dean admitted, reaching out to touch Castiel’s arm. “It, uh… It actually felt really nice.” He looked at his feet, feeling his cheeks heat. “You don’t need to seperate us. If you don’t want to.”
Dean wanted to know. He wanted to experience what this Dean had.
Castiel smiled, and his hand returned to Dean’s face, his thumb stroking gently over his cheek bone. “I would like that.”
Dean couldn’t help but lean into the touch. He could feel it draining some of the anxiety from him, and he wasn’t entirely convinced that Cas wasn’t using a little of his remaining grace.
Castiel stepped a little closer to Dean. “If you don’t want me to seperate the two of you…” He looked a little mischievous. “Then I would kiss you right now.”
Dean’s eyes went wide, and he was pretty sure his heart actually did skip a beat, although he’d definitely never admit it. When he finally spoke, his voice was a hoarse whisper. “I think I’d like that.”
Dean found himself holding his breath as Castiel leaned in and pressed a chaste kiss to his lips, before pulling away, smiling. Dean felt torn between relief and frustration. A big part of him wanted a real, proper kiss, but another part wasn’t sure he was ready for that. So he settled for just returning Castiel’s smile as they continued their walk.
By the time they finally made it back to the bunker, things had become more relaxed between them. Dean was starting to realize things really weren’t all that different, he could pretty much treat this Cas the same as the Cas who was his best friend back home.
Only he could kiss this Cas, if he wanted to.
If he had the nerve.
Dean followed Cas down the stairs into the bunker, his mind wrapped up thinking about everything. He almost didn’t notice when Cas paused at the bottom, and Dean barely stopped before he ran into him. He found himself one step above Cas, looking down into bright blue eyes.
“You’ve gone quiet again,” Cas said, concerned.
Dean offered a small smile. “Just thinking about everything.” He tentatively reached out to put a hand on the other man’s shoulder. It wasn’t even something he wouldn’t have done back home, but somehow it felt different now. “Good thoughts, don’t worry.”
Castiel’s hands came to Dean’s hips and he craned his head to press a kiss to Dean’s jaw. “I’m pleased.”
Dean shivered, his whole body responding to Castiel’s simple touch. He found himself reaching out to run his fingers through Castiel’s hair, surprised to find it was incredibly soft. He’d always wondered what his hair felt like, it was almost surreal to be touching it now. He let his fingers linger, tangling and carding through. Castiel tipped his head up in response to the touch, and Dean found himself ducking to press another simple kiss to his lips. Then he cleared his throat and pulled back, surprised by his own actions.
Castiel didn’t seem phased. “I think it’s time for dinner,” he said. He seemed to see that Dean was feeling a little overwhelmed, and he gently pulled away. “Come.” His hand gently brushed Dean’s arm, beckoning him, before he let it drop and he turned to head for the kitchen.
Dean found himself following Cas without thinking, still a little stunned.
They found Sam on his laptop at the table and the older Dean at the stove. He looked tense and he was glaring at the mashed potatoes he was finishing.
Dean watched from the doorway as Castiel went to him, putting a hand on his back and kissing his cheek, murmuring something in his ear. He watched his other self relax a little under the touch and turn to offer Cas a small smile. He was surprised to see a hint of anxiety in his own eyes, and he realized with a start that the other Dean knew everything that had just happened between him and Cas. Of course he did, he’d been him once. And he clearly wasn’t entirely comfortable with the situation.
Dean decided to give them some space, and he grabbed a beer and went to sit next to Sam. His brother immediately turned the laptop so he couldn’t see what he was working on, and Dean rolled his eyes. “I’m not gonna peak, chill out Sammy.”
“Sorry.” Sam laughed, looking a little embarrassed. “Just gotta make sure, this whole time travel thing is freaky.”
“I know,” Dean said, taking a sip of his beer. “But I figure if Gabriel has the power to create this situation then he has the power to make sure we don’t fuck shit up too badly.” He looked over at his other self, now plating up dinner with Castiel. “Besides, he went through all this and came out the other end without changing the future, so we should be fine.”
“Or he already changed the future and we just don’t know because we’re living in it,” Sam said, shrugging his shoulders.
Dean groaned. “Okay, if I think about this too much I’ll lose my mind, let’s find something else to talk about. Tell me, has Winds Of Winter been published yet?”
Sam laughed. “You know I can’t tell you things like that.”
Dean grinned. “Yeah well, can’t blame a guy for trying.”
A plate of steak and mashed potatoes suddenly appeared in front of Dean, and he looked up at Castiel with a smile. “Thanks, Cas.”
Cas returned the smile and affectionately ran his hand over the back of Dean’s neck before he moved to sit next to the other Dean.
Dean blushed faintly and ducked his face to his food, not wanting to see Sam’s reaction to that little display of affection. He just dug into his meal instead.
Dinner passed relatively easily, and Dean was mostly silent while the other three tried to have a coded conversation about their case without saying things Dean shouldn’t know. Dean didn’t really care, he was busy wrapped up in his own thoughts. Thinking about Cas, and his Cas, and what life would be like when he went back. Assuming things progressed for him the same way they did for his future self.
He couldn’t help but watch the way the other Dean and Cas were interacting, and he found himself craving that level of easy intimacy. They sat so close together, and he was pretty sure Cas had a hand on Dean’s leg under the table. He suddenly realized he could recognize desire on his own face as the other Dean whispered something in Castiel’s ear. Dean watched in fascination as Cas pinked up faintly, grinning and nodding.
The elder Dean got up, clearing his plate. “Okay, goodnight folks. Come on, Cas.”
Cas got up as well. “We will see you in the morning,” he said, picking up his dishes. “Goodnight Dean, Sam.”
Dean watched as the two left the room together, Castiel’s hand on the small of Dean’s back.
“Word of advice,” Sam said, “don’t get too close to their bedroom door unless you’re prepared to hear some things.”
Dean’s face warmed at the suggestion. “Uh, thanks Sammy.”
Sam laughed lightly at Dean’s embarrassment, but his eyes were kind. “So, looks like you and Cas are getting to know each other a little better.”
Dean cleared his throat, wanting to change the subject. “Look Sammy, there’s something else I gotta know.” His heart was beating hard, a large part of him terrified to know the answer to his question. “How does Mom take it?”
It took Sam a moment to realize what Dean meant, and when he did his expression softened. “It was a little hard for her at first,” he said, then hurried to add, “but not for the reason you think. She was worried about you, and Cas too. She grew up in a time when it could be downright dangerous to be in a relationship with someone of the same gender. It took her some time to accept that things are a lot better now.” He grinned at Dean. “Not to mention you guys can obviously protect yourselves just fine.”
Dean relaxed a little, and the knot in his stomach started to unwind. “So she’s cool with it?”
“Yeah, she is,” Sam said. “She’s actually kind of embarrassingly supportive now,” he said with a laugh. “So you have that to look forward to.”
Dean chuckled. “Yeah, great.” He smiled at Sam, feeling much better. “Thank you. I’m going to hit the sack now, I’ll see you in the morning.”
Sam nodded. “Goodnight, Dean.”
Dean headed out of the kitchen and down the hall, only to slow as he approached his room, Dean’s room. Sam’s warning echoed in his mind, and he couldn’t resist pausing to listen. His face colored when he immediately heard soft sounds coming through the door.
He could hear the rumble of Castiel’s voice, although he couldn’t quite make out what he was saying. And he could hear himself, and he sounded absolutely wrecked. He couldn’t quite make out the words, but he knew from personal experience he was begging through his moans. Then he was finally able to catch what he was saying, and his breath caught as his other self begged, “harder Cas, please…”
Dean stumbled away from the door, shocked and incredibly aroused to realize what that meant. He hurried into the guest room and quickly shut the door behind him, leaning heavily against it, his hand going to his quickly swelling cock in his jeans.
He’d never bottomed for Mark, but god he’d wanted to. He just hadn’t had the courage to try it before things had blown up between them. He hadn’t yet let himself think too much about what sex was like between his other self and Cas, but now his mind was filling with images.
Dean couldn’t help it, he stripped off his jeans and moved to the bed, palming his cock through his briefs as he stretched out. It throbbed in his hand as he imagined Cas thrusting into him, using his incredible strength to pin him to the bed. God, it would feel so good to surrender to him.
He bit back a groan as he pulled his hard cock out, using pre-come to slick up his hand as he started to stroke himself. His other hand pushed lower, just barely teasing at the rim of his entrance.
Suddenly so much about the dynamic between Cas and his other self made sense. He’d seen how Dean leaned on Cas, and even with women Dean had always loved a partner who wasn’t afraid to take charge. There was just something about submitting that always got Dean excited.
Dean’s hand moved faster over his cock, his hips thrusting up to meet it, and he let out a soft moan as the pleasure built. He closed his eyes, envisioning himself being manhandled by Cas, strong hands gripping his hips as a thick cock fucked him hard.
Before Dean knew it he was coming, and he arched up on the bed as white hot pleasure exploded through him, before finally slumping down again.
He was left panting and stunned, mind still catching up to this new discovery. He really couldn’t deny what he wanted from Cas, not anymore.
It took Dean a long time to fall asleep that night.
Dean had a hard time looking anyone in the eye the next morning as he walked into the kitchen. He was sure that if they looked too closely they’d be able to tell what he’d been thinking. Was still thinking, and couldn’t get out of his mind. He made a beeline for the coffee pot, hoping the others would mistake his silence for under caffeination.
He could feel the other Dean’s eyes on him, and he knew that was the one person in the room he couldn’t hide from. The other man knew exactly what he’d been fantasizing about.
“Good morning, Dean,” Cas said, coming up next to him at the counter to refill his own coffee cup. “How did you sleep?” His hand came to rest on the small of Dean’s back for a moment.
Dean’s heart raced and he flushed. “Um, fine,” he said, hiding his face in his coffee, escaping to the kitchen table, sitting down next to Sam and across from his other self.
Future Dean rolled his eyes at him. “Calm down, princess,” he taunted, sounding irritable. “Nobody knows but me.” He leered at Dean.
Dean glared at him, face going red. “Shut up,” he snapped.
Sam shifted awkwardly, looking back and forth between the two of them in confusion.
Across the room, Cas spoke up. “I’m going to go complete the… preparations,” he said, taking his coffee as he left the room.
Dean frowned, suddenly distracted from his predicament. “Preparations?”
Sam nodded. “For the case.” He glanced over at the elder Dean. “We actually need to leave for a day or two to finish it up. Dean and I, Cas is going to stay here with you.”
Dean glared. “I don’t need a babysitter, he can go with you.”
The other Dean shook his head, clearly annoyed with him. “No he’s gotta stay. He stayed when I was you, so he stays now.” He leveled a look at Dean. “You have to prove yourself to Gabriel so he’ll let you go home.”
Sam cleared his throat and got up, taking his coffee with him. “I’m gonna go pack.” He quickly escaped the room, clearly wanting to get away from the conversation.
Both Deans watched Sam go before they turned back to each other. They were silent for a long moment before the elder Dean finally spoke, voice rough and frustrated. “Look, I’m not happy about this. Cas is mine, you have your own Cas at home.” He took a deep breath and sighed. “But this has to happen. You have to figure things out with Cas, so you can go back home and be with your Cas. Because if you don’t…”
Dean realized what his other self meant. That tonight was the night, it was how it had happened for him, so it was how it must happen for Dean. His heart raced at the implication.
“Cas is the best damn thing that has ever happened to me,” the elder Dean said, speaking with sincerity. He leaned over the table, staring Dean down. “If you don’t get this ball rolling with him then we never get together, and I won’t let that happen. So please, I need you to do this.” He was begging now, eyes shimmering with emotion. “Just trust him. He will make you happier than you ever knew was possible.”
Dean felt short of breath, but he nodded. “I… Yeah, I can do that.”
The other Dean seemed to relax a little. “Okay. Good.” He abruptly got up from the table. “We’ll be gone in an hour and we won’t be back until morning, I expect you to use the most of your time,” he said.
With that, he was gone, and Dean was left alone with his racing mind.
Dean hid in the kitchen for a while, torn between desire and fear. He was pretty sure his other self meant that he was going to have to sleep with Cas, that seemed like the kind of proof Gabriel would want. And god did he want that to happen.
But he was also scared shitless.
He finally decided to venture out to the war room when he heard Sam and the other Dean getting ready to leave.
They each had a bag packed, the elder Dean was already halfway up the stairs, Cas watching him go. They’d clearly already said their goodbyes. Sam noticed him and crossed the room to meet him.
“Hey Dean,” Sam said. “Our Dean says you should be gone when we get back. So I guess this is goodbye.” He gave him a reassuring pat on the shoulder. “Everything will work out, you’ll see.”
Dean nodded, truly appreciating his brother in that moment. “Thanks, Sam. For everything.” He leaned in and gave his brother a big hug, giving him a firm smack on the back for good measure. “Bye Sammy. Don’t do anything dumb on your hunt.”
“Bye Dean.” Sam smiled as he pulled away, squeezing Dean’s shoulder before he turned to leave.
Dean looked up at his future self, standing at the top of the stairs. He offered him a nod, hoping he’d understand his gratitude. The other man simply returned his nod before turning and walking out of the bunker.
With the heavy clang of the door, they were gone. Dean looked over at Cas, his mouth going dry when he realized they were now alone.
With the whole weight of the paradox hanging over Dean’s head, expecting him to follow through. He felt his breath start to quicken.
“It’s okay, Dean,” Castiel said, noticing Dean’s distress and moving closer. “I know this is a lot, but nothing will happen if you don’t want it to.” He paused in front of Dean, but kept his hands to himself. “We’ll just spend the day together, like any other day.”
Dean felt himself relax a little, and he nodded. “Yeah, okay.” He considered the other man for a moment. “Why don’t you let me make you breakfast?”
Cas grinned. “I’d like that.”
Once back in the kitchen, Cas sat at the table while Dean got to work on bacon and french toast. They managed to slip back into easy conversation, both of them now a little more accustomed to avoiding topics time travel wouldn’t let them discuss.
When Dean finally had both their meals plated he brought them over to the table, sliding in to sit next to Cas. On a whim he leaned over and pressed a kiss to Castiel’s cheek, his own face going pink as he turned his attention back to his food.
“Thank you, Dean,” Cas murmured, leaning a little more into his space.
As they ate Castiel’s hand moved to rest on Dean’s thigh under the table, just as he’d imagined it might, and it made his stomach flip with happiness.
After breakfast they decided to watch a movie together, settling on a rewatch of The Dark Knight. Dean screwed up his courage and sat down right next to Cas, pressing himself up against the other man’s side. He was wearing a soft t-shirt, so Dean could feel the warmth of skin on skin as their arms pressed together.
Castiel reached for his hand, taking it in his and interlacing their fingers. As the movie started he squeezed gently, slowly running his thumb across the back of Dean’s hand.
Dean couldn’t remember ever being this happy, just to sit with someone. It was such a simple, almost platonic thing, but it was amazing to just hold someone’s hand. Especially since that someone was Cas.
When the movie was over, Castiel declared that it was his turn to make lunch. So he sat and watched as Cas whipped up Dean’s favorite burger, just for him. They chatted easily about the movie, their conversation continuing as they sat down to eat.
As soon as they were done, Castiel’s hand found Dean’s thigh again, resting warmly. Dean smiled and leaned into the man, enjoying the thrum of energy the touch sent through his body. He let out a content sigh and turned to press a kiss to Castiel’s shoulder, before lifting his head again to look at him.
Castiel’s eyes were bright with love as he leaned in to press a kiss to Dean’s lips, just for a moment, then pulled away. He cupped Dean’s face, brushing a thumb across Dean’s lips. “We have all day,” he said. “Will you join me on another walk?”
Dean just nodded. He would go anywhere with Cas.
This time as they walked Castiel took Dean’s hand in his, leading him through the woods. They spent a couple hours just talking, enjoying each other’s company. Conversation flowed easily between them, then eventually drifted into a comfortable silence.
Dean noticed Castiel was thinking about something, he appeared to be deep in thought. He almost seemed sad, which Dean didn’t understand. They were having such a nice time, he didn’t know what could be getting to him.
They walked a little further, until they came around a bend in the path and Dean was surprised to find a pond that he’d never noticed before. It was rimmed with green grass and white flowers, and a couple rabbits were nibbling at the plants on the far shore.
“This is one of my favorite spots,” Castiel said, looking out over the water. “My Dean and I come here sometimes, just to sit and talk.”
Dean watched Castiel as he spoke, noticing the other man still seemed quite melancholy. He was staring out at the pond, but his mind seemed to be far away.
Castiel looked down at Dean’s hand in his own. “Dean. I don’t know what he told you, but you do not need to do this if you don’t want to.” He looked up at him, eyes shining brightly, face furrowed with deep concern. “I love you very much. But to know that our relationship was born out of something you didn’t want would destroy me. I would rather remain just your friend than do that to you.” His eyes were sad, but determined. “We can call it all off, right now, if that’s what you want.”
Dean was stunned, and he stared at Castiel. For a moment he truly considered it. He didn’t have to play along with Gabriel’s little game. He could refuse, Gabriel would probably cave and send him back, and he could go back to life as usual.
But then he looked at Cas, saw the fear and sadness in the angel’s eyes. He found himself thinking about everything Cas had ever done for him. He’d always known how much Cas had sacrificed for him, but he’d never really thought about how selfless the man was. He seemed to be singularly focused on making Dean happy. On protecting him and helping him, in any way that he could.
Dean’s mind was made up, he didn’t need any more time to think it over.
Dean grinned, feeling suddenly reckless and carefree. “I love you,” he said, stepping in closer to Cas. “It’s like you said before. I think we really have had some kind of bond, ever since you hauled my ass out of hell. But it’s so much more than that, too.” He reached up to run a hand over Castiel’s face, enjoying the way the other man lit up under his touch. “You’ve been taking care of me, ever since. And I would do anything for you. I can’t believe I’ve gotten this damn lucky, that this is the future I get to look forward to.”
They were suddenly both moving, and they met in the middle, lips meeting in a searing kiss. A real kiss. Castiel’s strong arms wrapped around Dean’s waist, pulling him closer, and Dean’s arms went around the other man’s neck, fingers tangling in his hair. Their lips fit together perfectly, tongues deepening the kiss. Castiel moved with practiced grace, while Dean explored for the first time. Dean could feel desire rising, demanding and craving. He kissed Cas more desperately, feeling his need overtaking him.
Cas finally pulled back, both of them breathing hard as they stared at each other for a moment.
Dean licked his lips, eyes flickering from Castiel’s mouth back up to his eyes. “I’m ready,” he whispered, catching himself by surprise. But his body agreed, he didn’t want to wait anymore. “More than ready.”
Castiel’s eyes grew dark and there was a new intensity about him. “Okay. Come,” he took Dean’s hand again and lead him back towards the bunker. It took them awhile to get there, neither of them able to resist pausing to trade kisses along the way.
They finally made it back to the bunker, and Cas lead him down the stairs and down the hall, and Dean’s heart raced with anticipation as they stepped into their room. It looked the same as it had the day Dean had appeared in their bed, only now it held so much more weight for him. He could see his life mixed with Castiel’s now, and the room just felt right.
He turned to Cas with a smile and pressed a firm kiss to his lips, heart too full for words.
Cas just kissed him back, and he found the hem of Dean’s shirt, slowly starting to tug upward. “Is this okay?”
Dean nodded. “Yes.” He let the other man pull his shirt off before he helped divest Cas of his. He found himself fascinated by Castiel’s well defined chest, and he ran his fingers over the smooth skin.
Castiel hummed softly, ducking his head to press a kiss to Dean’s neck. “Lay down on the bed for me, Dean,” he murmured.
Dean shuddered, loving the easy dominance in Castiel’s voice. He kicked off his shoes and socks before climbing onto the bed, laying out on his back. He looked up at Castiel, still standing there. He watched with wide eyes as the man stripped naked, and he couldn’t help but admire his cock, hard and ready. Dean licked his lips as Cas slowly started to crawl onto the bed and up the length of his body.
Dean gasped as Cas trailed kisses from his belly button upward, pausing to flick a tongue over his oh so sensitive nipple. Dean whimpered, hips jerking. His cock was fully hard now and straining to get free from his jeans. Castiel’s mouth continued upward, kissing and sucking a trail up Dean’s neck to his ear. Somehow he managed to hit each of Dean’s most sensitive spots perfectly.
“You should be aware, Dean,” Castiel murmured, voice soft on Dean’s ear. “I know your body better than my own.” He nipped gently at Dean’s earlobe. “I know all of your deepest desires, and every button to push to drive you crazy.”
Dean shuddered with that promise, already knowing it to be true. God he wanted that, wanted it desperately.
Cas pulled back to look at Dean. “Your Castiel won’t know you this well, not yet. You will have to give him time to learn. But tonight I will give you a small preview.” His hand was suddenly gently gripping Dean’s cock through his jeans, stroking slowly.
Dean groaned, thrusting his hips into Castiel’s hand. “Please, Cas. Come on, you’re killing me.”
Castiel just smiled, continuing to tease Dean. “Will you let me have you tonight?”
Dean gasped, Castiel’s words sending a full body shiver through him. “Yes Cas,” he easily agreed. He felt like Cas had him under a spell, he knew just what to say to make him submit.
“Thank you, Dean,” Cas said, pressing a gentle kiss to Dean’s lips.
Dean felt himself relax, all of his worry and stress was slipping away. All he could focus on was Cas. He watched with hooded eyes as Castiel moved lower again, hands easily divulging Dean of his jeans and briefs, leaving him naked.
Then suddenly Castiel’s mouth was on his cock and Dean cried out. His tongue moved up and down his length with practiced ease, and Dean’s head was spinning as he teased him perfectly. He knew exactly where Dean was the most sensitive, knew just how to make Dean squirm and moan.
After a few minutes of teasing Castiel pulled off, moving to kiss Dean again. “No coming yet,” he said, voice thick. “I want you to wait until I’m inside you.” He searched Dean’s face. “Would you like that, Dean?”
Dean felt like he could barely breathe. He still couldn’t believe this was going to happen, but fuck he wanted it. “Yes Cas, please. I need you.”
Castiel was pleased, and he leaned in to kiss Dean again. “Roll over on your stomach, it will be easier that way.”
Dean shook his head. “No, please Cas, I wanna see you.” His hands went to Castiel’s face. “Please.”
Cas nodded. “Okay. It may hurt a little more.”
“I don’t care.” Dean surged up to kiss him again.
Castiel returned the kiss for a moment longer, then pulled away again. “Just lay back and let me take care of you.”
Dean watched as Castiel pulled something from the bedside table, and he realized it was lube. He watched in fascination as Cas slicked his fingers, and the next thing he knew they were pushing between Dean’s legs. He gasped when they found his entrance, teasing it for a moment before gently pushing one finger inside.
Dean actually whimpered as Cas started to work him open, absolutely blown away by the intense feeling of being opened up and lovingly prepared. It was so intimate, and it felt amazing.
Then Castiel’s fingers brushed that special bundle of nerves inside him and Dean cried out as a sharp bolt of pleasure shot through him.
“Oh fuck, Cas!” Dean gasped out, hips jerking, fingers digging into Castiel’s shoulders.
Cas just chuckled and continued to work more fingers inside him, until Dean was nearly begging and Cas was satisfied that he was ready. Dean let out a little whimper as the fingers were pulled free, but the next thing he knew he could feel the thick head of Castiel’s cock brushing against his rim, and without thinking twice he spread his legs further, bringing them up to hook around Castiel’s hips.
Castiel kissed him just as he started to push inside, and his mouth swallowed Dean’s moans.
There was a bit of pain, but it was entirely overwhelmed by pleasure. Dean threw his head back as Cas continued to push into him, slowly working his way inside, inch by inch. He was gasping when Cas was finally there, filling him so wonderfully, and he was still for a long moment, letting Dean adjust.
Finally Dean couldn’t stand it anymore and he started to beg. “Please Cas, I’m good, please move.”
Castiel did as Dean asked, slowly starting to thrust into him. He moved steadily, making sure to push into Dean’s prostate with each pass, sending wonderful pleasure racing through him.
“I love you,” Cas murmured, pressing kisses to Dean’s neck and jaw. His hips continued to move steadily, and he gathered Dean’s legs in his arms, pushing them up further so he could drive in deeper.
Dean let out a deep moan at the new position. “Oh fuck. Love you too, Cas,” he gasped out.
God, this was so much more, so much better, unlike anything Dean ever expected. It was everything.
“Please, Cas,” Dean begged, ready and desperate for more. “Harder, please…”
Cas didn’t hesitate, his hips snapped sharply, increasing the pace of his thrusts. One hand gripped Dean’s shoulder and the other gripped his hip, holding him firmly in place as he fucked him.
“Oh hell, yes,” Dean gasped, arching his back to meet Castiel’s sharp thrusts. He pushed up against the other man’s hands, incredibly aroused by how easily he held him in place.
“You are not going to last much longer,” Castiel murmured, cock driving a little harder. “I can tell.”
Dean whimpered and shook his head. He didn’t want it to be over yet, but he was already so close, simply too overwhelmed to drag it out any longer.
Castiel leaned in and kissed Dean on the lips, then let his mouth trail to Dean’s ear. His hand reached down to grip Dean’s cock, starting to gently stroke it. “Then come for me, Dean.”
Dean cried out as his body immediately obeyed, his orgasm crashing over him as Castiel fucked him through it. The pleasure seemed to last forever as Castiel’s thrusts grew fast and erratic, until finally he too came with a groan and stilled inside Dean.
Dean’s arms were tightly wrapped around Castiel’s shoulders. He was still breathing hard and his body still quivered with fading pleasure. But he didn’t want Cas to go yet, didn’t want to lose his strong weight pressing him into the soft bed.
But after a minute he did finally let Cas pull away, if only to grab a towel to clean them both up. Once that was done Cas came back to his arms. Dean let out a long sigh and pillowed his head to Castiel’s chest.
“I can see why the other me is so possessive of you,” Dean said with a snort.
Castiel laughed softly. “I tried to explain that it’s irrational to be jealous of a different version of himself, but he doesn’t care.”
“Just make sure to change the sheets before he gets home,” Dean said, grinning up at Cas. “They’re going to be a mess.” He craned his head up to press a lingering kiss to Castiel’s lips.
“I imagine they will be,” Castiel said, raising an eyebrow at Dean. “It’s only four o’clock, and Dean said we have most of the night.”
Dean’s heart jumped, excited to get to spend more time exploring with Cas. “Great. Let’s make the best of it.”
It was early in the morning when they were woken to the feeling of the bed dipping. This time Cas was there to stop Dean from going for the gun.
“It’s Gabriel,” Cas muttered, still half asleep even as he held Dean firmly, not letting him quite reach the gun.
“Heya Dean-o!”
Dean groaned, collapsing back onto Castiel’s chest. “Right.” He shifted so he could look up at the man standing on his bed without fully untangling himself from Cas. “I guess it’s time to go home now, isn’t it?”
“Yep.” Gabriel was grinning, looking quite pleased. “You did good, kid. Although this is so much more than I expected,” he said, waving a hand at their naked bodies tangled in the sheets. “A simple love confession would have sufficed.”
Dean rolled his eyes. “Then why didn’t you send me home this afternoon?”
Gabriel shrugged his shoulders. “You were having so much fun. And besides, now I know for sure you won’t mess things up with your Cas back home.” He waved his hand. “Say your goodbyes, it’s time to hit the road.”
Dean’s heart clenched suddenly, and he looked up at Cas. He could see the same bittersweet emotion in his eyes. “I guess it’s not really goodbye, right?” Dean said. “I’ll see you soon, and you’ll see me as soon as I get home from that hunt.”
Castiel nodded. “Right. Not goodbye at all.” He cupped Dean’s face in his hand, running his thumb over his cheekbone. “I love you.”
Dean smiled and leaned into the touch. “I love you, too.”
They came together for one last lingering kiss, sharing a long look when they pulled apart.
Dean finally turned back to Gabriel. “Ok. Take me home.”
Gabriel snapped his fingers, and in a flash Dean was alone in his bed again. Gabriel and Cas were gone, as was every sign he’d ever shared his room with another person. He looked down at his body and saw he was back in the t-shirt and briefs he’d been in when he’d left. He reached over to check his phone and saw he hadn’t lost any time, it was still the same date. So likely nobody knew he’d been gone.
Dean realized that after all that, he could still just stay in bed, never tell anyone what happened. If he didn’t confess his love to Cas, then nothing would change, they would just continue on as best friends. It was certainly the easier road, far easier than coming out to everyone.
But then he’d miss out on everything he’d experienced over the last several days. Just the thought of never kissing Cas again made his stomach twist into knots. He couldn’t let that happen, now that he knew what he could have, he’d never be able to live without it.
Dean sat up in bed, suddenly needing to go to Cas. He needed to see his Cas, to make sure he was still there, waiting for him. He quickly pulled on a pair of jeans and left his room, crossing the hall and bursting into Castiel’s room without knocking.
Cas was there, awake and sitting up in his bed. He was reading a book, wearing his standard suit and trench coat. He looked up at Dean in surprise, brows furrowing. “Dean? What’s wrong?”
Dean stood there frozen for a moment, then suddenly lunged forward, climbing into the bed and straddling Castiel’s lap. He took the other man’s face in his hands and kissed him firmly, grinning into the kiss when he felt Cas immediately start to kiss him back, strong arms coming up to circle his waist.
Dean finally pulled away, looking into Castiel’s shocked face, full of so much hope that it hurt. He grinned. “I love you, Cas.”
Castiel’s breath caught, and it took him a moment to find his words. “I love you too, Dean,” he managed, voice thick and rough.
Dean let his forehead rest against Castiel’s. “I promise I’ll explain everything in the morning. But for now, will you just lay with me while I sleep? I need you here with me.”
“Anything for you, Dean,” Castiel said, his hand coming up to cup Dean’s jaw.
Dean’s heart soared at the familiar touch.
Three years later...
“He’d better be gone,” Dean grumbled, throwing open the bunker door and stomping down the steps. The hunt was done and handled, and all Dean wanted was to go to sleep in his own bed, with his own angel.
“You know it’s irrational to be jealous of a past version of yourself, Dean,” Sam said, rolling his eyes as he followed him down the stairs.
“Cas said that too, don’t care,” Dean snapped.
It wasn’t just the sharing. It was facing the version of himself who had denied his love for Castiel for so long. Had almost been too scared to ever let it happen. He’d been terrified that somehow his past self would fuck it up, take it all away from him.
His hand went to his chest, double checking that the vile with Castiel’s grace was still where it belonged. He always feared losing it on a hunt, but this week he’d feared losing it for a different reason. But it was still there, where it belonged. Dean sighed. “I just want life to go back to normal.”
“Okay, okay,” Sam said. “I’m sure he’s gone, just like you said he would be. I’m going to bed.” He turned the corner heading for his room.
Dean marched down the hall and threw open his bedroom door. He was incredibly relieved to see Cas there, sleeping in bed, alone.
He also noticed he’d showered and changed the sheets, just like he’d suggested he should three years ago, when he’d been the one in that bed. That made Dean smile. Castiel always cared so much about making him happy.
Dean quietly stripped down to just his t-shirt and briefs before climbing into bed. He slipped under the covers and snuggled up to Castiel’s chest, sighing softly when the other man’s arms automatically wrapped around him.
“Welcome home,” Castiel murmured, still half asleep, his hand rubbing Dean’s back. “You and Sam both okay?”
“Not a scratch,” Dean said, pleased that Cas always checked on Sam too. “And the vamp hybrids are no more.”
“Good, then I hope we can take a couple of days off,” Castiel said, kissing Dean’s forehead. “I’ve missed you.”
“I’ve missed you, too,” Dean said. “I hated sharing you with him.”
Castiel chuckled. “Yes, I know. But he’s gone now, it’s just us.”
“Good.” Dean smiled, already feeling his irritation fading away now that he didn’t have to deal with his past self anymore. “Okay, I’ve been driving all night, and I know you haven’t gotten much sleep at all, if I can recall,” he said, propping his head up on Castiel’s chest and giving him a cheeky grin. “So let’s get some sleep, we can make up for lost time in the morning.” He waggled his eyebrows. “I know you need a break anyway, past me wore you out.”
Castiel laughed. “Yes, yes you did.”
Dean leaned down to press a soft kiss to Castiel’s lips, then settled back into his arms, pillowing his head on the other man’s shoulder. He let out a long, content sigh. “Love you, Cas.”
“I love you too, Dean.”