Chapter Text
The wolf watches as the small hunched figure creeps into the cave. Gaunt, thin, and with only one arm, she struggles with her self appointed task. One wall of the cave is open to the sky, letting in enough light, for a stunningly beautiful rose bush to flourish, blooms dripping from its branches, thorns dagger length and sharp.
“Hey baby girl,” The woman croons seemingly to the bush. “Mummy’s home, and she’s never going to leave you again.” She falls to her knees, and with her right hand, winds a leather thong through the branches closest to her. From the thong dangles part of a jaw bone. The jaw bone of a wolf.
Bumping along on her belly, the woman slithers as far into the bush as she can. Thorns and branches catch and tear at her, she seems oblivious to it all. Finally she stops. A vial of liquid appears in her hand. Pulling the cork out with her teeth, she swallows the contents.
The poison is extremely potent. Blood begins to gush from her ears, nose, mouth, and eyes. Though it is hidden from sight, blood runs from every orifice she has. The wolf watches as she dies a painfully bloody death.
He’s watched this memory more times than he has bothered to count.
Blinking awake, Pride stretches out his body, and sits up in the same grotto. The rose bush has long since died, the centuries taking their toll on the living gravestone of his Heart and unborn daughter. Instead a stone rose bush has replaced it, their three names carved into the base.
“My Lord,” A somewhat sardonic voice calls out to him.
He doesn’t bother to move, “Yes Sorrow?” This is the last time he’ll get to see this particular memory. After his actions today, it will no longer exist, because it will never happen.
“We have run out of time. They are here,” Is the only warning he gets before the boom of thunder shakes the cave. They will have brought all their power to bear, and it will not be enough to stop him.
“So I see,” Pride gets to his feet. Pulling a dagger from his belt he starts to walk towards the gravestone.
“My Lord?” Sorrow calls to him. “Good luck my lord. I pray you are able to make sure this future never comes to pass.”
Resting against the gravestone Pride nods, “I will, my friend, I will.” And then he draws the blade across his own throat, even as Sorrow, and a hundred others do the same. Sharp pain blinds him for a second, until he grabs the power locked in his own blood, and that of the Elvhen dying around him, using it to activate the spell they’ve been weaving into the very stones surrounding this cave for the last century. Magic flares around him and, if he could, he’d laugh as the very fabric of time itself is rent apart, throwing him backwards to a fixed unchangeable point.
His studies pay off as he is able to push beyond the fixed point. Not by much. Not a lot. Just enough.
Attempting to gasp in shock he stares up at the sky as fluffy white clouds scud across it innocently. Their combined power still sings in his veins. A thought and his throat is healed. Taking a deep breath he fills his lungs. Pressing against his senses, dulling his perceptions, is the Veil. A flimsy, worn Veil, but still his Veil. They have succeeded. He has another chance. He intends to use it wisely.
It is time to hunt down his Heart and make her his. The future he has lived through will never come to pass. She will make sure of it.
oOo
Fur in my face. Groaning I push at Baron, “Ah, come on baby boy. Can’t you give mummy a few more minutes of sleep?” A rough tongue on my cheek is his only answer. Grunting at him I blearily force one eye open. My beautiful little kitten is sitting on the pillow next to mine. His battle-scarred face pulled into a perpetual frown, one ear torn to almost nothing, a huge bruiser of a cat, and he’s my perfect sweetie. “Okay baby boy, mummy is getting up, just to feed you.” I get another head-butt from him and can’t keep the soft laughter inside. To think this cat, with all he’s been through, is so loving, and adorkable, I’m blessed to have been adopted by him.
Rubbing his ears, I distract him so I can get carefully out of bed. Today must be a good day, my body doesn’t even ache. Baron submits to letting me pick him up in my arms. And then, like the royal personage he is, lets me carry him down the stairs to the kitchen of my small flat. All the way I pepper his head with little kisses, and tell him what a wonderful baby boy he is to his mummy. I’m such a damn soft touch. Built so big he literally fills up my arms, I murmur to him, “Who is mummy’s extra special boy, hmm? That would be you. Baron is the best baby boy in the whole world. Mummy loves you so much.” Honestly I can’t believe how lucky I am.
What were the chances of ever meeting him? I got guilt tripped into helping someone deliver donations to an animal shelter. And there he was. Battered and broken by life, so like me, so standoffish, so ready to believe the world will always hurt him. And now look at him. Cuddling him close, I lay my head atop his, and bask in the soft purrs emanating from him. “Baron, my sweet Baron. You are mummy’s best baby boy. God, I’m so lucky to have found you.” People say cats are incapable of giving you love, they’ve never met Baron, they’ll never know how loving he is.
Lost in our hugging, I startle when someone clears their throat. A melodious, and very masculine, voice breaks into our moment, “Vhenan, from the memories you left me, you spoke warmly of your cat. I have never had the pleasure of witnessing it, before now.”
No one should be in my flat. And his voice is extremely familiar. Jumping in surprise, I look up, to see a fictional character standing in the doorway to my living room. Solas, Fen’Harel himself, is leaning against the door jam. In game he wears horrible clothes most of the time. Right now, he’s wearing skinny jeans, in grey, converse, and a t-shirt I’ve always wanted, in blue, with the words ‘Fade Nerd on the Streets, Dread Wolf in the Sheets’, and an amazing silhouette picture of an elf reading a book, whose shadow stretches out into a six eyed wolf’s.
I can’t hear the kitchen clock ticking. Baron died fifteen years ago. I never have days without pain anymore. I lost my flat and had to go into assisted accommodation. “I’m dreaming, aren’t I?” It’s the only logical explanation, as I hug my cat closer to me.
“You are,” Solas nods. “Though I fear you must wake up now ma’lath.” Oh wow. His voice is indescribable. I’ve never been one for Solasmance, I preferred Cullen out of all the men, and Josephine of the women. I may have dabbled in a bit of Dorian, or Bull, and uh, that sounded pretty dirty. Stupid brain. But, I only ever romanced Solas once. Never again. The power imbalance repulsed me. The way I had to chase him. His own attitudes to Thedas and its peoples. No, I only romanced him for the achievement, and the fact I’m a completionist.
“I wonder why I’m dreaming of you?” Why am I asking a figment of my imagination? Though I think my imagination needs a pay rise, this is some seriously good shit. “I haven’t played Inquisition for years.” Maybe this is a prod to replay it?
Snorting he shakes his head, pushes off the wooden door jam, and saunters towards me. “I am truly sorry my love. You are no longer in your world. You are in mine. And while I have managed to steer events, however slightly, I could not pull you from the Fade. You had to step physically out yourself. I also could not save you from my Mark. You will have to bear the weight of it upon your shoulders.”
As he reaches me, he lifts a hand to cup the side of my face. His hand is warm, those fingers of his long, and oh so gentle. In real life I hate being touched. It revolts me to my stomach. But this is a dream, it’s not real, and I still stiffen at being touched. “Forgive me my Heart,” His voice throbs. If he wasn’t such a complete racist dick, I’d romance him more, just for this voice, it’s so expressive. The voice acting on Inquisition is amazing. “I did not listen to you. I should have.” Grey eyes with a hint of blue gaze down into mine. He’s taller than me. Freckles stand out starkly against his skin.
“Er,” Is my intelligent reply. I’m sure this isn’t in the game. I can only wonder at the route my subconscious is taking me down.
Those lips of his quirk at the edges, “I hope you like the body I have crafted for you. I took a few liberties, but kept it within the range of DNA I chose.” DNA? How would Solas know about DNA? “As Leliana will dig into everyone’s pasts, I have found someone who existed in Thedas, but who died. I believe borrowing the identity of the dead will give you a reasonable chance to stay safe from her scrutiny.”
He’s still cupping my cheek, but now he’s leaning down. When he rests his forehead to mine, he takes this big breath and then releases it in a rush. His breath caresses my face. His eyes stare into mine. Seriously. What. The. Fuck? Why is my mind doing this to me?
“Beloved. Please, I am fully aware of your knowledge of me. I know you have no reason to trust me. But, my love, you must trust me. Now, more than ever.” Oh god, his eyes are doing the thing, where they go all emotional, his voice vibrating with emotion. “Please. MJ.” How the fuck does he know my real name? “Come with me if you want to live.”
Blinking in shock at him, forgetting for a moment this is just a dream, I blurt out, “Did you just quote Terminator to me?”
Stepping closer, his body presses against my arms, where I’m clutching Baron to me. Stupid cat is still purring. “Oh Vhenan, the things you have told me of your world. I believe this greeting is the only one to convince you this is all real.” His head moves so our noses are touching as well. “I have spoken to Love, it has agreed to be your Spirit Guide. It will help you, until you learn more of this world. Including how to use your magic safely.”
“Magic?” I interrupt whatever he was going to say next.
Chuckling he nods, which is weird, as it makes our noses bump a few times, “Yes my heart, you have magic. I have augmented it with my own. And now you must wake up.” Both hands cup my face and he repeats, “Wake up!”
oOo
Blinking awake, I stare up at a stone ceiling, one that wasn’t in my bedroom, or in any hospital I’ve ever been in.
“Hello,” A feminine voice says. And I can’t hear it in my ears. I can hear it in my head. “Yes, I am inside you. Though not possessing you.” Huh? “I am your Spirit Guide. I am Love.”
Huh?
A loud crackling noise booms near me, and white-hot agony rips through me from my left hand. Curling my body around it, I’m barely aware I’m screaming, too busy with the distracting pain to really notice. When the pain leaves me, I pant trying to get my breath back.
Since my teens I’ve been in constant pain. It’s only gotten worse with age. I have a fairly high pain tolerance. Nothing in my life has prepared me for this.
In the distance I can hear running footsteps. Lifting up my left hand, which is now pleasantly numb, I can see a bright green glowing gash in the middle of it.
WTF?
Am I still dreaming? Why would I dream of this? I don’t want to dream of this. I want to dream of Baron again.
“You are not dreaming. This is very real. Welcome to Thedas MJ,” The voice in my head says. Oh god, please let this be a dream. Please let me wake up.