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Kim Namjoon is not stupid. It's a well known fact that he has an IQ of 148. Yet people, including his bandmates, can't understand how he doesn't know how to cook.
See it's not that he doesn't know how; he'd just prefer not to. He can do basic tasks like boiling water or chopping vegetables or even making decent spaghetti. So why is it that everyone who knows of him thinks he can't step foot in a kitchen without blowing it up?
It started pre debut. There was only him, Yoongi, and Hoseok living in the dorms. They didn't know each other that well so they all tended to stay in their own corners. However after he came back from late nights in the studio he'd notice plates of food left in the microwave. Knowing that Yoongi was still in the studio when he left Namjoon assumed it was Hoseok who was cooking the food.
A few weeks had passed and a vocalist, older than all of them, had joined. He was incredibly quiet and the only time Namjoon had heard him speak was in a meeting with Bang PD and other staff. As a welcome to the new member and as a thank you to Hoseok, Namjoon woke up early to make them all breakfast. Now what needs to be remembered is that at this time they were broke. All of the supplies in the kitchen were purchased second hand at the thrift store a few blocks from the dorm. So it wasn't really his fault when he picked up the pan to dump the eggs on the plate and the handle of the pan separated from the pan itself.
He had stood there for a few seconds just staring at the eggs on the floor. From behind him he heard a snort and he quickly turned around, still holding the handle, to see Seokjin, Yoongi, and Hoseok staring at him. Yoongi and Hoseok looked like they were going to die from holding in their laughter while Seokjin looked at him in disbelief.
Namjoon felt his face turn red while he tried to stutter out an excuse but before he could get anything out Seokjin held up his hand to stop him.
"I think it's best if you leave the cooking to us ok Namjoon?" Seokjin said, his amusement clear in his voice.
A few months passed and as more members joined. The story of Namjoon's pan disaster was used as an icebreaker. Eventually they were seven and Namjoon felt complete. He felt good. These six boys would end up being his everything but he didn't know it yet.
Some might see this situation as an unfortunate coincidence, but -as stated before- Kim Namjoon wasn't stupid. He saw how the members wouldn't let him in the kitchen. Even when they made a schedule of who would cook and clean up, Namjoon's name wasn't on the list. When he did get in the kitchen, he'd make a show of not being able to do something.
"Hyung," he'd mumble "how do I put the ramen in? Should I break it up first?"
And Yoongi would just shake his head and push him into the living room freeing Namjoon of any chores that night.
And when they went on a variety show and he was asked to cut up some vegetables, could he really be blamed if he pretended he didn't know what to do so that Jin would wrap his arms around him to show him? No he didn't think there was anything wrong with that.
As the group's music developed so did their relationship. They never explored each other much when they were living in the one bedroom. Not with Jungkook who was still was too young at the time and so much pressure on them to be perfect. When Jungkook started to mature so did his feelings for the others. Really Jungkook was the one who sat all his hyungs down and stated he was in love with all of them equally.
When Namjoon sat back to think about it, he realized that he too was in love with all of them. He loves his Seokjin whose shy demeanor melted away to reveal a bright and young soul who loved to care for his boys. He loves his Yoongi who hadn't always wanted to be close but eventually realized they were in this for the long haul and showed his need for affection whenever he wanted. He loves his Hoseok who had always been his right hand and was there to brighten up their days. He loves his Jimin who was always more than willing to show his love and respect for his members even if he didn't always love himself. He loves his Taehyung who would stay up and indulge him in his conversation about life and purpose even throwing in his own thoughts in between Namjoon's rants. He loves his Jungkook who brought them all together and showed his love through small, almost hidden, gestures. He loves his boys and they love him, as they liked to remind him.
So of course as their relationship became romantic Namjoon started to feel a little guilty for not helping out much. He tried to get involved but he'd always be pulled away.
Sometimes it was Jimin and Taehyung each putting a hand on his thigh and whispering
"Hyung... forget the kitchen there are things more important right next to you."
Other times it was Jungkook wanting to show him how his new game worked.
"Hyung sit let me show you this!" He'd say excitedly while pushing Namjoon on the couch and sitting on his lap so that Namjoon couldn't move.
Or it would even be Yoongi yelling from the next room
"JOONIE COME HERE RIGHT NOW!"
And Namjoon would run to him just to see Yoongi laying on the couch dramatically holding out his hand.
"Yes hyung what do you need" he'd ask.
"What do I need? What do I need? Look at me. What's wrong with this situation huh? "
Namjoon of knew what he wanted but he'd take a few seconds to think so that Yoongi would look at him. When he did Namjoon would sit on the floor in front of Yoongi and interlace their fingers. He'd sit like that for hours dozing off with Yoongi.
Or sometimes he'd make it all the way into the kitchen just to have Hoseok or Seokjin sit him on a stool and give him kisses in between their work.
"Hyuuuuung" he'd whine. "Let me help" Seokjin would smile and kiss Namjoon on the nose.
"Joooooon" Jin would respond "sit there and be our taster and you'd be helping enough"
"Yeah" *kiss* "let" *kiss* "us" *kiss* "pamper" *kiss* "you. " Hoseok would throw in, kissing him on a new spot between each word.
Eventually Namjoon learned to accept defeat. After all, the alternatives to helping weren't that bad. Especially when everyone decided to say fuck the kitchen and order take out while they all cuddled on blankets.
And if when Namjoon fell asleep they all stared at his beautiful face, no one needed to know.