Chapter Text
“Wait for me here this won’t take long.”
“Won’t take long my ass,” you huffed, throwing another rock off the pier. Your brother promised he’d have you home in time to catch your show, but he made about as good on that promise as any other one. He was always dragging you along to his strange meetings, something about not wanting you to be home alone at night and people having it out for him. Whatever that meant. He was always overprotective, but ever since he became number 2 he’d been downright paranoid.
It was only a matter of time before he’d come out of the warehouse you were banned from entering acting as if he didn’t leave you waiting for over an hour. You threw another rock into the murky water as if it would make your brother come out faster. Maybe you’d get lucky and he’d make it up to you by buying fast food for dinner, and maybe he would actually eat with you for once. No, that would just be wishful thinking.
Hawks was never hungry after these meetings.
With your phone in hand your finger hovered over the call button with every intention of blowing up his phone again. He wasn’t going to answer, he never did. You stared idly at his contact picture. It was of you and him smiling in front of the same bay you were taking your aggression out on. The only difference was that it was taken from the otherside of the pier, the side that wasn’t crawling with gross men and people’s garbage. You don’t remember when you took it or if you were even the one who took it, but there was a couple things that dated it. Like the lack of hair on his chin and the horrible bangs you would never rock again. Oh, and the genuine smile on his face. Been awhile since you last saw that.
You tucked the phone back into your pocket and stood up to chuck the last of your rocks as far as you could. Your shoulder wound back, your muscles tensed, but your fingers didn’t let go of the rock. Something told you it wasn’t worth it—taking your anger out on things that aren’t the reason for your anger; Hawks told you it wasn’t worth it. He said that a long time ago though. Before he was even in the top ten, before the picture, before...yeah.
You’d give him five mississippi's before you marched in there and pulled him out by his wings. Ten mississippi’s. Twenty.
Who were you kidding?
It didn’t matter how many times you counted or how many times you tried to pinch yourself into action, your feet would not move towards the warehouse. Ignorance is bliss you’d tell yourself, you were at peace with not knowing what your brother was up to in such a shady place. He’d be out soon with that fake smile and he’d tell you the same shitty joke about him working for villains like he always did. You didn’t have to go in there. You didn’t want to go in there. But if all of that was true why were you walking towards the warehouse like you were going to go in there? And why were you pushing open the rusted metal doors just like you watched your brother do time and time again?
“Hawks?”
You could see him on the ground surrounded by two men with cold hearts and bad intentions. No one acknowledged your presence, not even Hawks. They must not of heard you over the insults they were cutting down your brother with. There was a man standing overtop of him, dirty boots pressing his beautiful feathers into his back. But worst of all, he was just laying there, taking it.
It didn’t make any sense. He had been here for over an hour surely you would have heard him shouting if he had been ambushed. You snuck behind some nearby crates to get a closer look. He had most of his feathers, he could easily overpower them, but he wasn’t. It was unbearable to watch; why did he always let people walk all over him?
Hawks told you it wasn’t worth it—taking your anger out on things that aren’t the reason for your anger—but he never told you what to do when the reason was right in front of you. So you stood for a moment and let your emotions do the thinking for you. That was the first of many mistakes you would make as you involved yourself in something much larger than yourself. Your shoulder wound back, your muscles tensed, and your fingers let go of the rock.
“Leave him alone!”
Your voice carried neither courage nor confidence. It was shaky and whiny, like a child asking the local bullies to leave their favorite stuffed animal alone. Every head in the room snapped in your direction including the head the rock had hit. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t consider running. Adrenaline was coursing through your veins and yet you were paralyzed, unable to move a single muscle even as you were being rushed by an outstretched hand that reeked of death.
Hawks was always fast. You would race to the pier as kids and whoever got there first would get to pull up the minnow trap that didn’t belong to either of you. You never won a single race, but you did get to pull up the minnow trap every single time. Hawks was a selfless brother and fast. Very, very fast.
“Shigaraki stop!”
The familiar tug of his feathers had pulled you out of harm's way before you could blink. He was still on the ground with even less feathers. You didn’t know he was capable of sounding so serious. Neither did Shigaraki, or so it seemed, as he stopped dead in his tracks.
“You don’t really expect me to buy that crap about you just ‘playing the part of a hero’ after that, do you?”
“This is different, that’s my-”
“That’s my brother and you fucks had better leave him alone or i’ll-”
Do absolutely nothing. What could you do? You didn’t have a quirk or anymore rocks for that matter. You’d seen the kinda damage these people were capable of. Especially the one that was stepping all over Hawks. Dabi, that man had almost killed your brother and the number one hero once before.
“You better tell them to run along back to the nest Hawks. You wouldn’t want something bad to happen to them would you?”
There was devious intent in his voice and somehow you knew better than to look in his direction. You were still focused on Shigaraki, and more importantly where his hands were. You had seen the news report on what he had done to that police officer and that Yakuza guy. The feathers continued to try and pull you further away, but you were too rigid from trying to stand your ground.
“I told you to stay outside and wait for me, you need to leave now!”
“Not without you!”
You could hear Hawks grunt as Dabi stepped off of him and started walking in your direction. Like the protective older brother he was, he too tried to make his way over to you only to be stopped dead in his tracks with the threat of being burned to a crisp.
“On second thought, why not let them stay? This ought to be fun.”
Some people are a lot stronger than they look. Whenever you would harp on Hawks for being so tiny compared to the rest of the pros he’d always say that. And when you tried to shoulder past Shigaraki to make a beeline for the door you realized how right he was. With just a four finger grip on your wrist you and a hand around your neck Shigaraki was able to stop any resistance you had left.
“Just let them go, they don’t even know what’s going on.”
He was good at hiding his emotions and for the longest time you didn’t even realize he had a tell. His feathers were shaking, even the ones attempting to pull you out of Shigaraki’s hold. His calmness was fake, he was scared, and you were suffocating in an emotion you hadn’t felt in so long.
“That true?” Dabi asked, grabbing your jaw and shaking your head, “did your dear older brother not tell you the good news?”
“What are you talking about? Get your hands off me!”
“Go ahead and tell them the same thing you told us, Hawks. Like how everything you do is for the league and that you’re the one behind the nomus attacking pro heroes.”
It couldn’t have been true, you didn’t want it to be true. Your brother was always a hero in your eyes and he always would be. Hawks said nothing but you refused to take his silence as an admission of guilt. He was being extorted or threatened or-or something.
“You’re lying! My brother would never hurt anybody it isn’t in our blood .”
“Are you sure about that?” Shigaraki’s voice cut in from behind you, “Because that stunt you pulled earlier begs to differ. Had you of thrown that rock any harder and you could have seriously hurt Dabi maybe even killed him. Doesn’t seem very “heroic” to me.”
His grip tightened around your neck. They were both laughing at you now, taking great pleasure in the way you flinched away from their touch. Dabi was blocking your view of Hawks and when Shigaraki’s rough lips ghosted over the shell of your ear you were grateful your brother couldn’t see the fear wash over your face.
“You know what I think? I think a rude little brat like you needs to be taught some manners.”
Dabi looked to the man behind you with an incredulous look on his face but as time went on the corners of his mouth twitched into an uncanny smile. He stepped back giving you a full view of Hawks, just standing there face full of despair and feathers shaking.
“Why don’t you wait outside?” Shigaraki asked. It wasn’t really a question but it was posed as one.
“Shigaraki please-” Hawks was bargaining when he should just be accepting like you had already begun to.
“Don’t make him ask again.”
Hawks dared to get closer walking with his hands up defensively. You hated seeing him so vulnerable and although you didn’t want to be left alone you hoped he would just listen and stop prolonging the inevitable.
“They’re stubborn and reckless and I take full responsibility for that. So...do what you have to do to me not them because it’s my fault they’re like this.”
It wasn’t true. He wasn’t the reason for your anger. It was society that had made you the way you were, not him. Even now he was taking responsibility for something he had no control over just like heroes were forced to do every single day.
“Touching. But you should save your theatrics for someone who cares.”
Shigaraki was having none of it and neither were you.
“I want to go home, Hawks. So just leave before you make them mad. I- i’ll be alright.”
As siblings who only had each other you were as thick as thieves. Hawks knew when you were sad or angry, but he also knew when you were lying.
“Shigaraki, if you hurt them...the deal is off.”
With a nod he walked towards the door and as it closed you sighed in relief despite being completely unrelieved.
He knows when you’re lying. You said you’d be alright. He knew you’d be alright. Everything was going to be alright.
“Must be hard being the little sibling of the number 2 hero huh? Reaping the benefits of of being pro hero without doing any of the work sounds tough,” Shigaraki was the first to break the ice. The hand holding your wrist let go and rubbed up the length of your arm. His hands were cold much like his disposition.
“You don’t know me. The only benefit is money and it isn’t a fair trade for what I have to go through.”
You didn’t know why you were airing your grievances. It’s not like they cared, they were just trying to scare you. These people were backwards. Stuck in their ways in which good meant bad and bad meant ideal. Dabi eyed you curiously before pressing furthur, “Sounds familiar. If you weren’t so much like that traitor hero i’d say you remind me of myself.”
Your stomach churned. The fact that he could see part of himself in you was worse than any other insult.
“The family resemblance is striking. So tell me. Do you have any wings of your own little birdy?” You shivered as Shigaraki’s bony finger trailed up your spine. Every Time you squirmed his fifth finger threatened to press into your neck forcing you to stay perfectly still.
“N-no.”
“Something tells me you’re lying.”
“I’m not!” You were becoming desperate as his hand trailed under your shirt. Dabi stared intently at your face, you could easily see his anticipation building for the inevitable.
“I don’t think I can take your word for it i’ll just have to see for myself.”
Shigaraki gripped everything and anything in the way of a full view of your back. Your clothes cracked and unraveled leaving nothing, but a small layer of dust. Dabi whistled as you covered your chest from his view. The horrible feeling of being exposed was at the very least diminished by Shigaraki’s hand finally leaving your neck. With two hands on your shoulders he leaned you forward, turning you to side to side like he was examining a small doll.
“Hmm nothing there, maybe you aren’t like your brother after all. Take a look.”
Shigaraki turned your back to Dabi and soon his hands were on you too. You could feel him heating them up as they trailed up and down your sides.
“Don’t touch me.”
“You’re in no position to be making demands,” Dabi said, pressing against you and pinning you to Shigaraki’s chest, “next time you think about sticking your nose where it doesn’t belong you better have a plan.”
Their touch was gentle and curious like they were testing to see how much you could take before you broke down. Shigaraki tried to coax your arms away from your chest but you refused to let go.
“What do you want from me?” you asked, trying to ignore their sickeningly sweet ministrations.
“From you? Nothing. We just want to give you a lesson before you go back to your perfect house in your perfect town in your perfect hero world,” Shigaraki was practically wheezing with excitement when he finally got your arms to fall to your sides, “we’ll start small, I think you owe Dabi here an apology for hitting him.”
“Sorry.”
“That didn’t sound very sincere to me, what do you think?” He took a step back to get a better view of you. His exposed eye wasn’t focused on your face anymore.
“I think a lesson in respect would go a long way for them.” Dabi’s wandering hands finally stilled at your chest causing you to sputter out an apology.
“I’m sorry for hitting you!”
“Was that so hard? I think you’re starting to get it now. If you just do what we tell you this will be easier for all of us.”
Shigaraki almost sounded generous. He talked as if it was something he had to do, but a glance down would show you that it wasn’t like that at all. He wanted to do it.
“Now what was that thing you called us earlier. Oh that’s right you called us fucks didn’t you?“
“I don’t remember.”
“You don’t remember why am I not surprised!”
“Well let me rejog your memory for you. You came in here with a shitty attitude and no plan making demands like the spoiled hero brat you are. But hey that’s fine! This is a learning experience after all, and I know you won’t make the same mistake again.”
Shigaraki removed the hand from his face and placed it into his pocket. You didn’t expect him to look...normal you decided on even though your mind had suggested something more shameful than “normal.” He cupped your face in his hands with practiced carefulness, forcing you to look him dead in his eyes that were fixed on your lips.
“What’s my name again?”
“Shigaraki,” you said, defeatedly.
Shigaraki’s tongue darted out of his mouth to wet his lips as he closed the distance between you and him. Your eyes were shut tightly, you couldn’t see him kissing you but you could feel it. All your senses were heightened as his rough lips pressed against yours. Shigaraki replaced Dabi’s hands with his own, feeling you up while his tongue pressed into your mouth.
A sound escaped you when he bit down on your bottom lip. It wasn’t a sound of pain. He pulled back just as surprised as you were. A low chuckle came from behind you and Dabi started petting your head like you were some kind of animal.
“Well...that was unexpected. All that from a kiss? When’s the last time big brother loosened the leash enough for you to get some action?”
Never.
You didn’t say anything you were too focused on the pooling warmth in your gut that betrayed you. Your mind and body were not in agreement, and shock was their mediator. Your body said yes, your mind said no, but you said nothing.
Dabi leaned down and kissed your neck forcing another lewd sound to leave your lips.
“Must’ve been awhile if that sound is anything to go by,” Shigaraki mused before taking the other side of your neck for himself, “you look a little out of it there I think it’s time to bring you back down to Earth.”
Your eyes were starting to roll and flutter as they kissed, sucked, and bit at your previously untouched skin. It was all too much, the heat from Dabi, Shigaraki’s hands teasing your body with slowly paced strokes, both of their mouths marking up your neck and shoulders. You were willingly arching into them letting them take what they wanted from you. You couldn’t understand why. Why were you letting them touch you? Why were you enjoying it? Why did you want more?
Why? Why? Why?
The hands that hung slack at your sides found their way into Shigaraki’s soft hair and you whispered something to him that you would take to your grave. He laughed quietly into your shoulder before pulling away completely, leaving you with nothing but the feeling of shame and a new understanding of yourself.
“I think they learned their lesson. Let them go.”
You returned to Hawks with someone else’s coat around your shoulders, marks on your body, and shame written all over your face. He didn’t ask what happened and even if he did you wouldn’t have told him. All he did was apologize the whole way home, excessively asking if you needed anything or if their was anything he could say to make you feel better. He wanted to explain himself, but you had learned your lesson. Ignorance really was bliss, and you should have just minded your business. You had learned something new about your brother and in turn you had learned something new about yourself. It was a strange and uncomfortable night and after a while both of you decided to stop trying to make sense of it all.
Hawks was always so attentive he really was the best older brother who just wanted what was best for you. So how could you tell him that you were willing to let villains have their way with you? You couldn’t. Instead you told him everything was fine and let him take you out for dinner like nothing had changed. Like you hadn’t changed.
Neither of you ate that night.