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He built her a suit.
Pepper didn’t find it until later ( too late ), in his lab behind a pane of glass. It was rose and silver to his red and gold, a soft complement to Iron Man’s boldness. The suit was all sleek lines, all curves and arches instead of harsh blocks. It looked like a work of art, almost too beautiful for its purpose. In flight, she knew, it would only be more so.
( She imagined them in the skies together, flying free. She would temper him, like always, and he would bring her higher. A matched set, they were, their edges fitting like jigsaw pieces in the endless blue. )
There was a note, taped to the glass in his distinctive handwriting ( blocky, messy, more of a doctor’s than an engineer’s. Reading his paperwork was an exercise in futility ). She ripped it off with the desperation of the starving, wanting something more of Tony, even if it was just ink on a page.
There was only one line.
For when I need a Rescue .
Tony hadn’t come back from wherever he had gone ( yet. She knew he was coming back. He had to be ). He had disappeared in that stupid spaceship and been swallowed up by the sky. But he always came back, she knew. Even if it took months, he always came back. She couldn’t give up hope.
A small, insidious part of her mind reminded her that he could be dust like so many others. Dust couldn’t fly a spaceship or pilot the armor. Dust couldn't come home to her. She had to hope that he wasn’t, because she didn’t know what she would do if he was.
( She had thought herself lucky, at first, to be alive. Half of the people in the Tower’s lobby had disappeared into dust, but not her. She didn’t think she was lucky anymore. )
The glass opened like magic ( or, like it was controlled by a grieving AI ). There was no dramatic sound, no confetti or glitter or Tony . Pepper half expected him to pop out from behind a table, grinning like a maniac. She wanted him to be there, to rest his chin on her shoulder and tell her about the suit in his rambling tones that she loved so much.
His ghost flitted around the lab, but stayed far away from her and her wordless grief. Tears were streaming down her cheeks, but she ignored them. One shaking hand reached out to touch the metal of the suit. It was warmer than she expected it to be. Her fingerprints smudged on the rose gold paint, on the glow of the reactor, leaving marks that proved she was there.
Pepper couldn’t help but to note the differences between it and Tony’s (she hesitated to call it hers , not when Tony wasn’t there to give it to her). It was slimmer, clearly shaped for her. She didn’t doubt that it was deadly, but it looked less imposing than Iron Man. The reactor in its chest glowed the same blue, but softer, somehow. The faceplate, normally so angry, looked at peace. The suit looked like a savior, like an angel from on high cast in pinks and golds.
She could already tell that it would be fast, strong, perfect . It was for rescue, not war, and it showed.
Pepper burst into tears. They weren’t pretty tears, restrained or delicate; they were full on sobs, wracking her whole body and bringing her to her knees. They were a culmination of years of feelings, of love and missed chances and pain . She laid on the stainless floor in front of the suit ( standing tall and proud and haloed by light like her guardian angel ) and screamed her anguish.
If anyone in the Compound heard her, they stayed away. They left her to her heartbreak in the last place that still felt like home to her.
( She wouldn’t have wanted to see them, either. Other than Jim, she was the only one who missed Tony, not Iron Man. They didn’t get to share in her grief, not if they were grieving the suit and not the man. )
Pepper didn’t cry for their future, for children and marriage and smiles. She cried for their past, for every sharp word she wished she could take back, for almost-kisses she craved, for promises of forever branded into each other’s skin and forgotten. She wiped her eyes at thoughts of their future, thoughts of a future that they were going to have. This was not their end. She would not let this be their end.
Mechanically, she stood. She toes off her heels, the tall ones that made her feel powerful. She shrugged off her suit jacket, keeping her eyes fixed on the armor. Her hands slid through her hair and tied it up and away.
Pepper put herself together piece by piece until she was a passable imitation of a whole.
For when I need a Rescue , she mouthed, stepping back into the suit’s metal embrace. It opened without prompting, accepting her into its grasp. The metal closed around her.
It should have been suffocating, like a coffin. Instead, it was like a warm hug. Her tears came back when she realized it felt like one of Tony’s hugs, all-encompassing and safe. The HUD lit up, blurry through her wet eyes.
“Hey, Pep,” Tony’s voice came through the speakers. His sheepish smile took up her HUD, so familiar yet so alien. She muffled a cry of pain with a gauntleted palm. “If you’re hearing this, I either convinced you to do the impossible and wear a suit, or something really bad has happened and I need you. Meet Rescue, Iron Man’s impulse control and savior.” Pepper laughed despite herself, despite the cries building in her throat. “That’s you, by the way, Pep. Always you. Come rescue me, okay?” Tony chuckled at his own joke. “I love you. See you soon.”
Rescue powered up with a barely audible whirr . “See you soon,” Pepper echoed. Her metal feet were as delicate as her normal heels as they clicked across the hard floor. The repulsors in her palms hummed with power, the reactor in her chest sang with it. It was clear that Rescue had been made for her and only her. She was Rescue, like Tony was Iron Man and Jim was War Machine. They were their metal counterparts, the best pieces of them cast in unyielding gold and titanium. Rescue could do what Pepper alone could not; Rescue could bring Tony home.
For the first time since the Snap, Pepper felt something like hope flutter to life in her chest, right behind where Tony’s heart was powering her suit.
Tony needed a rescue.
Luckily for him, he built her a suit.