Chapter Text
There was an incredibly well worn plush toy sitting on the arm of the Most Ultimate Of All The Thrones Of Doom.
The Succubus Queen standing before it was finding this to be rather disconcerting. Resulting in her subsequently adjusting her spike-covered, heavy leather, dominatrix outfit enough times to give tell her nervisness.
Mainly because it looked so.....without significance.
It wasn't a jarringly pristine bit of evidence of innocent life sitting amidst gore and horror. Or a destroyed wreck that pantomimed the corpse of a ghastly murdered victim of some crazed killer.
It was a old, gently cared for, fluffy, unidentifiable thing with a great big, brand new, colorfully bright bow.
If she looked way up towards where the throne's back disappeared far out of sight in the vastness of heights she would have seen the cheerfully carved bird tied on a string and dangling from the Staff of Cloud Stabbing. But thankfully, for her own piece of mind, she missed that.
A giant dog, specifically one of the monstrously massive breed known as a Yalun Hells Hound, strolled by the seat casually scooping up and carried away the cloth object on the way past.
The feared supreme evil power of the entire universe, and a few neighboring ones as well as a number of 'slight footholds' in other places, had meanwhile cocked his(?) head at her.
"Yes, what do you want?" Eyes that were glowing golden fire turned to red flames with narrow reptilian pupils of bright indigo.
Flanking the throne was also The Dread Emperor's two closest....people.
Zlyx's second- in- command, named Ee, looked like an ashen-grey colored something made of long sharp needles and lengths of thin wire, with disproportionately oversized hands and feet, and knobby knotty joints. It looked like a insanely over-exaggeratedly caricatured mad cross between a mosquito, a dragonfly, a humanoid, and a length of string. It was also the Head Councilor/ Chief Advisor and the one in charge of most of the aspects of a government that involved organization and paperwork.
On their ruler's opposite side, and also contrastingly completely by being a shape on the absolute other end of the scale for body-types, was High General Goo. Tiny and rotund, in a way that was wider than she was tall, she was shaped like an uncooked bread roll. A green toadish thing. She didn't so much have individual appendages as much as faint creases that gave the impressions of the bottom of a head, the trace of the inner arm, or the line where two legs were pressed together. A delicate pair of spectacles sat perched on the scowling beady featured face.
What the Queen saw was her instant way to absolute power.
The one who was considered to be her ruler was just a boy. Young, yet still old enough for her natural powers to overwhelm. Instinctively she arched, gave a little stretch, 'innocently' made a couple of bounces, and shimmy/slunk/strode forward in a manner that was irresistibly provocative to all.
The Head Councilor stiffened in disapproval but given that the 'thing' was, quite visibly because it was forgoing clothing that day, without anything at all, as far as she could see, and therefore entirely flatly smooth, completely sexless she wasn't too surprised it wasn't reacting like anyone normal.
Her metal-studded boots conquered the steps up the dais to the royal throne and she rose up advancing till heaving leather encased bosom loomed triumphantly a mere hairsbreadth from the small male's startled face. Bending close so her blood-red painted lips nearly touched his ear she moaned softly, breathless, and high....before snarling out a growled command. "Fall to your knees at the feet of your Mistress you small,pathetic, insignificant worm!" Hitting him with the full force of her sex appeal.
His evilness' nose crinkled. "That's stupid."
"What-?" She staggered a little as she was elbowed out of his personal space.
"And would you please back off."
The High General looked ready to jump in and forcibly remove her from their lord's proximity.
Not daunted, too much, by the unfathomable hitch in proceedings she continued on. " You really want it. It's what you neeed! Deep down you crave it! My touch. My body."
"No I don't."
"Yes you do. Everyone does. Maybe you just don't know it or want to admit to it yet."
" Not me."
" Of course you. Its natural. Its the strongest influence there is! The motive behind it all! Sex and procreation is the whole reason for existing!"
"Not mine."
" Mine neither."
"I know I've never found any appeal to it."
"And if one were to look closely at real life instead of parroting ignorant public opinion and blindly following socially assumed pre-arranged roles, which I know you won't, you may find that in truth is very different and usually quite the opposite."
The succumbs ignored the voiced opinions of the emperor's minions- they didn't matter anyway.
"You really aren't grown are you!" The smoothness of his features possibly really were the signs of actual underdevelopment.
" No actually I really am entirely mature...more so than you. And I'm also becoming rather put out with people trying to convince me to want something when I know I do not. It has gotten out of hand."
"How many does this make it this year?"
" Let's see... There was the rather dim barbarian thug who thought I was a teenaged girl-."
" Granted you were wearing the leather kilt and oversized shoulder pads with the spikes which is evidently veeery popular with some of the 'tough, rough, mad, bad, mean, loud, and rude' feminine sets with varying degrees of...'strength' at the moment." There was a pointed head tilt in the direction of their guest and her wardrobe.
" Ah. All right then. Anyway before that was that Evil Knight with his whole ' You're my whore now sissy cunt!"
"You do like your longer styles in more gown-like choices."
" Not helping. And then there was that creepy one with the short ruffled skirt and pig-tail hair-style."
" Yeech, I'm still trying to get that image out of my head!"
" Me too. Oh and the temple virgin princess with the see-through dress."
" Don't forget the ' poor, ordinary, normal, teenagers with unbelievable powers and ultimate destinies'!"
" Why not? They were irritating."
"Remember also that 'holy' wizard?"
" That one was hilarious!"
"Oh, and that loud woman!"
" You took one look at her dress and demanded the country supply all their fabric dye secrets!"
"No that was you!"
"I'll never forget that one who snuck into that hotel's private baths and threatened to cut things off!"
"What I remember is the look on his face when you and Ee showed him you didn't have any private bits he could cut off!" Zlyx had more than Ee 'down there' but it was a small lump with a slitted hole like a cross between the genitalia of both male and female humans' only far smaller, smoother, and indistinct. And like Ee he possessed no internal reproductive organs either.
The queen's gasp of horrified disgust interrupted the three friends' reminiscing. " By the Pits of Suffering, no wonder you're so small! You're nothing but a girl-boy!"
"No, Ee and I are both neither. The Dread Mount on the other hand is cross-gendered, both a male and a female and it is one of the reasons he grew to be the biggest." The emperor sneered.
The Dread Mount was a mountain sized and shaped hump-backed creature who's chest was so deep it almost brushed the ground, stubby legs that were so short in comparison to the bulky body as to be near nothings, and had a set of permanent antlers like horizon dominating pointy-edged cloudbanks. His name was Baroque.
" Now you may escort out guest out General." What went unsaid was the implied 'before I murder her in a unnecessarily violent and gory manner out of disgust'.
"My lord, as I was about to tell you before we were interrupted, there is an urgent matter regarding the Defenders of Goodness Fellowship!" Sure it as another unpleasant subject but at lest it would work to distract their lord from becoming......dramatic.
"Oh wonderful. What do they want now?"
"They're issuing a formal challenge."
" The actual fighting will be representatives then."
" We don't have any champions!"
"We'll need to get a Paladin."
" Summoning a Great Demon from some deepest hells or Dungeon Dimension always works."