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Team fucking Rainbow Six. God's righteous men and women.
They’re a multicultural, multinational team of warriors who, thanks to some notable successes against a new terrorist cell named the ‘White Masks’, are the only team in the world with the military clearance to operate wherever the hell they wanted. No red tape for these guys, they were sanctioned for all out warfare against anyone and anything that might threaten humanity.
Perhaps in the past you’d have admired them, maybe even been a tad jealous of their free reign, but now stood across from the legends themselves you felt nothing but annoyance and a little bit of rage.
Their secretive leader, a young Asian man referred to only as ‘Six’, stands uncomfortably close to your right side with one hand on your tensing shoulder and the other gesturing on occasion to the audience in front of you.
You’d tuned out a few moments ago to what Six was telling the operatives, your attention trying to be anywhere but on the few familiar smiling faces that were looking at you, waiting for you to at least spare them a glance and acknowledge that they were there.
‘This is wrong.’
You shouldn't be here. A wolf doesn't hunt with the show ponies, it skulks in the shadows with its pack and waits for a shot to kill.
‘You don’t have a pack, they’re all gone. You’re alone.’
Oh, right. How could you forget that?
“- so that is why I believe our new friend Crow here will fit in quite nicely with our little family. After all, even our oldest war dogs like Thatcher can be taught a thing or two from a former Ghost. So, with that in mind, I look forward to seeing what you can do for Rainbow, Crow! Welcome to the team.”
Suddenly a hand was outstretched towards your own and without missing a beat you took it and reciprocated the greeting shake, noting the strength in the grip.
For such a small man he had an impressive hold.
“Thank you. I’m sure the pleasure will be all mine.”
The lie made acid pool in your stomach. You couldn’t think of anything worse right now.
“Alright Rainbow, dismissed.And remember, Doc is running physicals again starting from tomorrow. Report to him at your earliest convenience.”
There was a collective groan at that followed by a little laughter coming from the man you presumed was ‘Doc’.
Six ended the briefing and turned towards you, obviously waiting for you to hit him with a barrage of questions given the nature of your arrival, but polite enough to wait for the room to empty first it would seem.
You had plenty to ask him, but given you only found out about your transfer an hour before you were shipped here you weren’t really in a chatty mood. More of a, ‘ask that Scottish operator over there to cave your head in with his hammer because fuck everything right now’ kinda mood.
All but a few members of the audience started to get up and leave, many likely hoping to return back to their work judging by the speed in which some left the room. A few lingered to peer at you and perhaps even contemplated coming to introduce themselves, but none followed through with it.
Eventually only five remained besides yourself and Six, and they were beckoning towards the man who excused himself for a moment to go and speak with them. Left there in the spotlight you let your gaze wander around the room to the numerous consoles and maps that adorned the walls.
The tech looked to be expensive, which in turn made you feel even more out of place, because as a Ghost the weapons and shit you used on missions usually came out of your own pocket or were ‘liberated’ from an enemy insurgent, here it looked like they were fully funded and rolling in it.
You must have zoned out because all of a sudden Six was back at your side and feigning a cough, trying to garner your attention to answer the question he had asked that you clearly didn’t hear.
‘Shit Crow, lousy first impression.’
Luckily your new handler didn’t seem to mind your unprofessionalism, in fact he seemed to be quite Intrigued by your absentmindness, but repeated his question nonetheless.
“Sorry Crow I know you’ve had a long flight. I was just saying that it’s my understanding that you know three of my operatives already, correct?”
Once again your mind had distracted you and prevented you from noticing that 3 women you had definitely met before were now stood in front of you, waiting for you to say something other than gawk at them.
Fuck, not them.
Violent memories tried to breach the surface and threaten to take hold of you, but they were beaten back down. The last time you met these ladies you left them with the impression you were a badass, not a shell shocked mute. Better buckle up quick before they write you off too like the army docs.
You swallowed the lump in your throat and donned the usual facade of cold, stoic bitch.
“Affirmative. We met during my last operation. Twitch, Valkyrie and Caveira. It’s good to see you all again.” A feigned smile. Well, not really. It was nice to see Valkyrie again and Twitch, Caviera on the other hand … not so much.
“Is it?”
‘Speak of the devil’
The beautiful interrogator with the face of a demon spoke first. A sly grin curling on her lips.
“Because the last time we met I threatened your boss’s life and you nearly drew your firearm on me.” She added, folding her arms across her chest and shrugging at Six’s inquisitive look.
How could you forget, that was the day before everything started to go to shit.
“Leave her be Cav.” Twitch spoke up now, offering you somewhat of an apologetic smile for the previous actions of her friend. “It’s good to see you too Crow, at least this time we can meet on more hospitable grounds. Now we have the chance to thank you properly for you and your team's help back in Bolivia.”
“Tracking down this wayward idiot.” Valkyrie interjected, jabbing a thumb in Caveiras direction before fixing you a warm grin. The BOPE operative at least having the good sense to look sheepish under her bosses hardened stare and you had to admit you could see why, Valkyrie just oozed intimidation … but then again that smile was kind of dazzling.
Judging by the strange look he was giving you four, it quickly became apparent to you that Six didn’t know the truth behind why you knew three of his operatives already. A small smile made its way to your lips at that.
“Seriously though, I appreciate everything you did for us back then. We were a little out of our depth dealing with Santa Blanca and without your expertise god knows what trouble Cav would have gotten herself into.” Valkyrie added, offering you a hand which you made to take but stopped as Cav began to talk again.
“Hey I would have done just fine without you, the Narcos were easy to break. A little more time and I’d have found my brother without your help. That ‘El Sueno’ puta would have been weak prey for me,” Caveira muttered under her breath, failing to notice the stillness in the air as the conversation ended abruptly with you staring at Valkyries hand still.
Your eyes were suddenly glassy, throat dry, numbness spreading fast. You knew this feeling all too well, and like usual the bitch had sure picked it’s moment to say hi.
It was a flashback, laughter that echoes so loud in your ears you think they will never stop ringing. The sound of an engine misfiring.
Why oh why did she have to say that name right now?!
Alarmed at the sudden change in the atmosphere Valkyrie pulled back her hand and looked to Twitch and Six who were both staring at you. The GIGN operator caught on quicker than her BOPE friend and excused herself, taking Cav with her and offering quick goodbyes that she suspected would go unheard by you.
The sound of the door shutting behind them snapped you back to reality and for a moment you looked around in a wild panic before Six’s hand found your shoulder again and brought with it a little peace.
“Sorry.” You breathed out, ignoring the look of alarm on Valkyries face. “Long flight and no R’n’R in years, I’m a little on edge. Been an eternity since I’ve been somewhere this quiet.” You tried to joke and offer an excuse for your behaviour but deep down you know the Navy Seal won’t buy it.
“Don’t sweat it! We all have those kind of days.” Valkyrie beamed at you, her smile almost warm enough to make you melt. There’s something about the way she’s looking at you that reminds you of home and that’s startling enough to make you want to retreat.
She’s being nice, too nice for someone who might have to go into the field with you and expect to come out intact.
“Agreed.” Six added, letting go of your shoulder and matching his operatives smiles. “I understand that this transition was not what you wanted Crow-“
‘What a fucking understatement.’
“-but in time I believe you will come to realise all the good you can do as a member of Rainbow. For now I think you should get some rest. Valkyrie here will be in charge of showing you the ropes and smoothing this transition for you, trust in her capable hands and you will be just fine. I expect great things from you. Dismissed.”
On instinct you snapped to attention, Valkyrie doing the same but her smirk indicated this was not what they did here, she did it to save you some face.
Why was she being so nice and accommodating? She’s a fucking SEAL for crying out loud?
With Six finally leaving you be you actually felt the fatigue you’d been feigning creep up on you and you had to stifle a yawn. It truly had been a whiplash kind of day so you were hoping that Valkyrie would just show you to your quarters and leave you be.
And that she did. But not before making sure you knew where she would be if you needed her.
‘She lives next door… great. Hopefully she wouldn’t mind some occasionally screaming.’
The morbid thought going as soon as it had come.
“Alright normally I would show you around and get you acclimated to the base, but given the lateness of your arrival and your obvious fatigue we’ll hold off for now.”
It was nearing midnight, late by the working man standards but for you a stable sleeping pattern didn’t exist and you doubted it did for Valkyrie and the other Rainbow operators either. She was being nice again, she knows your weak. Probably can’t wait to get away from you and warn the others.
“Your orientation will be at 09:00 tomorrow, but if you want I can give you somewhat of an impersonal rundown over breakfast in the morning and introduce you to some of your new team mates. 07:00 in the mess down this hall if you want?”
Oh right. Breakfast, cooked meals. No rations or MRE’s for you anymore.
You must have spaced again because the earlier look of concern was back on Valkyries face.
Get it together idiot.
“Sorry, the thought of being able to eat actual food and not army sanctioned crap got me for a moment.”
The SEAL laughed at that, clearly understanding exactly where you were coming from. And honestly, her laughter sounded completely genuine and just nice to hear.
Maybe your snap judgements on her were unfounded?
‘Gotta work on that.’
“Don’t get your hopes up Crow, it’s not much better than your average ration pack. Just a tad warmer kid! So, is it a date?”
“A date?” You blinked, your cheeks flushing as your eyes wandered to the woman’s tattooed muscles.
Valkyrie seemed amused, she definitely caught you looking.
Why were you looking? You don’t want to be here moron stop looking to get attached!
“Figure of speech Crow!” The soldier smirked.
And there was that feeling in your gut again.
“Y/N!” You blurted out without any context. Unsure of why you just told her your god damn name rather than accepting the invite and retreating to the safety of solitude.
“Pardon?” Valkyrie asked carefully, clearly unaware of the effect she was having on you.
“My name, Y/N ... I don’t really like Crow” you fumble “and yes, breakfast would be good. Thank you.”
“Ok, Meghan.” She offers up her name easily and absentmindedly you repeat it out loud which earn you another smirk from the American operative. “I’ll see you tomorrow Y/N!”
And with that she really does leave, meaning you’re finally alone with your thoughts.
Great. Time to overthink all your life's choices.
It’s 1am and you can’t sleep. You’ve been at Hereford base not even a day and already you’re climbing the walls.
Sleep just ain’t coming for you yet.
Normally when your head gets like this you’ll tinker with your drone and fly it around a little while, but you’re not sure if it was even shipped here with you, let alone fancy getting caught sneaking out to find the armoury to look for it.
“Ughhhh” you growl to the darkness and kick off the blankets.
Your bed is too soft, the place is too quiet and you’re still a little paranoid that your room has been bugged even though you swept it within minutes of being left alone. It came up empty you still can’t help but feel someone is watching you right now.
But you wouldn’t blame them. Your file had you pegged as a flight risk, a ticking time bomb. Something you had snorted at when you had first read it, but now … now you felt like going AWOL wasn’t such a bad idea.
It’s a tantalising thought, but a thought the two warring sides of your brain don’t like to entertain for long. Because despite it all you’re still Ghost, and over a decade of training and experience doesn’t just vanish because someone unscrewed your bottle.
Ghosts don’t run from their demons, they become them. So you won’t bolt.
Something you announce out loud to your imagined audience before sighing audibly again and turning over in your bed for what feels like the hundredth time tonight.
It’s crazy, but you actually fucking miss the cold mountain air blasting your face and the feeling of stone and dirt beneath your back as you slept. You miss it so much that after fruitlessly trying to sleep for the past 3 hours you just give up with the warm comfy bed and lie down on your room floor, dragging just a pillow and leaving the blanket to occupy the mattress that offends you so.
It’s not quite the same as sleeping outside in the wildlands, but the floor is cold and solid, so it’s close enough.
With that taken care of you finally feel your restlessness start to ease off, allowing you to reflect on your current situation.
Your plans post Operation Kingslayer had been quite simple. Get drunk, get fucked up, jack a chopper and crash it into the side of a canyon. Because lord knows you were done with this life. You had no family to leave behind, no friends anymore … hell, no one to really bat an eye at you being gone.
And the sad part of all that? You didn’t even care.
Because El Sueno, Santa Blancas former Head Sicario turned CIA snitch, had taken everything from you last year in Bolivia when he tortured you and made you watch him kill your team. In doing so he broke that which had been trained to be unbreakable.
But the government doesn’t give up its property that easy, no matter how damaged it might be. Especially considering the property in question (you) brought them the single most valuable informant they could ever hope to find in their war on drugs (seeing your only friends laying face down in their own blood flipped some super soldier switch in your head and you went on a rampage, your handler only just managing to stop you from killing him).
So Instead they threw your ass to their psych docs and made you a prisoner bound by contract. You were a workhorse that they just weren’t willing to put to pasture yet. Eager for just one more trophy from you.
You figured placing you with Rainbow Six was just another foolish attempt to get that out of you. And it was going to backfire and blow up in their faces, you just knew it. Only now there was a whole new team of people that would get caught in the crossfire, a casualty list that would just keep on climbing the longer they kept up this damn facade that you were still the soldier they sent into that jungle hell.
Rainbow didn’t deserve this, Meghan didn’t deserve this.
You succumb to sleep, exhaustion knocking you out cold finally.