Chapter Text
“Call Aziraphale!”
”Calling Aziraphale..... We’re sorry all mobile phone lines-“
“Shit. Shit. SHIT! Why me.”
Crowley slammed his hands against the steering wheel of his bentley. He lets out a deep breath and continues to drive through the rain. He’s going faster than anyone should, or would dare to go on a wet road, but that’s not what he’s focused on right now.
He’s focusing on what will happen when he hands over the baby to the nuns. Simple, they’ll exchange him with the ambassador’s child. And after that they’ll raise him. And after that, he’ll grow to destroy the world, bring Armageddon, and then heaven and hell will fight to the death. After that, either eternity of hellfire or holy harmonies.
He’s known this for thousands of years. But knowing about something, and being the indirect cause of it are two different things.
”But, why me?”
”Because you deserve it, Darling.”
He almost completely swerves off the road because of the sudden voice coming from his radio. The voice of Freddie calling him darling hasn’t been something he’s heard recently; caught him by surprise.
”Oh, hello, um,” he stops to think on how to address them. “Lord.”
”I see you’ve gotten the child.”
”Oh yes, certainly.” Crowley takes a small look in his rear view mirror just to make sure the basket is still there.
”I’ll send you your duties, sweets.”
”Oh, sir, there’s really no need-“
But it was too late, his vision was already being fogged. He hated when they did this; it was as if they couldn’t catch up and just say what they wanted him to do.
He pulls out of it just in time to pull the car to a hard right, almost not missing the large truck that was about to hit him head on. The only problem is, this time, he went completely off. The car slides in between two trees, absolutely ruining the paint job and also managing to be rough enough to wake the child.
With the radio now back on, Bohemian Rhapsody had finished and in came the snapping of Killer Queen. He decides to turn the radio completely off before grabbing the basket from the backseat and setting it in the front.
In a split moment decision, Crowley lifts the closest side of it to see the small, blonde, baby he’d been tasked to give to the nuns. This was the Antichrist. The being that was to bring about the end of the world.
”You don’t know the headache you’re causing me.”
Crowley closed it back and put the car in reverse, turning around and going the opposite way from where he was supposed to go. He was a demon, after all. Demons don’t follow rules.