Chapter Text
“This is - oh, it’s not on? Right okay, okay. Turning it on. This is so weird...”
“Okay, here we go. So what should I do, am I supposed to just talk to you? Answer your questions, okay. I can do that. First question: Do I enjoy the fact that even as the CEO’s son, I’m just working as a sales rep for Queen Consolidated instead of helping run the company?”
“Well... I come to work every day, spend a few hours on the phone selling whatever they tell me to sell and then I get to go back home and not have to worry about anything else. So basically, I get paid to talk on the phone… And it’s fine, I guess. It’s the easiest job ever, and it stops my parents from cutting me off from my trust fund so… [nervous laughter].”
“Um, yeah, the people I work with are cool. They don’t care that I’m me. Some of them probably don't even realise who I am either. Except, well, Adrian's a bit of a pain in the ass, but I think it's because I'm new. But! We hired a new receptionist last month, Felicity, so I’m not the new kid on the block anymore which means the hazing should stop soon. Hopefully.”
“Felicity? Well, she’s really pretty- uh, pretty good at her job, I mean. I don’t really know her. Why? Wait, did she say something about me? In her interview thing? What did she say? Come on -”
“How did it go?”
He looks up from his phone at the question, smiling when sees Felicity peering at him over the top of her monitors, glasses glinting under the bright fluorescent office lights.
He leaves his desk, ignoring Adrian’s pointed murmur of “You’re supposed to be working, newbie,” and strolls over to lean over the reception counter.
“Good, I think. I can’t believe we have to do this thing every day. How did your interview go?”
“Fun! It’s not every day that I’m given free reign to talk, you know? Usually people tell me to stop talking, but these guys were all ‘Keep going, this is great!’ and I’m pretty sure they’re going to have a great time editing or whatever, but it was fun! Although, then they asked me if I enjoyed my job and how do you answer that, right? Because if I say no, then that looks bad, and if I say yes then I’d be - uh...”
Her mouth snaps shut and she blinks at him guiltily. “Anyway, I said yes. Because I totally love my job.”
He doesn’t know much about Felicity, since she’s a new addition to the team, but today, he finds out that she’s a horrible liar. Her cheeks turns a pretty pink colour as she shifts her gaze to stare blankly at her computer screens. Interesting.
He’s definitely curious about Felicity’s slip of tongue, but he doesn’t want to make her feel more uncomfortable so he ignores her gaffe instead, tabling it for another time.
“I told them I’m enjoying myself at work too,” Oliver offers. “This job is hands down, the easiest money maker ever.”
That makes her look up at him in surprise, pursing her lips in disbelief. “Not to - not to be offensive, but your bank account probably earns more interest in a month than any of us here make in a year without you having to do anything. That’s probably easier than all of this.”
Okay, wow.
He’s taken aback by her bluntness, but somehow... it endears her more to him. He’s so used to people tip-toeing around the fact that he’s Oliver Queen or just outright ignoring it - like most of his other colleagues do - and having Felicity talk about the size of his bank account so casually is refreshing.
“I’m trying to be a good role model for Thea.” He trades honesty for honesty. “I’m hoping it’s not too late, of course, but I think maybe seeing me in a steady nine-to-five job might I don’t know, convince her that drugs and partying isn’t the best way to live her life.”
Felicity quirks an eyebrow at him, and oh, that’s cute. “Little bit hypocritical, considering the kind of trouble you get into.” There’s a cheeky glint in her gaze and a ghost of a smile on her lips so he figures she’s not really judging him - even though he understands if she is. “But go you for being a good big brother!”
“Well, I try,” he preens. He’s not sure what’s happening, but the small, not really even a real praise coming from her makes him feel all gooey inside. He decides then that he likes that feeling. “I’m trying to be a better person in general.”
“Mm. Might want to try to be better at your desk maybe,” Felicity murmurs, tilting her chin towards his desk behind him.
He whips around and finds Adrian hovering by his screen, squinting at the display and finger-pecking at his keyboard.
“What the hell are you doing?” he growls, storming over to his desk. “Back off!”
“Since you prefer flirting over working, I thought you wouldn’t mind if I transferred some of your clients over to me so I can actually -,”
“I wasn’t flirting,” Oliver barks. “Go away, Adrian!” He elbows his frustrating coworker out of the way, sending his office chair rolling backwards, and tries to wrestle his keyboard out of Adrian’s dumb hands.
What follows is not something he’s proud of, but Adrian lunges at him and instinct, together years of experience participating in bar brawls, means he ducks the attack with perfect timing, and then proceeds to tackle the other man to the ground.
Adrian yells bloody murder, causing their HR rep to pop his head out of the Annex, and soon enough a crowd starts gathering around them. Roy, their intern who’s barely of legal age, starts collecting bills from the rest of their colleagues.
“Don’t mess with my computer!” Oliver grunts, narrowly avoiding a fist to his face. He retaliates by kneeing Adrian in the gut, and Adrian howls pitifully before tapping his palm on the floor.
Oliver scrambles to his feet, holding his hand out to help Adrian up. “Truce?” he asks as he eyes the documentary crew who are still filming them warily.
“Fine, truce,” Adrian grumps, slinking away to his desk as he wipes his hands down his pants. He makes a point to wince and hiss as he sits back down at his desk, glaring at Oliver. “If I get any permanent injuries from this, you’re paying all my medical bills.”
Oliver merely rolls his eyes at his dramatics. The crowd disperses around them with a collective sigh, disappointed that their entertainment for the afternoon is over. When Roy struts past Oliver on his way to his desk in the Annex with a suspicious smile on his face, Oliver lashes his hand out, catching him by his collar.
“Give everyone back their money,” he tells Roy, staring at him sternly. “Now.”
“Hey, no fair! They gave me -”
“Now, Roy!”
The kid scowls at him, but relents. He digs a wad of bills out of his pocket and starts handing them back, grumbling surly.
Oliver’s mildly surprised when he stops at reception, sliding a crisp fifty dollar note across the counter.
He rolls his chair towards Felicity, careful not to leave the general vicinity of his work space - he’s a fast learner after all. “Felicity Smoak, I never would have took you for the gambling type...”
Felicity shrugs at him. “You might be able to take a girl out of Vegas, but you can never take Vegas out of a girl.”
A million questions fly through his brain. She grew up in Vegas? Or did she use to live there? How did she end up in Starling City? What exactly is her story? God, he suddenly finds himself desperate to know everything about her.
He’s dying to walk over to her and ask, but Adrian coughs obnoxiously loudly next to him and Oliver decides to save his questions for another time. He turns back to his computer, ready to actually do some work, when the small intra-office messenger window pops up with a message from Felicity.
‘For what it’s worth, my money was on you :)’
And the warm, gooey feeling in his chest returns with a vengeance.
Soon after that, Oliver makes it a personal quest - goddamn it, Adrian’s obsession with RPGs has seeped into his vocabulary - to get to know Felicity a little better.
He learns that she’s an only child to a single mother (God, you don’t want to meet my mother - ever), grew up in Vegas (You tend to pick up a thing or two about gambling when you have to spend most of your days and nights at the casino your mother works at because she can’t afford a babysitter), and that she graduated top of her class at MIT with two Masters degrees at nineteen.
So why then, is she slumming it with him at one of Queen Consolidated’s under-performing sales divisions?
Not that he’s complaining of course. Felicity’s by far the easiest person to get along with in the office, the funniest, and she’s so smart that his prank wars with Adrian have reached a new height of sophistication that he never would have achieved without her.
“Overwatch to Arrow, target spotted, en route to rendezvous point, over.” Her voice crackles in his ear through what just might be the world’s smallest Bluetooth earpiece.
“Copy that, on my way,” he responds quietly, moving from his hiding spot. Sure enough, when he looks out the window, there’s a shadow skulking across the office back lot, making its way towards the building’s back entrance.
“You’re supposed to say over when you’re done, over. ”
He chuckles at the frustration in her voice. “I think you’re taking this a little too seriously, Felic-”
“No names! Oh my god, did you even read the briefing I emailed you last night? Over!”
No, he didn’t read the fifteen page long email she sent him, but he isn’t going to tell her that. “Of course I did, Overwatch,” he emphasises the code name he’d given her. “Over!” He adds hurriedly.
“You never know who could be listening in on these things, jeez. Constant vigilance!” She cackles to herself. “Like Mad-Eye Moody, get it? Over.”
No, he doesn’t get it, but having spent a good amount of time hanging out with Felicity means he’s very used to her often obscure (to him anyway) pop culture references so he lets it slide.
“I thought you were an IT genius, are you saying you let us use tech that could be compromised by some bored dweeb in his mom’s basement tinkering with -”
He’s interrupted by a shrill whine in his ear, sharp and almost painful, before Felicity’s voice returns.
“One, how dare you question my genius?! And two, you could be describing yourself, Mr. still lives at home with his parents, over.”
“The difference being I’m not a bored dweeb,” he retorts. The elevator light flashes once, indicating that someone is getting on from the ground floor. “Oh, I think he’s here, going radio silent, over!”
He creeps into the Manager’s office, crouching down and peering out the blinds just as the elevator dings. Footsteps echo down the short hallway and then Adrian’s silhouette appears, standing by the reception area, backpack slung over one shoulder.
“Special Agent Chase reporting for duty,” he whispers comically into nothingness.
Felicity sniggers in his ear and Oliver has to bite the inside of his cheek to keep himself from laughing out loud.
“Hello?” Adrian questions. “Is anyone here? I’m awaiting further instructions!”
“Is he standing by the reception? Over.”
Oliver frowns. How does she expect him to answer her when he’s supposed to be quiet?
“Oh my god, I knew you didn’t read my email! Ugh, I go through so much effort for your dumb pranks, and this is how you repay me? Tap once against your earpiece for yes, you jerk. Over.”
He taps once obediently.
“Good okay, stand by.” She must be excited about this too if she’s forgotten her own rule about - “Oh! Over!”
God, she’s adorable. Cute. Amazing.
Yes, he realises he’s got it bad for her, but it’s just a crush, like a stupid, juvenile, high school crush. He’s sure he’ll get over it eventually. She’s not even his usual type.
He’s probably only crushing so hard because Felicity’s the only one in their office who gives him the time of day and seems to enjoy pranking Adrian as much as he does.
“Adrian Chase! This is your Overlord speaking!”
He’s torn out of his thoughts by Felicity’s voice - no longer confined to his ear, but echoing through the dark empty office. It’s slightly distorted, but it’s still distinctively hers.
Adrian startles, head whipping around. “Who - where are you?”
“Do you have the package?”
“I, uh... yeah.” Adrian pulls a box out from his backpack, still glancing furtively around as if he can see in the dark. “Here, yeah, I have it. Who do I give this to?”
“Just leave it on the counter -”
“Why don’t you just show yourself!” Adrian interrupts suddenly, clearly frustrated. “This has gone on for too long, if I’m really a Secret Agent then -”
“Adrian Chase, a fax is going to come through right now, I’d like you to read it please. Out loud.”
That’s Oliver’s cue.
Oliver slinks out of the office while Adrian’s distracted by the incoming fax, creeping slowly until he’s right behind him. Adrian pulls the paper out of the machine, bringing it up to his face.
Felicity laughs in his ear and his stomach does a somersault. “He’s going to kill you,” she sing-songs.
“I, Adrian Chase, hereby... what the... hereby bequeath this package to the Supreme Lord of All Things... Oliver QUEEN?! QUEEN!!?”
Oliver taps Adrian on his shoulder, ducks as the other man swings around with his arm outstretched, and grabs the box off the counter.
“Thanks, man!” he chirps, grinning.
He pops the lid, revealing a four-pack of donuts as a warning of “You better save the one with sprinkles for me, Oliver!” comes through in his ear.
“What the hell?! What’s the meaning of this?! You - you’re can’t -” Adrian goes red in the face, sputtering, before swinging his backpack at Oliver. “You got me out here in the middle of the night for a stupid prank?”
“Thank you for your service, Special Agent Adrian Chase, ” Oliver laughs, deftly avoiding him. “Man, you really fell for this one, Adrian. Secret Agent Chase. Seriously. As if a federal agency would -”
“You didn’t do this by yourself!” His high-pitched whine only makes Felicity burst in peals of laughter again.
If the world ended right now, and Felicity’s laughter is the last sound he’ll hear before he dies - well, he thinks he’d die happy.
“This has Felicity written all over it. You don’t know how to send emails from the FBI,” Adrian snaps angrily. “I can’t believe you dragged her into this.”
“Tell him I didn’t actually send emails from the FBI,” Felicity gasps in between her cackling.
“It may come as a surprise to you, but I can’t make Felicity do anything she doesn't want to do. Want a donut?”
“No, my body is a temple,” Adrian sneers.
“Sucks to be your body,” Oliver shrugs the exact same time Felicity scoffs in his ear.
“Come on. Does he know you have like, a million abs? Uh. Not that I’ve noticed. Or not noticed. I’m not actively not noticing you - I mean, sometimes you’re sweaty from the gym and your shirt sticks, so you can tell that you have... abs. Can you come out now, please?”
He pictures her turning red, lips clamped shut together the way they always do after one of her adorable rambles. This time though, he feels himself turning a little red because, sure, he knows he’s in good shape, but to find out that Felicity pays attention to that too?
Well.
Interesting.
“Yeah, you can stand there and smirk at me all you want, I’ll get you back for this,” Adrian growls, pointing a finger menacingly at him. “So you better watch out!”
“Yeah, okay, I await your payback with bated breath,” Oliver winks, before gathering the box in his hands and waving. “Turn the alarm back on when you leave will you?”
Adrian doesn’t follow him into the elevator for whatever reason - probably plotting his revenge in the office, not that he’s particularly bothered. Felicity’s already waiting for him by the exit in her little Mini Cooper when he walks out, engine idling. He stops short just as he gets to the passenger side door.
“What - what are you wearing?” he asks as he pulls the door open, eyeing the beanie and ski goggles combo she definitely didn’t have on when she dropped him off earlier. He tries very hard to stifle his laughter but fails, and an embarrassing, choking noise escapes him.
“My blonde hair kind of sticks out like a sore thumb at night, and I didn’t want to be spotted when Adrian arrived. I had my beanie, and somehow, also these goggles in the back seat and you know what? Laughing at your getaway driver is extremely rude, by the way,” she grumbles as she pulls off the goggles and tosses them into the back seat.
“God, you’re ridiculous,” he breathes as he settles into his seat and draws the seat belt across his body. “Here, sprinkles just like you wanted.”
She grabs it out of his hand, takes a large bite out of the donut and hums with satisfaction under her breath. She side eyes him critically as she chews.
“What? I’m sorry I laughed at you. Your disguise is very practical.”
She swallows before handing him the rest of her donut. The car jumps into gear and they pull out onto the main road. “Nothing. Just... you’re fun. I have a lot of fun when I’m with you, that’s all.”
His stomach flips, his heart expands like he’s the Grinch or whatever, and he really, really has to fight the urge to reach over the centre console to kiss her. Platonically. On the cheek.
“I - uh, thank you. You know me, here for all your fun needs...” Fuck, that was stupid. “If you ever need fun -” NO that’s worse. “Anytime you want to piss Adrian off, I’m your guy.”
Felicity takes her eyes off the road for a brief second to give him a strange look, but thankfully doesn’t acknowledge his awkwardness. Instead, a flutter of a smile graces her lips before she turns her attention back to the front.
“No more late night shenanigans after this for me, though,” she murmurs, causing Oliver to arch his brow. “Cooper wasn’t too happy about tonight, but I told him we’ve been planning this for -”
Cooper?
His ears fill with a loud rushing noise, drowning out most of what Felicity’s telling him.
Who the hell is Cooper?
“- and it’s not like he can tell me what to do, you know? But if he’s in town, I probably should put more effort into spending time with him before he goes on another business trip, so only day time shenanigans from now on.”
“I, uh... yeah, sure.”
He’s glad that Felicity has to focus on driving and not on him because he’s sure he looks like a stunned goldfish at the moment.
All the time he spent convincing himself that the gorgeous, smart, funny woman sitting next to him wasn’t his type, he never once considered that other people would think that she's theirs.
And so with a churning, dreary, unexplainable pit forming in his gut, it dawns upon him with startling clarity that course - of course someone as amazing as Felicity would have a boyfriend.