Chapter 1
Notes:
For more content follow me at @loudblondeem
Chapter Text
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
Shinsou Hitoshi has been added to the Fuck Yeah! Class 1A! group chat
Shinsou Hitoshi name has been changed to PurpleInsomniac
PurpleInsomniac: uh hi?
DekuDeku: Hey, Shinsou!
DekuDeku: Welcome to the unofficial Class 1A group chat!
DefyingGravity: Yes! Welcome, Shinsou!
momoyoro: As vice president of Class 1A I also welcome you Shinsou Hitoshi!
Fire&Ice: Salutations, Shinsou
BubblegumBitch: Oooh, a new face!
RosietheRibbitor: It's nice to see ya!
ListenHere: Sure add more testosterone to the chat!
ListenHere: Great idea!
theROCK: Heyo, Shinsou!
PikaPikaBitch: HEYO!
PurpleInsomniac: is this everyone in the chat?
DekuDeku: Give or take yeah
PurpleInsomniac: I'm out
PurpleInsomniac has left the Fuck Yeah! Class 1A! group chat
FuckOff added PurpleInsomniac to the Fuck Yeah! Class 1A! group chat
FuckOff: If I have to be in this stupid fucking thing then so do you!
PurpleInsomniac: ugh
theROCK: The group chats not that bad
PikaPikaBitch: Yeah, we use it to plan outings and study sessions
ListenHere: Some of the time
ListenHere: We mostly use it to talk shit, post memes, and whatnot
DekuDeku: That's not true!
momoyoro: Yes it is
Fire&Ice: Yes it is
DefyingGravity: Yes it is
BubblegumBitch: Yes it is
RosietheRibbitor: Yes it is
ListenHere: Yes it is
theROCK: Yes it is
PikaPikaBitch: Yes it is
FuckOff: Yes it is
DekuDeku: etu Kacchan etu?
PurpleInsomniac: uh
DekuDeku: Okay, yes we use it to privately talk shit but we also use for good too
Fire&Ice: We do?
DekuDeku: Remember we went to the woods last year and Denki got lost?
DefyingGravity: Oh yeah, Kirishima got really worried and blew up the group chat calling for a search party!
PikaPikaBitch: I wasn't lost!
FuckOff: You were so fucking lost in those woods that we almost had to send those dogs with barrels of whiskey around their necks after you!
theROCK: They're called Saint Bernards!
theROCK: And they're the best of boys!
FuckOff: I don't give a fuck what they're called they probably would have found dunce face faster than us!
RosietheRibbitor: They don't use Saint Bernards to find people lost in the woods they use them to find people in avalanches
FuckOff: I said I don't give a fuck!
PurpleInsomniac: what were you guys doing the woods?
FuckOff: Sacrificing shitty hair and dunce face so that we can get better grades duh
theROCK: Hey!
PurpleInsomniac: shitty hair? dunce face?
BubblegumBitch: Those are Bakugou's nicknames for Kirishima and Denki!
PurpleInsomniac: and they're friends?
DekuDeku: That's just a part of Kacchan's personality! You'll get used to it!
PurpleInsomniac: really? because he sounds like an ass
FuckOff: WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST SAY?!
Chapter Text
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
PurpleInsomniac: so this is class 1 a's group chat?
momoyoro: the UNOFFICIAL group chat
PurpleInsomniac: so it's just the eleven of us?
momoyoro: Oh, no, there's more than that!
PurpleInsomniac: what?
momoyoro: It started as something the dekusquad used
PurpleInsomniac: dekusquad?
momoyoro: It's what Deku, Iida, Todoroki, and Uraraka call themselves
PurpleInsomniac: ok
momoyoro: But then the bakusquad joined in on their shit-talking sessions
PurpleInsomniac: is bakusquad similar to dekusquad?
momoyoro: Yes!
momoyoro: Except its Bakugou and his friends; Kirishima, Denki, Sero, and Mina!
momoyoro: Myself, Asui, and Jiro joined a little bit after that!
PurpleInsomniac: while this all seems very cult-like would I be correct in saying that Iida and Sero weren't part of the welcome wagon?
momoyoro: Sero was sick and Iida is usually very busy with class president duties, homework, and training to spend hours on his phone!
PurpleInsomniac: minus the class president duties you all have the same schedule!
momoyoro: And now so do you!
PurpleInsomniac: but how do you guys get everything done and make time for this group chat?
momoyoro: Oh! I'm dead inside!
PurpleInsomniac: what?
cellofame: Sero Hanta reporting for duty!
momoyoro: Welcome back, Sero!
cellofame: It's good to be back!
momoyoro: I thought you were going to be out sick longer than a couple of days?
cellofame: I probably would have if it wasn't for Bakugou!
PurpleInsomniac: bakugou helped you get better?
cellofame: Yep!
PurpleInsomniac: bakugou katsuki?
cellofame: Yes.
PurpleInsomniac: tall blonde guy with a bad attitude?
cellofame: That's him!
momoyoro: Bakugou reluctantly makes chicken noodle soup when one of the Bakusquad get sick
momoyoro: Otherwise who would he hang out with?
cellofame: Fuck yeah!
PurpleInsomniac: I still have so many questions yet I would rather lay face down in the abyss that is my mattress than face the answers
cellofame: that's fair
momoyoro: I think either Iida or Uraraka has a FAQ spreadsheet
PurpleInsomniac: there's not enough coffee or sleep in the day for me to read that spreadsheet for me not to have a depressive episode
cellofame: fair
momoyoro: fair
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
PikaPikaBitch: [shinsoumakingcoffee.jpeg]
PikaPikaBitch: GUUUYS!
BubblegumBitch: Oh my God! Look at his purple pajamas!
BubblegumBitch: I haven't seen something that cute since that one time I found Kiri sleeping with his stuffed shark!
theROCK: MINA!
Fire&Ice: That's adorable
cellofame: Which one?
cellofame: Purple boi wearing purple or Shark boi sleeping with a stuffed shark?
Fire&Ice: Both
FuckOff: WHY ARE YOU FUCKING IDIOTS BLOWING UP MY PHONE AT 7:50 IN THE FUCKING MORNING ON A SUNDAY?!
BubblegumBitch: More importantly why is Denki blushing?
PikaPikaBitch: MINA!
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
PurpleInsomniac: quick question
PurpleInsomniac: um why did bakugou slap my cup of coffee out of my hands and say that it was for waking him up so goddamn early on a Sunday?
TENya: Oh my God!
TENya: Is there glass everywhere?
TENya: Did you clean it up?
TENya: Are you okay?
TENya: Do you need to go to Recovery Girl?
momoyoro: Relax, Iida, I saw the whole thing
TENya: How is that supposed to make me feel better?
momoyoro: It was a paper cup and Shinsou immediately cleaned up the mess so it wouldn't stain the carpet!
TENya: Oh thank God!
PurpleInsomniac: it was more trying to save the coffee and less making sure it wouldn't stain
Notes:
For more content follow me at @loudblondeem
Chapter 3
Notes:
For more content follow me at @loudblondeem
Chapter Text
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
PurpleInsomniac: with how traumatic my life has been I never thought it was possible to be more traumatized
PurpleInsomniac: yet here we are
DekuDeku: I am so so sorry
PurpleInsomniac: that doesn't change the fact that something very personal was interrupted
DekuDeku: What do I have to do to make you forget this happened?
PurpleInsomniac: you don't have enough money to make me forget
DefyingGravity: What is going on?
ListenHere: I'm pretty sure Midoriya and Shinsou fucked
FuckOff: WHAT
PikaPikaBitch: WHAT
Fire&Ice: They didn't fuck
FuckOff: And how do you know?!
Fire&Ice: They haven't ever been alone together for more than fifteen minutes
FuckOff: A lot can happen in fifteen minutes!
Fire&Ice: And how would you know that?
BubblegumBitch: Yeah, Bakugou, how do you know?
FuckOff: I don't have to tell either of you shit!
Fire&Ice: Besides Shinsou isn't even Deku's type
ListenHere: And what exactly is his type?
DefyingGravity: Tall, strong boys who can kill him
BubblegumBitch: With that logic Bakugou, Todoroki, Kirishima, Shinsou, and Iida are his type
FuckOff: You three really fucking love stirring the pot don't you?
ListenHere: You're not denying it
momoyoro: Guys, you're making Deku blush!
cellofame: Fuck that! You're making Denki blush!
DefyingGravity: What is Shinsou doing?
BubblegumBitch: He has the same look Aizawa has when we're screwing around too much
RosietheRibbitor: That I'm-not-mad-just-disappointed look
theROCK: I guess the true question is, is Deku Shinsou's type?
theROCK: Or if he even is into guys?
Fire&Ice: Fuck! I didn't even think about that!
momoyoro: But what are the chances that we found the one UA student who is straight?
BubblegumBitch: I just assume that everyone I meet is Bi until proven otherwise
RosietheRibbitor: We're leaving out another possibility you guys
DefyingGravity: And what would that be?
ListenHere: Yeah, we're all ears
RosietheRibbitor: What if he doesn't like sex at all?
RosietheRibbitor: What if he's asexual?
DekuDeku: I can wholeheartedly say that he's not asexual
FuckOff: AND HOW THE FUCK DO YOU KNOW THAT?!
theROCK: Bakubro totally not manly to yell in real life and in the chat
Fire&Ice: Okay but….
Fire&Ice: Deku, how do you know that?
PikaPikaBitch: Yeah, what they said!
FuckOff: Deku, I will cook you food for a week if you just tell us
DekuDeku: I invited myself to Shinsou's dorm last night so he can copy my notes and I may have walked in on Shinsou touching himself and let me just say…he is blessed!
PurpleInsomniac: that's it!
PurpleInsomniac: I'm done with this cursed chat and that green-haired fuck!
PurpleInsomniac has left the Fuck Yeah! Class 1A! group chat
RosietheRibbitor: Okay, but by blessed are you referring to his body or his dick?
momoyoro: Tsuyu!
DefyingGravity: Asui!
RosietheRibbitor: You're all thinking it! And you know it!
ListenHere: I'm not
BubblegumBitch: I am
DekuDeku: Oh my God! How am I going to be able to look Shinsou in the face?!
DekuDeku: Maybe Aizawa will let me switch homerooms?
Fire&Ice: And tell him what?
Fire&Ice: That you want to switch because you accidentally seen your friends dick and now things are awkward?
cellofame: Seeing your friends dick isn't really that big of a deal
ListenHere: Speaking from experience, Sero?
cellofame: I count on one hand how many times I've seen Bakugou, Kirishima, and Denki's dick
momoyoro: Intentionally or accidentally?
BubblegumBitch: You guys are missing the point!
ListenHere: Which is?
BubblegumBitch: Was Deku talking about Shinsou's body or his dick?
Fire&Ice: By how embarrassed he is I'm going to take a wild guess and say dick
Fire&Ice: But you guys are missing the moral of this story
DefyingGravity: And that would be?
Fire&Ice: To KNOCK on any door
ListenHere: It could also be said that said door should be LOCKED when those kinds of things are going down
cellofame: Yeah but whose first thought when masturbating is to lock the door because who knows if Midoriya is going to barge in?
DekuDeku: Okay guys, I'm going to go and die of embarrassment now!
Chapter 4
Notes:
For more content follow me at @loudblondeem
Chapter Text
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
momoyoro: I haven't seen Shinsou since the group chat debacle and it's been a week should I be worried?
ListenHere: It baffles me that people think you're responsible yet you have to ask that question
momoyoro: Technically, Iida is the responsible one and I'm just there for emotional support
RosietheRibbitor: He usually eats lunch in the library but I haven't seen him there either
ListenHere: Should we be worried?
momoyoro: I mean no one has been complaining about a decaying smell coming from his room so…
RosietheRibbitor: So we should be concerned but not too concerned that we talk to Iida or Aizawa?
ListenHere: This is officially more than a three-person job!
ListenHere: Which means…
ListenHere: @DekuDeku @FuckOff
ListenHere: Have you idiots seen Shinsou around?
DekuDeku: I have been super busy with training and homework but now that you mention it...no I haven't.
FuckOff: I'm not eye bags babysitter!
DekuDeku: Be nice, Kacchan!
DekuDeku: He's probably still embarrassed about last week I know I am!
ListenHere: If they don't know where he is there is only one thing left to do!
ListenHere: Dekusquad! Bakusquad! Assemble!
BubblegumBitch: Token female checking in!
theROCK: I'm going to start a red riot checking in!
cellofame: Loveable idiot #2 checking in!
DefyingGravity: Token female #2 checking in!
Fire&Ice: First I'm hot and then I'm cold checking in!
Fire&Ice: Iida would be here too except he has important class president duties to attend to
ListenHere: When I called for the Bakusquad to assemble I meant all of Bakusquad
ListenHere: Where is Denki?
theROCK: He wasn't at breakfast this morning
cellofame: That's odd Denki loves food
BubblegumBitch: Maybe he went off-campus?
ListenHere: We'll just have to do this without him then!
ListenHere: Has anybody seen Shinsou since the group chat debacle?
theROCK: Uh now that you mention it I haven't
cellofame: Can't say that I have
BubblegumBitch: We've been kind of busy keeping Bakugou from murdering someone
theROCK: It's a full-time job
cellofame: Ditto
FuckOff: YOU ASSHOLES THINK I'M SOME KIND OF FUCKING PSYCHOPATH THAT NEEDS TO BE WATCHED NOW?!
theROCK: Bro, you almost threw hands with the lunch staff because they once gave you scrambled eggs instead of over easy
FuckOff: OF COURSE I WAS ANGRY I GOT TOAST SO I COULD DIP IT IN THE YOLK WHAT THE FUCK WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH DRY TOAST AND SCRAMBLED EGGS?!
cellofame: This is why we've been sneaking blood pressure pills into your food
FuckOff: WHAT?!
cellofame: What?
BubblegumBitch: Yeah it's a full-time job
ListenHere: I'll take that as a no from Bakusquad minus Denki
ListenHere: Dekusquad?
DefyingGravity: It's a no from me but have you guys checked Class 1B?
DefyingGravity: When he's not with us he's usually hanging out with that Monoma kid from 1B
RosietheRibbitor: I'm on it!
Fire&Ice: I haven't either but have you guys checked his room?
ListenHere: Uh….Momo?
momoyoro: No we haven't?
Fire&Ice: You guys are frantically trying to find him yet you haven't looked to see if he was in his room?
ListenHere: We is a strong word
momoyoro: You are just as much a part of this as I am!
ListenHere: You're the one who noticed him missing but wasn't sure if you should be worried!
momoyoro: It's a valid question
ListenHere: Well, it's a valid concern of mine now
momoyoro: Oh so you're finally concerned about something besides yourself now?
ListenHere: No
momoyoro: Okay hot topic!
ListenHere: Aww you think I'm hot
RosietheRibbitor: I'm back!
RosietheRibbitor: Monoma from 1B said he hasn't seen Shinsou either
RosietheRibbitor: What have I missed?
Fire&Ice: Besides Jirou and Momo's arguing turned flirting?
Fire&Ice: Nothing
momoyoro: We were not flirting!
ListenHere: We weren't?
RosietheRibbitor: Okay
BubblegumBitch: We're not even in the same room as each other but I can feel the tension between them!
momoyoro: There's no tension!
DefyingGravity: So you're not interested in her?
momoyoro: Definitely not
DefyingGravity: So you wouldn't mind if I wanted to flirt with her?
momoyoro: Why are you asking me?
DefyingGravity: Well, you and Jiro kind of act like girlfriends so I didn't want to encroach on your territory or anything
momoyoro: There's nothing going on with me and Jiro! She's not my girlfriend! She can talk to whoever she wants!
momoyoro has left Fuck Yeah! Class 1A! group chat
DefyingGravity: Was it something I said?
DekuDeku: I forgot that girls can be just as bad as guys sometimes
FuckOff: How do you forget that?
DekuDeku: Sometimes us guys are even more dramatic than they are
theROCK: He has a point
cellofame: Yeah it gets kind of ridiculous sometimes
Fire&Ice: Ditto
Chapter 5
Summary:
PurpleSon - Shinsou Hitoshi
LoudPapa - Present Mic
TiredDad - Aizawa
Notes:
For more content follow me at @loudblondeem
Chapter Text
Ohana Means Family
PurpleSon: Thank you for letting me take a week off for my mental health...I really needed it.
LoudPapa: Your mental health is important to us and to your success!
TiredDad: I don't care if you need to take time off
TiredDad: As long as you get whatever work you missed done you'll be fine
PurpleSon: I'll have Denki catch me up
TiredDad: What have I told you about loud blondes?!
LoudPapa: Zawa, be nice!
LoudPapa: This is Hitoshi's first crush!
TiredDad: I'm definitely not going to get any sleep now that there is two!
PurpleSon: To be fair @TiredDad you started it
PurpleSon: And we're just friends
TiredDad: That's what I said too and look how that turned out!
LoudPapa: Don't let him fool you! Zawa made the first move!
PurpleSon: I'm gonna leave before this gets weird
PurpleSon has left the Ohana Means Family group chat
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
BubblegumBitch: I will never fucking meal prep the daily chaotic search for food is my thrust in life arguably my sole purpose
cellofame: i don’t fidget because i’m anxious i fidget because i am filled with such raw chaotic power that if i didn’t let it out in small bits i would likely destroy an entire city that’s how powerful i am
ListenHere: is it so much for a girl to want to snuggle up with a girl on a couch with a cup of hot chocolate and cinnamon cookies in the middle of winter and watch a documentary about how people kill people
DefyingGravity: i had a mint kit kat today and honestly i've never felt a love like that
RosietheRibbitor: All I want for Christmas is Vine back
momoyoro: My mom was whisking the meringue for her banana pudding and said “stiff peaks!” And without thinking, I responded, “Ah yes, the porn parody of Twin Peaks”
Fire&Ice: Sunday brought to you by carbs
PikaPikaBitch: the time change slapped the gays so hard not even iced coffee can fix it
DekuDeku: WAIT! Why is no one investigating who keeps giving Charlie Brown rocks? That person should be arrested!
TENya: mikes hard battle with depression
FuckOff: getting candy is a bonus. trick or treating is about peering into peoples houses
theROCK: There are good cheese puns and bad cheese puns. Between them, there’s a gruyerea.
PurpleInsomniac: is this what the group chat has come to?!
PurpleInsomniac: I was only gone for a week!
Chapter 6
Notes:
For more content follow me at @loudblondeem
Chapter Text
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
PurpleInsomniac: I was gone one (1) week and this group chat has turned to shit
DekuDeku: Does that worry you?
PurpleInsomniac: honestly I thought it wouldn't take that long
momoyoro: More importantly…
momoyoro: WHERE THE FUCK WERE YOU?!
BubblegumBitch: In this addition of 'Where in the world was Shinsou Hitoshi'
ListenHere: I swear to god if you were in the one place we didn't look there will be hell to pay!
PurpleInsomniac: what was the one place you didn't look?
RosietheRibbitor: Your room…
RosietheRibbitor: But after the great group chat debacle of the year of our lord and savior All Might we steered away from it
DefyingGravity: But if you tell us that you were in your room some of us would win the bet
DekuDeku: Uraraka!
DekuDeku: We're not supposed to tell him!
FuckOff: Pipe down broccoli head! I have money riding on whether or not eye bags has been in his dorm this entire time!
DekuDeku: You too, Kacchan?!
PurpleInsomniac: so you guys were betting on me?
PikaPikaBitch: I WASN'T
PikaPikaBitch: I wasn't betting on you, Hitoshi!
PurpleInsomniac: that's probably because you have to have money to bet
PikaPikaBitch: Hitoshi!
cellofame: Well, I bet that you transferred homerooms
Fire&Ice: I too bet that you transferred to another homeroom to avoid Izuku
theROCK: I bet that you were off campus
DefyingGravity: Are we just going to ignore the fact that Todoroki calls Deku 'Izuku'?
BubblegumBitch: More like are we just going to ignore the fact that Denki calls Shinsou 'Hitoshi'?
TENya: Welcome back, Shinsou!
TENya: I hope your mental health sabbatical off campus was peaceful!
FuckOff: Why the fuck would eye bags take a week off for mental health?!
RosietheRibbitor: I mean it's barely been a month since Shinsou has joined Class 1A and we are kind of a handful
FuckOff: I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW THAT I AM A FUCKING DELIGHT!
ListenHere: You guys are missing the most important part
momoyoro: Which is?
ListenHere: Shinsou was off campus
theROCK: Fuck Yeah! Pay up bitches!
RosietheRibbitor: I wouldn't say that's the most IMPORTANT part
DefyingGravity: What's the most important part then?
RosietheRibbitor: Iida knew Shinsou was off campus on a mental health sabbatical the entire time!
ListenHere: Oh my fucking god!
ListenHere has left the Fuck Yeah! Class 1A! group chat
momoyoro: She's either going to strangle Iida or lock herself in her room and blast My Chemical Romance for an hour straight
BubblegumBitch: Can you hold her off on strangling Iida? I'm still popping my popcorn!
TENya: ASVGGDSSDGJIMFF
BubblegumBitch: Fuck! It's starting!
PikaPikaBitch: Mina just dead ass ran past me and Hitoshi in the common room leaving a trail of popcorn behind her
DekuDeku: Hitoshi and I
PikaPikaBitch: Now is not the time Midoriya!
PikaPikaBitch: Fuck! I just heard a scream!
PikaPikaBitch: Is Iida alright?
ListenHere: He'll live….
ListenHere: For now
PikaPikaBitch >>>> PurpleInsomniac
PikaPikaBitch: I'm glad you're feeling better, Hitoshi!
PikaPikaBitch: Life was boring without you!
PurpleInsomniac: You make life exciting enough
PikaPikaBitch: I mean sure but I need my favorite insomniac in my life!
PurpleInsomniac: I'm the only insomniac you know
PikaPikaBitch: Are you settling in okay?
PikaPikaBitch: I know the dorm beds are not as comfortable as the one's at home
PurpleInsomniac: are you asking because you're generally concerned or because you want an excuse to sneak out of your room and into mine?
PikaPikaBitch: I can't sleep!
PurpleInsomniac: and what? you think you're going to sleep in my room?
PikaPikaBitch: HITOSHI!
PurpleInsomniac: I didn't mean it like that
PikaPikaBitch: How did you mean it then?
PurpleInsomniac: well…
PurpleInsomniac: I have really soft blankets and there's enough room on my bed for you
PurpleInsomniac: would you perhaps wanna watch some American animation with me?
PikaPikaBitch: I'll be there in five!
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
Fire&Ice: Why did I just see Kaminari run past me in a Pikachu onesie?
Chapter Text
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
PurpleInsomniac: weird stuff has been happening to me all week
DefyingGravity: How do you mean?
BubblegumBitch: Yeah, do you mean UA weird or weird weird?
ListenHere: They have a point a lot of weird stuff happens here at UA
momoyoro: But if he's telling us then obviously it must be really fucking weird
RosietheRibbitor: God, can you imagine how weird of a week it must have been if it freaks Shinou out?
DefyingGravity: Tell us about your week, Shinsou!
PurpleInsomniac: first of all, I learned the hard way that aizawa isn't drinking coffee in those paper cups he brings to class its wine
PurpleInsomniac: second of all, I was at the store last night and I witnessed kirishima and the villain, dabi, run into each other in the hair dye aisle
PurpleInsomniac: third of all, I went to that cat cafe not too far away from campus (because I needed time to decompress while petting cats and drinking coffee) and I went to go pet one only to reach for the same cat as the villain, toga himiko, was reaching for
PurpleInsomniac: and fourth of all, I was taking a short cut down an alley and I'm pretty sure I walked past the villains, overhaul and shigaraki, fucking
ListenHere: That's a lot to unpack…
ListenHere: But I guess my first question is how did you learn the hard way Aizawa drinks wine instead of coffee in those cups?!
PurpleInsomniac: I just wanted to know what kind of coffee was keeping sensei from killing us every homeroom period so I stole a sip
BubblegumBitch: ADRIAN MICHAEL?!
RosietheRibbitor: Been watching those six-second american videos on YouTube again, Mina?
BubblegumBitch: I mean it's that or deal with whatever bullshit Bakusquad is up to
DefyingGravity: Are we going to ignore the fact that Kirishima dyes his hair?
BubblegumBitch: Oh, honey, Kiri has been dying his hair since forever!
DefyingGravity: You knew?!
BubblegumBitch: I've been Team Bakusquad since day one! I know all their secrets!
BubblegumBitch: Even some that might interest you, Shinsou!
momoyoro: So we're just going to ignore the fact that Dabi dyes his hair?
ListenHere: I mean as long as he's doing nothing devious with the hair dye, it's none of our business if he wants to color his hair
ListenHere: The real question is who in their right mind would let Toga into a cat cafe?!
RosietheRibbitor: If we're going by that logic then it shouldn't matter that Overhaul and Shigaraki is/was fucking in an alley
PurpleInsomniac: while that's true i didn't need to see that
BubblegumBitch: Aww, is little tosh tosh ma gosh traumatized?
PurpleInsomniac: tosh tosh ma gosh?
BubblegumBitch: That's the name your number is under on Denki's phone
BubblegumBitch: What name is his number under in your phone?
PurpleInsomniac: loud blonde #2
momoyoro: How many loud blondes do you know?
PurpleInsomniac: uh
RosietheRibbitor: He's probably talking about Monoma from Class 1B!
momoyoro: Now that you mention it
ListenHere: Makes sense
DefyingGravity: He's their Bakugou!
BubblegumBitch: Monoma huh?
PurpleInsomniac: yeah sure
Chapter Text
momoyoro >>>> ListenHere
momoyoro: Thank you for letting me wear your leather jacket!
ListenHere: It's no problem I like seeing you in my clothes
momoyoro: Really?
ListenHere: They look better on you then they do on me anyway
momoyoro: What's your favorite to see me in?
ListenHere: You look good in everything you wear
momoyoro: Oh, come on! You must like something better than the others!
ListenHere: That skirt I lent you last month
momoyoro: Which one?
ListenHere: Momo
momoyoro: Come on, Kyoka, tell me which one!
ListenHere: The short, dark purple one
momoyoro: Oh, you mean the really short one that shows off my legs?
ListenHere: …
ListenHere: Yes
momoyoro: Why that one?
ListenHere: Don't make me say it
momoyoro: Say what?
momoyoro: That it makes you want to lose control and ravish me?
ListenHere: Jesus fucking Christ, Momo, you can't say that kind of stuff I'm in the middle of a study session!
momoyoro: So you don't want to know what I'm wearing right now?
ListenHere: Tell me...please tell me!
momoyoro: One of those big t-shirts I sleep in…
ListenHere: Yeah
momoyoro: With nothing underneath it
ListenHere: Fuck
momoyoro: You like that?
ListenHere: You're lucky that I can't show you how much I like it
momoyoro: And why's that?
ListenHere: Because you'd be too sore to train tomorrow
momoyoro: Promises...promises
ListenHere: If you're going to be cheeky then maybe I should punish you instead of rewarding you
momoyoro: [momoshowinghernakedbodyunderneathhersleepshirt.jpeg]
ListenHere has left the chat
Unknown >>>> DefyingGravity
Unknown: You don't know me but I just wanted to say that you looked really good in pastel pink!
DefyingGravity: Thank you!
DefyingGravity: I rarely get to wear that outfit so it's nice to wear it every once in a while
Unknown: That's a shame...
Unknown: You're such a pretty girl you should be able to wear pretty things more often
DefyingGravity: You think I'm pretty?
Unknown: I think you're the prettiest girl in Musutafu!
PikaPikaBitch >>>> theROCK
PikaPikaBitch: [denkiinpurplemakeup.jpeg]
PikaPikaBitch: What do you think?
theROCK: It always amazes me how good at makeup you are
PikaPikaBitch: Chalk it up to a side effect of being friends with Mina
PikaPikaBitch: Now tell me what you think!
PikaPikaBitch: Is the makeup too much?
theROCK: Do you want my opinion as your friend or someone you slept with?
PikaPikaBitch: Ei
theROCK: Because as your friend I would say that he'd be stupid not to like it…
PikaPikaBitch: Eiji
theROCK: But as someone you've slept with I would say that you are the sun and I can't help but want to worship you
PikaPikaBitch: Eijirou!
PikaPikaBitch: We both agreed that we were better as friends!
theROCK: Yeah, but don't you miss being close sometimes?
PikaPikaBitch: You can't just say that stuff! You have Bakugou and I have Shinsou!
theROCK: You didn't answer the question
PikaPikaBitch: Ei
theROCK: Answer the question!
PikaPikaBitch: I can't
theROCK: Can't or won't?
PikaPikaBitch: Fuck you, Eijirou Kirishima!
PikaPikaBitch has left the chat
Chapter 9
Notes:
OneOfYourFrenchGirls - Aoyama
Chapter Text
PikaPikaBitch >>>> OneOfYourFrenchGirls
PikaPikaBitch: Aoyama, can I crash in your room for a few days?
OneOfYourFrenchGirls: Of course, mon cheri!
OneOfYourFrenchGirls: It's how they say mi casa es su casa!
PikaPikaBitch: You're a lifesaver!
OneOfYourFrenchGirls: Who are you hiding from this time?
PikaPikaBitch: I'm not hiding from anyone!
OneOfYourFrenchGirls: Okay, if not who then what are you hiding from?
PikaPikaBitch: Certainly not my problems!
OneOfYourFrenchGirls: Oh, mon cheri, are they that bad?
PikaPikaBitch: Uh….
PikaPikaBitch: No?
OneOfYourFrenchGirls: We may not be the closest of friends but Kaminari dear I can see right through you
PikaPikaBitch: I guess you could say my love life is kinda messy right now
OneOfYourFrenchGirls: Come now tell Aoyama the truth
PikaPikaBitch: I may have developed feelings for someone I've been spending time with while sorta kinda still having feelings for someone I used to spend time with
OneOfYourFrenchGirls: Oh
PikaPikaBitch: That's not what I was expecting you to say
OneOfYourFrenchGirls: You said messy but that doesn't sound messy to me
PikaPikaBitch: Person #2 wants to rekindle whatever we had but he's in a sort of relationship with someone else and I just want to see where a relationship with Person #1 could go however while I still have feelings for Person #2 that's my past and now I'm just confused!
OneOfYourFrenchGirls: Now I see the mess
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
Fire&Ice: How much do you guys wanna bet that Bakugou is gonna give us gift cards instead of actual presents again this year?
FuckOff: FUCK YOU, YOU STUPID CANDY CANE, NOT EVERYONE IS FUCKING LOADED!
Fire&Ice: First of all, I'm not rich my shitty father is!
Fire&Ice: Second of all, the only reason I go all out on birthdays and holidays is that in hope Enji asshat Todoroki will see his credit card bill at the end of each month and have a fucking heart attack or stroke or something
FuckOff: Sorry, I can't hear you over your mountain of daddy issues
RosietheRibbitor: I can't tell who won this round
DekuDeku: I like to think it was a tie
RosietheRibbitor: Fair enough
DefyingGravity: So does this mean that Bakugou is giving us gift cards or isn't giving us gift cards?
DekuDeku: With how much he was protesting I'd say he is giving us gift cards that and he's done it every Christmas since first year
RosietheRibbitor: I mean those Bath & Body gift cards he gives are lowkey great
DefyingGravity: He gives you a Bath & Body gift card?
RosietheRibbitor: Yeah, what does he give you?
DefyingGravity: A gift card to that cute boutique I like that is close to campus
DekuDeku: Huh
RosietheRibbitor: What does he give you?
DekuDeku: He's never given me a gift card Kacchan usually throws a crumpled up ten at me and calls it a day
DekuDeku: @Fire&Ice @PikaPikaBitch @theRock @momoyoro @BubblegumBitch @ListenHere @TENya @cellofame
DekuDeku: What does Kacchan give you guys?
DekuDeku: @PurpleInsomniac I would have added you but you're new
PurpleInsomniac: that's fair
Fire&Ice: Last year he gave me his dry cleaner bill after I "accidentally" spilled an entire bowl of chili on him
theROCK: I usually receive a gift certificate from this athletic store I frequent...it's really manly
momoyoro: Barnes & Noble
ListenHere: Hot Topic
cellofame: Hot Topic
BubblegumBitch: Hot Topic
TENya: I too receive a Barnes & Noble gift card
DekuDeku: @PikaPikaBitch what about you?
[...]
DekuDeku: Should I be worried that he's not responding?
ListenHere: He's most likely busy doing something in his dorm
PurpleInsomniac: Denki is not in his room
ListenHere: Excuse me?
PurpleInsomniac: I've gone to nap with him these last couple of days and he hasn't answered the door…maybe he's off-campus?
TENya: If he went off campus he would have to let or Aizawa know and as far as I know he hasn't left
cellofame: I saw him just yesterday hanging out with Aoyama and Monoma from 1B
theROCK: WHAT
PurpleInsomniac: WHAT
PurpleInsomniac: why am I saying what?
FuckOff: How the fuck are you so calm, eye bags?
PurpleInsomniac: first of all, the bags underneath my eyes are designer
PurpleInsomniac: why wouldn't I be calm?
FuckOff: Your boyfriend is hanging out with some asshole from 1B
PurpleInsomniac: he's not my boyfriend
FuckOff: Uh guys?
PurpleInsomniac: why should I have a problem with him hanging out with some asshole when he already hangs out with you
Fire&Ice: Shots fired
Chapter 10
Notes:
XeroxThis - Monoma
Chapter Text
ListenHere >>>> PikaPikaBitch
ListenHere: Are you going to the Christmas party the Monday before Christmas?
PikaPikaBitch: Of course, I will! Why wouldn't I?
ListenHere: You've been avoiding us for nearly a week!
PikaPikaBitch: No, I haven't!
ListenHere: You haven't been sleeping in your own room or blowing up the group chat like you usually do!!!
ListenHere: If that's not avoiding us then what would you call it?!
PikaPikaBitch: JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, KYOKA, I CAN'T BE FUNNY ALL THE TIME! SOMETIMES I NEED TO WORK ON MYSELF AND I CAN'T WORK ON MYSELF WHEN I'M ENTERTAINING ALL OF YOU!!!
ListenHere: Denki
PikaPikaBitch: I'll be at the party
XeroxThis >>>> PikaPikaBitch
XeroxThis: Kaminari
PikaPikaBitch: Monoma
XeroxThis: Aoyama is too polite to say this but I think it's time for you to go back to sleeping in your own room
PikaPikaBitch: It's only been a little under a week
XeroxThis: Yes and that's almost seven days since I got laid!
XeroxThis: Listen I know you have shit going on between you and those assholes in 1A but…
XeroxThis: Get Your Shit Together!
PikaPikaBitch: I'm trying!
XeroxThis: Not hard enough!
PikaPikaBitch: How is it that you become more of an asshole after you go a few days without getting laid?
XeroxThis: Seven!
XeroxThis: Seven Days!
PikaPikaBitch: Fine
XeroxThis: Good get your shit and get out!
PikaPikaBitch: Hey!
XeroxThis: I wanna get laid before we leave for Christmas break!
theROCK >>>> PikaPikaBitch
theROCK: Denki
PikaPikaBitch: Nope, not gonna do this!
PikaPikaBitch has left the chat
PurpleInsomniac >>>> PikaPikaBitch
PurpleInsomniac: you still like me right?
PikaPikaBitch: What do you mean "do I still like you"? Of course, I like you! What's not to like?
PurpleInsomniac: it's just that you've been avoiding me and I don't know thought you didn't like me anymore
PurpleInsomniac: because I know I can be a lot sometimes and my quirk doesn't help that
PurpleInsomniac: so it kind of made sense that you didn't want to be around me anymore
PikaPikaBitch: Oh my God! No!
PikaPikaBitch: Trust me when I say that it's me not you
PurpleInsomniac: so you don't want to be around me not because of me but because of your own reasons?
PikaPikaBitch: Fuck! That's not what I meant!
PurpleInsomniac: what did you mean?
PikaPikaBitch: What I'm trying to say is that I have issues and I need to figure them out so for the last week I've been taking an unofficial on-campus mental health week
PikaPikaBitch: But that doesn't mean I don't like you because I do I'm just trying to be a better person for you
PikaPikaBitch: So are we good?
PurpleInsomniac: as long as you accompany me to this Christmas party that's for sure going to be a disaster…yeah sure
PikaPikaBitch: Iida and Uraraka are planning it this year so it won't be that bad
PurpleInsomniac: we'll see
Chapter Text
theROCK >>>> PikaPikaBitch
theROCK: Denki, we need to talk
PikaPikaBitch has read this message
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
TENya: We should go around and say one good thing that's happened to us this year!
DefyingGravity: Such a good idea, Iida!
DefyingGravity: I'll go first!
DefyingGravity: A week or so ago, I started talking to this girl online and I think I really, really like her!
TENya: That is very good news, Uraraka!
TENya: I'll go next!
TENya: After talking with the doctors they agreed that it'd be okay if Tensei came home for the holidays!
DekuDeku: Awesome news, Iida!
DekuDeku: You too, Uraraka!
TENya: Thank you, Midoriya, it's been a long time since we were all together for the holidays!
DefyingGravity: We may not know each other as well but we're going to be exchanging presents through the mail!
DekuDeku: I guess I'll go next
DekuDeku: It didn't happen to me but someone who is close to me and seeing them happy makes me happy…does that count?
DefyingGravity: I think so…@TENya, thoughts?
TENya: I'll allow it
DekuDeku: Well, my mom has been seeing this guy he really makes her happy and that makes me happy!
RosietheRibbitor: My little brother and sister sent me a cute care package for my birthday and it made me cry!
PurpleInsomniac: I was moved to Class 1A and made a lot of friends
BubblegumBitch: Thanks to our weekly girl nights I have gotten to know my classmates better and made more friends!
cellofame: I had a spa day with my dad because he raised me on his own and he really deserved it
ListenHere: My mom and I performed for the first time together in front of an audience in a cafe
Fire&Ice: My siblings and I reconnected with my oldest brother who we haven't seen in a while and thought was dead he may go by a different name and look different but he's still Touya!
PikaPikaBitch: I'm glad I met and have Shinsou in my life!
theROCK: Denki…
PikaPikaBitch: I'M GLAD I MET AND HAVE SHINSOU IN MY LIFE!
theROCK: My moms renewed their vows and I got to be their flower boy
momoyoro: It was nice to be normal for a change and have a laid back Thanksgiving
FuckOff: I too received a care package but on December 1st from my parents with the snowflake sugar cookies my mom and I use to make and a blue sweater with white snowflakes that my dad knitted
DefyingGravity: Surprisingly Bakugou's was very tame
BubblegumBitch: Bakugou has a super secret layer called Soft Boi Bakugou!
cellofame: So…Mama Inko is dating now?
FuckOff: Fuck off, Tape Face!
PurpleInsomniac: username checks out
theROCK >>>> PikaPikaBitch
theROCK: You can't avoid me forever!
Chapter 12
Notes:
SleepySensei - Aizawa
Chapter Text
PikaPikaBitch >>>> SleepySensei
PikaPikaBitch: Hey, Aizawa-sensei, just a heads up I won't be returning to class after Christmas break but will be taking a week or two off for mental health reasons!
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
DekuDeku: You know with the way our class is I should have expected the Christmas party to be a garbage fire
RosietheRibbitor: I mean even by Class 1A standards that was…a lot
DekuDeku: Honestly...when did all that unresolved drama build up?
RosietheRibbitor: I couldn't tell you
RosietheRibbitor: But what I can tell you is the exact moment when the shit hit the fan
DekuDeku: When Kaminari ran into Kirishima?
RosietheRibbitor: When Kaminari ran into Kirishima!
DekuDeku: But you know what the worst part is?
RosietheRibbitor: What?
DekuDeku: How people took sides once they figured out what was going
RosietheRibbitor: Or how they didn't take any sides
DekuDeku: Shinsou and Mina
RosietheRibbitor: Did you see Kaminari's face when he realised that Shinsou and Mina didn't want to get in the middle of the whole thing?
DekuDeku: His expression was somewhere in between heart broken and as if he was just slapped
RosietheRibbitor: Though to be honest he did get a little manhandled by Bakugou
DekuDeku: I'm just glad Todoroki was there to put an end to it before it went any further
RosietheRibbitor: If there was anyone who understood why Kaminari was avoiding his feelings it would be Todoroki
DekuDeku: Not everyone handles their emotions the same way so just assuming that one person would work stuff out like another person is unfair
RosietheRibbitor: I'm not picking sides but I kinda understand why Kaminari did what he did
DekuDeku: How so?
RosietheRibbitor: When Kirishima expressed that he still had feelings for Kaminari despite ending things between them and being involved in whatever with Bakugou he should have respected Kaminari's decision to stay just friends
DekuDeku: True
DekuDeku: But you can't help who you have feelings for sometimes
RosietheRibbitor: Yeah, but I never imagine that half of our friends would turn on him
DekuDeku: It was like watching the Lord Of The Flies come to life
RosietheRibbitor: That just made me shiver
DekuDeku: Yeah but was I wrong?
RosietheRibbitor: No
RosietheRibbitor: I hate that book! Why did Present Mic even have us read it?
DekuDeku: Something about being "well read" and "American Literature"
RosietheRibbitor: I just hope everyone has a great Christmas break and we come back to a positive and drama free environment without having to get Aizawa involved
DekuDeku: Preach!
Chapter Text
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
RosietheRibbitor: You know when I said that I hoped that we'd come back to a positive and drama-free environment I didn't mean this!
DekuDeku: I got back to the dorms later than usual from Christmas break
DekuDeku: What's going on?
RosietheRibbitor: Where do I start?
DekuDeku: From the start preferably
RosietheRibbitor: Kaminari never came back
DekuDeku: um….what?
RosietheRibbitor: Everyone came back from Christmas break at a decent time (except for you but you already let everyone know you'd be visiting your mom two extra days) but it's been two days and Kaminari is nowhere to be seen!
DekuDeku: Are you the only one freaking out?
RosietheRibbitor: Considering how we left things at the Christmas party, more people should be!
RosietheRibbitor: Like I understand we have 2x as much homework and practice before Summer vacation comes around
RosietheRibbitor: But seriously, people! We've known him for almost five years!
DekuDeku: How did people react?
RosietheRibbitor: Where should I start? With those who rightly supported Kaminari and his feelings? Those who supported Kirishima and his misguided feelings? Or those fucking cowards who crushed Kaminari's heart?!
DekuDeku: Asui! Language!
RosietheRibbitor: Sorry, Midoriya, It just gets me so fired up!
RosietheRibbitor: Kaminari was clearly trying his best to deal with it and when the fight breaks out two of his closest friends just decide that his feelings don't matter!
DekuDeku: But to be fair Mina is friends with both Kaminari and Kirishima so it was a logical step to choose neither side
RosietheRibbitor: Then what about Shinsou?
DekuDeku: While technically Shinsou is not a part of either squads he could have chosen either side
RosietheRibbitor: And yet he didn't! He just froze up leaving our beloved zappy boy heartbroken!
DekuDeku: Oh shit! Asui said Kaminari rights!
RosietheRibbitor: FUCK YEAH! KAMINARI RIGHTS!
DekuDeku: Seriously though what are we going to do?
RosietheRibbitor: Maybe we should go to Aizawa-sensei?
DekuDeku: I thought you wanted to handle this without getting Sensei involved?
RosietheRibbitor: That was when I thought we were all mature enough to handle this
RosietheRibbitor: But obviously I was wrong
Chapter 14
Notes:
ALLMIGHT - All Might
Chapter Text
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
RosietheRibbitor: @DekuDeku you remember the plan right?
DekuDeku: Operation Calamari?
RosietheRibbitor: Operation Calamari!
DekuDeku: Remind me again what Operation Calamari is again
RosietheRibbitor: Operation Calamari is our plan to bring Kaminari back and put an end to all of this nonsense!
DekuDeku: And how do I fit into this?
RosietheRibbitor: You're going to talk to the idiots who took Kirishima's side or no side at all about getting their act together and about boundaries
RosietheRibbitor: While I talk to Aizawa-sensei about Kaminari's absence
DekuDeku: Why do you get to talk to Sensei?
RosietheRibbitor: Don't you think Aizawa would find it suspicious that the problem child is asking about a missing student?
DekuDeku: Fuck…you're right!
RosietheRibbitor: Operation Calamari on three?
DekuDeku: Hell yeah!
RosietheRibbitor: 1…
RosietheRibbitor: 2…
RosietheRibbitor: 3…
DekuDeku: Operation Calamari!
RosietheRibbitor: Operation Calamari!!!
DekuDeku >>>> ALLMIGHT
DekuDeku: I hope you're not busy but I was hoping you can help me out
ALLMIGHT: Ah, Young Midoriya, what seems to be the matter?
ALLMIGHT: And it's no problem I always have time for my favorite UA student!
DekuDeku: Well…you see there's been a little drama between some of my classmates
DekuDeku: Things have been tense hell one of my classmates didn't even come back from Christmas break
ALLMIGHT: That sounds quite serious
DekuDeku: It is
ALLMIGHT: I'm not sure this something I can help with maybe you should go to one of your teachers
DekuDeku: Asui Tsuyu is talking to Aizawa
ALLMIGHT: Asui Tsuyu?
DekuDeku: One of my classmates who favors her amphibian side
ALLMIGHT: Ah
DekuDeku: And I have to talk to those who participated in the drama
ALLMIGHT: The ol' get your head out of your ass talk huh?
DekuDeku: ALL MIGHT!
DekuDeku: Language!
DekuDeku: But yeah Asui figured it look suspicious if I went to talk to Aizawa about the missing student what with me being a problem child and what not
ALLMIGHT: That Asui girl sure knows what she's talking about
DekuDeku: Yeah she sure is smart
DekuDeku: So?
ALLMIGHT: So?
DekuDeku: What advice can you give me?
ALLMIGHT: Advice?
DekuDeku: Yes, advice!
DekuDeku: Because I have this unruly green hair, these big cheeks, and these freckles nobody will take my ol' get your head out of your ass talk seriously!
ALLMIGHT: That only means one thing!
DekuDeku: What's that?
ALLMIGHT: You need to show them you mean business, Young Midoriya!
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
DekuDeku: CLASS 1A! CLASS MEETING IN THE COMMON ROOM IN TEN MINUTES!
DekuDeku: AND IF ANY OF YOU DON'T SHOW UP SO HELP ME GOD!
DekuDeku: I'LL HUNT YOU DOWN! NO PLACE IN UA WILL BE SAFE!
Chapter 15
Notes:
Trying something different let me know what you think!
Chapter Text
Whenever Shinsou got whatever little sleep he could muster only lasts for a short period of time and is usually eventless but tonight was different.
The second his face hit his pillow after Shinsou returned to his dorm after dinner he was out and his surroundings mystically began to morph into somewhere that seemed familiar but he had never been there before, though not everything was unfamiliar to him standing in front of him wearing his hero costume and throwing a smirk at him was Denki.
"How could you, Hitoshi? I'm one of your closest friends and when I needed you the most you turned your back on me!"
"Denki-"
"No! You don't get to say my name like that!"
"Please…"
"Oh, you're begging now? Where were you when I begged you to say something at the Christmas party?!" The angry voice of Denki Kaminari yelled at him as the seemingly black void that had been surrounding them turned into the setting of the Christmas party everything was in the right placement of that scene down to the devastated look Denki had given him.
"Everything was happening so fast I didn't know what to do so I just froze!"
"I'M SICK OF YOUR EXCUSES! JUST SAY WHAT YOU MEAN YOU COWARD!"
"I'm not a coward."
"Only cowards lead people on and make them think you like them!"
"I'm not a coward!" The angry burst of Shinsou's voice left his mouth then began to bounce around the void as the background changed from the Christmas party and began to flip through every memory he had of Denki and every feeling the loud, blonde has ever made him feel suddenly Shinsou didn't feel anger anymore as a wave of remorse began to wash over him.
"Oh, Hitoshi, you are a coward and you'll never understand the pain and embarrassment you put me through!"
Shinsou…
Shinsou…
Shinsou…
"Shinsou! If you don't hurry up you'll miss dinner!"
Never before had Shinsou been thankful to hear Iida's voice snapping him out of that unsettling dream.
Chapter 16
Notes:
MouseGod - Nezu
OneOfYourFrenchGirls - Aoyama
Invisibitch - Hagakure
Chapter Text
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
Unknown has added Invisibitch, Birdman, GunShow, PourSomeSugarOnMe, KarateKid, CalloftheWild, and OneOfYourFrenchGirls to the Fuck Yeah! Class 1A! group chat
Unknown has changed their name to MouseGod
MouseGod: THIS YOUR PRINCIPAL, NEZU!!!
MouseGod: UA IS ON LOCKDOWN DUE TO THE VILLAIN ATTACK HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
MouseGod: DO NOT BE ALARMED!!!
MouseGod: STAY CALM AND REPORT TO AIZAWA OR PRESENT MIC!!!
MouseGod has left the group chat
PikaPikaBitch: jeSUS CHRIST I'M TRYING TO WATCH POKEMON FOR FUCK SAKE!!!!
PikaPikaBitch: WHY IS THE UNIVERSE AGAINST ME?!?!
ListenHere: The universe is not against you...the League of Villains is
ListenHere: Also welcome back!
PikaPikaBitch: OH WOAH IS ME!
PikaPikaBitch: also thanks, babe!
TENya: Kaminari!
TENya: Jiro!
TENya: You two should be making your way to Aizawa-sensei or Mic-sensei to check-in not chatting mindlessly away on the group chat!
ListenHere: Chill out, Iida, I'm on my way to Aizawa
PikaPikaBitch: Yeah, Iida, come chill out and watch Pokemon with me!
TENya: YOU HAVEN'T LEFT YOUR ROOM YET?!?!?!?!
PikaPikaBitch: Listen the league attacks us at least once a week the school it's not that big of a deal
TENya: IT'S SERIOUS THIS TIME!!!
PikaPikaBitch: Ok Boomer
TENya: AIZAWA MENTIONED THAT THEY THINK THE LEAGUE IS TRYING TO BURN DOWN THE DORMS!
PikaPikaBitch: Sure
TENya: KAMINARI! YOU LIVE IN THE DORMS!
PikaPikaBitch: Oh fuck!
PikaPikaBitch: My prized possessions!!!
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
Invisibitch: Okay, but when I pictured Kaminari showing up with his prized possessions I didn't think he'd show up with his Pikachu onesie and his ENTIRE nail polish collection!
OneOfYourFrenchGirls: His collection is almost as extensive as mine!
Invisibitch: I didn't even know that he painted his nails!
cellofame: Usually, nobody really looks at his hands when he short circuits himself and goes all "whey"
BubblegumBitch: It's actually kind of ridiculous
Invisibitch: How do you mean?
BubblegumBitch: We once had him go and buy snacks for the Bakusquad and he came back with said snacks and like three bottles of nail polish
Invisibitch: But does he always do that when he goes out?
BubblegumBitch: Like six times out of ten he does it
cellofame: Pretty much
Invisibitch: Does he do that with makeup?
Invisibitch: Because I have seen him with makeup on once
cellofame: Nail polish and skirts are a common occurrence but Denki has to be in the right headspace for makeup
Invisibitch: Oh…
Invisibitch: Wait…
Invisibitch: Skirts?
BubblegumBitch: Denki likes to dress feminine sometimes but he identifies as male
[...]
Invisibitch: Does he look cute in skirts?
BubblegumBitch: Oh girl, you have no idea!
Chapter 17
Notes:
Birdman - Tokoyami
Gunshow - Shouji
Chapter Text
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
PikaPikaBitch: Does it smell like henway in here?
FuckOff: What's a henway?
PikaPikaBitch: About ten pounds!!!!
FuckOff: GODDAMNIT, SPARKY!
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
PikaPikaBitch: Are those space pants?
DefyingGravity: What?
PikaPikaBitch: Because your ass is out of this world!
DefyingGravity: Kaminari it's four a.m.
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
PikaPikaBitch: Did it hurt when you fell?
Birdman: Kaminari?
Birdman: You know how Dark Shadow gets when I don't sleep!
[...]
Birdman: Fine…
Birdman: I'll bite
Birdman: Did it hurt when I fell from heaven?
PikaPikaBitch: No, from the vending machine!
Birdman: What?
PikaPikaBitch: Because you're a whole snack!
Birdman: I'm going to bed
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
PikaPikaBitch: Do you like raisins?
BubblegumBitch: Denki, honey, it's two a.m.
PikaPikaBitch: What about dates?
PikaPikaBitch: What about a date with me?
BubblegumBitch: Please, please, go to bed!
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
DekuDeku: Is it just me or is Kaminari sleeping less than usual?
DekuDeku: I mean besides the receipts seen in this chat
ListenHere: He's been sleeping more in class now that you mention
DekuDeku: @PurpleInsomniac how has he been acting around you?
PurpleInsomniac: uh
PurpleInsomniac: we're not exactly on speaking terms since the christmas party
BubblegumBitch: I mean he messaged me during his insomnia marathon but other than that he's avoided me like the plague
BubblegumBitch: Not that I blame him
PurpleInsomniac: same
theROCK: same
FuckOff: same
GunShow: @DekuDeku have you tried talking to that silver-haired dude from Class B?
DekuDeku: Tetsutetsu?
theROCK: He's been hanging around Class B?
GunShow: I mean every time I go to ask Tetsutetsu to lift with me he's there….
GunShow: So yes?
OneOfYourFrenchGirls: Neichan confirms that Kaminari has been hanging around Class B more than usual!
BubblegumBitch: Neichan?
cellofame: Neichan?
theROCK: Neichan?
DekuDeku: Neichan?
OneOfYourFrenchGirls: Oui, my boyfriend, Neichan!
FuckOff: What kind of name is Neichan?
OneOfYourFrenchGirls: What kind of name is Kacchan?
DekuDeku: He's got you there, Kacchan
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
Fire&Ice: Does anyone have bleach I can use to cleanse my eyes from the sin I have seen?
TENya: IF YOU FAVOR YOUR EYESIGHT DON'T POUR BLEACH ON YOUR EYES!!!
momoyoro: I have to side with Iida on this pouring bleach on your eyes can be detrimental to your health!
Fire&Ice: You wouldn't say that if you saw what I saw
momoyoro: What did you see?
Fire&Ice: Let's just say that I found out the hard way that Neichan is referring to Monoma Neito from Class B
momoyoro: The hard way?
momoyoro: OH
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
ListenHere: Good news everyone!
ListenHere: Kaminari has crashed and is currently sleeping on the couch in the common room
DekuDeku: Somewhere Iida just sighed in relief
TENya: I did
Chapter 18
Notes:
KarateKid - Ojiro
DaigothePurple - Shinsou Daigo (oc, Shinsou's oldest brother)
Chapter Text
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
KarateKid: Does Shinsou have any siblings?
DekuDeku: Hey, Ojiro!
DekuDeku: Um, I'm not sure why?
KarateKid: Hagakure and I went off campus yesterday and while we were out we went to that one cafe she likes
KarateKid: And sitting there enjoying their hot beverage was a man with purple hair and beard
Fire&Ice: Hmmm
DekuDeku: Todoroki!
DekuDeku: No!
DekuDeku: Ojiro, while I see your point you can't just assume that everyone with purple hair is related to Shinsou!
Fire&Ice: With that kind of logic then we may as well assume Mineta and Shinsou are related
Fire&Ice: But then again Shinsou's eye bags do look similar to those of Aizawa-sensei's
DekuDeku: Todoroki, I said no conspiracy theories!
KarateKid: That still doesn't answer my question
DekuDeku: Outside of the Dekusquad I don't know much about the personal life of the rest of my classmates
DekuDeku: Though since he probably is getting notifications from the group chat he'll answer if he wants us to know
KarateKid: That works for me
Fire&Ice: I'm going to need a bigger quark board and more red string
DekuDeku: Oh for the love of All Might
PurpleInsomniac >>>> DaigothePurple
PurpleInsomniac: what are you doing here?
DaigothePurple: Can't I check up on my baby brother?
PurpleInsomniac: im not a baby
PurpleInsomniac: im 16
PurpleInsomniac: im going to be a hero someday
DaigothePurple: I just wanted to see how you're doing, Hitochan, since that nice gay couple adopted you a few years ago
PurpleInsomniac: a few years?
PurpleInsomniac: try six years
DaigothePurple: I was barely eighteen I couldn't take care of myself let alone the nine of you
DaigothePurple: But I did the best I could after Father went to prison and Mother abandoned us
PurpleInsomniac: and yet we still ended up in foster care
DaigothePurple: That's not fare, Hitoshi
PurpleInsomniac: oh is it hitoshi now?
PurpleInsomniac: first it was hitochan now it's Hitoshi
PurpleInsomniac: make up your mind
DaigothePurple: I had hoped that this would be more pleasant
PurpleInsomniac: fucking sucks doesn't it?
DaigothePurple: I'll be in town for a few more days…
DaigothePurple: I hope we can get dinner or something before I leave
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
momoyoro: Not to be intrusive but Shinsou just stormed past me in the hallway and is now blasting very loud emo music
momoyoro: Jiro isn't here so I couldn't tell you what he's listening to
DekuDeku: On my way!
PikaPikaBitch: I'm on it!
Chapter Text
PurpleInsomniac >>>> PikaPikaBitch
PurpleInsomniac: hey, i know things have been…rocky between us but thanks for being there for me yesterday
PikaPikaBitch: Awww Shinsou!
PurpleInsomniac: hitoshi
PikaPikaBitch: What?
PurpleInsomniac: we know each other well enough to use first names
PurpleInsomniac: so please call me hitoshi
PikaPikaBitch: Hitoshi
PurpleInsomniac: Denki
PikaPikaBitch: I hope I didn't overstep any boundaries last night I just know that when I'm upset a soft blanket and some nice tea usually help a lot
PurpleInsomniac: it was nice
PikaPikaBitch: Was the tea okay? Usually, I drink sleepy time tea but I was out and the only tea I could find is Blasty's green tea!
PurpleInsomniac: Denki
PikaPikaBitch: How about the blanket burrito? I would've given you my Pikachu one but I need that one to sleep so I gave you the one with stars it's not as soft as my Pikachu one but I hope it worked!
PurpleInsomniac: Denki
PikaPikaBitch: I would have stayed longer but Tetsutetsu promised to help me with my math
PurpleInsomniac: DENKI
PikaPikaBitch: Yeah?
PurpleInsomniac: everything was perfect
[...]
PurpleInsomniac: are you still there?
PikaPikaBitch: Yeah, I'm still here
PurpleInsomniac: you went quiet on me
PikaPikaBitch: Sorry, I got kind of flustered
PurpleInsomniac: flustered?
PurpleInsomniac: are you talking to someone else while you're talking to me?
PikaPikaBitch: What? No!
PurpleInsomniac: but then how did you get flustered?
PikaPikaBitch: Hitoshi, honey, you make me flustered at least once a day
PurpleInsomniac: once a day?
PikaPikaBitch: At least
PurpleInsomniac: so you really like me like that?
PikaPikaBitch: Of course I like you! Why wouldn't I?
PurpleInsomniac: well…
PikaPikaBitch: Ever since I first met you I've been trying to show you that I really like you!
PurpleInsomniac: but you're pretty close with that tetsutetsu guy i don't want to mess that up
PikaPikaBitch: There's nothing between me and Tetsutetsu and there will never be anything between me and Tetsutetsu!
PikaPikaBitch: He's just some guy that helps me with my math and who I occasionally hang out with
PurpleInsomniac: am i just some guy?
PikaPikaBitch: No, you're my future
[...]
PikaPikaBitch: Hitoshi?
PikaPikaBitch: You went quiet on me
PurpleInsomniac: im your future?
PikaPikaBitch: I don't make tea and blanket burrito just anyone!
PikaPikaBitch: I mean…if you'll have me
PurpleInsomniac: you better take me to dinner and a movie for our first date!
PurpleInsomniac: im a lady!
PikaPikaBitch: A lady, huh? Does this mean I have to ask your Dads for permission?
PurpleInsomniac: no just when you ask for my hand in marriage
PikaPikaBitch: AJSGVXDGBIVCF
PikaPikaBitch: HITOSHI!
Chapter 20
Notes:
PourSomeSugarOnMe - Satou
Chapter Text
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
FuckOff: @PikaPikaBitch I usually don't give a fuck what you do or wear….
PikaPikaBitch: Usually?
theROCK: Usually?!
BubblegumBitch: Usually?!?
cellofame: Usually?!?!
FuckOff: BUT WHAT THE FUCK IS ON YOUR NAILS!?
PikaPikaBitch: Nail polish?
FuckOff: I know that, Dunce Face!
FuckOff: But what kind of fucking color is that?!
PikaPikaBitch: Green
FuckOff: Dunce Face…
FuckOff: Sparky…
FuckOff: THAT'S NOT GREEN THAT'S SOME NEON SHIT THAT ASTRONAUTS CAN SEE FROM SPACE!!!
cellofame: It's not that bad
theROCK: Nah it's that toxic ooze that turned those turtles into…TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES!
BubblegumBitch: Eh more like the radioactive substance that blinded Daredevil!
PikaPikaBitch: It's not funny you guys!
BubblegumBitch: You're not going to wear it on your date are you?
cellofame: DATE?!
theROCK: DATE?!
FuckOff: DATE?!
PikaPikaBitch: Oh would you look at the time!
PikaPikaBitch has left the group chat
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
BubblegumBitch: You know now that Denki and Shinsou got their shit together it would be the perfect time for @DekuDeku @FuckOff @ListenHere @momoyoro to also get their shit together!
DefyingGravity: Hi, yes? 911? I'd like to report a murder!
RosietheRibbitor: Savage Ashido!
TENya: AS YOUR CLASS PRESIDENT I MUST IMPLORE YOU NOT TO PRESSURE THOSE WHO ARE NOT READY TO GO PUBLIC WITH A RELATIONSHIP!!!
PourSomeSugarOnMe: I usually only lurk but I have to say that I agree with Iida
PourSomeSugarOnMe: It's like different people process feelings differently but different couples go different speeds
cellofame: Damn, our boy Satou here spitting wisdom!
BubblegumBitch: But I wanted to play matchmaker!
PourSomeSugarOnMe: If you want to play matchmaker so bad why don't you match yourself with a girlfriend, boyfriend, or datemate?!
DefyingGravity: Damn, who knew Satou was a secret sass master?!
cellofame: F in the chat to pay your respects to Mina!
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
Invisibitch: [shinsoukissingdenkigoodnight.jpeg]
Invisibitch: Who knew they would be so cute together?!
RosietheRibbitor: I mean it makes sense if you follow the theory
Fire&Ice: Theory?
DekuDeku: NO!
Invisibitch: What's your theory, Tsu?
RosietheRibbitor: Those who say they're not here to make friends the first year are the ones who have datemates now
Invisibitch: So basically Bakugou, Todoroki, and Shinsou?
Fire&Ice: I was so wrapped up in the Midoriya is All Might's secret love child / Shinsou is Aizawa's secret love child theory that I was blinded by my own ignorance!
Invisibitch: I think we broke Todoroki
Chapter 21
Notes:
CalloftheWild - Koda
Chapter Text
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
Invisibitch: men should have to legally disclose to you if they don’t eat pussy before you even start talking to them
Birdman: Stop giving the Body of Christ to ducks! All ducks are Satanists, everyone knows that!
Fire&Ice: There is a theory that house cats were never actually domesticated and that they’re just using us as a means of survival of the fittest.
TENya: Whenever someone tells me they’re doing keto, I can just hear their coronary arteries screaming with fear
BubblegumBitch: If you’re shaving above the knee, what are you trying to prove.
PikaPikaBitch: the biggest L of 2019 for me was in July when i accidentally posted my meat on my snapchat story and no one said anything for 7 hours
ListenHere: i can’t believe i accidentally watched a snuff film on tumblr when i was 14 and Cats (2019) is still the most fucked up thing i’ve ever seen
DekuDeku: Taking my anti-anxiety medication with a red bull just to feel something
FuckOff: You ever been in such a bad mood that you slap an apple right out of someone's mouth because they were chewing loudly?
momoyoro: Spewing the confidence of a woman who just remembered to put her reusable bags in the car and then also remembered to bring them into the store.
cellofame: mfs be tweeting ‘eat the rich’ but haven’t attended lecture in weeks. Bro u worried abt the wrong class struggle
CalloftheWild: stop calling your cat a “chonkyboi” it can no longer walk, its bones are aching, it is in pain, please take it to the vet.
DefyingGravity: You think ursulas eels are just idiot henchmen but they’re actually a well respected lawyer and paralegal how do you think she executes so many contracts
OneOfYourFrenchGirls: I went on a date with a guy and he told me he could tell I was interested in him because my pupils were dilated. which, first of all.......shut the fuck up and second of all it’s bc I’m on molly
theROCK: my therapist doesn't ask me how my week was anymore, she just asks how many baths I've taken and for how long did I sit in the tepid water disassociating
KarateKid: I’m 190 lbs of pure ass. This isn’t a joke I’m just stupid thicc and I’m sorry you can’t hang
RosietheRibbitor: Men make fun of women for believing in astrology but genuinely believe that they have never had a woman fake an orgasm with them, I have to laugh
PourSomeSugarOnMe: every night to relax, I climb into bed, watch a full season of the great british baking show and have panic attacks on behalf of every single contestant
GunShow: [after working out] i was promised endorphins this is bullshit
PurpleInsomniac: starting the shit posting a little early aren't we?
DekuDeku: It's Monday morning and we've run out of coffee
PurpleInsomniac: fair
Chapter Text
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
PurpleInsomniac: do you guys ever wonder what todoroki's future facial will look like?
PurpleInsomniac: i mean endeavor's beard is made up of flames because of his quirk right?
PurpleInsomniac: so that means….
PurpleInsomniac: left side = fire / right side = ice…todoroki's beard = half flames, half ice?
PikaPikaBitch: Hitoshi stealing Todobroki's conspiracy king title?
PikaPikaBitch: More likely than you think!
momoyoro: I politely refute that sentence
PikaPikaBitch: What?
ListenHere: She's saying you're wrong
PikaPikaBitch: Oh
momoyoro: If he's stealing a title then it would be Midoriya's captain logic title
ListenHere: Point 2655 Momo
ListenHere: Denki…still 0
PikaPikaBitch: HEY, I SHOULD HAVE AT LEAST A COUPLE POINTS!
ListenHere: My girl's hot and smart! What do you bring to the table?
PikaPikaBitch: Super awesome English skills! Of which I've used to help you out of a few tough spots concerning essays but since your "girl" is "hot and smart" she'll have no trouble helping you from now on!
ListenHere: Fine
PikaPikaBitch: Fine!
PikaPikaBitch: I look forward to reading your essay on Romeo & Juliet for Present Mic's class that's due tomorrow!
ListenHere: Wait…that's due tomorrow?!
PikaPikaBitch: Like I said I'm looking forward to reading it
ListenHere: Denki…
ListenHere: Babe…
ListenHere: Electric love of my life…
momoyoro: I thought I was the love of your life?
PikaPikaBitch: Have fun with that essay!
PurpleInsomniac: i still never got an answer
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
PurpleInsomniac: if todoroki grew a beard would it be half fire, half ice?
BubblegumBitch: The real question is his pubic hair half and half like his hair hair?
theROCK: I don't know about his pubic hair but his armpit hair isn't half and half
BubblegumBitch: Wait…it's not half white, half red?
cellofame: Nah, one side is white and the other is red
BubblegumBitch: And how would you know that HANTA MIDDLE NAME SERO?!
cellofame: Chill, I only know because all of us boys change in the same locker room.
theROCK: Todoroki is super manly! Not caring about how he looks!
cellofame: Todoroki more like Todobroki!
BubblegumBitch: Todobroki?
theROCK: Todobroki?!
cellofame: Yeah, it's the nickname Denki gave Todoroki!
FuckOff: WHY THE FUCK IS DUNCE FACE GIVING THAT ICYHOT BASTARD A NICKNAME?!?!
BubblegumBitch: I have to side with Bakubabe on this receiving a nickname from Denki is a strictly Bakusquad privilege!
cellofame: I think they've been hanging out since the whole Christmas Party Disaster of 2019
theROCK: Yeah?
BubblegumBitch: That makes sense if he's not with us he's usually hanging around Shinsou or doing something with Todoroki
cellofame: It makes sense that their friends if you think about it
FuckOff: WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?!?!
cellofame: Well…
cellofame: Denki is a soft boi, Todoroki is a soft boi
cellofame: It just makes sense that he hangs out with someone he can be soft with
FuckOff: HE DOESN'T NEED TO HANG AROUND THAT ASSHAT TO BE SOFT!!! IF HE WANTS TO BE SOFT HE CAN DO IT WHEN WE HANG OUT!!!
BubblegumBitch: Yeah! What Bakubabe said!
theROCK: Yeah!
cellofame: Really?
cellofame: Would you guys sit with him and drink tea while watching the rain?
BubblegumBitch: …
BubblegumBitch: no
cellofame: Todobroki would
cellofame: Would you guys go with him that that one place he likes and gushes over crystals?
FuckOff: Fuck no!
cellofame: Todobroki would
cellofame: Would you guys make flower crowns with him while listening to soft music?
theROCK: not really
cellofame: Todobroki would
theROCK: I think I get it
theROCK: Denki's all loud and noisy with us but sometimes he needs a slower pace so he got with Shinsou hangs out with Todoroki
[...]
PurpleInsomniac: i'm never getting answers am i?
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
DekuDeku: @PurpleInsomniac while Shoucchan's head and underarm hair are either red or white depending on which side it's on but his "happy trail" and pubic hair is red on the left and white on his right so hypothetically if he ever did grow facial hair his right side would be ice and his left side fire but since Shoucchan is so dead set on wanting nothing to do with his father albeit looking like him I doubt he'd ever grow one but growing his hair out is a definite possibility
PurpleInsomniac: thanks
PurpleInsomniac: was that a blurb from your notebook?
DekuDeku: Not my official notebook no
PurpleInsomniac: what happened to just having one notebook?
DekuDeku: Nothing you can prove
PurpleInsomniac: what's in your unofficial second notebook?
DekuDeku: Just random questions about people's quirks
PurpleInsomniac: like?
DekuDeku: Like if Shouccan was to fuck me would I get three-degree burns or frostbite?
PurpleInsomniac: what?!
DekuDeku: What?
PurpleInsomniac: i think i'm gonna go to bed
DekuDeku: Great idea!
Chapter Text
PikaPikaBitch >>>> Fire&Ice
PikaPikaBitch: Are you awake, Todobroki?
Fire&Ice: I was just finishing up some homework before the weekend
Fire&Ice: Why?
PikaPikaBitch: I just had an amazing idea for Saturday and I can't think of anyone better to do it with than you!
Fire&Ice: Why am I getting a bad feeling about this?
PikaPikaBitch: Oh come on, Todobroki, it doesn't involve the usual shenanigans that I get into with the Bakusquad!
PikaPikaBitch: I promise!
PikaPikaBitch: Besides it's not like you already had plans! Midoriya's has plans with All Might and Momo has a family thing!
Fire&Ice: It depends...what kind of outing were you thinking?
PikaPikaBitch: A SOFT BOY OUTING!!!
Fire&Ice: I think I'll pass
PikaPikaBitch: Todobroki!
PikaPikaBitch: Why?!
PikaPikaBitch: It's not as if you don't already do soft boy things with me!
PikaPikaBitch: …
PikaPikaBitch: Maybe you just don't want to be seen with me out in public
PikaPikaBitch: Because you have a reputation or whatever
Fire&Ice: What did you have in mind for your soft boy outing?
PikaPikaBitch: I KNEW YOU LOVED ME, TODOBROKI!!!
Fire&Ice: What about Shinsou?
PikaPikaBitch: What about him?
Fire&Ice: I don't want to say yes to the soft boy outing if you have stuff planned with him
PikaPikaBitch: No, silly! Shinsou is spending all Saturday training with Aizawa-sensei!
Fire&Ice: Oh okay
PikaPikaBitch: So do you wanna hear what I have in mind?
Fire&Ice: Sure
PikaPikaBitch: I'll give you a hint!
PikaPikaBitch: The theme of our first official soft boy outing is…RELAXATION!!!
Fire&Ice: That's it?
PikaPikaBitch: Well, if I started with that then you would have refused to even go!
Fire&Ice: Ugh
PikaPikaBitch: Come on, Todobroki!
Fire&Ice: Fine
PikaPikaBitch: Yay!!!
PikaPikaBitch: Dress in your best soft boy outfit and meet me in the common room tomorrow at 8 AM!!!
PikaPikaBitch >>>> Fire&Ice
PikaPikaBitch: I'm dressed and on my way to the common!
Fire&Ice: Okay, I've only been here for a little bit
[...]
PikaPikaBitch: Todobroki…
Fire&Ice: Yes?
PikaPikaBitch: What are you wearing?
Fire&Ice: You told me to wear my best soft boy outfit and that's what I'm doing
PikaPikaBitch: Todobroki…
PikaPikaBitch: Buddy…
PikaPikaBitch: Pal…
Fire&Ice: Yes?
PikaPikaBitch: Nothing about that outfit could be considered soft boy aesthetic!
Fire&Ice: …
Fire&Ice: What do you mean?
PikaPikaBitch: You're wearing a short sleeve dark blue button-up with black and white stripes, a leather belt, white pants, and leather loafers!
PikaPikaBitch: You don't look like a soft boy or that you're about to embark on a relaxing soft boy outing!
Fire&Ice: Well, what about your outfit?
PikaPikaBitch: What about it?
Fire&Ice: Is the yellow heart-shaped sunglasses and white choker necessary?
PikaPikaBitch: First of all, my outfit is perfect!
PikaPikaBitch: Second of all, yellow and white complement each other!
PikaPikaBitch: Third of all, wearing a choker stabilizes my quirk and you know that!
PikaPikaBitch: And fourth of all, you're wearing leather! We're going to be doing relaxing things not clubbing and shooting back long island ice tea's!
Fire&Ice: Yeah, well, your yellow heart-shaped sunglasses, white choker, large pastel yellow sweater, honey-yellow pants, and white shoes make you like you're in middle school!
PikaPikaBitch: Are you done arguing?
PikaPikaBitch: Because as fun as this little tit for tat is if we don't leave right now we won't make it to our first destination before the crowds come
Fire&Ice: Oh, Kaminari, you do other things besides arguing and short-circuiting yourself?
PikaPikaBitch: Very mature of you
PikaPikaBitch: Are you ready?
Fire&Ice: Yeah
Fire&Ice >>>> PikaPikaBitch
Fire&Ice: Kaminari
PikaPikaBitch: Yes?
Fire&Ice: Why are we walking up to a Hot Spring?
PikaPikaBitch: You have uncovered our first activity!
PikaPikaBitch: Taking a nice relaxing dip in a hot spring to relax your body and your mind for the rest of our outing!
Fire&Ice: Uhh…
PikaPikaBitch: Please don't leave, Todoroki-kun! My parents sent me passes for this hot spring and none of my other friends seem the type to actually enjoy a hot spring!
PikaPikaBitch: You seemed a bit stressed this past week so I thought you might enjoy it!
Fire&Ice: Thank you, Kaminari-kun!
PikaPikaBitch: It's no problem, Todobroki!
PikaPikaBitch: Just, please stop bowing!
PikaPikaBitch >>>> Fire&Ice
PikaPikaBitch: Are you almost done drying off?
PikaPikaBitch: There's this place I've been dying to check out!
PikaPikaBitch: Hitoshi says the mint hot chocolate and double chocolate chip muffins are to die for!
Fire&Ice: Mints disgusting
PikaPikaBitch: Hitoshi's obsessed with anything and everything mint but I don't mind it
PikaPikaBitch: Plus it makes his mouth taste minty when we make out
[...]
PikaPikaBitch: SHOUTO MIDDLE NAME TODOROKI!!!
Fire&Ice: What now?
PikaPikaBitch: You never told me your hair curls when it's wet!
PikaPikaBitch: It's so cute!
Fire&Ice: You were never supposed to know usually people only get their body from the chest down wet in a hot spring...but SOMEONE was feeling childish and had to splash me
Fire&Ice: I wonder who that could have been?
PikaPikaBitch: Less chit chat!
PikaPikaBitch: The cat cafe six blocks away closes early on the weekend!
Fire&Ice >>>> PikaPikaBitch
Fire&Ice: @PikaPikaBitch put away your wallet I'm paying for refreshments and possibly the adoption fee for Shouto Jr
PikaPikaBitch: Shouto Jr?
Fire&Ice: [picofcatwho'sfaceishalforangehalfblack.jpeg]
PikaPikaBitch: When did you meet that cutie?
Fire&Ice: When you used the cafe's facilities
PikaPikaBitch: I turn my back for a couple of minutes and you already started petting cats without me!
Fire&Ice: You were taking too long
PikaPikaBitch: IT'S NOT MY FAULT I HAD TO PEE!!!!!!
Fire&Ice: No, it's your incredibly small bladders fault
[...]
PikaPikaBitch: Hey! I was going to pay for that!
Fire&Ice: You covered the hot spring so I thought it'd only be fair to cover this
Fire&Ice: You know…to be fair
PikaPikaBitch: Aww! Such a gentleman!
PikaPikaBitch: But that means I'm going to have to pay for our Boba Tea's!
Fire&Ice: Boba Tea?
PikaPikaBitch: Yeah, there's this great Boba stand by the little park we're going to!
Fire&Ice: Okay
Fire&Ice >>>> PikaPikaBitch
PikaPikaBitch: Hey, I don't know if I said this already but uh thanks for spending the day with me
Fire&Ice: It's like you said earlier I would have just stayed cooped up in my dorm overthinking upcoming assignments
PikaPikaBitch: Yeah but I don't get many chances to do soft boy things so today really meant a lot to me
Fire&Ice: What do you mean?
PikaPikaBitch: Whenever I hang out with the Bakusquad everything is so chaotic and Bakugou pretty much calls the shots
Fire&Ice: What about Shinsou?
Fire&Ice: I'm sure things are pretty calm with him
PikaPikaBitch: They are and I'm sure he'd do anything I suggested but it wouldn't vibe right you know?
Fire&Ice: Because he would be doing it to please you not because he wanted to genuinely do it?
PikaPikaBitch: Right?!
PikaPikaBitch: Like one of the things I love about being around him is that he gives me a chance to catch my breath
PikaPikaBitch: One of the reasons why I like hanging around you is because our vibes match and you don't make me feel like I'm stupid for getting excited about something that interests me
Fire&Ice: Let them judge you. Let them misunderstand you. Let them gossip about you. Their opinions aren't your problem. You stay kind, committed to love and free in your authenticity. No matter what they say or do, don't doubt your self worth or the beauty of your truth. Just keep shining like you always do.
[...]
Fire&Ice: Kaminari? Are you still there?
PikaPikaBitch: Denki
Fire&Ice: Huh?
PikaPikaBitch: You just spent the day with me, said the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me and made me cry happy tears!
PikaPikaBitch: You have first name privileges!
PikaPikaBitch: So please call me Denki!
Fire&Ice: Only if you call me Shouto
PikaPikaBitch: Stay wherever you are I'm coming to give you hugs!
Fire&Ice: That's not necessary
PikaPikaBitch: You just made me cry happy tears and ruined my mascara you're going to get a fucking hug!
Chapter 24
Notes:
HandsyMcFace - Shigaraki
SmokeDaddy - Kurogiri
MyBlueEyes - Dabi/Todoroki Touya
KnockOffDeadpool - Twice
FifthTeenageNinjaTurtle - Spinner
BigSisMag - Magne
SassyChickenNugget - Hawks
PsyhcoBarbie - Toga
Chapter Text
Scrappy Doo Level Villains
SassyChickenNugget: @BigSisMag just a heads up Toga just barged into your room
BigSisMag: As long as she puts stuff back when she's done I really don't care
SassyChickenNugget: Really?
SmokeDaddy: It's a family thing though she won't do it to you because you're new so don't worry
MyBlueEyes: Don't lie to him!
MyBlueEyes: She'll do it even more because you're new so like watch out
SmokeDaddy: I was trying to make her sound less like a train wreck
MyBlueEyes: Fuck train wreck! She's a hurricane!
BigSisMag: Now you two stop that she's neither of those things she's just…really passionate about certain things
FifthTeenageNinjaTurtle: Do you guys remember when she first started getting into makeup?
KnockOffDeadpool: oh yeah her face was all orange and the lipstick was all over the place
MyBlueEyes: I don't think I ever saw Shig laugh so hard before
BigSisMag: Hey now that's not her fault my skin tone is darker than hers and nobody gets lipstick right the very first time!
FifthTeenageNinjaTurtle: At least she's gotten better at it
HandsyMcFace: Not as good as Mag
BigSisMag: That's not a fair comparison
BigSisMag: It's taken me years of experience to look this good and she's only been doing it a few years
SmokeDaddy: She's right, it's not fair to Toga she's barely seventeen and doesn't need that kind of negativity in her life
SmokeDaddy: Also, stop giving the new guy the wrong idea and come get your food dinners ready!
FifthTeenageNinjaTurtle: Pizza?
PsyhcoBarbie: For fuck's sake, Spinner!
PsyhcoBarbie: We had pizza last week!
SassyChickenNugget: You don't like pizza, Toga?
KnockOffDeadpool: here we go
MyBlueEyes: It has less to do with not liking it and more to do with not being able to use her knife on it
Chapter Text
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
PurpleInsomniac: how could you do this to me?
PikaPikaBitch: Calm down, Hitoshi
DekuDeku: What's going on?
PurpleInsomniac: that knock off, walmart brand pikachu wants me to calm down and ignore the fact that he betrayed me!
PikaPikaBitch: It's not that serious
PurpleInsomniac: not that serious?!?!
BubblegumBitch: I think Mom and Dad are fighting
DefyingGravity: I thought Iida and Momo were the mom and dad?
BubblegumBitch: They're Class 1A's mom and dad I'm talking about the Bakusquad
theROCK: I thought me and Bakubabe were the mom and dad?
FuckOff: Fuck off with that mom and dad shit!
BubblegumBitch: Okay, they're the bubbly mom and reluctant dad of the Bakusquad but like Shinsou and Denki are the mom and dad of us crackheads
BubblegumBitch: Right, Sero?
cellofame: Yell heah!
ListenHere: I can see that
ListenHere: Shinsou is the sleep-deprived mom and Kaminari is the flashy, eccentric dad
DekuDeku: Guys, we're getting off-topic!
RosietheRibbitor: Yeah, what's going on @PurpleInsomniac @PikaPikaBitch?
PikaPikaBitch: Me and Hitoshi were talking last night
TENya: Hitoshi and I
DekuDeku: Not the time, Iida
TENya: You're right, I apologize
PurpleInsomniac: and that off-brand pokemon revealed some important and controversial information!
PikaPikaBitch: You are overreacting
PurpleInsomniac: and i have every right to be!!!
DekuDeku: Okay, Shinsou, why don't you take a deep breath and just tell us what Kaminari said
PurpleInsomniac: we were talking about teachers at UA that we liked
PurpleInsomniac: i, of course, said that Aizawa was the best teacher like the loyal student i am
PurpleInsomniac: but that treacherous pikachu, Kaminari, said that he didn't like Aizawa and that Sensei wasn't even at the top of his list of his favorite teachers!!!
BubblegumBitch: Wtf?
DefyingGravity: What?
theROCK: That doesn't sound manly
FuckOff: WHAT THE FUCK, SPARKY?!?!
cellofame: Huh?
ListenHere: Yeah, what the fuck?
TENya: THAT IS VERY UNHEROIC, KAMINARI!!!
DekuDeku: Lower your pitchforks, you guys, it's not very Plus Ultra of you to turn on Kaminari without hearing his side
RosietheRibbitor: Yeah, maybe Shinsou really is overreacting
DekuDeku: Kaminari, why don't you tell us what you said
PikaPikaBitch: When he asked me who my favorite teachers were I thought he genuinely wanted to know but if I knew he was going to act like this then I wouldn't have told him
DekuDeku: What was your answer?
PikaPikaBitch: I said Yamada-sensei and Sekijiro-sensei
RosietheRibbitor: I didn't know you knew Present Mic and Vlad King personally
PikaPikaBitch: I didn't actually get to know them until the end of first-year
DefyingGravity: Okay, but what makes them better than Aizawa-sensei?
PikaPikaBitch: I never said that they were better than Aizawa
PikaPikaBitch: It's just that unlike you guys I don't have a connection with him and it's not because I hate him (which I don't) it's because unlike some of you guys he never took interest in my grades or took me under his wing as a mentor
PikaPikaBitch: While Yamada-sensei, on the other hand, has inspired me to do better on my writing assignments and sometimes we discuss books we both read
PikaPikaBitch: Me and Sekijiro-sensei have a similar relationship to the one Midoriya and All Might have except it's less training me and more of being a parental figure since my parents haven't been in the picture since I came out
FuckOff: THOSE FUCKERS ABANDONED YOU BECAUSE YOU'RE GAY?!?!
DekuDeku: Please don't yell in the chat, Kacchan
FuckOff: I WILL DO WHATEVER I WANT!!!
PikaPikaBitch: I'm not gay I'm bi
PikaPikaBitch: But that's not why they're no longer in the picture
PikaPikaBitch: You see they never cared that I liked both guys and girls but they did seem to care that I sometimes wear cutesy stuff
BubblegumBitch: Those assholes don't talk to you anymore because you like to wear skirts and stuff sometimes?!
OneOfYourFrenchGirls: I hate to be one to intrude, mon cherie, but as someone who was raised in a country where gender norms are more relaxed and then moving here I am quite appalled
ListenHere: Yeah, that's fucked up, clothes have no gender!
DekuDeku: Guys, let Kaminari tell the rest of his story!
PikaPikaBitch: Anyway right around the time I figured out that I liked wearing cutesy stuff and my parents kicked me out I ran into Sekijiro-sensei at the mall while I was buying some stuff and instead of being repulsed he gave me the pep talk of the decade and even helped me pick some stuff out now he's my legal guardian and I stay at his place on the weekends and on holidays!
cellofame: Vlad King more like Dad King!
FuckOff: GODDAMNIT, TAPE FACE!!!
PurpleInsomniac: now i feel like an asshole for overreacting
PikaPikaBitch: That's okay, Hitoshi, I too overreact sometimes it happens to the best of us
Chapter 26
Notes:
ZappySon - Kaminari
BuffDad - Vlad King
Chapter Text
Fam™
BuffDad: Denchan, did you take Jeremiah out for a walk?
ZappySon: I have been living with you for almost two years it's been a force of habit, so yes, I took Jeremiah out for his walk
BuffDad: Did you let him sniff that fire hydrant a block away?
ZappySon: Said fire hydrant was thoroughly sniffed
BuffDad: Did you wash his paws off after the walk?
ZappySon: Those paws were so clean that you could eat off them!
BuffDad: Did you sing to him while drying him off?
ZappySon: I 100% sang an off-key "Jeremiah was a bulldog" to him while drying his paws
BuffDad: Did you give him a forehead kiss after you were done?
ZappySon: Yes, I gave the little cutie a forehead kiss after I was done!
BuffDad: You realize why I do this don't you?
ZappySon: To teach me responsibility?
BuffDad: No, I did that when I house trained you
ZappySon: HEY!
ZappySon: I'm housebroken!
BuffDad: Yeah, now that I can leave you home and not worry you'll burn my apartment down
ZappySon: Oh, so you have jokes now, Sekijiro-sensei?
BuffDad: You know what they say…you can't be Plus Ultra if you don't have a sense of humor!
BuffDad: But seriously you know why right?
ZappySon: You've told me the story a million times!
ZappySon: When Jeremiah was still a puppy you rescued him from some bad owners and to get him to trust you, you sang "Jeremiah is a bulldog" and gave him forehead kisses
BuffDad: And I insist on you doing it too so that you and Jeremiah can also form a bond!
ZappySon: You don't need to worry I think Jeremiah has liked me since the first time I gave him tummy rubs
BuffDad: So you know he appreciates it every time you bathe him and you don't electrocute him
ZappySon: And hurt the little cutie?
ZappySon: I would never!
BuffDad: While we're on the topic he would also appreciate it if you would also stop coming home smelling like cats
ZappySon: That's not fair! I guess that's the last time I sneak him any of my food
BuffDad: (Jeremiah voice) Noooo! I need those scrapes or I'll waste away to nothing!
ZappySon: If anything you could stand to lose a couple of pounds! Didn't the vet say you were a little bit overweight and that you needed to exercise more?
BuffDad: (Jeremiah voice) Lies!
BuffDad: What's he doing right now?
ZappySon: [picofJeremiahcuddlingwithDenkiastheywatchtv.jpeg]
BuffDad: Aww! I miss the little guy!
ZappySon: Aren't you supposed to be out having drinks with Aizawa, Yamada-sensei, and Midnight?
BuffDad: That doesn't mean I can't miss my boys!
ZappySon: Go! Socialize with other adults!
BuffDad: Fine! But both of you are getting hugs and forehead kisses when I get back!
Chapter Text
DekuDeku >>>> Fire&Ice
DekuDeku: Shoucchan?
DekuDeku: Are you wearing a skirt?
Fire&Ice: Yeah, why?
Fire&Ice: Do you not like it?
DekuDeku: No no no no no no
DekuDeku: That's not what I'm saying
DekuDeku: It's just….you're so pretty
[...]
DekuDeku: Shoucchan, are you still there?
Fire&Ice: You think I'm pretty?
DekuDeku: Shoucchan….
DekuDeku: Since the first day I saw you I have always thought you are the prettiest boy I have ever seen!
Fire&Ice: Yeah?
DekuDeku: There are many, many words in the world that mean pretty and none of them describe just how pretty you are
Fire&Ice: Then I guess you will just have to show me
DekuDeku: Gods, Shouto, you don't know how badly I want to
Fire&Ice: Oh, really?
DekuDeku: I mean we never really discussed how far we want to go past holding hands and kissing I don't want to push you
Fire&Ice: Izuku
DekuDeku: Yes?
Fire&Ice: Tell me how you would show me
DekuDeku: I would write poetry and make art dedicated to your beauty
Fire&Ice: Would you touch me?
DekuDeku: Anywhere you wanted!
Fire&Ice: What if I wanted you to get down on your knees and worship me?
DekuDeku: I would worship your long ivory legs with my lips
Fire&Ice: And elsewhere?
DekuDeku: After I'm done with your legs I would leave my mouth open for you to use as you see fit
Fire&Ice: And if I want to fuck your pretty mouth?
DekuDeku: I would enjoy every minute of it
Fire&Ice: I bet you would be a good boy and make the most sinful noises
DekuDeku: Only for you
Fire&Ice: I wouldn't last long your mouth would be so warm that I would cum down your throat
DekuDeku: I would take anything you give me
Fire&Ice: What if I wanted you to fuck me?
DekuDeku: Please Shoucchan
Fire&Ice: Oh, it's Shoucchan now?
DekuDeku: Don't tease me
Fire&Ice: But Izuku don't you want to see me ride your cock?
Fire&Ice: I just know you would stretch me so good
Fire&Ice: Your big strong hands gripping my hips as I slide up and down on your dick
Fire&Ice: I would make the prettiest sounds for you
DekuDeku: Fuck, Shouto
Fire&Ice: Oh yes, Izuku, say my name
DekuDeku: Shouto
Fire&Ice: I would stretch it out as long as possible
Fire&Ice: A long, hard fuck late one night when it's just us in the dorms
DekuDeku: So possessive
Fire&Ice: I will mark you up like the slut you are
DekuDeku: God yes sink your teeth into me
Fire&Ice: You're such a glutton for pain
DekuDeku: Only for you
DekuDeku: I live to worship you
Fire&Ice: And after I get your load I'll turn you around and ravish you
DekuDeku: You'll fill me up so good
Fire&Ice: After I'm done with you you'll want no one else
DekuDeku: Then you better collar me
Fire&Ice: You want a pretty collar for your pretty neck?
DekuDeku: So people will know that I belong to you
Fire&Ice: Baby boy, when I get done with you, you won't need a collar to tell people your mine
Chapter Text
PurpleInsomniac >>>> PikaPikaBitch
PurpleInsomniac: denki, are you still spending the night?
PikaPikaBitch: Aww has little tosh tosh ma gosh missed me?
PurpleInsomniac: you know what?
PurpleInsomniac: nevermind
PikaPikaBitch: Oh come on, Hitoshi, it's not like you don't call me by any cute nickname
PurpleInsomniac: kitten isn't a cute nickname it's what i call during sexy times
PikaPikaBitch: Do you want me to call you something during sexy times?
PurpleInsomniac: as long as it's not that tosh tosh ma gosh bullshit
PikaPikaBitch: What about Daddy?
PurpleInsomniac: fuck no
PikaPikaBitch: You're right
PikaPikaBitch: It would get pretty confusing if I called you Daddy when I'm the one fucking you
PurpleInsomniac: DENKI KAMINARI
PikaPikaBitch: What?
PikaPikaBitch: Sometimes bottoming is nothing to be ashamed of
PikaPikaBitch: I mean look at Bakugou he's a bottom all of the time and does just fine
PikaPikaBitch: But if you don't want to bottom anymore I'll understand
PurpleInsomniac: NO
PikaPikaBitch: What was that?
PurpleInsomniac: nothing
PurpleInsomniac: if you wanna keep topping me then i guess we can keep doing that
PikaPikaBitch: Oh really?
PurpleInsomniac: yeah if you want
PikaPikaBitch: Okay…coffeebean
PurpleInsomniac: eh
PikaPikaBitch: Too much?
PurpleInsomniac: it's cute but i don't think it's good sexy times nickname
PikaPikaBitch: Gotcha…
PikaPikaBitch: Moonbeam
PurpleInsomniac: too weird
PikaPikaBitch: Tigerlily
PurpleInsomniac: too flowery
PikaPikaBitch: Kitty Cat
PurpleInsomniac: too close to kitten
PurpleInsomniac: and that's my thing back off
PikaPikaBitch: Okay, Princess
[…]
PikaPikaBitch: OH MY GOD!!!
PurpleInsomniac: it's not that big of a deal
PikaPikaBitch: It kind of is
PurpleInsomniac: how?
PikaPikaBitch: I mean you got excited when I reacted to you first calling me Kitten right?
PurpleInsomniac: eh internally
PikaPikaBitch: Fine, internally, whatever
PikaPikaBitch: But you got excited right?
PurpleInsomniac: yeah
PikaPikaBitch: This so great!
PurpleInsomniac: i guess
PikaPikaBitch: What's wrong, Princess?
PurpleInsomniac: stop that
PikaPikaBitch: Stop what?
PurpleInsomniac: calling me princess
PikaPikaBitch: I thought you liked it?
PurpleInsomniac: it doesn't matter
PurpleInsomniac: i can't be blushing every time you call me that
PikaPikaBitch: But I like it when you blush
PurpleInsomniac: you do?
PikaPikaBitch: Yeah
PikaPikaBitch: Your cheeks get pink and for a split second you get all soft
PikaPikaBitch: Especially during sexy times
PurpleInsomniac: oh really?
PikaPikaBitch: Really!
PikaPikaBitch: I love taking you apart!
PurpleInsomniac: who would have thought bratty little bottom kaminari denki would also make a good top
PikaPikaBitch: You can be sassy all you want but at the end of the day you're moaning my name, Princess!
PurpleInsomniac: yes sir
PikaPikaBitch: That's what I like to hear!
Chapter Text
GirlsGirlsGirls
RosietheRibbitor: I love the class group chat I really do but sometimes I just need five minutes of peace and quiet in a girls-only space
BubblegumBitch: Oh girl I know what you mean! Sometimes you just want to take your bra off and let your hair down!
momoyoro: A girls-only group does have certain advantages
ListenHere: Like watch the movies we want to watch
DefyingGravity: I really don't mind boys it's just sometimes they get too much to handle and it's to have a breather once in a while
Invisibitch: ^^
Invisibitch: That and all the inappropriate questions
momoyoro: Have people been asking you inappropriate questions?
ListenHere: Tell me some names and I'll cut a bitch!
BubblegumBitch: We got your back, Hagakure!
Invisibitch: Nobody has asked me anything since I started going to school here but in middle school it was embarrassing
DefyingGravity: If you ever need to talk I'm always available!
RosietheRibbitor: Same
BubblegumBitch: Same
ListenHere: Same
momoyoro: Same
Invisibitch: Thanks, you guys!
RosietheRibbitor: I would offer to make tonight a girls night but my parents are out of town for the weekend and I have to watch my brother and sister
DefyingGravity: I totally understand my dad is taking me camping!
momoyoro: I have to go to a charity event with my parents
Invisibitch: I'm going to my cousins baby shower
ListenHere: My dad and I are going to watch my mom perform in Tokyo
BubblegumBitch: My parents aren't going to be home this weekend so I have nothing to do this weekend
BubblegumBitch: I guess I'm just going to stay at the dorms and maybe clean, do laundry, and finish whatever unfinished homework I have laying around?
DefyingGravity: Why did you add the question mark?
BubblegumBitch: Because I'm debating whether I'm going to do it Saturday like a responsible person or wait until the last possible moment
ListenHere: We all know which one she's going to do
momoyoro: Now wait a minute you don't know that for sure
DefyingGravity: I mean it's really a 50/50 chance
RosietheRibbitor: Is it really though?
RosietheRibbitor: Because the way I'm seeing it it's 90/10 if anything
Invisibitch: I don't think it matters because what truly matters is that she has a good time!
BubblegumBitch: If there's one thing that we all can agree on is that Hagakure is a national treasure!
momoyoro: You truly are a wild card, Ashido
DefyingGravity: What's that supposed to mean?
momoyoro: Nothing malicious
momoyoro: It's just that I'm so used to Ashido's "crack head energy" as she likes to put it that I forget she has a soft side
ListenHere: I get that
BubblegumBitch: It's because I hang out with the Backusquad so much
Chapter 30
Notes:
PsychoBarbie - Toga
SmokeDaddy - Kurogiri
SassyChickenNugget - Hawks
FifthTeenageNinjaTurtle - Spinner
HandsyMcFace - Shigaraki
Chapter Text
Scrappy Doo Level Villains
PsyhcoBarbie: GUYS!!!
PsyhcoBarbie: YOU'LL NEVER GUESS WHAT I JUST SAW!!!
SmokeDaddy: I hope it's the clock because it's thrEE IN THE MORNING WHY ARE YOU SPAMMING THE GROUP CHAT?!?!
SassyChickenNugget: I was dreaming of swimming in a pool of chicken nuggets, what's going on?
FifthTeenageNinjaTurtle: Oya?
FifthTeenageNinjaTurtle: Oya Oya!
FifthTeenageNinjaTurtle: Oya Oya Oya broha's just checking in from a late-night pizza run what's going?
PsyhcoBarbie: I WAS GETTING UP FOR A GLASS OF WATER
PsyhcoBarbie: AND I PASSED BY THE COUCH ON MY WAY TO THE KITCHEN
SassyChickenNugget: As one does
SmokeDaddy: For the love of all for one why are you writing in all caps?
FifthTeenageNinjaTurtle: Shhhh!
FifthTeenageNinjaTurtle: She's telling a story!
SmokeDaddy: My roommates are children
PsyhcoBarbie: ANYWAY!
PsyhcoBarbie: I WAS PASSING BY THE COUCH AND SAW THAT DABI WAS LAYING THERE PASSED AS USUAL
PsyhcoBarbie: BUT SOMETHING CAUGHT MY EYE!
SassyChickenNugget: Spill the tea sis!
FifthTeenageNinjaTurtle: What'd you see girl?!
SmokeDaddy: Are we really surprised something caught her eye?
SmokeDaddy: I mean a five-minute walk takes her twenty because she gets sidetracked by every shiny thing she sees
SassyChickenNugget: Stop raining on our parade, Smoke Daddy!
SmokeDaddy: I regret letting Toga pick our group chat names
SassyChickenNugget: Sure you do...Daddy
SmokeDaddy: What caught your eye, Toga?
PsyhcoBarbie: AS WE ALL KNOW DABI WEARS BLACK AND NOTHING BUT BLACK
PsyhcoBarbie: SO IMAGINE MY SURPRISE WHEN I SAW SOME COLOR ON HIM
PsyhcoBarbie: I TIPTOED CLOSER TO GET A CLOSER LOOK ONLY TO BE SHOCKED AT MY DISCOVER
PsyhcoBarbie: YOU KNOW…
PsyhcoBarbie: TO PHOTOGRAPH EVIDENCE THAT OUR RESIDENT DEPRESSED GOBLIN NIGHTMARE BOY ISN'T AS EDGY AS HE CLAIMS TO BE
FifthTeenageNinjaTurtle: It's not like he's hiding secrets from us or something
PsyhcoBarbie: ...
SassyChickenNugget: Hold the press!
SmokeDaddy: That's not how that phrase goes
SassyChickenNugget: Is our little Charmander keeping secrets from us?!
SassyChickenNugget: Scandalous!
PsyhcoBarbie: APPARENTLY
PsyhcoBarbie: BLACK ISN'T HIS NATURAL HAIR COLOR
PsyhcoBarbie: BECAUSE I SAW HIS ROOTS UP CLOSE AND PERSONAL!!!!!
FifthTeenageNinjaTurtle: WHAT
SassyChickenNugget: WHAT
SmokeDaddy: Oh that
FifthTeenageNinjaTurtle: What do you mean "oh that"?
SmokeDaddy: You honestly think I wouldn't notice when the league's credit card goes missing and a box of cheap hair dye magically appears the next morning in our bathrooms garbage?
SassyChickenNugget: Why haven't you ever said anything before?
SmokeDaddy: Listen, he came to us with black hair and has since kept it black
SmokeDaddy: Everyone has secrets as long as it doesn't endanger the league he can keep his secret
PsyhcoBarbie: YEAH BUT HIS LITTLE RED ROOTS ARE SOOO CUTE!!!
FifthTeenageNinjaTurtle: Drop those pics girl!
SassyChickenNugget: fire quirk = red hair?
FifthTeenageNinjaTurtle: But his fire is blue!
FifthTeenageNinjaTurtle: That's why Toga gave him the handle My Blue Eyes!
SassyChickenNugget: Really? I thought it was because he has blue eyes
SmokeDaddy: I'm going back to bed
PsyhcoBarbie: IT'S NEITHER OF THOSE ITS A REFERENCE TO A YOUTUBE VIDEO I SAW ABOUT WET CEMENT RAINING DOWN ON SOMEONES POKEMON CARDS AND SOME NERD SACRIFICES HIMSELF BY THROWING HIMSELF ON HIS CARDS SCREAMING "MY BLUE EYES!"
SassyChickenNugget: Oh so it's a pokemon reference?
HandsyMcFace: IT'S THREE FUCKING THIRTY IN THE MORNING!
SassyChickenNugget: Uh oh, gotta blast!
Chapter Text
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
MouseGod: ATTENTION ALL STUDENTS!!!
MouseGod: ALL REMANING CLASSES FOR THE WEEK ARE CANCELLED DUE TO UA BEING SNOWED IN!!!
MouseGod: FOR YOUR SAFETY PLEASE STAY INSIDE AND KEEP WARM!!!
MouseGod has left the Fuck Yeah! Class 1A! group chat
Fire&Ice: The cold never bothered me anyway
FuckOff: GODDAMNIT!!!
FuckOff: WHO SHOWED ICEY HOT FROZEN?!?!
PurpleInsomniac: you know what they say
PurpleInsomniac: into the unknown and whatever
FuckOff: WHO SHOWED THE DEPRESSED NIGHTMARE GOBLIN BOY FROZEN?!?!
PikaPikaBitch: Yeah, you know what they say Bakubro
PikaPikaBitch: Let it go
FuckOff: ANFHDUDHDHDUJZNXHCHB
cellofame: That's one ugly key smash
theROCK: Guys! I think we broke Bakugou!
DefyingGravity: Does Bakugou not like Disney?
DekuDeku: I mean, I remember watching like Mulan with him but you know
BubblegumBitch: Of course, he liked Mulan it has violence in it
theROCK: I think he likes Hunch Back of Notre Dam too?
DefyingGravity: But it doesn't have any violence in it?
PurpleInsomniac: are you fucking kidding me?
DefyingGravity: What?
PurpleInsomniac: what about all that sword fighting? and the shit that that bastard frollo did to quasimodo's mother?!
RosietheRibbitor: I didn't know you were a Disney fan, Shinsou
PikaPikaBitch: Oh yeah!
PikaPikaBitch: Most of Toshi's movie collection is Disney!
Fire&Ice: While most of American animation is lacking some of it is good i.e. Disney and Digimon
ListenHere: Stop the presses!
ListenHere: You like Digimon, Todoroki?
Fire&Ice: It was one of the few shows I could watch in secret without Endeavour knowing
DekuDeku: FUCK ENDEAVOUR
DefyingGravity: FUCK ENDEAVOUR
RosietheRibbitor: FUCK ENDEAVOUR
TENya: FUCK ENDEAVOUR
BubblegumBitch: Yes? 911?
BubblegumBitch: I'd like to report a murder!
Fire&Ice: I appreciate the sentiment but I'm already working on taking Endeavour down
Fire&Ice: By draining his bank account one ridiculously huge purchase at a time
ListenHere: Yeah, yeah fuck Endeavour
ListenHere: Do you seriously enjoy Digimon when Pokemon exist in the world?
Fire&Ice: It allowed me to have some joy during a difficult period of my life
Fire&Ice: Also Digimon is way better than Pokemon
PurpleInsomniac: i wouldn't go that far
ListenHere: Yeah while Digimon is nice and all Pokemon made a huge impact on my life
PurpleInsomniac: don't forget digimon was created after pokemon and is a rip off
BubblegumBitch: Damn
BubblegumBitch: Shinsou is really out here ready to throw hands over whether Digimon or Pokemon is better
FuckOff: HEY, YOU SHITTY EXTRA'S!!!
FuckOff: ARE YOU JUST GOING TO ARGUE ON THIS SHITTY FUCKING GROUP CHAT?
FuckOff: OR ARE YOU GOING TO JOIN ME FOR A MOVIE MARATHON IN THE COMMON ROOM?!?!
Chapter 32
Notes:
LoudPapa - Present Mic
TiredDad - Aizawa
PurpleSon - Shinsou
BuffDad - Vlad King
ZappySon - Kaminari
Chapter Text
Ohana Means Family
LoudPapa: @PurpleSon
LoudPapa: WE HEARD ABOUT UA BEING SNOWED IN
LoudPapa: DO YOU HAVE ENOUGH BLANKETS?
LoudPapa: ENOUGH WARM CLOTHES?
LoudPapa: ENOUGH HOT COCO MIX?
TiredDad: Hizashi, I'm sure which ever teacher is stuck watching them has it covered
TiredDad: Who's watching you?
PurpleSon: midnight
TiredDad: So basically no one is watching you?
PurpleSon: ...
TiredDad: Let Midnight know I'm coming in
TiredDad: I don't trust her to keep you problem children from destroying the dorms
LoudPapa: SHOUTA!!!
TiredDad: I'll take a cab
LoudPapa: IT'S A BLIZZARD!!!
LoudPapa: THERE'S ZERO VISABLITY!!!
TiredDad: I'll take the train then
PurpleSon: the news said all trains are shut down until the blizzard is over
TiredDad: I'll walk then
LoudPapa: DON'T BE STUPID
LoudPapa: YOU'RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE UNTIL THE BLIZZARD IS OVER
PurpleSon: dad, everything will be fine
PurpleSon: right now everyone is watching movies underneath millions of blanket
TiredDad: What about Midoriya?
PurpleSon: cuddling todoroki and drinking coco
TiredDad: Bakugou?
PurpleSon: wearing a fuzzy sweater and baking cookies with kirishima
LoudPapa: SEE SHOUTA! NOTHING TO BE WORRIED ABOUT!
PurpleSon: everything is fine dad
TiredDad: Hmmm
LoudPapa: STOP BEING A WORRY WART AND COME CUDDLE ME AND ERI!!!
TiredDad: I'm not being a worry wart I'm just being cautious
PurpleSon: everything is under control dad
TiredDad: Fine
TiredDad: But if I hear anything about the dorms being destroyed or any quirk related shenanigans I swear I will give the whole class a months worth of detention!
PurpleSon: whatever
Fam™
ZappySon: Hope you and Jeremiah are nice and warm
BuffDad: Jeremiah and I are both tucked into bed and currently watching Secret Life of Pets
BuffDad: [jeremiahwrappedinblanketlookinglikeaburrito.jpeg]
ZappySon: Secret Life of Pets?!
ZappySon: Lucky! I'm stuck watching the Avengers!
BuffDad: I forgot you hate all things Marvel
ZappySon: I don't hate all things Marvel
ZappySon: I like the X-Men, Black Panther, Gaurdians of the Galaxy, Deadpool, and Captain Marvel
BuffDad: But you hate the Avengers?
ZappySon: It's an overrated series
ZappySon: You're lucky you don't have to watch this
BuffDad: You know I can't watch violent movies….
BuffDad: Jeremiah gets nightmares
ZappySon: Ugh, I'm ready for this blizzard to be over
BuffDad: Just you wait it'll be over before you know it and you'll be complaining about how you want the blizzard back
ZappySon: Ugh
BuffDad: Any plans for your days off?
ZappySon: Probably finish any unfinished homework and hang out with my friends
BuffDad: Smart
BuffDad: Any plans with Shinsou?
ZappySon: SENSEI
BuffDad: What?
ZappySon: You just can't ask me that!
BuffDad: Why not?
ZappySon: You're basically my dad!
BuffDad: I was young once and I know what you kids get up to
ZappySon: PLEASE STOP
ZappySon: I don't want to know what you got up to when you were younger
BuffDad: Alright, I'll stop
BuffDad: But remember to use protection
ZappySon: That's it! I'm leaving!
Chapter 33
Notes:
MamaInko - Inko Midoriya
LittleZuku - Deku
HotNCold - Todoroki
FlameTip - Fuyumi
DenseIceCube - Natsuo
Daddy'sLittleFuckUp - Touya/Dabi
Chapter Text
Green Team
LittleZuku: Hey, Mom!
LittleZuku: Didn't know if you heard the news there's a huge blizzard going on and the majority of UA is snowed in
LittleZuku: But I'm fine….everything here is fine
MamaInko: Oh, Izuku! I heard about the storm from Mitsuki!
MamaInko: I'm glad you're safe! I'd rather you be there than here!
MamaInko: How is little Katsuki?
LittleZuku: Loud as ever
MamaInko: What about that nice boy you're seeing?
LittleZuku: MOM
MamaInko: Yagi-san says he's a very handsome boy!
LittleZuku: YOU AND ALL MIGHT TALK ABOUT MY RELATIONSHIP WITH TODOROKI?!?!
MamaInko: Todoroki? Is that his name?
MamaInko: If you told me anything of this I wouldn't have to talk to Yagi-san about it
LittleZuku: His name is Todoroki Shouto
LittleZuku: I'm sorry for not telling you it's just between school work, training, and the occaisonal villain attack I've been busy
LittleZuku: But I will try to do my best to talk to you at least once a week
MamaInko: I know you will, Izuku, you're a good boy!
MamaInko: Next time you come home bring that Todoroki Shouto with you I'll make katsudon!
LittleZuku: I will
Island of Endeavour's Misfit Kids
HotNCold: Just letting you guys know that I'm safe inside the dorms
FlameTip: Good evening, Shoucchan!
FlameTip: Father already informed us of UA being snowed in
HotNCold: Probably upset he couldn't also control the weather
DenseIceCube: He totally was!
DenseIceCube: The old man sulked in his office for like ever!
FlameTip: He wasn't sulking, Natsuo! He was working!
DenseIceCube: "working"
HotNCold: Has anyone talked to Touya lately?
Daddy'sLittleFuckUp: I was summoned?
HotNCold: I don't know you're living situation at the moment but there's a blizzard and I just wanted to know if you're warm and safe
FlameTip: ^
DenseIceCube: ^
HotNCold: I mean I would meet up with you somewhere to give you blankets but I'm kind of snowed in at the moment
Daddy'sLittleFuckUp: Shouldn't you be cuddling up to that sweet thang you've been seeing instead of worrying about me?
FlameTip: SWEET THANG?!
DenseIceCube: SWEET THANG?!
HotNCold has left the group chat
FlameTip has added HotNCold back to the group chat
FlameTip: What did Touya mean by "sweet thang"?
HotNCold: Uh
DenseIceCube: Has our baby brother got himself a girlfriend?!
FlameTip: Don't be so close minded
DenseIceCube: Oh, right!
DenseIceCube: Has our baby brother got himself a girlfriend, boyfriend, and/or a datemate?!
HotNCold: Uhh
Daddy'sLittleFuckUp: Natsuo....
Daddy'sLittleFuckUp: Fuyumi….
Daddy'sLittleFuckUp: I don't think you two should be assuming that our baby brother is monogamous after all his class is full of attractive people and you know what they say about assuming
HotNCold: Uhhh
FlameTip: I mean it is the modern era
DenseIceCube: Twice as many partners means twice as many nieces and nephews!!!
Daddy'sLittleFuckUp: Now you're getting the right idea!
HotNCold: THAT'S IT!!! STOP THAT!!!
Daddy'sLittleFuckUp: But Shoucchan we're just trying to be supportive of you!
HotNCold: Yeah well you three are being too supportive and you need to stop!
Chapter 34
Notes:
Shinsou = IPutASpellOnYou
Deku = SmolBean
Todoroki = PrinceZukoButGayer
Uraraka = fuckgravity
Tsu = PepetheFrog
IIida = ZoomZoom
Chapter Text
Deku + Friends
IPutASpellOnYou: i have a dilemma
SmolBean: What kind of dilemma?
SmolBean: A quirk/villain dilemma or a normal dilemma?
fuckgravity: Did Midoriya walk in on you again?
SmolBean: URARAKA
fuckgravity: It's a valid question!
PepetheFrog: I'm pretty sure if it was a villain dilemma then Principal Nezu would have said something
PrinceZukoButGayer: Do you need me to hurt someone?
ZoomZoom: SHINSOU!!! AS YOUR CLASS PRESIDENT I INSIST YOU REPORT ANY VILLAIN SHENANIGANS TO THE SCHOOL!!!
PepetheFrog: And here we have two different types of friends
fuckgravity: Did Iida just say shenanigans?
IPutASpellOnYou: it's not villain or quirk related
IPutASpellOnYou: and no midoriya didn't walk in on me….again
SmolBean: You can tell us anything, Shinsou!
fuckgravity: Yeah! We're your friends!
IPutASpellOnYou: it's kind of personal
fuckgravity: @ZoomZoom You heard the man!
fuckgravity: Cover your ears so we can talk about grown-up things!
PrinceZukoButGayer: What's your dilemma?
IPutASpellOnYou: me and denki were alone in his room because we're still snowed in and haven't had school in forever we thought it would be the best time to….you know
ZoomZoom: Denki and I
PepetheFrog: Making whoopee?
fuckgravity: Doing the horizontal tango?
PrinceZukoButGayer: Fucking.
SmolBean: You and Denki were having a good time and something happened
SmolBean: No need to beat around the bush
SmolBean: What happened?
IPutASpellOnYou: we got each other off by talking about how we wanted to get wrecked by other people!!!
ZoomZoom: Uraraka, you were right I should have covered my ears
PepetheFrog: Still not the weirdest thing I've read on this chat
SmolBean: To each their own
PrinceZukoButGayer: Sounds hot
fuckgravity: TODOROKI
PrinceZukoButGayer: What?
SmolBean: I'm kind of lost
SmolBean: Which part of that is the dilemma?
IPutASpellOnYou: on one hand it was kind of hot but on the other hand it kind of felt….
PepetheFrog: Wrong?
IPutASpellOnYou: yeah
SmolBean: I think as long it was consensual then there should be no problem
SmolBean: But if it makes you feel bad like this then maybe you should talk to Kaminari about limits in the bedroom
DekuDeku >>>> PurpleInsomniac
DekuDeku: I didn't want to ask in front of the others because it's personal but….
DekuDeku: Who did you guys fantasize about?
PurpleInsomniac: that's kind of personal
DekuDeku: Are you afraid I'll judge your choice?
PurpleInsomniac: maybe
DekuDeku: I promise I won't judge the person you choose to fantasize about
PurpleInsomniac: pinky promise?
DekuDeku: Pinky promise
[…]
DekuDeku: Are you still there?
PurpleInsomniac: yeah, just trying to work up the courage to type it out
DekuDeku: Would it help if I told you an embarrassing sex story of mine?
PurpleInsomniac: what? all might's successor isn't 100% perfect?
DekuDeku: What? Eraserhead's protege isn't 100% perfect?
PurpleInsomniac: touche
DekuDeku: Well?
PurpleInsomniac: my fantasy was to watch todoroki fuck denki
DekuDeku: ....
DekuDeku: That's it?
PurpleInsomniac: you're taking this better than i thought you would
DekuDeku: I can see the appeal
DekuDeku: But Shouto is a power bottom
PurpleInsomniac: denki is a switch
DekuDeku: What would happen if a muscular power bottom dominated a scrawny switch?
PurpleInsomniac: who cares? it would be hot!
DekuDeku: Yeah, it would!
DekuDeku >>>> Fire&Ice
DekuDeku: [screenshotofdekusconvowithshinsou.jpeg]
Fire&Ice: I never pinned Kaminari as a switch
DekuDeku: That's all you absorbed from said conversation?
Fire&Ice: Someone's in mood
DekuDeku: You can punish me later
DekuDeku: What do you think of Kaminari?
Fire&Ice: Sexually?
DekuDeku: I know we've never talked about adding other people to our sex life but I thought it was hot then and I still think it's hot now
Fire&Ice: Izuku
DekuDeku: But I'm only into it if you are!
Fire&Ice: IZUKU
DekuDeku: Yeah?
Fire&Ice: I'd only be into if you were in the room
DekuDeku: You like the thought of putting on a show for me?
Fire&Ice: Don't get it twisted, baby boy, I'm the one in charge here
DekuDeku: Yes, sir!
Chapter Text
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
MouseGod: ATTENTION ALL STUDENTS AS OF RIGHT NOW THE BLIZZARD IS OVER AND UA IS OFFICIALY NOT SNOWED IN AND CLASSES WILL CONTINUE MONDAY!!!
MouseGod has left the group chat
FuckOff: THANK FUCKING GOD!!!
theROCK: I swear to All Might Bakugou broke down in happy tears the second Principal Nezu's message popped up
PikaPikaBitch: SOFT BAKUGOU
theROCK: SOFT BAKUGOU
BubblegumBitch: SOFT BAKUGOU
cellofame: SOFT BAKUGOU
DekuDeku: SOFT BAKUGOU
ListenHere: It has less to do with him being soft and more to do with the fact that if we were cooped up together one more day he would have killed all of us starting with Kaminari
PikaPikaBitch: If we were cooped up together one more day I would have killed everyone in our class starting with myself
PurpleInsomniac: mood
Fire&Ice: Such a mood
Birdman: Big fucking mood
OneOfYourFrenchGirls: Oui, to celebrate the end of this nonsense I'm going to the spa!
Invisibitch: I'm going downtown to see if they cleared up the rink
Invisibitch: This is perfect ice skating weather!
KarateKid: Can I come with?
Invisibitch: Sure! We'll get coco after!
DefyingGravity: Anyone wanna go to that cat cafe with me?
RosietheRibbitor: I will
BubblegumBitch: Is this a date or….?
DefyingGravity: It's not a date
DefyingGravity: This time
BubblegumBitch: Awsome! Let's pet some cats!
cellofame: @PikaPikaBitch Hey, Denki! Wanna go to the arcade or something?
PikaPikaBitch: I would but I promised Vlad Dad that I would swing by after the blizzard died down
DekuDeku: Shoucchan, didn't you say you were going that way?
Fire&Ice: What?
DekuDeku >>>> Fire&Ice
DekuDeku: You said last night you wouldn't mind dominating Kaminari
Fire&Ice: I did
DekuDeku: You also said if an opportunity presented itself you would bring it up to him
Fire&Ice: And you think that's now?
DekuDeku: Vlad King's apartment is not that far from the route you take to go home
DekuDeku: So what's a ten minute delay if you get to feel out the situation with Kaminari?
Fire&Ice: ....
Fire&Ice: Fine, but you have to calm down babe or the others will know what's up
DekuDeku: I can be calm
Fire&Ice: I don't believe that for a second
Fire&Ice: Which is why I'm taking this situation over
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
Fire&Ice: Oh, yeah, a new soba place popped up around their last week but because of classes, training, and then the blizzard I haven't been able to go
Fire&Ice: I know you don't own a lot of warm clothes Kaminari so if you want a ride I can drop you off on my way?
PikaPikaBitch: Are you sure dude?
PikaPikaBitch: I know how much you like soba and I really don't want to get in between you two
DekuDeku: He's sure
Fire&Ice: I'm sure
PikaPikaBitch: Okay, then thanks a bunch man! Just let me know when you're ready to leave!
Fire&Ice: Will do
PikaPikaBitch: I should probably shower and get some stuff around
PikaPikaBitch has left the group chat
DekuDeku: Shoucchan didn't you say you'd help me with some new techniques?
Fire&Ice: I thought you perfected everything?
DekuDeku: I came up with this new move and I need your help
Fire&Ice: I'll be right there
DekuDeku has left the group chat
Fire&Ice has left the group chat
FuckOff: What the fuck was that?!
PurpleInsomniac: a couple of idiots being too obvious
FuckOff: What's that supposed to mean?!
PurpleInsomniac: don't worry about it
FuckOff: How I am not supposed to worry about it?!
PurpleInsomniac: it's a good thing you're pretty
FuckOff: YOU TRYING TO PICK A FIGHT?!
theROCK: Babe, calm down he just called you pretty
cellofame: Yeah, Bakubro!
cellofame: He's not trying to fight, he's trying to fuck!
PikaPikaBitch >>>> PurpleInsomniac
PikaPikaBitch: YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE THE NIGHT I'VE HAD!
PurpleInsomniac: i take it you had a good night?
PikaPikaBitch: TODOROKI FUCKING SHOUTO PROPERSISTIONED ME?!?!
Chapter 36
Notes:
AlienQueen - Mina
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape - Sero
LordExplosionMurder - Bakugou
BabySharkDooDoo - Kirishima
Chapter Text
Bakusquad
AlienQueen: Okay, are we just going to pretend that Shinsou called Bakugo pretty didn't happen?
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: I think it was less saying that he found Bakugou pretty and more saying that thank god he's pretty because he doesn't have any brains
LordExplosionMurder: WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST SAY?!?!
BabySharkDooDoo: Babe, calm down, I'm sure he didn't mean anything by it
AlienQueen: What was it you said yesterday, Sero?
AlienQueen: He's not trying to fight, he's trying to fuck?
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: You think Shinsou could have a thing for Bakubro?
AlienQueen: I mean
AlienQueen: He is blonde
LordExplosionMurder: WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?!
AlienQueen: Well, before Shinsou got with Denki he did show interest in Monoma (before he got with Aoyama) and Ojiro
AlienQueen: And what's this?
AlienQueen: Monoma and Ojiro are both blondes!
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: Okay but with that logic then he should have showed interest in Aoyama too
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: Besides being blonde what else could they have in common?
AlienQueen: No clue
AlienQueen: Kaminari is soft and cuddly
AlienQueen: And Bakugou is none of those things
BabySharkDooDoo: That's not true!
LordExplosionMurder: PIPE DOWN, HAIR FOR BRAINS!!!
AlienQueen: Now hold on, Bakubro, we want to hear this!
AlienQueen: Don't we, Sero?
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: Bet your caramel smelling nitroglycerin sweat we do!
LordExplosionMurder: HE'S NOT GOING TO TELLING YOU SHIT!!!!
BabySharkDooDoo: I thought the purpose of this chat was to come to the conclusion of whether or not Shinsou thinks Bakugou is pretty/wants to fuck him?
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: Thanks for getting us back on track!
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: Who do you think would top?
AlienQueen: Shinsou
LordExplosionMurder: ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR GODDAMN MIND?!?!
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: I can see it
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: Maybe he'll fuck Bakubro into a better mood
BabySharkDooDoo: I'd watch it
LordExplosionMurder: BABE, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!
BabySharkDooDoo: I'm just saying it would be hot
AlienQueen: I'm sure with a quirk like his it'd be quick work whipping our explosion boy into submission
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: I saw him without a shirt once he's one good looking dude
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: 10/10
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: Would let him wreck me
AlienQueen: You would?
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: Sure, if Kaminari was the sharing type
BabySharkDooDoo: I don't know you guys
BabySharkDooDoo: Shinsou practically worships Kaminari
BabySharkDooDoo: Who says he'll stray?
AlienQueen: Honesty time?
LordExplosionMurder: JUST SPIT IT OUT, RACCOON EYES!!!
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: Spit that truth girl!
AlienQueen: Honesty time!
AlienQueen: If I wasn't more into chicks than dicks I'd let him in my panties
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: Same
BabySharkDooDoo: Same
LordExplosionMurder: ….
BabySharkDooDoo: Bakugou won't say it but he would too
LordExplosionMurder: DON'T FUCKING SPEAK FOR ME!!!
BabySharkDooDoo: What was it you said to me after the first time you saw him in his cutesy stuff?
BabySharkDooDoo: Oh, yeah!
BabySharkDooDoo: "I may be a bottom, but I'd top him!"
Chapter 37
Notes:
MouseGod - Nezu
NeverFearIAmHere - All Might
AnimeMcCree - Snipe
OffBrandDracula - Vlad King
WhipsNChainsExciteMe - Midnight
HearMeOnTheRadio - Present Mic
ImTooTiredForThis - Aizawa
Chapter Text
Walmart Brand Justice League
MouseGod: @ImTooTiredForThis
MouseGod: What's wrong?
NeverFearIAmHere: Yeah, Aizawa! Why the long face?
AnimeMcCree: Maybe it's his coffee?
AnimeMcCree: Maybe someone switched his coffee for decafe?
OffBrandDracula: Can't be it
OffBrandDracula: Nezu makes sure all the coffee is non decafe
WhipsNChainsExciteMe: Maybe he hasn't had sex in a while?
AnimeMcCree: Eh….if that was so wouldn't Mic be in a bad mood too?
OffBrandDracula: He has a point
HearMeOnTheRadio: Alright, guys that's enough!
HearMeOnTheRadio: Shouta's a little stressed about dinner tonight
AnimeMcCree: What's so stressful about dinner?
WhipsNChainsExciteMe: Dessert if you play your cards rights
OffBrandDracula: I don't know that doesn't sound right
NeverFearIAmHere: Dinners the best part of the day!
AnimeMcCree: I thought it was breakfast?
WhipsNChainsExciteMe: Apparently, it's dinner?
NeverFearIAmHere: It's the time of day when the whole family gets together and enjoys each others company!
NeverFearIAmHere: Who doesn't enjoy family get togethers?
OffBrandDracula: From what I've heard….the Todoroki's
WhipsNChainsExciteMe: @MouseGod When is that piece of shit going to get sacked?!
MouseGod: I'm working on it
MouseGod: But as far as the committee is concerned that flaming garbage can is the number one hero
NeverFearIAmHere: For now!
WhipsNChainsExciteMe: Yeah, yeah
WhipsNChainsExciteMe: You're training Midoriya to take over as Japan's Symbol of Peace
WhipsNChainsExciteMe: We've heard it all before
OffBrandDracula: @NeverFearIAmHere Isn't it unprofessional to favor a student?
NeverFearIAmHere: You're one to talk! What about your relationship with Young Kaminari?!
OffBrandDracula: First of all, I don't teach Denchan, you definitely teach Midoriya
OffBrandDracula: Second of all, as of a few years ago his dirt bag parents gave up all parental rights and were going to put that ball of sunshine in foster care just because he likes to dress cutesy!!!!!!
WhipsNChainsExciteMe: Sekijiro said Kaminari rights!
WhipsNChainsExciteMe: Also….
WhipsNChainsExciteMe: You call him Denchan? How cute!
OffBrandDracula: We've been close ever since I adopted him
OffBrandDracula: He calls me Vlad Dad
OffBrandDracula: Jeremiah would never forgive me if I got rid of him now
WhipsNChainsExciteMe: Aww
AnimeMcCree: Aww
NeverFearIAmHere: Aww
HearMeOnTheRadio: Speaking of Kaminari
HearMeOnTheRadio: Apparently Hitoshi has been seeing Kaminari for months and wants to introduce him to us as his boyfriend
HearMeOnTheRadio: So basically me, Shouta, Eri, Hitoshi, and Kaminari are having dinner tonight
ImTooTiredForThis: I have to deal with that knock off Pikachu for six hours a day, five days a week!
ImTooTiredForThis: And now I have to have dinner with him!
ImTooTiredForThis: BECAUSE MY SON DIDN'T HEED MY WARNING ABOUT LOUD BLONDES!!!!!!
HearMeOnTheRadio: To be fair you started it
OffBrandDracula: Oh, so that's what he's doing!
AnimeMcCree: You didn't know what your son-in-everything-but-name is doing tonight?
OffBrandDracula: He told me he was having dinner with Shinsou
OffBrandDracula: I didn't know it was THAT dinner
WhipsNChainsExciteMe: Good times
Chapter 38
Notes:
HandsyMcFace - Shigaraki
SmokeDaddy - Kurogiri
MyBlueEyes - Dabi/Todoroki Touya
KnockOffDeadpool - Twice
FifthTeenageMutantNinjaTurtle - Spinner
BigSisMag - Magne
SassyChickenNuget - Hawks
PsychoBarbie - Toga
Sensei - All For One
MarbleMan - Mr. Compress
WeasltonfromZootopia - Giran
PlagueDoctor - Overhaul
Stain - Stain
Chapter Text
Scrappy Doo Level Villains
Five people have been added to the Scrappy Doo Level Villains group chat
MyBlueEyes: Isn't there enough people in this group chat already?
KnockOffDeadpool: No?
PsychoBarbie: NO!!!!!!
MyBlueEyes: Ugh, I'm going back to bed
MyBlueEyes has left the chat
SmokeDaddy has added MyBlueEyes back to the chat
SmokeDaddy: If I have to be here then so do you!
SassyChickenNuget: I think its a great idea!
SassyChickenNuget: The more the merrier!
MyBlueEyes: You would say that
BigSisMag: I was at my hair appointment
BigSisMag: What's going on?
KnockOffDeadpool: Toga added new people to the chat!
MyBlueEyes: In all honesty, I didn't know she knew this many people
MyBlueEyes: Also @BigSisMag you're a villain….how do you afford hair appointments?
BigSisMag: First of all, be nice!
BigSisMag: And second of all, I get my hair cut at the beauty college!
MyBlueEyes: That would explain somethings about your hair
BigSisMag: I said be nice!
BigSisMag: Don't make me get the spray bottle!
FifthTeenageMutantNinjaTurtle: New people? Sweet!
FifthTeenageMutantNinjaTurtle: Just got back from a food run anyone want any food?
HandsyMcFace: I'm trying to scheme! But my phones been buzzing like crazy!
HandsyMcFace: What's going on?!
SmokeDaddy: Toga added more people to the group chat
HandsyMcFace: She knows more than eight people?
MyBlueEyes: That's what I said
PsychoBarbie: WHY ARE ALL OF YOU BEING MEAN TO ME?!?!
SassyChickenNuget: I thought it was a great idea!
MyBlueEyes: Kiss ass
SassyChickenNuget: What?
PlagueDoctor: Don't tell me this is what the league does in between schemes?
MyBlueEyes: Of all the people you could've added you had to add fucking Overhaul?!
KnockOffDeadpool: How'd you know it's him?
MyBlueEyes: My asshole alarm was going off
MarbleMan: He'd be much more tolerable if I could COMPRESS his shitty attitude and then just throw it away!
WeasltonfromZootopia: I'm trying to broker some shady deals but my phone is ringing non stop…how do you kids silence a phone?
MyBlueEyes: Jesus Christ, not top hat guy and greasy black market guy….
MyBlueEyes: Toga actually picked a good name for Giran
PsychoBarbie: THANK YOU
Stain: I'm trying to scheme, can you guys pipe down?
MyBlueEyes: @PsychoBarbie How the fuck do you have Stain's number?
SassyChickenNuget: I mean it makes sense
SassyChickenNuget: Since Toga is such a huge fan of his
FifthTeenageMutantNinjaTurtle: Oh my god! Stain! I'm such a huge fan!!
Stain: Thanks?
SassyChickenNuget: And Spinner too?
MyBlueEyes: He's not that big of a deal
MyBlueEyes: ....
MyBlueEyes: @Stain Do you take requests?
Stain: Requests?
MyBlueEyes: I mean you're the infamous hero killer and I was wondering if you could kill a certain fire using hero who fucked up a perfectly sane child?
Stain: Uh…
HandsyMcFace: HEY!!! I'M YOUR BOSS AND YOU'RE MY EMPLOYEE!!! IF YOU WANT TO KILL SOMEONE YOU COME TO ME!!!
MyBlueEyes: B-but Stain's the savior
PlagueDoctor: Trouble in paradise?
HandsyMcFace: Fuck off, you psychopath!
PlagueDoctor: What's wrong, Shiggy? Can't control your henchmen?
Sensei: SILENCE
HandsyMcFace: Sensei!!!
Sensei: MY
Sensei: OFFICE
Sensei: NOW
Chapter Text
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
PikaPikaBitch: Today was a weird day
ListenHere: Isn't everyday a weird day to you?
PikaPikaBitch: Bite me!
ListenHere: Be there, done that, wasn't very satisfying
PikaPikaBitch: Very funny
ListenHere: I try
DefyingGravity: What happened, Kaminari?
PikaPikaBitch: Your parents give you little nicknames yeah?
Invisibitch: What like honey or sweetie or something?
PikaPikaBitch: Kinda but more….personalized
RosietheRibbitor: My little sister and brother call me TsuTsu
PikaPikaBitch: Yeah, just like that!
momoyoro: What does that have to do with you having a weird day?
ListenHere: Yeah, Kami, speak up or we'll move on to another topic!
DefyingGravity: Hang on now!
DefyingGravity: It could be really embarrassing! Maybe that's why he's hesitating!
RosietheRibbitor: Have a little compassion, Jirou!
Invisibitch: Yeah!
BubblegumBitch: Be gentle with him!
BubblegumBitch: He's sensitive!
PikaPikaBitch: I'm not sensitive!
ListenHere: yes you are
BubblegumBitch: yes you are
momoyoro: yes you are
Invisibitch: yes you are
RosietheRibbitor: yes you are
DefyingGravity: Kaminari, you once cried because your ice cream fell off your cone before you could eat it
PikaPikaBitch: It was mint chocolate chip you heathens!
PikaPikaBitch: And I was having a really bad day!
ListenHere: What's going on Denki?
PikaPikaBitch: Ever since Vlad King adopted me we've gotten pretty close
DefyingGravity: As one does with their parent
PikaPikaBitch: Well, I think he told another pro heroes/teachers my nickname because
PikaPikaBitch: When I was walking back from lunch when Midnight appeared out of nowhere, called me by my nickname, smiled and then tousled my hair like I'm a little kid or something
RosietheRibbitor: hmm
DefyingGravity: At least she isn't calling you kitten anymore!
ListenHere: Man, Denki, what is it with you and dominate women?
ListenHere: First me and now Midnight?
BubblegumBitch: Damn Denki! I didn't know you were into cougars!
PikaPikaBitch: Oh come on! You know I'm strictly dick now!
BubblegumBitch: Shinsou better watch out!
momoyoro: Just tell us the nickname/pet name and then we'll go on from there!
Invisibitch: Yeah! You can trust us! We're your friends!
PikaPikaBitch: Well, I call him Vlad Dad and he calls me….
PikaPikaBitch: Denchan
[…]
PikaPikaBitch: Are you guys still there?
RosietheRibbitor: That's cute
DefyingGravity: SO ADORABLE!!!!
BubblegumBitch: I'm so going to call you Denchan from now on!
ListenHere: Denchan? What are you five?
PikaPikaBitch: I regret ever trusting you guys!!!
Fire&Ice >>>> PikaPikaBitch
Fire&Ice: Denchan?
PikaPikaBitch: Oh my god!
PikaPikaBitch: Does everyone know about that now?!
Fire&Ice: Well, it certainly doesn't help that Ashido was going around yelling Denchan at the top of her lungs
PikaPikaBitch: There goes my reputation
Fire&Ice: What reputation?
PikaPikaBitch: You must think I'm such a little kid
Fire&Ice: Why?
Fire&Ice: I let Izuku call me Shoucchan
PikaPikaBitch: Yeah but that's what your boyfriend calls you, this is something my DAD calls me!
Fire&Ice: Well if it makes you feel any better I think the name Denchan is cute
Fire&Ice: Just like it's owner
PikaPikaBitch: Thanks
Fire&Ice: But maybe I can give you a pet name? For just the two of us?
PikaPikaBitch: That'd be bitching!
Fire&Ice: Yeah?
PikaPikaBitch: Yeah!
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
FuckOff: WHY THE FUCK DID ICYHOT JUST CALL DUNCE FACE "SUNFLOWER"?!?!
FuckOff: AND WHY THE FUCK DID DUNCE FACE FUCKING BLUSH?!?!
FuckOff: WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?!?!
Chapter Text
PikaPikaBitch has created a new group
PikaPikaBitch has added PurpleInsomniac, DekuDeku, and Fire&Ice to the group chat
PikaPikaBitch has named the group chat SexyTimes
PurpleInsomniac: really, babe?
PurpleInsomniac: another group chat?
DekuDeku: Yay! Another group chat!
Fire&Ice: Ugh another group chat
PikaPikaBitch: I swear I have a really good reason for making this group chat and calling it SexyTimes
Fire&Ice: Let's have it, Sunflower!
PurpleInsomniac: sunflower?
DekuDeku: Sunflower?
PikaPikaBitch: One of the reasons why I created this group chat!
PikaPikaBitch: This way we can talk about or plan our sexy times without the rest of the class knowing about it!
DekuDeku: Good idea!
PurpleInsomniac: you call him sunflower?
Fire&Ice: Yeah? What about it?
PurpleInsomniac: it's just i didn't know you two were that close
Fire&Ice: Why what do you call him?
PurpleInsomniac: it doesn't matter what i call him!
DekuDeku: Hey now we're all friends here!
PikaPikaBitch: I made this chat specifically so that we can talk about your fantasy @PurpleInsomniac
PikaPikaBitch: And whether or not we will go through with it
PikaPikaBitch: BUT
PikaPikaBitch: This is a safe place so no fighting!
DekuDeku: ^
PurpleInsomniac: kitten
Fire&Ice: Huh?
PurpleInsomniac: i call him kitten
DekuDeku: A fitting name
Fire&Ice: I bet he purrs for you nicely
PikaPikaBitch: But that's only when I bottom
Fire&Ice: What do you call him when you top?
PikaPikaBitch: Wouldn't you like to know
Fire&Ice: I would
DekuDeku: I guess it's a good sign that there's chemistry between them
PurpleInsomniac: makes you wonder what they'd be like in person
DekuDeku: Quick question and this may be nothing but…
DekuDeku: Where would we do this?
PurpleInsomniac: we're not doing this here in the dorms
DekuDeku: Agreed
PikaPikaBitch: Should I wear something special?
Fire&Ice: Why? It would just end up on the floor
PikaPikaBitch: Yeah but don't you want to see me in something naughty?
Fire&Ice: Naughty?
PikaPikaBitch: A pair of panties that are tight in all the right places
Fire&Ice: Show me!
PikaPikaBitch: But that would ruin the surprise
DekuDeku: We can't do it at my house
PurpleInsomniac: we definitely can't do it at mine
DekuDeku: And Shoucchan's place is out of the question
PurpleInsomniac: maybe a hotel?
DekuDeku: Price isn't an obstacle
PurpleInsomniac: endeavors credit card?
DekuDeku: ENDEAVORS CREDIT CARD!!!
PikaPikaBitch: Wouldn't you rather wait then take them off me with your teeth?
PikaPikaBitch: Don't you want to unwrap your present?
Fire&Ice: Who says I won't just rip it off you?
PikaPikaBitch: So you really don't care what I wear you just want to be rough
Fire&Ice: Now you're catching on
PikaPikaBitch: What can I say? I catch on quickly
Fire&Ice: I hope not everything about you is quick
PikaPikaBitch: I guess you just have to find out for yourself
Fire&Ice: Don't make me ask twice
PikaPikaBitch: Kinky
Chapter Text
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
Invisibitch: I don't know who's in the kitchen
Invisibitch: But whatever you're making it smells amazing!
PourSomeSugarOnMe: It's not me! I'm not on campus!
theROCK: It's not Bakubabe either! We're at the mall!
Invisibitch: If it's not Satou and it's not Bakugou….then who is it?
KarateKid: You guys are never going to believe in a million years who it is!
DefyingGravity: It can't be THAT unbelievable
ListenHere: Can it?
KarateKid: [picofkaminaricookingwhilewearingaridiculousapron.jpeg]
DefyingGravity: Kaminari can cook?
ListenHere: I'm just surprised the kitchen isn't on fire!
Invisibitch: ^
KarateKid: I don't know what to tell you guys
KarateKid: I went to the kitchen to make myself some lunch and he was just there making a grilled cheese
RosietheRibbitor: Just there making a grilled cheese?
KarateKid: Well….
KarateKid: He was dancing around the kitchen singing into the spatula
Invisibitch: Why didn't you say that then?
DefyingGravity: I think he was just surprised the kitchen was in one piece and not on fire
DefyingGravity: I mean he did explode the microwave that one time by microwaving a metal fork
ListenHere: What was he singing?
KarateKid: I think it was the Space Jam theme song?
ListenHere: You think?
KarateKid: All I heard was "Come on let's jam!" then I went on to make myself a sandwich
RosietheRibbitor: What kind of cheese did he use?
KarateKid: Gouda
KarateKid: At least that's what the wrapper in the garbage said
theROCK: Bakugou said that anyone who doesn't use cheddar for a grilled cheese is a and I quote "a fucking heathen!"
RosietheRibbitor: ^
ListenHere: ^
DefyingGravity: ^
Invisibitch: ^
PourSomeSugarOnMe: ^
KarateKid: Kaminari said and I quote "ok boomer!"
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
Fire&Ice: @PikaPikaBitch How was that grilled cheese?
PikaPikaBitch: Wouldn't you like to know
Fire&Ice: Yes, I would
PikaPikaBitch: Then make your own….bitch
PikaPikaBitch has left the chat
Fire&Ice has left the chat
momoyoro: Was that flirting?
cellofame: I couldn't tell
cellofame: It was really aggressive
BubblegumBitch: Kind of like when Kiri and Bakubro flirt?
cellofame: Yes!
FuckOff: WHAT
Chapter Text
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
PikaPikaBitch: Quick question for Class 1A!
PikaPikaBitch: What kind of stuff do you guys do when you're bored!
PikaPikaBitch: Because I'm doing laundry and I'm losing my mind!
PikaPikaBitch: Now! Go!
OneOfYourFrenchGirls: When I'm bored I give myself a makeover!
PikaPikaBitch: I'm all sweaty and wearing sweats
PikaPikaBitch: Pass!
CalloftheWild: I spend quality time with my pets!
PikaPikaBitch: Don't have pets! Also my quirk is electricity based so I get really staticy sometimes!
PikaPikaBitch: Pass!
Birdman: I doubt you'll be interested but…
Birdman: I usually listen to podcasts when I get bored doing things like laundry or cleaning
PikaPikaBitch: You've peaked my interest
PikaPikaBitch: Tell me more!
Birdman: I don't know about here in Japan but over in America podcasts are super popular
Birdman: All you have to do is download a podcast app
Birdman: Some people use Apple podcasts or Spotify but I use Podcast Addict the layout is simple and it's easy to use!
PikaPikaBitch: What podcasts would you recommend?
Birdman: Well, if you're into cryptids and weird stuff like that then I would recommend; And That's Why We Drink, Astonishing Legends, Dude, That's F*****D Up, Hysteria 51, Occultae Veritatis Podcast, Spirits Podcast, The Cryptid Keeper, This Paranormal Life, and Last Podcast On The Left.
Birdman: But if you're into true crime I can recommend; Crime Beat, Crime In Sports, Crime Junkie, Dark Poutine Podcast, My Favorite Murder, Small Town Murder, True Crime All The Time, True Crime All The Time Unsolved, and True Crime Garage
Birdman: There's also fictional podcasts (i.e. audio dramas and dungeons & dragons); Caravan, EOS10, Good Morning From Hell, Hello From The Magic Tavern, King Falls AM, SAYER, Unwell, a Midwestern Gothic Mystery, The Second Oil Age, The No Sleep Podcast, The Adventure Zone and Critical Role
PikaPikaBitch: That's a lot of podcasts
Birdman: That's not even all of them! I'm currently subscribed to 53 podcasts!
PikaPikaBitch: How do you have time to listen to them and you know attend class and train?
Birdman: Well…
Birdman: I don't really watch TV and my sleep schedule is wack
PikaPikaBitch: Wow
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
PikaPikaBitch: @Birdman So I took a look at those podcast recommendations you gave me
Birdman: And?
PikaPikaBitch: You have really good taste!!!
Birdman: Which ones did you like the most?
PikaPikaBitch: And That's Why We Drink, Hysteria 51, Occultae Veritatis Podcast, The Cryptid Keeper, Last Podcast On The Left, My Favorite Murder, Small Town Murder, Hello From The Magic Tavern, King Falls AM, SAYER, Unwell, a Midwestern Gothic Mystery, The No Sleep Podcast, The Adventure Zone and Critical Role
Birdman: What did you think about Critical Role?
PikaPikaBitch: I ABSOLUTELY FUCKING LOVE IT!!!
Birdman: Which campaign are you listening to? Campaign 1 or Campaign 2?
PikaPikaBitch: CAMPAIGN 2 ALL THE WAY MY FEATHERED FRIEND!!!
Birdman: Who are your favorite characters?
PikaPikaBitch: It's a three way tie between Jester, Nott the Brave, and Mollymauk fucking Tealeaf
Birdman: RIP Molly
PikaPikaBitch: RIP Molly
Birdman: I should have known you would like Nott you two have a lot in common
PikaPikaBitch: Huh?
Birdman: You're both gremlins and shouldn't be fed after midnight
PikaPikaBitch: Very funny, Tokoyami!!!
Birdman: Come to the dark side!
Birdman: We have cookies!
PikaPikaBitch: How am I supposed to join? You won't let me eat after midnight!
Birdman: SUFFER
Chapter Text
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
CalloftheWild: So…
CalloftheWild: Uh…
CalloftheWild: Has anyone seen Kaminari?
GunShow: Not recently
GunShow: Why?
Birdman: What a mad banquet of darkness this is!
KarateKid: But Koji has said anything yet
Birdman: But this is Kaminari we're talking about
Birdman: The guy blew up our first microwave by microwaving a metal fork for fucks sake!
PourSomeSugarOnMe: He has a point
PourSomeSugarOnMe: Is the kitchen in one piece?
Invisibitch: I was just in there
Invisibitch: The kitchens fine
PourSomeSugarOnMe: Oh good
OneOfYourFrenchGirls: @CalloftheWild Why do you ask, mon cherie?
CalloftheWild: So I was watching a documentary on animal planet when who walks in?
CalloftheWild: Kaminari limping with numerous bruises on his neck and being helped in by Shinsou and Midoriya with Todoroki trailing behind them looking pleased
CalloftheWild: I don't know you guys I think Kaminari was attacked by somebody!
Birdman: ....
GunShow: oh
KarateKid: OH
Invisibitch: I don't think you should worry about it, Koda
CalloftheWild: But what if someone roughed him up?
OneOfYourFrenchGirls: I don't think Kaminari has to worry about villains roughing him up Todoroki, Shinsou, and Midoriya roughed him up enough
CalloftheWild: What?
PourSomeSugarOnMe: Hey, Koda!
PourSomeSugarOnMe: Why don't you come to the kitchen and help me bake some cookies?
CalloftheWild: okay
Bakusqaud
LordExplosionMurder: WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO PIKACHU?!?!?!
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: Looks like a bear mauled him
AlienQueen: Yeah, if the bear was Shinsou, Todoroki, and Midoriya!
LordExplosionMurder: WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT SUPPOSE TO MEAN?!?!?!
BabySharkDooDoo: Babe, they're fucking
LordExplosionMurder: ....
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: Good going, Kiri, you broke Bakubro!
BabySharkDooDoo: Nah, he's just connecting the dots
AlienQueen: 3…
AlienQueen: 2…
AlienQueen: 1!
LordExplosionMurder: WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!?!
LordExplosionMurder: THERE'S NO WAY THEY'RE FUCKING?!?!
BabySharkDooDoo: Kat, they were all off campus the entire weekend
LordExplosionMurder: THAT DOESN'T MEAN THEY'RE FUCKING!!!
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: Bro, his neck was covered in hickies and was limping like he was thoroughly fucked
LordExplosionMurder: DUNCE FACE PROBABLY GOT ATTACKED BY SOME LOW LEVEL VILLAIN!!!
AlienQueen: Oh, yeah?
AlienQueen: Then why didn't they take him to recovery girl?
AlienQueen: And why isn't the teachers making a big deal about it?
LordExplosionMurder: IT'S BAD ENOUGH THAT EYE BAGS HANGS AROUND US NOW BUT DID HE HAVE TO CHOOSE ICYHOT AND FUCKING DEKU?!?!
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: Why are you upset, bro?
BabySharkDooDoo: Yeah, that's not very manly of you
AlienQueen: Could it be?
AlienQueen: That our very own Bakugou is jealous?!
LordExplosionMurder: YOU BETTER WATCH YOUR BACK PINKY!!!!!!
Chapter Text
Scrappy Doo Level Villains
SassyChickenNugget: WHO ATE THE LAST OF MY CHICKEN NUGGETS?!?!?!
KnockOffDeadpool: But they weren't dinosaur shaped you only eat the ones that look like dinosaurs
SassyChickenNugget: IT DOESN'T MATTER IF THEY DO OR DON'T LOOK LIKE DINOSAURS!!!!!!
SassyChickenNugget: I DON'T EAT THEM BASED ON WHAT THEY LOOK LIKE!!!!!!
SassyChickenNugget: I EAT THEM BECAUSE THEY'RE CHICKEN NUGGETS!!!!!!
MyBlueEyes: We're out of ketchup
MyBlueEyes: Also, I ate the last of your chicken nuggets
SassyChickenNugget: DABI
Scrappy Doo Level Villains
FifthTeenageMutantNinjaTurtle: Hey, Dabi, I was on my way to get some 'za and I think I saw you in a cat cafe?
MyBlueEyes: What?
MyBlueEyes: A guy can't pet some cats on his day off?!
MarbleMan: You can it's just really, really unexpected
MyBlueEyes: You guys don't make a big deal about it when Toga goes to a cat cafe
MyBlueEyes: Though between the two of us you guys should totally be worried about Toga being around any living animal
KnockOffDeadpool: You can do whatever you want on your day off but….
KnockOffDeadpool: Cats?
MyBlueEyes: Did you guys think I was a dog person or something?
FifthTeenageMutantNinjaTurtle: Maybe?
MyBlueEyes: Dogs can fuck right off
MarbleMan: What did you have a bad experience or something with a dog?
MyBlueEyes: A bulldog tried to use my coat as a chew toy once thankfully some stupid kid with blonde hair and a stupid lightning bolt pulled it away
Scrappy Doo Level Villains
BigSisMag: You wouldn't believe the day I had!
KnockOffDeadpool: Was it good or bad?
FifthTeenageMutantNinjaTurtle: Yeah, I'm confused too
PsychoBarbie: HOW WAS THE MAKEUP HAUL?!
PlagueDoctor: Did someone say haul?
MyBlueEyes: Not that kind of haul
HandsyMcFace: Yes, tell us how much and what kind of makeup did $20.56 get you
BigSisMag: I hit up all the cheap beauty places in the city and came away with some pretty good stuff
PsychoBarbie: I CAN'T WAIT FOR YOU TO SHOW ME!!!
KnockOffDeadpool: I'm sure you bought lots of great stuff!
FifthTeenageMutantNinjaTurtle: Yeah!
BigSisMag: I met the nicest boy while out shopping
HandsyMcFace: Someone actually talked to you?
SmokeDaddy: Tomura, remember I said about league moral
HandsyMcFace: Nice boy, huh?
BigSisMag: Sweet thing with blonde hair and a lightning bolt in the cutest little skirt
MyBlueEyes: Cute huh?
PsychoBarbie: OOO! IS SOMEONE INTERESTED?
MyBlueEyes: I don't know maybe
HandsyMcFace: He's not interested, he's just being an idiot
PlagueDoctor: I don't know he kinda has a thing for blondes
HandsyMcFace: WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?!?!
PlagueDoctor: Think of the three people he's closest to
PlagueDoctor: Hawks, Twice, and Toga
PlagueDoctor: And what do they all have in common?
PlagueDoctor: They're all blonde
HandsyMcFace: Kurogiri, how much trouble can I get in for villain on villain crime?
Chapter Text
HandsyMcFace >>>> MyBlueEyes
HandsyMcFace: You're to remain at the hideout until I say so!
MyBlueEyes: This wouldn't have anything to do with what Overhaul was talking about the other day would it?
HandsyMcFace: I have no idea what you're talking about
HandsyMcFace: Somebody needs to take over for Hawks while I train him or whatever
MyBlueEyes: You're not going to try to kill that kid Magne was talking about are you?
HandsyMcFace: Why do you care?!
MyBlueEyes: I don't
MyBlueEyes: Not really
MyBlueEyes: I just like riling you up
HandsyMcFace: GODDAMNIT, DABI, WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU PLAYING AT?!?!?!
MyBlueEyes: I told you I like riling you up! You get all riled up and angry sex is hot after all!
HandsyMcFace: I should kill you where you stand!
MyBlueEyes: You wouldn't
HandsyMcFace: Why not? You're not irreplaceable!
MyBlueEyes: Go ahead kill me!
MyBlueEyes: But if you do you'll have no one to fuck late at night when you have that ich to scratch
HandsyMcFace: Don't get so cocky!
MyBlueEyes: Why not?
MyBlueEyes: You need me more than I need you!
MyBlueEyes: If you stop fucking me I'll be fine I can always find someone else but you though you'll be miserable
[…]
MyBlueEyes: You're touching yourself aren't you?
HandsyMcFace: FUCK OFF
MyBlueEyes: So I was right
HandsyMcFace: I SAID FUCK OFF
MyBlueEyes: What are you fantasizing about?
MyBlueEyes: Me tying you up and having my way with you?
MyBlueEyes: You sneaking into my room late at night and riding me until you're thoroughly fucked?
MyBlueEyes: Or maybe we'll be in an alley somewhere and I'll beg you to wreck me?
HandsyMcFace: Fuck
MyBlueEyes: You probably wish I was there right now
MyBlueEyes: On my knees taking you into my mouth
MyBlueEyes: Or maybe by your side whispering naughty things into your ear
HandsyMcFace: Dabi
MyBlueEyes: Say it
HandsyMcFace: I won't say it
MyBlueEyes: Say it
HandsyMcFace: I won't say it
MyBlueEyes: Listen here, little boy, you know the rules I can't help you if you don't say it
HandsyMcFace: YOU DON'T KNOW WHO YOU'RE TALKING TO!!!
HandsyMcFace: I'M ALL FOR ONE'S SUCCESSOR!!!
MyBlueEyes: I see
MyBlueEyes has left this chat
Chapter Text
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
PikaPikaBitch: why are they called police dogs and not barcs
Invisibitch: good morning ladies what are we hating men for today
BubblegumBitch: perhaps the real malarkey was the friends we made along the way
OneOfYourFrenchGirls: sometimes a girl will have such an ugly boyfriend that i’m like oh ur like STRAIGHT straight
DefyingGravity: Gynecologist asked if I have a partner and I said “like a sex one?” And she was like “... if that’s all you do” and I am crying
cellofame: Today I completed a chore I have been putting off for six months. It took 15 minutes. I will learn nothing from this.
theROCK: Dudes miss out on so many fun things because they’re so afraid of being called “feminine” or “gay” it’s so lame. Just do whatever the hell you want. Rock makeup. Bake a cake. Make some art. Do what’s fun to you, no one else matters
PurpleInsomniac: What’s a creepy ass *murderous* documentary on netflix or Hulu? Exorcisms welcome.
TENya: if sonic the hedgehog came while spinning would he get it on his face or just shoot it all around him
ListenHere: Unstirred greek yogurt is my worst fucking nightmare
Fire&Ice: Weird how 2020 has lasted 164846294992 years so far
RosietheRibbitor: So anyways the first thing I’m gonna do in Animal Crossing is get drunk with the raccoon man
DekuDeku: maybe when youth pastors say “leave room for Jesus,” they’re suggesting threesomes
FuckOff: inside you are two wolves; straight chaos and gay stress
momoyoro: You ever masturbate so much your clit dissociates?
GunShow: Guy at the hotel gym just came in, turned off cnn, put on Titanic? And started running??
Birdman: I’m having a mental breakdown on the street bc I just reached into the pockets of the pants I’m wearing right now that I thrifted and pulled out a bunch of finger nails how am I supposed to walk into this party I want to shower for 4 day wtf I hate ppl why is my life like this
KarateKid: if I stopped being vegan it would be for one thing and that’s to eat a billionaire alive
PourSomeSugarOnMe: Found a single waffle just lying in the sidewalk. Pray for me?
CalloftheWild: If I ever get lost in the woods, I hope to have the same survival skills as a hamster. I joined a group for small pet owners. A lady posted that her hamster escaped & a month later, it climbed out of her couch unharmed as it had been living off of potato chips. Truly inspiring.
PurpleInsomniac: ah, the shit post harvest is bountiful this morning
Chapter Text
theROCK >>>> FuckOff
theROCK: Babe, we have to decide what to do on our date this weekend
FuckOff: THIS AGAIN?!
FuckOff: WHY CAN'T WE JUST GO TO THE MOVIES?!
theROCK: We always go to the movies!
theROCK: We should do something new and exciting
theROCK: I know!!!
theROCK: Let's go to that cat cafe not to far away from the dorms!
FuckOff: WHY THE FUCK WOULD I WANT TO GO TO A CAT CAFE?!?!?!
theROCK: I was talking to Denki the other day and he said that he had such a great time when Shinsou took him
FuckOff: I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THAT ELECTRIC RAT AND EYEBAGS PLAYED SOME PART IN THIS!!!!
theROCK: But, Kats, don't you want to drink coffee and pet cats?
FuckOff: I'D RATHER EAT GLASS!!!
theROCK: What about a picnic in the park?
FuckOff: What would that entail?
theROCK: You. Me. A huge blanket. And tiny sandwiches.
FuckOff: Pass
theROCK: Oh, come on!
theROCK: It sounded really cute when Midoriya told us about his picnic date with Todoroki
FuckOff: IF IT'S NOT DUNCE FACE AND EYEBAGS THEN IT'S FUCKING DEKU AND HALF AND HALF!!!
theROCK: It's nothing personal its just that everyone else gets to have cute dates but we only go to the movies!
[…]
FuckOff: You want a cute date?
theROCK: Not every date has to be cute….
theROCK: I just want a few cute dates of our own to show off to the others
FuckOff: I don't know why you care what others think about our relationship
FuckOff: But if you want a cute date then I'll give you a cute date
theROCK: I KNEW YOU'D COME AROUND!
FuckOff >>>> DekuDeku
Fuckoff: FUCKING DEKU!!!!
Fuckoff: YOU GOT ME INTO THIS CUTE DATE MESS AND NOW YOU'RE GOING TO HELP ME SWING THIS CUTE DATE OR YOU WON'T LIVE TO BE THE NUMBER ONE HERO!!!!!!!!!!
DekuDeku: Cute date huh?
FuckOff: SHUT THE FUCK AND HELP ME PLAN!!!!!!!!!
DekuDeku: What kind of cute date were you thinking?
FuckOff: NOTHING TO DO WITH CAT CAFES OR CUTE PICNICS WITH TINY SANDWICHES!!!!!!!!!
DekuDeku: Well, you set the bar pretty low so you have a lot to choose from
DekuDeku: Carnival/Festival date?
FuckOff: The next carnival/festival is at least a couple of months away
DekuDeku: Theme park? You can win Kirishima a prize and go on rides
FuckOff: Eh
DekuDeku: Listen class is about to start
DekuDeku: Meet after class and I'll give you a list of cute date ideas
Chapter Text
ListenHere >>>> momoyoro
ListenHere: I kind of feel bad for Ashido and Asui
momoyoro: What happened this time?
ListenHere: Nothing they're just being disaster lesbians
momoyoro: Ashido's bisexual
ListenHere: Are you sure?
momoyoro: Weren't you the one who walked in on her and Kaminari fucking?
ListenHere: Fine! Ashido and Asui were being a disaster bi and lesbian respectfully!
momoyoro: Why were they being a disaster bi and lesbian?
ListenHere: They spent the entire time we were supposed to be studying drooling over Uraraka
ListenHere: Honestly, I don't get it!
momoyoro: Oh, no?
ListenHere: What is that supposed to mean?
momoyoro: I'm pretty sure she had a thing for you earlier this year before we got together and before she started to talk to that mystery girl
ListenHere: WHAT
momoyoro: You didn't know?
ListenHere: NO
momoyoro: huh
ListenHere: It makes no difference to me now
momoyoro: Oh, really?
ListenHere: I mean you and I have a good thing going why would I care if some girl had a crush on me?
momoyoro: I can see why Ashido and Asui would be attracted to her after all she is a very pretty girl
ListenHere: Yeah
momoyoro: If we never got together would you have made a move?
ListenHere: uh
momoyoro: Come on, Kyoka, you can tell me the truth
ListenHere: I don't know
ListenHere: I don't think I'm her type
momoyoro: I've seen the way she looks at you
ListenHere: Excuse me?
momoyoro: Whenever she sees you in your leather jacket Uraraka gets this most sinful blush across her face
ListenHere: Momo
momoyoro: And I just know she'd be a good girl and get down on her knees for you
[…]
ListenHere: For the love of All Might you can't just say that kind of stuff to me
momoyoro: Why not?
momoyoro: It was okay for you to make me flustered the other day
ListenHere: You're going to be the death of me
momoyoro: But what a way to go
Chapter Text
PikaPikaBitch >>>> PurpleInsomniac
PikaPikaBitch: TOSH
PikaPikaBitch: TOSHI
PikaPikaBitch: HITOCHAN
PikaPikaBitch: HITOSHI
PurpleInsomniac: what
PikaPikaBitch: I had a really weird dream
PurpleInsomniac: are you sure you're not still having it?
PikaPikaBitch: Hitoshi!
PurpleInsomniac: what was your dream?
PikaPikaBitch: I dreamed that you were a cat
PurpleInsomniac: you woke me up from the best sleep i've had in a year to tell me you dreamed i was a cat?!
PikaPikaBitch: But it was really really weird
PikaPikaBitch: You were a cat obviously
PikaPikaBitch: Your furr was purple like your hair and you had bags underneath yours like in real life
PikaPikaBitch: But when you opened your mouth instead of meowing you talked
PikaPikaBitch: You said and I quote "Bold of you to assume I'm not God"
PurpleInsomniac: well i was dreaming of getting seven to eight hours of sleep uninterrupted by my loud blonde boyfriend
PikaPikaBitch: Then with that same hypnotic stare you reached up and put your paw on my mouth
PurpleInsomniac: fine that is pretty weird
PikaPikaBitch: Yeah
PikaPikaBitch: But cat you was really cute and your furr looked really soft
PurpleInsomniac: which was cuter? human me or cat me?
PikaPikaBitch: Hmm
PurpleInsomniac: really?
PikaPikaBitch: Cat you is cute but human you gives the best hugs
PurpleInsomniac: you think i give the best hugs?
PikaPikaBitch: Especially when you're wearing one of your big comfy sweaters
PurpleInsomniac: you only love me for my sweaters
PikaPikaBitch: Love?
PurpleInsomniac: uh
PikaPikaBitch: You're cute, Hitochan
PikaPikaBitch: Go back to sleep
Deku + Friends
IPutASpellOnYou: i know it's really really late but
IPutASpellOnYou: i told Denki he only loved me for my sweaters
IPutASpellOnYou: And instead of panicking he just called me cute and Hitochan then told me to go back to sleep
PrinceZukoButGayer: Ah yes late night gay panic
SmolBean: We haven't had a good late night gay panic since Ochaco started talking to Miko
fuckgravity: As if you didn't have just as much gay panic
PepetheFrog: What's going on?
fuckgravity: Go back to bed sweetie
PrinceZukoButGayer: Sweetie?
fuckgravity: We're here to talk about Shinsou not me
SmolBean: We'll talk about this later
Chapter 50
Notes:
SickBeats - Jirou
ZapAttack - Kaminari
BroccoliHead - Midoriya
BlackParade - Tokoyami
BabyShark - Kirishima
Chapter Text
GirlsGirlsGirls
BubblegumBitch: Who's interested in a girls day at the beach?!
Invisibitch: ME
DefyingGravity: Count me in!
RosietheRibbitor: A day at the beach sounds nice
momoyoro: I can show off my new bikini
ListenHere: I don't know
BubblegumBitch: Oh come on, Jirou, when was the last time you went on an outing?
ListenHere: I went with you guys when you went with to the mall
BubblegumBitch: That was two weeks ago!
Invisibitch: And you spent the entire time in Spencer's with Kaminari making fun of stuff!
BubblegumBitch: This would be just us girls!
ListenHere: Uh….
QueerTimes
SickBeats: CODE PINK
ZapAttack: What's code pink again?
BroccoliHead: Code Pink is gay panic lesbian edition
BroccoliHead: Code Blue is gay panic gay edition
BroccoliHead: And Code Purple is gay panic bi edition
ZapAttack: What gay panic of the lesbian variety are you going through, Kyouka?
BabyShark: Yes, let us help you, sis!
BlackParade: Is chat therapy okay or do you need group time?
SickBeats: I'm in the middle of doing homework so….chat therapy please!
BroccoliHead: What's the problem, Jirou?
SickBeats: I was in the group chat for 3A's girls that everyone knows about
BabyShark: Sure sure
SickBeats: Ashido suggested a girls day at the beach
BroccoliHead:That sounds nice
BroccoliHead: So what's the problem?
SickBeats: How is my bi ass supposed to have a nice day at the beach while being surrounded by a bunch of beautiful girls?!?!
BroccoliHead: Since it's technically a bi problem….Kaminari, you're up!
ZapAttack: HEYO
ZapAttack: So you have a bi problem!
ZapAttack: You've come to the right place!
BlackParade: Get to the point
ZapAttack: Yes, sir!
ZapAttack: This is a typical bi problem that I've had before so answer is simple
SickBeats: Which is???
ZapAttack: Act like you're not at the beach
SickBeats: Um, what?
ZapAttack: Just act like you would if you guys were in class or at the mall
SickBeats: So just act like I would if they weren't in bikinis?
ZapAttack: Yeah!
SickBeats: How do you give that kind of advice and still act like a bi mess?
ZapAttack: HEY
GirlsGirlsGirls
ListenHere: I'll go but I'm not wearing a bikini!
BubblegumBitch: I knew you'd come around!
Chapter Text
Invisibitch >>>> ListenHere
Invisibitch: Momo and I are at the concession stand and we want to know if you want anything
ListenHere: A water would be nice
Invisibitch: One water coming up!
ListenHere: Thank you
[…]
Invisibitch: So what's going on with you and Uraraka?
ListenHere: WHAT
Invisibitch: You blushed when you saw her in a bikini
ListenHere: I was not blushing!
Invisibitch: Yes, you were!
ListenHere: No, I wasn't!
Invisibitch: Yes, you were!
Invisibitch: Why would I lie about that?
ListenHere: FINE
ListenHere: I was blushing but not because of Uraraka
Invisibitch: Why were you blushing then?
ListenHere: Because you all are very pretty and you five look very pretty in your swimsuits
Invisibitch: oh
Invisibitch: Oh
Invisibitch: OH
BubblegumBitch >>>> ListenHere
BubblegumBitch: A little birdie told me that you think us girls are cute!
ListenHere: Goddamnit, Hagakure!
BubblegumBitch: You little disaster bi you!
ListenHere: I'm going to kill her!
BubblegumBitch: That explains why you're blushing all the time around us
ListenHere: I do not blush when I'm around you guys!
BubblegumBitch: Oh so that wasn't a blush when you saw Uraraka in that little pink thing?
ListenHere: I'm never going anywhere with you guys again!
BubblegumBitch: Oh, you're just saying that!
BubblegumBitch: Not that I blame you she has that whole girl next door thing going on
ListenHere: You guys are going to be the death of me!
BubblegumBitch: You're pretty too! You got that whole "Julia Stiles in Ten Things I Hate About You and Megan Fox in Jennifer's Body" vibe going on!
DefyingGravity >>>> ListenHere
DefyingGravity: Am I really that pretty?
ListenHere: Uraraka
DefyingGravity: I know you're with Momo and I've been talking to Himiko but….
DefyingGravity: I've always thought you were pretty too
ListenHere: Uraraka
DefyingGravity: Is that all you can say?
ListenHere: What do you want me to say?
DefyingGravity: Sometimes I fantasize about what I want you to do to me
ListenHere: Yeah?
DefyingGravity: Sometimes at night
DefyingGravity: Sometimes when I'm touching myself
ListenHere: What do you think about?
DefyingGravity: You all dressed up in leather making me behave like a good girl
ListenHere: Are you a good girl?
DefyingGravity: For you I am
ListenHere >>>> momoyoro
ListenHere: We need to talk
Chapter Text
Fuck Yeah! Class 1A!
PikaPikaBitch: uh….@TENya?
TENya: What can I do for you Kaminari?
PikaPikaBitch: Can you possibly tell Aizawa sensei that might not be in class for one to four weeks?
TENya: And why might you not be in class for one to four weeks?
cellofame: It's probably because of something embarrassing
BubblegumBitch: It has to be
ListenHere: He probably got his arm stuck in a vending machine
BubblegumBitch: OH
BubblegumBitch: Maybe he got one of his plugs stuck in him again!!!
DekuDeku: Plug?
FuckOff: I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD IF I HAVE TO TAKE HIM TO THE FUCKING ER AGAIN I'M GOING TO PUT HIM IN A COMA!!!
PurpleInsomniac: again?
theROCK: Relax, it's probably not that
ListenHere: Probably?
theROCK: After last time we specifically told him not to use it without supervision
PurpleInsomniac: been dating him for almost a year and im still learning new things about him
TENya: KAMINARI!!! AS YOUR CLASS PRESIDENT I MUST INSIST YOU GIVE ME A GOOD REASON TO SPEAK TO THE STAFF ON YOUR BEHALF IF YOU ARE NOT GOING TO BE ATTENDING CLASS!!!
PikaPikaBitch: Short version or long version?
ListenHere: It's definitely something embarrassing!
DekuDeku: Now now
DekuDeku: He might have good reason for possibly missing a months worth of school
[…]
DekuDeku: Kaminari, please tell me you have a good reason!
PikaPikaBitch: Some villain let loose some virus in the little town I was in waiting for my train and the authorities think I might have came in contact with it so they're quarantining me for the foreseeable future until they're 100% absolutely sure I don't have it
cellofame: That's a pretty good reason
ListenHere: Holy fuck, Denki!
TENya: I WILL LET SENSEI KNOW THE CIRCUMSTANCES OF YOUR ABSENCE!!!
TENya: PLEASE TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF!!!
PikaPikaBitch: I'll be fine, you guys!
FuckOff: YOU'RE NOT FINE, DENKI!!! YOU ARE LITERALLY QUARANTINED WHILE SOME MYSTERY VIRUS ATTACKS YOU!!!!!
PurpleInsomniac: denki?
PikaPikaBitch: You called me by my name…
PikaPikaBitch: AWW, BAKUGOU! YOU DO CARE!
Chapter Text
Fam
BuffDad: DENCHAN!!!!
BuffDad: I just heard the news!!!
BuffDad: Are you okay?!?!
ZappySon: Calm down, Vlad Dad, everything is fine
BuffDad: Denki….you're miles away quarantined in some town while a mysterious virus attacks you!!!
ZappySon: I mean they put me up in a nice bed and breakfast and I won't have to attend school for a week to a month so….
ZappySon: Everything is okay
ZappySon: I mean they let me have my phone back after disinfecting it plus this bed and breakfast has great wifi
BuffDad: Denki
ZappySon: If it makes you feel better then when I'm not quarantined you can mother hen me all you want
BuffDad: Does that mean that you'll let me give you forehead kisses and hugs without making jokes?
ZappySon: Yes, you will have twenty four hours to give me hugs and forehead kisses without me making jokes
BuffDad: Jeremiah and I will miss you
BuffDad: (picofjeremiahgivingthecamerapuppydogeyes.jpeg)
BuffDad: He got sad when I told him he won't be able to see you for a while
ZappySon: Stop! You're going to make me cry!
PurpleInsomniac >>>> PikaPikaBitch
PurpleInsomniac: denki
PikaPikaBitch: HITOCHAN!!!!!!!!!!!!
PurpleInsomniac: i hate that nickname
PikaPikaBitch: Would you rather I call you princess?
PurpleInsomniac: can you not be sexy for a hot second?
PikaPikaBitch: But Hitochan!!!
PikaPikaBitch: I'm bored!!!
PurpleInsomniac: you're quarantined you're supposed to be bored
PikaPikaBitch: Aww, but you're here now and I wanted some sexy times with you!
PurpleInsomniac: excuse me for not wanting to get sexy my boyfriend and love of my life is quarantined hundreds of miles away for god knows how long!
PikaPikaBitch: Love of your life, huh?
PurpleInsomniac: uh
PurpleInsomniac has left the chat
SexyTimes
PikaPikaBitch: @Fire&Ice @DekuDeku
Fire&Ice: Yes?
DekuDeku: We haven't used this chat in a while
DekuDeku: What's up?
PikaPikaBitch: I'M BORED!!!
Fire&Ice: You are quarantined
DekuDeku: I thought you said the purpose of this chat was and I quote "for sexy times"
PikaPikaBitch: Thanks for getting me back on track!!!
PikaPikaBitch: I'm bored and there's not much to do and well Hitoshi didn't want to get sexy but then he called me the love of his life and got all weird and left so now I'm here!
DekuDeku: We're going to unpack that later
Fire&Ice: So sexy times?
PikaPikaBitch: YES
PikaPikaBitch: Are you two interested?
Fire&Ice: I'm game
DekuDeku: Uh, I don't know
PikaPikaBitch: Oh come on, Midoriya! Have some fun!
DekuDeku: I'll just be in the way
PikaPikaBitch: You've literally watched Shouto fuck me into the mattress you won't be in the way!
DekuDeku: Yeah, but Shinsou was there
PikaPikaBitch: And out of the three of you I have fucked Shouto, currently fucking Hitoshi and you are the last of our foursome
DekuDeku: Kaminari
Fire&Ice: Babe, if you're not interested just say so no one will judge you
PikaPikaBitch: Yeah!!!
DekuDeku: Okay
PikaPikaBitch: FUCK YEAH!!!!
DekuDeku: How do we start this?
PikaPikaBitch: Shouto, care to start?
Fire&Ice: Tell me, sunflower, are you going to be a good boy for me?
PikaPikaBitch: I don't know I'm feeling pretty naughty
Fire&Ice: You were good for me the last time
PikaPikaBitch: I was putting on a show for Hitoshi
Fire&Ice: Don't you want to put on a show for Izuku?
Fire&Ice: Don't you want to show him you're a good boy?
PikaPikaBitch: You know, I do
Fire&Ice: You may act like a good boy but you're really a slut aren't you?
PikaPikaBitch: Yes
Fire&Ice: Yes what?
PikaPikaBitch: Yes sir
Fire&Ice: Good boy
Fire&Ice: Jump in when you feel comfortable, Zuku
[…]
DekuDeku: You looked so pretty when Shou was fucking you
PikaPikaBitch: I wasn't aware you were watching me I thought you were only watching Shouto?
DekuDeku: How could I not? You made the prettiest noises!
Fire&Ice: If you think Denki's noises were pretty you should have seen how wrecked he looked
PikaPikaBitch: What can I say? I'm a sucker for a good fucking!
Chapter Text
Bakusquad
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: @ZapZap you okay? Haven't heard from you in a day.
BabySharkDooDoo: Yeah, bro, what's going on?
AlienQueen: Guys, it's like seven in the morning! He's probably not even up yet!
LordExplosionMurder: WOULD YOU FUCKING IDIOTS CALM THE FUCK DOWN HE'S PROBABLY JACKING OFF OR SOMETHING!!!!!!
ZapZap: For the love of All Might you guys I'm fine!
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: Thank God
AlienQueen: How's the quarantine?
BabySharkDooDoo: Yeah, bro! What cool stuff are you doing to stay occupied?
BabySharkDooDoo: Does the hotel they put you up in have good tv?
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: And by good tv he means any saucy pay preview?
AlienQueen: He could be dying and you think he's watching bad porn?!
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: Yes
BabySharkDooDoo: Yeah
LordExplosionMurder: THIS IS SPARKY WE'RE TALKING ABOUT HERE!!!!! HE COULD BE ON HIS DEATHBED AND HIS LAST REQUEST WOULD BE TO JERK IT ONE LAST TIME!!!!!!!!
ZapZap: I'm fine
ZapZap: Quarantine is okay, the hotel they put me up in isn't fancy but it has good wifi connection
ZapZap: I miss you guys!
ZapZap: I also miss Vlad Dad and Jeremiah the Bulldog
ZapZap: Most importantly I miss Hitoshi
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: Yeah, you miss that dick!!!!
LordExplosionMurder: CAN WE TALK ABOUT SOMETHING OTHER THAN EYE BAGS AND HIS BRAINWASHING DICK?!?!
ZapZap: We can always talk about Kirishima's dick? Is it as big as he is? When he hardens does his dick harden too?
AlienQueen: Denki Kaminari asking the real questions!!!
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: You know our boy is always thinking about the D!!!
ZapZap: Hey, now! I think about the P too sometimes!
BabySharkDooDoo: That's not very manly, Denki!
ZapZap: You're right, bro! I mean V!
LordExplosionMurder: HOW ABOUT WE TALK ABOUT ICY HOT AND FUCKING DEKU'S DICK?!?!?!
AlienQueen: Oop
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: Uh
BabySharkDooDoo: Kats, maybe we should wait until when he's not quarantined to talk about this?
LordExplosionMurder: WHY SHOULDN'T WE?! DUNCE FACE JUST LOVES TALKING ABOUT DICK!!! LOVES IT SO MUCH THAT INSTEAD OF COMING TO US WE HE WANTS TO EXPLORE HE GOES TO SOMEONE ELSE!!!!!!
ZapZap: Bakugou
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: Are we doing this now?
AlienQueen: Looks like it
LordExplosionMurder: WHAT DO HALF AND HALF AND DEFENSELESS IZUKU HAVE THAT WE DON'T?!?! WE'VE BEEN BY YOUR SIDE LONGER THEN THEM LONGER THAN EYE BAGS!!! WHAT MAKES THEM SO GREAT?!?! ARE WE NOT ENOUGH?!?! AM I NOT ENOUGH?!?!
LordExplosionMurder: FUCK THIS!!! I'M OUT!!!
LordExplosionMurder has left the group chat
ZapZap: What was that?
AlienQueen: That was one jealous Blasty!
ZapZap: Jealous?
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: Your threeway fling with Todoroki and Midoriya have brought out some feelings in Bakubro that he's been trying to hide
ZapZap: What?
BabySharkDooDoo: Bakubabe wants to do the same thing with you that you did with Todoroki and Midoriya
Chapter Text
SexyTimes
PikaPikaBitch: @PurpleInsomniac @Fire&Ice @DekuDeku
PikaPikaBitch: I have a quick question for you guys
PurpleInsomniac: it's not sex related is it?
DekuDeku: Yeah, because the other day was really fun and all but I'm kinda in the middle of doing homework right now
Fire&Ice: I'm always game for sex atter all the group chat is called "SexyTimes"
PikaPikaBitch: It's not sex related you guys!
PurpleInsomniac: oh thank god
PurpleInsomniac: i mean not that i mind sex with you but this is a serious situation you're in right now
Fire&Ice: Eh, I could take it or leave it
DekuDeku: Shouchan!
Fire&Ice: What?
PikaPikaBitch: Do you guys think Bakugou is into me?
DekuDeku: …
PurpleInsomniac: …
Fire&Ice: …
PurpleInsomniac: im sorry what?
PikaPikaBitch: Well, I was chatting with the Bakusquad not too long ago and after a bit of teasing here and there you know the usual
PikaPikaBitch: Bakubro had an emotional outburst and the rest of the squad informed me that he didn't take us four fooling around lightly
Fire&Ice: Putting anything Bakugou does as a "outburst" is an understatement
DekuDeku: Not the time, Shou
PurpleInsomniac: what do you mean he didn't take it lightly?
PikaPikaBitch: He is jealous
PurpleInsomniac: jealous? of what? that he didn't get to also have a foursome?
PikaPikaBitch: No jealous because you three slept with ME
DekuDeku: I think I understand now
Fire&Ice: Denki, are you sure you don't wanna have sexy times?
DekuDeku: Really?
Fire&Ice: I'm going to be frank here
Fire&Ice: I don't give a rats ass how that firework with anger issues feels about us sleeping together
DekuDeku: I know that but right now what we need to do is help our friend here with any confusion he may be feeling
Fire&Ice: Fine, I'll put aside any ill feelings towards that emotionally stunted firework for Denki's sake
DekuDeku: Thank you
PikaPikaBitch: Hitoshi? Are you still there? You went quiet on me.
PurpleInsomniac: midoriya, you said you understood what's going on
PurpleInsomniac: care to explain?
DekuDeku: Well, it's no surprise that out of everyone in our class that Kacchan is closest to the Bakusquad
DekuDeku: If he wasn't then he wouldn't let them get away with hanging off of him and calling him "Bakubro" and "Bakubabe"
DekuDeku: So it's quite possible that he feels emotionally betrayed that Denki choose us two instead of himself or someone else from the Bakusquad to sleep with
PikaPikaBitch: So…is that a aye or a nay?
Fire&Ice: I think the real question is are you attracted to him/wished you slept with him instead of us?
DekuDeku: Denki, you don't have to answer that
PurpleInsomniac: no no
PurpleInsomniac: answer the question, denki
PikaPikaBitch: I think everyone is attracted to their friends at least a little bit
PikaPikaBitch: But if I'm going to be honest I'm glad you guys were my first foursome partners
DekuDeku: Really?
Fire&Ice: Really?
PurpleInsomniac: really?!
PikaPikaBitch: You two were gentle when it counted and that's what counts
PikaPikaBitch >>>> PurpleInsomniac
PikaPikaBitch: Hey
PurpleInsomniac: im sorry for getting all defensive when you brought up bakugou
PurpleInsomniac: i guess i was worried you would realise your true feelings or something and leave me
PikaPikaBitch: When I say that you're the best thing that has happened to me all my life I mean it
PikaPikaBitch: Because believe me when I say Bakubro is the LAST person I would leave you for
PurpleInsomniac: okay
PikaPikaBitch: But that doesn't mean I don't want to explore any physical attraction I have towards Bakugou and the Bakusquad
PikaPikaBitch: Because I do but I also want to continue what we have
PurpleInsomniac: i think i'll be okay with that as long as we still have our movie nights and weekend dates
PikaPikaBitch: So open relationship?
PurpleInsomniac: open relationship
PikaPikaBitch: You can sleep with other people now too you know
PurpleInsomniac: i don't know
PikaPikaBitch: Oh, please I've seen the way Izuku looks at you!
PurpleInsomniac: DENKI
Chapter Text
Deku + Friends
PepetheFrog: How's Kaminari doing in quarantine?
fuckgravity: Yeah, it's been a while since we heard from him!
ZoomZoom: PLEASE TELL ME KAMINARI DIDN'T BECOME A VICTIM OF THAT VIRUS!!!
PrinceZukoButGayer: Knowing Denki's luck he probably wasn't even in the affected area but got quarantined anyway
IPutASpellOnYou: uhhhhh
SmolBean: SHOUCCHAN!
SmolBean: Don't put that out into the universe!
PepetheFrog: You know when I or my siblings or my dad is stressed, my mom makes us a cup of tea and that calms us down
PepetheFrog: Shinsou, do you want a cup of tea?
IPutASpellOnYou: what kind of tea?
PepetheFrog: Would sleepy time tea be okay?
IPutASpellOnYou: yes, please
PepetheFrog: Be right back!
SmolBean: How's Denki doing, Hitocchan? I haven't talked to him in a minute.
IPutASpellOnYou: fine we talk every night before we go to bed
fuckgravity: Awwww!
IPutASpellOnYou: then i go to his dorm and sleep in his bed
PrinceZukoButGayer: I use to do that when Zuku went home on the weekends now I just steal his All Might onesie and wear it until he returns
SmolBean: THAT'S WAS YOU?!?!
IPutASpellOnYou: he has a pikachu onesie but it's too small for me
IPutASpellOnYou: i usually just make myself into a blanket burrito and smell his pillow
fuckgravity: Should I even ask what Kaminari's pillow smells like?
ZoomZoom: ELECTRICITY?
PrinceZukoButGayer: Axe body spray?
SmolBean: Memes?
IPutASpellOnYou: it smells like passion fruit
PrinceZukoButGayer: passion fruit, huh
fuckgravity: PASSION FRUIT?
ZoomZoom: PASSION FRUIT?!
SmolBean: PASSION FRUIT????
PepetheFrog: I'm back with tea!
IPutASpellOnYou: thank you, tsu
PepetheFrog: No, problem!
PepetheFrog: What did I miss?
fuckgravity: Apparently, Kaminari's pillow smells like passion fruit
PepetheFrog: Oh
IPutASpellOnYou: it's his shampoo
SmolBean: What?
IPutASpellOnYou: the reason why denki's pillow smells like passion fruit is because his shampoo is passion fruit-scented and he showers before going to bed
Chapter Text
Bakusquad
ZapZap: Let the shit posting commence!
LordExplosionMurder: Must we?
ZapZap: Come on, Bakubro!
ZapZap: I'm quarantined and I need entertainment!!!!
LordExplosionMurder: …
LordExplosionMurder: fine
ZapZap: YES!!!!
AlienQueen: Just set my vibrator to “kill”
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: I'm sitting naked on a chair with the air conditioning on and I think I may have lost my penis.
BabySharkDooDoo: I just put my sock on backwards if you’re looking for a gal who is just completely inept.
ZapZap: If I rented a car and drove deep into the woods and lived in said car in the woods would that be okay? Quarantine wise?
[…]
ZapZap: Come on, Bakubro, you promised!!!
BabySharkDooDoo: Yeah, babe, you promised!!!
LordExplosionMurder: miss me with this hereto couple “turns out we actually hate each other” quarantine drama. where are the accidental gays. the whoopsie-homos. where are the cooped-up roommates confessing their love over the day’s second pepperoni DiGiorno
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: FUCK YEAH
AlienQueen: Bakugou coming in clutch!
ZapZap: YEAH BOOOOOOOOOOI
BabySharkDooDoo: Atta boy!
ZapZap: when u r high and a cat lays on your tummy hell yes that’s the stuff
WhyVapeWhenYouCanTape: my favorite part about depression is you can go days even weeks feeling okay and then suddenly your brain is like, welp that’s enough of that, and then everything is gray again
BabySharkDooDoo: I don't do heights because I always wonder what it would be like to jump off and I don't trust myself not to do it.
AlienQueen: everybody's out here like "be gay do crimes" but pete buttigieg rigs ONE election and SUDDENLY,
LordExplosionMurder: if you see me crying in the FUCKING seasonal candy aisle of FUCKING walgreens you do not FUCKING talk to me
Chapter Text
PikaPikaBitch >>>> PurpleInsomniac
PikaPikaBitch: HITOSHI
PurpleInsomniac: denki
PikaPikaBitch: I'M BORED
PurpleInsomniac: hi bored, im dad
PikaPikaBitch: YOUR BOYFRIEND IS DYING OF BOREDOM AND YOU'RE TELLING DAD JOKES?!?!
PurpleInsomniac: you're not dying you're just being overdramatic
PikaPikaBitch: YES BECAUSE I'VE BEEN QUARANTINED IN BUMFUCK NOWHERE FOR ALMOST THREE WEEKS?!?!?!!?!!!??!?
PikaPikaBitch: DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH HERO TRAINING AND HOMEWORK AND SOCIALIZING I'VE BEEN MISSING OUT ON?!?!?!
PikaPikaBitch: I'LL PROBABLY HAVE TO BE HELD BACK A YEAR!!!
PurpleInsomniac: breathe, denki, breathe
PurpleInsomniac: you need to calm down
PikaPikaBitch: HOW CAN I CALM DOWN WHEN MY LIFE IS ON PAUSE WHILE EVERYONE ELSE IS MOVING ON WITHOUT ME?!?!?!
PikaPikaBitch has left the chat
PurpleInsomniac >>>> PikaPikaBitch
PurpleInsomniac: babe, talk to me
[…]
[…]
[…]
PurpleInsomniac >>>> DekuDeku
PurpleInsomniac: izuku can you please talk to denki
DekuDeku: Is he not talking to you?
PurpleInsomniac: i think the quarantine is getting to him
PurpleInsomniac: i want to know he's okay
DekuDeku: I'll see what I can do
DekuDeku >>>> PikaPikaBitch
DekuDeku: Hey, Denki!
DekuDeku: It's me Izuku!
DekuDeku: Just wondering how you're doing!
[…]
[…]
[…]
DekuDeku >>>> Fire&Ice
DekuDeku: Hey, Shoucchan?
DekuDeku: Can you talk to Denki?
Fire&Ice: Okay
Fire&Ice >>>> PikaPikaBitch
Fire&Ice: Sunflower?
Fire&Ice: 🌻🌻🌻🌻
[…]
[…]
[…]
Chapter 59
Notes:
For more content follow me at @loudblondeem
Chapter Text
Scrappy Doo Level Villains
MyBlueEyes: I can't believe I got FUCKING QUARANTINED!!!
HandsyMcFace: Terrible isn't it?
HandsyMcFace: You being gone for two weeks to a month
HandsyMcFace: Just terrible
MyBlueEyes: You better not fuck with my room!!!!!!
HandsyMcFace: Or what?
MyBlueEyes: Fuck you
HandsyMcFace: You'd like that wouldn't you?
[…]
HandsyMcFace: (picofshigholdingadildo.jpeg)
HandsyMcFace: Look what I found
MyBlueEyes: I told you not to fuck with my room!!!
HandsyMcFace: What would you use something like this for?
MyBlueEyes: …
HandsyMcFace: No need to be quiet
HandsyMcFace: You like making noise, don't you?
MyBlueEyes: I don't know what you're talking about
HandsyMcFace: Don't you?
HandsyMcFace: All those nights I've heard you moaning
HandsyMcFace: Must have been my imagination
MyBlueEyes: What do you want?
HandsyMcFace: You know what I want
HandsyMcFace: I want you underneath me taking my fingers like you take that toy
MyBlueEyes: Shigaraki
HandsyMcFace: What's my name?
MyBlueEyes: Tomura
HandsyMcFace: That's a good boy
MyBlueEyes: Fuck
HandsyMcFace: You must be so wet and wanting
HandsyMcFace: How many fingers can you take?
MyBlueEyes: Three
HandsyMcFace: You'll take four
MyBlueEyes: I'll be so full
HandsyMcFace: It will be a stretch but you'll be too busy making those pretty noises for me
MyBlueEyes: Will you give me your dick?
HandsyMcFace: Don't be a greedy slut!
MyBlueEyes: I guess I'll just have to fuck myself with my toy then
HandsyMcFace: You'll do no such thing!
MyBlueEyes: And how will you stop me?
HandsyMcFace: I'll destroy it!
MyBlueEyes: I can always just get another one
MyBlueEyes: Or better yet
MyBlueEyes: Hawks is always up for the task
HandsyMcFace: The only dick you'll be taking is mine!
Chapter Text
PurpleInsomniac >>>> PikaPikaBitch
PurpleInsomniac: i'll undress you 'cause you're tired
PurpleInsomniac: cover you as you desire
PurpleInsomniac: may not have the fancy things
PurpleInsomniac: but i'll give you everything
PurpleInsomniac: you could ever want, it's in my arms
PikaPikaBitch: Huh?
PurpleInsomniac: so baby tell me yes
PurpleInsomniac: and i will give you everything
PurpleInsomniac: so baby tell me yes
PurpleInsomniac: and i will be all yours tonight
PurpleInsomniac: so baby tell me yes
PurpleInsomniac: and i will give you everything
PurpleInsomniac: i will be right by your side
PikaPikaBitch: Babe?
PurpleInsomniac: if i can't find the cure
PurpleInsomniac: i'll fix you with my love
PurpleInsomniac: no matter what you do
PurpleInsomniac: i'll fix you with my love
PurpleInsomniac: and if you say you're okay
PurpleInsomniac: i'm gonna heal you anyway
PurpleInsomniac: promise i'll always be there
PurpleInsomniac: promise i'll be the cure
PikaPikaBitch: Babe…
PikaPikaBitch: (selfieofdenkibeginningtocry.jpeg)
PurpleInsomniac: rub your feet, your hands, your legs
PurpleInsomniac: let me take care of it, babe
PurpleInsomniac: close your eyes, i'll sing your favorite song
PurpleInsomniac: i wrote you this lullaby
PurpleInsomniac: hush now baby, don't you cry
PurpleInsomniac: anything you want could not be wrong
PikaPikaBitch: Oh, Toshi!
PurpleInsomniac: if i can't find the cure
PurpleInsomniac: i'll fix you with my love
PurpleInsomniac: promise i'll be the cure
PikaPikaBitch: You remembered!
PurpleInsomniac: well...every time i'm having a hard time you always sing Lady Gaga's The Cure to me
PikaPikaBitch: When I get out of here I'm never letting you out of my sight!
PurpleInsomniac: i think i can live with that
Chapter 61
Notes:
I'M ALIVE!!!
Chapter Text
SexyTimes
PurpleInsomniac has temporarily removed PikaPikaBitch from the chat
PurpleInsomniac has added ListenHere, FuckOff, theROCK, BubblegumBitch, cellofame to the group chat
FuckOff: WHY THE FUCK WAS I ADDED TO A GROUP CHAT CALLED SEXY TIMES?!?!?!
ListenHere: While I appreciate being thought of but…why?
BubblegumBitch: SHINSOU!!! YOU SLY DOG!!!
cellofame: Can this wait? I'm in the middle of a mean bong rip
theROCK: Hey, Shinsbro!
DekuDeku: Uh, Shinsou?
DekuDeku: What's going on?
Fire&Ice: Isn't it obvious? Shinsou wants to expand his sexual horizons!
ListenHere: I'm sorry
ListenHere: What?
PurpleInsomniac: great the gangs all here
FuckOff: WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?!?!
BubblegumBitch: Technically, the gangs not all here because we're sans Denki
PurpleInsomniac: that's actually why i gathered you all here today
PurpleInsomniac: a little birdie told me that Denki is getting released from quarantine in a couple of days and i figured we could do something fun
cellofame: Can't he read this since he's a part of this PARTICULAR chat?
PurpleInsomniac: i temporarily removed him from this chat so we could plan
DekuDeku: Shouldn't we take this to the class group chat if we're planning a party?
PurpleInsomniac: it's not a party per say
theROCK: What's that supposed to mean?
Fire&Ice: They're not going to pick up what you're laying down if you don't spell it out for them
Fire&Ice: They are the Bakusquad after all
FuckOff: WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN YOU FUCKING CANDY CANE LOOKING BITCH?!?!?!
PurpleInsomniac: you all know how...physical denki can get
theROCK: Yeah! He gives the best hugs!
cellofame: He's always down to cuddle if I have a bad high!
BubblegumBitch: When I get touch starved he lets me hang off him
FuckOff: YOU FUCKING IDIOTS!!!!!
FuckOff: EYE BAGS IS TALKING ABOUT FUCKING!!!!!!
Fire&Ice: Didn't expect the Pomeranian with anger issues to be the one in the group with the brain cell
ListenHere: Aren't you and Denki in a relationship?
DekuDeku: Shinsou, would you really be okay with what you're hinting at?
PurpleInsomniac: denki and i talked and we agreed that it would be okay to have a open relationship
PurpleInsomniac: what with him being polyamorous and everything
BubblegumBitch: Right on ✊
PurpleInsomniac: so i thought we could have an orgy or something the night he returns
ListenHere: I'm happy you thought of me but…
PurpleInsomniac: you're hopelessly devoted to momo
ListenHere: We sort of have our own thing going on right now
ListenHere: Raincheck?
Fire&Ice: As someone who's witnessed sunflowers sexual stamina I can sure you there will be more
cellofame: sunflower?
theROCK: Sunflower??
BubblegumBitch: sUNFLOWER???
ListenHere: I'm sorry...what?
FuckOff: WHAT THE FUCK IS ALL THIS FUCKING SUNFLOWER BUSINESS ABOUT????????
PurpleInsomniac: if you must know denki and shouto have become closer so of course nicknames are exchanged
BubblegumBitch: SHOUTO???
PurpleInsomniac: that previous foursome had struck up some feelings between denki and shouto
PurpleInsomniac: so since then they've had more hookups
PurpleInsomniac: with me in the room of course
FuckOff: MISTER HIGH AND MIGHTY IS BEING FUCKING CUCKHOLDED BY HIS BOYFRIEND AND FUCKING HALF AND HALF?!?!
FuckOff: THIS IS FUCKING GOLD!!!!
Fire&Ice: I think that's quite enough Bakugou
Fire&Ice: No need to be an asshole, we all know you've been a jealous bitch since Denki slept with Izuku and I!
Fire&Ice: Hell, since he got with Hitoshi! Isn't that right...Bakugou?
Chapter Text
Fam
BuffDad: DENCHAN!
BuffDad: ARE YOU EXCITED TO BE OUT OF QUARANTINE AND ON YOUR WAY HOME?!
BuffDad: YOU AND SHINSOU HAVE SOMETHING PLANNED FOR YOUR FIRST NIGHT TOGETHER IN THE LAST SIX MONTHS???
ZappySon: I actually didn't tell him I was coming home
[...]
BuffDad: what
ZappySon: I know I should have told him and my friends but…
BuffDad: But...
ZappySon: Things are different now I can't explain it they just are
BuffDad: You two haven't broken up have you?
ZappySon: VladDad, things change when you spend six months quarantined
BuffDad: He's going to find out sooner or later and it should come from you
ZappySon: I'll tell him…
ZappySon: Eventually…
ZappySon: After a week or soon
BuffDad: Denki
ZappySon: I just want to settle in and get used to normal life before doing anything
BuffDad: As long as you come to me if something upsets you
ZappySon: Will do
PikaPikaBitch >>>> MyBlueEyes
PikaPikaBitch: Just wanted to let you know I'm back in town
MyBlueEyes: They finally let your bitch ass out of quarantine?
PikaPikaBitch: I guess I was too expensive to keep around
MyBlueEyes: They could give you cheap ramon and you would stay, Denki
PikaPikaBitch: Maybe you should come up with better insults, Dabi
MyBlueEyes: You should be thank you that they let you go home
PikaPikaBitch: Shit...you're still quarantined?
MyBlueEyes: Something about a compromised immune system I don't know
PikaPikaBitch: That sucks ass
MyBlueEyes: Well, you know what they say you are what you eat and all
MyBlueEyes: But I guess that's not true now that you're playing bottom bitch to that dude with mad scientist hair
PikaPikaBitch: hE DOES NOT HAVE MAD SCIENTIST HAIR
MyBlueEyes: Though he'd have to be mad to stick around you for so long
MyBlueEyes: Has he figured out what a massive slut you are?
PikaPikaBitch: He doesn't mind my insatiable sexual appetite
MyBlueEyes: Using big words now?
MyBlueEyes: By the way, tell Shouto I said hey
Chapter 63
Notes:
CounselorWoofWoof - Hound Dog
DocRecovery - Recovery Girl
Space13
Chapter Text
Scrappy Doo Level Villains
HandsyMcFace: WHAT THE FUCK, DABI????
MyBlueEyes: It's four in the fucking morning! Can we do this later?
SmokeDaddy: Yes, Tomura, can we do this later?
SassyChickenNugget: Yeah some of us need our beauty sleep
MyBlueEyes: If that's the case then you're gonna need more than seven hours
SassyChickenNugget: HEY
SmokeDaddy: Can we all just go back to sleep?
HandsyMcFace: NOT UNTIL DABI EXPLAINS WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS GOING ON???????
SassyChickenNugget: Can we get more context to the question?
MyBlueEyes: Of course not
SmokeDaddy: tomura?
SmokeDaddy: tomura!
SmokeDaddy: Tomura
SmokeDaddy: TOMURA
SmokeDaddy: Hey buddy?
SmokeDaddy: Maybe calm down and I don't know explain whats going on?
HandsyMcFace: I WAS GOING THROUGH THAT FUCK FACES PHONE AND HE HAS SOME EXPLAINING TO DO!!!
MyBlueEyes: you went through my phone?
SmokeDaddy: You went through his phone?
SassyChickenNugget: *sweats nervously*
HandsyMcFace: WHY, AND I CAN'T STRESS THIS ENOUGH, THE FUCK DO YOU HAVE SIX PEOPLE IN YOUR PHONE CALLED HOE #1 - 6????
MyBlueEyes: Uh….
MyBlueEyes has left the chat
Off Brand Justice League
CounselorWoofWoof: @OffBrandDracula
CounselorWoofWoof: As Kaminaris guardian how is he coping with quarantine?
OffBrandDracula: Uh actually the doctors gave him the okay and he's been home for the past couple of days
CounselorWoofWoof: Excellent! Should we be expecting him back tomorrow or…?
OffBrandDracula: I was actually hoping he could come back on monday?
OffBrandDracula: You know...let him adjust to being back?
DocRecovery: How is young Kaminari doing?
OffBrandDracula: The doctors gave him the all-clear and since he really hasn't been in contact with anyone infected they said he should be okay
OffBrandDracula: Jeremiah and I are very happy to have him back!
DocRecovery: No you silly man! I meant his mental health!
OffBrandDracula: I'm sorry?
Space13: A boy his age shouldn't be isolated for such a long time
Space13: Studies on isolation shows significant increases in anxiety and panic attacks, increased levels of paranoia, and being less able to think clearly
OffBrandDracula: That would explain what he said when he first told me he was coming home
DocRecovery: What did he say?
OffBrandDracula: He told me not to tell anyone he was back home
OffBrandDracula: His friends don't even know he's back!
CounselorWoofWoof: For the sake of Young Kaminaris mental health I implore you seek help for him!
Chapter Text
PikaPikaBitch >>>> PurpleInsomniac
PikaPikaBitch: Hey...Toshi
PurpleInsomniac: hey, kitten, how's quarantine?
PikaPikaBitch: Well, you see I'm no longer under quarantine I'm actually back home
PurpleInsomniac: REALLY???
PurpleInsomniac: WHAT ARE YOU DOING RIGHT NOW???
PurpleInsomniac: LET'S HANG OUT!!!
PikaPikaBitch: I can't hang out right now because I have an important appointment today...
PikaPikaBitch: But tomorrow we can do whatever
PurpleInsomniac: what kind of important appointment?
PikaPikaBitch: Vlad Dad thinks I should talk to someone after spending so much time in quarantine
PurpleInsomniac: therapy is an important appointment
PurpleInsomniac: im proud of you
GirlsGirlsGirls
Invisibitch: You know for as many girls nights and outings and all the time we spend talking on here we never asked the most important question
RosietheRibbitor: And what is that kero?
momoyoro: Yeah, I thought we got all the important questions out of the way?
Invisibitch: Well, we did except the other day I heard some people discuss pro heroes
ListenHere: Get to the point
Invisibitch: Jirou, which hero would you fuck?!?!
BubblegumBitch: THIS GOING TO BE GOOD
DefyingGravity: Uh…
ListenHere: You're telling me that you pulled me away from guitar practice to ask me which hero I would fuck?!
Invisibitch: Answer the question and you can go back to your guitar
[…]
ListenHere: Fine
ListenHere: Midnight, Mt. Lady, Ryukyu, and Miruko
BubblegumBitch: Isn't Tsuyu and Uraraka interning with Ryukyu?
ListenHere: That's it! I'm out of here!
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