Balance or Nothing

by Sin_of_the_Fallen

Summary:

"There must be balance...or nothing." When Ixis kills Alduin there is no longer a balance between them, so they are kicked out of Tamriel... Into Alagaesia. And they are bound together by destiny. In Alagaesia. Where bonds equal Dragon and Rider...
For Annonimous4862
--------------
Yeah, what can I say? I blame Annonimous4862.

Chapter 1: Exodus

Ixis awoke with a sharp gasp, red eyes fluttering wide open. She was curled up on her side, on the ground, in the fetal position.

Alduin.

The thought blasted her fully awake, and she immediately pushed herself up to sit straight. The abrupt movement caused black spots to dance on her vision, forcing her to close eyes and take a deep breath. She placed a cool hand to her forehead when she felt a headache coming. It took her quite a while to get herself together, more than enough time for her to notice she felt sore all over and that her mouth tasted like cave mushrooms.

When she finally got over the overall feeling of being stomped by a mammoth, she looked around to see she was in some unknown forest. How did she get there? When she entered Sovngarde, she had assumed if she ever returned, it would be to the same area, to find Odahviing waiting for her. Ixis frowned in confusion, reflexively tightening her grip on something she'd been unconsciously holding, and tried to remember.

She alone had slain Alduin, the three interlopers righteously cut down by the enraged dragon. Neither of the two had appreciated the inconvenient intruders trying to interfere with the fight they had been waiting for their entire lives, and the World-Eater had simply acted on their mutual displeasure.

The battle had been long – even within the timeless realm it had seemed to drag on into eternity. Ixis had brought sword, poison, magick and bow to bear on Alduin along with her Thu'um but he simply... matched her. She would Shout and he would fly away, he would call forth meteors and Ixis would scamper off to use her bow from far off. She couldn't have imagined they would be equals on the battlefield, but Sovngarde had proven them both wrong on that account.

Though they had sought to kill each other, at first it must have seemed like they had planned out a mock-battle. They both sensed what the other was about to do and smoothly countered it. It was damn annoying. Thankfully for her, she had found favor with the Prince of Luck despite the issue over claiming her soul.

Two lucky arrows blinded Alduin, and while he thrashed and screamed curses and Thu'um, she had exercised her good fortune and crawled onto the Dragon God's back. By all the Aedra and Daedra, Alduin had not liked- "Being ridden like some mortal's pony!"He started to try to fly while blinded, forcing Ixis into the actual business of Dragon riding, and unlike how she had ridden right behind Odahviing's head, Ixis only got as far as the base of Alduin's neck.

His general spikiness had provided her with plenty of handholds to hold onto, and after five minutes of barrelrolling, Alduin realized flying blind was idiotic since she was not going to fall off. As soon as he landed and started to make like he was going to roll on the ground, Ixis clambered up his neck and drove her sword to the hilt into his skull. She also pulled out her bow and proceeded to have several Sunhallowed arrows explode in Alduin's skull.

That was when she accidentally exploded herself off the dragon's head, and then the world went black and she knew no more.

She blinked a bit. Had she won?

Her attention was yanked to more immediate matters when something started squeaking and rocking in her arms. Ixis looked down in bewilderment. What on Nirn was she holding, and why was she cradling it like it was an Eye? She scrutinized it. It was an oval stone, and she had somehow embraced it without ever knowing it. She put it down right in front of her and observed the odd moving squeaking stone.

It was an obsidian colored rock rippled with scarlet veins, and she thought she could pick out gold specks. She touched it with a finger; it was warm and as smooth as Dwemer metal. But what sort of stone or gem produces its own warmth?

Ixis squinted crimson eyes and tilted her head slightly. In fact... She thought it looked rather sort of egg-like. Though she had no idea what would lay such an egg and then somehow curl her unconscious body around it – or why do it on first place. It was curious, and Ixis could not resist the temptation to not do the sensible thing and back off. She decided to see what would hatch, and her gut was telling her this was a most excellent idea.

The stone egg cracked with no warning about two minutes later, and the sound reminded Ixis of splitting boulders open with her pickaxe to find ore. And then something wet and upset burst out from the cracked shell. She couldn't tell what it was yet, since the poor cub was all tangled up in itself. She watched quietly as it picked itself up, stumbling and trembling from the strain of moving, and met its gaze.

Ixis made a low distressed sound, feeling as if someone had ripped out the foundation of her world.

A stunned baby Alduin was looking at her in wonder. He looked different, smaller and with four legs instead of wing-arms, but he possessed the burning orange eyes that only the World Eater had been graced with. He blinked at her and she blinked back, neither quite believing what was happening.

She was struck with an inexplicable urge to curl around the dragonling and lavish affection on him, her heart threatening to revolt at the sheer cuteness Alduin exhaled like he had once done with dominance. That was hands down the most adorable thing she had ever seen: Alduin was wearing a piece of shell like a dapper cap as he tried to stare her down.

The hell?

The reasonable part of her protested that this was her nemesis, but the unnatural maternal instincts she hadn't known she possessed were much stronger. She was one hundred per cent sure that Alduin must have been made for snuggling, not destroying, and was about to enact said snuggling when the dragon spoke.

"Zu'u lost daal."

I have returned. His voice squeaked like that of a trodden upon mouse.

Ixis could not help but coo softly Dragonish purrs at how Alduin was trying to be mighty. Why had she despised him again? He was much too cute for such nonsense! She reached out to bring him to her, but as soon as her left hand touched his head the world exploded with light and far too much mental pain.

Chapter 2: Bound

Notes:

In my game, Ondolemar is sorta buggy. He will swear by the Nine, specifically, so I didn't make it up. It's funny to hear him say it.

 

When she touched Alduin with her hand a rush of energy traveled up through her arm to engulf her entire body and mind. The energy was burning, freezing, electrifying, all consuming, and nothing simultaneously. Ixis could feel it reach through her mental barriers into the very core of her mind and began to forge a connection to something she knew she could never break. But it did not stop there. The energy flowed ever inwards to touch her Dovah Sil and began to... Alter it. Ixis felt her mind shrieking in terror as her soul was bound to another's.

 

Soon the energy began to recede, and she could feel another's terror and outrage as well as her own emotions, hear the shouting of another mind. Ixis felt both her horror and the other's at what had been done to them. And as suddenly as it had struck, the energy vanished, leaving behind only the bond that seemed to fill her head and heart to the brim. Ixis let out a broken whimper as sensation returned to her body.

 

She was shivering uncontrollably, her hand was numb, and the skin over her heart itched and burned. Ixis felt her pointed ears twitch as a pitiful sound rose in both reality and her mind. Alien pain and alarm surged into her thoughts as the other mind came out of its own pain. Ixis' alarm began to overwhelm her as suspicion crept in. While she had never communicated with her mind to another's, she knew how to do it and how to defend against intrusion.

 

Alduin? Is that you?' A snort echoed along the bond even as the dragonling shook his head as he attempted to stand again. Good to know Vruuni Ronit can still recognize me, despite this.

 

Ixis felt panic welling up within her, but as always humor overrode distress to poke fun at Alduin.

 

 "Your destined rival" Alduin?'

 

Alien alarm washed over her. How did you hear that?! I did not speak!'

 

Ixis gave a grim smile to the startled dragonling as his head reared back.

 

Look at my lips Alduin. They're not moving, nor are yours. Drem yol lok Alduin, welcome to this bond and to my mind, emotions, and soul. This time Alduin's wings rose and mantled above him, trying to seem more fearsome in light of a threat. She watched him, curiously calm despite the bizarre circumstances, as he made sure to speak aloud. Ixis could feel how natural it was to the both of them to continue conversing via the bond, but she attempted to fight the urge even as Alduin spoke.

 

Rah Wahlaan! What is this insanity Dovahkiin?! Why can you commune with me, the World Eater, with your mind? Why can I feel your emotions, your Dovah Sil?!

Ixis grimaced, watching as Alduin came ever closer as if she was exerting some sort of pull on him, and felt herself leaning forwards to touch him. Her mind warred silently behind multiple shields, the strange emotions fighting against her natural self. She tried to ignore how Alduin could feel her own confusion and frustrated fear, along with how their emotions merged and became one.

 

She spoke slowly, focusing on doing it verbally instead of telepathically. "I don't know Alduin, but I don't think the Aedra or Daedra are going to help us now. Can't you feel this bond, and how deep it runs, Al-Du-In?"

 

She pronounced the Thu'um of his name, a silent wave of pressure rushing out of her mouth, to highlight the deeper nature of his Name.

 

Ziil gro dovah ulse. The weight of her words, "Your soul is bound to mine for eternity," threatened to shake the world and consume Alduin under their weight.

 

Ixis again waited calmly – too calmly, a part of her muttered – as Alduin plunged into the bond head first. He dove deeply, reaching the core of the link anchored in the center of their beings, and her soul pulsed in recognition of his. The World Eater roared indignantly and on every level Ixis perceived him, unable to accept he was now partnered to his enemy.

 

She watched with a wince as Alduin completely lost control of himself. The dragonling began tearing at the ground, screaming cries too full of emotion to put into words. A part of her noted his rage was aimed nowhere near her; then, the tsunami of his mind, emotions, and soul thundered through the bond. Ixis began drowning on him and retreated to her haven, her mental rock, clinging with ferocious tenacity, as Alduin began to consume what was "Ixis."

 

She thought of Odahviing, how he had carried her through the skies, and how he had shared the pleasure that was flying. She thought of Parthunax, the wise old dragon, and how he carried such sorrow and regret she could not comprehend how he still functioned. She thought of Ondolemar, the too merciful Thalmor and how he had once said "By the Nine!" She thought of Brynjolf, the thief who made her laugh, and how she had left him Dragon Tongue flowers as a silent apology for going to fulfill her life's purpose. She thought of them all, along with her other friends, her followers, and her lycanthropes and vampires. Ixis clung and remembered, wrapping herself in her memories to deflect Alduin.

 

Eventually the World Eater's rage subsided, leaving only weary and reluctant acceptance. The dragon, now tired, gave into the urge to crawl into Ixis' lap and refused to acknowledge how right it felt to do so.

 

"Dovahkiin?" He queried sharply as she did not respond at all to his relocation. He felt alarm, rearing up to hold her shoulders with his new limbs as his wings flared from his back to balance him.

 

Alduin looked into her unfocused red eyes and shouted "Dovahkiin!"

 

He shook her as best he could, but she still did not respond.

 

Eyes narrowing, Alduin succumbed to the urge to call to her via the bond. Dovahkiin! A slow thought eventually brushed his mind, like a touch so light he would have had to have it on his wing membranes to feel it. ...Alduin? Are you calm again?'

 

He huffed, a small puff of acrid black smoke emerging to tickle Ixis' nose. Yes. He felt the bond open again; he had been unaware it had closed, and it felt like regrowing a lost wing.

 

What was that Dovahkiin? You were...gone. Her eyes refocused and met his, allowing his alarm to fade slightly. Your emotions. I could feel them perfectly, but the amount threatened to overload me. I retreated to a safe haven to withstand your storm. Luckily it worked, and it seems my sanity suffered little harm. Perhaps the bond shields our minds against such damage to each other?' Alduin began to settle into her lap.

 

Perhaps. Who knows? Father must have had a hand in this though, there is none who would dare to alter his children...

 

Ixis wrapped her arms around him, unconsciously offering comfort, and Alduin refused to acknowledge the sense of content happiness he felt at her embrace. "Let's not do that again shall we? Much too unpleasant for this Mer." He snorted again, and could not stop the thought, Foolish elf.

 

Ixis laughed at his thought and all was well, until she replied, "At least I haven't shrunk, O mighty World Eater!" Alduin growled at her unreservedly and nipped her hand sharply, purposefully thinking this time, Of all the joore to be Dovahkiin, I am stuck with a stupid one.

 

She laughed even harder and poked fun at him again, grateful that they were getting along. Alduin bantered back, along with another nip, and they settled into the pattern. It was the only soothing thing in this whole ridiculous situation.

Chapter 3: Abandon

 

Ixis crouched silently, watching intently as a herd of deer grazed several yards away in a clearing. Moonlight gave everything an otherworldly sheen, but she could still see perfectly fine.

 

Usually Ixis bought or stole whatever food she needed, but without knowing where she was, she didn't want to risk having a hungry Alduin on her hands. He was already grumpy enough, in her humblest opinion. Anxiously she set to watching the herd, trying to read their movements.

 

She had never hunted before, and since she could not risk using her bow due to its enchantments, she was going to attempt to use magic. Divines and Princes help her.

 

She began to charge her hands with lightning, preparing two Bolts, and picked out a particularly large clump of deer. Their heads lifted from their grazing, ears swiveling to pinpoint the crackling sound and noses snuffling to seek out the origin of the ozone smell. Seeing her chance slipping away, Ixis tossed the two Bolts and hoped Hircine had let her aim true.

 

Agonized screams ripped their way out from the deer hit by the lightning spells, and they shortly fell down. Ixis only had a moment to be shocked that the spells had not backfired before the panicked flock started to stampede away from the fallen pair and right at her. She cursed Hircine as she attempted to gather magicka for a Familiar to herd the deer, but she found her energy had not recharged enough to summon the ghostly wolf. Having no other choice, Ixis Shouted "Fus Ro!"

 

The animals either swerved out of the way or were staggered by the Thu'um, but they were now panicking to get away from Ixis. The herd quickly regrouped and ran from the clearing loudly, leaving behind a relieved Dragonborn and her dead prey. She snorted as she felt Alduin's focus shift to her and his mild curiosity trickled down through the bond.

 

Nothing big. Just learned I'm a terrible hunter. Don't know why Hircine lets me be his Champion.

 

Another way you prove inferior to me, joore.

 

She rolled her eyes, knowing he would sense the equivalent emotion.

 

Yeah. And remind me again who's taking care of your sorry self? Me! Unless you want to eat lichen-

 

Silence joore!

 

Ixis snickered at him as she made her way across the clearing to the deer carcasses.

 

She started to gut the deer, pulling a basket out of her Inventory, and felt the tiny bit of magicka it consumed to return the item to its proper size. She'd paid the College to enchant the bag so that it miniaturized objects put inside it and enlarged items taken out, and it had been completely worth the twenty thousand gold.

 

Humming softly she put the entrails in the basket for Alduin and began to cull the venison off the bones. It was difficult but necessary work. Alduin had already eaten all the food she'd obtained in Sovngarde.

 

Once the meat was out into Inventory, Ixis swiftly skinned the deer and put their hides away. A small bit of anxiety at having left the tiny dragon alone for so long nipped at her, and whether it was hers or Alduin's she could not tell. He had just been reborn and he was still trying to adjust to the alterations of his spikey body.

 

This was likely the most vulnerable Alduin had ever been in his entire existence, and Ixis was intimately connected to him. She pondered the thought as the tedious work let her mind wander. He was once her greatest foe, still was her rival, but they were unavoidably allied and partners now.

 

Done with her hunting and her musings, Ixis sped her way back to their clearing with all due haste. She was no longer content to leave Alduin alone without shelter. Even as she ran across the mountain she made plans. They needed to find some sort of cave and prepare a base of operations.

 

---

 

 

She looked around the cave in satisfaction, thankful that they had finally found a cavern that could house a fully grown Alduin once he became as big as he had been. In the month they'd been in these mountains, Ixis and Alduin had searched more than twenty possible shelters, with Alduin pessimistically pointing out fatal flaws in each. He had been incredibly aggravating and smug the entire time, and Ixis had near throttled the baby dragon.

 

The dragon walked over to and she watched as the wolf sized beast gracefully picked his way over the boulders that littered his path. It had taken him quite a while to adjust to having four proper legs, and he still forgot to tightly fold his wings to his back, but walking had come much faster than flying.

 

With four legs Alduin found he needed to completely relearn how to take off and land. His hind legs had proven to be too muscled, which upset his balance, and his front legs were still not as strong as they should be. Ixis had helped as much as his pride would let her while the World Eater was still tiny, but as he grew he rebuffed further help with a snarl.

 

"I must learn on my own, Dovahkiin. You cannot help me during battle."

 

While his words had had truth to them, Ixis had also noticed his progress had slowed considerably. Alduin simply could not do all the exercises Ixis had shown him for developing muscle in his legs, and those he could were awkward without assistance. But that had not dissuaded Alduin.

 

They had spent the next day arguing on and off over her name and Alduin's reluctance to use it. As usual, Ixis had pushed him into the blind rage he was afflicted with. He had grouched about it for several hours, some part of him fueling the petty grudge. Thankfully once she let him mock her hunting skills and magical prowess the air cleared.

 

But now that they had finally found a place that met their requirements, Ixis could finally get down to making a proper hideout. In her excitement she tried to include Alduin in the work, forgetting the dragon had never done a day's labor. She had naively thought he would like to be part of the process of getting comfortable.

 

"Hey Alduin! Incinerate every inch of this cave! We need it clean before I can start putting in flooring and furniture."

 

Alduin tried to stare her down, and Ixis felt the now familiar amusement at his failed attempt. The stubborn dragon had yet to give up his habit of literally looking down on her.

 

"I'm not going to waste my Thu'um in burning this cave clean. You do it. I'll go get the supplies."

 

Ixis put on her best hybrid between a smirk and a Thalmor Sneer™, and as Alduin was about to leave her, she lazily drawled out a sentence that would get him to see her way.

 

"I should've known the World Eater didn't have the endurance anymore to do something as simple as burning a cave. But it's probably for the best that you get the stuff, else we would be stuck outside for at least a couple more days. You go get the stuff, I'll have it done by the time you get back."

 

Alduin stopped in his tracks, and Ixis did not need to feel his indignant anger and offended pride to know she had him.

 

"You think you can do such a trifling thing better than I could Dovahkiin?! Come! Let us see whose Yol will win when you pit yourself against me!"

 

Alduin swiftly made his way over to what was roughly the center of the area, tail angrily thwacking her shins as he passed her. Ixis stifled a triumphant cackle. This may not have been the way she wanted to do it, but at least the job would get done now. She smirked at the impatient beast and began to walk over to him. She wondered what she had done to deserve such a moody dragon.

 

---

 

Once the cave was done, and by done it meant it fits Ixis' standards of comfort, Proudspire looked shoddily crafted in comparison. She had built a smithy, an enormous storage area, a kitchen, an enchanting area, a bath and personal quarters for them both. She had made what was once a nasty cave into their home away from home.

  

Ixis felt she was allowed some pride on this accomplishment, and she wondered if this was how the Dwemer had felt about their underground cities. If so, she felt particularly Dwemer-like. And she had to admire their good sense in using only rocks as building materials. The nonflammable properties of stone were damn near godly when Alduin invariably lost his temper.

 

Even Ixis' various Daedric artifacts eventually popped in, painfully landing on top of her in a great pile all at once, and Alduin left her buried under a mountain of priceless junk because he could not stop laughing. After that incident, she had devoted herself to getting to know the dragon.

 

The World Eater had never had an equal, a partner, or a friend before, and Ixis refused to be submissive to him, so Alduin saw her attempts as challenges or insults. If she were to be honest, she might have encouraged the contests because it was fun to win against such a sore loser, and she did get the better off some of their rivalries. For instance, he could hold Yol longer, but her Fus was much stronger than his. It appealed to her competitive side to fight against Alduin, and the challenges kept her on her toes.

 

But, Alduin... Ixis sighed. She had always accepted what Fate rendered irreversible better than most. She suspected the reason Alduin resisted her was because she did not resist him. They were opposite in every way, but Ixis wished the dragon would help her explore what had happened to them. Or at least not leave her alone. Theirs was supposed to be a two-way bond, and Alduin's adamant denial of her and the connection... Was affecting her.

 

The too silent pressure of the link was like being robbed of one of her senses, and she remembered Paarthurnax describing how the dragon in Dragonsreach earned its name from. The madness of being denied basic needs had settled in so completely that the dragon had been nameless when it died.

 

Her skin prickled as the intricate silver Seal of Akatosh that had manifested over her heart buzzed with energy. She knew somehow that Alduin had finally mastered his body and perfected his flight. Ixis looked at her pale grey hands as the energy throbbed with alien sorrow over her heart.

 

Why was she bonded to a dragon that had hated her even before she had been born? Perhaps she had not loathed Alduin personally, just sharply disliked his attempt to destroy her world, but that was no foundation for a link such as this. Ixis idly clenched a fist, wishing she had Auriel's Bow in her palm; the weapon was soothing to hold.

 

Perhaps I should go and gather information at that town at the base of the mountains. I may have robbed them blind of everything I needed, but stolen goods cannot speak. She mused to herself, careful to keep it out of the bond, even if Alduin could not hear her with the connection nearly asphyxiated.

 

It seemed like a good idea, so Ixis packed the Inventory as if she was going for a jaunt alone in Blackreach. She wondered if she should alert Alduin to what she was doing, but snorted at the thought of him caring about what she did or did not do.

He'll be fine. Probably won't even notice I was gone till I get back.

 

---

 

 

The plan went right for once, and no one was currently trying to kill her. So why was she sobbing like her world had just crumbled beneath her fingers? Oh, right.

 

It had.

 

---

 

 

Ixis carefully made her way down the mountain range and eventually came to a great waterfall. The village was close and she began to look for someone who would not be terribly missed for a few hours. However, even with her long experience as a markswoman and careful use of the Aura Whisper, she did not possess the sight needed.

 

So Ixis went down to village, skulking through the shadows and woods till she was able to select a spot for watching.

 

Time passed and so did people. They were of varying age, gender, and wealth but Ixis noted they all appeared to be of the same race. It seemed like the village was solely composed by Imperials and Nords. There was not even a hint of Mer, Beastfolk, or (oddly enough,) Redguards. Unusual, but not unknown in the eastern holds of Skyrim.

 

Her patience was soon rewarded, and as Ixis mentally sent thanks winging their way to her patron Aedra and Daedra, she leapt out and dragged a man into the shadows. With experienced ease, she covered his mouth and put him in the sleeper hold, adroitly avoiding his uncoordinated flailing.

 

Ixis only let go once she was sure he was unconscious. Grumbling a bit, she threw him over her shoulder like a sack of cabbages and walked from the shadows and into the deep forest. No one would hear him now.

 

 

Ixis continued to mutter darkly about how much of a pain it was to safely and humanely retrieve information without alerting anyone. It was so much easier to rob people in the dark of night, like she had done to properly furnish her den. Pulling out some leather strips, Ixis bound his hands and feet before pulling out a potion she had purposefully ruined.

 

The derelict potion reeked like few things she had smelled, but it would certainly be the worst thing this man would ever sniff. Ixis sloshed the liquid in its container and decided it would serve admirably as a substitute for smelling salts. Uncorking it, she held it under the man's nose. She did not have to wait for more than half a minute before the man woke with shouted curses. Silently and without care she recorked the bottle, ignoring the man completely as she returned the vial to Inventory.

 

Done with her final task, Ixis progressed onto the next step of her plan.

 

"Gol Hah Dov!"

 

With the full strength of the Thu'um the man had no choice but to become a slave to her will, but at least her Thu'um left her victim intelligent. Miraak's slaves had been decidedly short on aptitude, and though she could only control one being at a time, her slave was just as lasting and more alive. Assured that her safety and secrecy would remain intact, Ixis relaxed her crouch and sat down to cross her legs. She figured she would start with the basics.

 

"What is your name? What is the name of the village?"

 

"Byrd. Carvahall."

 

Well, she had never heard of this village and she had never come across it before landing here.

 

"Name of the mountain range?"

 

"The Spine."

 

"What is the current situation now that the Dragons have ceased to be led by Alduin?"

 

"Dragons are extinct, save for King Galbatorix's dragon. I know of no Alduin."

 

Ixis blinked, shocked.

 

"Where are we in Tamriel that you have not heard news of Alduin World-Eater's return in Skyrim?"

 

Byrd's politely blank face grew slack with confusion.

 

"What is Tamriel? What is Skyrim? We are in Alagaesia, and Carvahall is the farthest northern point of the Empire."

 

Horror was slowly creeping up on Ixis like the slow, slimy, terrifying feeling of Hermaeus Mora's tentacles encircling her to draw her into His endless library. It was a confirmation of something she had desperately prayed she had been completely wrong about.

 

"By Akatosh-"

 

"What is Akatosh?"

 

She was not in Skyrim. She was not in Tamriel.

 

Clumsily Ixis fumbled for a Septim, her emotions rendering normally smooth motions jerky, and she held up the gold coin like it was a talisman against Byrd's words.

 

"Here is a Septim, our currency, named for the Septim dynasty. On one side there is the bust of Tiber Septim, the man who ascended to become one of the Divines known as Talos. On this side it bears the words "The Empire is Law. The Law is Sacred."

 

Flipping the coin over, she presented the other side to Byrd.

 

"On this side is the Seal of Akatosh, with the words "Praise be, Akatosh and all the Divines."

 

Ixis's voice shifted from lecturing to authoritative.

 

"Do you recognize this coin or anything on this coin in any shape, form, or fashion?"

 

Dumbly, Byrd blinked in slow incomprehension.

 

"No, I do not, save for the Empire. But we've only ever had Galbatorix to rule us. He made the Empire and this is not our currency, crowns."

 

Ixis could feel her emotions roar and boil, the information hitting the release on her suppressed feelings, but she clamped down on herself. She was determined to be professional about this and get her information, so she set about learning as much as Byrd knew about currency, trade, politics, geography, history, theology, and about the other races.

 

He proved to be a good source on general information, but he was only minimally educated. Ixis would likely need to nab a noble or perhaps a merchant for better information. After Ixis finished questioning Byrd she gave him a small bag of gold, once she scuffed away the glaring markings.

 

Judging by his face, and her new knowledge of just how rare the metal was, it was a sinfully obscene amount in Alagaesian standards. She ordered him to attempt to acquire proper cooking ingredients and a map of Alagaesia with the money, buy what he could, and return here and bury it in a sack at the base of a marked tree. After he did his task he would forget everything that had occurred and would not return to the clearing, thus insuring Ixis' continued safety.

 

Byrd nodded, face regaining some animation with clear orders to follow, and left Ixis to be alone once more.

 

---

 

 

Without having an audience to play for, Ixis began to tremble. She had never thought such a thing was possible, and even if she had known, somewhere in the depths of her mind, this was never Skyrim... How could she had guessed the truth? Ixis began sobbing, deep, jagged cries, as the full force of her emotions made themselves known. All of the sentiments she had suppressed erupted, took up arms and went to war.

 

Hysterically she laughed through her crying, loud, high, and brittle. Instead of breaking down over the binding of their souls like Alduin, Ixis was breaking over a measly Septim. The madness of her reaction had her laughing insanely for a goodly amount of time. Wide red eyes leaked fat, bitter tears in wet streams as Ixis started to comprehend what this act of Fate had cost her.

 

She let out low wounded noises as her mind helpfully reminded her what it meant to be stuck here in Alagaesia with no way back. She would never again see her Guild call out greetings, her College cluck despairingly over her magical skills, her Companions play fight, her housecarls mourn her loot intake, her friends- She hiccupped in despair as the laughter left. The list went on and on and on.

 

She gasped frantically, trying to tread water in the ocean of her loss. Ixis wanted to scream and rage, curse the Nine and Sixteen, and offer anything so she could go back. But she could not get home even if she offered this entire world as her bargaining chip. She could not recreate the events that brought her here, and she could not hope the man was simply a woefully ignorant dolt.

 

He could have never heard of the Empire or Tiber Septim or Talos, but Akatosh? No. Her Father was represented in every pantheon that worshiped the divines, even the Dwemer had acknowledged his power. Tamriel could not be atheist even it wanted to; the Daedric Princes, at the very least, would never stand for the insult.

 

Ixis was in another world and stuck with only a cold, indifferent Alduin for her solace.

 

Overwhelmed with the all devouring nature of her grief, Ixis mournfully called for those she longed for, futile Thu'um echoing throughout the range in a haunting refrain. Rage like she had rarely known boiled within her at her immeasurable loss when she had done as commanded and fulfilled her doom. Ixis' shoulders bowed and her head fell to her chest.

 

Even as wretched as she was, Ixis refused to break under the weight of her emotions and give into the fell wrath her Dovah Sil yearned for. Twice was enough. Brynjolf and Ondolemar had both begged her to never willingly surrender again, not for their sake or anyone else's. They had feared thrice would be the number she could not overcome.

 

Frantic to regain control of herself, Ixis tried humming but she found it only served to distract her rage; Brynjolf had unwittingly taught her it. Her sorrow, grief, and loss were implacable in whatever defense she threw at them. Ixis found her ability to repress and compartmentalize her negative emotions useless in the face of what had been stolen from her; there was no silver lining she could see and cling to.

 

Ixis was swallowed and began to drown as she found herself trapped in an endless, downwards spiral. Time was lost to her and so were Alduin's mental calls, reduced to white noise. When she became aware again it was the darkest hour of night, alien stars filling the sky, and Alduin was curled around her body and mind.

 

A sense of worry came from the fallen dragon god, but he did not speak at all. Ixis realized the bond was now as open as it had been before Alduin learnt how to weld it shut. Her grief was bearable with two minds and hearts to carry it, and her loss no longer threatened to drown her when she was no longer the only one braving the storm.

 

Alduin curled tighter around her as if he was ashamed of imposing her total isolation. Numbly, she wondered if he did regret essentially abandoning her when she could not abandon him. He did not answer her, but Ixis couldn’t tell if the thought had traversed the bond.

 

All Alduin did was simply offer his strength and himself, to endure, and eventually overcome the turmoil in her soul. Gratefully and greedily, she took all he offered and felt the first spark of hope. Perhaps there was something to gain from all of this.

 

 

She was stuck in another world with only Alduin as her ally, and he with her. They did not like each other, yet they were bound together anyway. Perhaps she would find she had not lost everything just yet.

Notes:

The next chapter will shed some light, more or less, on why we suddenly witnessed a meltdown from our resident badass. Also, EMOTIONAL TRAUMA DRAMA!

Chapter 4: Reconcile

 

After her breakdown, things began to return to the status quo. With the bond no longer sealed Ixis felt her emotions beginning to stabilize again, her mind achieving an equilibrium it had done without since the deprivation had started. The sensation of regaining things she hadn’t even known were missing disturbed her greatly. It spoke of just how quickly and violently she had deteriorated.

 

While she knew that Alduin was tightly connected to her on a mental, emotional, and spiritual level now, she had had not the slightest idea of just how profoundly it affected her until now. Before being tossed into this world, Alagaesia, she would not have broken so completely as to become catatonic with grief. She would have grieved, mourned, and raged, but not to the frightening intensity and recklessness that she had. Ixis would have understood that if she could somehow be stranded here, then there was hope she could find a way back home. After all, a portal went two ways.

 

So, once she felt like she was coherent enough to think logically, Ixis had persuaded Alduin to discuss what had happened to her.

 

---

 

 

“Alduin, what happened last night should not have happened.”

 

“Joore, I had thought you would not wish to discuss the incident.”

 

Ixis resisted the urge to smack him on the snout with a gauntleted fist. She was not so weak that she couldn’t address major issues, no matter how personally embarrassing she found it. Last night might have shaken them both, but she was no frail Breton highborn lady that had never set slippered foot outside of her chateau.

 

Ixis was going to deal with this issue before it became a major problem. Even if Alduin would rather eat his own scales than talk about emotional breakdowns and his culpability in the matter.

 

“I’m not exactly eager to do this Alduin, but we’ve got to talk about this. Now, I know myself pretty well, and I generally can predict how I’ll react to a situation. Last night was not how I would have reacted before coming here, to Alagaesia.”

 

Interest drifted across from Alduin’s side of the bond.

 

“What exactly are you saying Dovahkiin? That the mere act of coming to this world has changed you so?”

 

Ixis nodded. “Yes and no. I haven’t changed, but with the bond, neither of us are completely the same beings that were expelled from Sovngarde. And now that the bond’s open again, I can feel just how quickly I was destabilizing without it.”

Pure alarm raced through Alduin and his wings snapped out from their resting place on his back. “Dovahkiin if you are-”

 

Ixis interrupted the fallen Aedra sharply. “Don’t be an idiot Alduin. I would never lie about something like this.”

 

Rage began to taint the alarm and fear Alduin was broadcasting, and Ixis began to brace herself for his inevitable explosion.

 

“Ton dur voknau daar grin! Dovahkiin, if what you suspect is true…” She didn’t need him to finish the thought, having come to the same conclusion herself.

 

Not only were they bound tightly together against their will, but the bond would turn on them and seek to maim them if they tried to deny their connection. It was looking more and more likely that this bond was of a deeper nature than they had originally thought, not just some strange quirk of this world.

 

“Here, let me try something Alduin. Can you-?”

 

Tentatively Ixis began calling her memories of the past three or so weeks and tried sending them down the bond. She focused on showing how her thoughts became increasingly maudlin, her emotions more volatile, and how her general state of being entered into a state of exponential decline. Now, firmly stabilized, Ixis could almost call what she had experienced a form of depression.

 

Judging by the conversations she had had with Colette and Florentius, many of the characteristic signs of depression matched her previous behavior.

 

A decreased appetite, with bouts of uncharacteristic fatigue. Difficulty in concentrating, remembering, and making decisions. Persistent physical symptoms that do not respond to potions, such as headaches, and chronic pain. Feelings of guilt, worthlessness, helplessness, hopelessness, and a loss of interest or pleasure in hobbies and activities that were once enjoyed.

 

Yes, Ixis felt it was safe to conclude she had demonstrated a textbook example of depression. Now she needed to ask Alduin what he thought about her behavior and how he had acted during all of this.

 

“Hmm… I see what you mean Dovahkiin. Up until I closed the bond, you were coping as well as could be expected of a joore. After the bond was closed you began feeling morose, experience a lack of initiative… And it just escalates up until last night.”

 

Irritation welled up from both of them. This was a unpleasant revelation for the both of them.

“Joore, do not misunderstand what is the truth. I am still superior to you-”

 

“Oh come on. Who’s the mortal that not only bested you in open, one-on-one combat, but also killed you where you should’ve been invincible?”

 

Alduin thrashed in anger, completely outraged at her returned audacity.

 

“SILENCE!”

 

She sniggered at him, too pleased with herself and her recovered ability to take joy in enraging the imperious dragon.

 

Alduin stamped the ground beneath him, before deciding on a method to get back at the Dunmer. Without warning her, Alduin sent across a similar burst of his memories from the bond’s closure to last night. Ixis’ laughter cut off in the middle of a particularly long gale and her eyes blanked before Alduin’s keen gaze. It took her about five minutes for Ixis to go through it all.

 

“Aedra damn flying lizard. A little warning would have been nice. So, yes, apparently you had a similar response from the bond’s closure, but it was tailored to you. Irrational irritation, uncharacteristic frustration, unreasonable fits of anger -though that’s nothing new- and… A marked decrease in sentient behavior and thought?!”

 

Alduin gave a curt nod, though it looked closer to a neck undulation.

 

“Yes. That is why I left the block on. My intelligence had declined enough by the time I should have noticed what was happening to the both of us it never occurred to me. Something about the bond caused both of our minds to deteriorate rapidly after the bond remained shut for a protracted period of time.”

 

Ixis nodded. “Yes. But my mental capacity didn’t suffer nearly as much as yours. And while your emotions were being influenced, it was not to the degree mine were. I wonder why we were affected differently.”

 

Alduin snorted out a great cloud of steam in irritation, something that had started occurring recently. “Your pondering does us little good, and it does not address the problem.”

 

Ixis rolled her eyes at him, earning a growl. “From our memories, I conclude that the bond only affected us mentally and emotionally. It did not touch our souls, despite the fact there is a level of the bond that binds our Dovah Sil together.”

 

She frowned unhappily. Alduin’s drooping wings suggested he felt the same way about the possibility that this bond could potentially attempt to damage their souls in the manner it had ravaged their minds and emotions.

 

“Either your breakdown was a sign of an escalation in the deterioration we were experiencing, or it was just a fortuitous break for us. Your sudden grief and despair were enough to spark as much concern I was able to muster in that state. By the time I got to where you were, you were catatonic, and I panicked mindlessly, like the dumb beast I was becoming.

 

In my frenzy I unwittingly dropped my block on the bond, and after the block came down… At least I pulled you out of the fire I accidentally called into being.”

 

Ixis goggled at him. “What.”

 

Alduin blinked at her. “I will say no more on the matter, since it is obvious your pathetic mortal mind cannot handle it. After I pulled you out of the fire, you woke a few hours later.”

 

Ixis was willing to let the dragon evade telling her the particulars of the incident; for now. She’d pry the details out of him when they weren’t discussing matters of import.

 

“So let’s recap what we know.

 

This bond was initiated after you hatched and when I first touched your new body. Your basic anatomy was altered upon your rebirth; new limbs and an interesting cove at the base of your neck where I could sit easily. We have no clue whether your physical alterations have anything to do with the bond, or if it stems from being reborn in a different world.

 

The bond has proven to be capable of reducing your innate intelligence and the ruination of my emotional equilibrium. It allows for instantaneous mental communication, including the sharing of our personal memories, and we have an empathic connection to boot. Our souls are also linked together by the same bond that allows for telepathic and empathic communication, but neither of us have seen any new developments in that aspect of the bond.

 

We have no idea why the bond started attacking us, but we can guess it was due to the bond being shut for too long. Apparently the bond can’t undergo long periods of dormancy on either of our sides’, and there’s serious, harmful side-effects if we try to keep it closed for too long. Luckily for us, the effects are either temporary or we didn’t pass the point where the side-effects become permanent.”

 

Alduin interrupted. “It also appears that we each shoulder the vast majority of one part of the less profound connections. I carry the telepathy while you, joore, carry the empathy; it explains why we had disparate experiences, while still maintaining a small portion of similarity.”

 

Ixis was surprised by Alduin’s theory, but it seemed sound to her.

 

“It does make sense. Maybe the bond was created that way to discourage anyone from attempting to break it, or reject it like we were? It’d be a pretty effective deterrent. Who’d want to become a dumb beast, like you said, or effectively go insane from their uncontrollable emotions?”

 

Ixis heaved a sigh. “This is looking a lot less like some sort of disastrous freak occurance Father allowed to humble us, and more in the vein of Father manipulating us to fulfill another prophecy.”

 

Alduin snarled at the word prophecy, and looked like he would have spat on the floor in distain if he were a mortal. “Prem Dovahkiin. If our Lord Father is readying us to act as His agents in another prophecy, the signs will show themselves.”

 

Ixis nodded, just as displeased as he was at the idea they might have another doom hanging over their heads; the first had been more than plenty.

 

Alduin spoke bitterly, “Until then, mu rodraan fah un Daan.”

 

---

 

 

After their conversation, things began to settle into a familiar pattern. Ixis would while the days away experimenting with the new local flora, smithing new improvements, attempting to perfect non-Restoration magic, and practicing with her weaponry. Alduin would work to adjust to his new body, alone, while attempting to improve it at the same time.

 

But Ixis had a plan to enable her to start working with Alduin again.

 

Alduin had finally managed to strengthen his forelimbs adequately, and when she heard this, Ixis set her plan into motion. She loudly asked Alduin, “So do you still remember how to fight on the ground?”

 

Her words worked like a fury spell, causing Alduin to engage her in combat; he completely ignored the fact that since she was back in her Daedric armor, completely kitted out, that she must have planned this encounter out.

 

They were on the floor of one of the numerous tiny valleys in the mountain range. Ixis had brought Alduin to this valley in particular since its geographical position had left it barren of anything except gravel and boulders. She had claimed that she was going to scout for ore veins close to the surface with her enchanted pickaxe, while inviting him to come and try to figure out why he was emitting sooty steam clouds on occasion in a manner he wouldn’t refuse. He really should have figured out she was something immediately, because she was outfitted for a major battle instead of a mining trip, but he had ignored her to his peril. Again.

 

Happily she ducked under a clumsy swipe from his left forepaw, feeling smug that her suspicions were panning out in her favor. Using his overextended limb against him, she lunged forwards and sunk her daggers into a thinly protected armpit. Alduin let out a roar of pain and Shouted “Yol Tul Shul!” into the space between his legs. But Ixis had abandoned the steel daggers (Alagaesia had some seriously pitiful choices for smithing materials,) knowing Alduin would Shout instead of trying to crush her beneath his weight.

 

Now out from under his belly, Ixis went after Alduin’s wings. He had, yet again, forgotten to keep them tight to his body and she was easily able to sink another pair of steel daggers into the middle leathery wing membranes. Panicked, Alduin jerked his wing away from her, causing her daggers to carve furrows through the membranes until they reached the edge of the wing. Alduin was effectively grounded now.

 

Ixis was shocked, gaping behind her helm as she eyed the now useless wing. Sure, that was what she would have done if she was being serious, but Alduin had done it for her! Now though, she needed to heal that wing quickly, before enough time passed to leave a scar on Restored skin.

Ixis telepathically shouted into the connection, knowing that Alduin couldn’t ignore the bond any more than she could.

 

Alright we’re done here! Now get over here Alduin, I need to heal that wing immediately.

 

Alduin’s rage surged through the bond as he drew himself up to his full height, now just a few feet short of his original size, and with no signs that his accelerated growth was stopping.

 

JOORE! You think I’ll let you get away with what you’ve done?!

 

Nonplussed, Ixis answered bluntly.

 

Well, yeah. I asked you if you could still fight on the ground, you attacked me, and I beat you. A downed Dovah is a dead Dovah after all. Which means that I won against you again, and that you don’t know how to fight on the ground with your new body.

 

You’re so inept with this new body, and scorning my help hasn’t helped you one bit. I could kill you so easily right now it’s ridiculous. Now, are you going to let me heal you or not?

 

Alduin snarled, sooty steam pouring out of his mouth.

 

“Don’t think I’ve forgotten your disastrous magic spells joore. I’d not let you near my wounds even if I was about to breathe my last.”

 

“Restoration is the only school of magic that I’ve never failed at when it comes to magic that doesn’t require an intermediary between mage, magic, and results. Also, I’ve been personally Blessed by Mara, which elevates me to a better healer than even the best mortal, non-Blessed healer that ever lived. As long as I’m not trying to regrow a limb or reverse aging, it’s well within my power to cure.”

 

Alduin glowered foully at her, leaking more of that weird sooty steam.

 

“If my wing scars after that little boast joore, I will use your bones as toothpicks.”

 

“I’d kill you first, but I’ll ignore your foul temper since you’re just a sore loser. Now c’mere, I want to start working on your wing first, then I’ll see to your armpit. After that, you’re going to start training with me again, because I don’t fancy finding out what the bond would do to me if you died.”

 

---

 

 

A/N: Well, here’s the next chapter. College is so cruel to the muse, I’d thought she’d keeled over a while ago, but she popped back up from wherever she’s hiding. There’s probably a good many of you who were kinda confused over Ixis’ and Alduin’s behavior last chapter, but this is the first inkling you’ll be getting about just what the hell the Alagaesian bonding is.

 

Of course, Ixis and Alduin are working from a severe dearth of information about Alagaesia’s Riders, so whatever they theorize may or may not be completely wrong, partially right, or the gospel truth. And no, nobody is going to know what the real truth of the bond is till I hit the latter middle of Eragon. That’s the earliest it might happen by the way. It could be a mystery until Oromis gets down to teaching. Or even later.

 

P.S. Annonimous4862 originally wanted Ixis/Dovahkiin to wind up with Murtagh, and though I was against it at the time… Well, I could try my hand at it, if that’s a popular idea.