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Shepard gets through her life by making lists. Lists keep order, unfolded facts in front of her. Facts are hard to deny, they were simple. Simple . She collects a datapad, typing in all caps: THE CASE OF LIEUTENANT COMMANDER SHEPARD VS THE AFOREMENTIONED’S LOVE FOR STAFF LIEUTENANT ALENKO.
Shepard makes a For and Against column, tapping a finger to her chin.
For: Alenko is very attractive. Against: Alenko happens to be spectacularly stubborn.
For: Alenko has certain...talents.
She pushes at the back of his skull, she was right there, she could see the brink. Her legs over his shoulder as they roll matching Kaidan’s thrusts into her with his tongue, using that hot, wet mouth of his to suck every other part. He's pushing her arcing hips down with his palm splayed out on her stomach, keeping her limbs pliant. Oh yes. She can feel the trembling build up, higher and higher and—
—then he stops and Shepard falls back onto the bed, heaving breaths falling freely out of an open mouth.
Shepard stares at the ceiling, blinking out the stars in her eyes and shuddering at cool breeze and the loss of Kaidan against her cunt. She props herself up on her elbows. Kaidan wears that damn smirk and he’s laughing at her with a dark gaze and desire in his eyes. It’s enough to make her shiver with anticipation.
“Are you going to get back to it or not?” Shepard’s annoyance rings clear as she growls between heaving breaths and Kaidan grins even wider.
“Don’t worry Shepard.” A corona skitters over his skin, lighting them both up. He lifts her leg and drags his lips along the underside of her thigh. “I’m going to light you on fire.” His mouth returns to her sex, pulling her clit between his lips and Shepard screams.
Against: Alenko is too duty bound to be corruptible
“Should we be doing this?” Kaidan says into the darkness.
Shepard groaned inwardly. Here we go.
“Shepard? Are you awake?” Kaidan rolls her over on her back so that she faced the ceiling. If his voice didn’t sound so earnest she would roll back over.
“No.” She says, turning her head to where she knows her is with eyes still closed.
“Should we be doing this?” He repeats.
Shepard opens her eyes. Kaidan is looking down at her, his back propped against her headboard and knees pulled into his chest. Sometimes Kaidan has these moment of guilt where he question everything. Shepard has learned how to navigate these moments and lead him back into her siren call. But, lately he was being particularly difficult. Stubborn is the word.
Shepard doesn’t know how to make herself enjoy happiness either, she merely process it differently.
“Kaidan.” Shepard runs a hand along his arm, curls long fingers around the side of his neck and he leans into her as she lovingly caresses the shell of his ear. Shepard rests her head on his knee. Kaidan is her study in control and self destruction. They were too happy. Something always happens to fuck everything up. People like them are never happy for long. All the reasons he has to constantly question himself. He never says any of this to her. He doesn’t have to, she knows it well enough.
“But sh—.”
Shepard growls and yanks the sheets back over her head.
For/Against: Alenko wears his heart on his sleeve. Makes him hard to predict. While also leaves vulnerable to attack.
"I love you Shepard. One day you're going to see that and I'm not going to stop trying until you do. I'll climb to the top of the Citadel tower and declare it if that's what it takes to convince you."
"I don't that's allowed." Shepard remarks with a smirk. There goes that fluttering in her chest again. He's right here saying he loves me, why can't I believe him?
Kaidan takes her hands in his, threading their fingers together. "I'm serious. All I know is I've only made two of these speeches in my entire life and both of them have been to you. That has to count for something right?"
Shepard is quiet, lives in the moment. Strings pulled tight in the empty spaces, drawing them together. For once she doesn’t pull back.
Kaidan lets out the breath he was holding, breaks the calm. “So there it is. That’s how I feel.”
“Really?” Shepard asks. She doesn’t mean for her voice to sound so desperate for him to say yes. For him to affirm over and over again, until she believes it.
“I mean every single word.”
Shepard smiles, pulls her lips together, biting down on them, fighting against the wetness cresting underneath her eyes. “You did good, Staff Lieutenant.”
Kaidan grabs her, pulling her body flush against him and kisses her. She throws her arms around his neck and falls into him.
For: She loves him.
The prosecution rests.
In the case of LIEUTENANT COMMANDER SHEPARD VS THE AFOREMENTIONED’S LOVE FOR STAFF LIEUTENANT ALENKO we the people rule in favor of Love.