Chapter Text
Albus Potter was sitting by the lake, leaning against the trunk of the big oak tree, studying. Well, he was trying to. But the sunlight was gleaming off Scorpius’ pale hair and it was quite blinding actually, now that the spring sky had finally come. The two best friends were sitting there in a comfortable silence catching up on their latest potions essay- only it wasn’t comfortable for Albus. At all.
You see, they had grown inevitably closer since their fourth year time travelling shenanigans, and Scorpius seemed to subconsciously like the comfort of touch ever since he had to live a reality without his best friend; so when they sat in the great hall, their arms would be pressed together even though they had plenty of space, and when they lay in the common room, Scorpius would press the sides of their feet against one another as if he were checking that Albus was still there. Little touches, innocent between friends (even if a little excessive). This was fine, right? Not really.
Because Albus felt his skin catch fire every time Scorpius pressed closer to him, his stomach flipping every single time he did so, and it burned. The blonde shone in the daylight like a star, and Albus was always too close, too hot next to the flames. It was eating him alive. Scorching. He craved his touch, his company; it was everything he wanted- but it was painful when he knew wanted more and could never have it.
The dark haired teen quickly shook his head as if to clear it, pft, as if that’s ever worked before, he thought bitterly, trying to concentrate back on his theory behind the draught of living death. The movement seemed to catch the other boy’s attention, and he languidly stretched his limbs out like a sleepy cat before sighing. Albus had to hold back a sigh of his own. He was too beautiful.
“I’ve got to go soon,” Scorpius’ eyes seemed to clear up a little after focusing so long on his parchment, “I’m meeting Rose at Hogsmede in half an hour!”
There it was. The punch to Albus’ gut.
“Yeah, yeah we know,” he replied, easily slipping on a teasing smile and rolling his eyes playfully even though all he wanted to do was scream. “We all know it’s your one year anniversary with Rose ‘the most amazing girl oh Merlin Albus can you believe she said yes’ Granger-Weasley.” He tried to make his laugh not sound hollow and judging by how Scorpius shoved his shoulder playfully he succeeded. “Hope you two have fun!” He beamed up at Scorpius as the other got to his feet and gave him a great big genuine smile in thanks that made Albus melt into the grass before he turned to leave. And how dare he leave him like that, a puddle in the aftermath of a supernova.
His eyes followed his friend’s movements as he walked away and he finally let the smirking expression slide off his face. He was used to this twisting feeling in his stomach; he now knew that he didn’t actually want to throw up (although these days, it felt more like his intestines were being pulled out slowly by a string attached to Scorpius’ feet, but maybe that’s just Albus being dramatic). Merlin, he had it bad. And it burned.
“You should tell him,” a familiar voice said from beside the tree.
“Argh!” Albus jerked in surprise and swung his head round to glare viciously at the smirking teen trying to look all suave and inconspicuous.
“You scared me,” he growled without any real heat.
James ignored him. “Watching you watch him is like watching Uncle Ron drool over Christmas dinner,” he said, before plopping down opposite his brother and kicking his legs in a bit so that his longer legs had room.
“I dunno what you’re talking about,” Albus said sulkily, trying to glare at him again but his blushing cheeks ruined the effect he was going for. Not that his glare would have bothered James anyway.
“Little bro, I can tell that you’re going to burst if you hold it in any longer.” Albus huffed. “And don’t deny it either. I know you.”
Albus looked down and stayed silent.
“You should tell him,” James repeated after a moment, nudging his brother’s shoe with his.
Albus looked at him angrily. “Oh yeah? What do you propose that I say?? ‘Oh hey Scorp it’s ya best friend. I know you’ve just got back from your lovely date with the girl you’ve been obsessed with for years, but I absolutely had to tell you that I’m in love with you. Hope this doesn’t ruin our friendship. Oh yeah, how was your anniversary??’” He spat out sarcastically. There was a strangled gasp behind him. And James watched as Albus completely froze in utter terror, eyes widening almost comically and gaze pleading as he frantically whispered, “Please tell me that’s not him.”
James’ apologetic look said everything he needed to know, and he squeezed his eyes shut as tight as he could.
“Uumm, I just. Came back for that,” Scorpius stuttered awkwardly, pointing limply at the wrapped box laying innocently beside James’ hand. Albus turned his head away and squeezed his eyelids even harder. “Albus, I-“
“Please don’t.” The dark haired teen cut him off.
“I-“
“Please just go on your date,” his attempted stern voice wavered at the end of his sentence and a single tear slipped down his cheek, still with his face turned away. Scorpius looked in panic to James, who gave him a small nod. The blonde took a deep breath in and James nodded at him again.
Albus only opened his eyes once he could no longer hear the footsteps crunching on the grass moving away and a sob shook his entire soul as he finally let go. His older brother’s arms wrapped tightly around him, sturdy and safe, until he ran out of tears.
☼☼☼
Al fell back onto his bed with a quivering sigh. James told him to go to his slytherin dorm and get some rest, but if he was being honest he would have rather gone up to the Gryffindor dorms, or even have just fallen asleep out by the lake. He didn’t want to be alone. He would never fall asleep alone in here, not when his bedsheets smelled like Scorpius and the slightly ripped edge of his curtains reminded him of the time Scorpius practised the banishing charm in their room and epically failed and the empty bed beside him looked wrong without Scorpius’ sleepy grin stuffed into the pillow. Albus sighed again. He wasn’t supposed to be thinking about Scorpius.
But what else could he do? Nothing was ever going to be the same now he knew. Albus knew Scorpius wouldn’t ever stop being friends with him because of this, and that he would try to keep things normal between them, but Albus knew it was always going to have an uncomfortable undertone now. Scorpius would squeeze beside him on the sofa like always before freezing and awkwardly shuffling away a bit to give them room, or he would avoid speaking to Rose as much around him to spare his feelings. Which Albus would appreciate actually, but it would not be natural. He’d lose his best friend.
He felt the wetness creep back into his eyes and held them back, thankful that his other two dorm-mates usually kept their distance from hanging out in here. Not that they would stay here on a Hogsmede weekend, anyway.
The door flung open, and he slowly turned his head towards it but the doorway was clear. No one there.
He shuffled up to a seating position and stared with furrowed brows at the empty space for a moment before the air swirled as floating fingers that appeared out of nowhere grabbed the nothing and pulled it off, leaving a breathless looking James clutching his invisibility cloak and a small beaming Lily close beside him. Albus’ mouth twitched upwards before he was attacked by two Potters and landed backwards in his mattress with an oomph.
“Can’t- breathe-“ he gasped out, but his protests landed on deaf ears.
When Lily finally crawled off him, she pulled out mounds of chocolate from her cloak pockets, and flung a bar each towards her brothers before ripping open a packet for herself and stuffing her face with it. Albus giggled and followed her actions, grabbing at the food and pushing at James to roll off him.
“You’re squashing me!! You’re heavy you know, Mr Star Quidditch Player.”
James dramatically gasped, his hand flying up to clutch his chest, “A fan!! Lils quick, get me some paper so I can give him an autograph!” Lily giggled and Albus rolled his eyes before giving his shoulder another shove, making James shriek loudly as he clutched on to the edge of the bed, dangerously close to falling off.
“I’m gonna fall I’m gonna fall, Albie heeellppp!”
Thud.
Lily’s giggling increased so that the bed was shaking with it.
Thud. She fell off the edge from laughing too hard.
☼☼☼
An hour later, a weary Scorpius held his breath as he pushed open the dormitory door. He was going to talk to Al. You can do this, he thought, and then immediately felt like a dickhead for being so nervous when Albus was probably heartbroken. He had no right to be nervous.
Still, he was shitting himself.
He opened his mouth to speak but cut himself off before any words could escape because in front of him was a sleeping Potter sandwich. Albus and a sibling either side of him, cuddled up close on his bed (which was far too small for three teenagers) amidst an abundance of sweets wrappers. The blonde could see that his best friend had puffy eyes, but looked peaceful in his sleep as the other two slept soundly beside him and it brought a small smile to his face.