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I’ve been a fool

Summary:

Heejin suddenly stops her dancing and lifts her brown tresses up to put in a ponytail. Hyunjin doesn’t avert her eyes away no matter how much she wanted to. She almost feels lured in at the sight of her pale neck.

P.s How to avoid your bestfriend when she’s constantly worried about you 24/7. It doesn’t help that your feelings are becoming overwhelming and you just want a taste of her neck.... literally.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

They have practice again. Hyunjin feels drained, she hasn’t eaten in ages ever since.... this whole thing happened.

 

She looks at the bread Heejin handed her a moment ago in secrecy. They weren’t supposed to eat as their managers were controlling their diet. But, Heejin has seen her pretty much moping around from the past few days. So, she took it upon herself to try and lift her mood up by giving Hyunjin her favourite food.

 

She feels warm at her bestfriends’ generosity. The girl was so perceptive and cared a little too much. Hyunjin doesn’t think she’s worth the trouble.

 

She takes a bite out of the bread, expecting the mouth-watering, pleasant taste of it. But, she frowns when the strange texture hits her instead. It doesn’t taste like anything she expected it to be. In fact, it tasted revolting.

 

She wants to cry.

 

How was she going to survive if she couldn’t even eat her favourite food in the world?

 

Hyunjin is not a person filled with regrets, she’s always thought that there was too much time in the world. She imagines travelling, exploring different cultures with her members and tasting exquisite foods when they would tour the world someday. But right now, she doesn’t even think she could last that long. If she couldn’t stand the taste of bread, how else could she eat other foods? She feels the anxiety bubbling up inside of her.

 

“Hyun, are you okay?” Heejin worriedly looks at her. Her voice filled with so much concern.

 

Oh my god, Heejin. How was she going to tell this to Heejin?

 

Hyunjin shakes her thoughts vehemently, she wouldn’t say this to anyone. She refuses for anyone to know that she wasn’t.... human anymore. They don’t deserve to carry this burden with her. The members already struggle enough with their own issues too.

 

However, Hyunjin frets at the fact that Heejin and her have always told each other everything. It’s gotten to the point where they both know if one of them is troubled without saying anything.

 

Hyunjin feels her heart clench at the thought of lying to her bestfriend. But, she had to pretend she was okay for her sake. For Loona’s sake too. This wasn’t the time to be selfish and shove something this complicated down their throats. They’re doing so well right now, achieving their first win and they’re increasingly filming more content day by day. She refuses to be the one to break it.

 

So, she musters up a bright smile for her bestfriend.

 

“Yeah, I’m okay Heejin. Thanks for the bread, I loved it.”

 

It seems that her fake smile worked when Heejin gives her a meek, shy smile.

 

“It’s okay, I just want you to feel better...“

 

Hyunjin fills the warmth pool in the pit of her stomach. At least, that was something that stayed even if she wasn’t human anymore. Her feelings for Heejin have always been.... questionable. In the midst of practice, filming, vlives and doing covers, she hasn’t had the time to think too much about it. But, she knows she would have lost her sanity a long time ago if Heejin hasn’t been there with her since day one.

 

God, she wants nothing more but to give the smaller girl a hug. But she couldn’t trust herself, especially right now. What if she accidentally crushed Heejin with some strength she didn’t know she possessed? Or worse, she suddenly loses control and does something stupid. She doesn’t think she could ever handle that.

 

So, she settles for patting Heejin’s head softly.

 

“I’ll be fine, you puppy. C’mon, let’s go practice.” Hyunjin reassures her.

 

—-

 

It gets worse. Hyunjin hasn’t eaten for days, and her sleeping schedule is ruined. She takes endless naps in the day, and gains her energy at night.

 

Jinsoul notices that something is up when she finds Hyunjin wide awake at 5am, when she heads to the toilet.

 

“Hyunjin? Why are you still awake at this time? We have practice in a few hours.” Jinsoul groggily says, as she yawns promptly after.

 

“Oh... I was just, um...” She struggles to think of something until she looks at Hyejoo’s console, left sitting untouched on the table in front of her. She finishes her response lamely, “... I was playing a game. I couldn’t stop.”

 

She hopes Jinsoul wouldn’t be too suspicious about her long pause. She lets out a thankful sigh in her head when Jinsoul responds. It appears she was too tired to care that much as she tells Hyunjin off-handedly about ‘needing to value her sleep more.’

 

Hyunjin awkwardly laughs and reassures her. It’s the only thing she could possibly do. Frankly, it’s all she can do lately.

 

She was only awake anyways because her body refuses to sleep. She notes that it happens lately nowadays. But, she’s grown fond of it as she finds comfort in the stillness of the night, where the tranquility overcomes everything else. Hyunjin doesn’t feel the need to put up a front for her members. It’s also one of the rare times, she’s left alone. She thinks it’s better that way, anyways.

 

Hyunjin is thankful that she has always been the more quite one in the group. Unlike Jiwoo or Choerry, with their bright cheerful personalities or the rest of yyxy being a little too loud and chaotic sometimes. She prefers to sit at the back and watch her members fondly instead. She knows that she’s more of an observer of the group.

 

Hyunjin also has noticed that the effects of her drowsiness doesn’t affect her at night. In fact, it hits when the morning comes and the light passes through the curtains and the sun begins their ascend. Only then, she wants nothing more but to sleep.

 

She feels herself dejectedly sighing, she’ll have to go to practice soon and somehow, find some place to nap for a while.

 

——

 

Practice gets harder and harder. She was so exhausted that she leans against the wall when they finish practising their fourth choreography. She thinks she’s going to pass out soon if she doesn’t take a nap as soon as possible. However, as she scans around she sees that it’s a suitable response when she looks over and spots half of them sitting down, out of breath.

 

She hears Yeojin yelling at something Sooyoung says as the older girl continues to tease her. Jungeun is loudly screeching at the back with Jinsoul and Yerim. Gowon and Hyejoo are leaning against each other, talking animatedly to each other. And, she spots Heejin practising a little bit more in front of the mirror.

 

She feels herself smiling, the girl has always been so persisting and exceptionally hard-working when it gets to their dances. She admires that a lot about the brunette.

 

Heejin suddenly stops her dancing and lifts her brown tresses up to put in a ponytail. Hyunjin doesn’t avert her eyes away no matter how much she wanted to. She almost feels lured in at the sight of her pale neck.

 

Has Heejin’s neck always looked that good?

 

In fact, it looked a little too inviting. She feels her gaze linger, taking every inch of it all. The skin looks so undeniably soft, it’d be so easy to just bite and have a taste-

 

Hyunjin feels the dread and uneasiness over her body. What the hell was she thinking? She was not going to maul her bestfriends neck, she needed to get a fucking grip. But, she was so hungry and she doesn’t understand why the thought of blood is so appetising to her.

 

She’s sure Heejin’s blood would taste exquisite.

 

Oh god, she was losing it. She decides she needed to take a nap or maybe a cold shower because her head is clearly not thinking right and she feels remarkably warm all of a sudden. She looks away from Heejin and sits down against the wall.

 

“Hyunjin, are you okay?” Vivi holds her gaze in curiosity.

 

Hyunjin forgets that she’s not the only observer of the group, her unnie is probably the biggest one. Vivi looks after them with so much care and love that Hyunjin wants to cry. However, she doesn’t think Vivi’s kind words would help her at all, or her comforting advice at this moment. In fact, no one could help her. She was helplessly stuck with this curse.

 

“I’m okay unnie, I’m just a little tired from practising non stop.” Hyunjin musters up a laugh and hope Vivi buys it.

 

Vivi sits down next to her, “You know you can always talk to me... about anything.” She looks over to where Heejin is, the girl focused on sharpening her footwork.

 

Oh.... so this is what it was about.

 

Hyunjin recalls the frequency of the moon vlive where Vivi exclaimed at how she thought her and Heejin were “together” at the start. The fact that her and Heejin were in the room listening to her saying that.... she couldn’t even look at Heejin for the remainder of the day after that happened. She blushes at the memories, that was so awkward. They don’t talk about it and they laughed like it was nothing. It’s what they always do, Hyunjin’s used to them sweeping things under the rug.

 

She knows her and Heejin were inseparable at the start, they did everything together and shared secrets underneath their covers. They knew each other inside and out. So when they got asked on who their soulmates were on Celuv tv, Hyunjin doesn’t even think twice about it. Without a doubt, she knows it’s Heejin.

 

It’s always going to be Heejin.

 

She believes that some people are just destined to be in your life and Heejin was that for her.

 

They even went as far as saying, “I love you” before going to bed. Hyunjin was 16 years old and she couldn’t fathom why she says it, but she does. She’s reminded that her parents told her it was ‘three words that explains the gratitude that you have for someone, so you should only say it to someone special.’ Heejin is special to her and Hyunjin has never found it easier to say.

 

It was as simple as the notion of the moon constantly pulling the ocean to create tides. Without the moon and it’s gravitational pull, no tides would exist. The tides would always be in need of the moon.

 

Hyunjin believes she’s the ocean and Heejin is the moon, constantly pulling her closer and closer but never reaching. It’s unfair that someone could have that much effect on her. She didn’t even ask for this happen.

 

Hyunjin doesn’t realise when it began, but one day she feels something warm in the pit of her stomach when Heejin smiles at her.

 

Heejin started losing her baby fats, her voice became deeper and she was simply growing up. For Hyunjin, it starts with small, meek glances, which ends up longer and longer as the days go by. Some days, Heejin would be cheerfully talking during their vlives and Hyunjin just found it hard to avert her eyes.

 

Heejin was so painfully beautiful. So, naturally it’s normal to stare a little longer than necessary. She wouldn’t miss the opportunity to relish in the art that was her bestfriends’ beauty, after all.

 

If Heejin noticed, she doesn’t say anything. Their hugs have more meaning in them for Hyunjin and every interaction they have makes her smile so hard, it was embarrassing.

 

Since when did the lines become so blurred?

 

Hyunjin didn’t know. The transition to seeing Heejin as her best friend and potentially something more happened so naturally. The moment she realises that there could be something more, it scared Hyunjin for as long as she could remember. But, even now she refuses to dwell on it.

 

Plus, she’s pretty sure Heejin is straight. The girl has loved dancing to boygroups ever since birth. Hyunjin finds it amusing that the girl was too perfect and so, God had to humble her with this flaw.

 

Vivi pulls her back to reality when she carries on speaking, in a careful manner. Not wanting to step any boundaries, that Hyunjin doesn’t want her to approach.

 

“You don’t have to say it Hyunjin but just know that I’m here for you...”

 

Hyunjin knows that Vivi knows. She’s grateful that she doesn’t push her to talk because she’s still unsure about her feelings herself. She doesn’t want to acknowledge it. How unlucky was she to end up falling for a fellow member who just ended up being your bestfriend? And on top of that, she was now... a vampire.

 

If she had a chance before that Heejin could possibly reciprocate her feelings, it was over, now. The universe hates her. Maybe, Hyunjin never stood a chance of having something with her after all. And this was the universe’s sickening way of telling her.

 

Hyunjin gives Vivi a grateful smile and they leave it at that.

 

——

 

Hyunjin doesn’t know how she slips up, but Heejin is constantly looking at her with worried glances. It starts when they had a potluck out of nowhere and usually, Hyunjin would be ravishing at the food gloriously laid out in front of her. But, Hyunjin leaves her food unattended. She leaves secretly after 15 minutes, when then rest of the members are too occupied with the food to go take a nap.

 

The second is when Jiwoo and Jungeun just finished their weekly food shop and gives Hyunjin her favourite bread. Hyunjin thanks them happily, but throws the bread out when she felt no one was looking.

 

(She misses Heejin’s curious and confused stare.)

 

The third is when the managers congratulated them by finishing the choreography they had for an upcoming comeback. They ordered all different types of meat.

 

When the food arrives, Hyunjin finds her herself genuinely intrigued by the steak that was a little too raw and Hyunjin finds that the redness of it was too salivating. She hears Jungeun laugh and jokingly say that ‘whoever didn’t wash their dishes could eat the bloody meat instead.’

 

Hyunjin ignores the comment and blissfully eats the meat in front of her. It looked too good, and Hyunjin finally had something to relish in.

 

“Yah, Kim Hyunjin!” Sooyoung yells in distaste, thinking at how Hyunjin could eat something that looked unpleasant so fast.

 

The rest of the members laugh, thinking that Hyunjin was just too hungry that she didn’t care about the type of meat she was eating. Even if it did look awfully raw and bloody.

 

Everyone indulges in on the food then and Hyunjin doesn’t eat anything else. Everything else appeared way too cooked and vibrant for her taste. Hyunjin thinks that this was probably going to be the norm for her. She would have to order raw, uncooked meat that looked a little bloody to be able to stand eating something.

 

She despises it. She has never been so jealous of everyone eating so gleefully.

 

She leaves in secrecy after 5 minutes, hopefully to take a nap.

 

Or, so she thought. The moment she walks out of the door. Heejin grabs her arm. She hears the door close behind her. Maybe, that was the breaking point for her. Because, she notices that Heejin looks a little mad.

 

“Hyunjin, what’s going on? And, don’t tell me you’re okay because, you’re clearly not.”

 

Heejin may look peeved off but she hears the clear concern in her voice.

 

She could lie to her again, she could do this. Hyunjin repeats, like a mantra to herself.

 

“What are you talking about? I’m fine Heejin. I’m just a little too tired so I’m going to take a nap.”

 

“You’re not okay! You haven’t been eating at all. You slip out of bed at night, hoping no one would notice but I do. And, you take so many naps in the day which is unusual.”

 

Hyunjin is surprised at Heejin’s attentiveness towards her. She’s missed all of Heejin’s worries glances. Maybe, she’s been too preoccupied with trying to be the ‘normal Kim Hyunjin’ which clearly hasn’t worked anyways.

 

“Look, it’s nothing. I’m just so exhausted lately.” Hyunjin replies dejectedly, hoping Heejin would drop it already. But, the girl is relentless.

 

“I am too! We all are. But this isn’t just exhaustion. I know because you can hardly finish your favourite bread and you even threw it out!”

 

Hyunjin starts to find herself increasingly getting annoyed. She just wants to take a nap and Heejin wouldn’t stop her interrogation, she can’t do this right now.

 

But, before Hyunjin could deflect her accusations, Heejin continues her heated rant.

 

“And, what was that about over there? You hate your meat raw for as long as I could remember. You can’t stand the taste of it.”

 

Hyunjin decides that she’s had enough of this. She’s going to take a nap and leave whether Heejin liked it or not.

 

“What do you want me to say Heejin? I told you, I’m just exhausted okay? Stop being on my back. I’m leaving.”

 

Before Hyunjin could turn around, Heejin steps in to her personal space and Hyunjin flinches. She feels Heejin’s warmth contrasts against her cold frame. And most importantly, she hears the sound of Heejin’s blood coursing through her veins. It was so sickeningly loud. She curses her heightened senses because she starts to smell Heejin’s blood too. God, it smelt so delicious, it was beginning to cloud her thoughts.

 

If she thought the meat from before was salivating, this was on a different level. She feels her hunger more prominent than ever.

 

Heejin’s neck is so close and her control is slowly slipping out of her hands. It’d be so easy just to sink her teeth straight through her skin and have the smaller girl underneath her tremble at her actio-

 

Hyunjin forcefully shakes the thoughts out of her head. Heejin needs to get away. Right now. Before, she loses herself completely.

 

“Hyunjin see? You’re even flinching because I’m near you. What did I do wrong? Please, let me in.” She hears the desperation in Heejin’s voice but it’s not enough for Hyunjin.

 

No, she refuses to drag Heejin into all of this.

 

Hyunjin clenches her fist and gives Heejin a pleading look, they know that they understand each other through gestures and stares. And, she urgently needs Heejin to step away from her. She doesn’t know how long she could hold her control for.

 

It’s not enough, since Heejin gets even closer and she feels her hand cup her right cheek.

 

“Hyun, please.” She pleadingly whispers that Hyunjin feels herself tremble underneath her touch.

 

Hyunjin loses control then.

 

With a speed so dangerously swift, she pushes Heejin against the wall and she stares hard at her. The wall was so far from them, she couldn’t have done that so briskly if she was human. Hyunjin vexes herself for being so careless.

 

It’s over.

 

Heejin definitely knows what she is right now.

 

But, somehow she couldn’t couldn’t find it in herself to care too much at this moment. She disregards the fact that anyone could walk in on them but her main focus was on the girl in front of her. Everything else was just a distraction, she only needed Heejin. Her scent, her blood, her warmth was torturing her mind and she just needs a little taste. That’s all.

 

Hyunjin holds Heejin’s waist with one hand while her other hand is on the wall, clenched. She’s so close to Heejin that she’s never felt more alive as she could. Hyunjin nuzzles her face into the crook of her bestfriend’s neck and takes in her glorious scent. Her lips barely grazing her skin, she hears Heejin whimper and her pulse quicken underneath.

 

She places a soft kiss and she oddly feels Heejin move her neck ever so slightly so she could gain access. Hyunjin feels her canines grow out and she decides to teasingly lick her neck before she bites on it. She hears Heejin let out a low moan at the action.

 

Her moan breaks the spell Hyunjin was under, gone was her hunger but fear resides all over her body. She then realises what the hell she was about to do to her bestfriend.

 

She moves her face away from Heejin’s neck, debating on whether to look at her in the eye or just run and escape all of this. When she decides to just give Heejin the most apologetic stare she could muster, she expects Heejin looking up at her in disgust. What she finds instead is completely unexpected.

 

Heejin was clearly flustered and out of breath, a bright red blush adorning her cheeks. God, Hyunjin suddenly feels herself aching to kiss her instead. But she vehemently shakes that thought out of her mind. What the hell is wrong with her?

 

She felt disgusted for almost mauling Heejin in the corridor when the girl was only concerned about her health being. Hyunjin feels her sanity slipping. It doesn’t help that Heejin looks a little aroused and Hyunjin wanted nothing more but to finish what she was about to do and maybe, something more.

 

God, she needed to get away from this. She could have hurt Heejin and she’s thinking about the things she could have done instead?

 

She was sickening.

 

Hyunjin struggles to find the right words to say, too embarrassed at her actions. She clenches her fists harder against the wall. She wouldn’t be able to ever forgive herself if she hurt Heejin. So, she lets go of Heejin’s waist and mutters a soft broken reply, only loud enough for Heejin to hear.

 

“I’m sorry, Heejin.”

 

And, just like that Hyunjin leaves and her bestfriend finally doesn’t stop her.

 

She thinks, that out of everyone in the world she really didn’t deserve Heejin.

 

—-

 

For the following days, Hyunjin doesn’t go near Heejin at all. She avoids Heejin like a plague and even if they had schedule or vlives, she made sure to stand as far away from her as possible.

 

They haven’t talked ever since the incident happened but she’s hoping Heejin hasn’t said anything about her situation to their members. She knows in her heart that Heejin isn’t the type to be like that but she still wants to keep her guard up, just in case. After all, Heejin probably hated her now.

 

She wants to keep Heejin at a close length but not too close that she’ll hurt her. She’s scared of what this means for Hyunjin, her feelings for Heejin has grown significantly stronger along with her vampirism. She doesn’t think that they could ever go back to the way that they used to.

 

She couldn’t even look at Heejin in the eyes anymore. She was so embarrassed and ashamed.

 

She feels disgusted at herself.

 

When Hyunjin is told that they’re heading to some sort of unknown location. She keeps an eye out, hoping that she’s not placed in the same van as Heejin or anywhere near her.

 

When they get told to stand in front of some coloured square paper stuck to the floor of their practice room, Hyunjin has an inkling that this leads to the teams that they’ll be.

 

So, when she glances at Heejin’s paper being the same as hers. She instantly moves.

 

Her thoughts are confirmed when their manager says that the similar papers were for their teams. Hyunjin lets out a grateful sigh that she moved places. That was a close one.

 

(She misses Heejin’s slight frown when she moved in the last second.)

 

—-

 

When their managers ask them who they wanted to be roommates with, Hyunjin has never been more conflicted. She has always chosen Heejin for this. She can’t imagine choosing anyone else other than Heejin.

 

So, what if this was her last selfish request?

 

She chooses Heejin. She knows that the girl wouldn’t choose her, anyways.

 

However, her assumptions were incredibly proven wrong when their manager tells her that she’ll be rooming with Heejin. Hyunjin is shocked and confused. No way, did Heejin choose her.

 

“Am I rooming with Heejin because I said I wanted to room with her?” She questions their manager, curiously.

 

“No. She wanted to room with you too.”

 

Hyunjin finds herself at a loss of words. Heejin still chose her, even after what happened? She feels a surge amount of happiness rise within her body. She still chose her, after all this time.

 

She can’t fathom why Heejin still decides to stick with her, even when she doesn’t believe that she’s worth it. All the trouble she’s caused her and Heejin still thinks highly of her.

 

Jeon Heejin was something else, it makes Hyunjin smile. Just the thought of the brown-haired girl makes her so undeniably happy. She feels stupid. Maybe, this is what they mean by ‘only fools fall in love.’ She recalls that Yerim told her that quote as a fun fact and now, she was experiencing it.

 

Hyunjin is helplessly falling harder and it’s all on Heejin.

 

She hopes that she’ll catch her at the end of it all.

 

——

 

Hyunjin enters the room and she notices Heejin already there, sitting on their bed.

 

Oh god, there was only bed.

 

Well whatever, Hyunjin wouldn’t sleep tonight anyways. So, that’s sorted itself out. She moves forward into the room and struggles to make eye contact with the brown-haired girl. She can’t even leave since they were told to go their own rooms.

 

“Hyunjin, please look at me.”

 

Heejin breaks the silence for them. Hyunjin looks over to where Heejin is sitting at and starts to feel nervous under her scrutinising gaze.

 

Heejin then looks down on her hand, twiddling her thumbs and continues to softly speak, “You know, you haven’t stared at me in a while.”

 

What?

 

Has Heejin always been aware on her stares lingering a little too long on her?

 

She feels a little light-headed. Hyunjin doesn’t have time to mull over it when Heejin carries on speaking.

 

“I don’t question why you always stared. Maybe, if I acknowledged it... you would stop. It always made me feel at ease knowing that you were always looking at me.”

 

Heejin continues with a heavy sigh, “You always comforted me when I was down, when my insecurities are overwhelming and when my doubts scare me. You were always there, Hyunjin.”

 

Hyunjin doesn’t understand why Heejin is telling her all of this. But, she feels her chest getting lighter and lighter as Heejin confesses her feelings. They hardly talk about their feelings for one another so Hyunjin knew that this would be a moment that she will always cherish.

 

“You know, you give so much of yourself to other people. But, you hardly take care of yourself. You don’t give yourself enough credit than you deserve and it makes me sad....”

 

“You’re my bestfriend, Hyun. So, please let me be there for you. Whatever is going on with you, I want to know all of it.” Heejin finishes with the softest look she’s given her.

 

Hyunjin breaks down and she finally spills everything. The way she was turned into a vampire because she had trouble sleeping when they were in Jeju. So, she decided to take a stroll by the beach. She was only supposed to be a quick meal for the vampire, but they accidentally drank too much that they had no choice but to turn her. She was innocent, after all.

 

She looks over to where Heejin is and sees her almost tearing up. Hyunjin instantly moves and sits down next to her. She wipes Heejin’s tears with her thumbs and worriedly asks her,

 

“Wait, what’s wrong? Please, don’t cry...”

 

“You could have died, Hyunjin! If she didn’t turn you, you would have been dead. Just the thought of it makes me feel.... sick. I don’t know what I’d do.”

 

Heejin cries harder and Hyunjin takes her in her arms and soothes her, “Hey, hey stop. I’m here aren’t I? I’m alive, Heejin. I’m not going anywhere, okay? Please don’t cry, you’re going to make me cry too.”

 

She feels Heejin softly laughing in the midst of her crying. They both know that when one is emotional, the other feels the emotional pull as well. Hyunjin thinks it’s crazy, how much her and Heejin value each other, to the point that they’re the most empathetic and compassionate together regarding their feelings. The intense sincerity that they hold for each other makes Hyunjin’s heart clench a little tighter.

 

She loves Heejin so much, it’s overwhelming. But, Hyunjin has never been happier to state that Heejin is someone whom she’s so proud to love. The girl deserves every kind of purest love out there.

 

They stay like that for a couple of minutes until Heejin’s tears were dry and she looks over at Hyunjin.

 

“Hyunjin... when was the last time you ate?”

 

Hyunjin recalls, she’s been ordering late night meals that consisted of extremely raw meat that were a little bloodied. It was how she kept her hunger minimum. Although, it has been getting harder recently.

 

God, why did Heejin have to remind her... she suddenly feels the closeness between them and the memory of the previous incident passes through her mind. She just fixed things with Heejin, she refuses to fuck up again.

 

She swiftly stands up and moves to the window, further away from Heejin.

 

“Um... yeah. I’ve been ordering raw meat that’s hopefully bloody and I’ve found that it’s the only thing I can stand to eat right now.”

 

Heejin looks at her worriedly, clearly not happy at Hyunjin’s response, “Don’t you need to drink blood?” She questions.

 

“.... I know. But, the thought of drinking a stranger’s blood terrifies me. What if I kill them because I can’t stop drinking? I don’t think I can cope with that.”

 

Hyunjin thinks, that if not drinking blood eventually kills her, then so be it. She’d rather have her own blood on her hands than having someone else’s. She doesn’t want to kill anyone.

 

“What if it was me?” Heejin suggests.

 

“What? What are you talking about?” Hyunjin frowns, she feels the dread slowly creeping up her body. She couldn’t possibly be suggesting what she thinks she means.

 

“What if you didn’t have to drink someone else’s blood? You can just drink mine.” Heejin states with so much firmness, as if it makes things acceptable.

 

“I can’t tell if you’re joking or not-“

 

“Hyunjin, I’m not! I’m serious. You need actual blood! I’m not stupid. How do you expect to survive as a vampire without ever drinking blood?”

 

“Heejin, I literally just told you that I’m afraid of killing the person I’ll drink blood from. And, you’re suggesting this? This is crazy. No, I refuse to accept this.”

 

Hyunjin starts walking up and down their room, scoffing at Heejin’s ridiculous idea. She was definitely not going to have Heejin’s blood on her if she loses control. Just the thought of taking too much and hurting Heejin makes her sick to her stomach.

 

Heejin stands up and walks to her.

 

“Hyunjin... please. I trust you. This is why I want you to do this with me. I don’t want you to die, you need to drink blood.”

 

Heejin starts getting closer to her personal space once more and she’s reminded of their similar scenario before. Heejin continues to speak her mind while holding Hyunjin’s hand.

 

“I trust you more than anyone else in the world, Hyun. If you’re not going to do this for yourself... then please, do this for me.” Heejin begs.

 

Hyunjin hears the desperation in her voice, she feels Heejin’s blood sickeningly loud, pumping so beautifully. It’s within her reach and Heejin is willingly giving her free access. If Heejin wanted this, she would gladly accept.

 

She would do anything for Heejin. And, she would ensure that she would control herself.

 

“.... okay, I’ll do it.” Hyunjin hesitantly replies.

 

Heejin’s whole face immediately lights up, and she gives Hyunjin a smile so wide that it makes Hyunjin feel so oddly proud at herself.

 

“Okay! Well, come here.” Heejin states and happily turns around, dragging Hyunjin behind her.

 

She sits down in the middle of the bed and Hyunjin follows. She sits in front of her. Hyunjin suddenly feels her palms starting to get unbelievably sweaty, and she feels her face warming up. They haven’t even done anything and she’s a nervous wreck.

 

She reminds herself that she needs to get a grip because she was about to take a bite out of her bestfriends’ neck. One wrong move and she could hurt her or worse, potentially kill-

 

No, she shakes the thoughts vehemently out of her mind. She would make sure she would do this right.

 

She sees Heejin taking her neon green hoodie off and moving her luscious, wavy brown hair behind her shoulders. She moves her t-shirt down a little lower so that Hyunjin had easier access to her neck.

 

She gulps at the sight. Heejin was so stunning, it hurts.

 

“So, um... you should probably move closer, Hyun. How do you expect to bite my neck if you’re that far?” Heejin awkwardly lifts the mood up.

 

Since when did the room get so tense? They usually hold comfortable silence together when no one speaks. But this time, the palpable tension in the air is clear.

 

Hyunjin moves closer and closer but for Heejin, it didn’t seem enough.

 

“Um, I think you’re going to have to sit on my lap.” Heejin says embarrassedly, the blush on her face so prominently red.

 

Hyunjin feels her face warming up. If not drinking blood kills her, she also thinks Heejin being this adorable and forward would.

 

She’s only a breath away from Heejin when she sits on her lap, she hears Heejin’s blood deafeningly louder. Her warmth and her scent is making Hyunjin glaze over at the girl underneath her. She’s never realised how painfully hungry she is until she stares at Heejin’s skin looking so ravishingly beautiful. She couldn’t wait for the taste.

 

She feels like she’s dreaming, her mind is becoming so hazy, she doesn’t realise she mumbles a soft, “You’re so beautiful, Heejin.” before she let her lips graze her neck.

 

Hyunjin presses her lips down and then lay kisses around the spot she chose on Heejin’s neck. Heejin shuddered as she ran her tongue quickly along the flesh, Hyunjin squeezed her eyes shut and inhaled. "I'm sorry, I don't want to hurt you."

 

"You won't Hyunjin. I know you won't. I trust you, it’s okay.” Heejin murmurs back.

 

With Heejin’s approval, she gives her canines a quick lick and sunk the sharp teeth into the flesh.

 

God, It tasted so good. It tasted anything better than Hyunjin’s ever encountered in her life, and that included bread. Heejin’s blood was thick, and wet in her mouth- salty yet sweet, it was just the perfect combination. She drinks and drinks, hearing Heejin whimper underneath her, the girl tightening her hold on her shirt.

 

Hyunjin feels the strength regaining her body once more and she feels so powerful. When instinct told her to stop drinking already, she follows it. If Heejin trusted her to not lose control then she will not. She quickly pulls her fangs out and started to suck on the newly formed wounds instead, licking them gently to prevent the sores from closing.

 

The reaction she got was unexpected. Instead of a whimper of pain, there was a very soft and breathy release of air…almost like a moan. When Hyunjin turned her eyes up she was met with the sight of Heejin’s eyes squeezing closed tightly, a blush spread like a wildfire across her pale face.

 

"You taste amazing, Heejin," Hyunjin moaned, hugging the brown-haired girl closer to her body. Heejin whimpered in response, leaving Hyunjin wanting her to shudder again. And again.

 

She licked and sucked at her bestfriend's neck ravenously, enjoying the squeaks and labored breaths escaping from Heejin's throat all too much. It did not help that the Heejin bucked her hip upwards suddenly and Hyunjin feels herself increasingly aroused at the contact.

 

She wanted to stop but she doesn’t have the heart to, especially when Heejin was pushing herself onto her more and more. She grounds herself up against Heejin, desperate for more contact and they both let out a moan.

 

Hyunjin finally stops mauling on her neck and looks straight at Heejin instead. She’s never seen the girl underneath her so flustered, her cheeks adorning a bright crimson colour. Hyunjin wants nothing more but to lean over and take those plumped lips to herself already.

 

She was so close, she feels her eyelid start to droop when she slowly leans in. Heejin’s not stopping her, she feels herself about to close the gap.

 

But, Hyunjin stopped when she hears Hyejoo knocking on their door and yelling for her.

 

“Hyunjin! It’s your turn to be recorded, come on.”

 

Hyunjin yells a response to say that she was coming in a bit. She looks over at her bestfriend and kisses her cheek, gently.

 

“Thank you for trusting me, Heejin.” Hyunjin murmurs, not wanting to break the spell that they were both still entranced in.

 

Heejin gives her a bashful smile before responding, “I knew I could trust you, Hyun. I hope you’re feeling much better now or stronger...”

 

Hyunjin ruffles her hair affectionately before getting off Heejin. She gives her bestfriend a cheeky smile before retorting, “I’ve never felt more good in my life.”

 

Hyunjin walks to the door and turns around before leaving, “Get some rest, okay? You must be exhausted after um... all that.”

 

They both blush at what just transpired a moment ago. Hyunjin feels stronger than ever and she’s grinning so dopily that when she finally walks out the door. Hyejoo bluntly says,

 

“What happened? Why is your face all red? and you look like you just won the lottery.”

 

Hyunjin laughs and pats Hyejoo’s back, telling her she’s just happy to be roommates with her bestfriend. Hyejoo gives her an amused smile but agrees with the statement. They walk on and Hyunjin’s smile doesn’t disappear from her face for the remainder of the day.

 

Her feelings for Heejin have intensified even stronger but somehow, she doesn’t feel so helpless anymore. Maybe, she does have a chance after all when she recalls Heejin leaning in too in their almost kiss. And, all the noise she was making. The thought of it makes Hyunjin a little light headed knowing it was because of her.

 

When the opportunity arises, she would kiss Heejin for definite.

 

Hyunjin refuses to let Jeon Heejin be a regret in her life.

 

——

 

As Hyunjin walked away from their room, Heejin blushes when her fingers strokes over where Hyunjin had bitten. The wound holes are still there, and the feeling of her bestfriend sucking and breathing on her neck was still fresh in her memories.

 

"You taste amazing, Heejin."

 

Heejin feels her cheeks instantly redden even more as she lets herself fall back on the bed.

 

‘Kim Hyunjin, what are you doing to me?’

Notes:

..... and scene. lmao I wrote this at 5am when I’m supposed to be writing for ‘Don’t walk away’ but I’ve always wanted to write a non au 2jin fic and a vampire fic so I was like what if I do both 😳

Anyways, hope you enjoyed it <3 Let me know your thoughts!