Chapter Text
At this rate he was going to miss his flight.
Karkat was standing in one of the many terminals of the O’Hare International Airport in the wee hours of the morning. His flight was departing within a half-hour. He made sure to get there with plenty of time to spare so he could go through the grueling slog of the American airport security system, and now all that was left was to wait near his gate for his flight to board. But it was pretty hard to keep an eye on the clock, or an ear out for any announcements from a flight attendant, when Karkat was very, very preoccupied by his very, very distracting fiancé, who’s been glued to him like a baby koala ever since Karkat let him know about this trip.
Karkat had graduated several months ago. Jade had a reading week from school this week, so Karkat decided to make the rather impromptu decision to fly to California from Chicago to visit while she had a break from her studies. When it came time to tell Dave the news, Karkat was convinced Dave would forbid it. But, surprisingly, Dave had just gone quiet for a moment or two before saying, ”Wow! Sounds great, babe. Jade is gonna be fucking stoked.”
Then Dave promptly proceeded to exude a nervous energy that Karkat could practically see coming off of him in thick waves. Every time Karkat opened his mouth to say something about it, he clamped it back shut. Of course Dave would be nervous about him going to California. Dave wasn’t going to relax until the minute he saw Karkat again next week. Karkat had considered cancelling his trip altogether, making up some excuse. Something came up. He couldn’t get the time off work; didn’t want to jeopardize his new job. A family emergency? But every time, he just felt guilty about letting Jade down. He really missed Jade, and he’d hate to disappoint her by not coming after all. So, perhaps despite his better judgement, he was going through with it.
And now Dave was squeezing him so tightly Karkat could hardly breathe. This was also because Dave was cutting off his air supply by kissing him relentlessly, uncaring of the other travellers walking through the terminal. Karkat finally manages to get a moment of reprieve from the onslaught of kisses, pressing his palms against Dave’s chest and pulling away slightly.
“ Daaave ,” Karkat wanted to groan in exasperation but it wound up coming out as more of a sigh of defeat.
Was it too late to cancel his flight? He’ll just tell Jade he mixed up the time on his ticket and missed the plane...he could always go see her for winter break, after all...
No, no, no, no, dammit. Vantas, for fuck sake, grow a pair—
“Dave, babe, come on, I gotta get going,” Karkat sighs gently, squeezing Dave’s shoulders.
He doesn’t sound convincing at all, even to himself. This was going to be the longest that he and Dave had spent apart since they reunited back in October. Ever since that fateful day, they had made sure to be together as much as possible. They took turns staying at one another’s dorms until Karkat graduated and got an apartment downtown. It wasn’t exactly close to the Illinois Tech campus but Dave still stayed over often. Karkat’s place provided lots of privacy.
When they couldn’t be together in person, due to class or work, they would constantly be messaging one another on Pesterchum, calling each other on the phone or going on FaceTime.
Was it a little excessive? Sollux certainly thought so.
But he could fuck right off. You spend five years ripped away from the love of your life, run into them by pure chance in a crowded café at seven in the morning on a dreary fall day in Chicago, spend the rest of that day reconnecting and learning about each other’s shadowy years spent apart, and not be disgustingly affectionate, grossly domestic and clingy thereafter.
Karkat rubs his thumb along Dave’s cheek and offers him what he hopes is a reassuring smile. “I’ll be back before you know it. This time next week, we’ll be...well, we’ll be sleeping, because it’s early-as-fuck-oh-clock right now and no human being in their right mind should be up this early, but still.”
Karkat leans up and kisses Dave on the tip of his nose. “I’ll be back soon, Dave.”
Dave is--
Ha, okay, no way around it.
Dave is nervous .
Here's his darling, lovely, wonderful, incredible fiancé ready to fly off to the place that was basically hell on Earth for Dave for two years. Can anyone blame him, really? He's standing in the airport about to let Karkat go (and yeah, it's not in that way but the words still make his heart lurch), trying to steal as many last moment kisses before letting his boyfriend board an airplane and fly off.
There's a distinctly jittery beat in his blood. What if the airplane crashes and Dave never sees Karkat again? What if Karkat gets out to California and is in a car crash? What if somehow Jade's gone insane and kidnaps Karkat and never lets him leave? What if Karkat--
Dave is massively overreacting, but okay, maybe he's become a little co-dependant on Karkat, and maybe the idea of him being literally unreachable for an extended period of time (it's a week, it's a week , Dave will be fine, Karkat will be fine, it's just a week-- ) is making him nervous as hell, and maybe Dave is trying really hard not to ask Karkat to change his mind and not go, they're standing right here in the airport and Dave is still locking the words don't go behind his teeth.
He doesn't want Karkat anywhere near the place, he doesn't. He knows if he leaves it alone, then it will all go okay, but the envelope in his pocket is weighing him down like a fucking anchor.
He should leave it alone. He should leave it alone. If he does nothing, then Karkat won't ever find anyone from that era and nothing will happen and it will all be okay .
But.
But--
Fuck, he should just leave it alone. But- he doesn't know her address. He knows her partner's address, but knowing that guy, he would just fucking toss any letter out.
Karkat's grumbling in his arms, but it's indulgent, soft. He's trying to get Dave to let him go so that he can leave. Dave doesn't want to, he really doesn't want to, but he needs to--but he doesn't want to, he doesn't want Karkat in a place where he can't reach him again.
It's fine. It's fine, Karkat has to come back. He has to go back to his job. All of his stuff is scattered between his apartment and Dave’s dorm. Dave has his phone number, his Pesterchum handle, all of his social media--he won't lose Karkat again.
Fuck. Okay. Okay. Deep breath. Karkat's kissing his nose and telling him it's alright.
"I know," Dave says. "I know--I'm just being dumb." He clears his throat. "I mean," he says in a my-therapist-told-me-to-do-this tone of voice before Karkat can reprimand him, "I am having an emotional response to an issue that is causing me distress and it is a completely normal and healthy thing to be experiencing."
He shakes his head a little bit, locks the words don't go behind his teeth, and steals another quick kiss.
"Okay, I'll let you, um, get on your plane." Dave says, and doesn't let go. His heart is pounding in his ears. "Can you--can you do a favor for me while you're in Cali?" He shoves a hand in his pocket and pulls the envelope out, pushing it into Karkat's hands. "I would just send it through the mail like a normal ass person, but I don't know her address otherwise I'd just send it but--I know her dick of a boyfriend's address and he'd just toss it because like I said, he's a dick. And even though he probably doesn't remember me, I bet he'd toss it anyway, so this is the best way--wow, that's a lot of words to say can you please go to this address, find Feferi and give this to her?"
The letter is thick with way too many sheets of paper of a letter that Dave had wrote and rewrote and then edited down until it's still way too fucking much. It's sealed with Feferi's name and her dick of a boyfriend's address written on it. If Karkat feels the letter, he'll be able to feel something hard and flat inside.
“Not dumb ,” Karkat says, pushing Dave on the forehead, “If I didn’t like it, I wouldn’t—“ and then Karkat’s eyes go wide and he blinks owlishly as Dave suddenly cuts him off and shifts into his “I learned this in therapy” voice.
Karkat’s mouth screws up into a crooked line as he tries to hold back his mirth, but a snort still bursts out. But god, he’s proud of him. He’s so fucking proud of the process Dave has been making.
Karkat’s mirth softens quickly and he tousles the front of Dave’s bangs, affectionate, preposterously fond.
“Yeah, D. It is. It’s fine. Trust me, you kissing me desperately in the middle of an airport is absolutely in the top rankings of my sappy romantic fantasies. You know how to get my motor running.”
He waggles his eyebrows at Dave, hoping some humour will help alleviate Dave’s fried nerves. “Are you gonna start into that Nic Cage monologue from the end of The Family Man ? Because if you are, you gotta give a guy some warning because I’ll totally—“
Dave doesn’t quote Nic Cage rom-com lines are him, he just steals a quick kiss instead. It shuts Karkat right up anyway. Karkat hums softly, smiling through the kiss, and is still looking up at Dave with a goofy, besotted smirk when Dave pulls away. He says he’ll let Karkat get on the plane but he doesn’t let Karkat go. Karkat doesn’t either.
Then Dave is...asking him for a favour. And the goofy smile slips from Karkat’s face and into a look of confused surprise as Dave is suddenly pushing an envelope ( wow, it’s thick, and there’s something inside it? ) into his hands. Karkat stares up at Dave unblinking as Dave talks a mile a minute, and Karkat can’t keep up with the onslaught of panicked word-vomit, but he nods along quickly as Dave throws what are probably very important instructions into all the other babble.
“Feferi. Got it.” Karkat says, looking down at the package for a moment before looking back up at Dave. He’s suddenly aware that his heart is hammering roughly.
Now there’s a million questions knocking around in his brain. Why didn’t Dave mention this sooner, instead of minutes b efore Karkat has to get on a plane and fly to California for a week ??? God fucking dammit Dave.
He wants to ask what’s in the envelope but he feels like...it isn’t his place to ask. The curiosity is killing him, but he keeps his mouth shut. Maybe he could open it on the plane ride, and then reseal it before giving it to Feferi? What the fuck, no , that was so fucked up, NO—
“Who...is Feferi?” Karkat asks quietly.
Karkat's trying to make him feel better and Dave appreciates it because it does kind of work, a little bit, more than zero--so it's something.
But god, Dave is so stupid. He's had so much fucking time to ask Karkat to do this, and now he's finally done it at the last fucking minute when of course he'll have questions. Dave shoves his hands into his pockets so that he doesn't pull Karkat into another hug and rocks a bit on his heels.
"Um," he says, then chews on his lip. "She's--" He's trying really hard not to blurt out something embarrassing in the middle of the airport. "Basically the only fucking decent person in that entire place and I owe her a lot." he mumbles.
That's really, really underselling it. Feferi's basically the only fucking reason he got out of that place. Even if her boyfriend is a massive fucking dick and Dave doesn't understand why she's with him. Basically, if he ever had anyone who acted like a mom, it was Feferi. Which is weird as shit because she's literally been wrist deep in his ass. Okay, maybe not that weird--for the record, Dave does not have a mommy kink....
...
...probably?
Okay, not thinking about this right now.
Anyway--Feferi. Yeah, she's basically the only fucking reason he got out of Damara's fucking den of villainy.
"Um. If you need to, you can namedrop me." Dave says, feeling his cheeks go hot. "Either of them. Feferi's nice so she won't like...do anything, but feel free to kick her boyfriend in the dick if he flirts with you."
He really, really, really hopes that he isn't sending Karkat to Damara's clutches by doing this. Dave is like 100% sure that Feferi won't drag Karkat into something that would introduce them, but her boyfriend--yeah, that's much more plausible.
Karkat keeps nodding, he feels like he’s probably nodding too much now but his brain is kind of broken and he can’t think of anything else to do.
“O-Okay,” he says finally, dumbly.
He’s relieved to hear that at least one person from Dave’s time in California was good to him. And if that’s the case, he’s looking forward to meeting her.
Karkat pulls Dave in for another kiss. Suddenly, he hears the flight attendant calling out his gate number, announcing they are about to start loading the plane. Karkat’s heartrate kicks back up again. Oh, god, this is it. He’s really leaving. He’s not going to see Dave for a week. Karkat refuses to fucking cry. He won’t do it, he won’t, he won’t. He doesn’t want the last thing Dave sees to be his ugly, puffy crying face. So Karkat pulls away and smiles at Dave as brightly as he can manage even though his chest is starting to ache.
“I love you, D.” Karkat says, pulling Dave down to bump their foreheads together, “I’ll let you know when I get there. I love you. I’ll call every day. Okay, gotta go. I love you. Bye.”
He says all of this while pulling himself out of Dave’s arms and gathering up his belongings.
“Bye,” he says, and this time his voice comes out like someone is choking him. He lurches forward and kisses Dave again. He doesn’t want his last word to Dave to be bye —
“ I love you ,” he whispers as he pulls away, “Be right back.”
And then he hurries off towards the gate before he loses the last of his nerve, down to a frayed strand, ready to break.
Karkat kisses him again and then there's the flight announcement and Karkat really has to leave now, there are no take-backsies.
Dave's heart lurches uncomfortably. Don't go, don't go, don't go --
"I love you too." Dave says softly as Karkat presses their foreheads together. "Have a good flight."
Dave takes a really deep breath and holds it as Karkat collects his stuff. DON'T GO, DON'T GO--
Karkat kisses him one last time and Dave wants to cry, but he breathes, "See you soon, baby."
Then, Karkat's hurrying off. Dave's heart is vibrating at a pitch and frequency that he's surprised that all the glass around him isn't shattering into bits.
" Don't go ." He whispers, knowing that Karkat can't hear him.
Fuck. Fuck , he doesn't want this to be a sad fucking goodbye. He can't let it be this way, he needs to do something --
Holy shit. Okay. A grin breaks across his face. Who gives a shit that they're in an airport?
Dave cups his hands around his mouth and shouts, “WE HAVE A HOUSE IN JERSEY! WE HAVE TWO KIDS, ANNIE AND JOSH. ANNIE’S NOT MUCH OF A VIOLIN PLAYER BUT SHE TRIES REAL HARD. SHE’S A LITTLE—”
Karkat makes it to his gate and gets into the boarding lineup for his flight, all without managing to look back. He still doesn’t let himself, knowing if he looks over his shoulder and sees Dave just...standing there, all alone in the middle of the airport terminal, he won’t be able to go through with it.
Karkat closes his eyes and takes a deep breath.
Don’t look back. Don’t look back —
“WE HAVE A HOUSE IN JERSEY!”
Karkat’s eyes snap open, and he whirls around. No fucking way—
Dave is standing exactly where Karkat left him, halfway across the huge terminal, his hands cupped to his mouth, yelling at the top of his lungs.
“THE HOUSE IS A MESS BUT IT’S OURS. AFTER 122 MORE PAYMENTS, IT’S GOING TO BE OURS—”
Karkat just stands there, dumbfounded. He’s so beside himself with astonishment he can’t even find the wherewithal to be embarrassed that every single person in the airport is now staring at Dave, wondering who in the hell he’s yelling at. After shock, the second thing Karkat feels is...impressed? How in the fuck did Dave memorize an entire Nic Cage quote? He’s definitely spending way too much time with John.
Then there’s too many emotions after that, and Karkat can’t keep track of them all. He starts to laugh, he can feel himself choking up. A couple people in line are looking between him and Dave and starting to put two and two together. Karkat slips his backpack off his shoulder and lets go of the handle of his suitcase.
“—AND WE’RE IN LOVE. AFTER 13 YEARS OF MARRIAGE WE’RE STILL UNBELIEVABLY IN LOVE. YOU WON’T EVEN LET ME TOUCH YOU UNTIL I’VE SAID IT—”
Karkat gets out of the line and starts sprinting across the terminal.
“—NOTHING HAS EVER FELT MORE REAL. AND IF YOU GET ON THAT PLANE RIGHT NOW—”
Karkat crashes into Dave, throwing his arms around his neck and sending them both to the floor, and Karkat’s laughing and crying and kissing everywhere he can reach.
Dave starts shouting and Karkat turns around and the disbelieving expression on his face almost makes Dave burst into laughter, almost makes him screw up the bit, but he holds firm with just the tiniest bit of a wobble.
He can feel everyone staring at him, can feel every person going who's this dumbfuck ? But he can't bring himself to care because Karkat's laughing helplessly, and setting his bag down and Dave's committed so even as Karkat starts sprinting across the airport towards him, a fond, overwhelmed, loving expression on his face, Dave doesn't stop until they're crashing together down to the floor and Karkat is kissing his face over and over and both of them are laughing and crying and it's so much better than standing there watching Karkat walk away with his backpack shouldered. It's worth every bit of public embarrassment because he gets one more moment, one more hug.
"Love you--" Dave gasps, and for the first time since Karkat announced the trip, his heart doesn't hurt, he doesn't feel like he's about to vibrate out of his skin from nerves. "Love you, Karkat--" He presses a kiss to his mouth, grinning, cheeks wet.
"You should really go get on that plane, now." Dave says after a moment. "I know it's my fault that you're not in that line now, I know, I'm so handsome and impressive that you had t o come back and kiss me again.”
Karkat laughs wetly. “I can’t believe you know that whole quote word for word, holy shit. Wait until John hears about this, he’s going to run across a room and kiss you senseless, too.” he grabs both sides of Dave’s face and kisses him, long and deep.
Karkat gets to his feet and grabs Dave’s hands, pulling him up off the floor. Then Karkat wraps his arms around Dave’s shoulders and pulls him in for a tight, bone-crushing squeeze of a hug, pressing a kiss to his cheek before breaking away, already starting to back up but not willing to turn around yet. But this time there’s a big grin on his face.
“Okay, for real this time. No more slinging around your surprising amount of knowledge for rom-com quotes, or I will not get on that plane.” Karkat spares a glance over his shoulder, and sees the line at the gate getting shorter. People are sort of just...side-stepping around his abandoned luggage.
He looks back at Dave. “See you next week, baby. Love you.”
And then Karkat turns around and high-tails it back to the gate, gathering up his luggage, slinging his backpack back onto one shoulder as he passes by the bemused-looking flight attendant, muttering a quick apology under his breath that he’s not sure she hears or even cares about, and then he rounds a corner and is walking down a small hallway with a large window on one side where he can see his plane waiting outside on the tarmac.
He’s really going. He’s really about to get on a plane and fly away from Dave.
Even if he looked back now, Dave’s well out of sight. The next few moments are a dazed whirl as his thoughts race and he shuffles slowly to his seat, and puts away his luggage. He sits down, and everything slowly starts to truly settle in.
Karkat thinks about Dave’s laugh as he kissed him over and over, and misses him already.
Karkat watches The Family Man on his laptop once the plane has taken off, and wishes he was back in his apartment watching it with Dave curled up next to him.
The movie kills two hours of the four hour plane ride, so Karkat throws on another movie at random and before he knows it, the plane is preparing to land. Once he gets his larger luggage from the turnstile, Karkat grabs some lunch from the food court, and sits down at a free table to figure out LAX’s wifi so he can shoot Dave a message.
carcinoGeneticist [CG] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 09:43AM
CG: HEY, BABE.
CG: LANDED IN LAX.
CG: I’LL HAVE YOU KNOW I TOTALLY WATCHED THE FAMILY MAN DURING THE FLIGHT OVER, LIKE THE BESOTTED LOVESICK SAP THAT I AM.
CG: THEN I WATCHED THE WEDDING SINGER AND GUESS WHO TOTALLY FORGOT AIRPLANES AND AIRPORTS ARE JUST A UNIVERSAL FUCKING CONSTANT TO THE ROMANTIC COMEDY GENRE?
CG: BECAUSE I TOTALLY FORGOT ABOUT THE SCENE AT THE END WHERE ADAM SANDLER SERENADES DREW BARRYMORE ON AN AIRPLANE.
CG: THEN I COULDN’T STOP LOOKING UP TO CHECK AND SEE IF YOU’D COME WALKING DOWN THE AISLE WITH AN ACOUSTIC GUITAR.
CG: AND TO MY IMMENSE DISAPPOINTMENT, YOU DID NOT.
CG: I GUESS WHAT I’M TRYING TO SAY IN A REALLY CONVOLUTED WAY
CG: IS THAT I MISS YOU ALREADY.
Karkat sighs, setting down his phone and pulling out the envelope Dave gave him from his bag. He looks up the address on Google while he finishes his lunch. Turns out it’s about an hour drive from the airport, and in the complete opposite direction of Jade’s student dorm. Looks like he’d have to make a detour before going to see Jade. He’s about to pull up her Pesterchum handle when his phone buzzes, telling him he’s got a new message, which happens to be from Jade. He huffs a little out of his nose. She always did seem to have a sixth sense about when Karkat was about to message her.
carcinoGeneticist [CG] began pestering gardenGnostic [GG] at 09:47AM
GG: hi karkat! <3
GG: have you gotten to the airport yet??
CG: HEY.
CG: YEAH, I JUST LANDED A FEW MINUTES AGO. JUST GETTING SOME FOOD, HAD TO SKIP BREAKFAST TO MAKE MY FLIGHT SO I’M FUCKING STARVING.
GG: hehehe
CG: THERE’S SOMETHING I NEED TO TAKE CARE OF BEFORE I HEAD OVER TO YOUR PLACE BUT I’LL HEAD STRAIGHT OVER ONCE IT’S DONE.
GG: okay that is totally fine!
GG: does it have something to do with dave?
CG: YEAH.
CG: THERE’S SOMEONE HE WANTS ME TO GIVE THIS LETTER TO.
GG: ooh a letter??
GG: that is so
GG: mysterious
GG: not to mention old fashioned!
CG: WELL IT FEELS LIKE THERE’S SOMETHING INSIDE THE ENVELOPE OTHER THAN JUST A LETTER. IT’S PRETTY THICK BUT THEN THERE’S THIS HARD, FLAT THING INSIDE, TOO.
CG: I DIDN’T ASK DAVE WHAT IT WAS.
GG: are you going to stay to watch them open it to see what it is?
GG: something hard and flat hmmm
GG: i wonder what it could be!
CG: UGH. I DON’T KNOW. THAT JUST SEEMS LIKE IT WOULD BE WAY TOO FUCKING AWKWARD.
CG: BUT THEN AGAIN, THE ONLY ADDRESS DAVE HAD TO GIVE ME WAS THE BOYFRIEND’S, AND APPARENTLY HE’S A BIG ENOUGH ASSHOLE HE MIGHT JUST THROW THE FUCKING THING AWAY BEFORE SHE GETS TO SEE IT.
CG: SO I HAVE TO AT LEAST MAKE SURE IT GETS INTO HER HANDS.
CG: AS FOR STAYING TO WATCH HER OPEN IT
CG: I DON’T KNOW.
CG: IT JUST DOESN’T SIT RIGHT WITH ME. LIKE IT’S NOT MY PLACE, YOU KNOW?
CG: I’LL JUST MAKE SURE SHE GETS THE LETTER AND THEN GET THE FUCK OUT OF THERE BEFORE SHE OPENS THAT PANDORA’S BOX OF DAVE-SECRETS I STILL DON’T KNOW ABOUT.
GG: hmm.... :/
GG: i think you should see what it is!
GG: if dave didn’t want you to see what was inside he wouldn’t have trusted you with it!
GG: i bet you even thought about opening it up to see what it is and then sealing it up before delivering it, riiiight??
CG: FUCK NO!
GG: :P !!!!
GG: you totally did!!
GG: but you didn’t do it, of course! because you respect his privacy, and because
GG: you looooooove hiiiiiim!! <3 <3
CG: YES. MY RELATIONSHIP WITH DAVE IS BUILT UPON A STRONG FOUNDATION OF MUTUAL TRUST AND RESPECT.
CG: WHEREIN WE DON’T ROOT THROUGH EACH OTHER’S SHIT LIKE A BUNCH OF MANGY RACCOONS, TRYING TO GET A WHIFF OF OUR SIGNIFICANT OTHER’S DIRTY LAUNDRY.
GG: awwww :)
GG: ANYWAY. IT’S GOING TO TAKE ME AWHILE TO GET TO THIS PLACE, SO I BETTER GET GOING.
GG: okay!
GG: good luck!! <3
gardenGnostic [GG] ceased pestering carcinoGeneticist [CG] at 09:55AM
Karkat closes Pesterchum, throws away the garbage from his meal, gathers up his belongings and makes his way to the front entrance of the airport, bringing up the Uber app on his phone as he goes and inputting the address from the envelope.
Los Angeles had the worst fucking traffic Karkat has ever witnessed, and the ride takes an extra half-hour longer than he had anticipated. Karkat double checks the address several times before he finally decides he is certain he’s found the right place. He tucks the envelope into the back pocket of his jeans, takes a breath, and knocks on the door.
The address that Karkat finds himself at is clearly in an upper class, well-to-do kind of neighborhood. The houses aren't gated, but they exude energy of “ if you're poor, you shouldn't even be looking at me ”. Multiple stories, wide, perfectly trimmed lawns, tasteful yard decorations that must cost hundreds of dollars each .
When Karkat knocks on the door, there's a minute of silence. It's almost long enough to maybe indicate that someone isn't home, but eventually the door swings open and a man leans in the doorframe.
He's tall as shit and puts it to good use, looking down his nose at Karkat. He's got the vague expression of someone looking at someone who's clearly in a lower socio-economic class and not trying very hard to hide their disgust about it. He's pretty, though, high cheekbones and a jawline built for stubbornness. He'd be a lot prettier if he didn't look like he was currently smelling dogshit.
But he leans in the doorway and folds his arms, looking Karkat up and down, dressed in clothes that look like they probably cost more individually than Karkat makes in a month.
"Can I... hel p you?" He drawls. He pops his p , arching his brows, perfectly manicured fingers drumming on his arm, painted a dark maroon color. Skinny jeans and tight shirt with a scarf on top and pushed-back hair with a single, wavy purple streak in it--this guy oozes metrosexual.
Karkat stands at the door feeling like a gross, slimy mackerel out of water. He drops his backpack off his shoulder and shoves all his luggage off to the side as he waits for someone to come to the door. He’s standing there like an idiot for long enough that he’s starting to think nobody is home. Or maybe they’re looking at Karkat on their state-of-the-art security camera and about to push some button that will have Karkat trying to outrun some hounds nipping at his heels in about two seconds.
Karkat shuffles uncomfortably from one foot to the other, tearing his gaze from the dark purple door and over to the garden, perfectly kept. Jade and her green thumb would be salivating at the mouth admiring how well maintained it was, rich soil and vibrant, verdant plants. There’s a large seahorse statue sitting amongst the shrubbery and it’s cut from gleaming white marble. It probably costs more than Karkat’s rent for his glorified soapbox of a bachelor apartment in downtown Illinois.
Then, the door opens, and Karkat’s head swivels back sharply.
Where in the fuck has Dave Strider brought him.
“Uh...” Karkat says.
Wow. Great fucking first impression, Vantas. Now you reek of poverty and stupidity.
“I’m...looking for, uh...Feferi.” Karkat mumbles.
Jesus, this guy is looking him up and down, and it feels like his eyes are peeling Karkat’s skin off like a carrot with every pass. It takes every bit of strength Karkat has not to avert his gaze. He feels like he’s too fucking poor to even be making eye contact with this uppity motherfucker.
PleasefortheloveofGODjustslamthedoorinmyfaceandlethisbeover—
The guy gives Karkat another long up-and-down look, the sneer on his mouth becoming more pronounced.
"Wwhos askin'?" He drawls. It's very clear that he would love nothing more than to shut the door and be done with this whole mess and only social norms dictate that he must stay here and see the interaction through.
Karkat does his very best not to pull his mouth into a frown. A muscle in his jaw twitches with the effort.
“I have something for her,” Karkat says tightly.
Jesus, were fucking manners just non-existent to the people of Los Angeles, or what?
Karkat knows he doesn’t fucking belong here. He’s the lowest rung on the ladder, and this guy can probably smell the dirt in his blood.
He’s got a wish list on Amazon with a bunch of cheap engagement rings because he can’t afford to get Dave something he deserves.
He knows Dave would be happy with Karkat putting a BBQ Ringolo on his finger, but still.
Thinking about Dave makes Karkat remember the fact Dave told him he could mention him by name. He didn’t think he’d have to do it so soon.
“It’s something from Dave,” Karkat says, “Dave Strider. He asked me to bring it to her.”
For a moment, the guy's brow furrows, like the name doesn't quite ring a bell, but then something clicks in his brain and there's a flash of- surprise, maybe, or maybe relief?- and then he's rolling his eyes and stepping back into the house.
"Oh, Strider . Get in here and don't touch anythin’ ."
He shuts the door once Karkat's inside and strides off into the house.
The inside of the house is just as immaculate and wealthy-looking as the outside. Light blue walls with gold trim, artful furniture with gleaming handles and artistic pieces clearly there to be shown off, not enjoyed, are scattered about the entrance.
It's a handful of minutes before he's returning, a woman by his side. In direct contrast to the man, she's short and chubby and has a smile on her face as she steps forwards to greet Karkat.
"Hi!" She says brightly. "Eridan told me you were looking for me--Dave sent you?"
Karkat quickly gathers up his bags and steps inside the house.
Holy fuck, it’s like a fucking castle in here.
Karkat is told not to touch anything, and he certainly doesn’t need to be told twice. The dude walks off and Karkat stays rooted in place in the foyer, crossing his arms tightly across his chest. But then that feels extremely stand-offish and rude, so he shuffles and puts his hands in his pockets. But then, that makes him feel like an absolute douche, so he takes his hands out of his pockets and just opts to keep his arms firmly glued to his sides.
Then the guy is coming back, and this time there’s someone with him. Karkat blinks, feeling his shoulders going slack at the sight of her. She’s a lot shorter than he had pictured her. She’s wearing round, fuchsia glasses, has lots of long, curly black hair, and a bright smile on her face that makes her eyes twinkle. She looks like something out of a Disney movie. Maybe Karkat really is in a castle.
He can still feel himself blinking stupidly as she walks up and greets him cheerfully.
“Uh—yeah, hi—hello—“ Karkat clears his throat, “He did. Sorry, my name is Karkat. Karkat Vantas—“
There's an ear-ringing shriek of delight from Feferi and then her arms are around Karakt, hugging him directly into her very generous bosom.
"Oh, he found you oh my gosh I cannot believe this, this is incredible !" Feferi squeals in delight, hugging Karkat tightly before pulling back and putting both of her hands on his shoulders, beaming at him. "Aw, and you're just as cute as he described, where are my manners, come in!" She grabs Karkat's hand and tugs him into the house, down the hall. Eridan looks rather irritated about the whole thing, but stays quiet.
Feferi continues her chattering as she tugs him down the hall and into a sitting room, somehow ushering Karkat down onto a couch without it seeming rude.
"I've heard so much about you, it's incredible to finally meet you, I don't know if Dave's told you anything about me but it's so wonderful, please, you have to tell me everything, how did the reunion go? How's Dave doing? Is he still at Illinois Tech?"
She sits on the other side of the couch, hands folded in her lap, and she's practically vibrating with excitement. Eridan, however, slouches in the doorway, arms folded. His expression is vaguely bored, but there's an interest in the way he watches Karkat.
There’s a sudden high-pitched squeal that comes out of Feferi that Karkat is convinced could be used to echo-locate with a dolphin, and then Feferi flings her arms around Karkat and Karkat lets out a muffled whooof as she squeezes the life out of him.
Everything is happening all at once and suddenly Karkat is being pulled further into the house, his luggage abandoned by the front door. All he can do is stumble uselessly behind Feferi as she leads them down a hall and then he’s being ushered into a chair that’s probably worth more than half his video game collection. He sinks into the plush cushions, and awkwardly tries to reposition himself to sit on the edge of the chair so he’s touching the fabric as little as possible.
Feferi plops down across from him, absolutely beaming. Over her shoulder Karkat can see the guy isn’t joining them, he’s just leaning there in the doorway, leaning against the door frame with an disinterested expression on his face. He hasn’t taken his eyes off of Karkat. Karkat pulls his gaze away and looks back at Feferi, trying to compartmentalize everything she’s been saying.
She’s heard about Karkat? All Karkat did was tell her his name and she knocked the wind out of him with a hug.
Dave told Feferi about him? Karkat didn’t think Dave would have told anyone here about him at all.
Karkat realizes he’s just been sitting and staring at Feferi stupidly, so he clears his throat—probably way too loudly—and then scratches at his cheek.
“It’s, um...it’s nice to meet you, too.” Karkat says.
Other than the obvious monetary imbalance, Karkat also feels like he’s sitting before someone who knows all kinds of things about him when he doesn’t know a thing about Feferi other than her name, and that she was kind to Dave.
Dave trusted her. So Karkat has no inclination not to trust her, too.
Feferi is telling Karkat to tell her everything. God, where to even start?
“We actually ran into each other completely by accident,” Karkat explains, “In a café one morning before class. Turned out we were both going to Illinois Tech, by some crazy coincidence. I graduated a couple of months ago, but Dave’s still got a bit before he’s done. He’s doing really well, though, he’s got a paid internship that’s going to turn into a full-time gig once he graduates...”
Karkat shuffles in his seat, grabbing at his knees. “Sorry. He actually hasn’t mentioned anything about you, before today. But he says he...he owed you a lot. He actually sent me here to give you something.”
Karkat reaches behind him and pulls the thick envelope out of his back pocket, leaning forward to hand it to Feferi.
“Uh, here. This is for you.” Karkat mumbles, plopping back into his seat once Feferi takes the envelope. “You don’t—uh, you can open that later.”
He has so many questions.
He looks over Feferi’s head. The pompous dude is still in the doorway, drumming his painted nails slowly on his arm and giving Karkat a half-lidded expression.
Karkat really shouldn’t intrude any more than he already has.
“Uh, look, it was really nice to meet you. I’ll let Dave know you said hi. I better go, I’ve got a friend waiting for me. Sorry to intrude, I should get out of your lair—hair, out of your hair.” Karkat goes to push himself up out of the thick cushions and onto his feet.
Feferi listens with a delighted expression as Karkat explains how he and Dave reunited, nodding in understanding.
"I'm not surprised." She muses, as she accepts the letter from him, immediately starting to rip the letter open despite Karkat's words. "I don't think there'd be any real reason for him to talk about me."
As Karkat starts getting up, though, Feferi gives him a sweet little smile and, with the tone of a gentle dom, says: "Please sit, Karkat."
She unfolds the letter, not looking to see if Karkat is obeying, and something small tumbles out. She catches it and holds it up. "Oh!" She gasps in delight, looking at the silver necklace dangling from her hand. It's got two wings spread out, linked in the middle by, bizarrely enough, a little cephalopod.
"Oh, Eridan, come put this on me!" Feferi says, glancing over her shoulder.
"You really wwant me to put another man's jewwelry on you?" Eridan complains, but slinks forwards anyway as Feferi gathers her thick curls and holds them up. He obligingly hooks the thin chain around her neck and secures it, and she touches the cephalopod with a grin.
Eridan looks unhappy, but Feferi reaches up to grab his chin and coos, "Eridan, don't be jealous. It's unbecoming."
He flushes hard but she doesn't let his chin go until he nods, upon which she smiles, pats his cheek lightly, and then tosses her curls out and picks up the letter (which looks like its 5 sheets of paper holy shit). Eridan slinks back to the doorframe again, but he looks a little less hostile now, more flustered.
She reads through it quickly, her expression going from curious to fond, before she folds the letter up and looks at Karkat.
"Well," she says, "seeing as Dave has apparently given me permission to ' air out all of his sicknasty dirty laundry ' that means that I can answer any questions you have--which I'm sure you have a lot." She giggles a little.
Feferi tears into the letter as Karkat rises to his feet, and Karkat opens his mouth to say something when Feferi looks up at him with a gentle smile and tells him—polite but undeniably firm —to sit down.
It’s like being ordered by a benevolent queen.
Karkat swallows, and takes a seat.
Feferi unfolds the letter and Karkat notices a flash of silver drop out of the paper and Feferi catches it swiftly. Then she’s calling over Eridan—and oh, that’s his name, then, Karkat thinks to himself. He hadn’t bothered to introduce himself to Karkat earlier.
Eridan comes over and helps Feferi put on the necklace, and Karkat feels like a voyeur watching the display, as though he ought to be watching this intimate little scene through a window instead of directly across from them, sitting on their couch. He averts his gaze when Feferi grabs Eridan by the chin.
Then Feferi is reading the letter and Karkat can’t help but watch, even though this feels invasive, too. He watches as her expression shifts as she reads through the letter, feeling his heart thudding against his ribs. Feferi sets the letter aside and looks up at Karkat.
And she’s saying she’ll answer any of Karkat’s questions.
That Dave gave her permission for her to tell him.
Does this mean Dave mentioned Karkat in his letter?
He has so many questions that he can’t pin any down, but that one sticks out in his mind. Karkat crosses his ankles and then uncrosses them. Plants his feet more firmly on the ground, staring at his shoes. He never took his shoes off, Feferi didn’t give him the chance. His well worn sneakers stand out like an ugly, gnarled thumb in this immaculate place.
“So Dave talked about me?” Karkat asks, “And he...mentioned me in the letter, too?”
It’s easier to ask questions that reach-around back to himself. That way, he doesn’t need to accidentally stumble upon something he wished he hadn’t. He wonders how long he can dodge around asking direct questions about Dave’s time here.
He has so many questions.
He just isn’t sure if he wants to know the answer to any of them.
"Oh, yes." Feferi agrees, and her smile turns a little wry, a little sad. "Dave talked about you quite a bit- to me. Knowing that boy, I doubt there's anyone else he would have told about you. Especially considering, well," she taps a finger on the letter, folded now in her lap, "everything he's been through. He told me a lot about you- what he did, how he was so sure that you hated him, his fear of reaching out and confirming it- That poor boy had an awful lot of knots tangled up inside that Damara used to sink her claws into and tie him down."
"He said he told you about a lot of it- Damara, what she put him through, the like- but if he didn't tell you about me, that means he probably didn't tell you anything about how he got out."
She shrugs. "Not that that particular story is overly important, I suppose, but if you'd like to hear it I'll tell it all the same."
Karkat nods along as Feferi speaks, a small frown pulling at his features.
Feferi says Damara and Karkat feels the blood in his veins go sluggish, and then turns to ice. At the same time, contrastingly so, he feels a heat in his chest that licks at his heart and threatens to choke his lungs with smoke.
It wasn’t exactly a name that fell from his or Dave’s lips often. Not since that first day. Every time Karkat hears it, he feels like he wants to reach out for Dave and hold him, hide him.
But Dave isn’t here.
Dave is back in Illinois, 2,139 miles away. He’s safe. Karkat doesn’t have to protect him.
He squeezes at his knees until his knuckles go white.
Karkat doesn’t want to talk to Feferi about Damara. Just the mention of her name has Karkat’s vision going hazy.
He’s listing the colours on the spines of the books on his shelf.
A sickening snap of a cane.
Dave’s muffled cry of pain.
Dave flinching beside him with every crack of the cane, like he can still feel it.
Karkat’s been quiet for too long. He looks up at Feferi, and lets go of the breath he didn’t realize he’d been holding.
She says that the story of how Dave got away isn’t important, but Karkat thinks that statement couldn’t be further from the truth.
It’s the only story that matters. The only story he has the stomach for.
“How did Dave get away?” he asks quietly.