Chapter Text
Keiji stood at the whiteboard with one of his classmates, focusing on removing all of the evidence from today’s lecture off the board. It was his last instance of cleaning duty as a second year, and he was trying his best not to get sentimental. Or think about how it was also Koutarou’s last year as a highschool student.
Once the duties were done and everything was cleaned, Keiji bowed to his classmate and bid them farewell, wishing them safe travels on their way home. He exited his classroom for the last time and started his journey to class 3-1, where Koutarou was struggling to get all of the dust and debris into the dust pan as his classmate looked on helplessly. Keiji stood in the doorway and watched the humorous scene before him, struggling to keep his lips from curving upward into a fond smile.
“Allow me, Bokuto-san.” Keiji stepped forward and reached out for the broom, causing Koutarou and his classmate to jump at the break in silence.
“Nah, I got it, ‘Kaashi. I won’t be too long, okay?” Koutarou held out his hand in refusal and scooted farther away from Keiji, leaving a pile of dust in his wake. Keiji chuckled softly and closed the distance between them, taking the broom from Koutarou and telling him to hold still as he swept the dust into the dustpan.
“Thanks. Who knows when we would have been able to leave!” Koutarou’s classmate laughed good-naturedly, clapping Koutarou on the shoulder. “I’ll see you at graduation!” He waved as he exited the classroom, leaving Keiji holding class 3-1’s broom and the rest of the cleaning supplies scattered around the room.
“Lemme put that away, then we can go home.” Keiji let Koutarou take the broom from him and watched as Koutarou scurried to the closet to pack up all of the cleaning supplies. Koutarou and Keiji usually signed up for cleaning duty on the same days when there wasn’t practice so they could walk home together, and since their unfortunate loss at nationals, they had signed up for cleaning duties more often. Keiji and the rest of the underclassmen had still held practice to prepare for next year, but it was voluntary for the third years--though they still always showed up as if nothing had changed.
It was a Wednesday, and there was no practice. It was a Wednesday, and it was the last day of the school year.
“Ready to rock and roll?” Koutarou emerged from the closet and dusted his hands off on his school pants. Keiji winced slightly.
“Bokuto-san, I told you to stop using that phrase. Who did you even hear that from?”
“An American movie! I think it’s a cool saying, so I’m gonna keep saying it.” Koutarou grinned and crossed his arms over his chest as the two volleyball players made their way toward the shoe lockers. They slipped on their street shoes in silence and Keiji paused when he noticed Koutarou lingering at his shoe locker, hands hovering over the small door that he had managed to decorate with volleyball and owl stickers.
“Are you okay?”
“Hey, ‘Kaashi?” Koutarou took Keiji’s silence as permission to continue. “D’ya think that...if I moved far away...we’d still be friends?”
Keiji was a bit surprised at Koutarou’s question. He’d struggled with the thought of Koutarou leaving him ever since nationals ended. He had friends and he still loved the team, but he’d be lonely without Koutarou’s constant presence. His constant brightness and energy. It would be like losing an arm or a leg. Keiji couldn’t quite see Koutarou’s face since he was facing his locker, but Keiji smiled in spite of himself.
“Of course. Why wouldn’t we?”
“I dunno.” Koutarou shrugged and turned around, shutting his locker in the process. “Sometimes people don’t keep their friends from high school.”
“We’re not ‘people’.” Keiji assured Koutarou quietly. Koutarou eyed Keiji for a beat before his lips spread into a wide, toothy grin.
“Right as always, Akaashi-kun!” Koutarou slung a heavy arm around Keiji’s neck and led him out of Fukurodani’s main building and into the evening glow of the courtyard.
“But what did you mean by ‘far away’?” Keiji managed to ask once Koutarou’s hold around his neck had loosened.
“Well, remember when that dude from Kansai offered me a position on their tryout team and a scholarship?”
“The scout?”
“That’s the one!”
“What about him?”
“I’ve been thinking about his offer...Kansai has a really great volleyball program and I—” Koutarou fully removed his arm from around Keiji’s neck and scratched the back of his head pensively, “I like the opportunity.”
Kansai University in Osaka. Seven hours away. Keiji had noticed the scout talking to Koutarou after the qualifiers for nationals, but he was too focused on keeping his underclassmen calm that he didn’t think much of it. He missed the chance to discourage Koutarou from moving away. He cursed himself.
It wasn’t that Keiji didn’t want Koutarou to follow his dreams—he just wished his dreams didn’t have to be so far away from Tokyo. From him.
“But I’m still considering Hosei and Tsukuba! Those are closer to home!” Koutarou said hurriedly after a prolonged period of silence from Keiji. Keiji blinked back to the present.
“But where do you want to go?” Keiji pressed. Koutarou’s shoulders slumped and he cocked his head to one side.
“Not sure.” Koutarou perked up as an idea entered his brain. “Hey, you wanna come over and help me look over all the schools? I trust your judgement and it’d really help me decide!”
“Of course, as long as food is involved.”
“Always!” Koutarou chuckled as Keiji pulled out his phone to let his mother know he’d be having dinner at the Bokuto residence.
Keiji savored the flavor of the pickled plum onigiri on his tongue as Koutarou rambled on and on about how Konoha embarrassed himself at lunch.
“—so then, Aki is holding his bento up like this,” Koutarou mimicked Konoha by thrusting both of his hands in the air and stretching them above his head, “while the squirrel just stares at him from his lap.” Koutarou took a breath to continue. “But the squirrel is really...tenacious?” Koutarou shot Keiji a look for confirmation and Keiji nodded absentmindedly; Boktuo happily continued. “The squirrel basically uses Aki’s balls as a trampoline and jumps up, swipes the bento, and runs away. Meanwhile, Aki is holding his balls in agony!” Koutarou finished the story by wheezing out a couple of laughs before dissolving into a fit of giggles.
Keiji couldn’t stop himself from giggling around his mouthful of rice until his eyes started to water. Koutarou eventually regained his composure and collapsed onto his bed, breathing heavily.
“I wish you’d sit with us at lunch instead of studying all the time.” Boktuo sat up to lean on his elbows as he watched Keiji reach for another onigiri. “Maybe then you wouldn’t have to stuff your face with onigiri.”
Keiji narrowed his eyes at Koutarou in a glare as he held his fourth onigiri close to his chest. He reminded Koutarou of the squirrel from lunch.
“Did ya like my story?”
“Yes, but I can’t help but feel bad for Konoha-san. He got his bento and his dignity stolen from him at the same time.” Keiji joked. Koutarou snorted.
“Sometimes he deserves it.” It was silent for a couple of beats.
“Bokuto-san, it’s getting late. Do you want me to help you or not?” Keiji gently reminded Koutarou of the whole reason he came over.
Begrudgingly, Koutarou stood and stretched before grabbing his laptop and flopping back down onto his bed next to Keiji. He laid on his belly and kicked his legs back and forth as he booted up his laptop and opened the scans of the letters that detailed each of his offers from the universities.
He angled the laptop toward Keiji so he could see better and Keiji scrolled through the first contract from Hosei, liking the promise of getting onto the team without trying out. Hosei was a private university in Tokyo, and an expensive one at that, so they must recruit all of their players since they had a smaller student population. The athletic scholarship was a plus, though.
The University of Tsukuba was a public university in Tokyo that offered Koutarou a spot on the tryout team which would hold a training camp for a week in April before making their decision. Keiji knew that they had Koutarou’s preferred major, Photography, which was quite difficult to get into. However, Koutarou was wickedly talented with a camera and had amazing spatial awareness, so Keiji had no doubt that he’d be able to get in without a problem.
Finally, Kansai University was a private school that was, again, seven hours away. Keiji picked apart the clauses and requirements in the contract, weighing the pros against the cons. No matter how much money they offered Koutarou, or how much they had praised his athletic prowess, Keiji could only see the school as the one that would take Koutarou seven hours away from him.
Suddenly, the half eaten onigiri didn’t seem so appetizing.
The room spun slightly as Keiji quickly stood and excused himself from Koutarou’s room, hurrying down the hall and to the bathroom, locking himself in. He plopped down on the tile floor, pressed his palms against his cheeks, and drew his knees up to his chest, feeling it rise and fall as he searched for oxygen to breathe.
Seven hours away. That’s literally across the country. He’d be too busy to visit. He’d never have enough time to travel across the country to come see us. To come see me. I’d be totally alone. I wouldn’t have anyone.
Keiji guessed it must’ve been about three more minutes of struggling to breathe and struggling to come to terms with Koutarou’s departure before he began to see minute green, red, and blue sparkles behind his closed eyelids and managed to cling on to a bit of oxygen that the universe had spared him. He released his head from his own grip and stretched out his legs, taking three deep breaths and rubbing his chest to help calm himself down. Just like Sarukui had taught him.
Well, I guess he hasn’t decided yet. I should support him. No matter what.
“Keiji? Are you okay in there?” A gentle knock sounded on the bathroom door and shook Keiji back to reality.
“Yeah, yes. I’m okay.” Keiji’s voice wavered as he shakily got to his feet. He moved over to the sink and mirror and frowned at the puffy, red eyes that stared back at him. He took a moment to turn on the sink and wash his face off, hopefully hiding any evidence of his panic attack from Koutarou. He knew how Koutarou would spiral if he found out.
Koutarou was sitting cross legged on the floor on his bed when Keiji returned, spreading himself out on the bed next to him. Koutarou tried not to notice Keiji’s damp, red eyes.
“You good?” Koutarou asked cautiously, peering down at Keiji, who was staring up at Koutarou’s ceiling. Keiji had always liked how Koutarou kept everything from his childhood; he had volleyball posters pasted on to the ceiling and Christmas lights strung up around his window, not to mention his previous volleyball jerseys from middle school that were pinned to one wall. His room was bright, just like him.
Everyone could use a little brightness in their life, and Keiji didn’t like to think of himself as a selfish person.
“I think you should try for Kansai. If that’s your dream.” Keiji took a deep breath and continued. “They could use someone like you, Bokuto-san.”
Koutarou felt his heart drop to the pit of his stomach at Keiji’s words. He thought that Keiji would surely suggest for him to go to one of the universities in Tokyo. He had hoped that Keiji would want him to go to one of the universities in Tokyo.
“If that’s what you think is best, then...I’ll consider Kansai more seriously.” Koutarou said slowly. Keiji sat up and began to fumble with his fingers, his stomach turning over and over in his abdomen at the dejected tone of Koutarou’s voice. Koutarou reached over and grabbed Keiji’s hands in his one large hand, halting Keiji’s bad habit momentarily. Keiji peeked up at Koutarou’s eyes, golden and flecked with green. He began to feel nauseous. He began to feel like his heart was going to escape from the prison of his rib cage and tear through his chest.
Before he knew it, Keiji was collecting his things from around Koutarou’s room and scurrying out of the door and down the stairs, pausing quickly to bow toward Koutarou’s parents. The chilly October air nipped at Keiji’s cheeks and nose and, suddenly, he felt calm.