Chapter 1: i
Chapter Text
For the first time in days , it’s quiet.
The villains of the week have been subdued, a rogue alien looking for revenge in all the wrong places was finally apprehended with help from Alex and a team from the DEO, and finally, gloriously, Kara is off work and off duty .
The stillness is so welcomed that when Kara closes all the windows in her apartment and flops belly down onto her bed, her heavy eyes sting with relief. It isn’t late, the clock in the kitchen says it is after eleven PM but Supergirl has been needed across the city so much lately that any time before the sun comes up feels like a win. And before midnight feels like a dream.
She’s so tired that for the first time in months, she doesn’t think about anything. No reflection of the day, no anxiety about what tomorrow may bring, not even a fantasy.
Without getting undressed or completing even one step of her usual nighttime routine, Kara feels herself sinking quickly into a deep sleep and surrenders to it completely.
Some time later, she wakes in the same position she fell asleep in.
The ringer on her phone is obnoxiously loud for someone whose hearing is quite literally out of this world but considering the way her eyes roll back in her head on the first two attempts to open them, Kara can concede that maybe it was set to that level for good reason. She drops her phone the first time she picks it up and the bright screen pierces through her skull by the time she finally has a good hold of it.
Kara rolls onto her back and pushes the heel of a palm into the offended eye socket. “Hello?”
The silence she’s met with is loud but not louder than the call of sleep. Kara feels her body begin to slacken again and she knows she’s got a job to do —two, actually— but is one night of unbroken rest really too much to ask for?
“Alex, please don’t make me fight anyone else. I wouldn’t even last a round, I—”
“Lost your stamina?”
Just like that, Kara’s eyes are wide open. “Lena.” In the delayed pause, her heart beats with anticipation. Ice clinks against glass and she hears Lena swallow and make a vague noise of confirmation. “How-how are you?”
“Don’t do that.” A clear order.
“Sorry.”
“Or that.”
Kara grimaces. In a way, it feels like a habit to apologise, like a knee-jerk reaction to finally be allowed to speak to her. Lena’s refused and rejected every attempt at communication for three months and it’s been three months of Kara being desperate to apologise, even if she does recognise that on some level there is nothing else she can do until Lena is ready. Helpless isn’t something Kara is used to being.
“Do you need something?” she asks carefully. “Can I do anything for you?”
“What were you doing when I called?”
Lena’s voice is low and a little scratchy; the way it gets when she’s tired, Kara thinks. She wonders if there was a Luthor event in the city tonight or if it’s a regular night. Or as regular night as she knows Lena has, anyway.
“Uh- just a work thing.”
“Lie again and I’ll hang up.”
Kara swallows thickly. “I was asleep. I didn’t- I didn’t want you to think you were bothering me.”
“I don’t much care if I’m bothering you.”
“Okay,” is all Kara can think to say at first. “For what it’s worth, I’m glad you called. It’s good to hear your voice.” Ice clinks against a glass then, and it goes so quiet that she has to check that their call hasn’t been disconnected.
“I hate you.” Lena says it softly but surely, easy like she’s wholly ignorant to the pain that spikes through Kara’s chest the moment it’s out there.
Kara concentrates on breathing evenly first. She doesn’t know what to say in response or how to make it better. She blinks rapidly to clear her vision.
Lena’s voice is harder this time. “Did you hear me?”
“Yeah," Kara confirms quietly.
“I hate you.” This time Lena sounds troubled by it and Kara can imagine the expression she must be wearing.
“Are you drinking?”
A short laugh bursts across the line in response. “You think I need alcohol to feel like this?”
“No,” Kara admits. “Will you— please talk to me.”
“Shut up.”
“Why did you call me if you don’t want to talk?” She can’t help frustration leaking into her voice but even if Lena is hurting her, she doesn’t want her to hang up. Kelly will have a field day with that nugget if she ever finds out but as pathetic as it is, it’s the truth. “Or I can listen. Is that what you need right now? You need to hurt me back?”
“You’ve no idea what I need .”
“Then tell me.”
“I doubt you could handle it.” Lena scoffs and drinks from her glass again until it’s empty. “I can scarcely handle it.”
“I’m always going to be here. Whatever you need, I— I’ll always be here for you, Lena.”
“You haven’t asked why I hate you.”
Kara doesn’t even need to close her eyes to see the look of total betrayal and heartbreak on Lena’s face upon finding out her secret anymore. She should have just been honest with her from the start and then maybe they could have avoided this.
“I don’t need to.”
“Ask me.”
The low demand stills something inside of Kara and she prepares herself, though not entirely sure for what. “Why do you hate me?”
“Because you ruined me,” Lena says. “Destroyed everything I thought I knew about myself, that I worked so hard to rebuild. You made me soft. It’s been months and I’ve barely stopped thinking about you. How pathetic is that?”
“It’s not,” Kara assures her, heart lurching with hope. “I think about you too. Every day.”
“It is when…”
“When, what?” If the past few months have taught Kara anything, it’s that she will be able to handle whatever Lena has to say to her just as long as they’re talking. “Please.”
“When I’m getting fucked by someone and all I see when I close my eyes is— your stupid face.”
Something hot spikes through Kara’s body and she knows that even if Lena hangs up right now, she won’t be sleeping again for a while. There’s so much to process in such a short time that she doesn’t know how to distinguish feelings of jealousy and regret and how, in spite of those, she can still find a fraction of relief in Lena’s confession along with an undercurrent of interest.
“I want it to stop.” There’s a hitch to Lena’s breath. “I need it to stop, Kara. And God knows I’m probably going to hate myself for this but I need—”
“What can I do?”
Lena’s moan is soft, relieved, and it’s only then that Kara’s brain catches up with her enough to consider that she has potentially just crossed into dangerous territory without necessarily meaning to. Perhaps the state of their relationship has never been worse, but this could still do more damage.
Lena must be thinking something similar because she doesn’t respond right away. Lena is a lot of things but impulsive is not one of them. Kara knows she will be thinking about this. Or maybe she’s already given so much to Kara that verbalising what she wants is a step too far.
The sudden visual of Lena with a hand working between her legs hits Kara like a freight train and she has to remind herself that she wasn’t the one who started this when guilt tries to gnaw its way in.
God, or maybe she’s gotten this all wrong and wishful thinking has her jumping to conclusions.
“Lena.”
“Talk to me.”
In an instant, blood rushes between Kara’s legs. Lena’s needy gasp decimates Kara’s doubt and she licks out at her dry lips, one of her legs falling open against the comforter as she decides how to start whatever it is they’re about to do.
“Are you sure? If you’ve been drinking, maybe you don’t—”
“Think I would've called you otherwise?”
Lena's voice sounds so different but it’s one Kara has heard in her own head many times before. Allowing her mind to wander during fantasies is one thing, but as willing of a participant as she is, the transition to being able to form certain words and phrases to help her best friend orgasm is not without trepidation. Kara wishes Lena was there , so she didn’t have to talk, she could just touch her.
“Can I come over?”
“No,” Lena says at once. “Come over and this is done. I can’t.”
“Okay,” Kara quickly relents. She’s never done anything like this before, least of all with someone like Lena, but the admission that Lena can’t stop thinking of her even when her body is overcome with pleasure is enough to spur her on a little bit. “Are you…”
“Say it.”
“Are you touching yourself.”
“Yes,” Lena admits without a hint of shame.
“How wet are you?” Kara’s eyes slip shut when Lena moans.
“Soaked.”
“Because of me?”
“Yes.”
Just like that, Kara is wet. She still has her clothes on; was too tired to change out of them earlier and now her jeans feel like a prison. “I’m going to do this with you, okay?”
“No, I’m too— I’ve been close for hours, don’t make me wait for you to catch up.”
Kara doesn’t bother telling her that it really wouldn’t take very long at all, but she doesn’t say that. “You’re into edging?”
Lena laughs low and breathy. “Not at this particular moment.”
“If I was there… I wouldn’t give you what you wanted right away. You know that, right? I’d want you crazy, out of your mind first.”
“This isn’t crazy?” Lena asks, her voice clipped and struggling.
“Where are you?”
“In bed.”
“Which side?”
“Left.”
Kara begins to picture it. “Are you wearing anything?”
“Just an old shirt. A t-shirt. It’s so soft that— that it feels good to touch myself over it.”
“Is that what you’re doing now, touching your breasts?”
“Alternating,” Lena confesses. “But they’re sensitive, so I can barely…” a long, soft moan cuts through. “I can barely touch my nipples without it hurting , but it feels so good to trace over them like this.”
“I’d be gentle.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. I’d use my tongue… feel how hard and hot they were for me.”
“Are you imagining it?”
“Yeah,” Kara says, unable to picture anything else. “Thinking about how they’d feel if I teased you and brushed over them with my mouth, my lips, until you begged me to use my tongue.”
“God,” Lena whines.
“I wish I was touching you.”
“You are.”
Kara puts the phone on the bed while she pushes, pulls, and kicks her jeans and underwear off. It’s ruined, anyway. She hasn’t been wet so quickly in so long that the second she’s able to, she’ll be getting herself off. “Open your legs.”
Lena doesn’t quite laugh at that but she makes a sound close to it. “If you think they haven’t been spread since before I heard your voice, you’re giving me too much credit.”
“How long?”
“I don’t know, around eleven? On and off.” Lena gasp gives way to a heavy breath. “Every time I get close, all I can think about is you and- and I hate it, Kara. This— this is going to help. I just have to get you out of my system. Just once, to make it stop."
“I thought you didn’t think about me while you were doing it?”
“Fuck you.”
Lena gasps again and moans low in her throat and Kara feels it like a physical touch. “Tell me how you feel.”
“God, I’m so wet.”
“Me too,” Kara admits. “Are you close?”
“Yes.”
“What would you want first, mouth or fingers?”
Lena moans helplessly, breathless in her chase. “Your mouth.”
“Good, because I don’t think I’d be able to resist tasting you. I’d make you feel so good, Lena. You know that, don’t you?”
“I know. God, I know. I’m so close— I’ve been close for hours but I couldn’t— not without hearing your voice.”
“You sound so good.”
“So do you,” Lena sighs. “Will you touch yourself after this?”
“Yeah.”
“Will it be fast or slow?”
Kara presses her thighs together and groans at the pressure. “Slow isn’t really viable anymore,” she says, unbothered by how shaky her voice has gone. “I haven’t even touched myself and I already know I’m going to come harder than I have in a long time.”
Lena’s response is a breathy, pitched moan that doesn’t stop or slow. It rises steadily and Kara clenches around nothing the longer she’s privileged enough to be able to listen.
“Lena.”
“Kara,” she gasps. “God, I’m— I’m going to-”
“It’s okay, I’m here.”
Kara holds her breath the whole time Lena rises higher and higher, through every gasp and moan until Kara’s wound so tightly that she thinks she’s legitimately going to come the second she hears her.
Where Kara expects to hear Lena’s orgasm, she hears the dial tone.
There isn’t much time for disappointment before Kara’s spreading her legs and feeling her way through her drenched folds to her swollen, throbbing clit. She doesn’t preamble with fingers inside of herself this time; they’re nice but not a necessity. She doesn’t feel like she’ll die if she doesn’t fuck herself like that. No, all it takes is a minute of blissful alternation between slick circles and frantic sweeping until she’s coming hard, imagining the way Lena must have sounded.
A week later and Kara still checks her call-log and scrolls down to where there is irrefutable evidence of Lena’s phone call. The morning after didn’t feel real; she was half convinced it was part of a sleep-deprived delirium she’d imagined until she checked her phone and found her jeans and underwear on the floor in the same turned out way she’d kicked them off.
She’s been distracted ever since it happened, and despite not enjoying lying to Alex and her friends, it’s been for the best. She can’t exactly come out with the truth that Lena called her out of the blue for what was essentially a booty call and after she finished and hung up Kara fucked herself three times before she felt even vaguely satisfied and relaxed enough to fall back asleep.
Kara can’t say that she's not been glued to her phone ever since in case it happens again, that every time her phone rings she hopes it’s Lena. She wants to call, to ask if she’s alright more than anything, but the likelihood of that being received well is low at best. Lena deserves her space and privacy and Kara will respect it.
The next time she sees Lena, it’s by accident and from a distance.
Nightly patrol has been quiet compared to the weeks before and Kara’s plans for the rest of the evening involve takeout, ice cream and a comfort movie she’s seen at least a dozen times. With so much uncertainty lately, it’s going to be nice to know what happens in the end. A happy ending for all who deserve it.
Kara’s cradling her food and two pints of ice cream when she spots Lena walking arm in arm with a tall, attractive Asian woman towards what she knows to be Lena’s favourite bistro this side of the city.
Kara doesn’t linger, doesn’t frown. In fact, she barely reacts at all.
If she kicks off a shoe when she gets home and it breaks the plaster on the wall, that’s just an accident.
She’s surprised when her phone rings on the nightstand several hours later.
Kara isn’t asleep but she isn’t quite awake either and the second she sees Lena’s name and contact photo lighting up her screen, she can’t help but wish Lena would have called sooner when her mental state and energy is more able to handle whatever is about to happen. It’s a fleeting thought because who is she trying to kid? She answers the call without hesitation.
“Hello?”
“Hi.”
A small thrill goes through Kara. They may have crossed an unspoken boundary during a particularly tumultuous time in their friendship, but having Lena call again? It sends a clear message and one she doesn’t intend to take lightly.
Lena needs her.
“I wasn’t sure you’d call again,” Kara admits. “I’m glad you did.”
“Call it curiosity.”
“How so?”
“I wasn’t sure if you had spontaneously combusted after our last… interaction.”
Kara laughs softly. “ Well , not yet, anyway.” She hears bottles clinking and the pouring of liquid and wonders if it’s liquor or simply a glass of water. Kara doesn’t ask.
Lena hums softly. “I’ll have to try harder.”
The idea that they could do that again makes Kara’s head spin a little. She hopes Lena doesn’t hear the shaky exhale. “Not too hard.”
“No? You enjoyed it?”
“Yes,” Kara says clearly. “Did— did you?”
“Sort of a redundant question, don’t you think?”
“I don’t know. No?”
“Would I be calling again if I didn’t?” Lena asks evenly. “Christ, Kara, you’re the only person who’s heard me getting off in a long time, and the only person who’s been able to personally help me with that particular problem in even longer.”
Kara swallows. “I thought it was just going to be the one time. Y’know, get me out of your system.”
“Do you want it to be a one-time thing?”
“That’s not what I’m saying.”
“Your foot just naturally fits in your mouth like that?”
Kara smiles. It appears she doesn’t know how to stop. “You know me.” The words are out there before she can stop them and while they’re certainly fitting for the current topic, they have the power to derail the entire call. If anything is going to kill a mood before it’s even started, it’s that.
Luckily for Kara, Lena was either expecting it or she simply doesn’t care.
“I want you to come tonight.” Before Kara blurts out something stupid like over , Lena adds, “I’d like to hear you.”
The verbal confirmation that they’re going to explore their new dynamic is enough to start Kara off, heating her blood instantly. She licks her lips. “Are you sure?”
“You think I’d voice that request if I wasn’t?”
“Lena.”
“I’m sure.” Lena doesn’t mean to snap —it’s more of a mild annoyance if anything because if her once best friend doesn’t know that there is no way in hell she would be doing this if she didn’t want to, if she didn’t, however unwillingly, trust Kara with this, then did she ever know her at all? “As long as you’re amenable, Kara, I’m offering my complete consent. Is that okay, or would you like it in writing as well?”
For the first time, Lena’s snipe and the crystal clear memory of their last phone call just makes Kara smile. “I’m good,” she says softly.
“Good.”
“You know, a week ago, the morning after we— I’d convinced myself it was a dream. I was scared to check my call log.”
“Do you have many wet dreams about me, Kara?”
Kara laughs suddenly, though she can’t help but feel like she’s been missing out on an essential experience. “No.”
“Shame.”
“You, uh, you hung up last time,” Kara ventures hesitantly. “Before I could…”
“If you’re worried I didn’t complete the mission , I’m happy to inform you that I did.”
“No, before I could tell you that you sounded beautiful.” Kara shifts further down the bed until she's comfortable. “I've been thinking about it.”
“What have you been thinking?”
“That it was— perfect. I won’t lie and say I wasn’t surprised, but it was amazing. You were amazing. Everytime I think about it at work I feel like someone’s going to be able to tell because I get so-”
“Wet?”
“I was gonna say frustrated.”
“You don’t have to censor yourself, Kara.” It’s perhaps the kindest thing Lena has said in a long time, and the accompanied sigh she receives feels like surrender.
“The day after, I was wet more times than I wasn’t. All I had to do was think about you and I would… god, get so distracted. You have no idea.”
“I wouldn’t be so sure.”
“Yeah?”
“Would it excite you to know I was soaked through a two-hour meeting this afternoon because of you?”
The sudden rush of blood between Kara’s legs isn’t a surprise but the proof of how easy she is for Lena still comes as one. She switches the phone to her left hand and traces over and around a nipple until it’s at a stiff peak.
“Really?”
“Knowing you were wet, desperate to touch yourself while you heard me doing the same; that I was the cause of it? God, yes.”
“You sounded so good.”
“Did you come thinking of me?”
“Yes,” Kara sighs. “The second you hung up the phone, I- I couldn’t wait.”
“Did it take long?”
“I really want to tell you that I had enough self-control to drag it out longer than a teenage boy, but… no. Not at all.”
Lena makes a soft, amused sound. “I’ll take that as a compliment for now,” she says. “Tell me what you were thinking.”
Kara clenches almost violently at the memory and she knows she’s already getting wet. “The way you sounded. The things you said. Knowing you were fucking yourself for me… God, it was…” Her tongue wets dry lips before she voices a request of her own. “Take off whatever you’re wearing above the waist but not below it. You’ll get what you want, I promise, but I need to hear you too.”
There’s some shuffling around and a small clunk which Kara attributes to Lena placing her phone down to remove her top and bra. She takes that time to do the same and the sensation of being able to touch skin, to knead softly at her breast, is heady.
“Okay,” Lena says after a moment.
“Tell me what you’re doing.”
“Working my fingers over my clit, gently, on top of my underwear.”
Kara’s teeth sink into her lower lip briefly, a quiet moan slipping out. “You weren’t supposed to do that yet.”
“You told me not to take off anything below the waist, not that I couldn’t touch anything below it,” Lena challenges. “Tell me to stop.”
“I can't.”
“Where’s your hand, Kara?”
“On my breasts. Playing… tugging.”
“Does it feel good?”
“Yeah,” Kara sighs, her hand slipping down to cup herself briefly. The pressure is momentarily relieved until she hears Lena beginning to get affected by her own ministrations. “I wish it was you.”
“I’ve been imagining your hands in so many places,” Lena says. “For— for a lot longer than a week.”
“Yeah?”
“They’re… they always know exactly what I want. How hard I want it.”
Kara’s hips rise off the bed and she tosses the remainder of her pyjamas to the floor. She settles back down with her legs spread. “They’re some big expectations to live up to.”
“You’d love to try.”
“I’d be better.” Judging by the sound Lena makes, she doesn’t doubt it. “Dip your fingers inside, just enough to get them wet.” Lena's sharp intake of breath has Kara clenching again and she lowers her own hand into blissful heat, spreading wetness around without touching her clit directly.
“Okay.”
“Put them in your mouth, tell me how good you taste.” Kara hears Lena release the tips of her fingers and her hips roll into her hand instinctively. The friction of her fingers finally albeit slowly working over her clit has her moaning at the back of her throat.
“So good,” Lena sighs. “I’m taking off my pants now. You’re going to have to tell me to stop if you don’t want me to.”
Kara’s fingers continue to work, spurred on by Lena’s voice alone. “Take them off. Panties too.”
“Tell me how you feel.”
“I’m so wet,” Kara says. “Your— your voice . Rao, I— I want to hear you. Touch yourself. Please. For me.”
Lena’s breath comes heavy and then clipped and Kara moans because being able to tell Lena what to do and hearing her pleasure herself right on the other end of the phone just about boils her blood.
“I wish I was there,” Kara gasps.
“You are.”
“Tell me where I am, what I’m doing.”
Lena moans. “Behind me. Biting my neck, fucking me slow and shallow, and it’s… god, it’s good but it’s not enough and you know it, and I— I love every fucking second of it."
At that visual, Kara whines and cants her hips into her fingers one last time before repositioning her hand, pushing two fingers inside herself. If anyone had told her a month ago that she would soon be on a late-night phonecall with Lena Luthor getting each other off, quite brazenly fucking herself to nothing but Lena’s voice and a fantasy, Kara would have had their mental faculties tested.
And, God, maybe she needs to have her own tested to be doing this with someone she still loves so dearly, but she can’t stop. She can’t, and she doesn’t want to.
“Are you inside?”
“Yeah,” Kara moans.
“Tell me how you feel.”
“God, I’m— I’m so hot and wet ." Kara slows her fingers long enough to grind against the heel of her palm. Her nipples are criminally untouched but she doesn’t want to put Lena on speakerphone. Having Lena in her ear, hearing every little sound of pleasure, she needs it close. Another high, feminine moan has Kara’s cunt answering with a fresh pulse. “I want to taste you,” she gasps. “So badly, I- I can almost feel you pulling on my hair.”
Lena moans helplessly.
“Tell me you’d want it.”
“I’d want it,” Lena answers. “You know I would.”
Kara’s so far gone inside her own head, swept away in a sea of lust and fantasy, and her hand doesn’t stop moving. It’s been so long since she was this vocal in her pleasure and she might feel some sort of way about it if Lena wasn’t right there with her, clearly enjoying it just as much.
It takes Kara higher hearing it.
The longer they lie there fucking themselves into a stupor, the more Kara wants and the less she cares about how she says it.
“I wanna fuck you so bad.” Her heels dig into the mattress and she turns her head, trapping the phone between her ear and the pillow. Lena’s breathing harder now and Kara knows she’s not too far off an orgasm because neither is she.
“I think about that.”
“Tell me.”
“You’re wearing my favourite toy, and it’s- it’s not huge but God, it fills me perfectly, Kara, and you use it like it’s always been a part of you. You fuck me right into the bed and then…” Lena struggles through a gasp and a high moan. “And when I’ve come, when I see how badly you need me, you’re on your back and I'm riding you until my name is the only word you know.”
It’s all both of them need to hit the point of no return, for it to go from just feeling amazing to being actively chasing a climax within reach.
Lena’s heavy, shuddering breaths do the same to Kara and it isn’t long until they're coming out faster and faster. “I'm gonna come,” Lena gasps out quietly.
Several seconds pass until Kara hears a sharp intake of breath and she knows Lena’s coming silently. It takes but a few more slick presses to her clit before Kara has to drop the phone on the bed, afraid she might crush it as she cries out. Her orgasm is long and intense, and by the time she’s recovered enough to pick her phone back up, Lena is no longer on the line but a single texts waits.
Thank you.
Almost a block away and Kara can still feel the club’s music pumping vibrations in her chest. She’s out late on a night free of drama and work, instead celebrating Kelly’s birthday a couple of days early as it falls on a work day this year. Not including two memorable nights recently, it’s been one of the best in months with Alex, Kelly, Nia. Her girls. J’onn and Brainy joined them hours earlier for dinner and then both politely left the women to it.
The outside air is balmy instead of the cool Kara longs it to be and the floating sensation she keeps experiencing is almost certainly due to the small hip flask Alex passed over at the start of the night so Kara could enjoy herself like the others. Luckily her arm is locked securely in Nia’s as they walk off their inebriation and she’s fairly sure Nia would tell her if she really was drifting off. Either that, or hiss that she was floating too and tell her to quit it before the nice people with high definition camera phones saw everything.
Kelly’s ringtone is still on maximum volume and it sounds abruptly: a throwback r&b song Nia dances to as they walk, cajoling Kara into some silly moves without much effort at all.
“Lena, hey!”
Kara stops walking to listen —through the speaker volume alone, no powers necessary—
“Hi, honey. I’m calling to say how sorry I am that I couldn’t make it tonight.”
Nia lurches back a step, still attached to Kara through their joined arms.
Kelly’s head inclines. “We talked about this.”
“I know, but still. I can’t have you thinking that I didn’t appreciate the invitation. It really meant a lot to me.”
It’s different to hear Lena acting soft with Kelly. Too many things for Kara to be able to identify and she allows Nia’s tug to spring her back into step. They follow behind Alex and Kelly at a reasonable but close distance.
The thing with Kelly is that she always understands. The only gripes Alex has about Kelly to Kara (after Kara actively fishes) is that they rarely argue and if they do, it’s resolved so quickly that it might as well not happen.
Lena deserves someone like Kelly in her life.
“Promise me,” Kelly slurs a little, “promise me we’ll go for lunch soon. Whenever you’re free.”
“I promise.”
Kara can tell Lena is smiling and her own features soften in response to it.
Two weeks have passed since their last phone call and whenever Kara isn’t overcome with lust she cringes at the memory of some of the wording she’s used with Lena; wonders how she’ll ever be able to look her in the eyes again without wanting to bury herself alive.
A problem for another day.
When Kara eventually makes her way home she stumbles over to the fridge for a bottle of water and downs a little more than half in one go, swiping a stray drop off her chin with the back of her hand as she heads into her room.
The bed is covered in accessories, dresses, and outfits earlier deemed to be unfit for the night’s outing. Kara puts the bottle down on a clear spot of her nightstand and leans over her bed, arms spread wide to gather up as much as she can in one go. All of it is dispersed onto the floor. It feels like an achievement and she stumbles back over an errant heel, bouncing onto the bed.
The only reason Kara takes a makeup wipe to her face is because it’s cool against her skin. Her head sways to a tune only she can hear as she takes her time removing it.
Finally reclined, refusing yet to stumble to the bathroom and brush her teeth, Kara is unable to think of anything but Lena. She knows it’s the alcohol in her system and she’s honestly good for nothing but it’s Lena . She misses her. She wants to tell her so.
There isn’t much room in Kara’s head for a debate and so she blows out a big breath and crosses her legs at the ankle and holds the phone up to her ear. Her head moves softly with Kelly’s ringtone still in it.
It rings for a long time.
“Yes?”
The tone is already a little short but Kara grins anyway. “Lena.”
“Kara,” Lena mutters with some surprise.
“Don’t be mad,” Kara pleads. “You have mad voice.”
Lena pauses. “Are you drunk?”
“Depends if you’re mad.”
“I’m busy.”
Well, that kills Kara’s buzz a little. “Oh.”
“It’s a busy time at work,” Lena explains. “I’m swamped; drowning in paperwork and proposals…”
“Apology accepted.”
“I’m not sure I offered you one.”
“You did,” Kara says.
“Did you… call for a specific purpose? Because I am genuinely buried in reports and to be perfectly honest with you, Kara, I haven’t had the time to even begin processing— everything. And even if I had, I’m not sure I can right now. I hope you understand.”
“No, I do,” Kara says softly. “I didn’t call for that. Honestly, ‘m too—'m too drunk to get it up. Like get off. Touch—”
“So, why are you calling?”
Kara’s grin and tone is lazy. “I really want to sing that line from that Stevie Wonder song but just change a word. I’m gonna try.”
“Please refrain from drunken karaoke, Kara.”
She manages to obey, but only just.
“I miss you.” Kara hears Lena swallow and the weight of that admission makes her chest feel lighter. “That's all.” For the first time all night, she wishes she was clearer headed so she could articulate it better, explain all of the terrible ways in which she misses her best friend. “That’s all I wanted to say.”
“Drink some water.”
At last, not just a dial tone. It feels like progress.
“Night, Lena.”
Work picks up considerably for Kara over the next work week, both in the office and Supergirl duties. She’s given two last-minute articles to write and it would have been difficult enough without Supergirl being on high alert for a potential threat involving a human displaying powers, but they’re the cards she’s dealt.
Not without pain, the articles get written. She won’t claim they’re her best work any time soon, but they’re written and she vows to do better next time.
As always, Brainy and Alex come through with a location within minutes of her arriving at the DEO and fill Kara in as she’s flying across the city. The human displaying powers is a white male, mid-20’s, who is aggressive and antagonistic towards his roommate and law enforcement who were called to a domestic disturbance in an apartment block.
EMT are outside the building with another male inside, in the process of administering heavy-duty pain relief to what Kara sees is a shattered arm. The tension rises when she calmly brushes her way past the barricade of police officers surrounding the second floor’s hallway and enters the apartment.
It looks like they’ve been robbed.
Everything is smashed or overturned. The man’s rage is palpable when he spots Kara and she catches a kitchen chair with one hand when it’s hurled her way. It happens suddenly and while she’s confident she can subdue him, the thick, dark veins stretching down from his head all the way down his neck and arms tells her it won’t be without human casualties —him included, if they stay there.
She uses her super speed to catch him off-guard.
Miles away, behind an abandoned building, their feet touch ground.
He swings out instantly in retaliation; an uppercut that sends her staggering.
Alex’s voice is in her ear. “Kara, we think he’s on some garage-created steroids: low-cost and really dangerous. The effects wear off like a high but be careful. A team’s on its way.”
His strength and weight overpower Kara to the ground and her face turns with the force of a blow to her face. Using an arm to block his attack, she manages to work a leg up and kick out. He sails through the air.
“You okay?”
Kara’s about to answer when she hears her phone ringing. Alex has her phone. And she knows —she knows there are more pressing matters at hand but she can’t help but wonder.
“Who’s calling me?”
“You think now’s the time?”
“Alex.”
Alex sighs. “It’s Lena,” she says. “But you have a job to do right now, okay. That guy you’re with is dangerous. Focus. You can’t actually hurt him but he can and will try to hurt you.”
Alex is right, he is. But Lena is calling her during the day and, unless she’s taken to day-drinking, is sober. In the moment, Kara doesn’t care if Lena’s calling for an afternoon delight or to make the first step in the recovery of their friendship. It’s another win.
Back on his feet, the angry white man Kara isn’t sure she would even be able to single out in a lineup charges towards her, a feral growl tearing from his throat. Spit flies from his mouth and Kara rests her weight on one leg, biding her time until he’s close enough to reach out and flick his forehead. He drops to the ground unconscious.
“Cancel the team,” Kara commands. “I’m bringing him in and then there’s somewhere I have to be.”
Kara was going to clean up and get coffee and work up the nerve to respond to Lena’s call but Nia calls her back into the office and she spends the next four hours reworking her articles that were sent back to her with the order to rework them into a better narrative.
By the time she’s finished there and has checked in with Alex and Brainy to see how their newest detainee is, it’s early evening and Kara is starving .
A shower and a change of clothes later and Kara sits down with a large bowl of steaming teriyaki beef noodles. Credit to her self-restraint, she savours every bite and conjures up a dozen reasons why Lena decided to call her earlier. Kara received no reply to her I’m really sorry, duty called text but she wasn’t really expecting one.
While that’s true, she’s still anxious when she has her phone held up to her ear.
Almost convinced she won’t answer, Lena picks up the call at the last second.
“Hello?”
“Hey, it’s Kara.”
“I have caller ID,” Lena says, not unkindly.
“Right, yeah. I just— am returning your call from earlier. I was on Supergirl duties and then I was called back into the office and I couldn’t get away.”
“Of course.”
She wasn’t making this easy. Kara perseveres. “So, why did you call?”
“I don’t remember.”
“Come on,” Kara dares to smile. “You called me.”
Lena exhales softly. “A conference call didn’t end favourably and I was… frustrated.”
“I’m sorry I wasn’t there.”
“Don’t be.”
While Kara is elated to hear Lena confirm wanting to continue the new facet of their relationship, part of her is still terrified of doing anything to spook her. Walking on eggshells is not something she wishes to do moving forward. Whatever the truth, painful or otherwise, Kara wants it to be spoken.
“I’m sorry about the other night, for calling out of the blue like that. I was kinda drunk, not sure if you could tell.”
“I had an inkling.”
“But I need to know: where do I stand?”
“Excuse me?”
“Like… we did that thing twice.” There’s a scoff in her ear. “And it was— great. But where do I stand? Is it okay if I call you now? And if it is, can I call you just to say hi or do my hands have to be in my pants for it to be okay?” It isn’t a bad day that’s caused her to say this, and it isn’t said with malice, but she knows that without it, she wouldn’t have had the courage.
Lena is infuriatingly slow to respond. “How did that feel to say?”
“My heart’s beating really fast,” Kara admits. Things settle. “Look, Lena, I don’t want to fight anymore. About this or anything. And this isn’t about pressure because you know I’m always going to be here. I just need to know where I stand and what chance we have of… of being us again.”
“To answer your question: you can call any time after seven most days. If I don’t answer, it’s because I can’t. But like I said the other day, I can’t handle anything more than what we’ve been doing yet. And if me telling you that means that you’re no longer interested in this, then okay. No hard feelings.”
“But we have so much to talk about,” Kara says. “Especially now.”
“Kara, those are my terms. I didn’t say they’d be forever but what I’m not going to do is put a timeframe on it. That wouldn’t be fair to me or you. Similarly, there isn't a timeframe on this new development for me either. The two aren’t exclusive. Whatever has happened between us… I would never do that. I hope that's not something you question."
“Okay.”
“Okay, so I’m going to hang up and we can both process this conversation before the next time we talk.”
“Wait, are we not going to—”
“My nipples inverted as soon as you said, ‘did that thing twice’, so no.”
Kara laughs loudly. “I was nervous.”
Lena hums. “I’ll call you when I get into bed, but it might be late. Don’t stay up for me. Sometimes our schedules are going to clash and that’s fine.”
“Okay.”
“Like you mean it.”
“I promise.”
Kara is exhausted when she hangs up.
She’s true to her word and doesn’t stay up for Lena, but she is still awake when Lena calls. By the time their call has ended and she’s come down from a devastating orgasm, Kara falls asleep effortlessly.
For the next month, things are kept relatively consistent. Several times per week, excluding the one with Lena’s monthly cycle, they call each other and describe in excruciating detail how they’d touch each other, how they want to be touched, and how they’re fucking themselves.
It’s been a long time since Kara has had regular orgasms— and never so many. Despite that, she remains desperately, frustratingly horny.
They send no dirty texts.
She’s not entirely sure why or if it’s intentional, it just happens to work out that way.
As much as Kara wants to click send every time she composes a message, she never does. She’s at work, legs spread slightly as she reclines back in her chair and it’s so easy to picture Lena on her knees, to imagine how perfectly her head would fit in the space between and how soft her hair would be. As badly as she wants Lena like that, there is something Kara desires far greater.
She checks the time—1:57pm.
Kara picks up her phone and types quickly.
Busy ?
Unfortunately. Headed to a meeting.
That’s too bad.
Leave me a voicemail.
That’s how Kara finds herself locked in an empty restroom several minutes later, describing in delicious detail exactly how she would eat her out if she was there. Kara finishes it with a demand for Lena not to come until she can hear her later.
Lena’s call comes through like clockwork later that evening and Kara grins, switching the stove off preemptively before turning to make her way to the couch. It’s been a long day. Not necessarily a bad one but one where she was not mentally present for the majority of it. Since Lena is no longer the owner of Catco, Kara has lost certain privileges and she is well and truly aware of them now.
She sinks down into the couch cushions. “This is Kara Danvers speaking, how may I direct your call?”
“Oh, shut up.”
Kara’s smirk is quickly wiped from her face at the low, gaspy tone of Lena’s voice. “Right down to business, huh?”
“I’m not going to lie, I’m— I’m bringing you in during the final moments,” Lena pants. “I just need to hear your voice. Say anything, I don’t care.”
“You were supposed to hold off.”
“No, you… ah, you told me I couldn’t come until you could hear me.”
God damn it, Lena really doesn’t miss a beat. Even if she is technically correct, toeing the line of insubordination sends a heavy thrill through Kara’s body. She twists to lie down. “And if I told you to stop right now?”
Lena’s breath catches in her throat. “You wouldn’t.”
Kara absolutely would. In this instance, she decides not to. “If I wasn’t so hard up, believe me I would.”
“Lucky for me.”
“What have you been thinking about?”
“That fucking voicemail. Everything you say to me… How—how badly I want it. It’s all I’ve been able to think about.”
“Me too,” Kara confesses.
“Even when I want to, I can’t stop thinking about you. What I want to do to you.” Lena gasps and whines, breaths coming out in heavy pants. “Jesus Christ, the things I want you to do to me…”
Heat pools low in Kara’s belly. “How many fingers are you using?”
“None, I—I don’t want them tonight. I tried and they don’t… I don’t want mine, I want…” Lena groans. “You know what I want.”
“You want mine.”
“Yes.”
“I wish I was there to taste you, Lena. To feel how hot and wet you are for me.”
“It’s borderline pathetic.”
“If you could see how quickly my body reacts to hearing you say that, you wouldn’t think so,” Kara counters. “If you knew how badly I want to be on you, inside of you. If you knew that these calls and being able to hear you has made it so that fucking myself barely takes the edge off anymore. That’s what you do to me.” Hearing Lena’s shallow breaths, Kara licks at her lips. “I know you could call it tacky but I can’t stop thinking about marking you, your neck, and fuck, Lena. I want it.”
“God, what have you done to me?” Lena whines. Her breath comes out longer and faster, clipped when she groans low in her throat. “I’m— I’m so close.”
“Don’t stop,” Kara encourages. “Let me hear you come for me.” Kara murmurs encouragement until she hears the beautiful, blessed sound of Lena’s orgasm hit, and then the aftershocks.
Once recovered, Lena clears her throat, makes a sound like she’s shifting around. “Thank you. That was…" she sighs, "just what I needed."
If Kara was attracted to Lena’s voice before, knowing how it sounds post-orgasm sets her body alight with a deep-rooted desire to touch her and never stop; to be the only person who gets to hear it and be the cause of it.
Kara’s fingers have already slipped below the waistband of her sweatpants and into thick, warm slick. Her eyes close. “My pleasure.”
“So, same time tomorrow?”
“Don’t you dare,” Kara laughs.
“I did wonder if you were touching yourself.”
“Wanted to wait. I was being considerate.”
“Is that right?”
Passing over her swollen clit, Kara moans quietly. “You know I do my best.”
“Your selflessness is much appreciated.”
That teasing tone is a new development over the past few days. Something that has been wholly absent in any context for so long that it almost, almost tricks Kara into thinking Lena will be able to forgive her someday. It tricks her into picturing lazy weekend mornings having fun, lazy sex in Lena’s bed. Makes her want it more than anything.
“When you can, I want you to touch yourself again. I want us to come together,” Kara says.
“And if I’m no longer in the mood?”
“Bullshit.” She hears Lena huff out a small laugh and it means everything .
“Pretty bold accusation.”
“Tell me I'm wrong. Tell me—” Kara moans low and quiet. “Tell me that if I ask you to touch yourself right now in exactly the same places I am... kind of like we're touching each other... that you'll do it, because the idea of telling you what to do and you—Rao— you doing it? It gets me-"
“Soaked. Me too.”
“Yeah?”
“Embarrassingly so.”
For a minute, Kara is so swept up in her own pleasure that hearing an echoing moan from Lena is almost surprising, though entirely welcome. Her entire being feels like it’s pulsing, on the cusp of pleasure she's only ever known with Lena. The laboured breath in her ear only spurs her on.
“Aren't you supposed to be telling me what to do?” Lena asks. “Not that I feel any need for direction.”
And God, she was. Kara has so many things she wants to say but…
“Lena, I’m so…” Kara groans.
“Me too.”
“I really don’t know if you do.”
“Tell me what you need,” Lena says.
It’s the low, raspy tone for Kara. Where she’s certain Lena means to help, she’s making it worse. Kara’s two fingers deep and so wet and yet it hasn’t even begun to take the edge off. She moves her hand faster, grinding where she can, twisting and curling her fingers, all while hearing Lena fuck herself on the other end of the line.
“Kara.”
Hearing her name spill from those lips sends a fresh pulse low through Kara’s body, her abdomen tightening as she rolls her hips. A long, low moan follows in its wake.
“Please.”
It’s the first time Lena has pleaded for anything and Kara’s heart thunders in response. She adds a third finger. “I need you.”
“I’m here.”
“No, you’re—you’re not. I need you with me,” Kara pants. “I need to be inside you. I need to touch you and feel you...taste you. Lena, please, I- I’m three fingers deep and it’s not helping… I need you. I need to have you.” Visualisation alone almost makes Kara growl. “Tell me you want it.”
“I wish it were that simple.”
“If it was?”
“If it was… I imagine I’d be screaming your name by now."”At that, Kara moans. “But for now… know that I’m soaked for you. Only you, Kara.”
“That makes it worse.”
“I’m trying to make it better.”
Kara laughs, short and breathless. She’s working her hand faster. “If you’re touching your clit, stop.
“What do you want me to do?”
“If you were here? I’d be guiding you up until your thighs were either side of my face. Tell me… stroke your thighs, slowly. Tell me how they feel.”
Lena hums. “They’re full and soft,” she begins. “Warm. Strong . And suddenly feeling under touched.”
Kara’s body tightens and her head presses deep into the pillow beneath it. She can practically feel Lena’s thighs framing her face and she’s close- so close. Her body must be punishing her because she doesn’t know how she hasn’t come yet. She’s been horny ever since she left that damn voicemail.
“All I want is your mouth on me,” Lena gasps. “You’ve no idea how much I fantasise about it. Sometimes you’re even holding us both in mid air while your head’s between my legs, seeing spots you make me come so hard.”
Lena fantasising about Kara is one thing. Hearing Lena fantasise about her powers is another. Before Kara knows it, her fingers are slipping over her clit quickly and messy, taking her higher and higher until she’s coming. The release is long and hard, and worth every second of effort. In the midst of her pleasure, she hears Lena follow not long after.
“God, Lena,” Kara sighs quietly as she’s coming down. She can hear her breathing but Lena doesn’t say anything and Kara takes her time recovering.
It’s like this sometimes lately. They’ll talk and tease and come , and then there’s a silence Kara isn’t always certain how to fill. She still doesn’t want to say the wrong thing. Then there are the times she doesn’t care to censor herself.
“I'd love to take you for coffee tomorrow.”
“Shouldn't you be taking people for coffee and then do this sort of thing?”
Kara smiles. “I’ve taken you on plenty of coffee dates, not to mention the lunch and dinner dates.”
“So you have,” Lena replies.
“Maybe you’ll be ready for a new one soon?”
“Perhaps.”
“I would like that.” Hope swells dangerously inside Kara’s chest and she tampers down any further comment on it for now. She’ll wait. After a moment she hears the whoosh of running water from Lena’s shower. “Is this your way of kicking me out?”
“Yes.”
Kara smiles at the cheeky tone. “Oh, loud and clear. Damn.”
“Enjoy your evening, Kara.”
She already has.
Despite ending their conversation shortly after and staying on good terms, it ends up being their last call for a number of days. Almost a week. While sometimes their schedules do genuinely clash, this feels different. Concerning. Kara thinks that perhaps she shouldn’t have brought up going for coffee in her post-orgasm bliss. It always makes her soft, certain she would agree to any request Lena had of her, no matter how big or small, and has to remind herself that things are probably quite different from Lena’s point of view now.
It also opens her eyes to the changes in their relationship, both great and small, new and old.
She wonders if it will be any different when they’re finally in the same room again. Wonders how different their dynamic will feel. Kara wonders how she’s going to feel the next time she looks Lena in the eyes. The anticipation flutters inside her stomach.
Kara hasn’t talked to Alex about any of this. It’s unlike her and she knows it’ll probably hurt her sister but everything that’s been going on with Lena is still so new and exciting and uncertain she wants to enjoy it for as long as possible. Alex means accountability and Kara isn’t sure she can handle a barrage of questions, as understandable as they may be. While Alex’s loyalty to Lena over the years has been sporadic, Kara knows that when it comes to her it is unbreakable. She’ll tell Alex when the time is right.
Several more days pass quietly until her phone rings unexpectedly around dawn.
Disturbed from sleep, Kara accepts the call and inhales sharply. “‘M’on my way.”
“And where exactly are you running off to, half asleep?”
Lena. Kara’s smile is lazy. “Anywhere you want.”
“That’s a dangerous offer,” Lena says quietly.
“Are you okay?”
“Yes, I’m— I’m alright. I just… I’ve had some trouble sleeping since the last time we talked.”
“You should have called me,” Kara chastises.
“It’s the main reason I didn’t.”
“What?”
“I’m sorry, I know it’s early for you. But I need to say this in case you think this past week or so has anything to do with you saying or doing something wrong because, I assure you, that’s not the case. Despite everything that’s happened, you’re owed an explanation for the lack of communication and here it is: I’m taking advantage of you. And the realisation… hurt me. Has haunted me.”
“Lena, that’s not true.”
“It is true. And it’s why I think we should continue this break of sorts. Just for a little while.”
Kara sits up in bed and leans forward, elbow on her thigh. Her eyes close for a moment. “What’s going on?”
“I can’t keep taking from you when I can’t even agree to a cup of coffee,” Lena says. “It isn’t fair and it isn’t right. I might have been… God, furious with myself after that first phone call, even with you, but you don’t deserve this.”
“Forget about the coffee.”
“Why should I? Why should you? It’s a reasonable request, Kara. One that I still can’t commit to fulfilling despite the things we’ve said to each other.”
“Okay, so … that still doesn’t mean it’s one-sided. We’ve been helping each other.”
“Yes, we have,” Lena agrees. “But these calls, Kara, they’re…”
“They’re enough. They’re more than enough.”
“You don’t believe that.”
“Yes, I do.”
“You don’t, and I’m not certain I do either anymore,” Lena confesses. “But if I can’t do coffee then I certainly don’t deserve to have you in any type of intimate activity, even if it’s just over the phone. Can you understand that?”
Kara’s mouth twists unconsciously, searching for the appropriate words to win Lena over, but reality slips over her like a cloud. She knows there’s no point arguing. If Lena didn’t mean it, she wouldn’t have said it. When her mind is made up, there’s usually little anybody can do to change it. On some rational level she won’t accept yet, Kara knows Lena is speaking some truth.
“I mean, I did have making up to do…”
“Which you have done. In spades.”
Unsure of whether or not she’s ready to handle the answer, Kara asks anyway. “So, where do we go from here?”
“It’s my turn to take the next step, so continue to be patient? I realise how dismissive that may sound to you but know that I’ll be working towards meeting you halfway.”
“Okay.”
“And know that you can check in with me and talk to me about anything as long as it stays—”
“Neutral?”
“Neutral,” Lena echoes.
“You’ll check in, too?”
“I’ll do my best.”
It’s the most progress they’ve made in months and Kara is, thankfully, in a position now where she recognises it as such. Now that she’s heard Lena explain, it’s easier to relax rather than get swept up in her initial knee-jerk reaction of dismissal. After all, isn’t that what partly got her into this mess in the first place? As grey as the circumstances were, if she’d been less selfish with Lena in the first place then they wouldn’t have to navigate the treacherous waters of betrayal and forgiveness now.
Time passes quickly enough over the next several weeks, busy enough with both jobs, her friends and keeping true to her word by checking in with Lena every now and then, which is far less than how much time Kara spends thinking about her. Missing her. Missing the way she sounds in her ear.
It’s difficult not to think about Lena when she touches herself. Kara doesn’t give herself a hard time over it. In fact, she might consider something wrong with herself if she didn’t refer to the many maddening ways Lena had reduced her to a useless, trembling mess on the nights where she just needs a quick, satisfying orgasm in order to fall asleep. She comes harder when she imagines Lena doing the same thing, sometimes even at the same time.
At some point during those weeks, Kara also divulges to Alex that she and Lena are exchanging text messages now. She doesn’t tell her any more than that, figuring that technically she isn’t omitting anything because she and Lena are only being friendly currently. Alex is happy for her, and Kara’s happy too.
Lena texts Kara during an investment meeting with an unflattering photograph of an older, miserable-looking gentleman with the caption: this clown had the gall to tell me to smile. How should I proceed?
Kara’s mouth curves upwards as she composes her reply. I mean, obviously you can never smile ever again.
An easy feat, considering my present company.
Wow…
Don’t be precious, Kara.
Kara sends back a silly emoji and she doesn’t need to be a fly on the wall to know Lena will be smiling too.
A few days later Kara sends Lena a selfie in front of a vending machine at CatCo, her mouth down turned beside a packet of M&Ms that are stuck undispensed. A reply comes through almost immediately.
Those arms must be good for something?
Kara’s next message is a photo of a third of the machine’s contents sitting at the bottom, along with the caption: sure are!
That’s more or less how they continue for the following weeks.
It’s Friday night and Kara is fully reclined on her couch with a half-empty bowl of popcorn resting on her abdomen. The weather has just begun to turn from late summer warmth to the first truly chilly evenings of fall and Kara enjoys shutting out the city for a few hours and settling in with several scented candles and a blanket as she immerses herself in a movie.
Her phone sounds an alert and she picks it up to see that Kelly has posted a new photo to social media. She doesn’t need to open it to know it’s going to be a staged ‘candid’ photo of Alex looking beautiful at whichever restaurant they decided on in the end. It’s only a matter of time before Alex will post a similar photo of Kelly. The next time her phone chimes is a moment later, this time a different tone. Illuminating her home screen shows her that she has a new message from Lena.
Big Friday night plans?
Kara wipes her hand on her blanket. Big night in! What about you? Should I expect to see your photo splashed across online blogs with my morning latte?
God, I hope not. How’s your company?
No company, just me.
No response comes and Kara goes back to her movie and popcorn. It’s a courtroom drama that she’s seen before but not for years and so everything is both new and vaguely familiar; enough to have to concentrate on the plot but not so much so that she can’t get up to refill her bowl when the need arises.
It’s when she’s heading back to the couch that the doorbell rings.
Opening the door to reveal, of all the people it could possibly be, Lena Luthor, throws Kara for more of a loop than she was expecting. Of all the ways she’s imagined this moment, a dumbstruck expression and forgetting how to speak English was not one of them.
Lena is doing her best to remain unaffected but consternation is written all over, from the slight pull of her brows to her straight posture and accelerated pulse. Kara can read her body language like a book and if she wasn’t mildly concerned that the rush of seeing Lena in person again was going to make her do something ridiculous like float , she would have berated herself for not picking up on Lena approaching her door in the first place.
Kara has to flex her toes into the floor to prevent herself from stepping forward and wrapping her arms around Lena’s shoulders. Instead, she looks at her in what could possibly be wonderment.
“Lena.”
Something in her tone must be pleasing because Lena releases a small breath and directs an honest to God smile her way. “Hi.”
“Hi.” Kara steps back in a wordless invitation, holding the door open widely until she’s safely inside. That’s when she notices the two takeout cups of coffee in Lena’s hands. She gasps lowly. “Is that what I think it is?”
Lena stands somewhere between the door and the island and holds out one of the cups. “Maybe.”
“Extra foam?”
“Of course,” Lena says with a quick arch to a brow.
It’s such a familiar sight but something about it makes Kara’s chest throb in response. She takes a step towards the living area the same time Lena moves towards the kitchen and Kara follows her easily and willingly, eyes never leaving her even when Lena catches her looking. Kara smiles fondly. “It’s good to see you.” She takes a moment to take Lena in, to process that she’s standing in her apartment of her own accord. “It is so good to see you.”
Lena takes a sip of coffee. “Thank you.”
“How are you?”
“I’m all right.”
Kara’s head tilts ever so slightly and her voice softens the way it only seems to around Lena. “Yeah?”
Lena’s eyes track over Kara with an inscrutable expression on her face and she licks her lips before saying, “You look well.”
“I’m good,” Kara confirms dumbly.
A moment passes, somewhat strained.
“You’re quieter than I thought you’d be,” Lena comments, receiving a bashful smile in response. “I’m sorry if I should have called first. I wasn’t sure I’d be able to go through with it and… well, I didn’t feel like adding another bullet point to the list of ways I’ve disappointed you lately, so.”
“This is good,” Kara protests gently. “I’m just— surprised. In a good way,” she hastens to add. “I don’t want to spook you.” She needs something to focus on besides staring . Coffee. Coffee is good. She sips at it gratefully. “So, ah, where should we start?”
While Kara may be unsure where to begin, Lena has no such trouble. “Before I say anything, it’s important to me that you know I’m doing my best to move forward with our… friendship. I’m seeing a therapist. Have been for a number of weeks now.”
Kara looks hopeful. “Really?”
“Yes.”
“How is it?”
“If I had to choose between a weekly root canal or therapy, I’d probably choose the root canal.” With a mouthful of coffee, all Kara does is incline her head. “It’s awful,” Lena shrugs. “But good, I think. Necessary. There’s a lot more to unpack than perhaps I realised.”
“I’m proud of you. I don’t know how much that means to you, but—”
“Thank you.”
“I’m glad you’re here,” Kara says. Frustratingly, the sentiment brings a frown to Lena’s face and Kara wishes she could take the words back, though she knows they’ve been clearly displayed on her face since the moment she opened the door.
Lena fiddles with her coffee cup, takes off the protective sleeve and draws a blunt nail over the join of the cardboard running up the length of the cup. She hesitates but looks Kara in the eyes. “I think a very small part of me still hates you,” she says quietly.
Kara doesn’t know what she’s supposed to say to that, if anything. She accepts it silently, though not without an uncomfortable pressure in her throat that she has to swallow to push down.
“That’s… that’s part of it. Part of a much broader spectrum of-of feelings of anger and betrayal and resentment, even self-worth, and how all of those have snowballed into a raging case of lust these past few months.” Lena swallows, looks into Kara’s eyes. “While I’ve undeniably moved forward, I want to forgive you completely. I want it to be as simple as wanting to, but it isn’t. I want you to talk and explain and make me understand but the truth is that I’m afraid that if I do that, you’ll still be disappointed when you discover that it won’t magically fix things right away. That you will be disappointed in me. I don’t want that.”
Kara has to stop herself from reaching out to touch Lena’s hand. “I’m so sorry I made you feel like that. Of course I know a few cups of coffee won’t fix everything. Please hear me when I say I would never expect that, or punish you for not reacting the way I want you to.”
“No?”
“No,” Kara says emphatically. “The frustration is never directed towards you, ever. I did this. I created this mess to begin with. Any frustration I feel is on me.”
“It’s not totally on you. My past experience with betrayal has greatly affected how much the Supergirl reveal hurt me; influences my reaction to even the slightest hint of it.”
“That’s not your fault.”
“No,” Lena concedes. “But it is a factor. One I feel I should point out.”
“Thank you for coming here tonight. You know, I don’t… I don’t care how long it takes. You taking this step means a lot to me. Even if you can’t do it again for a while.”
“It’s been strange, hasn’t it? The radio silence.”
“Yeah.”
“It’s been a…” Lena sighs. “A long, stressful few weeks. To say the least.” Tension begins to rise and neither are blind to it. It’s thick in the air, impossible to ignore, and Kara’s eyes flit to Lena’s mouth, unable to help herself. “I'm not here to have sex.”
“Okay,” Kara accepts.
“I may not be ready to have sex with you, but I… I know we both want more than what we’ve been doing."
Kara can only nod dumbly.
“And I feel it’s only right that, just this once, it is me alone who is vulnerable. I’d like to give that to you. So, unless you have any objections, you’re going to go over to the bed or the couch —wherever you’d prefer, and lean back. I’m going to sit in front, press back into you, and touch myself with your direction in my ear."
Kara feels like most of the oxygen gets sucked out of the room with that statement. “Uh…” At Lena’s arched brow, Kara adds, “A-are you sure? Please don’t feel like you have to. You don’t owe me that.”
“I’m sure.”
“This is what you want?”
“This is what I want.”
God, Kara wants her so much but she has to ask: “I want this, Lena, I do. But are you sure it’s a good idea?”
“I’m sure that I’ve wanted this every day since we stopped, and thinking about doing it with you has been the only thing to get me through this shit storm of a week. But this is only going to happen if you want it, too.”
Kara wonders, briefly, if she’s fallen asleep during the movie and this is part of a dream. But it can’t be because even her imagination doesn’t do Lena the justice she deserves.
While there are dozens of places Kara wants her, there’s no other option than her bed right now. Her hand is unsteady as she takes a sip of coffee as if it is some sort of liquid courage. As Lena sheds her coat and reveals a thin, curve-hugging sweater beneath it, Kara downs the rest of her cup.
“Bedroom,” Kara says, stepping closer to her. It’s the closest she’s been to Lena in a long time and swallows when Lena steps out of her heeled boots and drops several inches shorter while looking up into her eyes. Something about it goes straight to her head and everything begins to slow down. “Can I carry you?”
“My legs still work. Do yours?”
Kara catches the small smile and returns it stupidly. “Not sure.”
“Well,” Lena begins coyly, “all you have to do tonight is open them.”
She’s halfway to the bedroom before Kara catches up.
Settled in the middle of the bed, Kara watches on as Lena sheds her black slacks and then crosses her arms to pull the sweater over her head, subtle muscles flexing as she does so. The expanse of creamy skin revealed for her eyes only, coupled with a matching set of royal blue underwear, has Kara wanting to shed her own clothes. Lena’s sharp eyes fixed upon her roots Kara to the bed for a moment, still and powerless to do anything but follow every movement. While Lena kneels on the foot of the bed and crawls up towards her, Kara wonders how she’s supposed to get through this without coming.
Lena gently pushes Kara’s legs open and Kara moves towards her, drawn to Lena’s mouth. At the last moment, her kiss is evaded.
“Don’t kiss me,” Lena requests gently. “Not on the mouth.”
She smells so good , Kara thinks as Lena settles herself between Kara’s legs. A perfume that is warm and spicy mixed with the lingering pleasing scent of fabric softener and whatever hair products Lena’s used recently. Lena’s accelerated heartbeat is all around her and it makes Kara want to wrap her arms around her, tell her it’s okay.
“Y’okay?”
“You’re soft.” Lena adjusts her shoulder. “I’ve wondered if you’d feel like marble.”
Kara smiles, bemused but pleased nonetheless. “We’ve hugged, like, so many times.”
“Not like this.”
“No…” Kara’s hand inches down her own leg, comes to rest right beside Lena’s. The body warmth bleeding into hers is nice. “Not like this.” She can’t help turning her head, nose pressing against dark, soft hair that is blessedly hanging down free, and tightening her legs ever so slightly to truly feel the woman between them. “You feel nice.”
If that feels good, then Lena taking Kara’s hand in her own and placing it on a bare, smooth thigh feels indescribable. Kara begins by simply dragging her hand over a large expanse of skin, up and down, fingers closed and then splayed, until she wants more and angles her hand inside and begins to massage the inside of Lena’s thigh. The delectable fullness of it makes her mouth water, makes her want to crawl down the bed and bite .
Emboldened, Kara brings her left hand around and matches the motion with Lena’s other leg.
“How do they measure up?” Lena asks after some time, her voice beginning to sound affected.
Kara smiles, leans the side of her face against Lena’s head. “Can’t believe you’ve kept these from me.” Her hands continue to work in slow, practised movements while she marvels over how soft Lena is. She doesn’t say anything more until Lena sighs softly, head tipping back against her. “Let me take your bra off.”
Lena sits up obediently, allowing Kara to unclasp it from the back. She holds the material against her chest. “There are three places you can’t touch. I don’t need to tell you, do I?”
“Kryptonians are nothing if not respectful, Lena.”
“I'm not exactly sure I want respectful tonight.”
Kara breathes out a laugh. “Trust me.” To her delight, Lena leans back and tosses the bra somewhere over Kara’s head. “Touch them,” Kara instructs. “The way you do when it’s just us, late at night. Make me jealous.”
Lena doesn't have to try at all.
From the very first moment Lena's hands are full of her own breasts, Kara feels an intense yearning to feel their weight in her own hands, to drag her mouth and tongue over warm, supple skin and fasten her lips over hardened nipples with Lena's long fingers twisted in her hair. Next time, perhaps. For now, Kara focuses back on Lena’s thighs, both of them working their hands slowly, gradually heating Lena’s blood until she voices a needy demand.
“Kiss my neck. Use your tongue.”
It feels like perhaps the most intimate request Lena has had of her in the past months.
Kara lifts a hand to sweep the hair out of her way, wanting a clear path, and stares at the exposed skin hungrily. The way she’s imagined going to town on this neck… Kara does not waste a moment delaying what Lena wants and she herself has needed for months; her lips press a single slow kiss into warm skin, committing it to memory. The first touch of tongue and the way Lena sighs and softens against her is like discovering a new power: exciting, heady, and instantly wants to try it again.
It isn’t long until Kara is dragging heated, wet kisses over Lena’s neck, unable to understand how she has gone so many years without doing it. It feels criminal. Her penance can only mean continuing to do this for as long as Lena wants her to. She lowers her head to where Lena’s neck meets her shoulder and opens her mouth, scraping the skin with her teeth, and follows a line of muscle upwards with her tongue, then down, finishing it with a kiss.
Lena makes it clear to switch to the other side of her neck and they adjust positions enough for Kara to fulfill the request comfortably. Muscles contracting sporadically underneath her hands clue her in to Lena’s need to begin really touching herself but it’s not until Lena’s hips begin to move between her own legs that Kara has trouble not giving in. Kara abandons Lena’s thighs, using her hands to track down Lena’s arms until her hands are atop, joined, following every touch of her beautiful, heavy breasts as Lena’s head falls back against Kara, a low moan spilling from her lips.
A short time later, Lena deserts one of her breasts and the tips of her fingers push underneath her panties. Kara stops her there.
“Did I say touch yourself?”
“Tell me.”
Lena makes a frustrated sound when no such demand is uttered, hips moving subtly, and Kara has to exercise restraint not to do the same to relieve the pressure between her own legs but she can’t contain a moan. Their heads press together and she speaks low. “You know how long I’ve wanted to have you, wet and wanting between my legs like this?”
“No,” Lena breathes.
“So, so long, Lena.”
Lena abandons her other breast, Kara’s hand falling away as she reaches up to tangle her fingers in Kara’s hair. “Then what are you waiting for?”
“You know what,” Kara accuses, mouthing at her neck again.
“What— you want me to make a mess of your bed? God, keep that up and—”
“Nope. One little word.”
Lena dips the tips of two fingers into her mouth and soaks them with saliva, glides them around a nipple, and Kara wants nothing more than to twist her body and have Lena beneath her, to lower her head and suck it into her mouth. And if she can’t have that, well, neither can Lena. Kara holds Lena’s hand away from her body and feels her honest to God tremble.
“Say it.”
“Please,” Lena finally gasps. “It’s been weeks.”
Kara flattens Lena’s hand against her abdomen and moves it down , pushing underneath the last barrier of her underwear. Before Kara’s own retreats she can feel the heat between Lena’s legs, can hear how wet she is. She swears softly when Lena’s hips roll gently into her hand, seeking friction.
“That’s it,” she encourages. “All I want is for you to show me how you like it, but don’t rush. And don’t come without saying my name.”
Lena’s body tightens against Kara and she sighs, fingers moving in small circles. Kara watches long enough to wonder if she will be the one to make a mess of her bed. Arousal thunders through her veins, pulses at her cunt. When she can no longer stand it, she once again takes hold of Lena’s hand and pulls it up without protest to see undeniable proof of desire. Kara opens her mouth to fasten her lips around two long, wet fingers as Lena groans.
Once thoroughly cleaned, Lena’s hand all but shoots back between her legs, this time pushing inside of herself. Kara’s feet hook around her ankles to pull Lena’s legs open wider and she can’t resist canting her hips against the full, warm weight of Lena inside hers anymore. She can’t.
Lena sounds incredible over the phone but it has done all but nothing to prepare Kara for the exquisite way in which she sounds right there in her arms. If she got wet hearing her before…
“You sound so good.”
“It feels so good. God, Kara, you— you don’t know what you do to me. Having you here for this is—”
“The way you taste,” Kara continues, pressing a wet kiss to her neck. “The way you look right now.”
Lena alternates between fucking herself with her fingers and sweeping them around her clit in full, slick circles in a steady pattern of no pattern. Every time Kara wonders if this time is going to be it, Lena changes it up or stills her hand completely. She’d accuse Lena of edging if she hadn’t already told her to take her time. Kara hasn’t been so conflicted in a long time. She wants Lena to come so badly but she doesn’t exactly imagine Lena will stick around for long once she’s finished.
Not that it matters what she wants. This isn’t about her.
Lena gasps brokenly, body coiled tight against Kara’s front. This time she keeps going, her breaths turning quick and shallow.
“If you’re wondering,” Kara starts, nosing the shell of Lena’s ear. “I’ve never been this wet in my life.”
Lena switches hands for a moment, using her left hand to touch herself. Once suitably wet, she switches them back at once and reaches up. Kara takes it with a kiss first to Lena’s palm, then sucks her fingers clean.
“Kiss my neck,” Lena gasps. “Until I come. I need— use your tongue. I need it on me, anywhere."
She sets out to complete her task immediately and it's with the otherworldly sensation of Kara's mouth and undivided attention on her neck that sends Lena to a seemingly sudden, violent orgasm in Kara Danvers’ arms. Not for the first time recently, Kara isn’t so sure that it’s merely her powers that have her hyper aware of every sound and movement Lena makes as she comes. Lena’s pleasure stretches on and she touches herself through the aftershocks enough to extend it for several blissed seconds before finally sagging down and back against the warm body behind.
Kara waits for the sound of Lena’s heart slowing.
There was a time where she was concerned how she would look Lena in the eyes after fucking herself on the phone to her voice, but that turned out okay. Kara wonders if it would be the same if she were to have a spontaneous orgasm the second Lena moves between her legs. The tiniest amount of friction right now would surely…
She won’t, she won’t, she won’t.
Lena moans softly from the back of her throat, back arching gently as she cups herself above her underwear a final time. Kara knows Lena will be able to feel the pounding of her heart and the tremble of her hands that now rest atop her open thighs but she doesn’t care. It isn’t like she can help it at this point.
For a moment the only sound is their mingled breath.
Then Lena sits up and Kara follows, bracing her weight on either hand as she pushes to sit upright and keep her hips as far away from Lena as she can for the moment. The seam of her joggers press against her just so and she bites back the sound that threatens to escape. When Lena looks at her, the vulnerability makes her heart thump with more than arousal.
And then Lena’s eyes drift to Kara’s mouth like she wants and Kara can’t help but think that if she presses forward just a little that she will finally know how Lena’s mouth tastes. The torture of it is exquisite.
Before any other crazy ideas enter Kara’s head, Lena rises on shaky legs and reaches behind her for her bra that is draped over the headboard. It’s easily the most disheveled she’s ever seen the woman and a wave of deep affection surges through Kara. Not entirely conscious of the initial movement, Kara holds the side of Lena’s face, fingers splayed into her hair while her thumb strokes softly over soft, heated skin.
Lena’s eyes fall shut as if Kara’s singular delicate touch has never been closer to eradicating the walls she has constructed for as long as she can remember.
“Thank you,” Kara utters softly, finding a sense of comfort from the way Lena almost holds her hand against her face for a moment until she gently pulls it away.
“Thank you ,” Lena counters as she fastens her bra.
Kara watches her get dressed with a ghost of a smile at her lips, enjoying seeing Lena move around her bedroom and rake a hand through her hair several times, doing her best to add some lost volume back to it. “Perfect,” she comments. Lena’s returning look is dry.
“Please.”
Kara shrugs. “Honesty’s kinda my thing now.”
“Oh, is that right?”
Kara just looks at her sort of haughty and opens her mouth but Lena cuts her off.
“You understand that I can’t… stay, right?” Relief flashes across her face at the nod. “There’s no need to walk me to the door. Stay there and, well, take care of— anything that requires your immediate attention.”
Considering Lena just masturbated while seated between Kara’s legs, the bashful skirting around it is so charming that Kara feels herself blush. Once she’s alone in her apartment and she can hear Lena’s heartbeat getting further and further away, Kara finally pushes a hand between her legs and twists over onto her stomach.
Chapter Text
Al’s is buzzing. It’s loud and rowdy and the atmosphere is infectious. Kara and co, minus J’onn, have been there for a couple of hours toasting to the end of a work week and are currently making plans for a Halloween cookie decorating competition. It feels like a good decision at the time, especially as the winner gets the grand prize of a themed three-layered cake with the flavour combination of their choice.
Kara already knows what she wants.
While Alex and Kelly and Nia and Brainy turn serious, discussing decorative strategies with their unspoken baking partners, Kara’s eyes linger on her phone. She takes a sip of beer before picking it up.
Do you wanna have cookies with me next weekend?
Please tell me that isn’t a euphemism.
No, like actually eat cookies!
Thank God.
Is that a yes? Kara types hopefully.
Not yet.
Great. We also have to bake them… and decorate them. For fun.
Pace yourself.
“Who are you smiling at?”
Kara hears the question but it doesn’t register until her phone is being ripped from her hands unceremoniously. “Hey!”
Nia grins, victorious, then she looks at the screen. The dramatic gasp garners some attention from nearby patrons. “Lena?!” She looks over the table, eyes narrowing in accusation. “When were you going to tell me you and Lena are back together? Am I, like, the last to know or?”
Kelly holds her hands up and Brainy doesn’t care, judging by his neutral expression. Alex is the only one who looks vaguely sheepish.
“Sister confidentiality, Nal. Sorry.”
Nia’s lips purse. “I’ll allow it.” She angles her body further away from Kara and checks her call log. “Man, you guys are chatty Cathy’s, huh? Making up for lost time?”
Kara snatches her phone back, cheeks pink. “We’re not— my friendship with Lena is delicate , thank you. We don’t need meddling o-or pressure.”
“Excuse me, I am delicate,” Nia contests aggressively.
A realisation sparks joy across Kelly’s face and Kara thanks Rao for her. Out of all of them, Kelly is the one who would never let her down in an hour of need.
“That’s why you’ve been so happy lately! Your late-night girl talks.”
Thankfully, Kara is distracted from the desire to bury herself alive by the vibration of her phone. She doesn’t care who it is. In fact, if it’s a telemarketer, she’s going to stay on the line. Just as she slides off her stool for some much needed privacy, Lena’s name comes up on the caller ID.
“Hey, just a sec! One sec!” Kara makes her way through a dense crowd near the bar and leaves through the nearest exit. The music and noise dims to a dullness with the doors closed. “Hi.”
“That answers my question of if you’re home,” Lena says.
“Al’s with the gang. Everything okay?”
“Why are we baking cookies next weekend?”
“Full disclosure?”
“There’s full disclosure on baking?”
Kara’s grimace lingers. “I mean…”
“Kara.”
“It’s a group thing. Brainy and the girls… each pair bakes and decorates a batch of cookies, J’onn judges, and the winner gets a layered drip cake of their choice.” She blows out a breath. “It’s pretty high stakes.”
“I see,” Lena says.
“There’s no pressure. I just thought— I mean, you like cake, I like cake…”
“I do like to win.”
“That’s true,” Kara comments. “And cookies don’t take all that long to bake. Plus everyone will be on their best behaviour, I promise.”
Lena hums. Eventually, she takes a long breath through her nose. “Well, how can I say no?”
“Really?” Kara grins.
“I’ll be there,” Lena says, quiet but sure.
“That’s great.”
“Mm. Tell Kelly I look forward to our victory.”
“Hey!” Kara’s on a high now. A roll. She’s gotta shoot her shot. “Do you wanna dress up with me? We can go as Barry and Dee.”
“Who?”
“Y’know, Barry Dalive and Dee Parted.”
Lena doesn’t respond right away and Kara wonders if she’s regretting every single one of their sexual interactions.
What comes out is a mostly strangled groan of exasperation. “Bye, Kara.”
“Wait, that’s a yes?” Kara asks frantically before she’s hung up on.
As it turns out, Lena stays true to her word.
There is no costume, not even a sticky label with Dee written on it, but she’s there and that’s all that matters.
And so the following weekend is spent, not without the absence of lingering tension, in Kara’s kitchen with people she once considered to be family. Kara picks up on it because of course she does , and everyone does their best to be friendly and polite, even Lena. It’s just something they have to work through and definitely discuss at a later date.
Kara stays close by always, and despite wanting to stomp her foot petulantly, she does no such thing when Lena actually follows through and reveals she and Kelly have already agreed to be each other’s partners for the competition. It appears she’s not the last to know but she does succumb to a fleeting pout.
Kelly’s arm drapes over Lena’s shoulder casually. “You’re all prepared to be destroyed, right?”
Disgruntled, Alex looks to Kara. “Guess I’m with you.”
If Kara notices Lena’s amusement at her look of utter indignation, she doesn’t say anything.
Halfway through the decorating process, piping bag poised in her hand, Nia glances up in concern. “There’s nothing off-limits, right? Like, we’re supposed to be going to hell for these cookies?”
Alex breaks her attention away from her and Kara’s creations, face red and vaguely sweaty in concentration. “This is about fun , Nal. Don’t be decorating dead babies.”
Nia bursts into guilty laughter. “Dude, I wasn’t!”
“Whatever,” Alex snaps lightly, noticing Kara more interested in what Kelly and Lena are doing. “Kara, c’mon. Eyes on the prize.”
Kara knows they’ve already lost.
Halfway through the work week at around eleven AM, Nia pulls over a chair and joins Kara at her desk with two paper plates and plastic forks.
Kara perks up immediately from her late-morning slump. “There’s food?”
“Cake,” Nia corrects, depositing two large slices onto the plates from a container. “Kelly and Lena received their winnings this fine morning; decided to share with everyone. I’m not gonna lie, I think it was premeditated? But God if I don’t need pick-me-up right now.”
Kara savours every bite and the company, having enough grace to wait until Nia has left for her own workspace to pick up her phone.
You always know just what I need.
I have no idea what you’re talking about.
You think you’re so slick…
I’m not?
She’s got Kara there. Boundaries are there to be respected, Lena.
Hmm.
I would open more than my mouth for cake that good. That’s all I’m gonna say.
I’ll be sure to pass that along to Kelly.
BYE.
You’re welcome, Kara.
It’s a cold, drizzling Thursday evening the next time Kara hears from her.
Lena only texts to ask if it’s a good time to call, and then Kara uses super speed to get dry and dressed after a shower. It’s an invitation. One that has been so rare for the past six months that Kara has feared it would never be extended again.
They meet by the park.
Kara spots Lena first, standing beneath a streetlamp’s ray holding an umbrella and two takeout cups of coffee, one on top of the other. Her cheeks are flushed gently with the chill of the wind and she gazes expectantly amongst the crowd of people approaching. Kara wonders if it’s anticipation she can see on her face or just wishful thinking. There isn’t time to decipher when, as if by sense alone, Lena’s gaze tracks until it finds Kara.
A smile is mirrored.
“For you,” Lena greets, extending a coffee Kara’s way.
“Technically it was my turn to buy the coffee.”
“Technically I don’t care?”
Kara rolls her eyes through a reluctant smile and they fall into line, taking a slow walk into the park. It’s quieter than the streets, feels more private. A little more like it’s just the two of them. That, Kara knows, is wishful thinking.
“How’s your week been?”
“It’s looking up. Spent, like, twenty minutes of my lunch break today petting a pregnant dog.”
Lena’s brow arches. “How can I compete?”
“No, don’t worry, it’s like: dogs, coffee, you,” Kara says, gesturing tiers with her free hand. “Just don’t throw actual puppies into the mix.”
“I wouldn’t want to rock the boat.”
“And yours?”
“Oh, you know.”
“Tell me,” Kara prods gently.
“There isn’t much to tell,” Lena breathes. “Nothing that will come as a surprise. The pressure that comes with work is… sometimes a little hard to breathe through, that’s all. I wanted to spend at least part of my evening actually outside of a building.” The gentle drizzle landing on her umbrella begins to sound harder and she glances up, adjusts her arm so that both she and Kara are protected from the onslaught. “And you know fall is my favourite season. It would be a shame to waste an evening like this.”
Yes, Kara thinks. What a grave injustice it would be to waste an evening spent with Lena Luthor.
“I’m happy to join you. And you know, my favourite hotdog cart is this way.”
Lena smiles knowingly. “One of my favourite places to visit this time of year is Switzerland. There’s something about it that’s unlike any other place on earth for me. I realise National City park hardly holds a light, but it could be worse. We can pretend, right?”
Kara’s turned towards her and has one hand reaching out before she knows it. “Let me take you there.”
“While I appreciate the offer…”
“You don’t want to.”
“We’re not the only two people here,” Lena gently reminds her.
Kara’s mind quickly conjures up the nearest dark corner they could go to. It’s only several minutes away with Lena’s pace. She gets stuck on the mental image of having permission to carry her halfway across the world, of how Lena would hold on to her, bury her face in Kara’s neck to shield from the biting wind. An involuntary shiver passes through her at the same time a breeze lifts her hair.
Still stuck on a fantasy, Kara has no chance to recover when she’s struck dumb by Lena passing over the umbrella and stacking their cups together, using her free hands to unravel a soft, thick scarf from her own neck and secure it around Kara’s. The unexpected sweetness of it has her reeling.
“I don’t— I don’t want anything from you,” Lena says, taking back both her coffee and umbrella as her brows knit. “You don’t have to do something for me for me to want to be around you. You know that, right?”
Kara is quick to nod. “I know.”
“We’re past that.”
They spend the next couple of hours together, talking and walking, Kara having a light snack of six hotdogs and a third of Lena’s unwanted cheeseburger, and despite not discussing anything significant, it feels miraculous. In a way, it is.
As they make their way back to the penthouse, the backs of Lena’s fingers brush against Kara’s. The first time is written off as a happy accident but by the third, it feels intentional. It takes every bit of strength for Kara not to gently close her hand around Lena’s, to entwine their fingers in a wonderfully simple display of affection.
Kara manages to refrain, if only because she knows that when she leaves Lena at the entrance to her building an air of uncertainty will shroud them, leaving them both unsure how to leave things. And she’s right. Not twenty minutes later they are stood outside of Lena’s building.
Lena swallows and turns to Kara. “Tonight was… refreshing. And exactly what I needed. Thank you. I hope you weren’t too put out.”
“Not at all.” Kara goes for her most reassuring smile but second-guesses herself when she sees Lena struggle. “Really, Lena, I had a great—”
Lena hugs her.
Lena genuinely and willingly has her arms around her, and it feels like finally coming home. And as Kara’s arms fold effortlessly around Lena’s body in return, it feels a little bit like holding the sun.
She calls during the second hour of Kara trying to sleep.
“Hello?”
“Hi.”
“Are you okay?” Kara can’t help but ask.
“Yes, I’m— I suppose I’m a little too accustomed to hearing your voice before I sleep.”
“There are worse problems to have,” Kara grins. “Do you need me to help you?”
“I didn’t call for that, I just… wanted to hear your voice. To thank you again for spending the evening with me.”
“I mean, it was entirely my pleasure.”
“That’s not factually correct.”
“Oh, no?”
“Not at all.”
“Lena, are you admitting to enjoying my company?”
“Yes, I am.”
“I think that’s the naughtiest thing you’ve ever said to me.”
Lena’s laugh is sudden and melodious. “Don’t ruin it.”
“Night, Lena.”
“Goodnight, Kara.”
The next time it happens, it’s planned. Lena calls to tell her of the pregnant dog that she spotted during her day and that it must have been the same dog Kara saw. Kara’s argument that National City is likely to have more than one litter of puppies due at any given time but it falls on deaf ears and if she’s honest with herself, the only reason to challenge Lena is to have the excuse to keep her on the line a little longer.
The gift of being back in Lena’s life is still a little surreal. On the other hand, it feels perfectly natural. As if she never left.
The next thing Lena comes out with strays so far from their topic that Kara half wonders if it’s the real reason for her calling, and not a spur of the moment invitation.
“How do you feel about joining me for an evening?”
Kara swaps the phone to her other ear, mindful not to scream out a resounding yes to what is really being asked of her. “I feel pretty good about it.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah,” Kara agrees easily. “Yes, absolutely. Tell me when and where.”
“Great.” Lena exhales as if there was a chance of Kara declining the offer. “Tonight, my place?”
“Your place?”
“Yes, I— it would be nice to see you there again. It’s been a long time. Whenever you’re free works. I can wait.”
That’s how Kara finds herself touching down on Lena’s balcony several hours later, knees bending gently. With a blanket of darkness across the sky, Lena doesn’t spot her right away and she takes the freedom afforded to her gratefully, to observe for a moment. To quell the unexpected surge of nerves fluttering around inside. Lena’s brewing tea, face still in concentration.
The Luthor name may be synonymous with cold and evil, but all Kara feels when she looks at Lena are polar opposites. And when Lena lifts her head and spots her visitor, slowly but surely lighting up at the sight, Kara feels an odd sensation, almost like flying without her feet having left the ground.
“Are you coming in?”
Kara takes a giant, sweeping step forward and moves to the doorway. “Can I?”
“The door is open for your grand entrance.”
Upon moving forward, Kara lurches back as if she’s hit a forcefield. She tries again to no avail. “Agh.”
“You may come in.” Lena smirks at her antics. “Grace me with your presence, please. There are treats.”
Kara whistles lowly as she steps inside and closes the door. “Treats too ?”
“I know, you’re dangerously close to getting spoiled.”
“That’s not actually possible.”
Affection dances in Lena’s eyes the closer Kara gets. She looks down to pick up a tray of tea by each handle. “I thought we could watch a movie?”
“Yeah,” Kara agrees, effortlessly taking the tray with one hand. “I’d love that.”
Despite the movie being one neither of them have seen before it ends up being abandoned just under an hour into it. The doors being left open for Kara’s grand entrance let the heat out and so they end up sitting side by side while Lena waits for the place to warm back up. The tea helps. Kara eats most of the fruit and considers pouring tea directly from the pot into her open mouth to distract her from having Lena’s body so close.
“Would you like some wine?”
Kara turns to find Lena’s face closer than she expected. “Yes,” she answers swiftly, lacking any trace of hesitation. Wine would not only be nice, but a necessity at this point. She doesn’t understand the private smile Lena walks away with.
“Red or white?”
“Surprise me,” Kara says as Lena sets about her task. It’s warming up but she still stretches across the couch to pull a folded blanket closer. Shaking it out surrounds Kara with a scent she associates with Lena and only Lena. It smells like her home and clothes; a scent that has grounded Kara for years.
“Are you allowed to be drinking and flying?”
Kara grins over at her. “Never met a wall I couldn’t fly through.”
“I’ll bet.”
“Nah, it won’t really do anything. I have to drink a certain type of alcohol to, y’know, get all loopy. Drinking human alcohol is more of a social thing.”
It isn’t long until Lena crosses back over with two glasses of red, folding one leg underneath as she sits back down. Her arms raise when Kara drapes a blanket over her lap. “So, it doesn’t affect you at all?” she asks, passing a glass over.
“I mean, I feel nice. Warm and kind of thrumming with energy.”
“Warm and horny with alcohol; sounds like a universal human experience, Supergirl.”
“I didn’t say horny.”
“But you meant it,” Lena challenges.
It isn’t like Kara can very well come back after that, but she can try to even the playing field. “Is that why you're plying us both with it?”
“You got me,” Lena smirks through a sip. “It’s the only way I know how to get you wet, after all.”
By the grace of God, Kara’s spray radius is relatively contained to the blanket she had the foresight to layer over her own lap as well. She coughs in fits and starts. “Are we really going there?”
As if suddenly remembering herself, Lena appears to back down. Still, her entertainment shines bright in her eyes. “Sorry,” she offers dryly, tipping a glug of her own wine into Kara’s glass to top it back up. Her head tips towards the TV. “Are you watching this?”
Kara’s still trying to mop up her mess. She shakes her head. It’s been difficult to concentrate.
“Do you mind if I turn it off?”
Another shake of her head as she discards the blanket to the floor. “Through no fault of my own, I think your blanket’s gonna be a casualty of your sense of humour. I’ll get it cleaned.”
“I’ll take care of it.”
“I mean, it was your fault.” Kara smiles at Lena’s roll of the eyes. She isn’t really sure what possesses her to say it, but the words come rolling off her tongue before she knows it. “So, um, are you still… seeing people?”
“I see lots of people every day.”
“You know what I mean,” Kara says.
“No.”
“No?”
“That’s what I said.”
Kara nods slowly. “Right.”
“I didn’t see the point,” Lena elaborates. “Not when they were doing nothing for me. It all just felt empty and performative, and honestly I spend so much of my time around inflated egos that I thought I might just go insane if I had to do it over dinner and drinks one more time. I don’t have the energy anymore.”
“ That’s why we stopped talking!”
“I think I know how to handle you by now.”
Their interactions the past few weeks have been largely innocent compared to the phone calls and Lena’s last visit to her apartment. Being here, toeing that line of flirtation, it feels dangerous. Kara isn’t sure whether to run to or from it.
“So, how many admirers are vying for your heart, Miss Danvers?”
“What?” Cheeks pink, Kara goes to push her glasses back up and touches skin before she remembers she isn’t wearing them. “Uh, none?”
“You mean to tell me there isn’t one person springing to mind, not even a co-worker?”
“Not a one.”
“Hmm.”
“What?”
“Nothing,” Lena brushes off.
“Your face says otherwise.”
Lena scrapes her teeth over her bottom lip for a moment. “I suppose I’m wondering if you would even notice.”
Kara’s lips part as she jabs a thumb towards her chest. “Uh, I have x-ray vision. Pretty sure I can tell when someone has intentions .”
Lena smirks. “I stand corrected.”
“Seriously.”
“Uh huh.”
“You believe me?”
Lena smiles blandly. “I believe that you believe it.”
“Oh, I hate that,” Kara grins.
“I’m just being honest. It’s something well-adjusted people in therapy practice, you see.”
“Then why are you doing it?”
Lena gasps and Kara’s stupidly happy expression is so contagious that she can’t help adopting it. “The audacity.” Kara’s legs cross towards Lena, a placating hand on her forearm. “She’s brave, she’s brave.”
“I’m kidding, I swear.”
“Yeah, you know where the door is.”
Kara chuckles and settles back down, turning more towards Lena this time and sinking a little further down. “How is therapy? Like, honestly. How are you doing?”
“Better than I was,” Lena says. “Undeniably. Don’t misunderstand, it isn’t something I enjoy .”
“No but… it helps, right? It’s helping, so you put in the work.”
“Yes.” Lena mirrors her position. “It’s also been illuminating. I never realised just how many lies I tell, though most of them are admittedly to myself.”
Readily offered honesty is apparently the theme of the evening. “Yeah?”
“Mmm.”
“Do you want to share any with me?”
“God, that’s tempting.”
Perhaps not entirely.
Kara laughs into her glass and takes a good sip. “Hey, c’mon, you tell me yours, I’ll tell you mine.”
“Now that is tempting. Please don’t tell me you’re also running around as The Flash.”
“I wish! I’d love to be that fast.”
“You do alright.”
Kara smiles but the cocky, lighthearted response dies on her tongue. Her features smoothen out. She hesitates on her brutal honesty until Lena says, “Please don’t lie to me.”
“That you’re mine when you’re with me. That’s— that’s my lie,” Kara confesses. Lena’s accelerated pulse is the only audible reaction she receives and Kara decides to jump back in. “Also… that I’m the best player at game nights.”
“Well, that’s not a lie, it’s an indisputable fact,” Lena says, recovering like a pro before Kara knocks her foot against Lena’s.
“As long as I have you by my side.”
“We do make a good team.”
“The best. Remember that during our next competition and you think about pairing with anyone but me.”
Lena looks down to Kara’s mouth and up again. “You looked happy when we were all baking.”
“I was.”
Lena smiles. “You look stupidly happy tonight, too.”
“I am.”
“Stupid?”
Kara’s mouth curves into a reluctant smile but everything feels slow and heavy all of a sudden. She reaches up, tucking an escaped lock of hair behind Lena’s ear. “Happy.”
The air between them is thick with intention and the space between their bodies has been minimal all night; a byproduct of an unconscious need to be close more than a convenient excuse of a chilly room, and more than ever Kara is aware of it. The warm fragrance emanating from Lena’s body heat and the way her face has stilled between glances to Kara’s eyes and mouth is almost too much. So as not to shatter the glass in hand, Kara’s free one falls away from Lena’s face and leans to the side, stretching an arm to place her remaining wine onto the glass coffee table with a small clink.
The brief separation of their bodies does nothing to ease the tension and Kara idly wonders if she, as a Kryptonian, is experiencing heart palpitations.
Unable to help herself from looking, Kara looks to Lena’s lips.
They look soft, pillowy, and delicious.
And dangerous. So dangerous.
She moistens her lips and wonders how to break the bubble they’re in. Wonders if she even truly wants to. While she’s debating, Lena lifts her hips and makes a slow, calculated move closer.
God, she’s so close that all Kara has to do is lean forward a little and—
In the end, it’s Lena.
It had to be Lena.
A simple soft, tentative press of her mouth at first, but it’s everything .
Kara’s eyes open to find Lena looking right at her. Before she can open her mouth to form words, Lena leans back in, the pads of her fingers against Kara’s cheek as she kisses her a second time, longer and firmer. There’s a moment of acclamation until Kara is an active participant and her hand is on the curve of Lena’s hip, needing it as an anchor the second those lips —as pillowy and delicious as they look— part against hers. The velvety sensation of Lena’s tongue is fleeting; almost a tease, and Kara is hooked immediately.
Their kisses are long and soft and they turn so full and deep that Kara can’t suppress a soft moan, Lena’s arm curled around her neck to hold her in place.
As if there’s anywhere else she wants to be.
Lena presses tighter against Kara, almost straining to get closer.
The repeated pressure of a glass against various parts of her head and hair vaguely register to Kara, though anything short of a natural disaster could happen at her back right now and she wouldn’t know anything but Lena and the taste of her mouth. The only reason she registers the glass is because Lena pulls away to place it on the closest surface—the floor— and leaves Kara a panting, dumb mess.
Lena fixes her eyes back on Kara and she’s wearing a look Kara’s never seen before and is unlikely to ever forget. Unadulterated desire. And it’s all for her.
Lena must have discarded the glass in favour of being able to thread her fingers through Kara’s hair because that’s exactly what she does, twisting her hips around so that her legs are draped sideways over Kara’s lap. Kara enjoys the sensation and follows the pull of Lena’s hands as much as the pull towards her mouth.
Lena’s lips are soft and pliant under Kara’s, each kiss seamlessly rolling into another and another until Lena moans softly right into her mouth. The sound of it ignites something dormant within Kara that she wasn’t sure existed before Lena; the need to devour, almost. Her hands roam up Lena’s side and back down, over the curve of her hip and down a shapely thigh as she kisses her.
Their mouths part wetly and Kara kisses the sharp angle of Lena’s jaw first, nudging her way to her neck until it’s buried there and she’s searing hot, messy kisses into the soft skin there.
Just when Kara thinks she can’t live another moment of her life without knowing how Lena Luthor feels beneath her, Lena has both hands at Kara’s shoulders, gently but firmly holding her back.
“Kara, wait.”
Lena looking as wrecked as Kara feels is the only consolation to stopping.
“Sorry,” Kara says reflexly. Her whole body feels alight, coiled, and she has to look down away from Lena, from the way she’s looking at her. It’s too much. There’s a ghost of a kiss against her forehead that’s almost tender.
“No, don’t be sorry. It was me, I… I couldn’t help myself.”
Kara isn’t sure what the perfect response should be, but asking Lena if she wants her to leave feels like the right one.
“No,” Lena dismisses at once.
The little crinkle of displeasure to her eyebrows accompanied with the puffiness of her lips is an endearing contrast, and Kara imagines a reality where she would feel free to lean forward for another kiss. In this one, she leans backwards, making the space between them greater.
Lena sighs and runs a hand through her hair as soon as she’s sitting upright again, eyes closing briefly.
“What are you thinking?” Kara asks gently. Lena looks at her, hesitating for only a moment.
“I’m thinking that you could have stopped this a long time ago, rejected me the first time I called, but you didn’t. And more often lately I find myself wondering why. So, why? What do you want from this, Kara?”
“I want what you want.” The truth comes out effortlessly but Lena frowns, swallows heavily.
“That isn’t an answer I feel comfortable accepting, and neither should you, not ever. Not for anyone.”
“Okay, rephrase: I want what you’re too afraid to ask for.”
“And what is that?”
“You know what.”
They’re teetering so close to absolute truth now that Lena is up off the couch while Kara remains seated. “You think everything is so simple…”
“Actually, I don’t.”
“No?”
“No. But this? Lena, this is something good . I knew from the moment we met that we were supposed to be together. For the longest time I told myself that meant as friends but it’s not. It can’t be. I feel things with you that I didn’t know I could feel. Things I’ve never …”
Lena cuts her off. “But if we stop, you’ll move on. You’ll find someone else. Look at you.”
“I want you.”
“You would have no trouble. The line to even have dinner with you would surely—”
“Lena.”
“Do you think I could stand to lose you again?” Lena asks abruptly. “Do you think I could survive it?”
Any frustration Kara may have felt evaporates almost instantly. The moment Lena turns her back and begins to walk away, Kara’s on her feet following. “Lena, you’re never going to lose me.”
“You can’t know that,” Lena says, whirling around. “You don’t know that.”
“When I see the future, you’re there. By my side.”
“As friends?”
“No! I mean, yeah, of course, always. But I see you in technicolour, in all the ways I’ve ever dreamed I’d find someone. As mine; not just for me but meant for me. My perfect fit.”
“You know me well enough by now to know that I am far from perfect, Kara.”
Lena’s rebuttal does nothing but solidify the resolve on Kara’s face. “And it hasn’t changed the way I feel about you. The question is: has it for you?”
Lena’s jaw sets with unsuppressable tears, overjoyed as ever to be gut-wrenchingly open and honest.
“The most frustrating thing is that I’m always with you, that despite breaking my heart I have been yours since the moment we met and honestly maybe even before then. But you’ve never noticed or made any clear indication that it was reciprocated, not until now, not until those phone calls.”
“Because the idea of you not wanting me in the same way made me feel physically sick. I couldn’t risk it. I didn’t know… I didn’t know I could have you like this. But now that I know, I don’t want anything else.” Kara looks at her desperately. “Don’t overcomplicate it. Please. Just tell me what you want. It can be that simple, I promise. What do you want?”
Lena’s mouth opens and closes a couple of times while Kara is right there, looking like the fate of the world depends on the answer. It can’t be fair. It isn’t fair. Not even remotely, she’s sure of it. But the longer she looks, the more Lena knows how glaringly obvious her answer has and always will be. She exhales in defeat and looks at Kara like she’ll die if she leaves.
The distance between them is closed with three long strides. Lena collides with Kara’s body, pressing solidly against her front with both hands at Kara’s neck while their lips meld together again and again. Kara kisses her so completely, with a level of patience that is most assuredly not mutual. Lena’s nails press into her skin and pull, and Kara kisses harder in return, hands curved around the swell of deliciously full hips as she tugs Lena’s more firmly against hers.
Lena’s mouth opens against Kara’s, kissing her so deeply, so filthy, and Kara’s hands tighten at her waist, and then skim lower. The motion of lifting Lena and having her legs lock around her own hips is seamless in execution and everything Kara thought it would be, but the soft vibration of Lena moaning into her mouth and the little puff of warm breath as her hips roll forward in desperate search of friction destroys her.
“Take me to bed.”
Kara doesn’t have to be told twice.
Lena’s bedroom is dark but warm and Kara hasn’t been in there a great amount over the course of their friendship but it’s enough to remember where everything is, to find the quickest route to the bed and brace a knee against it, one hand effortlessly holding Lena’s weight as they maneuver up the mattress with messy, uncoordinated kisses as they go.
Lena’s hands push between their bodies and she grabs fistfuls of her top, back in a gentle arch as Kara lifts up enough to help her remove it. Like a newly unwrapped gift, Kara’s mouth lowers to freshly exposed skin; first Lena’s neck and the dip of her collarbone, and then lower; her chest and the warm, soft swell of a breast. Kara’s hand glides up Lena’s torso and lands firm but gentle on the other, feeling its weight and a pebbled nipple over her bra.
Kara wants her bra off, now.
A moment away from asking and Lena arches up against her, then twists away.
Before Kara has the brain capacity to form human words, the room is bathed in a warm, low glow and she’s gifted with the sight of Lena smiling up at her as she unclips her front-fastening bra, exposing herself.
She’s so beautiful and sure and Kara’s mirroring a smile back in record time.
Once discarded, Kara surges down for a kiss.
It’s wet and hot, and though she could quite happily do nothing but kiss Lena like this for the rest of her life, Lena pushes on her head as Kara begins her descent, holding on until Kara’s mouth opens against a breast.
Kara is not ashamed to feast for the next few minutes.
Lena’s breasts are heavy and soft as a petal; the perfect size for her hands. She feels an already stiffened peak swell further under the velvety wetness of her tongue, Lena’s fingers tightening in her hair with a low groan. It’s everything Kara knew it would be. Alternating again, she closes her fingers around the other breast and guides it up, lining up perfectly with her mouth.
Lena moves against her, tugging impatiently at the blouse Kara finally decided on —royal blue and smart casual with her nicest and tightest black jeans felt like a good idea at the time. She needs it off the second she feels Lena’s fingers brush against her abs. Kara draws back, sitting on her haunches with Lena following wordlessly, grasping the blouse either side and tugging up past Kara’s raised arms. The bra is next to go, along with Kara’s soul when Lena’s lips fasten over a nipple and suck.
God, the amount of times Lena has fucked herself in this bed with Kara’s voice in her ear, spurring her on. The amount of times Lena has lay in this very spot, uttering dozens of fantasies that have resulted in devastating orgasms for both of them…
The rest of their clothes are shed soon after.
They come together completely, then. Skin to skin as they lose themselves in an endless cycle of deep, rich kisses and wandering hands.
Kara releases Lena’s tongue and mouths down her body, stopping only to lavish attention at her stomach before coming to a stop at the source of heat she’s felt acutely and intimately and can no longer resist. As full and shapely as Lena’s thighs look in a well-fitted dress or pair of pants, it does nothing to prepare Kara for the very real sight of them bare and spread beneath her, glistening with desire for her.
She feels like she should savour it, take her time.
As it stands, Kara shakes back some hair that’s fallen from her undoubtedly ruined updo and hookes her arms under Lena’s legs, opening her own hips as she settles against the bed. And then she lowers her head, taking Lena into her mouth, tasting her in the way she’s ached to for so long. She’s so wet and warm and vocally responsive that Kara moans against her. Her tongue moves through Lena’s slick heat, up, down, and finally circles a swollen clit before fastening her lips around it. It swells and pulses under her mouth, hardens with Lena’s low moan and grind of her hips against Kara’s face. The fresh wave of wetness has Kara grinding herself against the bed as she sets about cleaning up the mess she’s responsible for. Lena’s panting underneath her, muttering Kara’s name and a litany of curses.
It’s better than Kara had ever dared to dream.
She eats Lena out with a singular, unrushed focus. Kisses full, trembling thighs and fixes her mouth around Lena’s lips, savouring each texture and taste she can, enjoys the heady rush of power she feels whenever she has Lena’s clit in her mouth or under her tongue and those long fingers tighten in her hair with a feminine cry of her name.
Adjusting her position slightly, Kara lines up two fingers at Lena’s entrance and, with a needy plea spurring her on below, sinks them inside her cunt as deep as they’ll go. They both still momentarily, echoing moans as pleasure overcomes them.
Kara begins a rhythm and adjusts it to what Lena ends up being most responsive to, enjoying the swell of pride when Lena moans for her, because of her, when she rolls her hips up to meet each delicious spike of pleasure as Kara’s mouth finds Lena’s clit, fingers working tirelessly to build her up and up and up.
Lena’s heart hammers the longer Kara’s head is between her legs, working her body over so well, so thoroughly that it might as well be that nobody has ever touched her before this.
“God, Kara, you feel so fucking—” Lena moans, and her voice sounds so different than the past few weeks, so full of mindless desire that Kara knows she’s leaving a large wet stain on Lena’s bed but she doesn’t care. “God, so good.”
Her fingers slip out of Lena in favour of guiding her legs over her shoulder.
She needs Lena like this first; coming in her mouth and against her face. She can feel her tighten and spasm around her fingers next time, the second Lena’s recovered from the first orgasm. Kara leans back down with a soft mouth and even softer tongue, Lena’s legs a constant twitching mess as she works her over. The way Lena sounds approaching an orgasm is not a new sound to Kara. It’s one she’s heard dozens of times before, in her ear through a phone line and when Lena fucked herself to an orgasm in Kara’s bed, right between her legs. In her fantasies. She’s familiar with it in the way that it’ll never leave her mind as long as she lives.
Hearing it now, with her face blissfully buried in Lena’s pussy, it blows all of the other times out of the water. Kara grinds her own hips down to relieve some pressure and then it’s all but forgotten with Lena’s heels digging in her back, legs tightening as she rides Kara’s face.
She’s loud and Kara loves every second of it. Revels in it.
When Lena finally comes, she comes hard. It’s long and intense and Kara’s with her for every bit of ecstasy until her body goes soft and relaxes against the sheets.
Kara smiles when she’s cleaning her up and Lena’s slack thighs jump and twitch. She kisses each one and goes to wipe her face on the sheets before she makes her way back up the glorious body beneath her. A hand in her hair stops her.
“Let me.”
Having Lena kiss and lick her own come from Kara’s face all but short-circuits Kara’s brain.
Stretched out against each other, legs tangled, their trade of slow, deep kisses don’t give way to more than light touching and grinding for some time. Long enough for Kara to reach down and halt the progression of Lena’s hand between her legs and scrape her teeth over the slope of Lena’s jaw, then her shoulder.
“Let me fuck you from behind.”
Making Lena come becomes a new addiction. She doesn’t stop for hours, or allow Lena to touch her, just lets her catch her breath and then Kara’s on her again, telling Lena how good she looks, feels, sounds; how good she tastes. How beautiful she is. How badly she wants her.
Kara comes once, so wet and swollen that it was inevitable with a few presses of her hips helping to drive her fingers into Lena as hard as was being begged of her.
Still recovering from the latest orgasm, Kara beams at Lena’s panting form next to her, arm thrown across her eyes. There are red marks littered across her torso and Kara can’t wait to make a few more. She reaches out, running a hand over Lena’s stomach just because she wants to.
Lena’s grin is instantaneous. “I can’t possibly…”
“Not with that attitude.” Kara’s gifted with the sight of Lena’s eyes then and she’s so deliriously happy it’s unreal. “Want some water?”
“Mm, please.”
Padding through Lena’s home naked should feel strange the first time but it doesn’t. She goes straight for the refrigerator and opens it to reveal it fully stocked. The glass bottles of water arranged neatly on the top shelf are cold on Kara’s fingers and she’s distracted with that and the sight of a chocolate bar a couple of shelves down (what kind of heathen stores chocolate in the fridge?) that she’s startled when Lena’s warm body presses against her from behind.
Kara soon relaxes into the wonderful sensation of Lena’s mouth at her shoulder while she gently palms her breasts.
Lena stops when she hears Kara’s moan and Kara twists around, the cap already off the bottle. She watches her drink half of its contents, oblivious to Lena’s neck being on display now that her hair is tied back. In fact, Kara remains wholly unaware even after they’ve shared some water and Lena takes the empty bottle out of her hands, discards it onto a nearby surface.
Kara doesn’t even notice as Lena walks into her personal space and gently backs her closer to the counter, nor when Lena leans in, ghosting her mouth over Kara’s.
The penny finally drops when Lena, holding eye contact, lowers to her knees.
Kara is so utterly desperate for it that her cunt throbs and tightens at the sight alone. She makes an attempt to hold onto the counter in each hand only to find they’re both just out of reach of it. Leaning back isn’t comfortable and Lena’s mouth at her thighs makes Kara feel drunk, her lower abdomen tight and heavy. And then that same wonderful mouth is on her and Kara thinks keeping her away from the expensive fixtures was calculated because had they been in her hands, chunks of the counter would be piles of dust by now.
“Oh fuck, Lena.” She strokes Lena’s head for a moment, trusting herself for a moment , and then Lena kisses her wet and open, right over her clit, and Kara’s hands flinch away.
Lena peers up from between her legs, a no nonsense look on her face. “Put them back.”
Kara’s heart is still beating out of her chest. Her entire body has been engulfed in a light tremor from the moment Lena touched her. “No, I—”
“The only way this continues is with your hands in my hair,” Lena says gently, her thumbs moving in circles at Kara’s hips. “I trust you.”
Lena’s looking right into her eyes when she says it and Kara swallows a wave of emotion as her hands tentatively find purchase against Lena’s head.
It’s not even five minutes later when Kara is a gasping, moaning mess, out of her mind with lust and the otherworldly sensation of Lena’s mouth and tongue on her, inside of her. She doesn’t come suddenly. No, Kara feels every second of her orgasm build in her belly and thighs before it explodes to each nerve in her body. She comes rigid, her body shaking with the force of it and the effort to keep herself upright.
Lena moans at the way her hair is fisted in Kara’s hands; a tidbit Kara will tuck away for future reference.
She’s fucking wrecked , almost swaying on her feet until Lena looks up and smiles.
Then Kara is wrecked for an entirely different reason. Irrevocably.
Sleeping in an unfamiliar bed is what wakes Kara, hours later. The city sounds different so high up in the dead of night and she takes a moment to take it in, eyes closed. Her body feels good. Satisfied in a way she hasn’t felt in a long time. Lena’s heartbeat is steady beside her and Kara’s eyes open, wondering how light of a sleeper she is. Unused to sleeping beside someone, will turning over in bed disturb her? They fell asleep with the soft glow of light on and she really, really wants to see Lena’s face, if only to prove that this isn’t part of a dream.
Minutes pass until Kara discovers that no, turning over will not wake Lena.
Not when she’s already awake, lying on her back with an arm curled around her head. She looks comfortable and soft. So soft.
The small smile at Lena’s mouth destroys any burgeoning anxiety in Kara’s chest.
“Hi.”
“You’re awake,” Kara says.
“Mm. There was a strange, beautiful body in my bed.”
Kara gasps quietly. “You’re kidding.”
“I’m afraid not.”
“Want me to get rid of her?”
Lena smirks, one hand already smoothing across the sheets in search of Kara’s where they entwine loosely. “That’s the scarier part, I don’t.”
Kara searches Lena’s face, trying to gauge a sense of how she’s handling that new tidbit. “Are you okay?”
“Very much so.” Lena smiles and Kara feels her heart grow a few sizes. “I— deliciously sore, several strained muscles…”
“Sounds terrible.”
“I should be practically catatonic with the way you fucked me, but I’m oddly wired. Are you awake enough to take a shower with me?”
Kara’s laughter is breathy and surprised as Lena’s foot drags over her calf under the covers. “Oh, my God.”
“Is that a no?”
It most certainly was not.
An hour later, freshly showered and both sporting a leggings t-shirt combination, Lena is perched on Kara’s lap in the armchair as they share a cup of decaf coffee.
“You really didn’t notice my reaction to your dress that time we went to Morgan Edge’s party?”
“Oh no, that I remember. Vividly.”
“Or when you started wearing three-piece suits,” Kara grins, eyes glazing over for a second.
“So I had an idea you found me attractive,” Lena concedes. “I find lots of people attractive. It doesn’t mean I’d sleep with them or harbour feelings.”
“Just for me?” Kara knows that Lena ignores the exaggerated smug expression on her face as she takes the mug back but it’s too late, Kara’s mind is spinning. “Did you yearn?”
Lena laughs, mortified. “No.”
“I did.”
“Sorry to hear that,” she says blandly as Kara mouths at her neck. It’s comforting more than sexual but it feels good. Exciting yet safe. It has her thinking, recalling many sleepless nights lately and even tonight as Kara lay asleep beside her. “There were some upsides to it.”
“Hmm?”
“The lying,” Lena says. “All those times you ran off into danger, got hurt. When Reign nearly— I realise that part of it was a kindness. If I’d known, if I’d had even the smallest inclination that something was wrong and you were hurt, or worse, I’d— well. I’m not sure I know what I would have done.”
“It’s in the past,” Kara points out.
“I think there are a few things that would do well to stay there. You were honest when you said you were selfish and scared but also wanted to keep me safe. Right? They can all coexist. I’ve begun to see the grey in it. Understand the weight of that predicament and how it must have ravaged you at times. You made a mistake, a big one, but I don’t see why you should continue to pay for it. I don’t see how we can move forward if I stay stuck in the past. So, we’re moving on together, as equals. A team. As adults who share everything; good, bad, and truly ugly. All of it. And know it can never happen again. Ever, Kara.”
Kara’s arm tightens around Lena’s body, regarding her seriously. “I promise.”
“I’m sorry that I hurt you. I’m sorry I couldn’t just talk to you. My cold shoulder has a tendency to take on a lifeforce of its own.”
Kara kisses her shoulder this time. “It was a worthy opponent. And totally valid.” Lena settles more comfortably against her and twists her head for them to share a chaste kiss. “What about everybody else? I know it’s a little different.”
“It is,” Lena agrees.
“You and Alex especially… you should talk. If you want to. When you’re ready.”
“We should. At some point.”
Kara smiles earnestly. “It goes without saying that I don’t expect you to be ready to move forward overnight. I know it’s a process. Even knowing that you want to means a lot to me.”
“Yes, well…”
Kara kisses her cheek. “Thank you.”
Over a month of absolute stomach-turning bliss passes in a flash. Each of them are busy at work and with the giddy excitement of a new relationship. They don’t say the word girlfriends —Kara has the suspicion that Lena would roll her eyes and scoff if she asked if they were girlfriends— but she has times where she sees Lena from across a room or even a street, and a surge of pride swells up inside her chest because yes , Lena is most definitely her girlfriend. And she’s hers.
There’s only one game night. It’s without Lena and it ends in tears.
Admitting to Alex that she and Lena have been doing a little more than talking ends up being much more emotionally wrought than Kara anticipates and things are said in the heat of the moment that neither of them really mean, things that have Alex storming out of Kara’s apartment and Kara relieved she’s gone.
Until the morning, of course, when remorse sits heavy on her chest.
Instead of listening to music during her morning shower routine, Kara uses the bluetooth speaker to call Lena. If she wasn’t so twisted up over how she left things with Alex, she might notice the irony of calling Lena to vent and receive communication advice. Who would have thought?
Kara arrives at Noonan’s first. Her nerves have prevented her from ordering one of her favourite muffins and she occupies a table close to the door and large windows, leg shaking up and down as she scans for any sign of her sister. She’s so desperate to catch sight of her that she doesn’t even turn to look at a male who’s approached her table to ask if one of the other seats are taken, just responds in a distracted, almost dismissive tone that she’s waiting for someone.
Unaware she’s been spotted already Alex approaches slowly, face stern.
Alex can be difficult to read sometimes but regret is clear for Kara to decipher from her expression, and the anxiety that typically comes with their rare arguments.
Kara knocks into the table in the haste to get to her sister. Their arms wrap around each other tightly.
“Thanks for calling,” Alex says into Kara’s shoulder.
“Thanks for coming.” They hold on to each other for a little longer, finishing with a similar comforting rub of the back. Kara extends Alex’s coffee as they sit and navigate a much more neutral topic than they did last night. They talk about Kelly and how James called this morning to talk about plans for Christmas. When Kara moves on to commenting on the baked goods supplier at Noonan’s reducing the sugar content across the entire menu but most noticeably their sticky buns, Alex steps in.
“I’m sorry for reacting the way I did last night. I took it personally that you didn’t come to me sooner because hey, if anyone would have understood what you were going through, it was me, right? But I was wrong, and I’m sorry. Everybody’s journey is different and I had no right to make it about me.”
Somewhere in Alex’s apology their hands joined and Kara squeezes.
“Thank you, I appreciate that. It was just new, Alex. And really, really delicate. I didn’t keep it from you just for the sake of it. I needed Lena to know she could trust me again, that I wasn’t going anywhere and I would wait until she was ready. I always hate when people say this but it really did just happen. One day I realised the way that I feel about her — have for years, on some unconscious level, was more .”
“You sound pretty serious about her,” Alex says.
“I am.”
“And Lena, she’s… she feels the same?”
Kara’s face lights up at the mention of Lena and she can’t help but think of all the wonderful ways in which Lena has softened with her, the times Lena is downright silly with her. “There was yearning , Alex,” Kara says. “Years of it.”
“Gross.” Alex smiles and sips her coffee. “She’s good to you?”
“She is.”
“And being with her, it feels natural?”
“I know you don’t understand yet, but yes. God, yes.”
“I don’t have to, right? I just have to trust you. And I do, Kara. Always.”
Feeling lighter than ever, Kara twists around and fishes her phone out of her purse. She grasps it in both hands, setting them on the table. “Will you have coffee with us this morning? Lena had an errand closeby, so we sort of came together. She’s outside.”
Alex doesn’t attempt to hide her surprise but she does fight back a grimace while a hint of apprehension flashes across her face. “Sure.”
Kara levels her with a look.
“Okay! Jeez. Yes, your.... Lena can join us. Of course.”
“Yeah, don’t call her my girlfriend in front of her, she might have an aneurysm.”
“Kara, you just said she’s good to you. If you’ve told her how you feel and you’re sleeping together and spending all this time together, a label is not asking too much.”
“Okay, first: they’re called baby steps, and second: I don’t need a label from the second we start sleeping together to know how she feels about me, or how we feel about each other. Trust, right?”
Alex exhales in defeat and holds her hands up but the penny finally drops and so does her jaw. “Wait. You have a billionaire girlfriend just… waiting around for you?” Her head shakes and she can’t help a small laugh. “Damn, Danvers.”
Kara just beams.
“This was planned , you know. She knows you guys making up means everything to me.”
“You could have warned me,” Alex says as Kara goes about sending a text message. She would have brought Kelly.
The three of them having coffee together is not without an air of tension, but Alex and Lena both try their best. A busy, public location is hardly the ideal setting to air any grievances but, like all of them baking at Kara’s apartment, it aids in their civility and finding a common ground. They even share a grimaced laugh when Kara decides she can stomach something to eat and empties two sugar packets onto a sticky bun.
Kara’s hand rubs over Lena’s thigh under the table in a silent show of support when she hears Lena’s heart beating quicker than normal.
“So, I heard from Sam the other day,” Lena begins, seeing the moment Alex genuinely looks interested. “She and Ruby spent a few days in Colorado for their opening season weekend. Sam wanted to go early next year after some classes for a better experience but Ruby insisted after a classmate bragged about going last year, saying it had to be as soon as possible.”
Alex grins. “Aw man, poor Sam. How was it?”
“Ruby left the resort sporting a neon pink cast on her arm, while Sam tried her best not to choke on an I-told-you-so. All in all, I’d say it went as well as Sam expected,” Lena chuckles.
“Please tell me you have pictures.”
Of course there were photos. Alex’s laugh at Ruby’s sour expression is unreserved. “Poor Ruby.”
“Poor Sam ,” Kara counters. “Imagine the attitude.”
“Fair.” As luck would have it, Alex’s work phone begins to vibrate on the table and she sees a visible slacken of Lena’s shoulders. “I’m gonna have to take that, guys,” she says as Kara licks her lips and nods, wiping her sugary, sticky fingers on a napkin. “This was… not as totally awkward as I was expecting.”
Lena smiles. “Your honesty is appreciated and seconded.”
“Well, I had a great time,” Kara counters.
Alex slips her arms into her coat, eyes on Lena. “Is it cool if I call you? Maybe we can talk?”
“I’d like that,” Lena replies.
Kara rises to her feet and exchanges a hug and cheek kiss with Alex before she leaves. She spins back to face Lena with a big, dopey smile. Lena rolls her eyes.
“Stop it.”
“What?”
“Beaming. You’re blinding me.”
“I’ll just take my happiness elsewhere, then,” Kara declares, leaning in for a big kiss to Lena’s face. “I’m getting a latte to go; you want anything?”
There are only two people in the queue before her, and she waits patiently to place her single order when the man in front of her blindly steps back and onto her foot. He turns quickly, lips parting.
It’s William.
“I’m so sorry.”
Kara has to remember to act as if his weight actually hurt but she spares him from an exaggerated show. “Ah, don’t worry about it.”
“Seriously, if my clumsy arse has, like, broken your toes …”
“I’ll know who to send my medical bill to.”
William laughs. “Christ, I’ll be bankrupt. You Americans and your hospital bills.”
Kara humours him with a smile but it falls flat. She glances over his shoulder at the barista who has begun making her favourite seasonal latte after finishing the previous one. Kara points at the end of the counter where a single takeout cup is waiting.
“I think you’re up,” she says, moving down the line as others fall into the queue behind
“So I am,” he smiles, placing his hand low on her hip. “Sorry again, Kara. See you at the office? If you need an errand guy, just say the word, yeah? Or if I can buy you a coffee some time to clear the air.”
“I’ll be okay,” she laughs, and he leaves without her noticing. She does, however, spot a pointed arch to Lena’s brow when she returns to their table to ask if she’s ready to go.
“X-ray vision, huh?” Kara’s absolute ignorance is so endearing that Lena’s not even mad.
“What?”
Lena doesn’t respond to her but she does make a point to entwine their fingers as they walk to the car she’s called for. She doesn’t say anything in the car, or on the way up to her office. By then, Lena decides to put Kara out of her misery.
The door closes and it’s just the two of them.
“You said there was nobody at work who had feelings for you.”
“And there… isn’t.”
“And yet William was falling over himself while you were both getting coffee, was he not?”
“He was not. He stepped on my foot and thought he hurt me. I couldn’t exactly tell him that I barely felt it.”
Lena’s no nonsense expression present. “Kara, that man wants to have sex with you. Trust me. An unnecessary albeit brief touch to your waist, coupled with a later offer to share a drink together. Our table was closeby, it wasn’t a stretch to hear you.”
“Lena,” Kara whines.
“I’m not mad,” Lena promises, thoroughly amused by the whole thing. “I’m merely pointing out a perfect example of one of the reasons why it took us so long to get here.”
“Coffee can just be coffee.”
“We brought each other coffee.”
“And we’re totally friends!” Kara grins.
“Who are having sex while involved in a monogamous romantic relationship.”
“See? Best friends.”
Lena laughs like she hates herself for it. She concedes with an incline of her head. “Just know that I’ve never shared and never will.”
“You have literally no reason to be jealous.”
“I'm hardly jealous, Kara.”
“I mean, I get it. Everyone here looks at you like they want you to dominate them,” Kara says. “If only they knew how much you love to bottom.”
Lena barks out an affronted laugh and Kara grabs for her hands appeasingly, which Lena bats away. “Don’t touch me.”
Laughing, Kara stalks forward and picks Lena up over her shoulder, walking forwards until she can deposit her on the edge of the desk. “You can totally be a power bottom,” she says, eyes dancing as she stands between her open legs.
They don’t have time to do much. Lena’s got a meeting soon and Kara has a paid vacation day where she promised to spend at least part of it with Nia who booked the same day off, so she should really get going. And yet, Lena leans in, kissing Kara soundly.
“I despise you, darling,”
It’s whispered against her lips and Kara feels the smile that chases it, feels it bloom inside of her.
“Tell me about it.”
Kara touches down on her window ledge and sighs. It’s late and she’s not in a good mood. Her dinner date with Lena was interrupted by a derailed train and dozens of injured passengers, three of whom were dead by the time she arrived on scene.
Without her help, Kara knows that the number of deaths would have been higher but guilt always manages to gnaw its way under her skin; make her vow to be faster next time.
She steps down and closes the window quietly, noticing the table still set out with candles and her fancy plates from earlier. Her chest pangs as she kicks her boots off and trudges to the bedroom, shedding her suit as she goes.
Kara could hear it from across the city but something about hearing Lena’s steady heartbeat while she sees her sleeping in her bed stills everything in Kara, dulls the deafening noise of the city enough to find peace.
She showers quickly, super speeding her way through it until she’s climbing into bed. Kara is careful enough to be respectful of her girlfriend’s sleeping form but not so much that she’s worried if she doesn’t quite succeed. A selfish part of her wants Lena to wake up and they can finish their dinner and a bottle of wine. The logical, realistic part of Kara knows that there’s little chance of that happening at almost one in the morning on an icy January night when being under a warm duvet is the other option.
Kara settles down under the covers and Lena turns to her as if by a gravitational pull, easily fixing her warm, naked body to Kara’s side.
“Sorry I woke you,” Kara whispers to Lena’s soft hum. She strokes her thumb over Lena’s forearm, deep in thought about making it up to her for the abrupt departure on their date night, more than waking Lena up by going down on her, which she knows with full certainty that Lena enjoys. “Gonna make you the best piece of toast for breakfast in the morning.”
And the freshest squeezed orange juice, and—
“I love you,” Lena sighs, right into Kara’s shoulder, asleep with the next beat of her heart.
Kara’s had many moments with Lena that have had her adrenaline working overtime, a lot of them in this very bed, but none of them have made her feel like this. Weightless and totally free of burden, anticipation to wake up every day for as long as she’s blessed to have Lena by her side.
The fierce drum of Kara’s heart slows sooner than she initially worried, slipping into dreamless sleep without realising and waking to a blinding winter’s morning sun and the wonderful sensation of her girlfriend stretched out on top of her.
Kara doesn’t even know she’s seven feet in the air until Lena turns away from the sun and away from her , rolling right off her with a shriek.
Before she hits the mattress, and still half-asleep, Lena is caught in Kara’s strong arms where an apology is chanted until Lena’s brain catches up with what’s happened. She breaks out into delighted, affectionate laughter.
It turns out that life together as a Super and a Luthor is wonderful, but life as Kara and Lena is everything .
Notes:
That's all, folks. I hope you enjoyed! Thanks to ohnice1 for her sideline cheering when I was second-guessing myself. Made all the difference in not abandoning this fic for another 6 months.
I was going to wait to post this part until it felt more appropriate and sensitive to all going on in the US at the moment but if this can serve as a distraction to even one person then that's great. Praying for the safest outcome for you. You deserve that, and more. So much more.
Until next time, guys.
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