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The hesitation in her voice when she speaks, barely containing it from faltering as she stands there. Clarke has her back to her, shielding away her angelic face and Lexa keeps her arms motionless at her side.
"You wanted to see me?" Lexa breaks the silence. "I'm here."
Clarke doesn't reply, keeps her back turned to Lexa and blinks, wondering if she's really going to go through with this. She feels the knife in her hand, which is shielded from Lexa's view and suddenly she's nervous.
Lexa takes a step towards her, approaching. "Clarke…"
Her steps falter when Clarke swings around and advances on her. She's there in front of her, body pushing against her own as the dagger fits perfectly against the hollow of Lexa's throat. Clarke holds it there, vacant eyes staring into Lexa's. She's breathing heavily, darting eyes from the blade at Lexa's throat to her pristine face. Lexa can only stare, slightly wide eyed at the predicament she finds herself in. She is scanning Clarke's face for any sign of weakness and finds many staring back at her. She can't do this.
Clarke's eyes start to water the longer the blade is pressed against Lexa's throat, the uncertainty evident in her haunted eyes. Lexa remains unwaveringly calm.
"I'm sorry," it comes out barely above a whisper but Lexa says it. She has to say it.
The tears nearly blind her view, threatening to spill out. Clarke sniffles, heart clenching, and she gives Lexa a push as the knife drops from her throat. Clarke quickly turns around, not wanting to be vulnerable to Lexa's exquisite eyes. They make her want to bare all her pain and love , something Clarke is not ready to do.
The knife drops with a hollow echo on the floor by Clarke's feet.
"I never meant to turn you into this," Lexa's voice is so emotional, so raw, and Clarke doesn't know what to do but hold back another sob, lifting her head up slightly.
"You're free to go. Your mother is here. I'll have you escorted to her."
And just like that Lexa turns, dismissing herself. She's ready to leave, to rid herself from Clarke's presence and the thought sends an uncanny jolt through Clarke's spine.
"Wait," Clarke turns facing Lexa who stops by the door.
Lexa turns and looks at her, really looks at her , with such remorse and Clarke breaks. Feet cross the expanse between them and Lexa finds herself being shoved up against the door. Clarke is so close, too close , and she can feel the hot breath on her face. Lexa wants to speak, dares herself to, but Clarke silences any and all thoughts by attacking her lips. This isn't anything like their first kiss which was all soft and sweet. This is pure passion, betrayal, and the unwavering anger that Clarke feels. This is not romantic, this is not even tender. It's all teeth and tongue. Fast and rough.
Lexa holds Clarke, hands on her hips as Clarke grinds into her. Her head is spinning and she wants to go slow, cherish Clarke but that's not what Clarke wants . No, what she needs is this and Lexa will spend the rest of her life giving Clarke everything she needs.
Clarke pulls Lexa forward as she stumbles back towards the bed. Lexa is briefly aware of where this is going and the insufferable longing that is about to meet its end. Clarke roughly shoves Lexa down onto the bed before climbing on top, thighs planted firmly on each side of Lexa. They're both breathing heavily and Lexa can only stare in a heated daze when Clarke begins to remove her clothes. She sheds layer after layer, revealing each curve and expanse of skin Lexa has never seen before until she's completely bare on top of Lexa. Lexa is suddenly finding it incredibly hard to breathe as she takes in all of Clarke Griffin and oh God is it a sight.
Impatient fingers start undoing Lexa's clothes and all her bindings in such a fury it leaves her even more dazed. Clarke is on a mission, not stopping until she has Lexa fully exposed, breathing hard and pushing wispy strands of hair out of her face in a huff. She slides Lexa's pants down her muscled legs and remove her underwear along with it, leaving Lexa nude. Clarke's breath hitches at the sight and she rakes across every inch of her body like she's processing it to memory. Without a shadow of a doubt, Lexa is the most beautiful thing she's ever seen.
Lexa brings a hand up to Clarke's face, gently stroking it and Clarke remembers what exactly this is about. The touch is too sweet, too full of love , and Clarke can't go there. Clarke doesn't want the soft touches and whispering words of affection. She wants to fuck and be fucked, nothing else. Lexa can keep her soft touches. Clarke wants something devoid of all emotion. She wants to stop the gnawing pain in her heart and what she feels deep down in her soul. She just wants to get out of her head and get this angry betrayal out in the most constructive way she knows how.
Lexa doesn't think she's ever seen anything so beautiful, so mesmerizing than that of Clarke Griffin. She wants to take her time mapping each inch of Clarke's body but that won't happen. Not this time, maybe not ever as Clarke removes her delicate hand from her face. She squeezes, tightening her hold and body pressed against Lexa's. There is no part that isn't touching each other. Lexa's hands roam across the expanse of Clarke's back and Clarke bites her lip in a heated kiss stiffling her own moan. Her hands fist in Lexa's hair and she jerks her head back, exposing her neck. Exposing the neck she nearly sliced into. The neck she is now pressing hot open mouth kisses to. Lexa arches up into Clarke, hands grasping at the sheets and she's already moaning. Clarke moves her path from her neck to the valley between her breasts, licking in-between before taking a nipple into her mouth and sucking hard. Lexa nearly screams, the ice cold facade of the commander nowhere to be seen. She's panting hard, her own hands tightening in Clarke's hair and is she really begging for Clarke? She'll save the embarrassment for later.
Clarke is like a tornado amongst a sunny mild day, one that is not predicted and Lexa is caught in the crossfire of. She is swept up in the frenzy, yet she wouldn't want to be anywhere else but here with Clarke. Here in this vulnerable personal moment, her body like a temple for Clarke to ravish and it sets her skin on fire with each kiss, with each swirl of her tongue.
Clarke begins to descend further down south, pushing Lexa's legs wide open as she settles between them. Her fingers run like a feather across her inner thighs until she grips them with each hand and her tongue runs across her slit. Lexa arches so hard off the bed she nearly wonders how her back doesn't break with the movement and Clarke is entering her, tongue swiping through her folds. She wonders if this is heaven or hell when Clarke sets her pace, moving her tongue in such fluid motions. Lexa feels the pool in her stomach, the hot fevery skin, and every nerve like it's on fire. Clarke is relentless with Lexa's clit, setting an excruciating flickering pace and Lexa briefly wonders if Clarke will have any hair left at the end of this with her death-like grip.
"Please, Clarke… I can't take this…" Lexa is begging and Clarke finds it the most intoxicating thing in the world to hear.
She doesn't ease up on her speed, tongue frantically applying pressure to the clit until Lexa feels it pulsating, her body about to explode in an intense orgasm.
"Clarke, I'm about to…"
Her words are cut short when Clarke flicks her tongue nice and hard against her clit. She's coming, orgasm so intense it leaves her screaming and jerking up into Clarke. She feels like she's just ran a race, legs spasming with her orgasm and her heart left racing.
Clarke removes her tongue, traveling back up Lexa's body and she's kissing her with bruising force. There's little exhaustion on Clarke's face, just that broken look that makes Lexa's smile falter. She's happy with whatever she can get from Clarke, arms wrapping around her in a warm embrace. It makes Clarke uneasy, like a deer about to bolt. She snakes her hand between them, finding Clarke's entrance and one delicate finger sliding in. She doesn't want this to be over. She doesn't want Clarke to go and she wants to offer the other girl some kind of release. Clarke's breath hitches as she enters, pushing inside. Her forehead rests on top of Lexa's and her eyes flash with what Lexa can only interpret as fear… fear of letting Lexa actually get close to her heart.
Clarke starts grinding against Lexa's thigh, one finger buried inside her asking Lexa for another. She obliges, relishing in the moan Clarke gives her. She sets a slow even pace, fingers pumping in and out of her. It's too slow for Clarke, too tender, too full of love.
"Faster… harder…" she pants out and Lexa knows she won't be able to make love to Clarke tonight.
Her nails dig into Lexa's hips, moving with Lexa's fingers that set a harsher pace inside her. She is moaning on top of Lexa and Lexa can feel her own arousal multiply tenfold. Seeing Clarke on top, riding her fingers is an image she will never forget. A memory she will never let fade away, and when Clarke comes screaming, Lexa just holds her until she rides out the orgasm. It's too full of love.
Just in mere minutes, Lexa's arms become empty and Clarke slips out of the room without a word. Lexa feels the breaking of her heart, the faint taste of Clarke on her lips and she wonders if this will be the last time, the only time.
And in her heart she knows… it was just too full of love.