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Sirens blared, red lights flashed, and Pink realized they needed to go to the Communications Room right now. They started running in the corridors, heart beating a little bit too fast.
As always, their brain decided it was the perfect moment to remind them of their old PE teacher back during training, who frequently told them “your laziness is going to bite you in the ass one day” when Pink was refusing to do the running exercises with the others.
“Not dead yet” Pink muttered, sliding across the floor to reach the Storage’s door. The button beeped angrily, and the door refused to move. Pink swore under their breath, looking around frenetically before unclipping their tools from their belt and kneeling in front of the keypad.
Time was running out, they knew it, but they weren’t the one supposed to die here.
A distant yell erupted as Pink started unscrewing the door’s keypad, trying to get access to the wire hidden under the thick plating. It sounded like one of the crewmates – maybe Blue, or Brown – and Pink forced their hands to stay calm, crossing the wires to trick the door into opening. It was usually an easy task for Pink, the self-proclaimed best electrician of the ship, but right now, with the threat of a bloodthirsty impostor looming in the corridors, they were finding difficult to focus.
Another scream made them jump, their hands bumping against the metal casing of the keypad. It sounded like Red. Another one bites the dust, and Pink distantly wondered how many crewmates had died.
Finally, the door made a cheerful beeping noise, and opened. The Storage Room was dark, the emergency lights suspiciously off, and Pink didn’t hesitate, jumping to their feet to reach the door leading to the Communications Room across the room. Their hip bumped against a crate and they swallowed back a pained snarl.
Pink angrily pushed the crate out of their way, throwing a glance behind their shoulder to check the corridor. Still empty. Luck was on their side. If they could reach the Communications Room, everything was going to be fine. Or at least, one thing will be fine.
Repeating this sentence like a mantra, Pink reached the door, and it thankfully opened without any protest. The impostor had probably forgotten to hack this one. The Communications Room was right in front on them, door still opened, and Pink silently reached the threshold, bracing themselves, fists raised in front of them.
The room was empty. The bluish screen of the communications device basked the office in a strange, eerie atmosphere, and it was strangely silent, the blaring alarm muffled by the walls. Pink closed the door behind them, and went to sit down on the chair in front of the screen, fingers already poised on the keyboard, ready to launch the distress signal into the cold vacuum of space.
What a waste of time this trip had been, Pink though, trying to get rid of the emergency warning the screen displayed. “IMPOSTOR ABOARD” it said, as if Pink didn’t already know that.
With any luck, some passing ship would catch up the distress signal and come to their rescue. It wasn’t unusual, and a lot of survivors had been rescued like that, one of the less useless crewmate managing to send a call for help before hiding from the impostor.
Pink was finally able to find the distress signal command, pressed “send”, and checked one last time before rising from their seat.
An impostor was still on the loose. And Pink wasn’t ready to die.
They took their tablet, checking the communication system the crew shared. The last message was dated from three hours ago. It just read “Impostor! med bay!” and the sender, Purple, had been found dead by Yellow and Blue a few minutes later. Pink knew this because they had gone with them to check on their unfortunate crewmate, but they hadn’t lingered in the Med Bay to check on their dismembered body. Rather, they had immediately run to the Communications Room, knowing one of their last chances to escape from this mess was to hail another ship and hope for a swift rescue.
Pink wasn’t stupid. They knew MIRA had forbidden weapons on their ship, for “safety reasons”, but it hadn’t stop them from making sure they weren’t going to be completely powerless in front of a potential impostor.
Pink opened the door, and checked the corridors quickly before stepping out of the room. The alarm had stopped, and the lights were back to their usual yellowish color. Did the impostor manage to turn off the alarm?
Pink had to go to the dorms now; and it wasn’t really the closest room to their position, but it was that or hid like a coward in a closet waiting for the impostor to kill them. And Pink was a lot of things, but a coward wasn’t one of them. So they started running again, toward the dorms, listening for any noises indicating an impostor was after them.
The dorms were situated right next to the Cafeteria, and Pink spotted the bloody corpse of Yellow in one of the large room’s corner. They didn’t bother stopping to check on them. Considering their head had been ripped of their body, there were little to no chances the crewmate had survived. And also, Pink didn’t care about the other crewmates. It was every crewmate for themselves in this kind of situation.
The stench of blood was strong in the air, but Pink wasn’t going to throw up over something so inconsequential. They jogged toward the door leading to the door, checked behind them one last time, and slipped inside the dark room with cold determination.
The lights switched on, detecting their presence, and Pink looked around the room now illuminated by pale, dim lights. It was empty, thankfully, no corpse in sight, and Pink walked to their bed. Under it, they had hidden a special suitcase, with a tool that will help them take control of the ship and get rid of this nuisance of an impostor. They grab the suitcase, putting it on their bed to open it.
Unfortunately, Pink’s luck had apparently ran out, because the door swished open and Pink heard the very distinct sound of someone stepping in the room. They whipped around, hiding the suitcase with their body.
Standing in the threshold, a tall, bulky silhouette was projecting a long shadow on the floor that stretched toward Pink in a somewhat ominous way. A deep cackle resonated, and Pink barely managed to suppress an exasperated eye roll.
“You are the last one, Pink” a smug voice said, and the silhouette stepped into the room. It was Black, as Pink had already guessed, because of course the weird, quiet and misanthropic crewmate was an impostor. “It took me longer than I thought to find you, I must admit. You are good at hiding…”
Oh no, was Black monologuing?
“… And White gave me some troubles, they tried to call for backup, but I caught them before they reached the communications room. It’s kind of cute, to see all of you struggle like that. It’s one of the best things about killing people.”
They were monologuing. As if the situation couldn’t be worse than Pink stuck in a room with an impostor.
Said impostor was a fucking melodramatic edge lord.
“Ah, sweet, sweet Pink… Did you try to escape the ship? What were you planning to do in the dorms, hide under a bed? Pretend to be asleep?”
Pink, who had never been called sweet in their all entire life, winced, and put their hands on their hips.
“Do you talk like that to all of your victims? No wonder it took you so long to find me, if you forced the other crewmates to listen to your pathetic monologue before killing them. Maybe they died of boredom. Or second-hand embarrassment” Pink drawled, taking a small step back to get closer to the suitcase.
Apparently, impostors weren’t used to crewmates talking back. Black froze, eyes stupidly wide and surprised. Pink suppressed a sneer, and slowly grabbed the handle of their weapon behind their back.
“Not so sweet, it turns out” the impostor finally shot back, and their wicked smile was back on their face, a black, slimy tongue poking from behind their sharp teeth. They had splashes of blood all over their clothes. “It doesn’t matter. You are the last one.”
“And then what?” Pink challenged, and they felt way better now that their weapon was in their hand.
“Then I call for help, pretend an impostor had killed everyone and fled the ship, and I infiltrate another crew. And I kill them all again. Did you really think this was my first rodeo?” The impostor’s smug voice was different for the one of the Black crewmate Pink had learned to recognize. More deep, and with a strange reverberation to it.
“It was nice talking to you, but now, you die” Black – or whatever it was left of them – hissed, and their already impressive build started to change, growing and expanding, strange oversized limbs stretching and twisting, their mouth opening and slicing their face in half, razor-sharp teeth glinting in the light.
Pink had a clear disadvantage here. Their own teeth were not that sharp, and they were pretty small, even for a crewmate. Below average, even. All odds were against them, it seemed.
But Pink had never been the kind to give up easily. Before the impostor had the time to pounce on them and rip them to shred, they whipped their weapon from behind their back, and aimed at Black’s chest.
“What it that?” The impostor snarled, clearly not expecting a crewmate as sweet as Pink to fight back quite so literally.
Pink allowed a satisfied smile to grace their lips, feeling rather proud of themselves.
“That is a flamethrower, you moron. And I’m pretty sure your species doesn’t appreciate heat.”
The impostor took a step back, frame deflating like an old balloon.
“How do you know that?” They asked, their previous smugness completely gone, replaced by a mix of anger and fear.
“Just something I guessed. You avoided the reactor and engines rooms like the pest, you never slept under your covers, you preferred to eat your meals cold, and you turned off the central heating more than once.”
Something changed in the impostor’s face – something akin to begrudging respect. Pink smiled brightly, and removed the safety of the flamethrower with a satisfying click.
“Now, if you don’t want to end up fried like a pathetic sausage, you better listen to me.”
The impostor squared their shoulder, looming menacingly. “I should have killed you days ago, when we were alone in Electrical” they snarled, but didn’t dare to step forward.
Pink only smiled harder. “Oh, I would have loved to see you try. I had a smoldering iron in one hand, and a stun gun hidden in my boot. You wouldn’t have lasted long.”
The impostor was taken aback, and could only look at Pink with a surprised expression. Then their face shifted, morphing into a frown.
“What are you?” They asked, hissing like an angry cat. Pink couldn’t resist the satisfied giggle that escaped them.
“Just a normal crewmate. The right question would be: who am I?”
The impostor tilted their head, looking more angry than curious at the guessing game Pink was throwing at them. Pink smiled, relentless, and cocked the flamethrower menacingly.
“Fine, who are you?” The impostor’s glare could have melted metal, but not Pink’s confidence.
“Well, thanks for asking! I am an assassin. Trained to kill since my childhood. And I don’t take lightly threats against my own life, you see…”
The impostor stayed silent, mouthing “assassin?” with a bewildered look on their face. Pink laughed, light and easy.
“You said you killed everyone except me, right?” They prompted, rising one eyebrow, and the impostor nodded. “Maybe I should thank you. I was sent to kill White, and you took care of them for me.”
The impostor stared, blinking.
“Why White?” They asked, more interested in Pink’s story than expected.
Pink shrugged, not letting their guard down.
“The IRS required my… services. White had been committing tax fraud for twenty years, and they were tired of running after them.”
“Tax fraud?? You were supposed to kill White just for that?” The impostor asked, clearly distraught.
Pink frowned, and moved the flamethrower a little bit to remind the impostor they weren’t in charge here. Did impostors draw the line at unjustified killing, instead of indiscriminate slaughter?
“Yes, tax fraud. But I don’t really care why, as long as I’m being paid. I killed for less than that. Do you know how much money White owned to the IRS?”
Impostors probably didn’t even know what the IRS was, so Black only shook their head. Pink made a satisfied sound, and smiled.
“A lot. So, they deserved it. And now you killed my mark for me, I just need to get rid of you before another ship arrive.” They took a step forward, and the impostor hurryingly stepped back, rising their arms in a placating gesture.
“You contacted another ship?” They asked, looking around frenetically.
“Yes. While you were busy monologuing to my poor, poor crewmates, I sent a distress signal. A few ships should have picked it up by now.”
The impostor snarled, and threw up their hands. Pink immediately aimed at their head, finger brushing the trigger of the flamethrower, ready to push and let the impostor burn to death.
“Wait!”
Pink wasn’t one to be moved by pleads, and the impostor’s voice was not supplicating. It was too angry and resentful for that. Still, they stopped, eyebrows cocked.
“What now?” They asked, almost impatient. They couldn’t let the other ships discover what was going on, and the clock was ticking. They needed to kill the impostor, and drag their lifeless body to the upper engine. It would be easy to pretend they had tricked the impostor and pushed them in the furnace.
“Have you ever thought about teaming up with someone?” The impostor prompted, urgently, eyes strained on the flamethrower.
Pink burst out laughing, rather dramatically, to be honest. It was unlike them to be so emotional, but the question was hilarious.
They took the time to wipe an imaginary tear under their eyes before securing their grip on the flamethrower.
“Teaming up?” They repeated, grinning widely. “In what world do you live? An assassin teaming up with another assassin is a disaster waiting to happen. Trust no one, except yourself. Did no one teach you that during impostor’s training?”
The impostor shuffled awkwardly, obviously vexed by Pink’s condescending tone. “There are no impostor’s trainings.” They muttered, looking around to avoid Pink’s eyes. “Everything I know, I learned it myself.”
“Ah yes, you learned the great art of ripping people’s head off with your teeth, lurking around in dark corridors, and dramatic boring monologues.”
Black frowned, and crossed their arms on their impressively large chest. Pink smiled cheekily. It was almost too easy to rile them up.
“I’m just saying. I killed White for you…”
Pink interrupted them. “Correction: you killed White before I could do it. You just… sped up the procedure. Do you want a thank you?”
A dark, grumpy glare was the only answer Pink got, but they didn’t take offence in Black’s unwillingness to humor them. They stepped forward, and this time, the impostor didn’t move, dark eyes looking straight into Pink’s own eyes. They were angry, and maybe… thwarted.
“Alright, do it” The impostor muttered, and Pink was a bit put off by the sudden mood swing. Two minutes ago, the impostor was ready to fight and now, they were just… giving up. Disappointing, coming from the creature that had killed in cold blood the entirety of the crew, save from Pink, of course.
Pink brushed a finger over a speck of dust lingering on the flamethrower.
“Not so fast. You picked my interest. What kind of advantages can I expect from a partnership with you?”
The impostor’s eyes gleamed, a slow, murderous smile appearing on their lips.
“If we hadn’t been able to lure the impostor in the upper engine room and throw them in the furnace, I don’t know what would have happened” Pink stammered, clenching an already drenched tissue in their hands. The sympathetic crewmate responsible for collecting their testimony only nodded, a compassionate look on their face.
Pink sniffled, and beside them, Black awkwardly patted their shoulder. Impostors were not great actors, it turned out, and Pink had taken upon them to do most of the talking, pretending Black was still “in shock” and struggling to form words. It worked perfectly.
“So the impostor was… Blue, is that it?” The crewmate, who sported an ugly neon green jumpsuit, asked in confirmation, and Pink nodded, closing their eyes and shaking a little bit for good measure.
They dabbed their teary eyes, and kicked Black’s shin to force them to act their part. The impostor stayed stoic, but they glared murderously at Pink when the neon crewmate shifted their attention to the computer screen.
“I… We want to know… are there any other survivors?” Black asked, and Pink was almost impressed by their fake, worried tone.
The crewmate slowly shook their head, a considerate expression on their face. “I’m sorry, but you two are the only ones.”
Black hung their head, and sighted very loudly, a hand coming to rub their face like the news was too hard for them to accept. Pink added another little sniffling sound, and forced another few tears to escape their eyes. Neon Green pushed the box of tissues in their direction, kind eyes looking at them with deep sympathy.
Pink was internally jubilating. The last of their worries had just been squashed down. Since no one had survived, their little lie was doomed to be believed by everyone.
“You know, it’s rare we found survivors of impostor’s attacks. You two were very lucky, and resourceful! You should be proud of yourselves.”
Pink managed a small, tired smile, as if it was a valid reassurance, and Black looked down with sad eyes.
“I wish we could have saved everybody” They whispered, and Pink almost burst out laughing and hid their smile behind their tissue.
“I know, I know. The medic wants to see you two, then you will be free to go to rest. You must be very tired” The poor crewmate continued, oblivious to Pink’s amusement and Black’s dramatic acting.
They stood, and Neon Green (Lime, probably) accompanied them to the door, and patted their shoulder encouragingly. As soon as the door was closed and they were alone in the corridor, Pink straightened their back and threw the wet tissues in a nearby trash disposal, lips curled in disgust. They took a few steps in the corridors in silence, side by side, Pink rubbing their cheeks to get rid of the last sticky traces of tears.
“You are a great actor” Black noted, voice rumbling, arms crossed, and Pink looked at them condescendingly, trying not to feel flattered by the compliment.
“Well, thank you. You were not so bad yourself. I bet they loved the whole oh if only I could have saved everybody bit” They said, mimicking Black’s weird voice at the best of their capacities, but their vocal cords seemed to lack what made it so… deep.
Black smiled, showing the edge of sharp’s teeth, and Pink sauntered forward, readying themselves for another act of mourning crewmate.
“Can I kill them after we are done pretending to be sad?” The impostor asked, whispering in their ear, and Pink almost slapped them for standing so close to them, but decided it was not worth it. They tapped their chin with a finger, thinking about it.
“Well. I don’t see why you couldn’t. But first, I need to check on my contracts. Maybe there is someone here for me to kill. After all, you stole my prey last time.”
“Deal” Black said, smiling widely, teeth glowing and eyes mischievous. Pink snickered. They shook hands, just for show, and Pink realized this partnership was way more amusing than they expected.
“Don’t get too confident or I might just start to appreciate you” Pink warned, light and funny, but a dangerous edge hidden behind their easy smile.
And with that, they knocked on the Med Bay’s door, fake tears already forming beneath their eyes.
