Chapter Text
The meeting of the Tian Gong twelve peak lords came to a close and the first to leave was the Bai Zhan peak lord. As he made his way back to Bai Zhan peak with the wind blowing long black hair in the wind, he distantly thought to himself. The meeting didn’t prove to come to any decent results, it didn’t make logical sense to the peak lord. See, Shen Qingqiu, the subject of the meeting, was the exact type to have been the same from childhood. Memory loss from Qi Deviation simply did not explain such a thing.
The peak lord’s thoughts wandered as he walked. His eyes were no longer on the path in front of him, but rather on the sky above. What could have possibly occurred to Shen Qingqiu in order for him to not only save Liu Qingge but also become so simply...agreeable. He found himself continuing to think of Qing Jing peak lord for some time until it was as though his thoughts had materialized the very man in front of him.
“Liu-shidi, what brings you to Qing Jing peak?” The voice that rang in his ears was enough to bring his eyes down from the sky and ground him from his thoughts. His dark eyes landed on the man in front of him, and it was as though he was looking at the sun. Though this Shen Qingqiu had the same face, the same body, and the same green eyes, it was as though he had been reimagined entirely. To say that life had filled the cold and scheming husk that was once Shen Qingqiu was an understatement.
As those words left Shen Qingqiu’s lips, they weren’t indifferent and cold, they weren’t spoken as an attack, rather… it was a warm welcome with the promise of equally as warm hospitality. Their previous animosity towards each other seemed to be dissolved.
Liu Qingge seemed choked up on his response as his brows knitted together with a slight frown on his lips. What did bring him to Qing Jing peak? When did his feet move towards this way without his knowledge of doing so?
“You.” He stated after some time. Shen Qingqiu’s expression didn’t show his surprise, but Liu Qingge could see it in his eyes. They weren’t the eyes he was used to, they were full of more emotion that made such a cold shade of green appear to be bursting with warmth and beauty like that of a gem. Liu Qingge wasn’t a romantic, so that novel-like realization was a bit jarring.
“Will you join me for some tea?” Shen Qingqiu offered. Liu Qingge thought it over. It’s not like he had any disciples to handle on Bai Zhan peak, unlike the countless that Shen Qingqiu seemed to have. Liu Qingge simply nodded and allowed Shen Qingqiu to walk next to them as they headed towards his bamboo house. Liu Qingge glanced and observed Shen Qingqiu. Even the way his hair was styled seemed to be different. Whereas the Qing Jing peak lord he knew wore his hair straight as possible and proper, that one… the Shen Qingqiu that stood next to him… his hair was a bit loose. There were strands that hung down and framed his face and the bun wasn’t so tight. His long black hair seemed to fall to rest wherever it liked, which starkly contrasted the suffocating style Liu Qingge was used to seeing. Even the peak lord’s clothes were looser and brighter in color.
Though Shen Qingqiu’s face was seemingly lacking the ability to give away emotion, Liu Qingge had seen it enough times to notice something like a slight curve to Shen Qingqiu’s lips while the shadows and spots of sunlights peeking from bamboo leaves shined down on them. This was too serene and comfortable for Liu Qingge to bear with his normal mindset.
Upon reaching the bamboo house, Shen Qingqiu sat at the table in the man room and called out for his disciple to pour the two of them tea. Liu Qingge sat across from them and watched the little disciple quickly and obediently layout tea for them. Luo Binghe was his name, Liu Qingge thought. Perhaps something else, but it’s not like it was his disciple so why should he care.
“Thank you, Binghe. You’re dismissed.” Shen Qingqiu offered a smile to Luo Binghe. Binghe looked to Liu Qingge, then to Shen Qingqiu. For a split second, a dark emotion filled Binghe’s eyes, but it was quickly shaken away as if he didn’t want Shen Qingqiu to notice. Luo Binghe left the bamboo house and left the two to speak. Shen Qingqiu opened his face and lightly fanned himself while lifting his cup of tea to take a sip. “What would you like to speak about in regards to me, Liu-shidi?”
Shen Qingqiu understood that it was a dangerous game to ask Liu Qingge to speak, as his shidi seemed to struggle with that aspect greatly. Though he had his own curiosities as to why Liu Qingge would want to see him specifically. Liu Qingge wasn’t exactly known to enjoy the original goods. Though it wasn’t bad to have Liu Qingge on his side, he did have to be careful not to get killed. Or piss off the system.
“Did you experience a Qi deviation?” Liu Qingge jumped right to the case. He had his suspicions that it was not a Qi deviation, but he’d figure out his next set of questions after hearing Shen Qingqiu’s response. Shen Qingqiu raised an eyebrow and set his teacup down. It seemed as though his eyes were scanning Liu Qingge, trying to ascertain what would be an appropriate response to such a sudden question.
“What a sudden question, Liu-shidi.” Shen Qingqiu decided to go the route of speaking in a way to judge Liu Qingge on how improper it was of him to ask such a question. It was not only improper but impolite. Shen Qingqiu still had to hold some of the original goods' regality in order to not throw off the nature of the world too much. He had already long understood that the character Shen Qingqiu had quite the influence, leaving little ripples with everything he did.
Much to Shen Qingqiu’s dismay, his dear Liu-shidi was not thrown off by this. He merely looked to Shen Qingqiu, still expecting an answer nonetheless. Shen Qingqiu met his gaze and looked at him, head slightly tilting. He distantly wondered what could possibly be going through Liu Qingge’s head to ask such a question. By his body’s behavior, it didn’t seem as if he was desperate for an answer to explain something. It seemed as though he already knew that whatever answer Shen Qingqiu gave, it would either not be the truth or not be the whole truth.
Shen Qingqiu felt a ball forming in his throat and it almost felt suffocating to speak. It felt like whatever he said might not have a result he was ready for if his words were spoken out into the world. As the silence seemed to overtake the room, Liu Qingge’s eyes narrowed further. He looked Shen Qingqiu up and down, then he got up to his feet.
Liu Qingge opened his mouth as if to say something, though no words came out. He left the bamboo house, leaving Shen Qingqiu alone at a table set for two. Shen Qingqiu put his head in his hands once he was sure he was by himself within his home and not under prying eyes. He could not lie and say that that wasn’t an intimidating experience. Who knows how this world would shatter if they found out it was a novel, and Shen Yuan had transmigrated into it with the responsibility of aiding the protagonist in his transformation. Shen Yuan, who knew just about everything in the world. Shen Yuan who knew the character’s darkest secrets, for it was Airplane Bro who wrote those facts into existence.
Such a fate was burdensome on Shen Yuan. He was forever stuck within the box of Shen Qingqiu and unable to move outside of the box, lest everything fall apart. The meeting with Liu Qingge told Shen Yuan something that almost made him feel like coughing up blood. He needed to do better to act as though he was still Shen Qingqiu, but perhaps he’d ride on the idea of a Qi Deviation causing memory loss. Shen Yuan lifted his head and straightened his posture, then called for Binghe to pick up the tea.
He didn’t feel as though Liu Qingge would go around telling people that Shen Qingqiu seemed suspicious. It was a fruitless effort. Shen Yuan had gone through many trials already to prove he had not been possessed or compromised in any way. The system made his replacement of Shen Qingqiu’s soul with his own to be without fault.
Shen Yuan watched Binghe clean up the tea with thinking eyes. What a fate he was burdened with, and not a single soul he could tell about how much it hurt him.
~*~
Time passed like this for a few years, that same suffocating feeling of being alone never dissipating. It hit him like a truck after he forced Binghe down. Sure, Binghe was a good disciple, but it wasn’t as though that’s what made him wander as if his soul had been lost. There was something haunting about not knowing of his fate beyond this point. Shen Yuan was surely terrified. Would Binghe come back and kill him? Rip off his limbs? A human stick fate is surely all that was awaiting him.
How else do people react to knowledge of their imminent death? How does someone, who learns they only have a few months left to live, react? Sure, Shen Yuan knew his time limit was 5 years. 5 years until Binghe would surely come back and get his revenge.
He spent the first few months being quite absent aside from the most important of obligations. Shen Yuan knew his disciples worried for him, but he worried for them the most. Binghe’s temper would be hard to simmer, and who’s to say his precious disciples would be safe from it?
Another day was passing and Shen Yuan found himself in his bed, staring at the wall. It was a burdensome and stressful life indeed. It was all that sadistic system’s fault!! Airplane bro as well for creating such a 2D scummy villain… If Shen Yuan was able, he’d choke both out for making him come to this fate. This was the only world he could truly live in, if he were sent back to his home, he’d be dead.
Shen Yuan was laying like that when he heard footsteps, and then a voice. His mind was so occupied that he could hardly register if the person was even there, or who was even speaking.
“Are you ill?” There was a bit of concern to the voice, and it made Shen Yuan’s chest ache. It wasn’t the same concern as he’d hear from a disciple.
“Yes.” Shen Yuan replied while still staring at the wall, not turning to see who was speaking.
“What is it?” The person stepped closer to the bed.
“I’m going to die in 5 years.” His response was very matter-of-fact as if this was indisputable and unavoidable. It was a fate staring him down with its sharp blade pointed at his throat as he stood on a cliff.
“You won’t.” The way this sentence was said in such a protective and angry way. Not angry at Shen Yuan, no, but angry at what could possibly even think to try to kill Shen Yuan. Poor voice, it did not know how powerful Luo Binghe would come to be. The voice didn’t stand a chance. “You won’t.” The voice repeated and stepped closer.
“I will. I pushed Binghe down. As written in the novel, he comes back with thirsting revenge and tricks me, then he cuts off my legs and sends them back to Yue Qingyuan to trick him. It’s all written out as what is to happen. He’ll be an unstoppable demon lord. Killing anyone in his way and collecting 300 flowers.” Shen Yuan knew all of this because he’d read Proud Immortal Demon Way to know it all. He knew everything about the book, despite overall disliking it.
“That one is a demon?” The voice asked inquisitively, Shen Yuan almost laughed at how it glossed over absolutely everything else but that one fact.
“He is a half-demon. Though his blood is powerful, Heavenly Demon Blood at that, and he activated it at the Immortal Alliance Conference.” Shen Yuan curled in on himself slowly as he remembered the event. His sword injured Binghe twice. Binghe did not resist. He ruthlessly tossed Binghe down into the Abyss.
The voice didn’t respond. Quiet for a moment that filled the room. Yes, dear voice. Shen Yuan thought. Do you see how low in hope the situation is??
“I’m stronger.”
That actually made Shen Yuan laugh.
“Don’t laugh. I am.”
“How are you stronger? He has enough power to destroy the demon world as well as our own if he wanted.” Shen Yuan rubbed his forehead.
“I’ll get stronger. No one will lay a hand on you without losing their head first.” The voice snapped out, then began walking away. Shen Yuan sat up and looked towards where the voice was walking away and only managed to catch the long wisps of a ponytail flowing in the air, formed by a brisk walk. Shen Yuan’s eyes widened as he only knew of one man with such a color of hair in a ponytail like that. Liu Qingge.
So it was a real conversation. Shen Yuan put his head in his hands. What to do, what to do, what to do! He quickly got out of bed and adjusted his robes and ran after Liu Qingge. “Liu-shidi! Wait! That was all nonsense, I apologize, I was hardly awake!” Shen Yuan tried as he reached the front entrance to the bamboo house, where Liu Qingge had stopped walking and was looking back at him.
“I’m glad you’re not him. Stop trying to be.” Liu Qingge simply said. Shen Yuan didn’t know what to say. He just stayed standing there, locked into eye contact with Liu Qingge. What could he have meant by that? The only possible answer would be that Liu Qingge knew he was not Shen Jiu. Though that… that… that wasn’t possible. Surely, right? It would be a relief, definitely. In the back of his mind, he desperately wished for that to be the case. Though he just couldn’t explain how that worried him. What would come of Liu Qingge knowing he was not Shen Jiu? As if to answer his question, Liu Qingge spoke once more. “You… name.” Shen Yuan swallowed. Should he answer? He decided he should.
“...Shen Yuan.” Liu Qingge nodded shortly, then began walking away. Leaving Shen Yuan on his own in the Bamboo house. Shen Yuan slid down to the ground and watched Liu Qingge’s figure fade away. Liu Qingge knew. Liu Qingge even knew his real name. All because Shen Yuan told him. Though he seemed fine with it. Shen Yuan didn’t know what to make of any of it.
~*~
Imagine relief beyond words. Imagine falling progressively for the same person and not feeling good about it, then being hit with the blissful knowledge that you no longer had to feel bad. Liu Qingge was hit with this upon hearing the name of the man he’d begun to see in such a warm and golden light. Shen Yuan. He probably repeated it to himself in his head 10,000 times over. Shen Yuan. Shen Yuan. Shen Yuan.
Shen Yuan was a bit lazier than Shen Qingqiu. Shen Yuan was smarter, too. Shen Yuan wore his hair a bit looser and let it flow in the sun. Shen Yuan didn’t always smile with his lips, but with his eyes. You could see the way they squinted a bit and how they lit up. Such a beautiful shade like bamboo leaves, glowing and captivating. Shen Yuan, who had been acting for so long and had to use a fan to hide if he slipped up. Shen Yuan who didn’t speak as formally as Shen Qingqiu. Shen Yuan who wasn’t some rat who abused others, he showed genuine care. It was no wonder many of his disciples had come to adore him so ever since Shen Yuan came to the sect. Shen Yuan. Shen Yuan. Liu Qingge wanted to protect this Shen Yuan forever.
This Shen Yuan, though Liu Qingge didn’t understand how, knew of an impending version of the future. In this version, there was the possibility of Shen Yuan dying. That, Liu Qingge would not take. Liu Qingge would rather cultivate for 1000 hours or even more just to prevent Shen Yuan from dying.
He couldn’t explain this falling sensation he felt towards Shen Yuan. It quite literally felt like falling. He was slipping and losing his grip, saying more than he would’ve normally, even going to see Shen Yuan in person, devoting all of his cultivation towards being powerful. Sure, it was jarring that the disciple Shen Yuan had been raising for the past few years was a demon lord capable of killing his shizun, but more than that, Luo Binghe, this demon lord, would be trying to kill Liu Qingge’s Shen Yuan.
Yes. His Shen Yuan. Most definitely. A Shen Yuan who wasn’t the Shen Qingqiu he despised, but the Shen Yuan he was slipping and losing his grip on his actions for and would happily become the strongest man in every world for.