Chapter Text
Today is not just another day of Midoriya Izuku’s life.
If someone comes to him and says his favorite hero will come and save him, he would probably tell them it’s just a wishful thinking (while silently hoping it to be true).
He never expected to have his dream crushed by the hero though.
He let dirty shoes and bruised feet take him home, with eyes stuck on the pavement and mind still racing about today’s event. He had saved someone today, even though that someone had yelled at him and wouldn’t admit it. Even though everyone said it was foolish and reckless. That’s okay.
It was the closure he needed.
He felt something wet on his cheek.
“-ku! Izuku!”
Looking up, he saw his mother bawling her eyes out.
Oh. He had arrived at home.
“I’m so worried! I saw Katsuki on the news and I thought I saw your hair poking out! Why are you so dirty? Are you hurt? Did that villain hurt you too? I’m so worried, I can’t take it, Izuku!”
He managed to give her a smile, and tried to ease her worry while also reminding her about the neighbor under them that got leaks because of her tears. Her mother’s words brought him back to his thoughts, to All Might’s advice and kacchan’s taunt from before.
He made his decision.
“Mom, I- I’m giving up on becoming a hero.”
---
Izuku later found out that finding a new dream can be as hard as giving up on one.
His boogle history must be full right now, yet he still hadn’t made a decision. Of course, he already eliminated jobs that aren’t possible for someone quirkless. Jobs like medic, police officer (funny, he thought all might scold him to dream the attainable and suggest him to join the police), and firefighters are out, since they require quirk control certification, leaving no chance for the ones who have no quirk to begin with. Office jobs, law practice, and entertainment industry have insanely high discrimination rate against quirkless individuals so they’re out too. Teacher? Students who saw their teacher beneath them wouldn’t hear anything their teacher says, said a retired quirkless teacher in a forum. And of course, the hero industry is out. There is no quirkless hero recorded, and he was not sure that hero support will be different. There is only one quirkless individual who made a big name despite of her situation, and that is mainly because her father worked with All Might. No matter how promising she is, every media pictures her as a pity case.
To be honest, Izuku had already cried more than 6 times in the passing hour.
Then he found out that quirkless people are also having difficulty to get a part time job.
Don’t fall, tears. Don’t f- too late.
A knocking sound interrupted him and a glass of milk was put on his desk by his mother. His only joy.
“Thank you, mom.”
“Don’t be too hard on yourself, dear. I’m sure you’ll think of something.”
He laughed out of his tiredness. “I tried mom, you know I always love to compile data and analyze it. Well, according to the data, I have no future,” he cupped his face. “I can’t believe it. I was so delusional before. No wonder everyone got sick of me.”
There were definitely no tears.
Inko only looked at her son guiltily. It was her fault, after all. it was her that keep feeding him with hero toys, it was her fault that her son is quirkless. So she apologized, again and again, not realizing how her son’s shoulder had stiffened.
“it’s okay mom.. it’s- it’s not your fault.”
Then whose fault is it?
---
He wanted to sleep, really. But sleep just hadn’t come to him and he was tired. His mind felt empty yet full, and everything felt numb. He had stared the ceiling for an hour, accompanied by his mother’s quiet sob from behind the wall.
He didn’t know how to feel.
First, he was told to jump off a roof (Kacchan didn’t mean it, of course, izuku knew it). He met a villain right after and was almost dead (Haha? Why did he saw humor in it just now?) Then, he was saved by his hero and got told to chase a more attainable dream. He saved Kacchan from the same villain, and got reprimanded by heroes.
Heroes that did nothing when Kacchan suffocated.
He saw the articles, alright. He was barely mentioned, and described as a quirkless friend who’s in over his head and jumped in a situation in which he wasn’t needed.
But- izuku knew though. Izuku knew how suffocating the slime is, and kacchan could only hold his breath for so long. He bought some time. That’s more than what the heroes did, standing in front of the crowd doing nothing.. like some kind of a bystander?
But they’re hero, though?
They’re hero,
Right?
“Izuku,” his mother called. Izuku quickly snapped out of it and caught her silhouette on the door frame.
“Yes mom?”
“Are you still thinking about the new dream?”
He let out an awkward laugh. “What gave you the idea?”
“I can hear your mumbling from miles away,” his mother’s eyes wrinkled from the soft smile she gave him, and if he noticed how red they were, none of them was willing to talk about it. “You have got time, Izuku. Don’t rush it.”
“I’m going to high school soon, mom.”
That earned him a laugh. “You had just supported my point, though. Dream job is still in a distant future. Why not search for a dream for the near future? What do you want to do, right now?”
I want to save people, his thought betrayed him.
With the door closing, izuku was left alone once again with his mind. Why is it so hard for him to find another dream? Why can’t he save people like his original dream? Is he really the useless Deku? Is it because the quirklessness? Why though? Why does quirklessness matter so much? Why does quirk matter so much? Why does a strain of DNA matter so much?
His mind kept rummaging one issue after one issue, and soon, his fog of thoughts cleared, and his eyes glinted beneath the night sky.
He found his purpose. He found his new dream.
Rising from his bed, he grabbed a new notebook on his shelf. He wrote on the cover page.
Analysis for New Dream Project #1