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Early one Friday morning, Castiel Novak is working his regular shift at the public library with his friend Charlie Bradbury. Unfortunately for the twenty three year old, his red-haired friend has decided to bring up the dreaded topic of dating. Again.
“Give me one good reason why you refuse to get your sweet ass back out on the market!” Charlie declares as the two young adults busy themselves with checking books back into the library’s system.
Castiel sighs and reprimands his friend for being too loud before answering her with what he thought was an obvious explanation for his reluctance.
“First of all, keep your voice down. We work in a library you know. Secondly, you of all people should know why I don’t date.” He gave her a look that read ‘do I really have to spell it out?’
Charlie huffs out an annoyed breath.
“Cas, Danny is seven, almost eight years old! I don’t think he’d care if you started dating some people! Heck, he might even encourage it!” Cas can tell his friend is struggling to keep her voice down.
Looking his friend in the eyes, Castiel gives her a death glare.
“I believe I have already explained to you what began happening a few weeks ago, did I not? And I think it is a good explanation for my reluctance towards dating, don’t you? ” Charlie looks away, slightly guilty now after remembering the story Castiel had relayed to her about a month-and-a-half ago. It being late March now, Charlie remembers back in early February when Cas came to work looking, frankly, like shit. When she asked him what was wrong, he said that his son Daniel had been acting strangely ever since they went to a Pizza and Ice Cream Parlor to get something to eat one day. He’s been asking strange questions, moping around the house, and hardly ever spoke to anyone that wasn’t Cas.
Even stranger, Daniel was as clingy as ever towards his father. He never wanted anyone near Castiel for longer then he deemed necessary, and Daniel was always with his father when he wasn’t in school. And he was unnecessarily over-protective of Castiel on top of it all. It was so unlike his baby boy.
All in all, Castiel was very worried about his son.
“I would not feel comfortable leaving Daniel alone while I went around looking for a date. And I’m sure he feels the same way.” Castiel says, his glare softening into his usual stare.
“I know Cas, but I think maybe being separated from Danny for a while will be good for the two of you.”
When Castiel opens his mouth to protest, Charlie holds up a hand to stop him.
“Even you have to admit it Cas; you coddle the boy too much and he’s too dependent on you,” a delicate eyebrow raises and Charlie gives her friend a look.
Sighing again, Castiel turns away from her before he speaks again.
“I know Charlie, but… it’s just…” Cas feels himself beginning to tear up. He rubs the tears away furiously, upset with himself for letting his emotions get a hold of him. He turns back to his friend and they lock eyes again. Cas’s voice cracks when he speaks again.
“He’s all I’ve got.”
Charlie, giving her friend a small smile, replies, “I know bud. Which is why you need to think of what’s best for him. And going out for a night to yourself will be good for you. Both of you. I promise. Hey! I’ll even babysit for you tonight!” She gives her friend a big bright smile and claps him on the shoulder.
Castiel looks at her, unsure, before he nods his head in reluctance.
“Fine. But just for tonight, and just this once.”
Charlie throws her hands in the air and cheers.
“I’ll be at your place, six o’clock sharp! Put on something that shows off that ass!”
Castiel blushes at his friend’s exclamation before reminding her to be quiet.
A few minutes before six, Castiel is sitting on the couch in his living room in his usual attire; a dark suit, unbuttoned to show his white dress shirt, a pair of black slacks, and a pair of the nice dress shoes that he uses for work. He forgoes the blue tie he normally wears, feeling that he’d look like an idiot wearing such a thing to a bar. That, and Charlie would probably just take it off of him anyways. He figures he’d save her the trouble.
At five fifty-nine in the evening, there’s a knock at the door. Castiel rises from the couch and, as he heads for the front door, he calls into the house;
“Daniel, come greet your Aunt Charlie!” When at the front door, Cas gets no response other than the sound of footsteps heading towards him from his son’s bedroom.
“Hiya Cas!” Charlie says cheerily once the young man opens the door. She steps inside as he greets her with a gravely, “Hello Charlie.” Out of the corner of his eyes, Cas sees a small silhouette standing in the threshold of the dining room. As he turns toward said silhouette, he gives a soft smile.
“Daniel, come say hello to Charlie.”
Daniel shuffles over to his father’s side quickly, using both of his small hands to grab onto his dad’s larger one. “Hi Aunt Charlie,” he mumbles, looking up at her through his black rimmed glasses.
“Hey Kiddo,” she reaches down to ruffle his thick, dark hair. He gives her a small smile in return. “So, did your dad tell you what’s goin’ on tonight?” She asks the small boy. Daniel nods once before lifting his father’s arm and hugging Castiel around the waist while burrowing his head into Cas’s abdomen.
“Yeah. He told me.”
Cas hugged his son close to him and ran his long fingers through Daniel’s hair.
“It’s okay Daniel. I’ll be home—“
“In the morning!” Charlie interrupted her friend. Both father and son turned to blink up at Charlie with big, blue eyes.
“What?” They asked simultaneously.
Charlie nodded and smiled brightly at the two Novaks. She swooped down and picked Daniel up by his underarms and she spun the child in circles, making him giggle wildly. She put him down on the floor again and turned back to Cas. She pointed at her friend and smiled again.
“You, my friend, will be staying out overnight!”
“Overnight? What do you mean overnight? Charlie—“ Castiel tried to protest, hands on his hips, until Charlie stopped him again.
“Uh-huh, me and Danny here will be staying up aaaallllllll night while you’re gone, watching a Lord of the Rings marathon!” Behind Charlie, Daniel threw his arms up into the air and cheered. Castiel, momentarily forgetting his annoyance with his friend, smiled at his son. This is the most lively the young father has seen his son for weeks. Castiel began to think that maybe Charlie was right and maybe this night out would be good for both him and his son.
And then Castiel remembers what Charlie said about him staying out until morning.
“Charlie,” he turned to his friend who was still smiling at him with her arms crossed against her chest, covering the emblem on her Captain Picard shirt. “Where in the world will I be staying overnight?”
His fire-haired friend shrugs and grabs Castiel by the shoulders, turning him around towards the front door. “I dunno Cas, if you don’t find someone to bunk with-“ she waggles her eyebrows suggestively,”-then treat yourself to a nice three star hotel. Or a four star motel, they’re pretty much the same thing. Treat yourself for a night!” As Charlie speaks she wanders around the entrance hall of the small house and gathers Castiel’s things. She grabs his wallet from a bowl on the table near the front door, and then yanks his trench coat from off the coat hanger. These items she shoves into his hands before swinging open the front door. She snatches his car keys from the aforementioned bowl near the door and hands them to him as well.
“Now get the hell out of here! Go have fun, go get a little tipsy, relax a little bit!” She leans in and whispers, so Daniel doesn’t hear; “Go get laid!” Cas can hear the excitement in her voice, regardless of how quietly she whispered.
With that said she begins to push him out the door. Castiel is too shocked to stop her from moving him, or protest in any other way.
“Wait!” Daniel pushes past his Aunt and jumps at his father, hugging him tightly around his waist. Cas hugs his baby boy back just as tightly before pulling his son away from him in order to get a good look at his son. He gives a gentle smile and brushes his son’s long, messy bangs from his forehead. He kisses Daniel’s cheek before speaking.
“Be good for your Aunt, alright Daniel?”
The child nods and smiles at Castiel brightly, surprising his father at his lack of protests to his leaving.
“I will Dad, I promise.”
“Good boy. And also, have fun, Busy Bee.”
Castiel releases his son, who runs back to stand next to Charlie on the front porch. They both wave him goodbye as he gets in his car, starts it up, and drives away.
About twenty minutes later, Castiel finds himself sitting in a bar whose name he already forgot, sipping from a beer he’s never heard of before.
‘What the hell am I supposed to do while I’m here anyways?’ He thinks to himself as he finishes his first drink. Once the last sip is swallowed, Cas feels his body relax the tiniest bit, and even that small amount is a huge relief. Sighing, the raven haired man orders himself another drink.
Slowly, his muscles begin to loosen and his ever-stiff posture melts into a more relaxed position. Instead of thinking about work, bills, money, debt, and being a single father, Cas thinks about… Well, anything else. He thinks about his favorite movies, his favorite books, his favorite childhood memories. Once he starts thinking about his childhood, he begins to think about his son’s childhood so far, and how different things would be now if he hadn’t been kicked out by his siblings. Or how different things would be if Dean had stuck around…
‘Dean,’ Castiel thinks, in a slightly drunken haze, having just finished his third beer in under an hour. ‘How long has it been since I’ve seen him…? Since graduation? Yes, that’s sounds right, but when was the last time we even spoke… Oh, that’s right. The day I told him about the pregnancy. Or was it the day I went into labor…? No no, don’t be an idiot Castiel,’ he chides himself in his head, ‘It’s not a conversation if he ignores you the entire time you speak. Or if his slutty girlfriend interrupts you by sucking on his face like her life depended on it…’ He thinks bitterly. He’s honestly surprised with how well he can remember that day, especially in his drunken state, just now putting a fourth beer to his lips.
Castiel sighs audibly, regretting having thought about that day, because now he can’t get Dean off of his mind.
‘He was so perfect, in every way. His spikey blonde hair, it was so soft, those few times I managed to feel it. His eyes, so green, so beautiful, so captivating. And his freckles… There were so many, and the way they danced when he laughed or smiled…’
As Castiel is thinking about the father of his child, he’s approached by a man at the bar.
“Hey there Beautiful, you look like you could use another beer.” The stranger says to Castiel, all charming smiles and bright eyes. Bright green eyes, Castiel notes, not unlike Dean’s. In fact, they looked nearly identical to Dean’s, but Castiel can’t be sure, what with how drunk he is. All he knows about this man is that, from what Cas can see through his drunken haze, he looks a lot like his old friend.
And he is more than okay with that.
“Sure,” he rasps in a slurred voice. He can tell by the way the man next to him stumbles into the empty stool beside Castiel’s own that he is just as drunk as Cas is, if not more so. His fifth beer arrives and is hardly sipped at before Green Eyes leans in close to Cas and whispers in his ear, in a husky tone that Cas can’t help but think sounds so familiar; “You wanna get outta here? Back to my place maybe?”
Castiel’s head moves almost of its own accord, giving the man an affirmative answer.
“Awesome,” Green Eyes breaths into the shell of Cas’s ear, causing the latter to shiver as he’s pulled from the bar, drinks paid for, and into the parking lot. They exchange names which are forgotten as quickly as they’re said.
Castiel gets into the car Green Eyes stops at, both getting in at their respective side and Castiel isn’t thinking logically at all. Like, how are they supposed to safely drive to Green Eye’s house with them both being as drunk as they are? Not to mention the fact that Castiel will be leaving his own car behind in the parking lot of this bar. Plus, how does Castiel even know if he can trust this man? How does this man even know if he can trust Castiel (of course, Cas won’t do anything, but this is something Green Eyes should be thinking about!)? Unfortunately for Cas, or fortunately he supposes, depending on how you look at things, the dark haired male is far too drunk and just a little bit too horny to be thinking any of the aforementioned worries.
In less than fifteen minutes they make it –safely, much to Castiel’s surprise and relief- to Green Eyes’ house.
Not ten minutes after that, both men are upstairs, half naked on a bed, moaning and groaning into sloppy, open-mouthed kisses, grinding against each other in an uncoordinated fashion.
About seven minutes after that and Cas is prepped, quickly and not-so-thoroughly, and roughly thirty seconds later, he’s being pounded into the mattress beneath him.
When both men reach orgasm, they each utter a name that the other is too drunk to register.
“Fuck! Cas…”
“Dean!”
Blearily, Cas opens his eyes. Looking around, he notices that he’s in an unfamiliar room, on a strange bed, surrounded by an even stranger, but not necessarily unwelcome, warmth. Despite his hangover-induced-headache, Castiel manages to come to the realization that the warmth around him is from the body that is pressed firmly against his back, a stray arm slung low across his waist.
Cas stiffens. Slowly, so as not to wake his bed partner, Castiel turns over to face the man whom he had dubbed last night as Green Eyes. When he turns to face him, to say Cas was surprised would be an understatement. Face to face, nose to nose, close enough for their breaths to mingle, holding Cas tight to his chest in his sleep, is Dean Winchester.
Dean Winchester.
Dean. Winchester.
“Dean…?” Castiel gasps quietly. Not quietly enough it would seem, as Dean shuffles slightly, mumbling into his pillow.
“Hush Cas, m’tryin’ to sl’p.”
Castiel waits with baited breath, to see if Dean caught his own words.
Bright green eyes snap open and Dean lets out a very manly little scream before tumbling out of his bed. Sitting up and looking over his bed, Dean glances at Cas, unsure; as if he thinks Castiel is some figment of his imagination that will just disappear suddenly. Blinking numerous times and rubbing his eyes, Dean gets to his knees, looks back at Cas and utters a shaky sounding, “Cas?”
“Hello Dean.” Cas says gently.
Dean’s eyes are wide as he scrambles back onto the bed, blushing and covering himself once he realizes how much he isn’t wearing. Once under the blankets, Dean looks back at Cas.
“Is that… Is it really you? You’re not a dream?” He asks in disbelief.
“No, I’m not a dream Dean. It’s really me. And I’m sorry Dean, but I really should go home—“
“No! Wait! I-I mean, do you have to go now? Like, now now?” Dean gives Cas a large pair of puppy eyes, bright green and begging, and Cas is sure he learned that from Sam. Either that or its genetics; Cas’s son certainly knows how to turn on the puppy dog eyes when he wants something.
Castiel heaves a sigh, running a hand through his already messy hair.
“What about-about what happened, ya know, last night? Aren’t we gonna talk about it?”
“Dean I’m sorry but, if I had been sober enough to realize it was you flirting with me and not just some man that looked like you, I wouldn’t have done… any of this.” Cas refuses to make eye contact with Dean as he speaks.
“Wait, so you admit that you only slept with me because you thought I wasn’t me, but someone that looked like me?” Cas lifts his head to look at Dean now, tilting his head to the side and biting on his chapped, lower lip.
“Well, when you put it like that it just sounds confusing…”
Dean points at him with a grin on his face.
“But you admit it.” He states.
Cas sighs again.
“Yes.” Dean gives a relieved sounding sigh beside Castiel before speaking.
“Good. Me too,” he says, blushing –in a very manly way, mind you- at his own confession.
Cas gives him a puzzled look, not entirely sure what he means.
“You too, what?” He asks, head still tilted to the side, looking at Dean through his dark lashes.
Dean rubs the back of his neck and looks away awkwardly. He clears his throat.
“I just mean, like, I only flirted with you because… I was too drunk to see clearly, and, well, thought it was some guy that looked like you…” Dean looks at Cas quickly, adding hastily, “Not that I wouldn’t have flirted with you if I had known it was you, because I totally would have!”
An awkward silence fills the room. Castiel looks at his lap, where his hands have curled around each other, while Dean watches Cas, tilting his head and bending forward in an attempt to see Cas’s incredible, beautiful, gorgeous blue eyes.
“I should leave, Dean…” Cas whispers, glancing up at the green eyed man through black lashes.
The emotion on Dean’s face is somewhere between understanding and heartbreak, and it makes Castiel feel like a monster, but he has a son to care for! He can’t be bothered to rekindle some relationship/friendship/whatever-the-hell it was he and Dean had had between them all those years ago! Besides that, Castiel is still bitter and mistrustful towards Dean from his rejection of Castiel and their child more than eight years prior. Trying to work something out now would just be… too much.
“Yeah… Yeah, okay. Just uhm, let me get something real quick, okay? I’ll just…” Dean grabs his boxers from off the floor in front of him without dislodging the blanket covering his lower half, slips them on, and practically sprints out his bedroom door, his left shoulder bumping into the door frame harshly.
Castiel, now alone in Dean’s room, can hear Dean mumbling and cussing about from the hall about “fuckin’ door frames” and “where the hell’s a goddamn pen when you need one?” As Dean continues fumbling around in the rest of his home, Castiel gets dressed. Or at least, he puts on his own pair of boxers and slips on his dress shirt. Dean comes back into the room as Castiel finishes buttoning up his shirt.
Dean holds something out to Cas, looking away as he does.
“Here’s my number. Maybe we can get some coffee sometime? If you want to, I mean.” He mumbles into his shoulder.
Slowly, the darker haired male reaches a tentative hand forward and takes the slip of paper from Dean’s hand.
“Oh,” he says quietly. “You mean, like a date…?” Because if so, Castiel is most certainly going to decline.
“No! Nonononono. Not at all! Just so we can catch up, ya know? It’s been so long since we last talked, so I thought it’d be nice, I dunno.” Dean replies. He stands there awkwardly for a moment before looking Cas up and down and saying, “I called a taxi for you. It can take you home, and don’t worry about paying it, I gotcha covered.”
“That is very kind,” Cas gives Dean a small smile. “But I’m afraid I must return to the bar for my car. What was that place called again…?”
Dean blinks at Castiel a few times.
“The Roadhouse?”
Cas has the decency to look surprised.
“Is that where we were?” He stands now, beginning to put on his previously discarded clothing.
Dean snorts.
“How did you not know where you were? You used to freakin’ work there man!”
“I know that!” Cas rolls his eyes. “I didn’t really process it at the time, and my working there didn’t really help me remember. I was only there for about five or six months, and those months I was not overly fond of, as I’m sure you could imagine…” Cas trails off, realizing that he just mentioned his past pregnancy in Dean’s presence.
There’s a look that Castiel is unable to place that flashes across Dean’s face, and when the latter opens his mouth to speak, a car horn sounds from outside.
“Oh. The uh, the taxi’s here, in case you couldn’t already tell.” Dean says in a dejected tone of voice.
“Ah, yes. Right, well, thank you. For calling the taxi, I mean.” Cas pauses before continuing. “And for your number, I suppose.” Dean smiles at the now fully clothed man before him as Castiel gathers the remainder of his scattered items and checks to make sure he has his keys and wallet.
Dean walks Cas to the door and watches as he walks towards the waiting taxi.
“I’ll see you around?” It’s poised as a question more than a statement.
Cas just gives another small smile. It doesn’t quite reach his eyes.
Dean watches the taxi as it drives away, staring at the back of Cas’s head until the cab turns a corner and his view is blocked.
After Castiel is dropped off at the bar, the fare having already been paid for, he reaches his car. He’s pleasantly surprised to find it unbroken in to, and not vandalized in the least bit. He gets into his vehicle, starts the car, and drives home.
“Charlie, I’m home!” Castiel calls into his house once he enters. He closes the door behind him and kicks his shoes off into a corner in the front entry hall as he hears footsteps from the hall behind him. They get closer and faster, and soon enough, Castiel finds himself with an armful of seven year old.
“Dad!” Daniel yells, being picked up by his father into a large hug. Castiel holds his son tightly to him as he recalls who he just spent the night with…
Ridding himself of such thoughts for now, Castiel kisses the side of his son’s head.
“Hello Busy Bee,” he says affectionately.
“Hey hot-stuff!” Charlie greets once she comes into view. She has a mixing bowl in her hands and batter all over her apron, and from the smell of it, is in the middle of making pancakes.
“Hello Charlie.” He gives her a tight smile, and she gives him a worried look in return. She gives him a once-over.
“You look… well rested.” She finishes awkwardly.
“Oh, very.” He replies irritably. Castiel turns to his son, whom is standing to his right and clutching tightly to his hand.
“Daniel,” he begins softly, “Why don’t you go get washed up while I help your Aunt finish breakfast, hm?”
“Okay Dad!” Daniel says cheerily before speeding off in the direction of the bathroom.
“No running in the house!” Immediately he hears the running cease and the footsteps slow to a walk. Castiel smiles.
“Soooo…?” Charlie prods once they enter the kitchen.
Cas leans heavily against the kitchen counter and rubs his eyes tiredly.
“I cannot believe I let you talk me into going out last night!” he groans, rubbing his hands down his face, looking utterly defeated.
“Ooookay. That doesn’t sound good. What happened?” Castiel’s head snaps up at his friend’s question and she can see a plethora of different emotions cross over his face; confusion, anger, fear, sadness, and was that a small glimmer of hope she saw?
“You want to know what happened?” He hissed, his shoulders hunched and his posture stiff.
“Well I’ll tell you what happened; I slept with Dean Winchester!” This he whispered angrily, because God forbid his seven year old walk in on this conversation and begin asking questions.
Charlie stares at her friend, not entirely registering what she was just told. However, when it all clicks in her head she blurts out the first thing that comes to her mind.
“Holy shit!”
Castiel gives her a heated glare before glancing behind him to see if Daniel is there listening.
“Would you please be quiet? I don’t need my son hearing that kind of language. Or any of this conversation, for that matter!”
Charlie just shakes her head, her eyes wide in disbelief.
“Dean Winchester? You mean the Dean Winchester? As in, Danny’s other father, Dean Winchester? That Dean Winchester?”
“Yes that Dean Winchester! Who else could I possibly be talking about?” He whispers lowly.
His friend gives him another once-over. She looks back up at him with worry in her eyes.
“Are you okay?” She asks sincerely.
Castiel runs his hands through his hair, making it messier than it already is.
“I… I suppose I’m alright. I will admit, it certainly was awkward in the morning, and he made it worse by giving me this.” He hands her the slip of paper Dean had given to him earlier and she glances over it.
“His number?” She gasps.
“Mhmm,” he replies, pulling a chair out form the kitchen table and slumping down into it. He cradles his head in his hands and stares at the off-white color of his kitchen table.
Charlie sits down across from him and slides the paper back across the table top. Castiel places one hand over the paper once it’s in front of him, but continues to look down at the table.
“You know Cas,” Charlie starts awkwardly, “this doesn’t have to be a bad thing.”
Castiel glances back up at her, his eyes showing his disbelief at what she was saying.
“I mean, he’s reaching out to you, right? That can’t be a bad thing!”
“How can this not be a bad thing, Charlie? He abandoned me when I needed him most and now he wants back in my life? It’s not that simple! And then there’s Daniel to think about…”
Charlie nods, seeing her friend’s points, but she still has more to say on the matter herself.
“This guy is Danny’s other father, Cas. You don’t think he deserves to know his kid? Or that Danny should get to know his father?”
Castiel looks livid by now, and throughout all seven years she has known him, Charlie has never seen her friend this angry before than he is in this moment. Castiel pushes his chair back and stands up before he begins to yell.
“I’m his father! Is that not enough anymore?! As soon as Dean Winchester shows back up, all of my efforts towards raising my son means nothing?! I should just forget everything Dean Winchester has done to hurt me and allow him to be close to my only child?! God, he probably doesn’t even remember that he got me pregnant in the first place, as soon as I remind him that I am still raising our child he’ll turn tail and run! Why should I even think of giving that son of a bitch a second chance?!” At the end of his mini-rant, Castiel is breathing heavily and realizes with a start that at some point, he had begun to cry.
“Jesus…” He whispers hoarsely, falling back into his chair and hiding his face as he wipes away his tears.
Charlie sits across from him still, in shock at her friend’s anger and what it was he had to say.
“Cas—“ she tries to start, but another voice cuts her off.
“Daddy?” Both adults look to the entrance of the kitchen to find Daniel standing there, his blue eyes filled with tears and worry as he looks at his father.
“Oh, sweetheart, come here.” Cas turns in his chair until he’s facing his son and opens his arms. Daniel makes his way quickly to where his father sits and settles into his dad’s embrace.
“How much did you hear, Danny?” Charlie asks quietly.
“I heard everything after you said the bad word, Aunt Charlie.” Daniel had his face buried in his father’s shoulder, mumbling his words into Castiel’s tan trench coat.
Castiel sighed before pulling his son’s face away from his chest.
“Do you want to talk about what you heard, Daniel?”
Daniel looks unsure when his father asks this question, but after a few moments pause, he nods his head.
“I was just… I was wondering if I could meet him, my other dad?” ‘Again,’ the seven year old thinks in his head.
Castiel looks at his son for a long moment before giving his answer rather reluctantly and with much difficulty.
“… I suppose I could call him at some point to discuss… everything.” His voice is strangled with worry, fear, and caution.
Daniel smiles at his dad and snuggles back into his chest, hugging his dad tightly in an attempt to show his father that meeting with Dean will not make him love Castiel any less.
“Thanks Dad. I love you.”
Castiel holds his son as close as possible, kissing his baby’s head gently. Another onslaught of tears threatens him, so he clenches his eyes tightly and presses his face into his son’s unruly hair.
“I love you, too, Daniel. So much.” Charlie, now feeling out of place, silently takes her leave, gathering her things and slipping out the front door unnoticed.
It isn’t until about five weeks after he and Dean had had sex that Castiel decides it would be a good idea to try and get ahold of him. In all honestly, Cas was probably going to put off contacting Dean for a few more months, at least. But the small plastic stick with the little pink plus on it has other ideas, it seems.
“I can’t believe it…” Castiel whispers to himself in disbelief. He’s sitting on the closed toilet lid, holding his head in one hand, pregnancy test –positive pregnancy test- held tightly in the other.
“I cannot believe this is happening again… I’m having Dean’s child. Again.” Cas shakes his head before standing up, tossing the test into the trash bin and exiting the bathroom.
He has to make sure he really is pregnant before he goes and tells everyone. He has to make an appointment with a doctor, or a specialist, or someone. So, picking up his phone, he dials the number of his “regular” doctor. “Regular” because he can only afford to visit his doctor once a year, if he’s lucky. ‘Stupid insurance being too damn expensive,’ he thinks to himself. ‘At least Daniel has good insurance. Free insurance, maybe, but it’s still just as good as the expensive ones advertised on the television!’
“Ah, hello,” Castiel begins once he hears someone pick up and read off the name of the hospital. “Yes, I would like to make an appointment with my doctor, Ms. Pamela Barnes? This is Castiel Novak… An opening tomorrow at 1:30? Yes, please, that would be wonderful… Thank you, have a lovely day… Yes, goodbye.” He hangs up the phone after his appointment is set up, thankfully while Daniel will still be at school, and glances up at the clock. 2:53? Time to pick his son up from school.
The next day, after he drops his son off at school, Cas calls in sick for work and at roughly 1:15 in the afternoon, Castiel is waiting for his name to be called in the waiting room of the hospital. Once his name is called –and mispronounced, as per usual. Seriously, Cass-teal? Really?- everything happens quickly. He and Doctor Barnes make small talk and she asks what he came in for. He explains and she takes some blood samples; it’s all very underwhelming. Before he leaves and as she packs away his samples, she tells him that they’ll be calling him tomorrow with the results. They say their goodbyes, and the only thing Castiel can think of once he’s driving back home is how he has enough time to take a nap before picking his son up from school.
The following morning, after having thrown up three times since waking and then making his son a small batch of pancakes before school, Castiel receives a phone call from his doctor.
“Hello?” He picks up on the third ring, holding the hand-held phone up to his ear as he watches his son struggle to pour a heavy jug of orange juice.
“Yes, Castiel Novak?” Walking over to his son, he takes the jug and pours him a glass, ruffling his son’s bed-head after capping the jug and placing it back in the fridge.
“Speaking.”
“Well Cas, I have the results of your blood tests and it shows that you are indeed pregnant.”
Well. Fuck.
“Alright. Thank you, goodbye.” He assumes he’s in too much shock at the moment to really register what’s being said, but as he goes to hang up the phone, his doctor calls his name.
“That’s all you have to say?!” She asks incredulously. “We should talk about what you’re going to do--!”
He interrupts her by responding with, “I already know what I will be doing. I will keep this child and raise this child like I did with my son. I will make regular appointments to check up on this child and I will take the vitamins necessary to keep this child healthy. Because this is my child and I already love him or her unconditionally. So thank you, Doctor Barnes, for the information and your concern, but as I’m sure you can tell by now, this is not my first time doing this. Goodbye for now.” Castiel hangs up now, not having realized that his empty hand had moved down to rest protectively over his still smooth abdomen.
“… Dad?” He turns to look at his son who he realizes won’t be his only child for much longer.
“Yes, Busy Bee?”
“Who was on the phone, and why were you talking about a kid? Were you talking about me?” Cas runs a hand through his hair and sits beside his son at the table.
“No, sweetheart, I wasn’t talking about you. I was talking to a doctor about the baby I’m going to be having in a few months.” Castiel waits for this information to sink in for his son.
“… A baby?”
Cas nods. “A baby. You’re going to be a big brother in seven to nine months.” Cas smiles softly at his son, reaching forward to pet his dark hair in an attempt to tame it and comfort Daniel at the same time.
“I’m gonna be a big brother?!” Daniel jumps out of his seat, a large smile on his face as he does so.
Castiel chuckles warmly. “You certainly are.”
“Awesome!” Daniel cheers, dancing around the kitchen while rambling about how he’ll be the best brother ever! He’ll share all of his things, he’ll be super nice to the baby, even if it cries and wakes him up, and he’ll beat up anyone who’s mean to his little brother or sister (“Only I’ll be allowed to be mean to them!”)!
Cas is just relieved Daniel took it so well. He can only hope Dean’s reaction will be half as enthusiastic.
To say Dean was surprised when Castiel called him nearly six weeks after their little… reunion, would be an understatement.
“Hello?” Dean answers when he hears his cell phone ring.
“Hello, Dean.”
Dean pulls the phone from his ear and stares at it with wide, unblinking eyes. He quickly realizes what he’s doing and pulls the phone back against his ear.
“Cas!” He bellows into the phone, cringing once he registers how loud that was and how relieved he sounds.
Dean hears a low chuckle from Castiel’s end of the line and he feels a sudden warmth in his chest at the sound.
“You called! I didn’t think you would, man. I mean, six weeks is a long time!” Dean smiles into the phone, not even caring how pathetic he sounds.
“Yes, I… apologize. Some things came up and…” Castiel heaves a sigh that makes a loud crackle noise in Dean’s ear.
“Dean, we need to talk. Would you care to meet me at the coffee shop by nearest the Roadhouse? You know which one I’m talking about?”
No one is surprised when Dean jumps at the chance to see Cas again. “Yeah, I’d love to! Do you wanna meet tomorrow or…?”
“No, actually. I think as soon as possible would be better. If you don’t mind, of course?”
“No man, I can be there in like, an hour?” Dean hears Cas let out a breath that Dean assumes he was holding in.
“Yes, an hour. That would be perfect. I’ll see you there.”
“Yeah, see you soon, Cas.” Castiel hangs up his phone and Dean doesn’t even register how rude that was. He’s too happy that he’s going to see Cas again!
A little more than an hour later and Dean enters the cozy little coffee shop. Immediately, near the back of the shop, Dean spots the tan trench coat and the messy, dark hair. He heads back towards Cas, a grin that he can’t seem to wipe off stretched across his face. When reaching the table he pulls out his chair before greeting Cas.
“Hey Cas,” he smiles across the table. Castiel gives him a small smile back, replying with “Hello, Dean” like he normally does when greeting his old friend.
“Soooo…? You wanted to talk?” Cas nods solemnly before reaching for something in his pocket and pulling it out. Before Dean can see what it is, Castiel begins to speak.
“I’m just going to come out and say it; Dean, I’m pregnant.” He passes the object in his hand towards the stunned blonde, and Dean sees what it is now; a sonogram picture. You can’t see much, but it’s enough to be able to see that something is there. And that ‘something’ seems to be a baby. Dean’s baby, if Cas is telling the truth.
“You’re… Huh?” Dean asks stupidly. Castiel sighs and Dean can see him pull his trench coat tighter across his body.
“I’m pregnant, and it’s yours,” Castiel says quietly, looking down at the grainy black and white photo in his hand instead of up at Dean.
Dean’s mouth feels dry.
“How-how do you know it’s mine?” Castiel looks up then, squinting at Dean and tilting his head, just like Dean remembers.
“Because you are the only person I have slept with since… Well, since that party at Benny’s house more than eight years ago.” Dean stares at Castiel, most likely looking like a fish out of water, his mouth open and moving soundlessly as though gasping for air.
“I’m the only person you’ve ever slept with?” He blurts out with wide, green eyes. Blue eyes roll in exasperation.
“Yes, you are, but that’s hardly what you should be so concerned about right now.”
“You’re right!” Dean all but yells out. “You’re absolutely right. I should be concerned that every time we have sex, you get knocked up.” Cas gives him a withering look, but Dean just smiles back at him.
“Have you already gone to a doctor?” Dean scoffs at his own question before mumbling to himself, looking very contemplative. “Of course you have, you have a picture of the kid right there… Do you have enough rooms at your place for the baby? ‘Cause if not I could try to help you find a bigger place, and—“
Cas puts up a hand to stop Dean’s ramblings.
“Why are you asking all of these questions?” Cas asks guardedly.
“Well…” Dean suddenly seems bashful. “I wanna do what I didn’t do the last time this happened Cas.” Dean locks his eyes with Cas’s. “I want to help you. And I want to be there for my kid. Our kid.”
Castiel closes his eyes tightly when he feels Dean’s hands gently hold his around the sonogram photo.
“You are serious about this, Dean?” Cas opens his eyes and Dean can see they shine with tears that are yet to be shed.
“Yeah. Yeah, I am. I really am.”
“I suppose I cannot deny you a place in this child’s life, but… I’m concerned for my son. And of course, I trust you as far as I could throw an elephant; which is to say, not at all.”
Dean feels his heart break at Cas’s words, but he also feels warm at the mention of the son Cas and Dean already have. Whom Dean has already met. But Cas doesn’t need to know that just yet.
“You don’t trust me, but you’ll let me into our kid’s life?”
“Of course. This child is as much yours as mine, and if you wish to be in his or her life, then I will not deny you the opportunity to know your child like you denied yourself the first time.” Cas doesn’t even flinch at the harsh words that roll off his tongue.
“And what about that? The first time, I mean. Our… our first kid, what about him?” Castiel looks away from Dean and glares harshly at the floor.
“If I could have it my way, Dean Winchester, I would not allow you to communicate with my son in any way. But… I trust Daniel enough to allow him a choice in this. I have told him about you a little bit, when he asks, so you aren’t an entirely foreign concept to him. I’ve even shown him some old pictures from when we were kids…” Cas trails off as he drags his gaze back from the floor.
Dean ducks his head to try and make eye contact with the man across from him.
“Cas, I’d love to meet him. If that’s okay with you?” Cas doesn’t reply. He merely nods his head. Dean smiles at him, even if Cas can’t see it.
“So, when would be a good time to get together?”
About three months later, once Castiel has finally dubbed Dean worthy enough to meet his son, Dean comes over to Cas’s house to officially meet Daniel. He knocks at the door and isn’t too surprised when Cas opens the door. What does surprise him, however, is the visible bump beneath Castiel’s rumpled tee shirt. Cas is just far along enough that you can tell he’s pregnant, not just carrying around some extra weight, but this shirt makes it even more obvious. Dean can see where the material of Castiel’s ‘I love pi’ shirt is pulled tighter across his belly, stretching the pi symbol that Dean suspects is right on top of where Cas’s belly button sits.
“Hello, Dean.” Cas opens the door more and steps aside to let Dean in.
“Hey Cas, you look good.” Dean smiles at Castiel, who’s cheeks turn pink as he turns his head away. “How’s Junior doin’?” Dean asks, looking down at Cas’s belly. It’s been about five months now, total, and Cas found out at his ultra sound appointment last week that they’re going to be having another baby boy.
Gently, Cas rest a hand over his stomach, covering the pi symbol under the palm of his hand and rubs in small circles. He smiles down at his bump.
“He’s doing well. I suspect he has the hiccups, however. He keeps making sudden movements, not a kick, but also not him squirming around to find a better position. He seems to be sleeping now, though.” Cas shakes his head and looks back up at Dean.
“He is… in the living room waiting, if you’d like to follow me.” As Dean follows Cas into the living room, Cas speaks again. “He’s been looking forward to meeting you, you know. He’s hardly eaten a thing all day, too anxious for your arrival.” They stand at the threshold of the living room and what Dean sees steals his breath away. There, sitting on the couch is the little boy from the pizza shop all those months ago. His son. His son, his and Cas’s.
“Daniel.” Castiel’s voice makes Dean jump slightly and causes the young boy to turn his head towards the two men.
Daniel smiles brightly and waves from the couch. “Hi Dad!”
The boy’s eyes shift from his pregnant father to the man beside him. Cautiously, Daniel stands up from his seat and moves towards the two; more specifically, towards Dean. He stops in front of Dean and looks up at him, squinting his eyes and tilting his head, looking eerily similar to his dark haired father.
“Uhm, hey Squirt.” Dean says awkwardly, not sure if the kid even remembers who he is or that they had met before.
“I thought you looked familiar in those pictures Dad showed me. You’re the guy from the pizza parlor; the one who ruffled my hair and said I was awesome.”
Dean was too scared to see Castiel’s reaction to that little tidbit of information.
“You two… have met?” The pregnant man asks in a tight voice.
Daniel smiles up at him and nods. “Uh-huh! Back in February!” He replies, putting emphasis on the ‘ru’ in February.
“That’s… nice.” Castiel says with barely concealed anger. Daniel just nods again, oblivious to his father’s anger, and smiles back up at Dean.
“So you’re my other Dad?” Dean doesn’t know what to say, so he just nods dumbly, staring down at his son with large eyes.
Daniel nods before a serious expression makes its way onto his face. "If you hurt my Dad or my little brother, I'll hurt you. Got it?" Dean nods, his eyes wide. Did his son just threaten him? Daniel smiles again. "Okay, now that you know that, back to more serious business!" He begins bouncing on his feet and continues smiling up at Dean. “What do I call you? Oh! Can I call you Dad?!” Just as Dean’s about to answer, Daniel says, “No, wait. That’d be confusing… I can call you… Father?” Dean opens his mouth again, but Daniel continues. “No, that’s too old-fashioned!”
Castiel places a hand on top of Daniel’s head and begins to speak. “Daniel-“ but he doesn’t seem to get much further than Dean.
“I know!” The little boy exclaims. “I can call you Pop!” He smiles up at Dean, who smiles back and nods his head.
“I like Pop.” He replies sincerely. Because really, it didn’t matter what his son wanted to call him, the fact that he wanted to call him anything in the first place is more than enough to warm Dean’s heart.
Daniel laughs and Dean swears he’s never heard a sound as wonderful as his child’s laughter. Daniel’s eyes sparkle as he laughs and Dean can’t help but chuckle along as well. From the corner of his eye, he sees Cas give a small smile as he watches them, rubbing a hand against his bump as his other hand rests against his lower back.
Daniel sees his father rub his belly and touches it himself.
“Is he kicking?” He asks, awe in his voice as his tiny hands sit beside Castiel’s much larger one. Cas hums a confirmation and Daniel smiles when Dean assumes he feels a soft thump beneath one of his hands.
“Wanna feel?” Daniel questions softly, not waiting for an answer before he grabs Dean’s hand and lays it across Castiel’s stomach. Dean’s hand is larger than Daniel’s, by far, and only slightly bigger than Castiel’s, but the three of them manage to fit one hand each on Castiel’s growing baby bump.
When Dean feels the baby kick against his palm he sucks in a shaky breath and wipes his hand down his face. It’s then that Dean realizes he’s started crying.
Cas looks up from where all of their hands rest on his stomach and looks Dean in the eyes, his own blue orbs swimming with tears as well. Both men look down when they feel Daniel remove his hand. The eight year old leans forward and pulls both adults close enough so that he’s able to hug them both at the same time. He rests his head against Dean’s lower abdomen and Dean rests his empty hand on top of his son’s downy hair.
The other hand still cradles Cas’s bump and Dean looks back up to Castiel when he feels the other male grab his hand within his own. They share a smile with each other, Dean’s grateful and apologetic for everything he’s done to hurt Castiel. Castiel’s however, is soft, forgiving (to an extent), and, dare Dean say it, loving.
A small voice breaks their eye contact.
“Does this mean we’re a family now?”
Dean gives Cas another smile, this one bigger and more eager at the very idea of this being his family, like they’re meant to be.
Castiel nods.
“Yes, Busy Bee. I suppose it does.”
~Five Years Later~
“Happy Birthday Dear Dmitri, Happy Birthday to you!”
A small boy with shaggy, dirty blonde hair blows out the candles on a large birthday cake and giggles when his Daddy presses a kiss to his cheek.
“Can I cut the cake?” The young boy’s older brother, Danny, asks their Papa, Dean.
“Sure, Squirt. Just be careful. Your Dad’ll kill me if you hurt yourself. Or ruin the cake.” His Papa grins at Danny, who yells out “Sweet!” before picking up the knife and cutting the first slice of cake. Everyone in the room claps when the first slice is presented to the birthday boy, who smiles up at his big brother from where he sits.
“Thank you DJ!” The now-five-year-old said cheerily.
“No problem, Demi. Happy birthday.” Danny smiled and ruffled his brother’s hair before continuing to cut the cake and hand out pieces. Everyone was there, Dmitri’s Daddy, his Papa, his big brother, his Uncle Sammy, his Grandpa and Nana, his Auntie Charlie and her girlfriend Gilda and his Uncle Gabriel (he didn’t want any of his Daddy’s other siblings here). Everything was perfect!
“Hey,” he hears his Papa call out gently. When he turns his head, he sees his Papa helping his Daddy get out of the seat next to him.
“Dean, I’m fine. I can get out of a chair on my own.” Dmitri giggles at his parents. Papa’s been really over-protective of Daddy since his tummy started getting bigger.
“Just let me take care of you Babe, alright?” His Daddy smiles up at Papa who grins back. His parents begin to lean in close to each other, and right as their faces are about to touch, hands cover Dmitri’s green eyes.
He hears Daniel fake gag behind him, before his brother, who’s covering his eyes, groans loudly.
“Come on, there are children present!” Dmitri hears his Papa’s booming laugh ring throughout the room before he’s being lifted from his chair by Dean himself.
He throws his arms around his Papa’s neck and hugs him tightly.
“Happy birthday, Kiddo.” His Papa says into his hair before kissing his forehead. The young boy sees his Daddy walk – more like waddle – over to where they’re standing and Cas kisses his nose.
“Yes, Honey Comb, happy birthday.”
Dmitri’s only response is a grin.