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“Mom, Dad,” Mako said as he laid the flowers on the shrine. “I’m gonna protect Bolin.”
Mako was eight, standing at the small placard that noted his parents’ shrine, a small grey piece of stone with his parents’ names engraved on a wooden placard.
One day, Mako was going to be rich enough to replace it. Until then, they had to make do with the paupers’s funeral placard.
But until then, Mako could only promise things.
Promise them he’d get a better memorial to them one day.
Promise them he’d take care of Bolin.
Promise that he’d try to be someone they’d be proud of.
All silent promises to the world, but ones that Mako would hold deep within him.
Mako’s wondering if he can quietly leave the wedding without anyone noticing — the painkillers he was on for his arm made him slightly more drowsy than normal. He could see Bolin on the dancefloor, as Mako sat on a table at the edge, but he couldn’t see Korra and Asami, unsure as to where they got to.
As far as weddings could go, Varrick’s wasn’t as terrible as one could have been, considering it was Varrick. After everything they went through these past few weeks, it was nice to have a break, even if he wasn’t sure Varrick actually deserved Zhu-Li.
Wu walked up to him and pulled at his right arm, removing Mako’s train of thought. Wu’s eyes were filled with a sparkle as he looked at Mako, as he closed the gap between him and Mako, his body flush to Mako’s good arm. “Hey Mako, could we talk? Again? I have more I want to say.”
Mako agreed with a nod. Despite the pain and the fatigue, Wu wasn’t poor company. In fact, Wu had a magnetic personality, which allowed for Mako to forget about the pain momentarily.
Mako followed Wu from the edge of the party to a small flower garden tended by the airbenders at the side of the temple. There were few lights but the yellow glow of lanterns hung on the temple, so they were illuminated by the moon and the orange light, the chatter of the Temple in the distance and far away.
“Mako! Sorry for stealing you away from your friends, I just needed to talk to you,” Wu said, and the King sat down on the bench. He slid his hands into his pockets, looking uncharacteristically unsure of himself.
“What’s up, Wu?” Mako asked, sitting beside him.
“I’ll be leaving in a day or so to Ba Sing Se. The job offer is still available, but I don’t want to force you to go.”
Mako exhaled. “My life is here, Wu. I… can’t leave Republic City. I don’t want to,” he finished, tone resolute.
Wu nodded. “I thought so. But how’s your arm? Are you going to be okay in Republic City!? All alone?” Wu asked.
Mako nodded. “It’s just an injured arm. I’ll be fine. I’ll be back on the beat in no-time,” he said, deflecting the concern from Wu. He wasn’t sure what Wu meant by being alone. It’s not like Wu would take care of his arm for him, anyway. “Well, maybe you should take a break instead. You deserve it! Treat yourself,” Wu said, and then fished out a small box to Mako. “I have this for you.”
He pressed the small box to Mako, who opened it. Small gold cuff links, with an Earth and fire symbol engraved onto a small gold circlet, sitting side by side. They were stunning, both delicate yet sturdy. The gold was likely solid, and Mako didn’t want to think about the price.
Mako rarely enjoyed receiving presents, especially items this extravagant, but these were something that he actually liked. Something Wu had clearly put thought into when gifting them to Mako.
“Thank you, Wu. They’re beautiful. But why?”
“They’re to say thank you for being such an excellent bodyguard.”
“I let you get kidnapped.”
Wu waved his hand in the air and laughed. “What’s a little kidnapping between friends?” The statement made Mako smile. Wu touched his shoulder gently. “I learnt a lot from you, Mako.” Wu retracted his touch, Mako feeling a little bare as Wu then pulled at the sleeves of his suit and he glanced over at Mako. “Mako, can I trust you with a secret?” He asked, his voice quiet, unusually serious.
“Yes,” he said. Calling Wu a friend wasn’t something he would have called Wu all those months ago, but recently over this past month he’d allowed himself to get closer to the Prince.
Wu chewed his lip. “I’m gay,” Wu said. “I wanted you to know.”
“But you flirt with women,” Mako replied, without thinking to stop himself as his brain caught up with him because that’s insensitive, dumbass. You know that isn’t how it works. But it was an instinctive response. How could he know Wu was gay?
Wu swallowed and fiddled his fingers together. “Yeah. That’s what I’m meant to do.”
There was a heavy pause, and Wu looked away. Mako cleared his throat. “Okay. That’s okay, Wu,” he said, sucking up the queasiness that he felt inside him. “I don’t think of you any differently,” he said more firmly, to drive the point home that no, he didn’t hate Wu.
“Right,” Wu said, and sucked in a breath, and he looked embarrassed but he straightened up, hands dropping to his side as he locked his gaze with Mako, “and, well, I like you.”
Mako stood there for a second, two seconds, three seconds more, before swallowing, as his stomach twisted into knots. “Oh.”
Wu looked at him and then wrung his hands together again. “I’m guessing that you don’t feel the same.”
Mako swallowed, then shook his head. “I’m sorry, Wu.”
“No, it’s fine! It’s fine. I guessed it was a long shot. I just couldn’t go back to Ba Sing Se saying nothing,” Wu said, he said, his voice quick and his breath hasty. “Can I… trust that you will be discreet?” He asked again.
That was a question he could answer with no hesitation. “Of course, Wu.”
Wu smiled a little. “So, moving on, can we still be friends?”
Wu looked nervous, and although the whole situation was very weird, it made him feel mostly sorry for Wu. “Wu, we’re friends. This doesn’t change anything,” he said. He fumbled around the cuff link box in his hand, though. “I, do you want these back?”
“No, they’re for you, because you improved my life, Mako, and you’re my friend. The rest doesn’t matter,” Wu said, and his previously neutral face broke into a smile. Wu clapped his hands together. “So, let’s go back to the dance floor,” he said, and pulled Mako back to the crowd, though Mako left him dance alone. He caught Wu looking over at him momentarily, but Mako wouldn’t dance with anyone, let alone with Wu — not after tonight’s awkwardness. After that, Wu had disappeared, leaving his scarf on a seat by Mako.
Mako sat at the table, accompanied by Lin before she too said her goodbyes, and later Varrick, who was just as grating as Mako remembered, even if Varrick was trying to bury the hatchet. After Zhu-Li dragged her husband away, Mako relished in the silence and fatigue washed over him again; his arm aching from the scars that crossed his left arm. He said his goodbyes to Bolin, and Bolin explained that Korra had briefly said that she and Asami were going on a trip together to the spirit world.
Wu had left the scarf beside Mako. Mako didn’t want Wu to lose it, so he skirted around the floor to find out where Wu was.
He eventually spotted a figure off in the same garden Wu had dragged him to earlier, and Mako encroached slowly as he realised he could hear sobs.
“Get it together, Wu. It doesn’t matter. It was a long shot. You knew this, you knew this,” he can hear a shaky voice say, the voice stumbling over the words.
Mako felt his stomach flip, and regret pooled through him.
But what could Mako do? What could he say to make Wu feel better, since it was obvious that how he felt was because of him?
Mako backed away to the dance floor and handed the scarf to Lin, and asked him to give it to Wu.
Best put distance between themselves — he couldn’t be anything to Wu other than a friend, and he had to make that clear.
He ignored the twisting feeling in his stomach and tried to forget the day’s events as he went back to his room in the Air Temple to rest.
The sound of Wu’s crying lingered in his mind, but he pushed it out of his mind.
Mako couldn’t help Wu because Mako didn’t like men, he couldn’t like Wu.
He retired for the night and tried to forget the day’s events.
Bolin had a black eye, from angering a triad member too much with his sunny attitude when the middle-aged man was in a bad mood. One backhanded slap later had left Bolin crying and Mako ushering him out the door to make sure his loud sobs didn’t make anyone else more agitated to react again.
Mako had ushered them to the park, making sure they’d stay clear of the triads tonight. The afternoon was pleasant with a cool breeze amongst the warm, spring air, but they couldn’t enjoy it. Bolin sniffled, and Mako felt sympathetic as he sat Bolin by a tree and Mako left to go to the nearest ice cream man, handing out cones.
“Hey, could I have an ice bag please?” Mako asked, offering a tentative, practiced smile as he shuffled from foot to foot.
The vendor considered him with some caution, and Mako expected to be refused, as was often the case with most persons and street kids. But the vendor turned behind him, rummaging around in the ice and Mako’s spirits rose, before the man returned to hand Mako a small cotton sack of ice.
“Thank you,” Mako said, and the ice cream man shrugged as Mako stepped away as a family moved from behind him. He took a few of the larger ice cubes and used his bending to slice them into smaller, more manageable sizes to be pressed against Bolin’s eye.
“Mommy, Daddy, I want berries ice cream,” the young girl said to the Mom, whilst the father bounced a baby in his arms.
“Of course,” the Mom said. There was some muttering between the parents as Mako focussed on slicing the ice, before he heard a voice speak up clearer, “Would you like one boy?”
Mako looked up, surprised to see the Dad speaking to him, eyes kind. He couldn’t see any reason to not accept, even if Mako would usually be wary of any stranger’s intentions. “Uh, honeycomb please.”
The father smiled and purchased one caramel ice cream. “Thank you,” Mako said as Mako was handed the ice cream by the father. They only smiled at him as Mako hesitated, but it appeared they only wanted to buy him a treat. Mako thought it was slightly strange they were being so nice, but with Mako’s dishevelled clothes and asking a vendor for some free ice probably gave away that Mako was poor. Mako was only nine, but he knew he looked poor compared to everyone else.
Mako walked back the ice cream to Bolin at the tree, who had stopped sniffling.
“Your favourite,” Mako said, and Bolin’s face lit up as he handed Bolin the ice cream.
“Wow, you bought this?” Bolin asked as he licked the treat, the pain forgotten as Mako pressed the ice bag to Bolin’s eye.
“Someone gifted it,” Mako said, And Bolin just grinned and said a ‘thanks’ aloud as Mako tended to Bolin’s eye.
Mako turned his head back to the family as they walked past, not noticing Mako and Bolin huddled by the tree. Not for the first time, a wishful feeling washed over him as Mako considered what he and his brother didn’t have.
That family walking by was what happiness was. A Mom and a Dad with a house and stability, who could love their kids and do nice things for other kids around them. Whilst Mako’s entire world was broken and could never be whole like them.
Mako’s thoughts were disturbed as Bolin shoved the ice cream in his face.
“Your turn,” Bolin said to Mako, smile wide.
Mako took a bite of the ice cream, and Bolin giggled happily, the misery of the day dissipating with the actions of kind strangers.
And then Korra and Asami returned from their vacation in the spirit world.
Together.
As in, romantically.
He was thrown for a loop. One minute they’re fighting, the next Korra is fussing over Asami and they’re kissing.
His mind went blank. One, did he drive his two ex girlfriends together?
Mako thinks about it. Asami was bisexual. Korra wrote Asami the letter and not anyone else. Asami and Korra had spent a lot of time together recently, and traded a lot of glances with each other.
Actually, how did he ever miss it?
Two, they seem far too relaxed about it. Soft smiled and easy going as everyone wished their congratulations. Like they hadn’t a care in the world.
But Mako was cool with it. He even said so. It didn’t weigh on his mind at all.
Mako sucked it up and helped Korra and Asami through the crises that affected the city. He reminded himself that he was glad that the two most important women in his life are happy, and happy together.
They were a good couple. They only made Mako want to strive to have that sort of relationship one day.
He doesn’t remember his parents bringing it up.
Why would they? They didn’t know anyone like that. It’s not like Mako and Bolin were asking about relationships at that age. Sometimes kids would play kiss chase on the playground and Mako would evade those sorts of games like the plague.
Mako promised himself at his parents’ graves he would protect Bolin no matter what. And it was up to Mako now to answer all the questions Bolin would throw at him.
Mako’s memories fade after that, when Bolin, aged nine, comes rushing home late one night.
“Mako, did you know?” He said, and shook his brother strongly.
“Know what, Bolin?” he grumbled as he rubbed sleep dust from his eyes. Something had gotten him all excited and now Mako would bet he wouldn’t sleep now.
“Did you know that guys can marry guys and girls can marry girls and stuff?”
“What? Yes,” Mako said. “Why is this important?”
“I didn’t know you could do that.”
“Well, you can,” Mako said, shrugging.
“And I also know now that some people are girls and boys, but they were told they weren’t and some aren’t either—“
“—Yeah, Bo, I know,” Mako said, exasperated. “Who told you this?”
“Well, Xing-Li and Kiki who we used to know from the streets have a room now and they live together now and kiss and stuff and they bumped into me and gave me food,” Bolin said, then pulled out some pork buns excitedly.
“That’s nice of them,” Mako said.
“Why didn’t you tell me, Mako?”
“What?”
“About marrying boys and stuff.”
“Well, I dunno,” Mako said, wishing Bolin would drop it, and uncomfortable feeling stirring within him.
“Can I do that?” Bolin asked.
Mako paused and eventually nodded. “If you want to,” he said. “But some people don’t like it.”
“They don’t like what?”
“Marrying someone if you’re a boy and you’re a boy.”
“Well whyyyyyyyy not? Xing-Li said love is love!”
“I don’t know Bolin!” Mako snapped back. He knew what the triad members said, and they’d said some disparaging comments. The thought of it made Mako uncomfortable, like something was crawling deep inside him. He didn’t really know why, when Bolin was so relaxed about the whole thing. “It’s weird I guess.”
“I don’t think it’s weird, I think it’s cool,” Bolin said, and then he pulled out a mother bag. “And we have some papayas!”
And after they dropped the conversation after that, as a shopkeeper came and shooed them away from the alleyway and they walked back to their favourite underpass.
Whatever happened, Mako would protect Bolin, whatever choices Bolin made. That’s what he promised his parents, and that’s what he’d do.
Mako hadn’t done a great job of forgetting the events of the wedding. The sound of Wu’s sobs and the sight of Wu hunched over haunted his mind whenever he saw the prince. Which was a lot since Wu was the abdicating King and was all over the newspapers, and Wu wrote to him.
When Mako returned home from work some days, he would find that he would receive a letter, which he’d take to his room to read with a cup of fresh tea. Wu’s letters were long, detailed and flowery, and he told Mako everything that was happening in Ba Sing Se and his work to democratise the Earth Kingdom — no easy feat.
The various letters would contain the following;
… I can’t believe Korra and Asami are dating. I had no idea! Those two make a beautiful couple. Clearly that’s why we didn’t work out, because they were already too interested in each other (if we were speaking in real life, Mako, I would laugh as it was a joke, and you’d know why we wouldn’t work out). How are you taking it, Mako?…
... It’s been a few weeks since I arrived, and I find I missed Ba Sing Se, but I also miss Republic City. My new bodyguard is named Koko. She is a tall earthbender, and she frightens me, honestly! But she seems very good at what she does. Though I don’t think she can replace you…
…. I wonder sometimes if I’m doing the right thing. Everyone argues all the time about the direction of the new democracy, and every state wants different things when they’re formalising the borders between them. But then I wonder if the monarchy would really help fix these things, as they’ve always been there and nothing gets done. I want the states to govern themselves and fix themselves.
And Mako would do his best to reply, but putting pen to paper was difficult for Mako. The words didn’t flow from him like Wu — the aching difference between them clear. His writing looked like chicken scratch compared to Wu’s delicate lines.
But, when he wrote, Wu always replied. He didn’t seem to mind Mako’s short responses:
…Hope you’re okay Wu… The weather is really warm here, light jacket type weather… Work is hard. I work on triad investigations most of the time. I try to keep busy… Yes, I am happy for Korra and Asami…
These sorts of conversations continued for two months until Wu dropped a curve-ball.
…. I have a date. An actual, real life, not-a-fantasy date! The date shall be with the son of one of the new advisors to me. His name is Hyuk, and he is really cute honestly; he has these exquisite big beautiful eyes and long curly hair and a glorious smile to match! A part of me feels scared. I’ve never gone on a proper date before like a normal person. I hope I don’t mess it up. And we’re going to be discreet, of course.
It’s weird. This is what I wanted my whole life, what I’ve hidden my whole life, and now I’m getting it and I don’t know what to do on a date. But I hope it goes well!
Mako rolled his eyes at Wu’s excitement rolling off the page. It was endearing. He and Wu hadn’t much chance to talk about Wu’s dating life before he disappeared back to Ba Sing Se. Of course, Wu hadn’t been on a date before. How could he have been?
Mako assured Wu through his own words.
Good luck on your date. You’ll be fine. Just be yourself. You’re charming enough as you are now.
He grimaced as he read over the last sentencing again, heat rising to his cheeks. Why did he write that!?
Mako took out another sheet and penned down his thoughts again, leaving out the charming part.
He sent it to Wu, and hoped that Wu would have a successful first date, even if there was an unknowing queasiness.
When Mako is thirteen, they’re doing more and more work for the triads. It’s becoming a part of their daily routine.
“You two, take Bai his money and tell him he better have the new cars fixed and ready to go by tomorrow. and scram quickly because you don’t want him to catch you,” Shin said, bellowing out a light beside him.
“What’s wrong with Bai?” Bolin said curiously. “He usually gives us food.”
“Bai’s the kind of guy kids like you shouldn’t want to hang out with,” Shin said. “He’s bent the wrong way.”
“What? He’s not bent, he’s tall and straight,” Bolin said, pulling his arm above him to gesture how tall Bai was.
Shin cackled. “Being tall is the only straight thing about him.”
“So he’s gay? Love is love,” Bolin said, and Shin was just finding this conversation hilarious.
“So, you know the sort. I know the sort. Don’t trust them around kids,” Shin said, letting out a cackle, which sent a shiver down Mako’s spine, as the thought freaked Mako out to the core.
“Bolin, come on,” Mako said, and pulled Bolin away from this conversation.
“I don’t get it, Bai is cool.” Bolin said as they ventured into the evening streets. “He let us look at the motorcycle the other day.”
“Bolin, he’s saying Bai is dangerous and hurts kids,” Mako said. “Just because someone is nice to you doesn’t mean they’re a nice person. I’ve told you this before.” He wished Bolin would get more street smart. He wished he’d get more aware, so Mako didn’t have to worry about him all the time.
“Okay,” Bolin said, a frown on his face.
This kind of talk from the triads was normal, expected, by now. How Bolin carried the same innocent view of everyone around them. Mako knew who to trust. Bolin didn’t.
Bolin was too soft like that. Mako knew about the world. He knew what he had to do to keep Bolin safe.
Mako met Bai, a quiet middle-aged car mechanic who lived alone, as far as Mako could tell. They always met him in his car workshop, so he was always covered in grease.
“Sending children, what’s wrong with them?” Bai muttered to himself, and handed Mako an envelope of cash, in response to the bill and likely threatening letter Mako had given him.
“You kids want something to eat?” Bai asked and turned to his desk, likely trying to find some candy. Bolin’s face lit up, causing Mako to groan inwardly as Bolin discarded the advice he’d just given.
“No, Bai, leave us alone,” Mako said firmly, a warning, and pulled Bolin away quickly. Bai frowned as they left the workshop and they travelled through the cool evening air.
There was a flash of hurt on Bai’s face; doubt creeping into Mako’s mind about Shin’s warning. But he didn’t know Bai’s intentions, so he didn’t regret it.
Bai had elected to pursue a tough life, and Mako couldn’t be held accountable for his choices. Mako had his own life to worry about.
So any choices he made, he buried down.
He wasn’t like Bai. He was nothing like Bai.
And then Mako sees the headline.
King Wu wows the world by admitting he is dating... a man!!
So much for being discreet.
“I have decided to be as honest with the world as I have now been with myself. I cannot marry a woman. I am a homosexual man and I am currently dating a man.
I have never been happier after being honest with myself, and then to the public.”
And on the headline there was Wu with a long-haired man with loose curls tied up into a bun at the back, holding hands with Wu, with a big, wide smile on his face.
Hyuk looked nice, and there was a short paragraph describing Hyuk as the heir to a noble house that were currently working as advisors to Wu.
With that background, Hyuk seemed like someone that was far more appropriate for Wu than Mako. That was a good thing.
But, Mako was definitely taller than him.
Not that it mattered, of course. It was just a fact.
He even received a letter on his desk the day after it occurred.
I realised I didn’t want to hide Hyuk. Or, I’d like to keep the relationship private but I don’t want to look over my shoulder in fear that we might be found out if we simply go outside together. It was frightening, and some of the talk has been predictably negative but I’m glad I did it. I feel happier like this. I am tired of feeling ashamed of who I am. The pressure to marry and have a child was intense, but I’m glad I’m rid of that now.
Mako wrote back, offering his congratulations and that he was glad
Oh well. Wu was happy, and that was it. He tried to push it to the back of his mind.
Except, of course, Wu was talk of the town.
“So, when Wu was hitting on us,” Korra had said, looking over to them all during a meeting with the president over the spirit portal. “He was faking?”
Asami nodded. “Is it a shock to you?”
“Well, I guess I can see it now. It makes sense.”
“I don’t know if it was a surprise,” Asami said, brushing her hair through her fingers.
“Yeah, yeah, you just have a sixth sense with these things Asami,” Korra then looked over to Mako. “Did you know? As his bodyguard.”
“Maybe,” Mako said, and he knows it’s just a yes. “It wasn’t my place to say anything. It’s private.”
And part of him is mad at Wu, mad at Wu for being so worried and scared of the consequences, just like Mako and then telling everyone like it was nothing.
Not that Mako was like Wu. It was just a concern that Mako had.
All concern.
“Mako, you good?” Korra asked, concern lacing her voice.
“Sure, just fine,” Mako muttered. Asami cast him a sideways glance, and he avoided her look.
Tenzin cleared his throat. “We’re discussing the spirit portal,” he reminded everyone. Korra straightened herself and mentioned her plans to designate the land as special, protected park.
Mako’s mind discarded the thoughts and focus on the actual issues at hand. Mako was fine. Everything was fine.
Mako was fifteen when he met Kun.
Kun was from the Earth Kingdom and was doing odd jobs. Immediately fell in with the Triple threats. He had a mischievous glint and was cocky as anything. Kun demanded attention even at his young age of fifteen, with his flashy smiles, floppy mid-brown hair and sun-kissed tan, freckled skin. He had bright green eyes, more intense than Bolin’s. And it was that gaze that made it impossible for Mako to ignore him. He was looking over at Mako with long stares and lazy grins.
Kun was weird with Mako.
“What kind of thugs are these guys sending out two kids to do security?”
“We’re just scoping out trouble,” Mako retorted, though they hang there in that alley and lean against the wall, as they stared out into the streets to watch the passers-by. There likely wouldn’t be trouble, but they had to stay here until Zolt and the top of the triple threats had an important meeting in an unassuming room at the back of a bar. It was a job for him and Kun, and he’d groaned when he realised he was going to be paired with Kun for a few hours until the triads arrived.
He wasn’t sure why. Kun was just invasive of privacy, clearly.
The air was chilly, the tips of his ears stinging in the cool air, and Mako shivered, so he lit a flame in his hand.
“Share?” Kun asked, and Mako grunted and grew the flame bigger and Kun nestled in, bumping shoulders with him.
Kun’s shoulder rubbed against Mako’s and Mako felt himself grow warmer. He must be holding the flame too close to his face, but despite the low light, Kun seemed to notice.
“Hi grumpy,” he said, poking Mako gently in the face. “My grumpy little firebender.”
“I’m not yours,” Mako scowled as he responded, pulling the heat away from Kun.
“Oh yeah, you’re far too independent.”
Mako isn’t sure how Kun is teasing him, so Mako doesn’t reply. He instead stays silent. They’re here to work, not… talk with each other.
He looked up from the floor to see Kun watching him, and Mako’s cheeks flushed.
The gaze is intense, and he looks at Kun. He grew in closer in, and his presence within Mako’s eyesight as his face was pressed close to Mako’s face.
Mako finally looked up, and Kun leant in. He didn’t go further, but Mako did, and Mako didn’t know why, but they kissed. Mako was curious — curious about how it would feel. It was gentle and chaste and nothing like the action he had seen triad members give to the women they’d get with.
Mako liked it. Mako also came to his senses, and he shoved Kun off.
“What’s your problem?” Kun asked, scowling.
“I don’t like boys. I like girls.”
“You know you can like both, dipshit,” Kun said, and crossed his arms.
Mako scowled to himself. “We have work to do,” Mako said.
“Tomorrow, at dusk,” Kun said, relaxing back onto the wall. Not a care in the world. “We could meet by the park entrance. I could you show you this isn’t as scary as you think.
Mako’s turned to shoulder to Kun, facing back into the street, his response wordless as his mind raced, and Kun looked away with a smirk as Zolt arrived with the other triad members. Mako confirmed they had seen no threats to the meeting. He and Kun got to leave as the members of the Triple Threats filed into the back room. Zolt still wanted to keep them at an arms length regarding the most secretive aspects of the triad.
Kun purposefully brushed past Mako as they walked down the street, Kun increasing his gait in front of Mako. “Tomorrow, at five in the afternoon.”
He could imagine going and pressing soft kisses to Kun under the growing evening sky.
Images of his parents flashed through his mind, and he shook his head as he settled on Bolin. He can’t get distracted, especially not with… this.
Mako had worked too hard to keep them out of trouble.
He returned home to Bolin, who’s sleeping at the underpass, and didn’t stir when Mako approached him and sat beside him. Bolin was such a heavy sleeper, and he never really took Mako’s warnings to heart to stay on guard.
Mako started a fire, before he mumbled a soft ‘sorry’ to the air.
The meeting with Kun didn’t happen, and a few days later, he saw Kun again when the triads had brought the various kids together.
Bolin overheard Kun call Mako a coward when Kun had brushed past him. Nothing more to say.
“Mako,” Bolin asked, curious. “Did something happen between you and Kun?”
“No,” Mako answered with a hiss.
Bolin stared up at Mako. “Is it because Kun likes guys?”
“How do you know that he likes guys?” Mako snapped, heart racing.
“Because we chatted about probending and he told me he liked the earthbender from the Rabaroos.”
“Why would you think I have a problem with it?”
“Because you’re so grumpy and stuck about it whenever it comes up. It’s weird.”
“Well, maybe I do have a problem with it, and maybe I do think it’s weird. And don’t bring it up again, Bolin,” he’d snapped to Bolin.
Bolin’s eyes had widened, and he leant back and frowned at him.
Kun never struck Mako as the kindest man out there, but maybe Kun just knew what he wanted and would not compromise for it.
That was nice for him. But Mako had Bolin to look after.
He caught Kun's eyes a few times after that, but he looked away, and Kun ended up looking at him with disdain. Until one day Kun didn’t appear at the triad meetings anymore — according to Shin, he’d joined a ship crew and was now hauling fish across the ocean. An unusual job for an earthbender, but Kun had never wanted to be tied down.
Like most things, Kun became just a memory that Mako could no longer effect.
Not someone to worry about, or someone that could change Mako.
Because even if Mako was like Kun in some way, Mako didn’t need to act on it.
And Wu updated Mako. He doesn’t always talk about Hyuk, the handsome boyfriend he now swanned around the town with.
Mako tried to avoid the gossip rags on shelves that discussed Wu’s love life, but that didn’t mean he didn’t notice the front pages.
Wu and boyfriend spotted watching the sunset in the south-side gardens of Ba Sing Se.
Who cared about this? Mako didn’t. He preferred to hear it from Wu.
Oh Mako, Hyuk got me a new bracelet the other day! It has pearls on it!
Okay, Maybe Mako didn’t want to know at all; not about the bracelets Hyuk bought Mako that probably cost an entire month of Mako’s salary.
But he still liked hearing from Wu about anything else.
It’s a fundraising event, and Mako often gets invited to attend fancy, high class he doesn’t want to go to, as a friend of the Avatar. This isn’t one of them. Bolin has organised this fundraisier for children on the streets, as a way for raising money. He know Bolin lobbies Zhu-Li privately, but raising money through the state takes time. A private event to open an orphanage for lots of kids and be able to furnish the thing well and feeds the kids something more exciting than cold rice.
It required a fancy dress code, so Mako had even purchased a new suit for it. A suit he purchased from the off season discount rail, but hey, it was new.
Mako already had a pair of faux gold cufflink but he saw the ones Wu bought him, still wrapped in the small box. They were more appropriate for tonight, so he clipped them on.
When Bolin was up on stage, Mako could realise how far they had come. How far Bolin had come. Bolin was more assured now than just his bravado, as he confidently explained why they needed to raise funds. He still explained the reasoning as ‘kids need food and love and stuff’, but the message was clear, and many rich aristocrats were signing up to fund this orphanage.
Mako was proud of him. Mako could truly see that Bolin didn’t need him anymore.
Thinking of that fact made Mako drift his attention to the promise he made at the gravestone. If Bolin was fine, then what else did Mako really need to try to achieve?
The cufflinks seemed to weigh heavier on his sleeves as he lifted his arm up to look at them.
Wu was freer now, more confident like Bolin. Wu was with Hyuk and, by all accounts, they were happy.
And then that made Mako’s mind drift back to the wedding, and him rejecting Wu.
Bolin came over to invade his space, a wide smile on his face. “Mako, you good?”
“Yes, Bolin. Your speech was brilliant. This whole gala is impressive.”
“Thanks. It’s been a lot of work — woah, Mako,” Bolin said, picking up Mako’s arm to view the cufflinks. “Those cuff links are swanky. And really cool. Where did you get them?”
“A gift from Wu,” Mako said. “To say thanks.”
“Aw, that’s nice,” Bolin said. “Now, I want pictures with my bro.”
“Shouldn’t you be getting pictures with the people who donated?”
“Who cares? I want us to get a free picture,” Bolin said, dragging Mako to the photo booth.
Mako spent the time with Bolin, but he was relieved when they returned to the quietness of his apartment.
When Mako went back to his room, and relaxed onto his
He should remind themself that Wu would have brought a female bodyguard something nice as well as an expression of his gratitude. Even if he didn’t confess to her soon after.
He didn’t know why he felt guilty when he put them on, Wu’s crying face. Mako wished he could just ignore it, and forget.
Why did Wu have to confess to him? He could have gone through his life not knowing. Wu even said he didn’t think Mako would have said yes.
Wu had said he’d wanted to be honest. Honest with Mako about his sexuality, about his feelings. Honest with the world about who he was dating, as well.
Honesty wasn’t a virtue that Mako afforded himself to reflect on much.
He pressed his hands to his face in bed. He took off the cufflinks and put them into his draw, hoping to forget about them, but he didn’t feel any freer.
They’re on the airship, gliding over the Earth Kingdom. Mako stood on the balcony, chin resting on his arms that he’d leant on the bar after another day of getting rejected by the newly gifted airbenders.
“It’s nice out here, bro,” Bolin said, as sunset drew over the land, bathing them in a warm, yellow glow.
“Yeah, it’s peaceful out here,” Mako said, standing straighter. The air was clear here, nothing like the smog of Republic City, and they were gliding over expansive fields, not a skyscraper in sight.
“Yeah,” Bolin said. “Mako, I have to tell you something.”
“Okay…” Mako said as he turned his attention to Bolin, his brother oddly serious. “What did you do?”
“Nothing!” Bolin protested, frowning at Mako’s judgement. “After everything that happened with Eska and Ginger, I wondered if maybe something was wrong. If maybe I wasn’t getting it,” Bolin said.
“Uh-huh,” Mako said, and he rubbed his forehead as he listened to Bolin.
“So, when you were sleeping under your desk I was at the Air Temple and I missed eating meat but don’t tell them that, so I went to go get some pork buns in the city and then I met this guy called Yunik at the bao stall. So me and this guy started to chat, and he was pretty good looking and stuff. I went back to his place and then we made out for a bit and then I went home.”
“Oh, Bolin,” Mako said, realising that this conversation was more important than he expected, and he placed his hand on Bolin’s shoulder. Mako had grown since Kun, and the childish reactin he’d had to Bolin’s prying. Whatever issues Mako might have personally and any childish things he said when he was younger, he would always be there for Bolin. He wanted his brother to be happy. And Mako would protect him. “I love you no matter what. Or who you love. We’re there for each other.”
“Thanks,” Bolin said, and drew Mako into a hug. “I just wanted to let you know that I’m straight.”
Mako pulled away from the hug and glared at his brother. “You’re... straight?”
“Yeah, kissing him didn’t do anything for me. I’m gonna keep an open mind but I think I only like girls.”
“Why are you telling me this, Bolin? This isn’t something that really needs to be discussed.”
“Well, why not? I thought I might not be straight, but I think I am, especially since Eska and Ginger didn’t work out. We kinda just assume everyone is the norm and that sucks.”
When did Bolin become a philosopher?
“You just need to meet the right girl, Bolin. She’s out there,” Mako replied.
“Yeah,” Bolin said, and patted Mako on the back. “And with everything, back at ya. You’d meet the right girl, or guy, if you want.”
Bolin’s just being supportive and kind, but Mako’s stomach twisted into knots and he didn’t know what to say at first, and Bolin just smiled at him and Mako wondered if he knew, if he knew about the kiss with Kun, knew about all the doubts he’d had during his life. Bolin wouldn’t care, Mako knew that. It was blindingly obvious how much Bolin had always had no issues with it since that day he first asked Mako, so long ago on the streets.
Korra and Asami didn’t work out, but Mako had known that he’d liked them. They’d invaded his mind and captured his thoughts and feelings in a way he hadn’t known possible before — even more than the brief encounter with Kun.
The kiss with Kun had never meant anything. It was nothing. Mako knew it would be easier to just carry on ignoring that kiss that day and anything else.
“I’m sure I’ll meet the right girl some day,” he finished, as if trying to move on from the conversation, as if trying to tell Bolin he’s okay.
Bolin hung around for a bit, tapping his feet on the airship deck and enjoying the view, but he never had much patience, so he left Mako to presumably return to his quarters after Mako let the conversation die.
They didn’t need to have this conversation was in the first place. This wasn’t the sort of topic that ever needed to be said aloud.
There was nothing to discuss.
Mako and Bolin’s family had scattered around Republic City and beyond. Meng Meng had moved in with a boyfriend, and his many cousins and cousins of cousins had began to move out.
Yin often spoke of wanting to move back to Ba Sing Se, but Chow was reluctant as he’d gotten a better paid job in fruit distribution, and she wouldn’t leave without him. They remained at the Sato Estate for now, Asami currently spending more time with Korra at the Air Temple, but Mako knew they had to make a decision as Asami was thinking of selling the house.
So they tried to discuss the future, but it always circled back to tradition. They had seen their family at Bolin’s fundraiser, but they hadn’t discussed Wu when there was a more celebratory manner. Mako hadn’t considered that his Grandma would want to discuss it, even after a few weeks of Wu and Hyuk being official in the press.
“I don’t understand,” Yin had said at one get together in the Sato Estate, when the topic had naturally drifted to current affairs and the abdication. “Wu can’t seriously be dating this man?”
“Grandma, he is,” Bolin responded firmly, as he frowned.
She frowned. “But why? He was a such a clever young man. A true gentleman, who should court a gentle lady.”
“He’s gay,” Mako said bluntly, wishing this conversation could end quickly.
“That’s not very becoming of a King,” she sniffed.
Bolin shook his head. “That’s not nice Grandma! He’s just trying to be happy.”
“But he’s the King! The royal family set an example. What other people do in the privacy of their own homes doesn’t bother me, but the nation was built on a strong family like his, just like a family like ours,” she said. “It’s tradition.”
“Well, he won’t be King anyway,” Mako reminded Yin.
Yin kept her frown. “I was hoping he’d change his mind,” she said, a frown adorning her face. “I guess this is how things shall be.”
Mako tuned out the rest. Bolin clearly wasn’t happy, but Mako didn’t want to continue the conversation.
Bolin had no idea that Yin was family and didn’t have the same ideas as him.
Later, Grandma had left them to help with the washing up, and Bolin took Mako aside. “Surprised that Grandma doesn’t like Wu anymore.”
Mako shrugged. “You can’t expect some people to change their minds quickly. Especially older people.”
Bolin frowned. “Maybe we should if they’re wrong.”
It’s so easy to say that. Harder to achieve.
Bolin continued, “Mako, it’s okay to like men—”
“I know. I’m still friends with Wu. Why do you act so surprised?”
“I’m not trying to talk about Wu!” Bolin snapped. “You always shut this conversation down.”
“What conversation, Bolin?” Mako asked. “And I can’t have a conversation if it’s just one sided. What are you trying to discuss?”
Bolin sighed as Mako walked away. “Yeah. Forget I said anything.”
Mako snorted and walked away to help Yin with the plates, avoiding Bolin’s concerned gaze, ignoring the mutterings under Bolin’s breath.
He hadn’t known Yin’s more conservative worldview, so today must have been a shock.
Mako’s family was kind and welcoming, and they’d embraced Mako and Bolin into the family with open arms.
It’s strange. They’d never had any family to rely on before. No-one to rely on who would protect them just because they existed by blood. In some aspects, the concept was foreign to Mako. He didn’t know he’d people at all, yet they cared. And he cared about them.
Though sometimes….
It wasn’t long after they’d arrived in Republic City, when Bolin had just left for Kuvira’s army and their family was still settling. Mako helped Tu write a resume at Asami’s place when Yin returned with Chow after a day out in the city.
She pinched his cheeks and sat beside, spreading out an impressive lay of fruit they’d purchased, before promising that they’d make their famous fruit tarts, inspired by the air nomads.
Yin sat down on the chair, relieved to rest on her aching legs. Mako was concerned someone as old as Yin was going on long walks around Republic City, but Yin didn’t want to stop moving even in her advanced age. “Republic City differs greatly from Ba Sing Se,” she said. “The clothing — there’s mixing of colours.”
Chow Sr and Tu came through and smiled at Mako as he sat down beside his Grandma.
“And walking down the street, you can see two men holding hands.”
Mako’s stomach flipped. This was one of his worst fears being realised in real time.
Tu made a blowing raspberry noise as he flopped down into the couch opposite. “Who really cares?”
“Feet off the couch, Tu!” Yin tutted strongly, as Tu straightened up. Grandma Yin just huffed to herself. “I don’t care, but some things best remain private, right? I think a lot is changing in the world. You wouldn’t see this in the royal family…” she said, and began to talk about King Kuei and Queen Hou-Ting, and their families before them. She spoke so lovingly of them all.
Yin had an idea of what mattered and what was right, and Mako wondered, briefly, if that would have bled into his father, San.
It made Mako queasy, so he eventually left to admire the gardens of the mansion.
Chow joined Mako, as if he’d sensed Mako’s unease. “Sorry about Ma. She’s old-fashioned through and through. Always has been. You can take the traditionalist out of Ba Sing Se and kill the Queen, but you can’t take tradition out of her.”
“It’s fine,” Mako muttered, and let the topic drop with him and his Uncle, who just smiled in response, satisfied.
Family was important to Mako. They were the only link he had at the moment to his after. Their opinion mattered. He loved his Grandma.
It only meant Mako would not discuss the conversations he had in his head aloud.
Mako was in the market, buying various fruits and vegetables. He was dressed in his police uniform, having just got off from work, when someone stood by him and began to inspecting the vegetables as well before purchasing.
He was aware of a pair on eyes on him, which wasn’t uncommon in Mako’s small version of fame, but he realised he too recognised the face that wore those eyes.
“Bai?” he asked, and the man nodded.
“Yes, wasn’t sure if you’d remember me,” the car mechanic said, a smile adorning his face. His hair was fully grey now, but he was as tall as ever.
Mako knew he couldn’t forget Bai. That whole interaction had impacted him greatly.
“It wasn’t certainly interesting to see your trajectory from when you started to where you are now,” Bai said. “Recently the triple threats have stopped calling…” Bai said, and continued on to state how he was free from triad interest now that a few key arrests had weakened the Triple Threats.
“It was nice to catch up. I’m glad you and your brother are living such good lives now,” Bai said. “I must run. My husband will be upset if I miss dinner.”
Mako waved goodbye to Bai, and they parted as if they were old friends. Bai hadn’t touched upon the previous history, and Mako was sure Bai knew what the triads said about him.
Maybe Bai found today a chance to correct the narrative, or maybe he just wanted to greet Mako as an old friend. Either way, Mako had never seen a dangerous, lost or lonely man, and today only confirmed that the triads were no great moralisers of life and love.
Mako knew the triads spoke a lot of lies, but that didn’t make it easier to unlearn.
He walked past another magazine with Wu, and he found himself stop, stare at the glossy picture of Hyuk and Wu. The couple had been an official for nearly two months now, and Wu’s letters were less frequent. From two a week, to one, to less.
Mako swallowed down, and then quickly walked away.
Everything was getting harder to ignore, and Mako acknowledged the feeling he had tried so hard to ignore.
Jealously.
When Korra was injured, It’s surprising how life settled for Mako. He enjoyed the routine of getting up for work, then coming home to make dinner and then reading a book, digesting words page by page, just like his life. There was no struggle for survival. He could sit and think about the words in a book, and he could reflect on his past.
It’s boring, and it’s something he never had before.
It gives him free time to think about things.
He goes out with Asami, sometimes. He sees her at her house when he meets with his parents, but they never see each other alone as much as they should. Work always drove them apart, and things weren’t the same without Bolin and Korra around.
It’s just the two of them in Republic City now. What was Team Avatar are currently now just meetings between two people who used to date.
But it’s not as awkward as Mako had thought. Asami was always easy to get along with when they buy drinks and talk mostly about work, sometimes about Bolin’s latest letters of his tales from the front lines.
Sometimes they talk about Korra. They both miss her. But there just isn’t much to say. She doesn’t reply to their letters, so they bring up other things.
It’s during one of their meetings in the bar, a face Mako didn’t recognise interrupted them. “Asami?” A short, pale skinned and dark-haired woman cut in as they discussed Asami’s new car model.
“Fen?” Asami said. “It’s good to see you! It’s been years.”
“You look amazing, Asami,” Asami’s acquaintance said excitedly. “I can’t believe it’s been so long.”
Asami turned to Mako, realising she was being rude. “Mako, this is Fen, my ex-girlfriend from school,” Asami said, gesturing to the girl.
Mako’s mouth hung ajar. What?
Fen had a few friends with her, so she didn’t stay at the table long. “Asami, we’ll have to hang out soon!” Fen waved her hand excitedly. “I’ll get my people to call your people.”
Asami waved goodbye to her. She turned to Mako; and sipped her drink, saying nothing as she held his gaze. Mako twiddles his thumbs as she put down her drink, her gaze sturdy as she said. “So, I am bisexual—“
“That’s okay. I’m cool with that.”
Asami looked at him, the lines on her face drawn into a stern smile. “I can tell.”
“No, Asami, really. I don’t — I’m just surprised. You never said.”
“No-one ever asked about who I dated before,” Asami said.
Mako paused. “I am… sorry. I guess — I just assumed—”
“That you were my first?”
Mako nodded dumbly. Then Asami’s stern face broke, and she let out a loud laugh into the air.
“I’m teasing you, Mako. Relax.”
“Don’t you worry, though? If someone finds out?”
Asami frowned, and Mako wished he hadn’t turned the conversation so quickly dour again. She shook her head. “No, I don’t. Marriage has been legal for thirty years. I’ve nothing to hide.” Asami said. “It’s not really an issue anymore, is it? We can ignore anyone else.”
Asami was using the word ‘we’ pretty liberally.
It wasn’t as easy as Asami suggested. He wondered if Asami was blind to it, or just from a different world. Asami’s life was never one that involved fighting for survival.
But it was certainly a different way of looking at the world.
Mako had been so relieved when he fell for Asami, then Korra. He’d always liked women from afar, but these were the first relationships he’d had. They didn’t work out, but the feelings were real.
It had meant that life could be easy.
“It is still an issue, though, for many people,” Asami said, maybe noticing Mako’s silence and implicitly correcting herself. Asami was always good at correcting herself, aware in ways that Mako was not. “Sometimes the first person you have to be brave for is yourself,” Asami continued. “The first person I told was myself. I looked in the mirror and I told my reflection that I liked women. It felt… validating, which meant that I could tell my Dad.”
“Was your Dad okay with it?”
“He didn’t mind, but he didn’t take an interest in my girlfriend. I think looking back, his priorities were elsewhere,” Asami said, a breath sucked into her lungs and she looked to the side. “That’s just how he is.” She took a sip of her drink, and Mako knew they were crossing into territory that Asami didn’t want to talk about, so they moved on to work, the relationship.
Mako has nothing more to offer Asami other than comfort, so he squeezed her hand.
They move on back to work, and Mako loved hearing about all of Asami’s many projects and new road designs, even if he was sure it was dull for anyone overhearing. But before they left for the night, Asami turned to him.
“You know, if you needed to talk to me about anything more personal, you can, right? I’m always here,” she said.
“I — you too,” he agreed, and Asami smiled.
“I know that, Mako,” she said. “Like I said. Your own self is the first person you have to be honest with,” she said, and with that final statement, she left him alone with his thoughts.
The King Alone — has Wu split up with boyfriend?
King Wu has made an appearance at the opening of the new gallery of Ba Sing Se alone, without his boyfriend in sight, adding fuel to the rumours that he has split from his boyfriends of three months.
Mako had paused to study the headline on his way to work, before he quickly ignored it. It was just that Wu also hadn’t replied to Mako in two weeks. Which was fine. Wu was busy. He had a boyfriend (?), and Mako was just his old bodyguard who meant nothing to him anymore. Mako had tried to make that clear to Wu.
Mako reminded himself most days he was happy for Wu. Happy for his relationship.
And after he returned home from work, there was a letter in the box, a familiar, looped handwriting greeting Mako’s eyes as he hurried back to his apartment.
Mako had opened the letter.
Sorry I haven’t replied as quickly this time. The truth is, I’ve been busy.
Life is so hard as the King. I get that I shouldn’t complain as I have so much. I have been visiting the poorer areas of Ba Sing Se and it’s so different, Mako. Though maybe you already knew that and I’m playing catch-up.
But there’s so much to handle, as King, and sometimes the stress is so much I don’t know how to bear it.
It felt like my relationship with Hyuk suffered because of this. He was nice, but we had little to talk about. He didn’t seem to care the way I wanted him to care about the Earth Kingdom, so it was hard for me to feel like he cared about the stress I was under. Sure, pearls are nice, but they don’t really fix anything. Can you believe that I’m saying that Mako, when one of the first things we did together was me forcing you to take me to a jewellery store?
I think Hyuk wanted someone more fun. And I can be fun, right? I just have to find a balance between the fun side of me, and the serious. I don’t think I’m much fun recently. I delayed writing you a letter to concentrate on Hyuk, but it didn’t work.
We broke up a few days ago from when I write this. I wish I had someone to talk to
The letter was torn at the bottom so the paper size was smaller than normal, as if Wu had written something, then had discarded the words physically.
—deeply. More than just whatever silly conversations about fashion or the weather or the new music released on vinyl discs.
But! I will persevere for now alone! I don’t need him. Honestly, being apart from him is slightly freeing. I don’t think we would have worked ever, really. But he was important to me, so I am grateful for his company.
Mako paused as he held the letter in his hand. Mako wanted to know what Wu had written that he decided to physically throw away. He wanted to write to Wu and tell him that he was fun, that he was trying his best and it was fine to feel stressed. That it was okay to not be okay— even if that was advice he was still learning himself.
Mako had done so well in ignoring the jealousy that seeped within him, but here it was, coming out.
Mako, I’m going to be in Republic City in two weeks from the day I send this letter. I need a break, and I would like to think about getting something more permanent in Republic City. I would like to meet up with you if you’re free. Let me know what you think!
Your friend,
Wu.
Mako wanted to meet up with Wu. A lot. And that was an issue.
Mako hadn’t met no no one like Wu before. Well, he had thought that when he met Korra, then Asami. Asami and Korra were always grounded, despite their differences with Mako. Wu…. wasn’t.
Mako was sure Wu was from another realm, just like the spirits. He didn’t seem to care about anything. He wanted his life to be ‘crazy’ with greeting the fans of the monarchy, but safe and respectable. The most strenuous thing he did was go to the spa.
Mako didn’t know how Wu could act like this all the time, with nothing to hold him down.
Sometimes Wu had meetings with Raiko, though he could tell the President limited them to schmoozing in front of the cameras and nothing policy wise.
Wu was adrift in Republic City, and Mako was along for the ride.
But then everything began to change. Kuvira stopped being an ally and became a threat, and Wu suddenly has more on his plate than ever before. The kidnapping frightened Mako, and Mako feels terrified and is so relieved when he’s back safely.
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have left you alone,” Mako had told him when Wu was getting ready for bed in the room in Asami’s mansions. The light it low, the mansion is quiet. Mako isn’t sure why Wu is awake this late. Mako is awake because well, the kidnapping lingered.
“It’s okay,” Wu said, though Wu seemed far away. “I don’t think I’ve ever had my life threatened like that.”
You’ll get used to it, are the words Mako didn’t say. Because even though he thinks it would be true for Wu, he hoped it wouldn’t be.
“It’s made me think a lot about a lot of things.” There was silence. “Mako?” Wu asked, voice uncharacteristically quiet. “Do you ever feel like you’re pretending to be someone you’re not?”
There was hesitation in Wu’s voice, and Mako considered Wu’s words. Introspection was not something Mako rarely granted himself. But he was getting better, at least. “Sometimes.”
“Yeah,” Wu said, his hand resting on the side of the bed. “Yeah,” he repeated, looking at Mako, then outside.
Mako didn’t know what to do. What was inappropriate or not? He placed his hand on Wu’s shoulder.
He didn’t want to offer any more to Wu. He didn’t want to infringe upon Wu’s personal space, he—
Wu launched himself at Mako and buried his head into Mako’s shoulder, his fingers grasping at Mako’s suit.
It’s the first genuine hug they have ever had. Mako didn’t push Wu away that night.
Often, Mako returned to his parents’ shrine.
Mako had replaced the wooden plaque with a stone monument. It was simple and smaller compared to the other monuments in the cemetery, and his parent’s ashes were still buried in what was the pauper’s graveyard, but Mako didn’t mind. He didn’t need ostentatious, he just wanted a permanent fixture.
What was important was the promise that Mako had made all that time ago, and then keeping it.
Bolin often used to speak aloud to them, telling them about his day, week, entire life, spewing word vomit at their graves.
Mako used to sit in silence, and wish that he could talk like Bolin did to the grave.
But today, the day he received Wu’s letter about being back in Republic City, Mako spoke. “What do you want from me?” Mako asked. “What would you have let me be?”
Only silence met Mako’s questioning, and the not knowing was the most devastating part of asking aloud.
It always seemed easier to just ignore everything that confused Mako, and bury it down, but Mako wasn’t sure it was working anymore.
Mako is in the hospital, doped up on painkillers he can’t remember the name of, and lying against an uncomfortable pillow.
Hopefully, he’d only have to stay one night, but he shifted and his arm hurt and he winced.
There’s a scrape of metal and the curtain was drawn, and Wu is standing before him. He has dust and mud covering him from head to toe, and his perfectly coiffed hair is in disarray. It was a Wu that Mako hadn’t ever been witness to, he still mostly looked good after the kidnpaping.
“Wu—“
Wu cut Mako off cut off as he flung his body at the injured man, though Wu was careful to only launch himself at his right side. “You’re okay! Lin said you were in the hospital and I was so worried about you!” He sniffed, and buried his damp eyes on Mako’s shoulder, which Mako hesitated to call him out on.
He was surprised that Wu appeared so distraught. Not only had he made the effort to visit Mako, but he’d only just got back from the evacuation and had skipped getting ready to visit him.
Mako supposed that any type of employer/employee relationship the pair of them had was long gone over the past month or so. Now, they were just friends.
Wu’s presence was weirdly comforting, similarly that some of his friends were. He could recognise Wu’s perfumed scent on him as Wu wrapped himself on top of Mako.
“You have to promise me, Mako, that you won’t get into trouble again! My heart won’t take it!” Wu exclaimed as he pulled himself away from Mako. His face was screwed up, and Mako’s hurt lurched as Mako realised that Wu was upset over him.
Mako smiled. No such promises could ever be made. “Glad to see you’re okay, Wu.”
Wu smiled at him, his eyes still watery, but the sight was enough to make Mako feel a little warm inside. Wu looked far better smiling than he did crying.
He felt his eyes droop and Wu clutched his good hand, and lightly caressed it.
This made Mako feel even warmer.
“You sleep Mako, I’ll watch over you,” Wu said, tone forceful as he patted Mako’s hand. “I can be the bodyguard.”
And despite the ridiculousness of that statement, for some strange reason, Mako felt safe.
He returned to his empty apartment and walked straight into the bathroom.
First, you admit it to yourself.
That’s what everyone seemed to say. That’s what Asami said, and she was more perceptive than pretty much anyone he knew, and maybe she was trying to tell him something that day.
That’s what Wu had done. He accepted himself. And by Wu’s letters, he was much happier now, despite the stress.
Mako looked to the mirror hung above the sink, and uttered: “I like men,” to his reflection.
His reflection didn’t show, his frown turning into a smile. He certainly didn’t feel freer than before. The statement had been running around in his head as a fact for weeks now, saying it aloud didn’t make him feel any better to admit to himself what he had known for ages, but ignored.
It was just the same Mako staring back at him, so he launched his fist and and struck the mirror. It cracked, and he winced as he pulled his fist away, bloody, his knuckles stinging.
His anger dissipated as he stared at the shards of glass that fell onto the floor. Telling the mirror how he felt didn’t make him feel better. Neither did punching the mirror. In fact, now he felt a whole lot worse, including because Bolin was going to ask questions now.
He sighed and went to the kitchen., and swept up the shards of glass into a bag, before he wrapped his knuckles in a bandage.
He’s lost in his own thoughts, a book on his lap he hasn’t turned a page for in minutes, when Bolin reappears in the flat. He heard Bolin clunk around the flat. “I brought takeaway!” Bolin said, and Mako is so distracted he hadn’t even thought about food so he’s happy that Bolin has met their needs. Mako ate in silence, as Bolin rabbited on about his day and President Zhu-Li. He asked about Mako’s hand, and Mako said it was a work injury.
It wasn’t much later until after food, when Bolin used the bathroom. Frowning, Bolin joined Mako in the living room, deeply confused. “Where’s the mirror?”
“It broke,” Mako said.
Bolin looked at Mako, then at Mako’s hand, pointing at it. “Was the fight with the mirror?”
Mako was never any good at lying. “I thought I looked ugly.”
“Yeah, you really crack mirrors,” Bolin said, and then grinned. “I know that you’re joking, Mako. Even if Mako-jokes are rare. You used to practise pouty faces for probending. You know you’re not ugly.”
The comment made Mako smile at Bolin as he tittered in defeat, as Bolin took his hand and unwrapped the gauze, before wrapping fresh bandages round tighter.
“You’ve been more worked up than usual lately,” Bolin said. “Why?”
“Things on my mind,” Mako said. “Work.”
“You’re the type of guy who just gets on with that sort of stuff.”
“I know. And I am.”
“I mean, work doesn’t stress you out. You’re weird like that, Mako.”
Mako sighed. “I’m just… confused.”
“About…”
Mako shrugged. “Bolin, it doesn’t matter.”
“It matters! You matter lots to me,” Bolin said. “So, is there an asshole you met?”
“No, Bolin,” he said back.
“Is there someone you like?” Mako couldn’t reply, so Bolin nodded. “Who is it?”
“No-one, Bolin, stop this,” he said.
“Sure, but I know what you get worked up over. I saw you with Korra and Asami. You get this really constipated look on your face. Is it someone I know?”
Mako didn’t reply. “It’s not what you think, can’t we just drop this?” Mako said, and moved to the kitchen.
“Mako,” Bolin said. “Is it a guy?” Mako spun round to glare at Bolin. Bolin held his hands up. “You look angry.”
“I like women, Bolin. You know that.”
“You can like both.”
“I know, but I don’t.” Mako didn’t know why he walked straight back to defensiveness after basically admitting it aloud to a mirror that no longer existed.
Bolin crossed his arms. “Mako, you know, love is love—“
“For fuck’s sake, Bolin, stop saying that like it just makes everything okay and stops every issue in the world.”
Bolin shrugged. “Maybe it fixes nothing, but it’s still the truth.”
“Bolin,” Mako warned. “I don’t see what you’re trying to get at here.”
“Okay, for one, you kinda always sorta stare at guys’ butts as well as girls.”
Mako’s cheeks heated, outrage flooding through him as he couldn’t find the words to retort. “I do not!”
“I know things, Mako! You’re pretty obvious.”
“Bolin—“
“I only mean a tasteful glance,” Bolin waved off Mako’s concerns. “Also, like, you and Kun were kinda weird.”
Mako sighed. “Nothing happened. It was a kiss, it meant nothing, and I didn’t like him.”
“Ok, I believe you, but you always get so jumpy about this sort of thing.”
“I’m not,” but Bolin only stared at him, his lips pursed as if he was trying to do a serious detective face. “I know I get jumpy,” Mako said.
Bolin looked over at him. “I don’t think you have to know for sure. You just need to chill out, see where life takes you.”
“I can’t just chill out. I’ve never been able to just chill out. Because I’m not you, Bolin! I can’t just sit back and hope everything goes okay,” he said. “I have to work hard to make sure my life doesn’t fuck up, and get worse, and I can’t see how…” he stumbled over the pause, then stopped himself fully.
“I get it. I think,” Bolin said. “You don’t want to make your life harder. Right?”
Mako shrugged his shoulders.
“But Mako, you’re not happy right now. Whatever you’re thinking is making you sad. And I don’t want you to be sad.”
It was such a simple way of looking at the situation. “Bolin…” Mako said, then lifted a hand to his face. “I told Mom and Dad I’d protect you.”
“Okayyyyyy,” Bolin said, voice pitching the ‘y’ as he tipped his head to the side, confused. “I’m still protected. And I still want you to be happy.”
“I don’t know what Mom and Dad would have thought,” he said.
“About… liking men?” Bolin asked, and he looked confused. “We don’t know what they would have thought about a lot of things. We were in the triads for a bit.”
“Yes, but I can control this,” he said, finally admitting what had been bothering him all this time.
“Mako, please,” Bolin begged. “I don’t care what Mom and Dad would have thought.”
“Well, I do.”
“They’re not here!” Bolin protested.
Mako put his hand to his face. “It’s so easy, though. To just ignore it.”
“Mom and Dad aren’t here,” Bolin repeated, quieter. “But I am. And I don’t care.”
Contrary to whatever Bolin believed, Mako already knew that. “Yeah, I know,” Mako said. “I know you wouldn’t care.” Bolin finally seated himself by Mako, and studied him intensely. “I guess it’s something that I’ve known is always there. I just want to ignore it. I don’t know why.”
“It’s okay,” Bolin said. “Really. It’s okay.”
“Wu confessed to me,” Mako admitted, words now just spilling out now he has started. “He told me he liked me, at the wedding.”
“Oh, and you told him…?”
“That I didn’t feel the same,” and there was silence.
“And do you?”
And there was a pause on Mako’s behalf. “I think so,” Mako said. “I don’t know. I can’t get him out of my head.”
Bolin beamed. “That sounds great. You should tell him that.”
Mako exhaled. “It’s difficult.”
Bolin opened his mouth, then didn’t seem to talk for a few moments. Previously Bolin would just talk without thinking. His little brother had grown. Bolin finally spoke. “I think you should ask to see him next time you can. Its gotta be better than punching a mirror,” Bolin said, pointing to his hand.
Mako sighed and regarded his hand. Bolin had a point.
“I’m sorry,” Mako said. “I don’t know why I find this so hard to talk about.”
He’d never wanted to talk about it. He’d never known what to say. How could he?
Just bury it down deep inside himself, but he realised that each time he did so he lost himself a little each time he denied himself the opportunity to reflect.
And Bolin made it so simple. He wasn’t happy at the moment. And surely, his parents would want him to be happy?
That’s what he remembered with his parents or he saw with the parents in the street with their kids. Love and support and happiness.
“Do you feel better talking about it and stuff?” Bolin asked.
“Yeah,” Mako admitted. He’d known Bolin wouldn’t care, but Bolin coming out and saying so to his face after Mako was a unique thing. And finally, making that step meant something. “I think I’m bisexual.”
Bolin’s face beamed at Mako’s revelation, and he moved over to hug Mako tight.
“So, should we have a party now?” Bolin asked as he released Mako from the hug.
“A party?”
“A coming out party.”
“That isn’t a thing, Bolin, and I wouldn’t want one, anyway.” It was a horrifying concept. Mako couldn't begin to imagine.
Bolin snorted. “I think it’s a great excuse for a party. And you then can tell everyone there.”
“Bolin, I will tell people in my own time.”
“Fine, I guess.” Bolin tutted. Mako knew he’d dropped it for today, but Bolin would get some sort of party, one day. Hopefully not soon.
“But will you tell him?” Bolin broke his silence. “‘Cos, I think you should. I could even tell him for you.” Bolin’s face lit up, and pressed his hands together. “I have a great plan.”
The disaster scenario Bolin was proposing was a force impossible for Mako to ignore. “I will tell him, Bolin. I want to,” he assured his brother.
His brother had a playful smirk on his face. Maybe Bolin did know what he was doing.
Mako wrote to Wu, inviting Wu to a tea-shop Mako knew. Artisanal, fancy and overpriced teas were the main draw, but it was a nice, neutral place for them to meet, and they’d allowed Mako to book a private booth, with cups of tea in porcelain cups and a fine teapot, surrounded by cream walls and plush seating.
“Mako, this is so lovely,” Wu said as he had been shown the booth. “I almost feel underdressed. I should have gotten you a better uniform,” Wu said, as he admired Mako’s best smart-casual look he’d pieced together of a jacket, slacks, dress shoes and a nice shirt.
Wu’s gaze was on him, and Mako felt hot under the collar as Wu quickly turned back to the tea. “Mako, it’s great to see you,” Wu rambled, pouring himself tea. “How have you been?”
“Oh, you know, I’ve been good. Work isn’t too bad.”
“That’s good. Your work is far too dangerous, Mako, I get worried.”
“Yep,” Mako said. “It is what it is.”
“Mmm,” Wu said.
“How’s your... work?” Mako asked.
“Oh you know, thinking of chopping a mountain in half so two states don’t argue over it.”
“Sounds extreme.”
“I think at this rate it’s the easiest solution,” Wu said, rubbing his temples.
“So, laziness wins out?”
Wu smirked. “I like it when you joke, Mako. You’re often too serious.”
Mako smiled to himself at that.
He couldn’t be like that with everyone.
Wu just made it easy.
Wu leant back in the table's chair. “So, after I finish up with the transition, I think I’ll move back to Republic City.”
“You don’t want to stay in Ba Sing Se?”
“I love it there. I’ll visit. But I think the city needs to get rid of the old order, and I can’t be hanging around like a royal spectre, haunting the new regime. Plus, I also love Republic City,” Wu said, then he brought the tea to his lips. “So, Mako, I need to know why you called this meeting.”
“I…” he said, and then the words were dry on his lips. “Can’t we just meet up?”
“Yeah, we can, you know I’m happy to,” Wu said. “But you still initiated this. And here I was, thinking I liked you more than you liked me,” Wu said.
“Didn’t we already know that?” Mako asked, and Wu’s smile fell.
“Yeah, you’re right, we did know that,” Wu said and evaded his gaze, stirring his tea with a spoon.
Why was he saying the wrong thing? That isn’t what he wanted to say at all.
“I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you and the wedding confession. I saw you in the garden crying,” he blurted out.
Wu looked up at him and put his face in his hands, mortified. “—don’t remind me, Mako—”
“—I’m sorry I didn’t say anything to comfort you.”
“Frankly, Mako, at that moment I think you trying to comfort me at that moment would have been worse.”
“I’m not that bad.”
“No, I mean, I was too heartbroken and seeing you trying to make me feel better, but not in the way I wanted might have been too much. Being apart has helped that.”
“You still wrote.”
“Yeah, what can I say. I wanted your company, but it was easier when I didn’t have to look at your face,” Wu said. “I’ve always been so used to getting what I want that not being able to acquire you was a tough pill to swallow. But I adapted, and I still want you in my life either way.” There was a sadness in Wu’s gaze. “But thanks for feeling bad. And that’s why you wanted this meeting?” Wu said, his smile was bright.
“No,” Mako said.
Wu looked exasperated. “No?”
“I want to take you on a date.”
Wu’s long stare turned wide and his hand slipped over the teacup in his hand, spilling tea over his hand and into his lap.
“Oh - Wu-” Mako said, grabbing a serviette and rubbing Wu’s leg. “Are you hurt?”
“Oh, Mako, sorry, don’t bother! The tea was tepid. I was just surprised! I must have misheard you,” Wu said, taking the serviette from him and continuing to wipe himself down.
Mako paused. “About the date?”
“Oh, okay, I heard you right,” Wu said, discarding the napkin to the side.
Mako swallowed as he gently took Wu’s hand. “Yes, a date, wherever you want to go.”
“So you like me? Not as a friend?” Wu asked, as his shocked eyes turned to a brilliant smile.
“Yeah. I can’t get the wedding out of my head. Not just you crying, the whole thing,” Mako sighed. “I’ve never been able to get a lot of my things out of my head. I’ve always just tried to ignore it.”
“Oh,” Wu said. “I can relate to that,” Wu said, and took his hand, slowly caressing it.
Mako flushed under Wu’s touch. It felt nice. “I wasn’t sure if you’d still like me.”
“No, Mako, I’m utterly obsessed with you. I wrote this long paragraph about how I wished I could talk to Hyuk like I talk to you, and then I tore it out. I didn’t want to pressure you again with my feelings. I wanted to keep you as a friend.”
“Oh,” Mako said, his heart aching. “Yeah. I needed to figure out some things.”
“I’m glad,” Wu said. “Well, if you want to take me out on a date, this can be our first one. I was thinking about going to the zoo, and I’m happy to take you there.”
“Sounds like a plan,” Mako said.
Wu smiled, grasping his hand. “Okay, okay, this day is just — wow,” Wu smiled. He then looked at his lap. “I must go back to the hotel room. I’ve ruined my pants,” Wu said.
Mako laughed and walked Wu back to his hotel room. Wu had willingly booked the junior suite this time, happy to settle for the less ostentatious option this time around. Well, it was still a massive suite, all things considered, but still.
He walked Wu to his door and nodded at him.
“I will… see you tomorrow?” Mako suggested.
“Mako, could you step inside for a moment?” Wu asked. Mako nodded and went into the junior suite, and Wu closed the door behind him. “We have some privacy. Mako, could I kiss you?”
Mako stepped forward, deciding to take the plunge, and kissed Wu without answering aloud, and Wu was surprised but wrapped his arms around Mako’s neck, kissing back deeply.
It was deep and sweet, and they eventually parted.
“Wow,” Wu said. “You’re a better kisser than Hyuk.”
That made Mako smile, and he was sure he was showing a flush from the top to bottom.
“You could stay,” Wu said, and then paused as he wrung his hands together. “I don’t mean like that. Not specifically. We could just talk,” Wu said, then looked at him. “I’ve always loved talking with you, Mako.”
“I’d like that,” Mako said.
“Though kissing is something, I could also get used to.”
Mako smiled and pulled Wu in for another kiss.
Asami and Korra had prepared Mako for a lifetime of public relationship interest, but no-one had paid much attention.
After months of being Wu’s bodyguard, the papers didn’t pay much attention to Mako accompanying Wu to the zoo without any public displays of affection between them. It appeared they were just friends.
They’d go public in time, but for now they were happy as being explicit as they wanted in private.
It gave him time to tell Korra and Asami without the noise of the public, after Wu had gone back to Ba Sing Se.
Asami just nodded knowingly at him. Of course she’d known.
Korra had been surprised but quickly digested the bisexual information. The revelation he was dating Wu confused her more.
Mako assured her she’d understand in time when she got to know Wu more. But other than that, his friends were nothing but supportive.
Which he’d always knew they would be, but his friends were never the barrier for him to cross.
Mako decided to give him and Wu time before he told his wider family. They didn’t need to know at the moment exactly, especially when being in a relationship with Wu was so new.
And Chow and Tu and Yin remained at Asami’s in limbo between a new residence. Asami was always happy to have them.
The next time Wu visited Republic City, after a month of more romantic letter writing this time (Wu writing long letters, Mako’s answer still always short. Wu has abandoned ‘your friend’ in favour ‘love’), they were going to be upfront with the rest of the family.
They’d sat Yin down in one of Asami’s many grand rooms on the couch. He’d turned down Bolin’s offer of support, he just wanted to do this alone with Wu. Bolin would undoubtedly support them from then on anyway, his presence-- and opinion-- was always with Mako anyway, at the back of his mind.
She’d looked over at Mako, and then at Wu. “What?”
“We’re dating,” Mako said, as he and Wu stood side by side.
“But…” Yin looked to Mako. “You were his bodyguard, this is inappropriate.”
“I, we’ve come together as friends, Grandma,” Mako said.
“It’s abnormal for the monarchy, King Wu,” Yin said to Wu directly.
“Even if I wasn’t stepping down, I think rulers are best where they’re honest. I have nothing to hide from my subjects.”
Yin paused and looked over at them. “Well, as long as Mako isn’t being pressured,” Yin said directly to Mako.
“Grandma, I’m sure.”
“Well, Wu, I’m sure my grandson will make you very happy,” she said, then reluctantly again, “and I hope you make him happy as well,” as she tapped Mako’s shoulder thoughtfully. “Mako is very sensitive, and I’d hate to see his heart broken, Wu.”
Mako balked, and Wu smiled, and reached for Mako’s hand. “No, I’m going to treasure it.”
And Yin gave a small smile, but she wasn’t pleased. She wasn’t against it, but she wasn’t happy.
Mako knew Wu had lost her. She didn’t know what to think of the King who was giving it all up, in more ways than one. It was crushing for her as it was for him and Wu. He’d known how much his boyfriend had loved his Grandma, but his Grandma had always loved the idea of Wu.
Mako never liked the version of Wu his Grandma loved. He always preferred the real thing.
He’d left Tu and Wu in the gardens to help Chow with the multitude of tea cups they’d used, and he smiled at Mako. “Give Ma some time,” Chow said. “She needs time to adjust. She loves her family, but she’s old-fashioned.” It’s a statement that Chow has said before, but this time as if he realised how unfinished his previous conversation about the topic was, Chow decided to continue, “Mom and Dad couldn’t never understand San’s dreams for Republic City, you know, the city of the future as San saw it. He used to argue with them all the time, like how they legalised gay marriage in Republic City and San was all for it.” Chow said.
It’s a casual statement, but it made Mako’s heart skip a beat as he digested the information, and he still let out a small smile as Chow nodded at him a smile present on his Uncle’s face as well. No more words needed to be said on that matter, so Mako continued, “he always had Republic City in his sights.”
“He did. He used to go on about Republic City, and get into why it was great.” And then exhaled. “So much has been lost now that he’s gone.”
“Yeah,” Mako admitted. “I find myself often thinking of what could have been.”
“So do I. I wish I could ask him why he didn’t write to me, even if he didn’t want to speak to Mom and Dad he had me, I...” Chow trailed off, and his face twisted and Chow dropped the usually calm and affable mood he customarily wore for just a moment. “Maybe I didn’t support his dreams enough,” Chow said, and that was it. So many what-ifs and unanswered questions present for their lives, and nothing that could really be done to fix it.
Chow brought himself back to composure. “But he would have been proud of you. And Bolin. You’ve both grown up to be fine men.”
Mako relaxed. “I have been told.” Mako mused,
It’s taking time, but he’s letting himself believe it, too.
It’s drizzling lightly and Mako wished they had picked a better day, but you can’t ever control these things.
Wu knelt down by his parents’ marble marker and smiled at it. “It’s really nice.”
Mako laid flowers and looked at Wu. “Yeah, this is them.”
“Right,” Wu said, and he bowed his head.
It’s silent, and at the shrine Mako wished he had his parents with him, so they could meet Wu, and if there were any issues, they could talk it out instead of burying them within him and ignoring the present.
Mako would be a very different person from the one standing at their shrine today, though, if his parents were here.
He’s accepted that now, even if it still hurt. It probably always would.
It had taken Mako until now to realise he had kept the promise, and was still doing so, and that it was so unfair for him.
Wu looked deep in thought, and Mako didn’t want to disturb him, so they stood in silence.
Mako instead thought of the time he and his parents had together. He couldn’t remember much anymore, but Mako had been happy. And that was enough.
Mako felt Wu thread his hand into his, and it disturbed Mako’s thoughts.
Wu smiled at him. “I hope I didn’t disturb you.”
“No, you didn’t.”
Wu squeezed his hand, and they left the cemetery, a drizzling rain falling down; Mako lifted his umbrella over him and Wu, who still appeared to be deep in thought.
“What were you thinking?” Mako asked. “If you want to tell me.”
Wu paused. “I was promising them that I’d cherish your heart as long as you let me have it.”
It was such a sweet statement, and it made Mako’s heart flutter. He wrapped his arm around Wu, relishing in the emptiness of the cemetery and the privacy it gave them.
They’d go public soon, but for now, their current situation was brave enough for them.
And as they left the graveyard, Mako turned back to the gravestone. He made a promise to himself that he’d try and centre himself and his own happiness.
That is a promise that he was finding easier to keep.
—
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