Chapter Text
"Tabby do I need to worry that Zsasz is going to hunt us or more importantly me down for us pulling a job in town without a license yet, because that would really suck." Tabitha looks at me for a quick second before looking back at the road
"Selina I am hurt you would think such a thing, and I'm not scared of Zsasz! maybe a little concerned at how much of a pain he could be but not scared!" I roll my eye and sigh heavily
"yes you aren't scared of him but I am! just cuz you are likely able to handle him doesn't mean I can, so yea again I ask are we going to be hunted down for this job we are pulling without a license from Penguin?"
"Selina, what makes you think all of this? I mean who said we were going out to pull a job or anything? and we did show up to the Penguin's party and prove that we are going to play ball. and us not having a license yet is just paperwork filing and such we will have it in a day or two tops, Penguin just whats us to sweat it out to try and show us who is in charge bullshit." really just who does Tabby think she is trying to foul.
"ok then so you're saying we aren't in a stolen car heading off to a job? then why is it that we have blown through three red lights and at least five." I look out the window "now six stop signs and your whip and other tools are in the back seat." I can almost hear Tabby's teeth grind as I point all this out.
with a big sigh, Tabby slows the car down and looks at me out of the corner of her eye "fine I do have a small job to do it's nothing illegal it's just a delivery job and you know me I always overpack to be on the safe side of things. so no need to worry about Zsasz or any of Penguin's goons coming after you or me. does that make you happy and put your mind at ease little cat?"
I lick my bottom lip "ok so a small-time delivery job. what about the high-end stolen car we are driving around in?" I feel the car getting back up to speed
"Selina, you have gotten very uptight since the party at Penguins is there something you would like to talk about instead of worrying about every little thing? and for the record, this car isn't stolen it's borrowed because if you remember I was once rich and have contacts that are still well off, and asking for a car to use from time to time is an easy favor to ask. so just relax and enjoy the ride in silence unless there is something that's bugging you from when you walked away from the party the other night and came back in a mood?" I bite my lower lip softly and go back to watching things pass by the window "yea that's what I thought you would say. teenagers!"
for 15 minutes we keep driving in silence till I notice out the window that we are leaving the border of Gotham and the passing scenery is just all too familiar "Umm Tabitha just who is this client we are making a delivery for?" Tabitha tightens her grip on the steering wheel
"I'm pretty sure you can guess who the client is if you're asking when we are almost there."
"TABITHA WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK YOU TOOK A JOB FROM MY EX...FRIEND!" the car screeches to a halt and I hit my head on the dash
"Selina you really can't even admit how you felt or still feel about that silly boy. you two have been on again and off again for what seems like forever now and didn't even separate when Silver tried to break you two up. but if you do really hate him so much you can just stay in the car or hell you can get out here."
she pulls the car over so fast we both jerk in our seats "well Selina now is a time to make a choice are you getting out here or staying in the car and being a scaredy-cat out at the drop-off? you will need to sometimes make drops or even have meetings with those we hate or wish we could kill but you still need to bite down and bear it or lose out on a good opportunity!" damn it this is just another damn test of hers. I wasn't expecting every single test of her's to be pass or fail, but more to teach me the ropes and help me work up to bigger and better things, not just pushed into the deep end of things and hope to figure it out before things go to hell. taking a deep breath and centering myself as best I can, looking into her eyes
"I can do this drop and not wuss out on you partner." she smiles at me and the car takes off
"That's a good kitty cat" I HATE WHEN SHE CALLS ME THAT!!!
as we pull up to bruce's oversized house I can see Alfred outside by the door waiting. taking a few deep breathes I put my game face on and step outside the car with Tabby and go around to the trunk. once it's open I see two boxes with Wayne Enterprises stamped on the side's "I thought this wasn't one of those jobs Penguin is going to kill us for. stealing from Wayne Enterprises isn't the best side job."
Tabby just giggles and shakes her head "Selina I know you know who lives here and who owns the company these boxes come from so how is it stealing if I'm just bringing the owner something that is already his hmm?" well I could poke so many holes in her understanding of what she just said. Seeing as I have helped said billionaire jerk face steal many different things from his own company, but if I were to do that we would end up being here for longer than I care to so I just smile and grab the two boxes out of the trunk and follow her to the house.
"Ms. Galavan good to see that you could get the job done."
"Please call me Tabitha and it's a very rare thing when I'm not able to get a job done." if I didn't know any better I could swear she was using her flirty voice and even winked at the butler. but no that's just crazy thinking
"Ms. Kyle it is always a pleasure. shall I take those for you?"
"no it's alright I got it Jeeves. but it is nice to see that you are alright." he smiles at me as he opens the door and we all go inside
"you may place the boxes just on that side table Ms. Kyle. I will go gather master Bruce." I do as Alfred says and stand next to Tabby to wait for the jerk face to show up
"Selina stop fidgeting so much we need to look professional here. not you just sneaking over to see your boyfriend giddiness." I hiss at her saying he wasn't my anything before or now.
waiting around for what feels like forever, but I know it's only been a minute or two at most. I can't stand still and walk around by the door till I hear rushed footsteps coming downstairs, and this way and that's about the time my stomach filled with butter fly's as I see him and hear "Selina it's nice to see you again. I'm so glad you could make it"
"yea well a job is a job even if it's for a guy who can be a bit of a jerk face at times." at the moment I finished that Bruce looks at me as if I had two heads. It was at this point that it hit me that the bad feelings in the car here weren't my fears of Zsasz hutting me and to a lesser degree Tabby. but said best friend and mentor Tabby was trying to get me back together with my EX!!! AHHH!!!!!
I try to make a run for the door but there she is again butting into my life where she shouldn't. Tabby stops me from opening the door and locks something onto my wrist and she pulls a small device out of her pocket and turns it on and I feel a shocking sensation from the device on my wrist "WHAT THE FUCK TABBY!!!" Bruce comes to my side and seems concerned but I push him off me and rush at Tabby again just to get shocked again.
"ok, Selina now just calm down and don't get too close to this device in my hand. What I have locked around your wrist is a radio-frequency electronic shock collar and this one in my hand is the teether. Works a lot like the ones rich people use on their pets to keep them on the property, but with my own added twist, you can't get within one meter of the device in my hand or outside of 50 meters. As well as a much worst shock if you try to take it off without the key I have on my person to take it off. but let's not dwell on that right now Bruce as you can see I have done my part and brought you one lost kitty cat for the night so if you will come with me outside for a minute I will be off."
Tabby gave me a wink and opened one of the doors and places the leash as it was in front of the other, as she left with Bruce and Alfred close behind Bruce saying he was sorry. I'm not sure if I should be more pissed off or impressed with how Tabby did all this to me? I'M GOING WITH PISSED OFF!!!! I move to open the door to follow and yell at her just to get shocked again FUCK THAT STINGS! I lean back and use my foot to open the door but it only opens slightly, but I can at least hear what's going on outside now if not get outside "Tabitha what the hell this wasn't what I asked you to do, I just wanted you to bring Selina here so I could give her a late birthday present, not kidnap her and drag her here."
"Master Bruce please calm down and let Ms. Tabitha explain herself. after all, everyone here does know how challenging Ms. Kyle can be." that's a little harsh Jeeves if also true.
"Thank you so much Alfred for at least being willing to let me explain. I really don't have much else to tell you other than this was the easiest way to get Selina here and for her to stay till you two can talk, because we all know she has a bad habit of running from her feelings when she gets cornered." BITCH!!!!!!! don't tell my ex... I mean Bruce such things. "now I would like my payment please." I can hear both of the guys sighing and I try not to giggle at how this whole thing is working out.
"Fine I will try to not let Selina kill me over something that is out of my hands, but the tab at Tony's pizzeria you have built up is taken care of and a safe house for the two of you is all set. Zsasz will have more trouble finding you let alone getting in this time. and your dinner and entertainment plans for the night Alfred has set up for you." I can hear Bruce unable to hide his laughter.
"Master Bruce, what is going on here? Ms. Tabitha, please halt and desist from your action at this moment!" ok now that has my full attention. I reach with my foot and close the door and run to the nearest window and open it wide to see Alfred being pulled by Tabby's whip that's wrapped around his waist screaming to Bruce for help
"hang in there Jeeves Tabby is like a Blackwidow she kills her mates after she is done with them."
Tabby just flips me the bird and yells. "behave little kitty cat and don't do anything I wouldn't do!"
Bruce waves at me as he heads for the door and I close the window and meet him at the door. he picks up the device from the floor and places it on a side table near the door. "So seems that my keeper has kidnaped your keeper and locked me up in your oversized house so what should we do then? Two teens, house to themselves want to go put on Netflix and chill?" Bruce gulps hard and turns beet red.
"Well I mean if that's what you would rather do sure but there is dinner first if you are hungry?" I had almost forgotten how much fun it was to pick on Bruce.
"Yea sure I could eat. what did Jeeves leave for us to eat?" Bruce grabs the boxes that we had delivered I am guessing that hold more of his company's secrets he is trying to bring to light blah blah blah when he looks up at me.
"Alfred didn't make anything I made everything again like the last time you had stood me up on our date." oh god will he never let that go.
once inside the kitchen I smell something that almost makes my mouth drool...almost! I sit at the table as Bruce puts the boxes in the corner and pulls a big pot onto the table and a plater with a cover. he goes to get bowls and spoons, and as his back is turned I try to open the plater to see what's in there. "Selina, you can wait for just a second cant you?" gah when did his ears get so good?
"yea, yea just hurry up already being held hostage is making me hungry." at my words he almost drops the plates as his knee slams into the table. oops, guess that struck a chord.
"Selina I had no clue that Tabitha was going to do this ok." pulling a bowl in front of myself and gave him a big smile.
"oh if I wanted to be mad at you then I could think of many different times you were acting like a douchebag than I can count, to be mad over not just for Tabby being Tabby!" I can see him sulk a little at what I say but it's only fair, to be honest with him as we are likely to be spending who knows how long together.
"Selina how many times do I need to say I 'm sor."
"Bruce just save it, you were a douchebag to me and you will likely be a douchebag to me later again so just own up to it, and let's eat whatever it is that you made ok." he gives me that same old stupid grin of his and takes the tops of the pot and plater to reveal.
"We have here spaghetto's and five-cheese grilled cheese sandwiches. enjoy and dig in." I give him a look. though it does smell amazing.
"Really all the money in the world at your fingertips and this is what you make?" he dunks one of the sandwiches into his bowl of food.
"Well if you don't want any guess that means more for me then, but I thought you would like it since we had it so many times when you were helping me understand Gotham's underworld." he reaches for the plater of sandwiches only to get hit hard by my spoon.
"Take my food away and suffer worst than you can ever imagine jerkface." we both laugh and eat up.
We eat mostly in silence but it does feel nice just being around him again, and the food did taste as good as it smelled. Bruce takes the dishes to the sink and then takes something out of the oven and places it on the table. "really Bruce cookies? and are these in the shape of cat heads with icing for whiskers?"
"Ok to be fair Selina I thought it would be kind of cute since your nickname since I have known you is cat, had I known that Tabitha giving you too much crap with your nickname bothered you I would have just made them into the normal chocolate chip cookies." wait a second did he say chocolate chip? I reach and take a huge melty bite out of one of them and hate to have to admit it I moaned from delight. Bruce only laughs at me and puts the two Wayne Enterprises boxes in front of me. "happy late birthday Selina!"
I look at him with I hope no chocolate on my face. "um Bruce what is this?"
"Selina don't worry I had these put together, Mr. Fox ensured me nothing was stolen and they are for you so just open them and tell me how much you hate them." damn it he does know me a bit too well. in the first box, there were a thing of goggles in the shape of a cat's eyes with red lenses. in the second box, there was a new leather jacket that I have to say was rather lightweight.
"Wow Bruce these are amazing and beautiful but not sure if they are Wayne Enterprises worthy though." he and I laugh.
"Well, the lenses in the goggles will help keep your eyesight in sharp contrast even in pitch black. It's not night vision but a really close second and if it gets bright fast you won't get blinded like with real night vision goggles. and the jacket I am told is made up of an experimental Kevlar weave it will stop knives and other such sharp objects from harming you and will even stop a handgun shot, though it will still hurt so please try to avoid it if you can." and my jaw just dropped did Bruce Wayne just give me a bulletproof jacket and night vision goggles to go out into Gotham to steal? WTF!
"Alright, there is one more gift left for you to see." Bruce stands and offers his hand to me. I take it so he can help pull me up, and grab another cookie on our way out of the kitchen. I slip the jacket on and get the goggles on the top of my head noticing how both just seem to fit perfectly. we get to his studies door. "ok Selina I need you to close your eyes and not open them till I say so." I nod my head yes. "Selina you have to promise you won't open your eyes till I say so and also put your hands over your ears too." frustrated I let out a sigh and promise him to cover my eyes and ears. placing my hands over my ears and shutting my eyes as Bruce opens the door and pulls me just inside and closes the door. after a few seconds of this, I am already getting fed up with doing as he asked but then I notice what sounds like Bruce making the kissing sound and saying where are you. what is he doing? after a little bit longer I feel a hand grab my elbow and pull my hand away from my ear. "you can open your eyes now Selina."
I open my eyes to see Bruce holding the tiniest little black kitten ever, it could fit into the palm of my hand. "Bruce? who is this tiny little thing? and what's up, you already got me this amazing jacket and goggles." as I'm about to keep up my questions the tiny little things meows ever so cutely and my heart just melts. Bruce cradles the kitten like it's a baby and shushes it softly.
"Everything is ok little one your new mommy is just surprised by how cute you are." at his words the kitten lets out a very happy purring sound and kneads at his arm. I can't help but reach over to try and pet the cute kitty, only to have it pawing at my fingers before jumping out of Bruce's arms and toward me. scrambling to catch it but the little thing just climbs up my new jacket and starts to nuzzle into the side of my face as it lays on my shoulder.
Bruce chuckles at this "and it seems you really are her human now so no takes backsies, Selina." I give him the best glare I can muster well having the kitten purring softly next to my head. sighing softly and sitting down so if the little girl falls it will be onto the couch.
"Ok so you got me a kitten, an extremely adorable yet forceful for affection kitten, does that seem like something a street girl should really be taking care of? I mean look how little she is Bruce. what if something bigger tries to eat her out there?" at this said little kitten has stopped its purring and climbed down my arm just to put its claws into my hand and pounce over the coffee table into Bruce's lap on the other couch. I have to say that was both painful and skillfully done, the little scamp
"Selina doesn't say such mean things to your new baby she is sensitive about such things aren't you little one." as he starts to pet her again she starts up her purring well looking right at me with slitted eyes. "and as for your being scared she may get hurt. Isis can stay here and have the run of the mansion. and her human mother can stop by and do the same anytime she likes!" did Bruce just get me a late birthday gift that will force me to stop over to his oversized house all the time to see him.... I mean her.
"Wait what did you call her?" a loud meow aches through the room.
"Isis, it's her name she is a black Egyptian Mau."
"Umm is that meant to mean something, Bruce? because all that makes her sound is more expensive. wait how much did she cost?
"Well, the woman I got her from is known to breed animals that can be on the costly side." oh my god just how much of his money did he spend on me? "but before you get all uptight about it Isis didn't cost me a thing. after a sit down with miss Patience Phillips she told me that her cat Midnight had a little of kittens not long ago and that there was one just waiting for the right owner to come along. and I know this will sound nuts but." he laughs "I had to be interviewed by the cat Midnight. I sat and told Midnight and miss Phillips about the reason I was looking for a kitten and who it would be for and after I was done Midnight walked away and came back with this little beautiful little kitten I was told named Isis. and well she kind of reminds me of you so I thought you two would be purrfect together."
I roll my eyes at how he ended that crazy little story. "and just how am I and Isis alike hmm Bruce?" he starts to pet Isis and she playfully bites and claws his hand.
"Well as you can see she has a strong personality, can be known to throw little fits if things don't go her way, as well as whipping people with her tail from time to time as well, and she always loves to be given food!" ok so maybe some of those things describe how I can act a little bit.
I hold my hand out "Isis come to mommy." the little shit just sits curled up in Bruce's lap purring. hmm ok, yea seeing more similarities between us. "ok fine, please come to me you little cutie." and she does and the heart string's keep melting. "so she is a rare breed then?" he gives me his dorky smile
"About as rare a breed as Isis's human is." and I throw a pillow at him for being such a dork. I rub under Isis's chin
"So shall we give this little girl a workout then?" Bruce moves over to his desk and pulls out the bunch of toys.
"So do you want the laser pointer or the mouse on a fishing pole?" I put Isis down on the couch and leap for the laser pointer. we play with Isis for a few hours until we all feel sleepy and crawl into Bruce's bed. he's on his back with me curled up next to him my head on his chest and Isis right next to my face, have to say this wasn't what I thought was going to happen tonight.
IT WAS FAR BETTER THAN ANYTHING I COULD HAVE DREAMED OF!!!!