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Castiel slammed to the ground, the place he had chosen to land one he knew no one would think to look- the place that Dean had been buried. He fell to his knees and let his head fall, along with the tears of disappointment and complete deviation. He… he didn't remember.
Cas thought back to the months that had been spent with him, repairing him from all of the damage that had been inflicted on from his time in hell. But… What he thought most of, was how the two of them had fallen in love. Not that it mattered now… He had – he had forgotten everything.
Sobs wrecked his body as he thought of this. The pain. The pain was something he had never felt before. It tore through him, made him forget everything else. The apocalypse. The seals. The danger. Damn he even forgot what he was; an angel of the Lord.
None of that mattered though. He had lost the only one that had ever truly made him feel happy made him feel… Less alone than he had ever been. It was there that you let out all of the pain all of the heartbreak that he knew would happen because of this. However painful he knew that it was necessary for him to forget. He couldn't remember his time in heaven he couldn't it was against the rules. Still it hurt… it hurt worse than holy fire, worse then The wrath of God. Damn even worse then he imagine falling would feel... The tears fell down, hot fast and heavy has he thought about the pain he knew that he would feel just by being around him… Around the love that had forgotten all about him.
There he sat, crying his tears of anguish for longer than anyone have realized. But he knew that he had to go on, he knew what must be done – Dean was the only one that could save anyone, help everyone. He lifted his head, his teeth clenched tightly, and then and there he vowed to try and make him remember try to make Dean remember all the times that they have had together of… The love that they had felt for one other. But until he remembered he knew that he had to keep a straight face. Had to hide what you truly felt, so that Dean would be able to save the world- be able to save himself.
He knew that it would be the hardest thing he's ever done, but he knew that it had to be done, he knew that it would hurt, hurt more than anything had ever hurt but he knew we had to do it. For Dean- he had to do it.