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Natasha had noticed Wanda becoming more and more withdrawn over the past few weeks, and it was starting to worry her. It had been six months since she had joined the team and she seemed to be doing well, getting better and better at training every day. Her relationship with the rest of the Avengers was still rocky at best, they still didn’t trust her, but Wanda was always open with Natasha. Which is why it was immediately obvious to Natasha when the witch started closing herself off again, she doubted any of the others had even noticed. Natasha couldn’t figure out what would make Wanda close off like this. She hadn’t had any nightmares in the past few weeks, and nothing had gone wrong on any missions. Natasha hoped she hadn’t personally done anything to upset Wanda, because if she had she didn’t know what it was, which meant she couldn’t correct it. It wasn’t until she walked in on Tony and Steve discussing plans for the next few weeks that she realised what was affecting Wanda.
“Well, it’s Valentine’s this weekend so Pepper and I are going away.”
Steve frowned.
“Don’t we have that meeting on 15th?”
Tony gave Steve a blank look before questioning FRIDAY.
“FRI, when is the meeting with Fury?”
“Meeting with Director Nick Fury scheduled for 23rd February. Miss Potts took the liberty of moving it from 15th to 23rd so you could spend Valentine’s weekend together.”
Natasha stopped in the kitchen doorway. Of course. February 15th was the twins’ birthday, and this would be Wanda’s first birthday without Pietro, how could she have forgotten that? She still had four days to figure something out, that was doable. She decided not to involve the other Avengers, they still didn’t know Wanda’s birthday, and Natasha had no intention of telling them. Wanda would be turning 16, a milestone her brother would never reach, so Natasha wanted to make sure she was okay over the course of the day. Making a split-second decision she stepped into the kitchen, interrupting whatever Tony was going to say next.
“Are you only gone for the weekend?”
Tony turned to her, a small smirk on his face.
“Probably. We’re going to Venice, so we might stay a little longer. Why, do you have any special plans?”
Tony wiggled his eyebrows at her, while Steve looked mildly interested.
“No, just looking forward to a quiet weekend.”
“Why don’t we just cancel training for the weekend? Tony’s not going to be here, Clint is going home for the weekend, and I was thinking about spending the weekend in the city.”
Natasha had never been more grateful for Steve in her whole life.
“Good idea, Cap. FRIDAY, can you make sure everyone knows it’s a free weekend, and they don’t have to stick around if they don’t want to.”
“Of course, Miss Romanoff.”
“Well, I’ll see you boys later.”
Natasha turned and headed out the kitchen and up to her room. She decided to stop off at Wanda’s room first, wanting to check up on her. She knocked lightly on the door, not wanting to disturb Wanda if she was sleeping.
“Wanda? It’s Natasha, can I come in?”
Natasha waited for a few seconds, almost ready to knock again when the handle clicked, and the door opened slightly. Taking this as an invitation Natasha stepped inside, not surprised to see swirls of red retreating back to where Wanda was sat on the bed. Natasha shut the door behind her and stepped further into the room.
“FRIDAY said training is cancelled this weekend?”
Natasha nodded, taking in Wanda’s appearance. She had clearly been crying, and there were dark circles under her eyes as though she hadn’t slept last night.
“Yeah, from Friday. It’s Valentine’s weekend and Clint, Steve and Tony are all gonna be gone for the weekend, so Steve decided to just cancel it for the weekend.”
Wanda glanced towards her momentarily before turning her gaze back to the window.
“Steve has plans for Valentine’s Day?”
Natasha shrugged, not at all pleased at how emotionless Wanda’s voice sounded.
“He said he was spending the weekend in the city; I don’t know if he has plans specifically for Valentine’s.”
“Okay, that sounds nice for him.”
Wanda still hadn’t properly torn her gaze away from the window, so Natasha made her way further into the room and sat down next to her on the bed, leaving enough space between them for Wanda to be comfortable.
“You doing okay?”
Wanda shrugged.
“Just tired, I did not sleep well last night.”
Natasha frowned.
“You know you can come to me if you have a nightmare, right?”
Wanda shook her head, her lips tilting upwards in a sad sort of smile.
“No nightmare. Just…restless.”
“You can still come to me, detka, I don’t mind.”
“Thanks, Tasha. I think I will try to nap before dinner, I am very tired.”
Natasha nodded; she knew she wouldn’t get any more out of Wanda just yet. She was reluctant to bring up the topic of Wanda’s birthday and how she felt about it, wanting Wanda to bring it up herself in the hope that opening up would help.
“Okay, detka. If you’re not up already, I’ll make sure you’re awake for dinner.”
Natasha stood and looked down at Wanda for a moment. She looked so small and dejected. Natasha reached a hand out, running her fingers through Wanda’s hair. Wanda leaned into the touch, and Natasha thought she saw Wanda’s bottom lip begin to tremble, but she didn’t draw attention to it. Natasha pressed a light kiss to Wanda’s forehead and stepped back.
“Have a good nap, dorogaya.”
As Natasha left, Wanda pulled a blanket over herself, but Natasha doubted she would be getting any sleep. Wanda did not sleep especially well at the best of times, let alone with an event such as her first birthday without Pietro looming ever closer.
The next three days passed in much the same fashion. Wanda only emerged from her room for training, and Natasha was sure she was the only person who noticed how the circles under her eyes were darkening by the day, her movements becoming more and more sluggish. Natasha doubted Wanda had slept at all in the past few days, and she certainly wasn’t eating enough. If Natasha hadn’t been taking food to her, she didn’t think Wanda would’ve eaten at all. Natasha tried to comfort Wanda as much as she could, but it was hard when Wanda still hadn’t told her what was bothering her. Natasha knew, of course, but she wanted Wanda to tell her herself. She was getting better, but still had trouble telling someone when something was wrong or something had upset her, a by-product of her time with HYDRA.
Friday 14th brought quiet to the Compound. Tony and Pepper had left at 4am to be in Venice in time for breakfast, Clint had left late the night before, and Steve had left straight after he had eaten breakfast saying he was going to stay in a safe house in Brooklyn for the weekend. Natasha wished him well and went back to sipping her coffee. It was just her and Wanda in the Compound now, and Natasha was inclined to let her be for now, hopefully she was sleeping.
“FRIDAY? Is Wanda asleep?”
“Indeed, Miss Romanoff. She has been asleep for 2 hours and 37 minutes. Would you like me to wake her?”
“No thank you, FRI.”
2 hours and 37 minutes. Counting back Natasha realised that Wanda had not fallen asleep until a little before 6am. Worry filled Natasha as she realised that Wanda’s mental state this weekend was going to get worse before it got better. Natasha would let Wanda sleep until lunchtime and then attempt to get her to eat something. Natasha decided to make pirozhki for lunch, hoping that familiar food would encourage Wanda to eat a little bit more. Natasha decided to make both sweet and savoury pirozhki in case Wanda had a preference.
Natasha had just finished making the fillings when FRIDAY alerted her.
“Miss Maximoff appears to have woken, Miss Romanoff.”
“Thanks, FRI.”
Natasha dried her hands and made her way upstairs. She was hoping she could get Wanda to help her finish the pirozhki, hopefully keeping her hands busy would distract Wanda. Natasha knocked lightly on the door, waiting for Wanda to respond. As usual, a wisp of red magic opened the door for her. Natasha stepped in, closing the door behind her. Wanda was lying in bed, staring listlessly at the ceiling.
“Morning, detka. How did you sleep?”
Natasha kept her voice soft, not wanting to startle Wanda. Wanda turned her head slightly to look at her, her eyes already shimmering with tears. Natasha swiftly made her way over to the bed, sliding under the covers next to Wanda.
“Hey, hey, I’m here, it’s alright.”
Wanda rolled over slightly, burying her face in Natasha’s neck. Natasha brought her arms around Wanda and began running a hand through her hair, gently untangling any knots. Natasha didn’t say anything, she just let Wanda cry knowing she had probably been bottling up her feelings for the past few weeks. Eventually, Wanda’s tears tapered off, leaving her sniffling quietly. Natasha pressed a kiss to the top of her head.
“Feeling better?”
“A little.”
Natasha’s heart broke at how defeated Wanda sounded. Natasha hugged her just a little bit tighter, knowing that nothing she could do would truly make Wanda feel any better.
“I’m making pirozhki for lunch. You wanna come help me?”
Wanda nodded against her neck but did not move. Natasha was content to let Wanda be for as long as she needed, there was no rush to do anything this weekend. After a while, Wanda untangled her fingers from where they had been wrapped in Natasha’s shirt and sat up, wiping her eyes.
“I…sorry.”
Natasha smiled softly, brushing a bit of Wanda’s hair behind her ear.
“You’ve got nothing to be sorry for, dorogaya. Now, time for you to get dressed. I’ll be in the kitchen.”
Uncertainty flared in Wanda’s eyes before it quickly disappeared, something Natasha filed away to think about later.
“Okay, I will be there in a few minutes.”
Natasha nodded and made her way back to the kitchen. She was extremely worried about Wanda; she still hadn’t said anything to Natasha about Pietro or her birthday, and at this point she probably wouldn’t if Natasha didn’t bring it up first. Natasha busied herself getting everything ready to finish making the pirozhki, she really hoped this plan worked in distracting Wanda.
About ten minutes later Wanda came shuffling into the kitchen, wearing leggings and a baggy red jumper that used to belong to Natasha, her arms wrapped around her stomach. Natasha watched, concerned, as Wanda rounded the table and came to a stop in front of her, looking incredibly unsure. Slowly, Wanda unfurled her arms and looped them around Natasha’s waist, tucking her head under Natasha’s chin. Natasha almost felt her chest would crack in two with sympathy as she returned Wanda’s hug, pulling the young girl more firmly against her. She heard Wanda let out a soft sigh of relief and lean more fully against her. It pained Natasha that Wanda was still so hesitant when seeking physical comfort, as if Natasha would ever reject her when she so clearly needed it.
Natasha let the soft silence permeate the kitchen, content to stand there as long as Wanda needed. She realised she’d stand there forever, holding the fragile witch, if that’s what Wanda wanted. It should’ve scared her, how protective she had become of Wanda in such a short space of time; instead, it just felt as though a long-forgotten puzzle piece was slotting back into place, and she felt almost complete for the first time since Ohio. She knew Wanda could never replace Yelena, the same way she could not replace Pietro, but this was enough for both of them.
“You wanna talk about it, malen’kiy?”
“It’s our birthday tomorrow. It hurts.”
Wanda’s whisper was so quiet that Natasha wouldn’t have heard it if they’d been any further apart.
“I know, little witch. I’m sorry.”
“Everything feels empty. I do not know how to make it better.”
Natasha hummed.
“I don’t think you can, detka. It’ll get better as time passes, but right now it’s just going to hurt a lot. And it’ll hurt tomorrow, and the day after, and every day after that. This kind of thing hurts forever, but it will get easier to manage. You’ve got to take it one day at a time. So today, we’ll make pirozhki and then tomorrow we can remember Pietro and celebrate his memory. And then on Sunday, who knows.”
“That sounds nice.”
Wanda unwound her arms slowly, as though reluctant to let go of Natasha. She moved over to where Natasha had all the food ready and actually seemed a little bit excited at the thought of pirozhki, something Natasha was extremely grateful for. They got to work in comfortable silence; Natasha filling the sweet ones while Wanda worked on the savoury. It was nice in a weird sort of way, Natasha thought, to just be able to do something calm, and not have to worry about anything except the person she was with. She couldn’t remember the last time she had allowed herself to just be. Once the pirozhkiwere assembled, Natasha put them all on trays and into the oven.
“Come on, we have a while ‘til they’re done.”
Natasha grabbed Wanda’s hand and led her over to the living room. She sat on the sofa and directed Wanda to sit between her legs on the floor.
“Do you want me to braid your hair?”
Wanda nodded, glancing back at her briefly with a small smile. Natasha began running her fingers through Wanda’s hair, not braiding it right away and instead just playing with it lightly. She scratched her nails lightly across Wanda’s scalp, smiling softly to herself when she felt the teenager relax against her a little bit. Braiding hair had been one of the first things they learnt to do in the Red Room; Natasha could still remember clumsily trying to braid her own hair at six years old before one of the older Widows had taken pity on her and taught her how to do it properly. It had been one of the only ways the Widows could comfort each other after hard days, decompressing by playing with and braiding each other’s hair. But luckily, the memories were not tainted in the way some of the others were from the Red Room, instead it just reminded her of safety and comfort. She hoped she could pass that on to Wanda as well.
“How many do you want?”
“Just one, please”
Natasha began sectioning Wanda’s hair, humming a Russian lullaby as she did so. Wanda sighed, leaning back against Natasha slightly.
“Mama used to sing us that song when the bombs were too close.”
Natasha stopped humming abruptly.
“I don’t mind. It is nice…reminds me of home, of Pietro.”
Natasha started the humming up again; the melody having been ingrained in her memory for longer than she could remember.
“Will you tell me about Pietro, what was he like?”
Wanda sighed.
“He was always protective of me, even when we were really little. He said that being 12 minutes older meant he got to protect me from everything, he took the blame whenever we got in trouble with our parents, even if it was my fault.”
“I think that’s just an older sibling thing, I tried to do the same with Yelena. What else?”
“His favourite colour was blue, he said it reminded him of the time our parents took us to a lake, before things got bad. It was in the summer and the sky was so clear, it made the lake look like it went on forever. He told everyone his favourite food was pirozhki because that was what our parents could afford, but his real favourite was something we stole once; it was chewy and sweet, I don’t remember what it was called.”
“I’m sure we’ll be able to find it somewhere, we’ll just keep trying snacks until you find the right one, how does that sound?”
“I would like that. Do you want to hear more?”
Natasha leaned forward, placing a kiss on the top of Wanda’s head.
“I want to hear whatever you want to tell me, detka.”
“You know he never backed down from a fight. He used to fight with the other kids at school if they said something mean about our family. And he used to stand up to the HYDRA men if they got too close to me, they hurt him a lot when he did that, but he always said better him than me.”
Wanda’s breath hitched and Natasha paused in her braiding, leaning forward to hug Wanda.
“That is…that is why I was not surprised that he sacrificed himself for that little boy. It is who he was as a person, and I think that is why it hurts so much. I cannot be mad at him for doing something he has done countless times for me, not when he was protecting a child.”
Wanda crumpled against Natasha, her tears starting again. Natasha quickly tied off the braid and slid down behind Wanda, enveloping her in a hug and pulling her into her chest. Wanda curled against her, one hand once again tangling in Natasha’s shirt, the other clutched at her own.
“I’m sorry, I do not mean to be so clingy.”
“Shh, shh. You’ve got nothing to be sorry for, malen’kiy. Just let me know what you need, okay?”
“This is enough.”
Natasha nodded. She started humming the lullaby again, hoping it would help sooth Wanda. She wished there was some way she could take away Wanda’s pain, she was too young to have suffered this much hardship. Wanda cried almost silently against her, properly grieving for her brother for the first time since he had died.
“I have never been without him before; I don’t know who I am without him.”
“We can figure it together, detka. One day at a time, remember?”
Wanda nodded against her, her fingers now idly playing with the fabric of Natasha’s shirt. Natasha rested her head on top of Wanda’s, absentmindedly noticing that she would not be able
to do that once Wanda finished growing; she was almost taller than Natasha as it was. The oven timer went off, alerting Natasha to the fact that their lunch was cooked.
“Come on, dorogaya, lunch is ready. Up we get.”
Wanda slowly unfurled, looking at Natasha hopelessly.
“I know, detka, I know.”
Natasha pressed a kiss to Wanda’s forehead, lingering for a moment before standing up, holding her hand out for Wanda.
“Come on.”
She pulled Wanda up and interlocked their fingers, squeezing slightly. Wanda gave a small squeeze back and tugged Natasha towards the kitchen. Natasha gave a small laugh, glad that Wanda was actually looking forward to eating something for the first time in two weeks. The pirozhki were delicious, and Natasha would be lying if she said she didn’t feel a little bit nostalgic eating them. It was clear Wanda felt the same, if the tear that slipped down her cheek at her first bite was any indication. They ate in silence, both lost in their own memories, but it was a comfortable silence.
They passed the rest of the day in comforting quiet. Natasha suggested that they watch some of Wanda’s favourite sitcoms, so most of the afternoon was spent watching The Dick Van Dyke show, something Natasha had not seen before. Natasha glanced over at Wanda during the fifth episode; she was curled against the arm of the sofa; arms wrapped around herself and had a small smile on her face even as tears streamed from her eyes. Making a split-second decision, Natasha propped herself against the arm behind her and swung her legs up onto the sofa.
“Come here, little witch.”
Wanda glanced over, eyes scanning Natasha, and slowly shuffled over. She hesitated, sat at Natasha’s feet. With a small huff, Natasha leant forward and grabbed Wanda by the hand, pulling her towards her. Wanda squeaked, not expecting it but settled against Natasha’s chest when the older woman wrapped her arms around her.
“You wanna grab a blanket, malen’kiy?”
“You don’t have to baby me, Tasha.”
Despite the slight snark, Wanda still used her magic to pull Natasha’s red blanket over them both.
“I’m not. You’re in for a tough few days, detka, you deserve to be comforted.”
Wanda pushed her face into Natasha’s neck, shaking with suppressed sobs. Natasha rubbed Wanda’s back; her lips pressed to the top of Wanda’s head.
“It’s alright, dorogaya. I’ve got you; I’ve got you.”
“Why are you so nice to me?”
Wanda’s voice was slightly muffled, but Natasha could still hear the brokenness of her tone.
“What do you mean, detka?”
“You are always making me feel better, why? I do not deserve it.”
Natasha sighed deeply. She knew it was mostly Wanda’s over emotional state that had made her ask this. Since she had come home with the Avengers, Natasha had worked had at making sure Wanda understood her worth, but it was slow progress, and at times like this Wanda always questioned everything.
“I’m nice to you because I like you and you deserve it, detka. I know you don’t always feel like it, and I know HYDRA did a lot of damage, but you deserve to be happy, and healthy, and loved. You’re an amazing person, Wanda. Life hasn’t been kind to you, little witch, but it’ll get better, I’ll make sure of it.”
“You…you like me?”
Natasha hated how insecure Wanda’s voice sounded. She tried to make sure Wanda always knew that she was not helping her out of obligation but rather because she wanted to, but Wanda still struggled accepting that sometimes.
“Of course I do, malen’kiy. Don’t tell Clint, but you’re my favourite Avenger.”
Wanda giggled slightly, and Natasha took it as a win.
“You’re my favourite too, Tasha.”
Natasha smiled, kissing the top of Wanda’s head again. Natasha continued running her fingers gently up and down Wanda’s back, smiling to herself when she felt Wanda relax against her more and more. Not long after, Natasha could tell that Wanda had fallen asleep, much to her relief. She really hadn’t been sleeping enough, and tomorrow would be hard enough for her as it was, let alone after not getting any sleep.
It was late enough that Natasha felt okay about just putting Wanda in bed, instead of waking her up only to go back to bed a few hours later. Natasha slid out from under Wanda with ease and picked her up. Wanda’s arm curled around her neck automatically, her head resting on Natasha’s shoulder. Natasha carried her up to her room with ease, Wanda was still far too light for her age and height, but that was a problem for another day. Luckily, Wanda hadn’t made her bed that morning, so Natasha gently set her down, pulling the covers over her, smiling as Wanda snuggled into them in her sleep. Natasha perched on the edge of the bed, letting her gaze settle on Wanda. Natasha couldn’t help but notice how much younger Wanda looked when she was asleep. Her eyes held so much pain and grief that it made her seem older than she was. Natasha trailed her fingers across Wanda’s brow, softly brushing a few loose hairs behind her ear. She learnt forward and pressed a kiss to Wanda’s cheek.
“Goodnight, detka, sleep well.”
Natasha was up with the sun the next morning, wanting to make sure everything went as smoothly as possible today, not that she was planning on them doing much. She was pretty certain that Wanda would not be up to doing much if anything at all. It was almost 9am before Wanda woke up.
“Miss Romanoff, it appears Miss Maximoff has just woken up.”
“Thanks, FRI.”
Natasha grabbed the present she had bought for Wanda from her desk and made her way across the hall. She knocked, and when she didn’t receive a response, let herself in.
“Wanda?”
If Natasha thought Wanda had been bad yesterday, today was a whole different story. Wanda looked almost catatonic lying on the bed. She had pushed the covers down to the end of the bed and was just staring at the ceiling, although Natasha could tell that she was not really seeing it, her mind was somewhere else. She set the present down on Wanda’s desk and sat on the opposite side of the bed. Wanda gave no reaction as Natasha observed her.
“Little witch?”
Something flickered in Wanda’s eyes, but it was gone as quickly as it came.
“What do you need?”
After a few seconds, the tiniest swirl of magic left Wanda’s hand and twirled between Natasha’s fingers. Inferring what Wanda was silently asking, Natasha linked their hands together, the magic still twined around their fingers and squeezed softly as she lay down next to Wanda. Wanda didn’t squeeze her hand back, but Natasha wasn’t expecting her to just yet. She squeezed Wanda’s hand in time with her breathing, hoping the rhythm would gradually bring Wanda back to awareness.
“One squeeze for no, two for yes, remember?”
There was no squeeze but the magic around their hands pulsed twice. Natasha wasn’t sure if Wanda was actively in control of her magic or if it was reacting subconsciously, but that would be something to investigate another day.
“Do you want silence?”
The magic pulse once, harshly.
“Shall I tell you a story?”
Two soft pulses this time. Wanda still hadn’t moved but at least she was responding.
“Okay, how about I tell you about when I first met Yelena?”
The two pulses of magic encouraged Natasha to continue.
“Well, we had actually already been in Ohio for three months before she got adopted. Dreykov decided that a family with two kids would stand out less, I think. I remember when Melina told me; I thought they were bringing another girl from the Red Room. But we went to this group home and Alexei and Melina said that Yelena was perfect. She scared me a little, at first. I’d never met someone outside the Red Room that I could remember, and I didn’t know how I was supposed to treat her. I tried to stay away from her at first, I was so scared of hurting this tiny little girl; she was so innocent in a way I couldn’t ever remember being. But she won me over. She was so sweet, and she seemed to just get me like no one ever has, even though we were just kids. By the end of that first year, she was my best friend, and I loved her with everything I had. Still do, actually. I hope she’s okay, whether she is.”
Natasha, who had been staring at the ceiling, almost flinched when a tendril of magic came up to her face, brushing against her cheeky gently. She raised her free hand to her face and was startled to find tears on her face, she hadn’t even realised she had been crying. She turned her head to look at Wanda, surprised but happy to find the girl looking back at her. Wanda was crying, but Natasha could see awareness coming back into her eyes now.
“Hey, malen’kiy, you doing okay?”
Relief flooded Natasha as she felt Wanda’s hand flex twice, what she was doing was helping.
“Another story?”
Two squeezes, stronger this time.
“Hmm…have I told you about my first July 4th after I defected?”
One squeeze.
“It made no sense to me. Everything was so over the top, and it was all so loud. I spent it with Clint at the farm with Laura, she was pregnant with Cooper at the time. Of course, we were taught to take pride in the motherland, but the Americans take it to a different level. All the shops were red, white, and blue, everyone decorated their houses. It was insane to me. And I had never seen fireworks before. Do you know what they are?”
One squeeze.
“It’s a colourful explosion in the sky. They look very pretty, but the noise is loud. I think Melina and Alexei purposefully took us away on holiday so we did not have to see them when we were kids. The first time I heard them I thought I was being shot at. It took me all night to calm down from the flashback I had. I still don’t really like them, but I can normally deal with them if I’ve got earplugs in. Sam doesn’t like them either, so I think Tony is building a soundproof room for when we celebrate.”
Wanda made a small noise in the back of her throat, causing Natasha to look over at her again. She looked like she was fully aware now. Natasha raised her free hand and brushed it lightly over Wanda’s cheek, smiling as Wanda leaned into the touch.
“Hey, detka. How are you feeling?”
Wanda’s hand twitched in Natasha’s.
“Not sure? That’s okay. Do you wanna stay here for now?”
Wanda nodded, squeezing Natasha’s hand twice as well. Natasha could see some hesitance in Wanda’s eyes as they searched Natasha’s face. She knew that look.
“You want a hug, dorogaya? You can ask, I’ll never say no.”
Wanda huffed, her eyes shimmering with tears, but she moved towards Natasha regardless. Natasha lifted their joined hands, allowing Wanda to tuck herself into Natasha’s side, their joined hands now resting on Wanda’s stomach. Wanda sighed, snuggling further into Natasha’s hold.
“Tasha?”
Natasha squeezed Wanda’s hand twice, noticing for the first time that there was still a thin trail of magic twisted around their fingers.
“I’m sorry I am not good at asking for things I need.”
“Oh, detka, that’s not something you need to be sorry for, it isn’t your fault. Besides, I’m pretty good now at figuring it out when you can’t tell me. We can work on it.”
Wanda sighed.
“I am 16 today, in maybe 90 minutes I think.”
Natasha hadn’t known that Wanda knew what time she was born.
“What time?”
“I was born at 3:13pm. Mama always said it was a magic number.”
Natasha didn’t ask about Pietro, he was only 12 minutes older, 3:01pm.
“FRIDAY, can you set an alarm for 3pm please?”
“Certainly, Miss Romanoff.”
“Shall we stay here today, malen’kiy?”
“Please?”
Natasha hummed and kissed the top of Wanda’s head. Natasha was glad she decided against trying to spend the day distracting Wanda; it probably would not have ended well, and at least this way Natasha could properly keep an eye on her.
“Tasha?”
“Yes?”
“What…what do you think happens to us after we die?”
Natasha was quiet for a few moments. What a loaded question. Natasha rather thought that growing up in the Red Room had laid to rest any notions about what came after you died. She’d seen many a young girl killed and disposed of at nothing more than a nod of the head. She wasn’t sure she really believed in anything anymore, not after brushing so close to death more times than she could count.
“When I was younger, in Ohio, Melina told Yelena a story once. One of her friends and daycare had died, I think it was cancer. But Yelena didn’t understand where he had gone, or why he wasn’t coming back. She told Yelena that the universe loved him too much, that it couldn’t stand for him to be away one second more and had brought him home early. She said he was playing amongst the stars, and that Yelena could see him any time she looked up at night, that she could even talk to him if she wanted, and that the shooting stars were him letting her know he was okay.”
Natasha could feel the collar of her t-shirt becoming damp with Wanda’s tears. Natasha also felt a little emotional at her own words. She often looked up at the night sky, hoping that, if Yelena hadn’t made it out of the Red Room, she was living out amongst the stars somewhere.
“Do you think we could go up to the roof tonight?”
“Of course, malen’kiy, anything you want.”
“How long until 3pm?”
Natasha looked at her watch.
“You’ve got 15 minutes, detka.”
Wanda hummed in contemplation.
“I should get dressed, yes? I think it would help me feel better.”
“If you want, I’ll wait here for you.”
Wanda smiled at Natasha and shuffled her way off the bed. Wanda grabbed some clothes from her closet and made her way into the en-suite. While she was gone, Natasha hopped off the bed and grabbed Wanda’s present from where it was on the desk. She also made the bed, hoping it would stop Wanda from crawling back into it.
“Miss Romanoff, it is now 3pm.”
“Thanks, FRI.”
Wanda emerged from the bathroom, wearing the same clothes as yesterday. She joined Natasha on the bed, curling into her side automatically. She pulled Natasha’s wrist towards her, watching the clock. When it ticked over to 3:01pm Wanda buried her face in Natasha’s shoulder, her tears flowing again.
“S dnom rozhdeniya, Pietro.”
Wanda echoed Natasha’s sentiment quietly, her voice thick with tears. She let Natasha’s wrist go, but Natasha kept an eye on the clock, not wanting to miss Wanda’s birthday. As the minutes ticked by, Wanda’s tears slowed to a stop until the only sound in the room was their slow breathing and the ticking of Natasha’s watch. Natasha placed her free hand on top of the present by her side, double checking she had wrapped it properly. When it hit 3:12pm, Wanda shifted so that her head was in Natasha’s lap, she was facing up but had her eyes closed. Natasha let a hand rest on her head, lightly running her fingers through Wanda’s hair. Her watch ticked to 3:13pm.
“S dnom rozhdeniya, little witch.”
Wanda’s eyes fluttered open, meeting Natasha’s gaze. Her eyes were shimmering, but no tears fell from them. Natasha picked up the small gift.
“I…I got you something. It’s only little, but it made me think of you both.”
Wanda sucked in a breath.
“If it’s too much for you today you can open it tomorrow, or whenever.”
“No, no, I would like to open it today. Please?”
Natasha passed her the little box, noticing that there was a slight tremble to Wanda’s hands. Uncertainty filled Natasha as she watched Wanda slide her finger under the folds of wrapping paper. She had tried to pick a gift that aptly represented Pietro as well as something that Wanda would like. Wanda pulled the wrapping paper off to reveal a ring box. She glanced up at Natasha.
“Go on, detka, you can open it.”
Wanda flipped the lid open, a quiet gasp escaping her when she saw what lay inside. The simple silver ring had been embedded with light blue stones, forming the shape of a lightning bolt. It was perfect.
“Tasha…”
“Do you like it?”
Wanda slid it onto the middle finger of her left hand.
“I love it! It’s so perfect, Tasha, thank you. It’s…it’s just right.”
Wanda’s emotions seemed to get the better of her again, and she turned her face into Natasha’s stomach, her arms wrapping tightly around her waist. Natasha let out a soft laugh and hugged Wanda as best she could in their awkward position.
“Come up here so I can hug you properly, dorogaya.”
Wanda obliged and threw her arms around Natasha’s neck, muttering thank yous in her ear. Natasha hugged Wanda tightly, glad her present had gone down well.
“I’m just glad you like it, malen’kiy, I wasn’t sure if you would want a present this year.”
“No, no, Tasha, I love it so much! I was not expecting anything, and this is so perfect. I can carry a part of him with me wherever I am now.”
“Exactly, detka.”
“What time does the sun set today, Tasha?”
“I think about half past five. You still wanna go out to the roof later?”
“Yes please. But first there is time for a nap? I slept a lot last night but I am still tired.”
“You do need to catch up on some sleep, don’t think I haven’t noticed those dark circles under your eyes.”
Wanda’s cheeks flushed with shame.
“I am sorry. This week has been hard.”
“I know, little witch, it wasn’t meant as a criticism. Come on, lie down.”
Natasha laid down next to Wanda, who was now looking at her with confusion.
“What are you doing?”
“I thought we were having a nap?”
A small crease appeared between Wanda’s eyebrows.
“You…you’re staying?”
“Mhmm, I could use a nap too.”
Natasha could see gratitude sparkling in Wanda’s eyes, but she didn’t say anything further. Natasha rolled onto her side and lifted an arm, wordlessly inviting Wanda to curl up against her. Within seconds she had her arms full of a newly 16-year-old.
“Will you do the lullaby again?”
With how quietly Wanda asked the question Natasha thought it almost sounded like Wanda was scared to ask.
“Of course, detka. Until you fall asleep.”
Wanda sighed, pressing further into Natasha so she could tuck her head under the older woman’s chin. Natasha began humming the lullaby; she didn’t even have to repeat it as Wanda had fallen asleep before she’d even begun the second verse. Natasha allowed her eyes to close, and she called out softly to FRIDAY.
“Set an alarm for 5pm please, FRI.”
“Of course, Miss Romanoff.”
Natasha awoke a few minutes before the alarm, pleased to note that Wanda was still fast asleep in her hold. She asked FRIDAY to cancel the alarm and began softly running her fingers through Wanda’s hair, not wanting her to awaken too abruptly. Wanda leant into the touch as she woke up, a smile tugging at the corners of her mouth.
“Hey there, sleepyhead.”
“Mmm, hi Tasha. What time is it?”
“Just gone five o’clock, malen’kiy. We have time to make some hot chocolate before we go up to the roof. It’s early enough that we can watch the sunset before the stars come out.”
“I would like that.”
“We gotta go to the kitchen to do that, detka.”
“But it is so comfy here.”
Natasha smirked a little at the thought that popped into her head. Without warning, she scooped Wanda up into her arms and hopped off the bed.
“Tasha! What are you doing?”
“We’re going to the kitchen.”
“Put me down.”
Even as Wanda said it, her arms came up to hold onto Natasha around her neck, indicating that she was quite happy where she was.
“I don’t think I will, how else would you get to the kitchen?”
Wanda let her head rest of Natasha’s shoulder as she made her way out into the hall.
“I can walk, you know. My legs are not broken.”
“This is more fun though, yes?”
“I suppose.”
Natasha felt Wanda smile against her shoulder, so she knew she was enjoying it really. When they got to the kitchen, Natasha gently set Wanda down on her feet and kissed her forehead.
“You wanna go get some blankets while I make the hot chocolate?”
Wanda nodded and flitted off to the living area to collect the multitude of blankets the Avengers always left lying around. Natasha made short work of the two hot chocolates and met Wanda at the elevator.
On the roof, Natasha directed Wanda on where to put the blankets. Two went on the floor, they had one each around their shoulders, and the biggest, fluffiest one across their laps. Wanda pressed close to Natasha, sipping slowly at her hot chocolate. Natasha’s eyes were fixed on the sunset, but she could feel Wanda looking at her. She left it alone for now, Wanda would say whatever it was when she was ready.
The sunset slowly changed as Natasha watched it, going from golden yellow to orange. She hoped it went straight from orange to pink, the glow of a red sunset often reminded her of the shade of lights in the Red Room. It appeared as if her luck had run out today as the sky slowly turned a vibrant red colour. Natasha couldn’t stop the automatic tensing of her muscles and she hoped that Wanda hadn’t noticed.
“Look, I match the sunset now.”
A wisp of red magic floated across Natasha’s vision, chasing away thoughts of the Red Room. A smile appeared on Natasha’s face as Wanda released more and more magic into the air, until strands of magic were weaving around them in nonsensical patterns, bathing them both in a soft red glow.
“So you do, detka. I think your magic might even be prettier than the sunset.”
Wanda smiled, and gradually dispelled the magic through the air. Natasha went back to watching the sky, the sun slowly dipping below the horizon. Wanda was looking at her again, and Natasha glanced at her, making eye contact when Wanda did not immediately look away.
“What is it, malen’kiy?”
“I…thank you for today, Natasha. I do not think I would’ve made it through this weekend if you had not been here to help me.”
Natasha pressed a kiss to Wanda’s temple and laced their hands together.
“I care about you, detka, and I knew this weekend would be difficult for you. I’m glad I’ve made it a little easier for you, though.”
Wanda squeezed her hand.
“I think Pietro would’ve liked you.”
Natasha felt tears prick at the corners of her eyes at Wanda’s soft admission. She often regretted that she had never had the chance to meet Pietro, and to hear that Wanda thought he would’ve liked her meant an awful lot.
“Really?”
Wanda nodded, smiling lightly.
“Yes. You take care of me, and make sure I have everything I need. You are also very kind and caring. You would’ve taken care of him the same way if I was not here, no?”
A tear slipped from Natasha’s eye. It wasn’t often she was complimented so freely with nothing expected in return.
“Of course, dorogaya, even if you were both here, I would’ve looked after you the same way.”
Wanda leaned her head against Natasha’s shoulder. With her free hand she pointed at the sky just off to the side of where they were sat.
“Look! The first star. Do you know which one it is?”
“I don’t know, we’ll have to wait for more to come out to find out what constellation it is.”
Natasha stared at the star Wanda had pointed out. It was shining very brightly against the dark blue sky. As she gazed at it, she made a promise to Pietro to take care of Wanda for as long as she could. Smiling, Natasha turned her attention to Wanda’s quiet chattering as she pointed out each new star she could see and hoped that Wanda had indeed had a good birthday, even if it couldn’t be spent with the boy who shared it.