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The atmosphere in the flat was heavy and it felt like time had stopped. Finley and Sophie had just left Dani’s apartment, leaving her and Gigi in shock. After what seemed like a long while of the two women standing in place, one by the windows and the other by the kitchen island, Gigi silently sprung into action. She walked to the table, grabbed her glass of wine and chucked it. She then walked to the sink, reaching under it to pull out a mop and a bucket. After filling it up she walked past Dani to make her way to the front door and put her shoes back on. Dani watched her move about purposefully and she knew what task Gigi had set out to do but for some reason she was unable to get her brain and body to do something to stop her. Only when Gigi opened the door was Dani able to form words. The voice that came out of her surprised her, it was small and it sounded like someone else’s.
“You don’t have to do that.”
Hearing her, Gigi turned around and looked at her. Dani seemed small and out of place in her own home. Gigi hated that sight.
“I know but I feel weird calling maintenance about… you know. I’ll just be a minute.”, Gigi finally said.
“I’m sorry.” was all Dani could say. She knew there was no point in trying to stop Gigi while she was clearly on a mission.
“I’ll just be a minute”, Gigi said again gently before leaving.
Dani heard her exit her flat. For what felt like forever she just stood there, a hand on the countertop. She didn’t realise she had been holding it so tightly until she decided to go clear the table. As she was walking towards it she noticed how much her hand hurt from the strength at which she had been holding the marble. As she cleared the table she noticed that being alone in her flat felt weird, almost wrong right now. That was something she hadn’t felt in a while and she hated that the two intruders made her feel that way. Pushing her feelings down she focused on clearing their now ruined romantic dinner and carefully put the leftovers in tupperwares before putting them in the fridge. As she was putting the last container away Gigi walked back in, quickly making her way to the sink. She emptied the bucket and rinsed it several times before reaching under the sink to grab some bin bags. Dani just watched her while leaning on the fridge.
“I’m assuming you don’t want to keep this mop.”, Gigi said as she turned around to look at Dani.
“Yeah, no.”
“Bin it is, then.”
“We could burn it.”
“Or… I put it in this bag, put the bag on the balcony and take it down when I leave?”
“Burning it sounds more fun.”
“You’re definitely more dramatic than I thought.”
This made both women laugh. A lot. Almost hysterically. It wasn’t that things were funny, realistically, things were pretty bad, but it was too late in the evening not to laugh.
“What the fuck was that?” Gigi managed to say in between fits of laughter.
“That was Finley. She loves a grand entrance.”, Dani replied, trying to regain her composure.
“Holy shit!”
After catching their breaths, silence fell again in the flat but, this time, they managed to find each other’s eyes. They sat comfortably in that silence for a bit.
“Is it okay if I take a shower before I leave?” Gigi asked.
“Yeah. Uhm, let me get some towels out for you.”
Dani made her way to the bathroom unaware that Gigi was following her closely. Gigi stopped at the bathroom door and watched as Dani was gathering items for her to use. Gigi noticed that the woman, usually so confident, was a little hectic and somehow confused about where her own things were.
After a while Dani stopped rummaging through the room: “Ok. You have towels and toiletries. Help yourself to anything you need, really. And shout if you need anything else.”
Once she was done talking she looked up at Gigi who hadn’t moved from her spot by the door. Gigi noticed that Dani’s breaths were short and all she could do at this moment was to smile at her, one of her gentle and warm smiles. She held Dani’s gaze and, without moving from where she was, said, “After I’m done getting Finley's urine off my body I’m going to fulfill the promise I made you earlier, is that okay?”
“I’d like that.”
“Great. Now let me get clean.”
But instead of leaving Dani stepped towards Gigi and kissed her. It was a small, tender kiss, that neither woman escalated. Dani then stepped back and looked at the smaller woman in front of her.
“Let me help you.”
With all the care in the world, Dani took Gigi’s sweater off. She then unhooked her bra before taking both her pants and underwear off in one motion. Her movements weren’t rushed and, through them, she tried to convey how grateful she was. When Dani reached Gigi’s socks both women let out a small laugh. The sight was comical but somehow, in all the ridiculousness of the evening, they both felt thankful for the presence and help of the other.
Once Dani was done with her job she gently stood back up: “I’m gonna go put these in a bag for you and you can borrow some of my clothes. Now go relax.” Dani gave Gigi a quick peck again before exiting the bathroom.
Gigi stepped into the shower and was grateful for the warmth it brought to what had been a very cold hour and half. She was almost done rinsing her hair when she noticed Dani standing by the door. Deep in thought, she hadn’t noticed the younger woman had come back. The two women met eyes and without words Dani started undressing in order to join Gigi in the shower. Gently Gigi opened the door to the shower and extended a hand out to Dani which she grabbed eagerly. Once she was in, Gigi quickly pulled her in the biggest hug. It was sudden and confident and only when they were holding each other did they release a breath none of them knew they were holding. They remained like that, finally breathing, for what felt like forever.
After getting out of the shower and getting dressed both women laid on Dani’s bed, facing each other. Dani’s eyes were closed and she was slowly falling asleep. When Gigi noticed that her lover’s breath was even she started to move out of bed. As she was sitting on the side, attempting to quietly stand up, she heard: “I don’t want you to go.” It stopped Gigi’s movements and she turned around only to find Dani in the same position as before but, this time, she was looking at her with big beautiful and hopeful eyes. For the second time tonight Gigi thought Dani looked small and it made her heart ache.
“I know you’ve never spent the night here before but I want you to stay. I like having you here. Please stay.”
“Okay.” was all Gigi said and she lied back down.
Once again, the two fell into comfortable silence and took the time to observe every inch of the other’s face.
“I really want to kiss you right now”, Dani said after a while and, with that, she did. This time the kiss was long and deep. Hands fell into their natural places with Gigi pulling Dani into her by her waist and Dani holding Gigi’s face. Every once in a while they would take a break but always went back in for more, both craving the connection.
Dani was the one to pull away, “Thank you”, she said while still holding Gigi’s face and staring into her eyes. “Thank you for tonight and for the weeks before tonight. Just thank you.” As she was going back into the kiss it was Gigi’s turn to back away. She looked at Dani with a serious expression on her face. What came next took Dani by surprise: “Do you realise how amazing you were tonight?” When Dani didn’t respond Gigi continued: “I was in absolute awe of you. The way you remained calm and collected but also stood your ground… It was beautiful. And so brave. Fuck, you were so brave. Calling Sophie… that was the bravest thing you could do. I could tell that seeing them together, even though it was the best thing, was not easy and I commend you for doing what was needed. Fuck me, for doing what was right! Do you realize that it demands the right kind of person to act like that around people that hurt them? To put their needs above your own even after what they did to you? I am so in awe of you.” For a moment Dani was too dumbfounded to say anything. She was stunned by the words that came out of Gigi’s mouth and, somehow, even though she’d heard them, she wasn’t able to fully react to them. Gigi just kept staring into her eyes and, for some reason beyond her control, Dani was not able to break eye contact. Only through this continuous look was she able to take in the words. It was like through her eyes, Gigi was delivering her message over and over again until Dani took it all in. However, after a while, Gigi started getting worried that maybe she had said something wrong but … Dani smiled. It was a small smile at first but it grew bigger. She leaned in and kissed Gigi before saying: “I’m sure you would have done the same.” Gigi laughed: “I’m gonna stop you right there. The first time I saw Nat with Alice I nailed my wedding ring to the front door, called Nat a bitch and told her and Alice to go fuck themselves. All that while wearing sweats.”
Both women laughed. “Well, okay, I’m better than you, then.” Dani teased. Before Gigi could get offended Dani kissed her again but quickly had to pull away to yawn. She tried to suppress it by keeping her mouth closed but she failed. “Okay, let’s sleep.” Gigi started while laughing, “Goodnight my love.”
“Goodnight”
And they fell asleep in each other’s arms.