Work Text:
No matter what she did, she would never be happy. She would never be happy if she dated European men online, she would never be happy if they occasionally voice called with her to tell her she had original thoughts unlike most modern woman, and she would never be happy being Catholic or a tradwife. She's unsatisfied here, unsatisfied there, never satisfied and doomed to a life of constant dissapointment over the fact she was born with a disproportionate amount of dopamine and the inability to make friends.
She didn't want to be alive anymore, and she no longer believed in Heaven and Hell. Actually, she was a radical atheist before she started being groomed into the alt-right. In the back of her mind, she never really did believe in it. But, in any case, Hell was no longer a threat and she was being pushed to the threshold of complete and utter insanity. Every waking minute, every hour she is alive, is boredom. Complete. Unsolvable. Terrible. Boredom. And it'll never be fixed, not by Prozac or cognitive therapy or yoga or books on mindfulness or getting a stupid hobby or reconnecting with reality or self-love or whatever corporate bullshitting woketards are trying to sell now...
No, her death was the result of misfortune and she'd act accordingly. But the question was, how?
Knife to her wrists. Toaster in bath. Rope around her neck. Swallowing handfuls of Percocets... They all sounded painful, and hard to do. Getting her hands on any sort of gun wouldn't be easy, and she wasn't interested in being imprisoned before she had the chance to off herself. She wasn't even sure she wanted to kill herself. She just wanted to be absent of awareness for as long as possible. Oh, yeah. Maybe swallowing a bunch of pills would be the way to go. Peaceful and like falling asleep...yeah, she could go for it. And if she was going to die by her own hand, she'd do something fun. 'Cuz, why not?
She had had a lot of xannies, and a laptop, and the knowledge on how to make a livestream and this was everything she needed. She posted on her Twitter, which was mostly followed by her ex-e boyfriends/white supremacists, everything she was about to do and started the stream. Her hair was down and loose, all around her face as a slow stream of people began to join.
"I'm going to swallow a lot of pills and see if it does anything. Hope I end up on LiveLeak. Oh, wait. It got shut down, didn't it? Hope I end up on someone's meme channel on Discord. Everyone is at fault for this. I hope you all fucking die painful deaths."
She swallowed each and every last pill, downing it with vodka and dying a misanthrope an hour later. Forever remembered as an hero.