Underneath the Twilight

by MJ_Whitlock

Summary:

When Bella saves Edward from the volturi she didn't want him back like nothing ever happened. What if Bella had some backbone and did what she wanted. She has other options that she never realized were there when all the Cullen's come back. Her and Jasper start getting along after a joke that goes to far, and Jacob is staring to get more and more of a possibility in her mind. Who does she choose? Who should she choose?

Chapter 1: Life Changes in a Breath

Notes:

Chapter Song is Message In A Bottle by The Police

Bella pov:

The day started out like any other despite the fact that it was actually not freezing cold outside. Thank god for spring except for the allergies and the rain, the humid rain. Well I guess beggars can’t be choosers. I did all my normal morning routines, and got dressed in a forest green top, flannel, dark skinny jeans, and some doc martens. I knew it was going to get chilly once the sun set, so the boots and flannel are a must here in forks. I grabbed my school bag and homework off my desk and made my way down the stairs. Where Charlie was making breakfast?

“Hey dad! Are you trying to start a fire this morning.”, Trying to make light of the past couple days. See me and Edward have been fighting since I dragged him back from Italy. Mostly about what I can and can't do, and it’s been really pissing me off.

“Oh hey sweetheart, I was just trying to make you something nice. I know you’ve been stressed with that boyfriend of yours lately.”, Charlie is always trying his best to make up for lost time.

Honestly I almost cried at that moment. Charlie was doing his best to make me feel loved and supported. Even though we have a hard time talking to each other.

“Oh umm thanks dad I really appreciated it, but me and Edward aren’t quite back together yet. The eggs look pretty good and the toast isn’t even burnt this time. I’m proud of you.”, He always likes to act like he didn't almost burn the house down making spaghetti.

 

Charlie laughs, “Well Bells, you act like all I ever ate before you came here was fast food and the diner.”

Bella scratches her head, ”Oh my bad, I just assumed.”

“Don’t worry baby, I'm not offended that you think I'm a helpless old man. Now eat up. The roads are kinda wet and I don’t want you hydroplaning in that heavy truck.”

“Speaking of which dad I think I need new tires soon mine are looking kinda bare.”

Charlie waves his hand, “I already got you some new hybrid road wheels coming in soon. They will take some time to come in because the trucks got a different diameter than most. Let me know if they start giving you problems, and I can always drop you off. Also, I could have Jacob come and get ya.”

“Awesome thanks dad you didn’t have to do that. I could have paid for it. I am working now. I didn’t want to put you out.”

Charlie checks his watch, “ Shit, I’m running late I'll see you later sweetheart. I’m working a double tonight so don’t wait up.” He wasn’t running late. He just didn’t want to talk about money with me. We both know that he doesn’t make as much as he should, but he can’t really ask for more in a small town like forks. He is right though. I should probably leave soon just in case.

As soon as I walked out the door I felt bliss and soon after fell on my ass. “Fuck!” Dad was right when he said it had rained last night.

“God damn it. Now my jeans are wet and I don't have time to change.” Ugggggggg this sucks whatever.

I tie my flannel around my waist to cover the muddy parts and jump in the truck. “Okay all we have to do is make it in one piece baby.”, I put the keys in to start the car and turn…. Okay and turn…. And turn…. Nothing, okay time to call someone.

I pick up my phone and start scrolling through the contacts. So we have Edward but we aren’t on good terms right now. Jessica I don’t want her to ask why I didn’t call Edward. Jacob but he’s on partrole till noon. Alice but if I was supposed to call her she would have called me first right?

Rose and Emmet are a no go because Rose hates me, and I'm not getting Emmet in trouble. Carlisle is working. Esme doesn’t do cars. Man if only Rose liked me this would be so easy. So that leaves Jasper, but I don’t really know Jasper like I do the rest. Mostly because he’s a loose cannon apparently. What's one mistake at a birthday party? He’s proven that he is trustworthy. Especially after everything with James.

This could be a mistake, but anyone is better than Edward. So here goes nothing. I tap the contact and let it ring. “Ringgggg….Ringingggg…..speaker noises…. Hello?” Oh shit! He actually answered.

“Uhhh hey, yeah I kinda need some help, and wait is Edward there?” I really hope he isn’t because that would be weird shittttt.

“No, what's the problem darlin’. Did he do something?” Oh no, I was hoping he wouldn’t ask. I could deflect. Yeah, good plan brain.

“Uh yeah, I’ll tell you later. Right now my Truck isn’t starting, and I think the battery is dead or something. I really don’t want to see, or talk to Edward right now…. Could you help me out? Pleeeaseee! I’ll owe you one!” I really hope he will help me. I need to get to school on time, or Charlie will be upset with me.

I could hear him thinking on the other side of the line, “Why didn’t you call Alice?”

“Well if I was supposed to call her she would have called me right.” At the time that made more sense. Now I'm not so sure.

I heard a deep breath, “Okay, I guess you're not wrong. I’ll be there in 20. Make sure you’re wearing a jacket. You're gonna need it.”

Still unsure but not willing to puss out now, that I have a ride to school. That’s not dads cruiser of course, “Sounds good! I’ll go throw one on real quick. Tha.. click.” Did he just hang up on me?

Alright then once again beggars can’t be choosers. I gather all my stuff I just threw in the truck. I stuffed all my homework in my bag that fell on the floorboard. I run inside and decide that I probably have time to put on some not gross jeans.

As soon as I am getting my boots back on I hear a loud engine. I start running down the stairs and as soon as I'm gonna leave I remember I need a jacket apparently. I turn and see Charlie's brown leather jacket hanging on the hook and snatch it up.

As soon as I walk out the door I see why. Jasper in all his glory is on a motorcycle. Fuck Charlie’s going to kill me if he finds out. The key word is if.

Jaser shuts off the motorcycle, “You coming or not darling. We are runnin’ late.” Dang I never realized how nice that accent was.

Anyway, no time to think about that, “Coming! Sorry I had to change my jeans. I fell.”

Jasper laughed like actually laughed. I’ve never seen him ever smile or laugh. He’s always just quiet and hiding behind Alice. It's kinda nice. A breath of fresh air one could say.

 

“No problem doll.” He grabs something out of the seat. “Now I'm sorry to do this, but you do have to wear a helmet. Here.” He just turns and puts it on for me. I’ve never been this close to him. It has never been this hot in forks. After he’s got me ‘protected’ he throws his leg over the bike and stands it up.

“Just jump on behind me Doll and hold on tight.” Oh fuck I really didn’t think this through like I thought I did. Okay Bella you got this. You’re just getting on your ex-boyfriends really hot brother's bike, and having to hold him the whole way to school. It’s totally fine.

“Yeah I can do that.” Do I always sound that breathless? I walk up to the bike and throw my leg over, and proceed to almost fall. Thankfully Japer caught me with his arm. After almost dying I settled in and put my arms around his waist. Uh oh he’s ripped. I can feel everything through this stupid thin shirt he’s wearing. Almost like he wore it on purpose to mess with me.

“You ready?”

“Of Course, I’m always ready.” Where did that come from? What a liar. I fall when I’m ready to walk out the door. Let alone ride a motorcycle.

“Of Course darlin’, I should have never insinuated anything different.” I could feel the massive smirk on his face. “ Well hold on tight because we are runnin’ mighty late.” and we shot off.

Remind me to never provoke Jasper again. We almost died like a hundred times on the way here. Honestly and I hate to say this, that was the most fun I’d had in a while. I just couldn’t stop laughing from the adrenal.

I step off the bike and take off the helmet, shaking my hair. “ That was awesome Jasper!! We have got to do that again! Pleaseeeeeee!!!”

Jasper put the kickstand down and got off the bike. “Of course, doll. I’m always down to have a pretty lady on my bike.”

…Blushing was an understatement. I was bright fire engine red. Which was only made worse because Edward had just pulled up in his volvo beside us.

“He’s mad isn’t he?”

Jasper flinched, “That’s an understatement darlin’.” He put his hand in between my shoulder blades, and sent me a wave of calm.

“Thank you Jasper, but I’m fine. This is nothing I can’t handle.”

Instead of taking his hand away though he put his arm fully around my shoulders.

“What are you…”

“SHhhhhh… do you wanna make him jealous? It'll be fun.” That I wasn’t so sure of, but by the look on Jasper's face. It would probably be pretty funny, or blow up in my face. Either way, who doesn’t love a good shit show? Just as I was about to respond everyone starts to get out of the truck starting with Rose and Emmet. Aren’t they supposed to be in Panama by now?

Emmet being my favorite new big brother said, “Long time no see what it’s been like three whole days. I’m going though Bella withdraws. Who else can actually give me a challenge when I want to play Halo. Come on Jasper’s no good.”

I felt Jasper bristle at the jab, and lean into me a little more, “Well you just lucked out Em, Bella here loves me more. She called me this morning because she wanted a ride on my new bike. Isn’t that right Darlin?” New bike no wonder it was so shiny. Just as he said that Alice and Edward decided to get out and stand with the rest of us. Edward was just looking at me confused. Alice just looked excited as usual. Maybe she liked shit shows.

“No way my sweet Halo playing Bella would ever want a ride on your new toy.” Emmet always going the humor route trying to make light of the situation.

Deciding to play along, “Yeah, Jas here was telling me about it the other day, and since I was having some car problems. I thought today was as good a time as ever.”

Jasper rubbed my arm and pulled in me a little more, and man do I wish we would do this more often. “ You were just telling me how we should do it more often. I could start picking you up for school till you get that truck of yours fixed.”

Okay now is the time to panic a little. What do you even say to that? Go with it. Yeah that was the plan as long as I don’t change how I’m acting now we can write it off later or something. I felt Jasper rub my arm and send some good vibes my way. I looked and saw Edward waiting for my response like this wasn’t just us messing with him like what I was about to say actually meant something.

I took a deep breath and casually mentioned, “ Yeah sounds good to me Jas. I had already assumed we were going to be doing that considering you're my favorite.” I did laugh a little at the end even though I was trying not to.

Emmet thought it was hilarious and busted out laughing, “ Man and here I thought you liked Edward. I should have known Jasper, and his southern charm would get the upper hand.” Oh man am I going to get an ear full from Edward later. Totally worth it. I looked up after laughing to find that he had already left.

Alice turned to me, “ Come on, that went a little far guys.”

I turned and glared at her, “ Nothing is too far after what he did to me Alice, don’t even start. He left me to rot here. So as far as I’m concerned I can have some fun.”

She sighed, “I guess you’re not wrong. On another note, when did you guys start getting along?” All of the sudden she looked very excited. I turned and looked at Jasper expecting him to have an answer, and all I found was a blank face. Then he lightly gripped my arm then let go.

Then he said, “ It doesn’t matter when only that we have, right Alice.” Well that was weird anyway.

“Let's get to class guys, it’s starting in like 10 minutes.”, I said.

Emmet looks at me and says, “Sorry that me and Rose won’t be around as much since we are technically graduated. I just wanted to say bye before we left. We won’t be gone too long though.” He then scooped me up in a big bear hug and then they were off.

We and by that I mean Jasper because Alice ran off. We started walking up to the school to go to our first class together. Jasper and I have 1st period and 7th together. English and history, so fun. I could tell today was definitely going to be interesting.

Chapter 2: Beginning to Stand

Notes:

Chapter Song is Dragula by Rob Zombie

Bella pov:

We were reading another classic I had already memorized. I couldn’t even imagine how Jasper felt. I wonder how many times he’s had to write a paper on The Wuthering Heights? At least three would be my guess.

Jasper raises an eyebrow at me and whispers, “Is there something funny about my face doll?” Huh? Oh I guess I was staring.

“Um…No, I was just thinking.” Smooth Bella smooth.

Jasper looked unimpressed, “Thinking? About, what exactly?” Okay Bella, it’s not like it was anything bad. So why do I wanna lie? Why do I want to mess with him? What's the worst that could happen?

“Well, If you must know I was thinking about how nice it was to have my arms wrapped around your waist. Among other things that are none of your business.” God I’m really trying to make this man hate me.

He chuckles, “Interesting and here I thought you were still mad because of what happened on your birthday. Turns out you get off on being in danger. Right, darlin’?” He had moved in real close to say that. So no one would hear. His breath on my ear sent shivers down my spine.

I swallowed, “ Well BRiNGGGG…… BRrrrriNgggg!!!” The bell rang and ended our first class of the day. Also ending me and Jasper's conversation.

He smirked, “ See you at lunch doll. Try not to die before then, alright.” And then he was gone.

What a bastard. I didn’t even get to come up with a clever comeback. Not that I could have anyway, but still. The next few class periods went by relatively quickly, and now while walking to the lunch room all I could think about was who was I going to sit by at the table. Edward was definitely a no. So I guess Alice or Jasper. I don’t want to push my luck with him so probably Alice, but she would tell me to sit by her if she thought I should. Uggggg, I don’t know anymore. Whatever, it's fine.

I was about to grab some lunch when I looked over and realized there was an extra tray conveniently placed right next to Jasper. He noticed me looking over, and patted the seat next to him. How was he being so casual about this? Oh, I see he was really playing up this game for Edward. He even got me lunch to make it seem like it was planned. Like we had been talking more, and I had asked him to grab me lunch. Smart boy.

Deep breath in deep breath out. Okay, time to face the music. I put my shoulders back and stood tall. I wanted to seem like I was confident, and fully aware about what was going on. I was a part of this game. I wasn’t going to be the one getting played for once. Buckle up Edward you have a storm coming.

I threw my bag into the empty seat beside me, and sat down beside Jasper. I could feel the anticipation coming off of him in waves. So instead of saying anything I grabbed his hand, and held it like it was completely normal. The table was silent. So I started eating the cold lunchroom pizza. I really didn’t want to be the first person to talk.

Edward looked like he was about to say something when Alice cut him off, “Isn’t so nice that they are getting along now Edward. You always complained that Jasper and Rose never really tried to get to know our Bella.”

He looked unsure, “Yeah, it’s great Alice. I doubt Rose will ever come around.” He did not sound as though he thought it was great. More like he was trying not to show his ass in the cafeteria.

Alice got a glazed look to her eyes then laughed, “Oh you’ll be surprised. Her and Rose eventually come to an understanding.”

He raised an eyebrow in disbelief. Was it really so hard to imagine me and Rose getting along. Okay, so maybe it was. She absolutely wanted nothing to do with me, but she did come with Em to say goodbye. So maybe there's a chance after they get back for us to find some common ground. I really hope so.

I guess I should say something, “Hey Jas, next time we have pizza will you grab me some ranch too. It’s tasting extra dry today.” Is that really all I could think to say? I mean the pizza was dry, but I could have been more creative.

He laughed, “Sure darlin’, but you’ll have to forgive me for my lack of forethought. It has been a while.”

Oh yeah, he doesn’t eat food. Well technically he does, it's just not cooked or dead. Anyway, Edward is not happy I can see it on his face no matter how much he tries to hide it. He had never really offered to get me food. Let alone tell him my preferences. Except that one time when I was dress shopping with Jessica and Angela. I wonder what he’s thinking. It would be nice to have his gift at this moment.

I need to reply, “My bad, If I had known we were having pizza I would have mentioned it. When I asked you to grab me something.” The look on his face was one pure victory. What have I walked myself into? Even Alice looked confused. I guess I picked the lesser option. Instead of replying right away Jasper let go of my hand, brought it around to sit across my shoulder now that I was done eating.

Oh fuck, “Thanks though, I am greatful I didn’t have to walk though the line. It always stresses me out.”

He rubbed my bicep up and down and said, “No Problem darlin’. I aim to please.” He ended the sentence with a kiss on the top of my head.

I am in for it now. I felt the blush go all the way down my neck. Edward was ready to kill. I’m guessing the only reason he didn’t leave was because he was scared he would do something rash if he moved. Alice was worried, looking back and forth between me and Edward. Waiting for something to happen.

Then jessica popped up out of know where, “So you’re fucking him too. Leave some for the rest of us Bella jesus christ.” … You’re kidding me… before I even knew what I was doing I felt the crunch of her nose underneath my fist.

Shit! I’m so fucked when dad finds out.

Well it's too late now.

She’s already screaming with blood running down her face and the only thing I could think to say was, “Now you can get that nose job you’ve wanted so bad, and you can blame it on me. Maybe even if you’re lucky the insurance will cover it.” When did I turn into such a bitch.

“When did you turn into such a bitch, Bella? Was it before or after you got all the Cullens to gang bang you.”

I looked over to the side to see that both Alice and Edward were gone. Probably all the blood. It was apparently just long enough for Jessica to swing at me. Thankfully I moved at the last second and she just barely missed me. I wonder if that looked as cool as it felt. She huffed in annoyance.

Before she could try and hit me again I picked up the plastic tray on the table and swung. In seconds she was on the ground, and I was holding half a lunch tray. I had hit her across the shoulder. I dropped the tray in surprise. Did I really just do that? I need to get out of here. Moments later I feel cold hands pulling me away through the crowd.

I look over and see Jasper. Thank god, I really don’t think I could deal with Edwards' condescending tone right now. It’s funny when you think about it, the ‘Cullen’ with the least amount of control around blood is the only one that could stay. I didn’t know where he was leading me.

Till I looked up and saw the principal wave us over, and Jasper started leading me in that direction. I’m sure I could have told him that I wanted to go home, and he would have made it happen. I would have but I know it would have only made the situation worse. Looking over I saw the nurse cleaning Jessica up at one of the lunch tables. While teachers were shooing everyone else back to class.

She looked pretty bad. Did I take it too far? Yes, the answer is yes. Do I feel bad about it? No, she has been rude to me since I got with Edward. She had always been jealous if not because of Edward. Then, because unfortunately Mike also had a thing for me. I am so sick of people pushing me around. I am done with it starting now. No more will Bella Swan be everyone else's punching bag.

Just as I made that decision in my head we made it to the principal's office. We stood there for a second. I looked over at Jasper confused. He took a deep breath and said, “I honestly don’t know what the hell that was, but Bella, if you were trying to get me interested in you, it’s working.”

Is he…making a joke?

I gave a little chuckle, “You’re kidding right… man if only it were that easy.” He honestly looks pretty serious, but maybe that's just his face.

He smirks, “That’s up to you to find out, pretty lady. Now it’s time to face the music. I’ll come with you if you want me to, for support.”

Deep breath in deep breath out, “Please, I can’t do this on my own…. Okay, let's do this before I lose my nerve and puss out.”

Jasper opens the door for me, and we walk in together. Mr.Greene does not look impressed. Great, he's probably pissed. That’s fair I did beat Jessica up pretty bad.

“Take a seat Ms. Swan.” He moves his hand toward the chairs in front of his desk.

I quickly take my seat on the right, and Jasper instead of sitting just stands behind my chair.

Mr. Greene glares at him, “And can I ask why you are here Mr. Hale?”

He smiles which doesn’t really make him look any less intimidating. Jasper out of all the Cullens is the most unnerving, maybe it’s the scars on his otherwise perfect skin. Maybe it’s the way his smiles never look real, always more like a grimace. It could be a number of things, but none of them matter when his words can make a whole army of people be under his control. His gift is both terrifying and useful. Depending on whose side he’s on.

Then he spoke really toning up his southern accent, “Well Mr. Greene my girlfriend here really needed the moral support. I sure wouldn’t want her having a breakdown over something as trivial as a little tussle in the cafeteria.”

Mr. Greene sighed, “Fine, as long as you behave you may stay. On the other hand Ms. Swan I am very disappointed in you. I have already called your father, and he is on his way. With another officer to get both yours and Jessica's statement. Plus some from your classmates who saw the predicament.”

He took a deep breath and continued, “Now, tell me what happened. I want your side of what happened before I make any assumptions.”

Oh okay, Bella you totally remember what happened, “Well me and Jasper were talking when Jessica showed up out of nowhere. She said some really nasty stuff about me, and all of a sudden we were fighting.”

Mr. Greene did not look impressed, “And what did Ms. Stanley say?”

“She something about me fucking him too refering to Jasper. And that I should leave some for the rest of them. I don’t know it was stupid. I was just so sick of her always acting like I was a whore because guys like me, and I got with the one person she couldn’t have.”

He looked confused, “Care to explain that to me Bella. I don’t really keep up with the latest gossip.”

I swallowed, “Well, she always liked Mike and Mike liked me and I didn’t like Mike. So then she got with Mike, and was always mad because she wasn't the first pick. And then I started dating Edward last year and she was livid because he was the one guy she thought was out of everyone’s league. Then he left and she was all smug saying he never loved me and stuff like that. Then when they came back, me and Edward were still friends. I guess she couldn't handle it. I don’t know. Oh and I guess she saw that I was with Jasper, and decided to use that against me too.”

God she really wasn’t a good friend, and wait did Jasper say I was his girlfriend earlier. Ugggg dad is going to be more pissed than he already was going to be. Jasper leaded down a little, and put his hand on my shoulder. He sent some calm though the connection.

Mr. Greene rubbed the bridge of his nose and sighed, “Why didn’t you come to someone in the staff earlier about this?”

I rubbed my arm anxiously, “Well, I didn’t really think anyone would care. It’s not like she was physically hurting me so I guess I just let it go.”

“Okay well Ms. Swan at this time I’m thinking your punishment won’t be too severe considering. Ms. Hammond did text me saying Ms. Standley's nose wasn’t broken, and that her arm was just bruised. Probably just a couple days suspension. Now that could always change. I am going to talk to Ms. Stanley, and then her and your parents and come to a decision.”

There was a knock on the door and Ms. Hammond stuck her head in and said, “I’ve brought Jessica. She’s calm enough to talk now. She already gave her statement to the police officer. Speaking of which Ms. Swan, your fathers here.”

Mr. Greene nodded, “Alright Ms. Swan you’re dismissed. Ms. Hammond, will you please send Ms. Stanley in.”

Me and Jasper get up and just before we open the door to leave Mr. Greene says, “I know you’re a good kid Bella. Please, don’t get involved with the wrong crowd.” When he said that his eyes shifted to Jasper.

My eyes narrowed, “Don’t worry, I’m a smart girl.” Then we left.

Chapter 3: Coming to Terms

Notes:

Chapter Song Fake It by Seether

Bella’s pov:

As we were leaving the office I saw Jessica coming. God she looked worse that I thought she would. Her nose was bruised all the way across, and it made her have black eyes. Her shirt was also rolled up where I hit her with the tray, and damn, I didn’t think I could do that kind of damage. It was purple and green all the way from her shoulder to her elbow. I bet it went up a little onto her upper back too.

As we passed she gave this smug ass smirk. All I could do was smile a big smile. I wanted her to know I didn’t regret a damn thing. The last thing I saw before she walked into the office was her face dropping and her hand going around to hold her arm. I guess she was trying to be brave in front of me.

As soon as me and Jasper walked out into the foyer Charlie got up, “What are you smiling about young lady? You’re in big trouble. I don’t know what that principle is going to give you as punishment, but I’m going to triple it.”

“Are you even going to hear my side of the story, first dad?” Did he not even care that she harassed me first?

He got a calmer look on his face and sighed, “Bella, although it does matter, and I will always be on your side in the end. You did beat the hell out of that poor girl.”

He took a deep breath and rubbed the bridge of his nose, “Hey, Brent get over her lets get her statement. Before I go completely gray.”

Brent laughs, “All right chief. I didn’t know your daughter was such a troublemaker.”

“Yeah well neither did I.” He’s really disappointed in me. God, today has been a shit show since I walked out the door this morning. I should have known better than to think today would be a good day.

Brent got his notepad and looked at me, “Alright, whenever you’re ready, little lady.”

I spilled everything that I did moments ago in the office.

“Alright, is that everything Bella?”

“Yep, that should be everything. All I can remember anyway. After I had taken fall last year my memory has been a little blurry at times.” Maybe, I can gain some sympathy points. I mean it wasn’t a complete lie anyway. My memory has been a little weird since Phoenix. Better actually, maybe it has to do with the bite. Both Charlie and Brent flinched when I mentioned what happened in Phoenix.

“Alright chief, I'm going to go get statements from the rest of the students. You deal with your little troublemaker.”

Charlie smiled, “Good luck, with the other kids Brent. They love to exaggerate.”

Brent laughed as he left. Now all that was left was me, Charlie, and Jasper. Everything should be fine as long as I stay calm. I’ve been feeling a panic attack under the surface since Jessica showed up. Maybe Jasper was helping me keep it under control. I guess we’ll never know. Was the room getting smaller or am I just going crazy. Just as soon as I had that thought. I felt Jaspers’ arm wrap around my waist and a wave of calm come over me. Oh, so he was definitely helping.

Charlie sighed, “So Bella other than the fact that you’ve been hiding the bullying Jessica has been doing. Is there anything else you want to tell me?” He looked over at Jasper very non discreetly.

Well here goes nothing, “Well dad this is Jasper. He’s my… Boyfriend?” Jeez, Could I sound any more unsure of myself? Charlie did not look amused. Jasper on the other hand looked like a cat who got the cream. Oh no, what have I walked myself into?

Jasper smiled and layed on the southern charm real thick, “Nice to meet you Mr. Swan. I’m sorry we had to meet at such an unfortunate time. Bella here has been trying to get me to come down, and see ya for a while now. But with Edward being a right asshole. We decided to put off mentioning it. Till we knew if we were going to be taking the relationship seriously, or if we needed to just stay friends. See I also just got out of a long term relationship. We were hoping to find out if we just needed someone, or if we actually wanted to be together.”

Charlie looked like he was considering it. Then, gave a huff, “Well I guess that makes sense boy. Now tell me what are your intentions with my daughter? As you stand here today.”

Jaspers’ arms around my waist tighten a little. Then I felt him write the word sorry into the skin of my hip. Sorry for what? What was he about to do? What was he sorry for? Getting us in this situation in the first place over a little prank on Edward, for lying, for telling the truth. How could I know? I really wish things made more sense.

I thought I loved Edward, but with Jaspers’ arm around my waist. All thoughts of Edward left my mind. As if he never mattered in the first place. Did he? If all it takes is a little attention from someone else. Do I just like Jasper? I mean he is handsome. But what of Alice? I heard Jasper mention they had ended their relationship. I had just assumed she was in on the joke, but what if she wasn’t. What if they aren’t even together anymore, and Jasper just wanted something fun to get his mind off the breakup.

Would that really be so bad? I am using him to feel better about me and Edward fighting all the time. Being with him is the most fun I’ve had in a while. Even though we aren’t together, I’m going to enjoy this. I’m going to take everything Jasper gives me in stride. I want to feel what it feels like to actually live. I want to be on the edge. To jump and feel the wind on my face, and the splash of the water when I hit. To feel the fear of the possibility of drowning in the depths. That's what I want and that’s what I’ll get. No more baby Bella Swan. I’m going to make life what I want it to be, and enjoy every second of it. The good and the bad.

Then I hear Jasper's raspy voice break though my internal monologue, “Well Mr. Swan if I’m being completely honest. Bella here has made me happier than I have been in a very long time. I will do whatever it is that she wants. Whatever it takes to make her happy, and as long as she’ll have me I’ll be there.”

Jeez, is he trying to make me fall for him on purpose? If it wasn’t for the fact that his arm was still around I’d probably be a little puddle at this point.

Charlie looked intrigued, “Well I’m still not sure about you boy, but as long as Bella trusts you. I’ll trust her judgment. Now if you hurt one hair on my little girl's head. I’ll find you. Mark my words.”

Jasper looked amused, “Of course sir. I wouldn’t want it any other way.”

Then the doors to the foyer opened, and who I could only guess to be Jessica's’ mom walked in. She seemed really exhausted. Like she was going to kill over at any moment. She looked over at us and sighed, “I honestly don’t know why that girl thought she could pick a fight with the chief of police's daughter and win. It’s beyond me.”

Charlie laughs, “You must be Jessica's mother.”

“Yep, that’s me. Now I’m sorry for all of this Jessica's’ mouth always gets her in trouble. I knew this was going to happen one day. Maybe it’ll teach her a lesson.”

I was definitely not expecting her to be on my side at all. Huh, the doors to the office open and then a crying Jessica comes out.

Her mom does not seem like she wants anything to do with this, but she straightens up and says, “Oh baby are you okay?” The rest is just Jessica blabbering into her mom's chest. Damn, when did she become such a baby?
Soon after Mr. Green comes out, “Alright I've heard what I needed. Mrs. Stanley and Chief Swan please join me so we can determine their punishment.”

Charlie eyes me, “Can Bella go ahead and drive home? She’s quite tired.”

Mr. Greene looks at me then to Jasper, “Yes, you’re both dismissed. You as well Jessica. Go home and get some rest. Your parents and I will determine your punishments then they will relay them to you.”

Mr. Greene motioned for my dad and Jessica's mom to enter, “Now let's get down to business.”

After that door closed everything seemed to shift.

Jessica glanced over at me and sneered, “It seems I was right you are screwing him. What a shame that you had to settle for the least desirable out of all the Cullen's. You’d be better off getting with Tyler.”

I could feel Jaspers feeling through the hand on my waist. I’m not sure if he knew of that fact or not, but I wasn’t going to tell him just in case he moved it. So… insecurity. That’s not something I thought vampires could feel. They are all so beautiful. Perfect to an extent. Jasper was the most unusual of the Cullen's. That’s for sure.

He had scars. Somehow the perfect skin of a vampire wasn’t so perfect. I wonder how that worked. Maybe his scars are like mine from Phoenix. Made by other vampires. I did hear he was in some kind of vampire war. I’ll have to ask him.

I wonder why Jessica hates him so much. Maybe it's the same reason Mr. Greene didn’t like him. I had to admit it Jasper was kinda off putting. I’ve never been afraid of him, but I could see how one could be. He definitely has and air of don’t fuck with me, or I’ll kill you and enjoy it. You know? Anyway I had a bitch to respond to. Jasper looked at me expectedly.

Here goes nothing, “Well you know Jessica not everyone likes boring ass guys. Who don’t even know how to fuck, but thanks for the concern. I’m sure you’ll be very happy in a relationship where he can't ever get you off.”

Jessica looked confused, “What are you talking about Bella? Mike does just fine.”

She seemed very unsure of herself, “Really? I guess I misjudged him then, but maybe you just like the attention he gives. So you just let the fact that he’s a dud in the sac go. I could never. It’s not very fun if you ask me.” No one was asking Bella!!! Not like I’ve ever had sex before either. Why am I like this? The worst part is based on her face. I'm not wrong. Poor mike.

She stammered, “Well well… How is that any of your business?”

What? She started this, “It’s not. So maybe you should have kept your nose out of my business in the first place. Try it again and I won’t just bruise it next time.”

Then, I shoulder checked her on the way out. On her bad side of course. Jasper pulled me in real tight while laughing on the way out. There were a couple of people standing around the office. I guess that they wanted to see if I was going to be left in handcuffs or something. They all looked pretty shocked when we came laughing. We were leaning into each other. I sighed, this was nice. I could get used to having Jasper around. Just as I thought that he pulled me to face him. Then he slowly inched his face closer to mine.
In a deep quiet voice he whispered, “Do you trust me?’

And without thinking I said, “With my life.”

He smirked then pulled me in so that if you looked at us from a certain angle it would seem like we were kissing. Fuck, his lips were so close to mine. I could feel my heart racing. Before I could even try to move forward and complete the kiss Edward came over and pulled Jasper off of me.

I couldn’t stop myself. I yelled, “What the fuck are you doing!?”

Edward has the ability to at least look a little ashamed, “What am I doing? What are you doing? Bella, he could hurt you. He has no control.”

Oh… I didn’t even think about that. Jasper did have a harder time around blood then the rest of them. Although if that were the truth then why did they run away when me and Jessica fought and Jasper stayed.

I’m so tired of this, “I’m done Edward.” Huh… I actually said it. Edward got a really angry look on his face, and I looked over and saw Jasper standing there like a smug little bastard. Oh no, what is he thinking about?

Edward spoke, “I see how it is Bella. He could give you things I couldn’t. Honestly I’m impressed you could control yourself Jasper, considering what you are.” Does he think of me and Jasper… fucked like for real fucked. Like not just some joke to make Jessica feel bad. Edward saw something in Jaspers mind that has him convinced that we’ve fucked. Dear god, if you are out there please make Edward not freak out in the middle of the school.

I opened my mouth to speak, but before I could Jasper butted in. This should be good, “It’s really not that hard when you’ve had practice.”

Uh oh… “So anyway guys, let's take this somewhere else okay. The middle of the school is definitely on the place.”

Soon after I said that Alice came running at a fast human pace around the corner. She started to pull Edward away from us, but before he left he said, “I won’t let him win Bella. You’re mine.”

And he turned his back to leave, “I belong to no one but myself, Edward.”

He just kept walking as if he didn’t hear me. Jasper pulled me to him and we walked out the other door and went toward his bike. Well I was right, today was definitely interesting.

Chapter 4: Become the Night

Notes:

Warning there is some smut in this chapter.

Song for this chapter is Because the night by Patti Smith

Bella Pov:

Jasper was holding my hand as we left. I looked over to where we were going. Edward and Alice were already standing by his Volvo. Why couldn’t they just leave already. Jasper and I slowed down to a walking pace. Hoping that by the time we made it over there they would be gone. Alice was clearly arguing with Edward even though I couldn’t hear them.

Jasper flinched and I felt something I couldn’t quite define though our connection. Sad maybe, but it felt more like when someone you love is disappointed in you. Like you messed up and they all the sudden don’t want anything to do with you.

Suddenly Jasper spoke in a low voice, so they wouldn’t hear over their shouting, “We don’t have to do this anymore if you don’t want to. I… I didn’t mean for it to go so far. Edward he’s… well, upset would be an understatement.”

To say that statement pissed me off would be an understatement, “Well, it’s too damn late for you to take it back now Jasper. You’re stuck with me and my bullshit till I say so. We got into this mess together, and if we get out of it. It will be together. Got it cowboy?”

Stunned yeah, that’s the word I would use to describe Jasper right now. We had come to a complete stop in the middle of the school parking lot. He let go of my hand to run it through his hair. God why did he have to look like that. It made it so hard to argue. No Bella, snap out of it. Stand your ground you promised you wouldn’t let pretty boys tell you what to do anymore.

He sighed, sounding tired, “I don’t know if you would feel the same if you knew how Edward felt.”

Oh so that’s how it is. If only he hadn’t let go of my hand maybe I would be able to tell how he was feeling, “What does Edward have anything to do with my decisions? Last time I checked him and I are over.” After the way Edward has treated me it’s in my best interest to just stay away from him. At best I could be his friend, but only if he could respect my boundaries.

Jasper looked unsure, but winked and spoke, “I didn’t mean it like that and you know it Bella. I was just considering him as something that could possibly hold you back in our relationship.”

Our relationship? Oh, I glanced to the right, and saw Edward in his Volvo with the windows down. With Alice pouting in the passenger seat. I see, he’s testing me. He wants to see if I'm serious about this, or if Jasper and I are messing with him. Maybe, It’s what I say when I don’t think he’s around that interests him. I’m not sure, but last time I checked this was none of his business. So I'm going to make him regret being nosy.

I took a step towards Jasper, and placed my hands on his chest. Okay Bella, what would fuck with Edward the most? He really didn’t like when he caught me and Jasper ‘kissing’. I wonder if Jasper would even be okay with kissing me. Only one way to find out. If not I’ll make it up to him later. Right now I need to prove a point.

I looked up at Jasper, “After what we’ve been through together. I’m not going to let some past crush get in the way of us Jazz.”

I moved my hands up to the back of his neck, “Now kiss me like you mean it cowboy. Prove it to me that you’re not going to leave me.” There was an unsaid like Edward at the end of my sentence.

He slowly slid his hands to rest on my waist. Then he leaned forward till just our noses were touching, “Are you sure darlin? After this there’s no going back. You’re stuck with me, and I mean it. No more games. Just you and me”

Fuck that voice is going to put me in an early grave. I took a breath, “Please, make me yours Jasper.”

Jasper's eyes darkened considerably, and his breathing became uneven. “Lord Bella, you have no idea what you’re doing to me. I might just take you right here if you're not careful. Make you one of us, and steal you away forever.”

… Fuck… I’m so screwed. I opened my mouth to say something back, and before I could let out a sound. He leaned down and kissed me. Fuck, It should be a sin for how good his mouth feels on mine. It felt so unrestrained, wild even.

Nothing like how it felt when me, and Edward kissed. It always seemed like we couldn’t stop kissing fast enough for him. Like he was just doing it to appease me, but with Jasper it was like he was trying to show me that he didn’t think I was just a fragile human.

I leaned into the kiss, and as I did I felt a rumble in his chest. God that is hot. He soon pulled away, and when he did I took a big breath of air. He brought a hand to my face and rubbed his thumb across my cheek. I closed my eyes and leaned into it. Damn, I could definitely get used to that everyday.

I heard him let out a little chuckle, “You know. If you really want.” He leaned down and put his face on my neck. He slowly started trailing kisses down my neck, “I’ll change you whenever you’re ready. I know you were considering it for a while. Bella I..”

Before he could finish his sentence Edwards Volvo stopped right behind where Jasper was standing.

Edward spoke, “I see how it is Bella. You definitely moved on while I was gone. Only you got with someone even more dangerous than I. Jasper, we will be having a talk when you get home.”

Then he drove off. Well that was more pleasant than earlier at least. I’m guessing it had something to do with Alice being in the car with him. She probably told him doing anything other than just talking would end badly, or maybe he saw it in her head. No-one knew but him and Alice.

I turned and looked at Jasper, “Let's get out of here, please.”

He nodded and threw his arm over my shoulder and we walked over to his bike. He got the helmet back out of the seat for me to wear. Then, he straddled the bike and started it without saying a word. Oh no, I hope I haven't done something wrong. I put on the helmet and slowly stepped onto the bike behind him, and wrapped my arms around him. Soon after he felt me get settled he backed out of his spot, and we were on our way back to my house. I found myself thinking the whole way home.

Did Edward really care if I was with Jasper because he loved me, or because he felt like he owned me. It’s not like me and him ever really saw eye to eye. He always thought I was getting into things that were too dangerous for me to handle. I wonder if he saw me more as a pet than a lover. Not that it really matters now considering that he and I are over.

When we finally got home Jasper parked his bike and stepped off. I followed soon after. I took off the helmet and handed it to him. He placed it back in the seat. He leaned over the bike for longer than necessary. He ran an aggressive hand through his hair. Then, he turned around and looked at me. Like really looked at me. Honestly, it was starting to make me feel self conscious. He suddenly turned and walked toward the house. Okay, what was going on? I followed him over and unlocked the door. Opening it and following him in.

I locked the door back, put my keys on the hook, and then felt Jasper walk behind me, “Here let me help.”

He immediately helped me shrug off my jacket, or well more like Charlie's jacket. Afterwards he hung it on the hook for me. What a gentleman. He walked over, and placed a hand on my cheek.

Eventually, he looked down and sighed, “Bella, we really need to talk about what happened today. Before….. Before… I…”

He looked up at me, unable to finish his sentence, “Bella, please just tell me what you want from me.”

…Oh, what do you even say to that, “I… I don’t know anymore, Jasper. All I know is that I want to be happy, and the time I spent with you today was the best I’ve felt in awhile.”

I put my own hand over his, and the other on his chest. As I did so I felt a little rumble come from him. He moved his other hand around and placed it on my waist.
He seemed unsure of what to say, “I know we didn’t talk a lot before, but god do I regret not getting to know you sooner. There’s something about you that I just can’t place. Something that pulls me to you, and I promise it’s not because you smell like a tasty treat.”

I snickered at his little joke, “Okay, but what do you want from me Jasper. Was today all apart of our stupid prank on Edward or was it real?”

He went completely still, “Was that what you thought? That it was just something to get Edward riled up. Well I hate to tell you sweetheart, but that little game ended before you even knew it began. When you asked if Edward was there this morning I lied. He was in the kitchen talking to Carlisle on how to fix your relationship, and something about the way he was talking about you made me furious. So when I got your call I saw it as a great time to put Edward in his place. God you should have seen his face. He was so mad that you called me for help, and not him.”

He took a deep breath and continued, “But after I saw you there this morning. All swallowed up in your dad's jacket. You were trying so hard not to seem scared, but I could feel everything you felt. Don’t ever forget that you can’t hide your feelings from me Darlin. The one that confused me the most was when you felt lust looking at me. Now that was a surprise. So I decided to push my luck and see what you could take. You always manage to exceed my expectations. Nothing fazes you, and by lunch you had me wrapped around your finger. Nothing could compare to the way I felt when you got in that fight. Lord, you’re absolutely breathtaking when you’re angry.”

He took a step closer to me. I could feel his breath on my face.

“And now I can feel that you want me darlin.” He moved in just slightly closer, “But I can also feel all the different emotions that you feel around me. I’m definitely interested in you Isabella, but I’m not willing to pursue someone that isn’t sure. We can act for your dad and school. Maybe even when we are alone we will just get to know each other better. Then, when you’re ready let me know, and if you never are I’ll accept that.”

Finally I spoke, “Okay that sounds good to me, but how do I know you’ll wait for me?”

He moved to where his mouth was just ghosting over mine, “You won’t Isabella. So enjoy me while you can.”

Suddenly he kissed me. This wasn’t like the other one. This one was proving a point. It was hard and intense. The hand that was on my cheek slid to the base of my neck where he carded his hand through my hair. Using that as leverage he pressed me to him harder.

Soon after he pulled my head back by my hair. “Jesus, Jasper!”, I whispered. I felt his chest move with laughter. He ran his nose down the side of my face down to my neck. Which he started kissing hungrily. Not gonna lie, it worried me a little bit. Considering that, it just turned me on more. Maybe he was right earlier, maybe danger does get me off. He ran his tongue down the side of my neck till he got to the spot where it meets my shoulder. Immediately he started sucking on it.

“Oh fuck, Jasper!”, Shit was that me? The hand that was on my waist moved to my lower back. Where he used that as leverage to pull us closer together. I gasped as soon as I felt what he was packing between us. Jesus if I don’t get some kind of friction soon I might cease to live.

When he was happy with what I’m guessing is now a massive hickey. He pulled off my neck and started kissing me again. Slowly we began to back up to where the couch was. When the back of my knees hit it. Jasper pushed me down. Holy fuck I could cum just by the look on his face.

Although that voice could do so much more, “Oh Darlin aren’t you pretty all defenseless and flushed.”

He had a feral grin on his face. I could see his fangs sticking out slightly. He started to inch toward me. Slowly he got on top of me. Sliding his knee in between my legs. Giving me some much deserved friction. He ran his hand under the edge of my shirt. Feeling my skin and stopping at my waist.

He bent down and hovered right above my lips, “Tell me what you want me to do Isabelle. I want to hear you say it.”

On God I could have died right there, “Kiss me Jasper.”

I didn’t even stutter. Damn I’m getting better at this. Just when I was starting to feel more confident he leaned in and kissed me. Just as he was told to. He put one of his hands underneath my head so he could deepen the kiss. Deciding to be more proactive I nibble on his bottom lip. Bringing it ever so slightly into my mouth.

Jasper pulled back and started running kisses down my throat, “Fucking hell Bella. I don’t know how Edward ever was able to stop himself around you.” While groaning into my neck he moved to where he was completely in between my legs. Grabbing one and hoisting it around his hip. Then, grinding into me.

Just when I was about to say we should probably take a minute to readjust. I heard the door open and Charlie’s key jingle. “What the hell is going on in here!”

Good question dad. I had been so lost in it all. That I hadn’t even realized what I was actually doing. Well what we were doing. Even Jasper looked shocked. How did he not hear Charlie come home? Was he as lost in it as I was? Jasper slowly sat up. I slid back and sat up and pulled down my shirt. Thank god we didn’t get any farther.

Charlie looked at me expectantly, “Well Bella, what has gotten into you today? First, the fight, then, the boyfriend that I didn’t know about, and now I find you messing around on the couch.”

Well when you put it like that, “I…. I don’t…I’m sorry to disappoint you dad.”

“You’re damn right I’m disappointed. Now I know you’ve been having a hard time, but that doesn’t mean you get to act out. You’re not on drugs or anything are you?”

I’m not going to lie, I'm a little hurt, “No dad. Come on. I’m just trying to be a teenager for once. I’m tired of being an adult all the time. I’m sorry that this all happened at once, but I’m not going to regret it.”

Charlie ran his hand over his face, “You know Bella. I’m too tired for this right now. Get your boy out of here now. I need a beer.”

That was the end of it I guess. I heard the fridge open in the kitchen, “Okay Jasper lets get you out of here before he blows a gasket.”

Jasper looks at me a little startled, “Sorry yeah.”

He gets up and I walk him out. After I close the door. I’m caught in a kiss. He soon pulls away, “I’m sorry Bella I didn’t hear him pull up, or I promise I would have said something.”

I sigh, “I know Jasper. Although it is a little hard to believe. Like how distracted does a vampire have to be to get snuck up on?”

He hummed, “Very, you just felt so good I never wanted it to end. Let alone us never touching skin to skin.”

I could feel the heat in my cheeks, “Well when I’m finally ungrounded when I’m thirty we can do it again some time.”

He laughed and said, “I have a feeling it will be sooner than that.”

He sighed while running a finger down my cheek, “Well I bid you farewell my love. If I should be so lucky to see you in my dreams. Then God is surely smiling upon me.”

I giggled. When have I ever giggled, “You don’t sleep silly.”

He grinned, “Oh, but you forget about daydreaming.”

He smirked and threw his leg over his bike. Turning the key and sped off into the distance. Oh man, I got it bad.

Chapter 5: Well That Was Awkward

Notes:

Chapter Song is Love Me Like You Used To by Lord Huron

Jasper Pov:

What the hell were you doing Jasper? Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! God Edward is going to be such a bastard when I get home. With reason this time. I almost fucked Bella. Holy shit! I almost fucked Bella. She almost let me. I don’t know which is worse. Probably the fact that her dad walked in on us. I’ve never been so lost in lust that I wasn’t aware of my surroundings.

God, she felt so good underneath me. Okay, take a deep breath Jasper. Everything is going to be fine. She wanted it to. It’s not like you were taking advantage of her. You felt that she wanted it. Also you didn’t almost fuck her. Both of us were completely clothed. Well, if I had it my way we wouldn’t have been for much longer. Thank god I chose not to wear a helmet while I rode. It really helped me cool off after what Bella and I just did.

I wonder if this is why Alice ended things between us. After Edward made us all leave. Alice had sat me down, and said we would both find our true soulmates soon. So that we wouldn’t be in each other's way we ended things between us. It has been a lot more normal than I’d like to admit.

We’ve been through so much together that I thought I would miss our intimate relationship more. Honestly it’s like breathing now that her and I have decided to just be friends. Considering we aren’t really soulmates. Maybe this is how we were always meant to be.

Uggggg, why can’t I stop thinking about her lips on mine. I turned down the driveway. Okay Jasper get a hold of yourself. You can’t let Edward see anything. God, the thought of Edward seeing her like I just did makes me want to burn the world. I parked my bike in the garage. I took a moment to steady myself, and then headed inside.

When I walked in I noticed everyone, but Emmet and Rosalie home and at the dining table. Of course they would be there. Considering this does require a family meeting I guess. Although I don’t know why it’s any of their business who Bella or I are with.

Alice stood as I came in, “Jasper, have a seat we have a lot to discuss.”

I rolled my eyes, and she gave me a glare, “I really don’t think we do, but I’ll entertain the idea. That is unless you’re going to tell me what it is I can do. Then don’t bother.”

I saw Edward bristle at the slight, “We are going to talk Jasper. Make it civil for once, would you.”

What a bastard. Yeah I hope you heard that Edward. He gave me a glare. I smirked and sat at the chair that had no one next to it. Apparently Alice was not happy with my choice. Maybe I should have sat next to her. Maybe that had a better outcome, but I’m feeling very attacked already. I want to be able to leave whenever I feel the need.

Carlisle sighs while pinching the bridge of his nose, “Okay tell me why you thought it was okay to mess with someone else's soulmate, Jasper?”

Soulmate my ass? Bella wasn’t Edwards' mate. Right?

I raised an eyebrow, “Last time I checked she wasn’t his, and even if she were. Everything I did with her she wanted and asked for.”

Carlisle ran his hand down his face, “Even if that is true.” Edward looked like he wanted to interrupt, “Do you really think it appropriate?”

Before I could respond, Edward cut in, “I can’t believe you would go to such length to make everyone else as miserable as you are. Just because Alice doesn’t want you doesn’t mean you have to take it out on me. This is ridiculous Jasper. She is mine!”

I laughed hard. Some people may say this is when I finally lost it. Honestly this is the first time I’ve felt completely in control. Bella does that to you. She helps me feel strong, and able to take anything on. Her teenage rebellion is definitely starting to rub off on me.

I smirked, “It’s funny. You know the fact that you think see’s yours. It’s a joke that you think you can compete with me. I don’t have to own Bella for her to want me.”

Edward stood up and slammed his hands on the table almost hard enough to break it, “Liar! She would never want you. She’s my soulmate, and you can’t have her! You’re a liar! I bet you’ve never even really kissed her. This is just some game to you.”

I let some of what we were doing earlier slip. I reeled it in as quickly as possible, but it was too late. He had already seen it.

“Edward It's not…”

He interrupted me, “You could have killed her! How could you? She isn’t yours too..”

Carlisle stood, interrupting Edward, “Edward lower your voice. I know you’re upset, but it is not a reason to act a fool. Now sit down.”

Edward listened and sat back down looking ready to start shit again. Carlisle sighed and turned toward me, “Now Jasper I’m sure I speak for everyone here in asking what it was that Edward saw.”

I cringed, “Well I’m not sure It’s appropriate.”

Carlisle glared at me, “I’m sure whatever it is pertains to what we are talking about. Am I correct?”

I swallowed, “Yes.”

He smiled, “Then it needs to be said. I’m sorry to pry, but this is an extremely sensitive situation. Now tell us what it is exactly you were thinking about to set Edward off.”

Carlisle sat back down and gestured for me to explain.

What a bastard, “Well unlike what you may think Carlisle I don’t think things on purpose. Just to provoke Edward. Maybe he should keep his nosey self out of my head. He just said something that made me think of Bella. If I’m being completely honest I wish he wouldn’t have seen it at all.”

Edward growled, “Like I would want to see Bella like that with you of all people. I wasn't in your head on purpose.”

He crossed his arms like a child. I did feel a little bad. Edward was not doing well right now. The emotions coming off of him mostly consisted of self loathing and betrayal. Jesus, he is so dramatic. Carlisle gave me the sign to continue. I really didn’t want to talk about this with the whole family.

I groaned, “Fine, I’ll tell you. Before I came here today I had dropped Bella off at home. Well her and I have been getting mighty close lately, and one thing leads to another. The part that Edward saw was…” I cleared my throat and took a deep breath. Everyone was completely silent.

I knew they knew what I was getting at, but this was some sort of strange and unusual punishment. “When I had pushed her onto the sofa, and soon after I was between her legs. She then asked me to kiss her, and I’m sure you can figure out the rest.”

Edward looked absolutely ready to kill, but before he could yell at me again Carlisle spoke, “I had a feeling.” He sighed looking much older than he should considering his eternal youth. “Jasper I’m not going to stop you from seeing Bella, but from what I’ve heard you haven’t been a very good influence on her. I’ve been told Bella got into a fight today. Now that doesn’t sound very Bella like to me. I do know that you have a violent streak, and that maybe you have been influencing her.”

Damn and here I thought Carlisle didn’t have any favorites. I see how it is. Don’t worry I’ll make sure this is the moment you live to regret old man. Edward gave me a confused look.

I smirked, “You know you’re right Carlisle, maybe I’m no good for her, but that’s not my problem. Last time I checked as long as no one dies, no harm, no foul, right.” I stood, “Bella and I are not going to change to make anyone more comfortable. Now if she all the sudden is going through a rebellious stage, and doesn’t want me once she’s done, that’s fine. It’s her choice and unlike some people I will not take that away from her.”

Alice got up and spoke about the situation for the first time, “Jasper, I’m sorry if I hurt you, but I promise it’s for the best. There’s no need for all this hostility.”

Are you fucking kidding me, “You know Alice I honestly don’t give a fuck about any of this any more. Our relationship ending was mutual. Now stop holding it over my head like my only reason to live was for you. I’m so tired of everyone walking around on eggshells around me. I’m fine I’m just not having to change myself to make you happy anymore. I can finally just be myself.”

Alice looked on the verge of crying, “I know Jasper. I’m sorry that I restrained you for so long. I just… I just thought it was for the best. We were so happy I hate to think you had to change yourself for me. Maybe this is all for the best.”

I ran my hand through my hair, “Alice I was never unhappy with you. I just couldn’t be myself. You’ve always just been so sensitive. I hated getting you upset after one of my episodes. It’s not your fault that I need more in life than a white picket fence and a nice happy family.”

“I know Jazz. I had just hoped that we could possibly be each others end game, but then I saw you meeting your soulmate. Everything changed after that. I can’t see anything properly anymore. Both you and Bella don’t make the decisions that are the most likely. Sometimes I don’t even see anything because the both of you are just acting. Neither one of you is thinking about anything. It’s so frustrating.”

“Alice, don't beat yourself up both Bella and I are going through some stuff. It’s just easier not to make decisions sometimes. Have you seen anything else about my soulmate? Have I met her yet?”

Everyone looked shocked. Oh yeah I forgot we never told them. Edward looked even angrier if that's even possible.

Alice scrunched her eyebrows together, “No? I still can’t see who it is. The visions have changed though. Sometimes I can see you with someone, and sometimes their future completely disappears. I don't understand. I can’t see much of anything on Bella anymore. The few jumble things I do get are her with you Jazz or it’s completely black. Maybe she’s blocking me somehow.”

The only things that could block Alice’s visions are the wolves. Why would Bella have anything to do with them? Oh, Jacob, how could I forget.

“Hey Alice, I would bet money that she’s probably going to be spending a lot of time with Jacob soon. It’s the only person Charlie would trust to look after her while he’s at work. You know while she’s probably on suspension.”

She looked pensive, “That would make sense. What a relief. I was starting to think I was broken.”

I chuckled, “Alright are we done here guys. I’m tired, and I need to hunt.”

Esme gestured to Carlisle. He sighed, “This conversion isn’t over, but we can finish it another time. Go hunt Jasper.”

Edward was about to say something when Carlisle turned toward him and nodded up to his study. I see so he’s going to try and talk some kind of sense into him. Edward grumbled but followed Carlisle up the stairs. God, I’m tired of this. I started to walk toward the door when Alice grabbed my sleeve.

“Do you want company?”

Why did she have to look so sad, “Honestly Alice I need some time to think. I promise next time we’ll go together, alright.”

Her eyes looked distant. Then she smiled sadly, “Yeah next time.”

Oh no, I’ve upset her, but before I could say anything. She was gone. Ugggg now I feel like shit. Whatever I need to feed. It’s been far too long, and I’ve been much too close to a human's throat today. When I thought that I heard Edward yell something upstairs. Served him right. I grabbed my keys and jacket as I left. I think I'm going to go somewhere different than usual. So I hopped on my bike and went north.

Chapter 6: Red Underlined

Notes:

Chapter song is Look What You Made Me Do by Taylor Swift

Bella’s Pov:

Okay, so saying Charlie was mad was an understatement. I was suspended from school for five weekdays. Which means I’ll be going back next Tuesday. That’s a whole week. Charlie said I can’t see Jasper till then either. Then, after I’m back at school only under supervision for the next two weeks. Well that or until he trusts Jasper around me. So never.

He was more upset about me and Jasper than the fight. He was going to just let me off this once. That is till he walked in on Jasper and I humping on the couch. What is wrong with me? A hot guy gives me attention for a day, and I let him do that. Jeez Bella, what has gotten into you? Maybe dad was right. I probably need to slow down, and take a look at what I’m doing. I just really don’t want to.

Yesterday with Jasper was the most fun I’ve had in a very long time. Since Edward left. Maybe even before that. Being with Edward was easy, but only because he did everything for me. I never really had to make any decisions. Not that I wanted him to. It’s just that he did.

With Jasper I felt alive. He let me do whatever I wanted to, and just tagged on for the ride. He was having as much fun as I was with our little game. Not to mention everywhere he touched set me ablaze. I’ve never felt like that with anyone else. He definitely seems to feel the same. Considering that he didn’t hear Charlie pull up. I could tell it threw him off when Charlie walked in on us. Wonder if he’s ever had that happen before.

I could hear Charlie starting the shower. Which meant I needed to get ready. You see he thought it would be a fair punishment. While he’s at work. I go stay with Jacob. He’d rather me be locked in the house for a week, but he’s scared I would sneak Jasper in while he was gone. Honestly, I probably would have.

So this is probably the best thing he could come up with. Not that having to stay with Jacob for a week would be a punishment. I missed him. It had been a while since I’d been down to the Rez. Gosh the last time I’d seen Jacob was right before I got Edward from Italy. So like two, maybe three weeks.

I wonder what dad told Billy. Probably that I’m going through a phase, and have a dangerous boyfriend. What if I am? I’ve never really gotten the chance to be a teenager, and after trying to get Edward to change me I realized something. I'm never going to live this life again. Even if I’m immortal. This is the only time I get to be the original Bella Swan. After the change I feel like it's a whole other existence. Everything is different so, why would you be the same?

Not that it really matters anyway. I need to get dressed. Hmmm, what to wear? Considering I’m going to see Jacob. Nothing crazy, we'll probably just mess around in the garage till we find something better to do. I put on some dark wash jeans, black docs, an old black and red tie dyed t shirt with holes, and a flannel. So nothing I’m attached to. Just in case it gets messed up. Jacob and I always seem to get into some kind of trouble when we’re together.

Maybe I could convince him to teach me how to ride our motorcycles again. Last time I wasn’t in the best place mentality. I could do it now. I know it. Especially after riding with Jasper. The way he moved to make the bike do what he wanted, and with what Jacob had said made everything make a lot more sense.

On another note. I slide a hair tie on my arm for later. Just in case it gets hot. Like that ever happens. I grab my bag and start on my way down stairs. When I get to the bottom. Charlie is putting on the jacket I had used yesterday.

He turned around when he heard me step off the last stair. “Hey, bells if you use my jacket again could ya not put on so much perfume. You’re gonna make me smell like a girl.”, He chucked.

Smiling, I said, “Sorry, dad I didn’t want to be late finding another jacket.”

He raised an eyebrow, “Why did ya even need a jacket Bells. It wasn’t raining? You didn’t get on that boy's death trap did you. I don’t have to remind you how many young men I’ve had to scrape up, do I?”

You know sometimes it sucks having a cop as a dad, “No of course not dad. I just wanted it in case it got cold after school. I had worn it all day so that’s probably why it smelled like my perfume. I’ll try not to grab it again.”

“I don’t mind you wearing it kiddo. Just trying to lighten the mood.”

He looked so tired I had really put him through the ringer, “I know, I’m just tired dad.”

I went to grab my keys to head to Jacobs. When I turned around Charlie had his hand out. You’ve got to be kidding me?

He looked at me expectantly, “Keys Bells.”

God the tantrum I wanted to throw, but instead I just puffed, and dropped the keys in his awaiting hand.

He smiled and shoved them in his pocket, “Now I know you’re not happy about this Bella, but you need to learn that actions have consequences. Now get your stuff. I’m driving you over to Jacobs, and you will stay at his house until I come get you. No going into town or sneaking off. Do you understand?”

I sighed grabbing my bag at the bottom of the stairs, “Yes, dad I understand. Can we get this over with? You know how much I hate riding in the cruiser.”

He laughed, “Well get used to it kiddo. Because till I think you aren’t gonna pull some more shit. You aren’t going to be going anywhere I don’t take you.”

I crossed my arms, “Fine but that doesn’t mean I have to be happy about it.”

He grabbed his keys, and started walking to the door, “True but you might get out early on good behavior. So let's keep the sass to a minimum alright.”

I didn’t say anything to that. I didn’t have to. I already know that if I wanted life to be like it was before. I just needed to act like Bella, old Bella. Well she can’t come to the phone right now. Why? Oh, cause she’s dead.

By the time we got to Jacobs I was so deep in thought that when Charlie tapped my shoulder. I almost jumped out of my skin, “Jeez Bella, I was just trying to get your attention, but you were so spaced out. You had me worried there for a minute. Thought you were going back to how you were last summer.”

I rubbed the back of my neck, “Sorry, I didn’t mean to worry you, but I do miss Jasper. So I was just thinking about him. Could I call him tonight if I get a good note from Billy?”

Charlie looked hesitant, “Bells you know I want you to be happy right?”

Great here we go, “But do you really think this guy isn’t just some rebound to make Edward jealous?”

Reason number two on why I hate having a cop as a dad. He always calls me out on my shit. Whatever, I rolled my eyes, “Well it kind of started like that, but I don’t know. Jasper Makes me a happy dad. So does it really matter?”

Charlie rubbed his forehead, “You’re being safe right?”

Oh my god he did not just ask that. Haven’t we had enough of this talk when I was with Edward. Well he never did walk in on me and Edward together in his defense.

I sighed, “Yeah of course dad. So can I call him tonight please. I’ll be good at Jacobs, I promise.”

After my answer he seemed to get more stressed. I wonder why? Oh….. I implied we were… Oh shit he’s never going to let me see him again now.

He looked up and put his hands on the wheel, “Alright if Billy says you weren’t a menace you can call him for 30 minutes. For every bad comment from Billy you get an extra day added onto your sentence. This Jasper guy is not allowed at the house till that's over. Do you understand?”

Well this was a kind of shitty bargain on my side, but beggars can’t be choosers. “Yeah, sounds good dad. I’ll see after you get off work. I love you.”

His eyebrows pinched together, “Alright, love you too Bells.”

I hopped out of the car and walked up the driveway. When I was almost at the porch Jacob came running around the side. He tackled me in a big bear hug and spun me around.

While laughing I said, “Jacob, Stop spinning, I'm gonna barf.”

He set me down in one fluid motion. I felt a little wobbly on my feet.

He chuckled, “Damn, I didn’t know you had such a weak stomach Bells.”

I finally got my balance, “Screw you! You overgrown lap dog.”

He put his hand over his heart. Like I had shot him, “Bella my love you wound me. If words could kill. I would be no more.”

I shook my head in disbelief. He always could cheer me up. No matter what. He smiled and took my hand. We started walking to the shed. Falling right back into our old routine. He slid open the door for us to go in. Then closed it behind us. I went over to the rabbit, and took a seat on the driver's side like usual. Jacob pulled over an upside down plastic bucket, and sat in front of me.

He ran a hand through his hair and sighed, “So we have a lot to talk about.”

He’s right. Before Alice took me to Italy I had been considering Jacob as a possible end game. I wonder what he thinks is going on?

I crossed my legs, and played with the edge on my shirt, “Yeah we do. So what do you want to know? I promise to be honest, and not lead you on in any way on purpose. You deserve that at the very least.”

His eyes widened a little, and he bit his lip, “Bella why did you leave. I… I thought I made you happy. So why? Why did you need him?”

I figured, “Jacob I… I didn’t need him, but I couldn’t let someone die because of me. It would have been at least partially my fault. Now whether or not you agree doesn’t matter. Because, at the end of the day I couldn’t live with the thought that it was my fault that someone died.”

He nodded looking thoughtful, “Okay that’s fair. I don’t agree, but I understand why you needed to go. Okay for my next question. Are you and Edward back together? I just need to know before I ask anything else.”

Predictable Jacob, “No he and I are no longer together, and probably will never be.”

He looked shocked to say the least, “So you’re saying you’re single.” He ended it with a little eyebrow wiggle.

Jesus will this man ever give up. I chuckled, “Not exactly. It really depends on who you ask.”

He raised his eyebrow confused, “What the hell does that even mean?”

I sighed, “Ummm... it means that it’s complicated.”

He started rubbing the inner part of his hand where the thumb and forefinger attach, “But you said you were done with Edward so how is it complicated?”

I started scratching the nail polish off my nails, “I am done with Edward.”

“Then how is it complicated?”

I rolled my eyes, “There are people other than Edward.”

He suddenly stood up, “What the hell Bells? I have been trying to get your attention for months, and I haven't seen you for three weeks. All of a sudden you have a crush on some other dude.”

“I’m sorry Jacob. Him and I aren’t really dating. If that helps. Well Charlie thinks we are, but it’s not really any of his business anyway.”

“Who is it? So I know who I’m up against. You can’t win a fight if you don’t know your opponent Right?”

I smiled sadly, “I did promise to be honest didn’t I?”

He nodded very seriously and I said, “Fine but you can’t be mad at me, or hold it against me.”

“Who the fuck is it Bella. They can’t be that bad? The only thing that would be that bad was if it was another vampire somehow.”

I stayed quiet, “It’s not another vampire right Bella?”

I looked at the ground, “I’m sorry Jacob.”

“You’ve got to be kidding me. When will you learn your lesson Bella? Why can’t you just do what's good for you?”

I felt a tear run down my face. When did I start crying? “That’s what Charlie said.”

“Well maybe you should listen.”

I shrugged, “Maybe I’m just broken. I can never do anything right. I know that you would be the most reasonable choice Jacob, but that doesn’t really mean anything. Just because I know something doesn’t mean it's what my heart yearns for. Maybe, I get off on danger.” I snickered at the end remembering what Jasper said.

He rolled his eyes and took a deep breath, “So you never answered my question. Who is it?”

I looked up at him, “Jasper Hale although you might know him better at Jasper Cullen.”

Now let the shit show begin, “You’ve got to be kidding me? Which one even is that?”

I laughed, “Ummm the tall blonde that always wears cowboy boots.”

He got a real concentrated look on his face, “You mean the weird one. With all the scars and shit. I thought he was with the cute pixie chick.”

I stood up and rolled my eyes, “He's not weird. Just different is all, and he and Alice aren't together anymore.”

He threw his arm over me. I don’t even think he knew he did it till he went to talk, and had to look down at me. “Sure sure, just different. So are you guys just rebounding with the closest person or something?”

I slipped out of his arms, “So what if we are? How is that any of your business?”

He scrunched his eyebrows, “Holy fuck, are you guys boneing to get back at each others ex? That’s fucked Bella. No wonder you smell weird. You’ve let some leach be all over you.”

I am getting fed up at everyone thinking I’m fucking Jasper, “For you’re information Jacob. I haven’t fucked him.”

“So then why do you smell sour? I had just assumed it was because you hung around them so much, but it’s never been this bad. Don’t lie to me Bella.”

“We just messed around a little. That’s the reason I’m here in the first place. Charlie walked in on us drying humping on the couch.”

Jacob had the audacity to laugh, “Are you serious. A vampire got snuck up on. Dang, it must have been a pretty intense make out session.”

He was still laughing when I pulled down the collar of my shirt and showed the massive hickey that Jasper left on my neck. Yeah he stopped laughing real quick. He walked over to me and ran his thumb across the mark.

“Do you really think it’s safe to have a blood sucker that close to your neck?”

I shrugged, “Probably not but I wasn’t really thinking about that when he was between my legs you know.”

He grabbed his eyes, “Jeez Bells I really did not need the image of that in my brain.” He rubbed his eyes trying to get rid of the thought.

I giggled, “Hey, man you asked for it.”

He sighed, “You’re not wrong. Are you hungry? We’ve been here a while.”

I shrugged, “I mean yeah I could eat.”

We walked up to the house and Jacob made sandwiches for us. As I sat waiting all I could think about was how that could have gone so much worse, and as soon as I thought that Billy wheeled into the kitchen to ruin everything.

Chapter 7: Soaking in Reminiscence

Notes:

Chapter Song is Bloodstream by Stateless

Bella Pov:

While we were eating at the kitchen table. Billy rolled up in his wheelchair, “What have you kids been up to?”

Jacob choked down a piece of his sandwich, “We're just working on the rabbit and catching up. Bella’s got this new boy toy, and she had to tell me all about it.”

I glared at him from across the table. What kind of shit was he up to? Before, I could say anything Billy beat me to it, “Yeah Charlie was telling me you had a new boyfriend. Says he’s not the best influence on ya.”

I put my sandwich down and crossed my arms, “He's not all that bad once you get to know him. He’s definitely a better choice than Edward. At least he doesn’t try to micromanage my life.”

I hope that Billy doesn’t tell dad about everything. Billy sighed, “Now that I’m not so sure of considering what he is. Now I’m not judging your taste in men Bella, but couldn’t you find someone more human.”

I laughed, “What can I say? I like them cold. Emotionally and physically.”

I heard Jacob snicker on the other side of the table. I plopped my head on my hand and sighed, “I don’t get why everyone cares who I’m with anyway. It doesn’t really matter.”

Billy shook his head, “Bella we are just worried about you. After what happened when Edward left. Your dad is just taking precautions. Also, after what he told me if I were your dad I wouldn’t want you around this guy either.”

I started playing with the hem of my shirt, “What did dad say about him?”

He ran his hand over his forehead and sighed, “Charlie said he was a bad influence. Something about a delinquent who rides a motorcycle. Who’s going to get you in trouble or worse killed. He also said he was probably the reason you thought it was okay to get into that fight with that girl. Lets not forget the fact that he thinks this guy is taking advantage of you because, of your breakup with Edward. I think there was also something about him being on drugs. There was a lot more. I’ve never heard Charlie rave about someone like that. He didn’t like Edward but he could never come up with a reason why. So I didn’t hear much from him on that one.”

I huffed, “I know he cares, but sometimes I wonder if he thinks I’m still a kid. I can make my own decisions. Even if they turn out to be mistakes.”

Billy patted my hand, “I know you think that, but Charlie is just doing what he thinks is best. You can’t blame him for wanting to protect you, Bella.”

I sighed and stood up from the table, “I get that it just sucks. I just want to be able to act my age for once.”

I stand and start toward the door, “I'm going to go sit outside for a while. Please, can I just be alone?”

I looked over while I was closing the door and saw Jacobs' concerned face. Leaving was a good choice. Just because I have decided to no longer take peoples shit doesn’t mean I need to be a bitch. Also, I wouldn’t want to lose any shot I have at being able to call Jasper later. Oh man, I cant believe what my life is coming to. What the hell am I doing?

looking up I’ve realized that I've come to a tree. I sit by the base. Wrapping my flannel closer to my body. Then, I hear thunder in the distance and it begins to rain. Feeling the rain drops on my skin is soothing in a way. Like it's washing away all my wrong doings. All my sins. Maybe in some way it is? Who knows? I sigh and lean back, closing my eyes.

Why am I doing this? Sitting in the rain. Crying? When did I start crying? I miss Edward. In some fucked up part of my head I still love him. God I still love him so much! “UGGGGGG! WHAT A BASTARD!” I take in a breath that sounds more like a sob and whisper, “i hate him. i wish he were dead so i would never have to see his face again. then…. then…. maybe i wouldn’t feel this way.”

I open my eyes and see that Jacob has knelt down in front of me. He gives me a sad smile, and cups my face using his thumb to wipe away my tears.

I let out a half sob half laugh, “That's not gonna do much considering it’s raining Jacob.”

 

He frowns, “I’m worried about you Bella. Come on, talk to me. Tell me what's going on.”

“I….I just want to be happy and free. I’m so tired of people telling me what to do. And no matter what I do my thoughts always revolve around Edward when I’m alone. I’m so SICK and TIRED of thinking and obsessing about him. PLEASE JUST MAKe hiM Go AWAY!” I pull away and drop my head into my hands.

He moves forward and slides his hand behind my shoulders pulling me close. He smells of pine and wet dog. I giggle.

He pulls away enough just to see my face, “What are you laughing about?”

I giggle more hiding my face in his chest and take a deep breath, “Yep, you reek of wet dog. No doubt about it.”

He smiles and laughs, “You ass! Here I am trying to comfort you, and all you can talk about is how I smell. Well for your information I took a shower this morning. So yeah, take that.”

He sighs happily and then looks at me more seriously, “Bella, do you really like this guy you’re dating, or are you just trying to feel something after Edward?”

My eyes met his, “I don’t know Jacob, but I do know he never takes away my freedom to do whatever I want. Which is nice. Also, he is a really good kisser, and he’s got a motorcycle.”

He rolls his eyes, “You know, I’m a good kisser and I have a motorcycle .”

He slowly leans closer, “Or at least I could be if you just gave me a chance.”

He’s so close I could feel his breath on mine. Slowly drawing me into him. Just when we are about to touch I take a quick inhale of air, “I don’t know if this is a good idea. What about Jasper?”

I feel his lips barely brush mine when he speaks, making my heart race, “Does this feel like a mistake to you? I’ll do whatever you tell me, Bella. Just say the word and I’ll stop.”

Before I could even think he leans forward sealing the kiss. Holy shit. I… Fuck…. I don’t even know how to feel right now. I feel his hand go up to cup my face. I press myself into it unintentionally deepening the kiss. He pulls back just enough for me to see his face.

looking at me expectantly he says, “So was that better than Jasper, or do I need to practice on my pillow more?”

He was smiling. I pulled away and went to stand up, “Not bad for a dog. I expected more tongue.”

I laughed getting to my feet. At this point, I was completely soaking wet to the bone. “Oh come on Bella. Did I at least do better than eddy boy?”

I rolled my eyes and stuck my hands out for him to get up, “Honestly, yeah. Not better than Jasper. That man is a master I tell you.”

I smirk and he laughs good heartedly. He takes my hand and pulls harder than I was ready for. The ground was so slick that I ended up on top of him. Both of us were completely covered in mud. He was dying of laughter. He grabbed me by the waist to steady himself. “Only you Bella.”

He opened his eyes for the first since we fell, and realized the position we were in. I was straddling him with my arms up by his head. Holding myself up with my elbows. Only inches away from his face. Clearing his throat, “Are you okay? You didn’t hurt yourself did you?”

Did I? I didn’t feel any pain on my body. ”I don’t think so.”

Okay, let's see starting from the bottom up. Feet check, calf check, thigh check, wait what's pressure on my side? Wait, no way. It couldn’t be, right? I take a deep breath and say, “No I think I’m alright. Ummmmm…” and I made the mistake of looking up at his face, “Jacob?”

He has a distant look on his face, “Yeah Bells?”

Okay if I use the ‘I hurt my foot card’ I won’t have to deal with horny boy, but what if I didn’t mind it. Do I want him to feel like this toward me or not? I don’t know anymore. Jacob is undeniably beautiful, but I’m not sure if I want to lose our friendship for a stupid rebound right now.

Uggggg, the ‘I hurt my ankle’ it is then, “Actually I think I sprained my ankle. It's starting to ache. Must have been adrenal earlier.”

That made something click in his head, “Oh god, shit, okay. I’ll get us inside and warm. I should have brought you in, in the first place. That's what I came out here to do anyway.”

He sits us up and places me on the ground next to him. He stands up. Before I can complain, picks me up bridal style, and starts walking towards the house. “You know you didn't have to carry me.”

Smiling he whispers, “I know Honey but it’s just easier this way. You can’t slip again if I just carry ya.”

I just shake my head and snuggle into his chest. When we get back inside I realize how cold I am. I really hope I don't get sick. Sitting in the rain wasn’t my brightest idea. Jacob sits me down on his bed. “I’m going to rinse off real quick. Then, start you a hot bath. Okay?”

I give my best smile, “Yeah, that sounds good to me.”

I didn’t notice how tired I was till he sat me down. I hear the shower start. God I am bone tired. Maybe I’ll just take a quick nap while Jacob’s in the shower. Yeah that should be fine right? I curl up in a ball on the corner of his bed to get the least amount of mud on it.

Not long after I’m awakened to a naked Jacob? Wait no, he’s not completely naked. There is a towel around his waist. Thank god. He pats the top of my head and says, “Okay, sweetie I’ve got the bath running for you. I think you’ve got it from here.” He chuckles.

I yawn, “Yeah, I should be alright. Thank you. Is there any way I could borrow some clothes when I get out?”

He winks, “I already got you covered. I have them on the sink in the bathroom with a towel for ya. Hopefully they aren’t too big, they are from, before I you know, turned into a wolf.”

I roll my eyes, “They should be just fine. Thank you again.”

He smiles, “Anything for you Bella. Now, go in there before the tub overflows.”

“Yeah yeah. I'm still waking up, you know.”

“Sure sure. I also need to change, and unless you want to see the rest of me I suggest…”

“Okay, enough visuals. I’m on it.”, I get up quickly and almost forget to fake limp.

I get to the bathroom strip, and put my clothes in the laundry basket. He’ll get them back to me at some point. Turning off the water, and stepping into the hot water was god sent. It helped bring back the feeling into my limbs. Now, I really need to think about everything that has been going on lately.

Let's start with the pros. Okay first, Jacob since it’s still fresh on my mind. He’s been my best friend since forever. He was the only one really there for when all that shit with Edward happened. He always understands what I need before I need it. He would do anything for me. Anything I asked of him. With no question.

Now Jasper, he makes me feel alive never stifled. When he kisses me it sends me somewhere else far far away from this place. He was there when I needed a ride even though we aren’t super close. He helped me with the Jessica situation. Showed me that life doesn’t revolve around Edward.

Okay now, cons starting with Jacob. He’s a little controlling even if he doesn’t mean to be. He is pushy with the fact that he likes me more than just friends. Wet dog smell? He wants more than I can give. If we were to get in a relationship now. Would it just be a rebound and ruin our friendship?

Then Jasper, man I really don’t know him that well. Reckless. Just ending things with Alice. Once again is this a rebound? If so, would he care? Does that bother me? He’s too easy to fall for if this is all just another Edward situation. I don’t trust him to not leave.

So that’s 4 pros for Jacob and 5 for Jasper, and 5/4 cons for Jacob and 5 cons for Jasper. Okay so that didn’t clear much up. So I guess this is just going to have to work out somehow. I could always fix my issues with Jacob. He’s a good listener, and he would do anything to make me happy. Jasper is just an unknown at this point. I just need to get to know him better, and maybe I would feel more secure. I don’t know! This is driving me nuts.

That is if Jasper even wants anything to do with my dumb ass after he finds out about Jacob. If he did want nothing else to do with me. Would I just go to Jacob because I had no other options? If so, then I can’t do that to him. He deserves someone who will put their all into the relationship. Not to be a rebound and last resort.

I guess I’ll just get to know Jasper better and try to talk to Jacob about being so pushy. Then, I can see where things go from there and make a choice. Uggg not to be that girl but this is so hard. Two really hot guys like me and I can’t make a choice. Jessica would kill to be in my position. Well…. That thought gets cut off by Jacob knocking on the door, “Hey, just making sure you didn’t drown. Also, Charlie called and said he’ll be here in 30ish minutes.”

“I’m not dead. I’ll be out in a second.”

It’s quiet for a minute then I hear shuffling outside the door, “Okay, just don’t trip or anything. I know you hurt your ankle earlier.”

He can be so sweet, “I’ll be fine. I’ve made it this far haven't I?”

He laughs, “I guess, but not without a lot of bumps in the roads.”

I roll my eyes, “Sure sure.”

I pull the drain and stand up. I hold onto the shower curtain for balance. Well that was an awful idea because the rings are plastic and just popped off. Guess what? I fell and hurt my ankle. I guess that’s karma. At least it was the same ankle I said was messed up earlier. That’s a blessing in disguise.

“Holy shit Bells! Are you okay?”

I can do this myself, no need for Jacob to see me like this. “Ummmmm Yeah I’m fine. My ankle just gave out. Also, I need to buy you a new shower curtain.”

“Oh please, that thing was dry rotted to hell. I needed to get a new one anyway. I’m more worried about you. Do you need help?”

“NO! Just give me a minute.”

Bella you got this all you have to do is stand up. One knee and two half way there. Now to put pressure on my good foot to get up. Okay, let's see how bad it is. Just lean a little on the other ankle and “HOLY SHIT!”

 

“Bells, are you okay? I’m about to go in there.”

I hear the door knob start to turn, “AHH NOPE I’M FINE!”

So no leaning on that foot. I hobble like two inches to the left. Grab the clothes he left me. I throw on the much too big t-shirt and see he also left me some rather old black boxers and some basketball shorts. I sit on the toilet and get the boxers up to my knees, and I wiggle them up over my hips.

Considering they’re Jacobs they fit pretty well. They must be really old. Ick. I quickly do the same for the shorts. I stand up using the sink for balance and lean mostly on my good foot. I tie the drawstrings as tight as I can. “Okay, Jacob I’m decent. Can you help me get to the bed?”

The door opens and a concerned Jacob tumbles in, “Alright, let's do this.”

He slides his arm under mine and half carries me to the bed, “Can I borrow some socks?”

“Sure sure.” He goes through his drawer and pulls out a pair of long white gym socks. Geez, he's trying to make me look like a grandpa. He gets my shoes from the other room and sits in front of me. “What are you doing?”

He rolls his eyes, “Well I’m gonna check out your ankle, and while I’m down here I might as well put your shoes on for ya.”

“Thanks, I guess.”

He takes my ankle in his hands and moves it to check what’s tender and what not. He declares that it is indeed a sprain, and I’ll trust him on that because I hate doctors. He puts the socks on me. Then, slides on my boots making sure to lace them loose on my bad ankle. “Alright, you're set.” He pats the top of my boots then gets up.

Just as soon, we heard a honk outside. I guess Charlie is here. “Thank you, again.”

He raises one eyebrow, “For what Bells? You can’t help falling for me. Last time I checked, that's no reason to say thank you.”

Damn, he can always make me smile, “Whatever.. Haha, I just meant for everything just always being there for me and stuff.”

He gives me his big ole Jacob grin, “Now don’t start getting sappy on me Bella.”

We hear another honk, “Alright, let's get you to the car. Before, Charlie blows a gasket.”

“Sounds good”, I giggle.

We decide to just do what we did earlier, and he puts one arm under mine. We get out to the car in record time considering. He leans me against the hood, and opens the passenger side door. Then, he comes back to get me and we make it the rest of the way. He helps me into the car, “Alright, Bells now take it easy on that ankle. I’ll see ya later.”

He walks away and closes the door before I can respond. I look over at Charlie. He sighs, “So what happened and why are you wearing Jacobs clothes?”

“Well…. Me and mud don’t mix.”

He face palms, “Oh come on Bells don’t tell me you were out in the rain.”

“I ummm….. Me and Jacob were walking back from the shed. I slipped and hurt my ankle and got super muddy. So I took a bath and he let me have some clothes. They are a little too big… haha.”

I give him a sheepish smile, “Alright, I’ll let this one go, Bells. Please do try to be more careful. You had me worried when I saw Jacob carrying ya out.”

“I will, I promise dad.”

“On another note.” I pause fidgeting in my lap.

“Can you call your boyfriend tonight? That’s what you’re going to ask, right?”

I huff, “Well, yeah. Can I?..... I mean I didn’t do anything wrong. I’m just clumsy so…..”

He rolls his eyes then puffs, “You know what sure. You’ve been punished enough today. Also, I called Billy on my way over and he said you were on your best behavior. So I guess that’s all I can ask for.”

I grin super big, “OMG, Thank you. I can’t wait!”

He shakes his head and smiles, “Alright, only thirty minutes. Remember that's what we agree on.”

“Sure sure, whatever. That’s more than enough. Thank you, dad!”

We drive the rest of the way home in silence. All I can think about is calling Jasper and what I’m going to tell him. Uggg... that should be fun.

Chapter 8: Late Night Brooding

Notes:

Chapter Song is Tear You Apart by She Wants Revenge

:Waring it gets a little saucy:

Bella Pov:

 

Sitting on my bed in Jacob’s clothes I continue to wonder what I am going to tell Jasper. Do I tell him anything? Do I just tell him about my day like the kiss with Jacob didn’t happen. Looking at my phone sitting on my desk I continue to wonder. Are me and Jasper exclusive in any way. Like did I ch…BRingiggg….Ringgg… Who’s calling me? I walk over to my phone and see the caller ID says Jasper. Fuck, Okay. I’ve totally got this.

Deep breath, “Hello?”

“Hello, darling.”

I sat on my bed, “Why the call?” like I wasn’t going to call him earlier.

He chuckles, “Well can’t I call my girlfriend to inquire about her day?”

I shake my head, “Well I mean when you put it like that.”

“So, tell me how it was to spend time at the dog's house?”

“Hey now, be nice. Well it was fine we just caught up and stuff.”

“What kind of stuff?”

I start playing with the drawstrings on Jacobs shorts, “Well we messed around in the shed for awhile. We had lunch, talked to Billy, and uuum.. I sat outside for a little bit.”

I hear him clear his throat, “Bella it was raining outside most of the day.”

Am I shaking?, “Ye…yeah it was, wasn’t it? Weird?”

He sighs, “Isabella, why were you sitting outside in the rain alone?”

Is it hot in here? I can’t breathe, “Ummm… Jas.. umm I”

“Hey, are you okay?”

He sounds more urgent all of a sudden. Like he can still feel the emotion even over the phone.

“Uhh.. Jas.. I need.. I need..”

 

“What do you need sweetheart? Are you feeling unwell?”

“I kissed him!’

Silence.. Complete silence..

I clear my throat, “Jacob kissed me, and I think I kissed back. I don’t know anymore. I’m so confused and tired. I’m so sorry. I know that probably crossed a boundary. I didn’t mean to I…”

He interrupts me laughing, “Damn, with the way you were talking I thought something bad happened. Now, I get it Isabella. We are both going through some unsure times. Considering we both just came out of a serious relationship.”

“But I..”

“Now, I wasn’t finished, baby. If you decide to date Jacob, and you want him. Tell me!”, he ends with a growl. “But don’t get confused if you fuck him I’ll know, and this will be over. Done. Kissing and making out whatever. That’s not really all that important as long as you always come back to me to finish the job.”

Oh okay. So, he’s not mad. Thank god, “What do you mean finish the job?”

He chuckles. Then, says in a low voice, “Let him get you all worked up and needy. Then come to me and I’ll take care of you.” He takes in a sharp inhale, “I’ll fuck you till you can’t move let alone remember his name.”

I blush deep red… oh OH,” Yeah okay.. ‘Clears throat’ Yeah I can do that. I mean I can…. I think we can make that work.”

“Oh? You think so?”

“Umm yeah for sure. So anything but sex is cool?”

Holy shit! This is not what I expected my life to be, “Yeah, no Insertion. I don’t want him to make you cum either.”

Woah this is intense, “Umm that's cool. I can do that no doubt.”

“Good girl, now tell me…’Knock.. Knock..

Charlie outside Bella's room, “It’s been 30 minutes bells. I need that phone please.”

I clear my throat, “Hey, Jas I got to let you go. Dad wants my phone back.”

He groans, “Damn, talk to you later, pretty girl. Good night.”
Click…holy shit…I’m in such deep shit if Charlie finds out.

Knock… Knock.., "Bells, Phone”

“Yeah sorry dad. I was just saying goodbye.”

Get up and open the door, “Here you go.”

“Alright, now sleep well. We are leaving early again tomorrow morning.”

“Yeah, okay I’ll set my alarm.”

With that he leaves taking my phone with him. I close my door, set my alarm, turn off my light, and then lay down snuggling into the covers. I have no words for what I just agreed to. I guess this is what I needed right. Some danger and thrill in my life. Now, I just need to talk to Jacob tomorrow. Should I tell him the truth? That me and Jasper are faking a relationship, or just continue saying it’s complicated?

Well I mean it is complicated so that’s not a lie either. Ugggg… boys are so confusing. Speaking of which, Jasper is definitely confident that I’m going to sleep with him. Like we are not that close yet. A little make out doesn’t warrant sex. I mean I’m not complaining that a hot guy wants to screw me but still.

What did he say again? Oh yeah, that me and Jacob can’t have sex. Not that I was planning on it anyway. Well, that doesn’t mean I haven’t thought about it, but I’m not sure I’m even ready for that after Edward. He was my everything for the longest time, and I’m still getting over his stupid self. Why does everything always come back to him? I’m so sick of thinking of Edward.

All he ever wanted to do was own me. Which is super weird just let me say. I don’t want to be an object to fuck or win. I just want to be appreciated. Well, I think I do. I also think after Edward that I just want to have fun. Who says that either Jacob or Jasper has to be my forever. I could always find someone else later.

Someone who really loves and appreciates me. Someone who is normal and safe. NO vampires or werewolves. For now, I know I want this feeling of risk, and if that never changes. Then who am I to say otherwise. Maybe I will end up with one of these boys. There is no book to tell me who is going to be my forever. Well I might have to ask Carlisle if there is before I say that.

I look over at the clock and notice it is getting late. I should go to bed. So, I'm not absolutely exhausted tomorrow when Charlie takes me to Jacobs. I flip over getting extra comfy in the bed and think about pretty boys, picnics, and a field.

I wake up feeling a little disoriented. Where am I? I glance around and notice I’m in the clearing Edward took me too. Honestly just seeing it makes me nostalgic. But how did I get here? I sit up and notice Edward laying right next to me looking at me expectantly.

He laughs, “How did you sleep? You seemed to be dreaming an awful lot.”

What? Dreaming? What is going on?, “I uummm yeah slept well I guess.”

He smiled, “Well I’m glad. I know that walking up here is a lot for a human. Even though I helped some.”

“Umm yeah it wore me out… “

He raises an eyebrow, “You know you talk in your sleep.”

I rub my arm, “Uh.. ye..yeah mom used to say that.”

He laughs, “You know you were saying the weirdest things.”

“Oh yeah? Like what?”

“Well for one apparently you were talking to jasper a lot. You and Alice must have been hanging out or something.”

“Uh yeah something like that.”

“And then Jacob was coming up some. I know you miss him, but you know it isn’t safe to be around him. What if he hurt you Bella?”

I shrug, “I don’t know. I guess I would just be hurt. Even though I’m a human I still heal Edward.”

He grimaces, “Who knows if you could live through something like that Bella. There is just no way of knowing. So, we can’t chance it. Your life means more than that to me.”

Was he always this controlling, and I just never noticed. I raise an eyebrow, “So what? Isn’t that the glory of a human life? Dying.”

Looking away he frowns, “Eventually yes, but you’re too young to die Bella. You’re only 18. You have so much life to live. So I can’t allow you to waste it.”

Oh really? “Okay.”

“Okay? What do you mean by that Bella? You know at times like this I wish I could read your mind.”
I roll my eyes, “I said what I mean Edward. Okay. “

He started to get mildly frustrated, “Okay and what does that mean?! What are you thinking?!?”

He stands up and starts pacing, “Well it means that I agree that I will no longer waste my time here on earth. Especially since you will not even consider changing me.”

He stops pacing and squints at me, “Where are you going with this Bella?”

I shrug, “Take me home Edward. You have ruined the mood and I wish to go home now.”

He looks almost shocked, “Oh… Have I?”

He glares stalking forward, “You think you have any say in this Bella?”

I stand up and grab my bag, “You know what Edward? I don’t think I like the way you are talking to me right now, and I really don’t think I deserve this.”

He has the ability to look affronted, “You know I didn’t mean it like that Bella. Come on now there is no need to ruin today.”

I sigh, “Edward I would like to go home now Charlie will be expecting me soon and it’s getting dark.”

He stops for a second and thinks, “Okay… do you want to walk it or…?”, and points to his back.

I would usually tough it out and walk but I am so exhausted. I point to his back and he turns around for me to jump on. In a flash we are at Edward's vehicle. He lets me off his back and we walk back to his vehicle in silence. I hop in and he starts the car and soothing classical music comes through the speakers.

Sitting here with him It’s like we never stopped being together. Like he never left in the first place. Would I have stayed with him forever if he had never left. ‘Bel’ Did any of that shit even happen, or did I just have a wet dream about his brother? ‘bella’ Would I really be that bad of a girlfriend? “BELLA!”

I wake up startled with Charlie standing over me shaking my shoulder.

“Jesus, Bella you sleep like the dead. Now wake up and get dressed quickly for me. So, I’m not late for work.”

HUh? Oh I guess I was dreaming. I shake my head, “Uh yeah sorry dad. I guess I stayed up too late thinking.”
He raises an eyebrow, “I'm sure it was about how sorry you were for making me late. Now up you go.”, and he's leaves closing the door with a click.

Chapter 9: A Decision Must Be Made

Notes:

Chapter song: Cherry Waves by The Deftones

Bella Pov:

 

It’s been a couple days of me being grounded and going to Jacobs. I still haven't said anything more about Jasper to him. No matter how much he pries. Jacob can be so nosey sometimes. Today is the last day I’m going over there. Well, while being grounded anyway. Then, I have just the weekend alone with dad. Monday he said I will have to stay home because Billy is going to be busy.

He also said if he finds out that I’m up to anything fishy I am in for it big time. After that as long as I continue to be on good behavior I’m free. Well except Jasper can only come over when Charlie is here, and we have to keep the door open. He didn’t say I couldn’t go over there though, so there was a loophole. I do have an 8pm curfew now. Which is not ideal.

I guess I’m excited to finally be able to see Jasper again, but I’m also worried. We have been talking on the phone everyday. Just about ourselves. I’ve really gotten to know so much about him over the last couple days. Apparently he’s been having to leave the house to talk because Edward had such a fit about our first phone call.

Which, I can’t blame him, it was kinda a lot, to say the least. He said he would come pick me up for school Tuesday. I’m not gonna lie, I'm nervous. Mostly because I don’t know how to act in front of him. Over the phone it’s different but actually seeing him makes me feel unsure. Every time he’s next to me there is just this overwhelming feeling of lust. Something about him just makes me not think rationally anymore.

Anyway I need to get ready. I threw on some jean shorts, a black tank top, and some vans. Then grab a light jacket on the way out of my room just in case. It’s supposed to be hot today, but you can never be too careful here in Forks. I get a Poptart to eat in the car and then we are on our way.

We get to Jacobs and it’s just like every other day I've been down there. We sat in the shed for a while. Then, we grab something to eat while watching tv till Charlie gets back. Except, we went on a walk on the beach today. The weather was just so nice today. Pretty and hot with a good breeze.

He stopped all of a sudden, “Hey Bella, can I ask you a question?”

I turned toward him, “Umm yeah sure.”

“Will you be honest with me?”

I raised an eyebrow, “Jacob what is this about?”

He huffed, “Yes or no Bella?”

I shrugged, “Yeah, I’ll be honest with you.”

He rubbed the back of his neck anxiously, “Have you ever had romantic feelings for me, or am I just convenient for you? I don't mean that in a bad way. I just need to know. It won’t change anything about our friendship, I promise.”

Oh that's not what I expected, “Umm Jacob I..”

“Please Bella just tell me.”

“Well it’s not that easy Jacob.”

“Yes it is. Either you feel something or you don't, it's that simple.”

“It’s always been complicated with you. My head and my heart feel different. I know I like being with you. You can always make me smile when I'm sad. You’re my sun Jacob. You’re the right choice, but there is something in me where I can’t let myself be with you. I don’t know what it is. You always make me feel so safe and loved. There is just something that I just can’t get past.”

He frowns and tilts his head looking confused, “I’m gonna be so real with you Bella, I’m lost.”

I huff, “Me too.”

“So what you are saying is I make you happy?" He says with a big smile.

I grin because he is so sweet sometimes, “Well yeah you’re my best friend Jacob.”

He gets that confused look on his face again, “Okay. So what you’re sayin is no romantic feelings?”

I sigh, “I don’t know. I can’t tell. After Edward my brain doesn’t know how it should feel about boys.”

He gets a little closer, “Can I kiss you? You know to see if you feel anything.”

I giggle, “Jacob I am still with Jasper.”

He shrugs, “Well yeah but you said that last time too, but no pressure. I don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable.”

Should I? I mean Jasper said it was fine. I guess I can try just to figure everything out. What’s the worst that could happen?

I smile, “Well I guess we can. What’s the worst that could happen?”

He starts to fidget nervously, “Oh really?! I didn’t think that was gonna work.”

He laughs then steps closer and cups my face in his hand and then leans down till our noses touch.

“So do I just go for it or…”, I cut him off by sealing his lips with a kiss.

He doesn’t respond for a moment then he starts to move his lips with mine. They are warm and gentle. Not in the way Edward was with me, but in a loving way. Like he was cherishing every moment. It felt ….nice. I turn my head to deepen to kiss, breathing deeply through my nose. He, thankfully, doesn’t smell like a wet dog today. Just pine and the salt of the ocean.

I move my fingers to his belt loops pulling him in closer to me. I felt more than heard the moan that came from him, as I did so. Which prompted one of my own. The hand that wasn’t holding my face came around to play with the ends of my hair that had fallen on my shoulder. Jeez he is so sweet. He must really love me. Man do I feel bad now.

I mean I never tried to string him along, but did I? I guess while I was lost in thought I stopped responding as much. He pulled away enough to see my face. “Is everything okay?”

He moved a stray piece of hair from my face, “Yeah I’m just thinking. There’s an abundance of emotions going on in my noggin.”

He does his cute sideways smile, “I’m sorry I didn’t mean to spring all this on you. It just kinda came out.”

“Hmmm, sure sure.”

“What?”

I smile, “Nothing.”

His eyes flicker down to my lips again, “Can I kiss you again?”

I move my hands up his chest then slowly link them behind his neck. “Well I don’t know? Did you like it?”

He blushes down to his neck and moves his hands shakily to rest on my hips, “Umm.. yeah it was amazing. You’re amazing.”

“Then I guess you can kiss me again. I’m still feeling everything out.”

“Uh okay, yeah I can do that.”

He leans down to kiss me again when we hear a loud strike of lighting in the distance.

He pulls away looking up to see that the clouds have turned black, “Aww man that sucks. We better get inside. It looks like it could get bad.”

We start walking back when it begins pouring down suddenly. Giggling like kids we run trying fruitlessly to out pace the rain. By the time we get back to Billy’s I notice that dads patrol car is sitting in the driveway. We bust into the kitchen soaking wet to the bone and laughing like loons.

“Oh man Bella, you really know how to book it. It was like watching a baby deer run.’

I glared at him while still laughing, “Oh yeah well at least I don’t hit my head on trees mister too tall.”

He smirks, “Is that really all you got mister too tall. That's a compliment Bella.”

“Sure sure whatever you say. Now do you have my clothes from the other day? I wanna change into something warm.”

He smiles, “Yeah I washed then yesterday. Come on, I'll show you.”

I followed him to his room where he had all my clothes folded on the top of his dresser. I took them and got dressed in his bathroom really quickly. I just threw my wet clothes in his basket.

I walked out making sure to close the door behind me, “So I guess I…” And then I looked up. There he was in just his boxers, and soaking wet hair. Damn I’m in for it. Am I drooling? I go to whip my mouth to make sure.

He smiles and wiggles his eyebrows, “You wanna see more”, and he pops the elastic of his boxers.

I walk up to him and whisper in his ear, “It’s going to take more than a little make out on the beach to get me to fuck you Jacob Black. Now put your pants on.”

I giggle then leave, closing the door behind me. I make my way into the living room where Dad and Billy are watching a rerun of a game. Dad looks up, “Ya’ll where making quite the racket.”

I smile, “Sorry dad we were racing back from the beach.”

He shakes his head, “Now, I guess I’ll see you later Billy. Thank you for taking care of my delinquent.”

“It’s no problem Charlie, she's always a delight to have. She is always welcome to come.”

Charlie nods, “I’ll tell you what, that boy of yours is a great influence on her.”

Billy snorts, “For now, he’ll be getting into something by the end of the day I’m sure. Now get out of here. Enjoy the rest of your day. It was nice seein you. We’ll meet up soon for fishin.”

“It’s always a pleasure. Alright Bella you got everything?”

“Yep! I should have everything.”

He gets up and starts walking toward the door. When Jacob comes strolling out of the bedroom. “Are you out of here already, Bells?”

I smile, “Yep I gotta go. I’ll see you soon, I promise.”

He laughs, “Well, I know you’re still grounded but if Charlie is okay with it and you want to. We are having a bonfire on Monday at sun down. I’d love it if you were there.”

Charlie raises his eyebrow, “Is there going to be alcohol?”

He laughs, “No no well not unless you're an adult. Dad is going to be there. It's a community event. All ages are welcome so nothing sketchy.”

Charlie nods, “Well I’ll talk to Billy about it later and think about it. Would you be able to come pick her up? She isn’t getting her driving rights back till Tuesday.”

“Umm yeah that shouldn’t be a problem. The rabbit is still running.”

“Alright I’ll let Bella know Monday, and she can call you if she wants to go.”

 

Jacob smiles big, “Thank you!”

Dad rolls his eyes, “Alright Bells let's hit it.”

“Alright dad.”

I turn to Jacob and notice he has his arms out for a hug. I walk over and snuggle my head into his chest. He holds me tight, putting a kiss on my forehead, and slowly letting me go.

“Bye honey I’ll see you soon.”, He says while giving me a pat on the head.

I smile, “See you soon Jacob.”

Man why are boys so..so.. Ugggggg. I get in the car with dad and proceed to have our usual silent drive back to the house. He parks the car then askes, “Hey Bells, are you going to tell that Jasper boy about Jacob?”

What? Why is he asking me that? “Huh what do you mean?”

Charlie raises an eyebrow, “Bells, if I was Jasper I wouldn’t be too happy to have a boy all on my girl. I saw the way he kissed you, Bells. That boy has it bad. I may not like him Bella, but no one deserves to be cheated on. Now I know you’re not like that sweetheart, and even if you were I wouldn’t love you any less.``

He is not trying to have a talk with me about boys. Let alone about me cheating. Oh god nooooo., “Dad I don’t think this is necessary. I’m dating Jasper. Jacob is just a friend. That’s the end of it.”

Charlie shakes his head, “Now that’s how it always starts. He’s just a friend then one day he’s going to ask for more. Jacobs is a good boy. I don't think he’s going to hurt you, but I worry you might get your heart broken if you’re not careful. Maybe even something worse if Jasper were to find out you were with Jacob and got angry.”

I put my hands up, “Hold up! For one, I am not cheating on Jasper dad. For two, Jasper knows everything that happens at Jacobs. We call everyday and I tell him everything. For three, he actually thinks it’s good for me to have a variety of friends.”

Charlie scratches the back of his neck nervously, “Okay, that is a relief. Sorry Bells, I just worry sometimes with all the stuff I see at work. I didn’t want you to end up like one of the girls I see coming into the station. All bruised up and crying.”

Oh dad, “Jasper would never hurt me dad. He’s not like that, you just have to give him a chance.”

He leans forward gripping the wheel slightly, “Bells I know you like him, but he’s the textbook of a bad idea. If he wasn't, why didn’t I know about him sooner. At one moment you’re back with Edward then all the sudden you’re dating his brother. That doesn’t make any sense.”

Well he’s not wrong considering, “I was going to tell you dad I promise. Me and Edward had broken up pretty recently. If I’m being honest we were a little quick on the draw.”

“Bella, be honest with me. Do you actually like this Jasper boy?”

Thanks dad for making me make a decision on the spot.
“Well Bella? Do you like him or not? I don’t want to waste my time getting to know him if you’re just going to move on in a month because he was a rebound for Edward.”

Damn harsh much? But he’s right I really do need to commit myself to one or the other at least for now. I’m sorry Jacob, “Yes, I actually like him dad. I know you think he’s a bad influence and he might be a little bit. I’m not going to lie. He’s not as bad as you think he is. He’s not on drugs. He makes straight A’s, and he’s a lot less controlling than Edward was. He trusts me to make the right decisions, and thinks that I am capable of anything. It’s very refreshing.”

He relaxes a little, “Oh thank god. I love you more than the world Bells, but I can’t raise another baby.”

“Dad!”

Charlie laughs, “HAHahha.. I’m just messing with you Bells. I know you’re smarter than that. Now let's get in and get some rest. Good talk kiddo.”

He sits up taking the keys out on the ignition and begins walking toward the house. Damn, dad what the hell? I slowly get out of the car gathering my stuff and head into the house. As soon as I see my bed I collapse into a deep sleep.

Chapter 10: Uncharted Waters

Summary:

Chapter Song: I Want You (She’s So Heavy) by The Beatles

Jasper POV:

The last few days have been boring as hell. Without Bella around to mess with Edward I’ve had nothing interesting to do. Everyday at school is dull. I go to school then I leave, never actually remembering anything. Alice has been weird lately also. She said ‘that I should be more thoughtful when I talk to Bella, or I might run her off’. I think she’s just mad she can’t see our futures.

Whatever it may be, everyone’s been acting weird since her and I had our first phone conversation. Alice especially, she's been acting like I’m going to scare Bella off. I honestly don’t think that’s possible. After everything we have put her through. The fact that she is still here should be proof enough.

Edward made sure to show his ass after the phone call between us, the other day. He threw a fucking fit about how I shouldn’t let her even be around the wolfs. Also if I had any sense I wouldn’t touch her because I could kill her blah blah blah. That if I touch her I’m dead because she’s his. I’m disgusting for letting the wolf touch her. I think if she wants a hoe phase in her human life she should have it.

Because if I change her I expect at least some loyalty. Although, I’m an understanding man. She is her own person in the end. I don’t think she is an object to own or keep, unlike Edward. I don’t know why he thinks I let her do anything. I wouldn’t control her even if I could. It’s better in the end when they want you on their own accord. I’d rather be picked than force someone into a decision.

All that nonsense. I’m sick of it. Of them treating me like I’m menace to society. That I can’t control myself, or worse thinking I’m going to hurt Bella. God Damn, what a bunch of hypocrites! When she cut herself at the birthday party I knew how they were all feeling. If they would have not felt that way. I wouldn’t have lost control!

It’s so hard to keep control when you feel everyone else's bloodlust around you. I cracked. I should have been more prepared. Well I am now. When we left I made sure that I would never lose control like that again. I wouldn’t let myself.

God, I miss Bella. We have been talking on the phone everyday since that fateful day at school. About nothing crazy, but it has been nice to actually get to know her. I wish we could talk more than thirty minutes, but her dad has been very strict about her phone use. I wonder if I could call her today on her home phone? Considering it is Sunday and said that she and Charlie will be home. I still don’t know if Charlie would be cool with that. I definitely don’t want to cross any more boundaries with him if possible.

Although, I don’t think it matters much. Considering he doesn't like me anyway, or at least that’s what Bella tells me. I guess I could call her and see if she picks up. If he picks up I’ll just play it off or something. I pick up my phone, scrolling through all the numbers.

There it is ‘Click’. Ring… ring…..ring… rustling, “Hello, Chief Swan speaking.”

Oh shit! I clear my throat, “Hello, Chief Swan this is Jasper Hale. I was wondering if I could speak with your daughter. If she is willing of course.”

“Hummm.. Jasper was it? Well she is busy at the moment, but why don’t you come down for dinner. The weather is supposed to be nice today, and I’m having some people over for a cookout.”

That means that the wolves might be there, but if I don’t go Charlie will probably think less of me. “I would be more than glad to join y'all. What time should I be heading out?”

I hear Charlie call from a distance, “Hey Bells, what time should I let everyone know to come down?”

She yells back, “Umm probably 5ish dad. I know Jacob will be coming at 4:30 to get Billy set up. I know that the Clearwater's will be here later. Why? Didn’t you call them earlier?”

“Yeah I was just inviting Jasper, Sweetheart.”

I hear fast footsteps then Bella loud and clear, “What do you mean you’re inviting Jasper?”

“Well he called asking to talk to you. So I thought since you’ve been grounded that you might want to see him.”

“Well yeah but..”

“But what Bells? You said you wanted me to put more effort into getting to know him.”

Did she really say that? Does that mean she actually likes me outside of this stupid joke on Edward?

Charlie continues, “Also I thought it would be good for him to get to know Jacob. Since y'all are ‘best friends’.”

I hear her huff, “Yeah I’ll admit that’s a good idea. Did he say yes to coming? I really miss him.”

Charlie laughs, “Here let me ask.”

Speaker noises, “Hey are you still there son?”

I cleared my throat, “Yes sir.”

“Bella wanted to let you know that she wants you here. Also that you can come by around 4. If you’d like.”

He wanted to talk to me before anyone else went there. Man I’m nervous, “Sounds great I can’t wait to meet everyone.”

“Yes, well we are having about five people come by. Anyway, how do you like your steak cooked son?”

Oh thank god the one thing I can stomach, “Rare sir, make sure she’s bloody.”

I hear Charlie laughing, “Alright, we’ll see you then. Bye, Jasper.”

“See y’all soon. Goodbye.” Click.

Fuuuckkk! I am so screwed. Well it would be a good time to get to know both Charlie and Jacob better. I probably should have left before I called because I heard Edward Yell, “You son of a bitch!”

I’m honestly not in the mood, “Edward, I’m about sick of you!”

Then nothing, that is better than a reply. Anyway, what am I going to wear? As soon as I think that I hear a knock on my door, “Hey Jasper, my fashion sense is tingling.”

I opened the door and let her in, “Yeah Charlie invited me to a cookout tonight. I was thinking something nice but more on the casual side.”

Alice grins, “I know just the outfit that will get you the best response.”

I chuckle, “I’m sure you do.”

She digs in my closet for a few moments before laying out an outfit and shoes. To be honest they are not my style at all. It’s just a little too clean cut. When have I ever worn khakis? Anyway the shirt is alright I guess. It’s just a light blue button down, but blues are not really my color.

“You hate it don’t you?”

I smile, “I know that this is what I should wear Alice, but it’s just not me. I want them to like me for being myself. Not some clean cut guy. I really appreciate the help though.”

She frowns, “Okay yeah it’s no problem. Just don’t wear the cowboy boots and you should be fine.”

I raise an eyebrow, “Well we’ll see about that.”

She shakes her head, “I tried to warn you.”

Then she leaves. What the hell? Sometimes I wonder what is going on in her head. Why wouldn’t I wear my cowboy boots? I grab a dark green button up flannel, dark wash distressed jeans, and my favorite pair on black cowboy boots. I turn and look in the mirror. That’s much better. I then fix my hair making sure it looks nice. I wish she would run her hands through it. Fuck.

I should start heading over soon. I grab the keys for my black 82 Honda CB900F. As I’m walking to the garage Carlisle stops me, “Jasper I know that you are doing much better, but will you be able to control yourself?”

Why can no one ever trust me? Fuckers, “Yeah I’ll be just fine. Considering I won’t have to feel the bloodlust of five other vampires.”

I keep walking to the garage. I get to the door pulling it open and begin to leave. “I know that Jasper but I still worry. I know that you are tired of us hovering.”

“Yeah, I am pretty tired.” Then I leave slamming the door. The garage door is already up because Rose was working on the Jeep. I roll my bike out and jump on before anyone could convince me otherwise.

The drive was nice and helped me cool off. I pull up to the Swan house about ten minutes after four. I see the smoke from the grill and Charlie right behind the fence on the side of the house. He sees me pull up, and I realize I’m not wearing a helmet. Nice going idiot. He waves me over. I put the kickstand down on my bike then head over.

“Sorry I’m a bit late. Carlisle wanted to talk before I left. He wanted to make sure I was on my best behavior.” I laugh and open the fence gate.

Charlie nods, “He do that often?”

I shrug, “Only to me. I couldn’t tell you why.”

I heard the door open and Bella came out holding too many things. “Hey darlin’, be careful. Here let me help.” I walk over taking half the stack of plates and what not. Then start setting the table they have outside.

I notice Bella look up, “Oh Jasper! I didn’t even notice that it was you behind all that stuff.”

She runs around the table jumping into my arms, and wrapping her legs round my waist. I hold her there, nuzzling my nose into her neck. “Oh how I’ve missed you.”

“I’ve missed you so much Jasper! I’m glad you came today.”

I slowly let her down, still holding her close. She is just as beautiful as I left her. I lower my head and give her a quick peck on the lips. “Oh darling, you are so breathtaking.”

She giggles, “Oh don’t be silly I’m not anything special.”

 

I roll my eyes, “Well that is in the eye of the beholder my love. I’ve never seen that dress before. It looks wonderful on you.”

She was wearing a dark green gingham sundress then ended right before her knees. She was also wearing her black combat boots. We kinda matched considering we didn’t plan it. I wonder why Alice didn’t want me to wear this then.

She blushes god I love when she does that, “Oh thank you. You look awful handsome yourself.”

I smirk, “We clean up pretty nice I’d say.”

She giggles, “If I didn’t know any better I’d say we planned our outfits.”

“We are matching awfully nice. Aren’t we?”

She lets go and starts walking to the kitchen, “I’d say so. Anyway I still have some food to finish up. Why don't you get comfortable?”

I start to follow her, “Is there anything I can help with?”

“No, you go relax. I’m just finishing up.”

Why doesn’t she want me to help? She turns around and comes close whispering in my ear.

“I want you and Charlie to get to know each other. Also he might be weird if we are in the house alone.”

Okay that makes more sense. She pulls back smiling. “Alright, your wish is my command.”

I bend slightly at the waist. Taking her hand and lightly kissing the top of the knuckles. I let go. Slowly standing back up to my full height, and notice she is blushing all the way down her neck. How cute. “Okay well ummm…. Yeah I’ll be in the kitchen if you need me.”

Then she quickly walks to the back door. God she is just stunning. Now I need to talk to Charlie. What do I even say to him? It’s not like I’m some normal teenage boy. Even when I was actually 18 I was a Major in the war. I’m not exactly equipped for this talk. Whatever, I'll just wing it.

Good thing I didn’t have to because Charlie beat me to it. “You always ride that death trap with no helmet?”

Great. I knew he noticed, “Well not always. Only when I’m in a rush.”

Charlie hums, “Yes I guess you would be. With that talk from your father and all.”

Does he think that badly of me? He continues speaking, “What does Carlisle think of you dating Bella? Does he find it odd that she has also been with Edward.”

Oh? I didn’t think he was going to be so forthcoming. “Well if you want me to be honest. He thinks I’m being immature. That I’m just doing it to mess with Edward.” I shrug and sit in one of the lawn chairs closer to Charlie by the grill.

He narrows his eyes, “Yet he still allows it?”

I smirk, “Well he can’t exactly stop me. Although he does try to persuade me. It never really does take much effect. I just wish that Edward would be more civil about the situation. He really is quite irritating.”

“Oh really is he? I would have never thought. He always seemed like a well mannered boy.”

I laugh, “Oh please, Edward is the most petty teenage boy I’ve ever met.”

Charlie shakes his head, “What if Bella were to change her mind and go back to him? Afterwards, when they get over this spat.”

“I guess I would respect her wishes. I would fight for her of course. Don’t get me wrong, but I’m never going to take away her decisions. She can do as she pleases. I just have faith that she’ll pick me, and that’s all I need.”

His face goes unreadably but I can feel his inner conflict. He started out with mostly distrust toward me. Now he isn’t sure. That’s good I’m making some headway. He goes back to cleaning the grill. Making sure that it is nice for the steaks.

I look over and notice that Jacob has pulled up with Billy. “Oh look, that's Billy and Jacob. Bella's best friend.”

I smile, “Yes I’ve met him a time or two. I’m going to go see if Jacob needs any help getting Billy set up.”

Charlie's feelings are all over the place. I walk over to the Blacks, and I’m hit with a huge wave of exhaustion. It seems like it’s coming from Jacob. He pulls himself out of the driver's side door and man he looks bad. Dark circles under his eyes and his hair is a mess.

I walk up slowly so I’m not perceived as a threat, “Hey, need any help?”

Jacob looks up, seeming started, “Oh hey, I didn’t notice you there. I’m not really on my game today I guess.”

“You okay?” He is currently leaning against his car. He definitely looks like he’s had better nights.

“Huh sure sure. I’m fine, just tired. I was out patrolling most of the night.”

I nod, “It’s hard work. I did it often when I was in the military.”

Jacobs eyebrows raise, “Yeah but you don't get tired, right?”

I laugh, “I mean when I was human.”

I cross my arms, “Why don’t you get some rest on the couch. I’ll get Billy set up.”

He narrows his eyes, “How can I trust you won’t do anything fishy?”

I roll my eyes, “Like I’m going to do anything with Charlie and Bella around. I know better. If I wanted to do something it wouldn’t be disguised as a favor.”

He stands for a moment longer then looks at the house in longing. “You screw up and you're a dead bloodsucker.” He then runs toward the house.

I laugh and open the passenger side door. Billy is glaring at Jacobs' backside. “Is your chair in the back?”

He begrudgingly tells where it is and how to set it up. I get the chair beside the passenger seat of the car and help him get in. He looks at me questionably, “I don’t think I’ve ever met you before. Are you one of the Cullen's?”

I smile, “Technically yes, but I haven't been for very long.”

He raises an eyebrow, “Jacob is getting a little too comfortable with y’all these days.”

“I’m going to be honest with you sir. You couldn’t be safer than you are right now. Especially with all the people around.”

I start to push him toward the back yard. “So you said you were in the military. Which war did you fight in?”

I cringed a little, “I was enlisted at the age of 16 as a confederate soldier. At the age of 18 I was a major for the confederate army. I’m guessing you can figure the rest out.”

He nodded, “You’re older than I’d thought you’d be.”

“Yeah well, you haven’t seen me in battle. It would change your mind real quick like.”

We stop talking there because we are in the earshot of Charlie. Charlie then looks up asking, “Where did Jacob head off to?”

“He went inside to get a quick nap.” That's all I said to elaborate.

Billy shrugged, “He was up last night trying to get the beach cleaned up for the bonfire. Him and some of the boys were up till 3 or 4 am if I’m thinking right.”

Charlie eyebrows rose, “Well dang I didn’t know. I didn’t mean for y’all to be stressed about coming out here.”

Billy laughed, “There ain’t much I’d rather do than sit and talk over a good steak.”

I pushed Billy till he was sitting close to Charlie. Charlie looked over at me, “Hey son would you mind and grab the steaks from Bella. I’m going to go ahead and throw them on.”

I nodded, “Yes sir.”

I came in and saw Bella and Jacob chatting. “I thought I told you to get some rest.”

Jacob looks like a kicked puppy, “Well yeah, but I was just catching up with Bells.”

Bella laughs, “I’ve been telling him to go lay down. He’s just excited for the steak.”

“Speaking of steaks, Chief Swan wanted me to grab those.”

“Oh! He’s ready to grill all ready?”

She fumbles around the kitchen getting everything together. “Okay, here they are and the sauce stuff. Umm that should be everything he needs. Thank you Jas!”

I shake my head. Doesn’t she know I would do anything for her. She’s got me wrapped around her finger. I lean down and give her a quick kiss on the lips before taking everything to Charlie. I don’t miss the look that Jacob gives me on the way out.

“Alright where do you want everything, sir?”

“Right here will be just fine.” He says motioning to the table closest to the grill. I set everything down and head back toward the kitchen.

“Where are you going?”

“I was going to help Bella. She probably needs help setting everything up out here.”

He nods, “Alright just be careful around my daughter. I don’t want to see anything like the last time you were over here.”

Oh yeah, that was definitely not my brightest moment, “Yes sir. That is not going to be an issue.”

“It better not be.”

I turn and head into the kitchen once again. Jacob is finally sleeping. Thank god. I turn to Bella, “Now that Charlie is done giving me the fifth degree. Can I help you get everything set up?”

She smiles, “That would be wonderful thank you Jasper.”

Chapter 11: Dulled Sparkle

Notes:

Chapter Song is Taking what's Not Yours By: TV Girl

Jacob POV:

Sleep, that's all I really want. A nice long nap. Even forever maybe. Although it would probably make Bella sad if it was forever. Would it? Now’s probably not the time to think about it. She’s so pretty in that little dress. Why did that bloodsucker have to taint it by matching with her?

I prop up on the counter watching Bella prep everything. Usually I would ask to help, but I am dog tired…. Get it. Anyway, “Hey Bells, why didn’t you warn me about the ‘boyfriend’ being here? It’s not that this isn’t your house, and you can have who you want over. It just would have been nice to know…. I would have still come and everything. I Just ....” Why is she still silent? “I’m sorry I know you like him. It’s just–”

She turns around quickly, “Well for your information, Jacob. Dad decided to invite him. He thought it would be a good time to make an effort to get to know him. Also he just called about thirty minutes ago sooooo not really enough time for me to call you.” She paused and bit her lip, “I can’t lie and say I didn’t miss him. I just wish Dad would stop hogging him.”

She giggles… I can’t believe it… Bella giggled. She doesn’t do that. Damn I might have some real competition this time. I thought maybe with her kissing me that she would pick me, but now I’m not so sure.

“Sure sure… Soooo are you coming to the bonfire Monday?”

She shrugged, “I don’t see why not. Especially if it’s not too cold, but I guess that doesn’t matter with the fire there.”

Thank the spirits, “Good I’m glad to hear it. It would be boring without you there to keep me company.”

She shook her head smiling, “Yeah whatever. Now go take that nap. I'm trying to work here.”

Mocking her, “Yeah whatever.”

She smiled and turned away to keep cooking and what not. Damn this couch is mighty comfy. I’ll just rest my eyes, that's all.

Crrreeaakk… that must be the door opening. I wish that Jasper guy would figure out if he wanted to be inside or outside. Why do they have to smell so bad? Bleach is an understatement.

“What else can I help you with darlin’?”

“I think we’ve done just about everything, Jasper. You know you don't have to work this hard. I can handle it” Damn, I totally should have offered to help.

“I know I know… but a beautiful girl like yourself shouldn’t have to do all that. Especially with me around. On another note it looks like Jacob finally got that nap?”

Shuffle, “Yeah I’m worried about him you know. I feel like Sam is asking too much from them sometimes. He’s like this most of the week. It can’t be healthy.”

“He is a wolf, you know. Not much can hurt them. He would tell you if something was wrong Bella. Let’s try not to worry so much.”

“Yeah I guess, I’ll just ask him about it later. Maybe give Sam a piece of my mind at the bonfire Monday.”

Breathing, “Bonfire?”

“Hmmm oh yeah. Jacob invited me to their Spring bonfire. It’s better than staying home grounded alone with dad. I’d rather not be watching sports on the couch all day, so I said yes.”, She ended it with a laugh.

‘Shuffle’ “Did I say something wrong?”

Jasper clears his throat, “No it’s not that.”

“Well then what is it?”

“Why didn’t you tell me you had a date set with him? I know I said I was fine with him, but I would like to know about things of this nature.”

Silence… Why are they being so quiet? Why did Jasper think the bonfire is a date? I mean I wouldn’t mind if it was…. Shouldn’t he be more mad?

“You’re right I should have told you, but to be fair it isn’t a date.”

“Isn’t it. A guy you’re interested in asked you to an event to spend time together. That sounds like a date to me. Not that I would stop you…. As long as you understand our agreement.”

“Uuuhh yeah about that… Why?”

“That’s a loaded question sweetheart. Now's not the time for a heart to heart okay. I need you to confirm you understand our agreement. Then, I’ll let this whole date mess go.”

“Fuck, yeah I understand okay. I’m not going to fuck him. If that’s what you’re worried about.”

“Good girl, now tell me what to do sweetheart.”

HOLY SHIT!!! This guy is an asshole. Walking red flags much? Bella’s not a slut why would he even be worried about that? They haven’t even had sex….yeah no I would be able to tell. Controlling much. She can do whatever she wants. Agreement… Bella never told me about that. I wonder what that means? Man is this couch comfy…..

Bella's POV:

Damn, Jake snores so loud. How does he not wake himself up? Jasper is outside bringing the last load of sides and what not to the table. I on the other hand am trying to convince Seth not to wake Jacob up with ice down his shirt. It’s a lot harder than you might think. Leah and Sue are talking with dad and Billy over by the grill.

“Hey Seth, dad looks about done with the Steaks. Will you take the ice cooler out for the drinks? It’s a bit too heavy for me.”

He looks like an excited puppy, “Yeah, I got you. Strong man Seth is on it!”

I didn’t realize how dark the back of my eyelids were, “Yes. Thank you, strong man Seth, you really are my hero.”

Out he goes taking the cooler where now Jasper is directing him. What a sight. I still get tickled with how Seth is around the Cullen's. Nothing better than him thinking that Edward of all people is cool. Now to wake up Jacob. I just hope he isn’t all grumpy after his nap.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

I spin around, “Jesus, Jake announce yourself! You scared me half to death! I thought you were still sleeping.”

He yawns while standing up, “No I heard you arguing with Seth. Next time let him ‘prank me’, I was going to scare him so badly. He totally would have peed himself.”

Again I see the back of my eyelids, “Yeah yeah whatever, Sue me for trying to help.”

He’s smiling again or well he was, “What is it?”

“ I umm…I promise I wasn’t eavesdropping or anything, but what was… Why does he think you’re a slut? Like why would he be worried about us having… you know?”

“..... Ummmm… That’s kinda a loaded question.”

He shifts, “Does he like you know?”

I raise an eyebrow, “Does he know what?” I'm just realizing how much I gesture with my hands. Yay another thing to be insecure about.

He sighs, “Does he know we kissed?”

I shrug, “Well…. Yeah… It would be weird if he didn’t.”

He shifts uncomfortably, “It’s weird that he does Bella.”

I shrug, “Is it I mean… He’s technically my boyfriend. It felt dirty not telling him I was ‘cheating’” Really air quotes. Come on Bella, grow up. That is so middle school.

Jacob raised an eyebrow, “I thought he wasn’t actually your boyfriend, or were you just lying to me? I mean I don’t get it Bella. I’m doing everything I can to be the bigger person.”

Damn it… this is not what I wanted to talk about, “Let not talk about this right now where everyone can hear. I know you fuckers can hear through walls.”

He shrugs, “What does it matter Bella as soon as I shift they see everything anyway, or are you just worried about your boyfriend getting jealous?”

Who knew your head could feel like jello from too much thinking. These boys are going to put me in an early grave.

“What's going on in here? I got the steaks cooked.” Charlie to the rescue, thank god for small miracles.

I smile, “Nothing much I was just waking Jacob out of a coma. I’m starved!”

Charlie rolls his eyes, “I know that feeling. Now come on kids, let's eat.”

Jacob looked like he was trying to get my attention, but I took my chance to run away. Ducking under Charlie's arm and running out into the back yard. Man does the sun feel good. Wait… the sun…. Jasper… fuck. I turn and notice him over under the tree looking positively anxious. Wait, I know a hat! That will fix at least his face being covered and if he sits facing away from the sun it won’t hit his hands.

“Bella where are you going? You just got out here.” Billy as usual is trying to ruin my plans.

“I just forgot something inside. I’ll just be one second I promise..”

Running is an understatement. I was sprinting up those stairs. Digging through my closet I finally found it. Mom and I had gotten matching baseball caps when we went to the national forest one year. She ended up not keeping hers so I was going to give it to dad, but these are desperate times. Since we are all matched it won’t be weird for us to wear them.

Running down the stairs was not my best idea… I might have fallen and scraped my knee. After a band-aid I finally made it outside. I looked over to see Jasper sitting under the tree ‘drinking something’. I wonder how he got out of sitting at the table. Considering everyone else was already eating. He raised an eyebrow in my direction. I bet he was wondering where I was for a good ten minutes. Little does he know I have a brilliant plan… well at least a decent plan.

He smiles… wow it feels like a Colgate commercial. “What, you got there, pretty girl?”

Now that I’m closer I can feel the anxiety coming off him in waves. Poor Jasper… he came here for me and now he could be in big trouble. “Ummm.. I got US matching hats to wear… since it’s getting a little hot out.”

I smile big trying to be convincing. I know dad is eavesdropping. Jasper looks relieved and takes the hat from me, and swiftly puts it on. “Perfect fit.. Thank you darling. You are ready to eat. I’m actually looking forward to this.”

I smile, “Yeah I’m starved. I forgot to eat breakfast this morning.”

He shook his head, “Now don’t start any bad habits.”

“HA.ha,.ha as if. I just got busy and forgot. I got lost in the sauce… literally.”

That received a small chuckle, score! We make our way over to the table. I sit in front of dad and Billy and beside Jacob. Jasper sits in between Seth and I. Sue and Leah sit at the end of the table. Now just to get through this without dad finding out Jasper is a vampire. It would also be nice to not have any fights or disagreements between everyone, but that is not likely to come to fruition.

“So Jasper, how long have you and Bella been ‘dating’?” Really Jacob did you have to start with that!?!

Chapter 12: The Fire Within

Summary:

I took some time to rewrite this chapter because I wasn't really happy with it.

Notes:

Chapter song: Lonesome & Mad By: Under The Rug , Ariel Posen

Bella’s POV:
“So, Jasper, how long have you and Bella been ‘dating’?”
Really, Jacob? Did you have to start with that!?!
The scrape of silverware against plates filled the warm evening air as everyone was sitting around Charlie’s old wooden picnic table. While enjoying the steak he and Billy had insisted on grilling. The scent of smoke and charred meat hung thick, mixing with the cool, damp air of Forks. I had barely taken my first bite when Jacob decided to stir the pot. It’s like he wants me to die choking.
Charlie looks up, “You okay Bells?”
If death by steak is okay then yes, “Yeah I’m fine dad just got choked up… I guess I got too excited and ate too fast.” I definitely glared at Jacob when I said that.
“Well slow down sweetie I don’t want to have to pull out my safety basics training. It’s been twenty years you know.”
“We definitely don’t want that…” Jacob will have an eye shaped hole as soon as I’m done glaring at him…. If only I had laser vision. I wonder if there is a vampire with laser vision? Probably.
Jacob continued being on my shit list, “So you gonna answer my question?” He then takes a large bite of steak.
Jasper was seated beside me. He cut his steak with slow precision, seemingly unbothered by Jacob’s pointed questioning. He chewed thoughtfully before answering, his smooth Southern drawl laced with amusement. "Long enough to know you ain’t askin’ out of friendly curiosity. But if you must know, Bella and I have been spending a lot of time together, getting to know each other better since I got back in town. The official dating part was rather recent." He set his knife down carefully, his eyes steady as they met Jacob’s. "Not that it’s any of your concern, but she seems to like havin’ me around."
Jacob snorted, shaking his head. "That’s one way to put it. Funny how she never mentioned you before now. Like at all. Well, maybe when she would refer to you as being Alice's boyfriend."
Jasper smirked, picking his knife back up and slicing it into his steak with deliberate ease. "Not everything needs announcin’ or talked about. We’ve been takin’ things as they come. No need to rush into anything until we were certain. I’m sure you understand the idea of a breakup. Alice and I parted ways a while back. I don’t think there is any reason to bring it up."
Jacob scoffed, leaning back in his chair. "Is that so? Because I think it’s strange that Bella is dating her best friend's ex-boyfriend. Maybe it’s that Edwards is your brother. To me it seems like you’re just another mistake she doesn’t want to admit to yet."
Jasper’s movements stilled for just a fraction of a second before he placed his utensils down, lacing his fingers together on the table. His golden eyes locked onto Jacob’s, calm but unyielding ones. "Mighty bold of you to assume. Last I checked, she’s more than capable of making her own choices and mistakes. She doesn’t need you to make a point at the dinner table, that's for sure."
Jacob let out a sharp exhale, his fingers drumming against the table. "Yeah? Last I checked, those choices have always led to mistakes. So sue me for trying to stop a friend from ruining their life…Again."
Jasper smirked, tilting his head. "Funny that you say that since she seems to be doin’ just fine. Happier than she’s been in a long while. Or does it just bother you that it’s me?"
Jacob clenched his jaw, his grip tightening around his fork. "What bothers me is watching Bella get tangled up with someone who’s got a past like yours and pretending that it doesn’t matter."
Jasper arched a brow, his voice as smooth as ever. "Everyone’s got a past Jacob. She knows it and is fine with it. So what does that have to do with you?"
Jacob scoffed, shaking his head. "You talk a good game, but we both know people don’t change overnight."
Jasper smirked, leaning back in his chair. "Didn’t say I changed overnight, but Bella knows that. I do know how to treat a lady. Which is something you seem to be lacking in."
Jacob’s lips curled into a sneer. "Right. Because that’s what this is about? Treating her right? That's funny, considering the last guy she trusted nearly got her killed. Oh and let's not forget who that was."
Charlie, oblivious to the true weight of the conversation, frowned and set his drink down. "Alright, enough of this. We’re here to have a nice meal, not drag up drama boys."
Billy nodded in agreement. "Charlie’s right. No need to rehash things that are in the past."
Jacob, however, wasn’t finished. He leaned forward, his eyes narrowing as he pointed his fork at Jasper. "Speaking of the past, how’s Alice doing these days? Seems kinda strange how quick you moved on from her. Almost like this whole thing is just to get under her skin."
The tension around the table thickened instantly. Jasper’s smirk didn’t waver, but I could feel the shift in him—the barely perceptible tightening of his jaw, the way his fingers curled just slightly against the table. "Bringing that up again. Alice and I came to an understanding," he said smoothly. "Some things just run their course. That is how a break up works."
Jacob let out a dry laugh. "Right. And Bella just so happened to be there to pick up the pieces? How convenient."
I set my fork down, my patience officially gone. "Jacob, don’t."
He turned to me, feigning innocence. "What? I’m just wondering if you two actually like each other or if this is just one big screw-you to Alice and Edward. I mean, come on, Bella. It wouldn’t be the first time you let your feelings get messy when it comes to them."
My fingers curled into fists beneath the table, but before I could say anything, Jasper beat me to it. "Careful..." he drawled, his voice still infuriatingly calm, but now laced with something sharper. "You’re startin’ to get a little too comfortable."
Jacob let out a scoff, shaking his head as he leaned back in his chair. "Yeah? Well, so what if I am?"
Jasper chuckled, the sound low and edged with something dangerous. "That’s very interestin’, comin’ from a guy who spent years waitin’ around' for Bella to choose him."
Jacob’s eyes darkened, his jaw clenching. "At least I wasn’t some rebound to make a point to her ex."
I exhaled sharply, my frustration bubbling over. "Oh my God, Jacob, do you even hear yourself? This isn’t about Edward or Alice. This is about me and what I want. You don’t get to sit there and act like you have any right over my decisions.”
Jacob scoffed. "Right. And what exactly do you want, Bella? Cause it looks like you’re just trying to prove something. Maybe to yourself, maybe to them—hell, maybe even to me."
Jasper’s fingers tapped against the table once before he leaned forward slightly, his voice quiet but carrying a weight that made everyone still. "And what if she is, Jacob? What if she just wants somethin’ different? Somethin’ that doesn’t come with expectations or years of baggage? You think you have the right to say she can’t have that?"
Jacob’s nostrils flared, but before he could fire back, Charlie cleared his throat loudly. "Alright, that’s enough." His voice had the no-nonsense edge of a cop shutting down a bar fight before it could get ugly. "I don’t know what the hell is going on between you three, but this ain’t the place for it. We’re having dinner. So either you eat, or you take this somewhere else."
Billy gave Jacob a warning look, and Sue sighed, shaking her head. Leah muttered something under her breath that sounded a lot like "idiots," while Seth kept his head down, wisely avoiding getting involved.
Jacob stared at me for a long moment before shoving his chair back and standing. "You know what? I’ve lost my appetite." He turned on his heel and stalked off into the dark, his heavy footsteps crunching against the grass.
The table fell into an awkward silence before Charlie let out a long sigh, rubbing his temples. "I swear, this town’s gonna give me gray hair."
Trying to break the silence, “Hey seth you want the rest of Jacobs steak? No point in wasting food.”
Seths head whipped around at lighting speed, “Oh yeah dude! I wasn’t going to say anything but I’m still starved.”
I passed Seth the place so Charlie's hard work didn’t go to waste. It’s not like Jasper could eat it. Everyone had just finished eating in silence, and Jacob was nowhere to be found. I really thought he would have come back by now. I exhaled, pushing my chair back as I stood. "I’ll be right back."
Jasper’s eyes flicked to me, unreadable, but he didn’t say anything. Neither did anyone else as I turned and followed where Jacob had gone earlier.
The night air was cool against my flushed skin as I stepped onto the gravel driveway. When did it even get this late? Jacob stood by his car, arms crossed tightly over his chest, his expression hard when he turned to face me.
"What do you want, Bella?"
I folded my arms, mirroring his stance. "I want to know what the hell your problem is? I thought we talked about all this."
He let out a dry laugh, shaking his head. "My problem? You seriously don’t see it?"
"Enlighten me, then. Because from where I’m standing, all I see is you acting like a jealous idiot."
Jacob took a step closer, his eyes blazing. "You really think this is about jealousy? You think I give a damn about whatever game you and Jasper are playing?"
I clenched my fists. "It’s not a game."
"Could’ve fooled me," he shot back. "You really expect me to believe this is real? That you and Jasper just magically happened after everything? After Edward? After Alice?"
"You don’t get to decide what’s real for me, Jacob!" I snapped, my voice rising. "You don’t get to stand there and act like my feelings are some kind of joke."
Jacob scoffed. "Yeah? Well, forgive me if I don’t buy it, Bella. You’ve always been quick to fall for whatever new thrill walks into your life. First Edward, now Jasper? What’s next? You know you're just like your Mother you always complained about."
I took a step forward, my fists clenched. "You don’t know what you’re talking about."
"Don’t I?" Jacob shot back, his voice rough with frustration. "I know you, Bella. You go all in, lose yourself in whoever makes you feel special at the time. But when the dust settles, you end up hurt. Every. Single. Time."
His words hit something raw inside me, but I refused to let it show. "That’s not fair. You don’t get to say that."
"Can’t I?" Jacob shook his head. "Tell me this then—if Edward walked through that door right now and begged you to take him back, could you look him in the eye and tell him you don’t love him anymore?" He took another step closer, his expression daring me to answer.
My breath caught, and I hated that hesitation flickered through me. Jacob saw it, and it only fueled his anger. "See? You can’t even say it. And you expect me to believe you’re all-in with Jasper? That this isn’t just you trying to prove something?"
"I don’t owe you an explanation for my choices, Jacob!" I shot back. "Just because you don’t like them! It doesn’t make my feelings for him any less real!"
Jacob exhaled sharply, running a hand through his hair. "I just don’t want to watch you crash and burn again, Bella. I can’t."
"Then maybe you should stop waiting for it to happen." My voice was quieter now, but firm. "I’m not that girl anymore, Jacob. You don’t get to keep me frozen in the past. I’ve moved on and I’m better for it. In some deep part of my heart I do still love Edward… but I wouldn’t take him back after what he put me though. I may not be all-in as you like to say, but I’m happy. That has to count for something."
Jacob’s jaw tightened, his hands flexing at his sides. For a moment, it looked like he had more to say, but then the sound of slow, measured footsteps approached. We both turned to see Jasper walking toward us, his expression unreadable but his posture tense.
"Is everything alright out here?" His voice was calm, but there was something sharp beneath it.
Jacob scoffed. "Oh, look, here comes the knight in shining armor. Are you here to sweep her off her feet, or just to make sure she sticks to the plan?"
Jasper’s lips twitched, but his gaze remained steady. "Ain’t no plan. Just makin’ sure Bella doesn’t have to deal with whatever 'this is' alone."
Jacob shook his head, letting out a bitter laugh. "Right. Because you’re so good at taking care of people, aren’t you? Tell me, Jasper, how long did it take for you to forget about Alice? A week? A day? Or did you start this little act before she even left you?"
Jasper’s expression didn’t change, but I saw the way his jaw tensed, the barely perceptible shift in his stance. "Alice made her choice, and I made mine," he said evenly, but there was an edge to his voice now, something that made the air between them crackle with tension.
Jacob snorted. "Yeah? And what choice was that, exactly? To shack up with Bella just to piss her off? To prove that you could?" He turned to me now, his eyes burning. "And you, Bella? What’s your excuse? You’re really gonna stand there and tell me this isn’t some twisted way to get back at Edward for what he did?"
I felt my pulse spike, anger bubbling to the surface. "You don’t know what you’re talking about."
Jacob let out another humorless laugh, shaking his head. "Don’t I? You spent months devastated over him. You wouldn’t even let yourself breathe without thinking of him. And now, suddenly, you and Jasper are—what? Soulmates? Give me a break."
Jasper took a slow step forward, and though his expression remained composed, there was a distinct warning in his voice when he spoke. "Careful now. You’re walkin’ a fine line."
Jacob squared his shoulders. "Or what? You gonna use your tricks on me? Make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside so I stop telling the truth?"
Jasper didn’t move, but his presence alone seemed to darken the air around us. "I don’t need to use any tricks to see what’s really goin’ on here. You ain’t mad about me, Jacob. You’re mad because Bella ain’t yours. And no matter how much barkin’ you do, that ain’t ever gonna change."
Jacob’s face twisted with frustration, his hands clenched into fists at his sides. "Screw you, Jasper. You don’t know a damn thing about me or what I feel."
Jasper simply smirked, the kind of knowing, infuriating smirk that only made Jacob’s anger rise. "Don’t I? I know you’re harboring a hell of a lot of jealousy and resentment."
"Enough!" I snapped, stepping between them before this could turn into something worse. "I am so sick of this—of you two treating me like some prize in a damn pissing contest. This is my life, my choice, and if you can’t handle that, Jacob, then maybe you should just go."
Jacob stared at me, his chest rising and falling heavily, like he wanted to argue, like he wanted to say something else—but he didn’t. He exhaled sharply, running a hand through his hair before shaking his head. "Fine. Have it your way, Bella. But don’t come crying to me again when this blows up in your face.” He took a deep breath, “ Will you have dad call me when he’s ready to go?"
“Don’t worry about Billy, I'm sure the Clearwater's will get him home safe. If not I’ll have Charlie take him. He’s not going to be happy with you running off though.”
Jacob sighed while yanking open the door to his car, “Yeah whatever… He’ll get over it.” He looked away, “Thanks for taking care of him… but this will be the last you see of me for a while Bells. Is that really what you want?”
Fuck… “If that's what you want Jacob then so be it.”
“Cool cool… See you later then Bells… Just know that’ll I’ll miss the good times.. Before everything got so complicated.”
“Why are you acting like this is goodbye forever Jacob. We always makeup… It’s just a little fight. Don’t be that way.”
He shakes his head, “You’re going down a path I can’t follow, Bells. I can’t be around Bloodsuckers all the time, and I can’t stand the thought of you around them either, but… I guess that’s unfortunately your choice to make. Good Bye, for real this time, Bella.”
With that he got in his car and slammed the door shut behind him. The roar of the engine cut through the silence as he pulled out of the driveway, tires kicking up gravel as he disappeared into the night.
I stood there for a moment, my hands shaking, my breath uneven. Then, slowly, I felt the coolness of Jasper’s hand brushing against mine. "You alright, darlin’?"
I swallowed, nodding, but I couldn’t bring myself to look at him just yet. "Yeah. Just... tired."
Jasper exhaled through his nose, nodding once. "C’mon. Let’s get you inside."
And with that, he gently placed a hand on the small of my back, guiding me away from the empty driveway and back toward the house—where more trouble was bound to be waiting.