Chapter Text
“Detective! You need a holiday!” - Chloe Jane Decker looked up and scanned Lucifer’s tanned and ruggedly handsome face for any signs of joking. She was sitting at her desk searching for a phone number in her files. After a short outward breath, she turned to Lucifer with her left eyebrow raised, “Is that so, huh? And who is going to sort out all the leftover jobs from the Markwell-case?”.
Absentmindedly, she started to rummage in her drawer and said more to herself, “Where did I put this d… devilled number? I should really call the vic’s family to let them know that the crime scene has been cleared and all items there can be collected, asap!”.
Lucifer studied her thoughtfully and then held up a little business card for her, “Looking for that?”. - Chloe raised her head from bending over her drawer, “How did you even …? You know, never mind! Give me that!”. Abruptly, the detective snatched the card with the relative’s number out of Lucifer’s hand. He just grinned and said, “Well, you DID call it a devilled card, so I had to make sure it earned its name!”.
“Haha! Very funny! Now, will you just let me do my work?! Pester Dan or Carol or someone else whilst I finish here!”, Chloe said with rising irritation. - “Fine!”, Lucifer said rather too smugly for Chloe’s liking. He got up and headed straight for the Lieutenant’s office. When he went in, he couldn’t help but turning around once and giving Chloe his widest Cheshire Cat grin before closing the superior’s door behind him. Chloe sighed. It was going to be a long day!
She quickly forgot her irritation with Lucifer’s antics and lost herself in the paperwork. As a result, Chloe did not even notice Lucifer re-emerging from Lieutenant Watkin’s office rubbing his hands. He slipped into Miss Lopez’ office in the hope that Chloe would not pay him too much heed if he made one of his typically flamboyant exits from there later on.
When 4 o’clock approached, Chloe’s phone rang. She picked up the landline phone and looked increasingly mystified. The detective frowned, “Excuse me if I stop you there but I am sure that you have the wrong number. This is the LAPD here, not another branch of the MET! In the interest of confidentiality, I shall put the phone down, now, but … good luck with your … ”, Chloe lightly coughed at this point, “ghost hunt!”.
Just when she said the last part, Dan was walking by and looked at her quizzically, “What was that about?”. - Chloe shrugged, “I can’t decide. It was either a hoax or New Scotland Yard got their internal phone connections muddled up. They were saying they are trying to get to the bottom of a haunted house killing in London.” - While Chloe just seemed confused, Dan feebly joked, “Huh, if they got a ghost killing, maybe they could get a ghost Sherlock Holmes to investigate?”.
At this point, Lucifer walked past and overheard the last snippet of the conversation, “Daniel, what are you on about? Sherlock Holmes is a fictional character, so never existed ergo can’t come back as a ghost. In fact, they say that Iggy - you both know him as Sir Arthur Conan Doyle - modelled this character on his university lecturer Joseph Bell but that is only partly true. Where do you think Holme’s excessive use of opiates when bored came from? Nice chap, Iggy! He was also not exactly blessed with an easy father. Oh, and you of all people, Daniel, shouldn’t make jokes about returning as a ghost after your stint down under.”
Daniel’s jaw dropped open while Chloe just stared in disbelief at Lucifer, “Shall we, Detective?”, the aforementioned asked in a cheerful tone.
When Lucifer steered the Corvette through L.A.’s Thursday afternoon traffic, Chloe’s curiosity got the better of her. Casually, she stated, “So, you knew Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.” - Lucifer briefly cast her a side-glance, “Oh, of course, your favourite teenage read! I almost forgot! The urchin and I never finished our tribute video for your birthday after the whole kidnapping thing. Well, maybe we can go to the U.K. together and visit the original setting of it instead? It’s only a week and a bit till your birthday after all.”
“Lucifer, I heard you earlier. I don’t have time for a holiday right now! I have only just returned to work after helping with the latest celestial crises. We can’t take another week off so soon again.”, Chloe said exasperated. - “Well, detective, I am a great believer in combining duty and pleasure. But back to your other question: I met Iggy in a rather drunken state at a tavern in Vienna. He was ranting about his father whose battle with alcoholism was no mean feat for the rest of the family to deal with. We bonded over a drink and our father issues. A bright talent: not many people are a scientist and a man of letters at the same time.”
Semi-irritated, Chloe asked, “And you call him Iggy why, exactly?”. - Lucifer shrugged his shoulders, “His middle name was Ignatius. I thought then that Iggy made him sound less … ardent and more down with his reading customers. It’s a pet name like when I call you ‘Detective’! … I liked the fellow. He was ‘sick’ as your little parasite would say and he didn’t even realise. Such a modest bloke! He fully deserved ending up in heaven.”
- - - - - - - - - - - -
The next day, Chloe and Lucifer arrived early in work - far too early for Lucifer’s taste. He had wanted to have his wicked way with Chloe at least another time but the detective was adamant that she wanted to lay that, in Lucifer’s words, ´hideously boring’ Markwell-case to rest. As soon as they walked into the bullpen, Chloe heard the commanding voice of Lieutenant Watkins echo across the open-plan office space, “Detective Decker, a word please!”. Chloe looked with surprise into the direction of her boss’s office and acknowledged, “On my way, Lieutenant!”.
Lucifer suddenly took a great interest in her new sempervivum desk plant. The devil had gifted her this on Tuesday with the words, “It means ‘always living’. Here is to hoping it can take a bit of neglect!”. Chloe had snorted and said, “Never mind neglect, can it take the occasional feed of alcohol by a certain devil?”. - Lucifer had grinned and said, “Ariel already told me off for this a few weeks ago. She truly educated me in all things office plant!”.
To further divert attention, he brushed the top of the rather fleshy-leaved plant and said, not too quietly, “Detective! I bet you now wish you had taken me up on my offer relating to one of your flowers this morning rather than going to work early.” - If looks could kill, Lucifer would have fallen right through the crust of the earth and back down into hell the express way. Chloe punched him hard on the upper arm hissing, “Remember: No-pillow-talk-in-work!”, pronouncing each syllable with menace. Lucifer put his hands up in defeat and stated with a wide grin, “Fine, I shall go and talk to Miss Lopez while you have your important meeting.”
- - - - - - - - - - - -
“Miss Lopez, how are things in the world of isopropanol?”, Lucifer asked on entering Miss Lopez’s lab and office space. - Ella looked up at him through her lab goggles with one raised eye-brow first but then grinned with a wide smile, “Good morning, Lucifer!”. She briefly looked through her glass window and asked, “No Chloe today?”. Lucifer said noncommittally, “In with the Lieutenant right now.”. Ella hummed understanding.
“So, Miss Lopez, how is it going with Carol then?”. - Ella looked up sharply and then sighed, “Well, to be honest, since the whole frog-rain episode and the accidental reveal to him, nothing has been going anywhere. I think he is afraid of either me or my friends.” - Lucifer nodded thoughtfully and then quickly tried to hide the painful implications to him.
As always, he tried to make light of the situation to brush over any hurt fast, “Well, he did witness you tell off the devil himself. I think that would make you officially one of THE bravest, most unafraid and therefore scariest women in the universe. Not that you have the monopoly on devil-telling-off! The official record for these is still held by the detective.”
Ella was still giggling about Lucifer’s remark when, right on cue, a furious Chloe stomped into the lab. Lucifer winked at Miss Lopez saying, “See, what did I just tell you?”. Ella laughed even louder but swallowed the rest of her outburst when she saw Chloe’s furious gaze.
Addressed to Lucifer, Chloe said, “How did you do it? No, no! Don’t tell me! You had a person in London owe you a favour, no doubt. Is this how I just got ordered to pack my bags and leave on the first flight from Los Angeles Airport to Heathrow on Saturday morning? I told you that I can’t go on a holiday right now!”.
Lucifer grinned, “You guessed right on the favour but I DID listen to you! We are not going there on holiday. It’s for work! LAPD’s finest will assist the MET on a tricky case. If we are fast, we can solve whatever bothers them within a week or so and then add on a birthday weekend for you before heading home. There we go! Problem solved.”
“You are going to London? Can I come, too?”, Ella exclaimed full of excitement. Chloe sighed, “Sorry, Ella. It will cost them already an arm and a leg to fly me out there. I assume, they have their own forensics lab and team but it might be useful to have you on standby here with access to our database if ok with you?”. - “Aww, I always wanted to see that ridiculous suit of armour of King Henry VIII in the Tower of London but fine!”, Ella sighed in disappointment.
Lucifer raised an eyebrow, “I assume you mean the one which is the Reformation version of a budgie smuggler? Indeed, a sight to behold! Needless to say, he ended up in hell. Trust me, he doesn’t measure up to all this artistic make-belief in reality!”. - Ella’s yaw dropped while Chloe was still eyeing him furiously. Feeling manipulated was not exclusively Lucifer’s domain anymore - latest since her ‘gift-revelation’ anyway.
Chloe sighed, “You know, you are very used to getting your way. Just …, whatever! I need to go home and pack as I now have a child to sort out and an early flight to catch thanks to you!” and with that she stalked out of the lab. Ella just looked a little helplessly at Lucifer saying, “Good luck getting out of that doghouse, buddy!”. - Lucifer shouted, “But Detective! I only meant well!”, and hurried after Chloe. Ella rolled her eyes and muttered, “These two - unbelievable!”, before she went back to work.