Chapter Text
Oguma didn’t even mention Louis’ new attire and horns. Louis wondered if he even noticed. His father had taken very little interest in his transition, never joining him at an appointment.
‘Louis? Are you bringing anyone with you? We like to include parents in this process so they understand what will happen too,’ the receptionist asked.
‘Just me.’
‘Ok well along the corridor, door 3.’ She smiled at the awkward red deer standing behind the desk. He wore a thick designer jumper that was a few sizes too big and pants that were rolled up a few times.
‘Poor kid,’ the receptionist muttered as he left.
Louis stood in front of the door; he couldn’t bring his hand up to knock. Worries rushed through his head. Would the psychologist take him seriously? Believe him even?
He had rummaged through the depths of his wardrobe this morning, discarding anything remotely feminine. Even the jeans he had seemed to accentuate his waist in an uncomfortable way. Rex, this was impossible. Louis had a slender frame but still how small his waist had bugged him.
Eventually, he settled on an old, too-big jumper a relative had sent him for a birthday. Now the more problematic part. He snuck into his father’s room and looked through some clothes that had been packed away. He smirked at the flamboyant colours of the 60s in the disposed clothes. The last thing he wanted was to stand out. He did keep one of the shoulder tops though, maybe later on he would wear it.
For now, it seemed all hope was lost until an out-of-place basic jeans appeared at the bottom. Louis couldn’t imagine Oguma ever wearing jeans so he guessed he wouldn’t miss the pair. They were long and wide but completely engulfed his figure which he liked.
Now standing outside the door, Louis wondered if his efforts had even made a difference, he looked so feminine… the delicate contours of his face, his large eyes and lack of horns. He envied how rugged and masculine carnivores looked an-
His thoughts were interrupted by the door opening and a friendly-faced okapi appearing.
‘Louis come in! Would you like a drink?’
‘Yes, erm a juice?’ he stumbled over the words. His mouth seemed so dry.
The juice was bitter but refreshing, kiwi maybe.
‘So, I hear you are having some struggles with your gender?’ prompted the okapi.
Louis sat silently, staring at his shoes, where could he even start?
‘Okay… I’m Durham and I am a trans man.’
The rest of the visit went well. Durham asked about Louis’ mood and emotions. One thing Oguma had insisted on was psychological visits since at first he was convinced this was some sort of rebellion and not to make any rash decisions.
Louis explained his anxiety and stress. He felt nervous sometimes for no reason and zoned out a lot during conversations. He hyper-focused on routines such as washing his hands and praying to Rex repetitively. This concerned Durham a bit and he recommended a few sessions of CBT.
‘These compulsions… could be because of your childhood. It would be best to work through this first before any transition.’
Louis ached hearing this. He knew it was for the best, or perhaps what Oguma wanted.
‘However, if you feel ready you can experiment with temporary things such as clothes.’
‘I want antlers.’
It came out of nowhere, but it was true.
‘You’re quite young…’ reassured Durham, ‘plenty of boys your age don’t have antlers.’
The disappointed look on Louis face made the okapi sigh in sympathy, ‘but I’ll write it down.’
Instantly, a glow lit up the deer’s face, perhaps for the first time in the whole meeting.
‘Okay I’ll see you next week, Louis,’ the okapi waved him out and Louis waved back walking along the corridor, just about to turn around… His body was impaled into a thick, impenetrable wall of fluff.
‘Ah! Louis! I’m so sorry.’
Crap.
Looking up, a grey wolf was apologising profusely, waving his hands in a distracting manner. How did he know his name? To make matters worse, this definitely looked like Legosi, a lighting crew member of the drama club.
Why was he here?
‘Legosi, was it?’
‘Y-yes! I am part of the drama club like you!’
‘Yes I know that,’ Louis tried to make his tone pleasant but the enthusiasm of canines was irritating.