Payback pt.1 : Bad Blood (Cheating!LevixReader)

by HardcoreBardcore

Summary:

Hello! Here is my first ever story. I hope you'll like! I wanted to focus on the fact that you and Levi are similar, and you're strong, by any standard. I was kinda getting tired of the naive, fluffy and soft reader, even though I still like it, we needed more badasses around I think!

Notes:

Listen to this while reading [x]

 

AN : Hieeeee! DeB here! So, here is my first story in english EVER. My mother's tongue is french so excuse me if some sentences seem weird or words are mispelled. As you can see it is only a part one. Some slight questions are to be answered in part two. Maybe there'll even be a part three! Oh and sorry for the long-ass read! 

 

"[ First Name], the boss wants to see you in his office. Now." said Connie, one of your colleagues, peering from the entrance of your own office.

He harbored that expression of a dog who'd just been yelled at. Without a doubt, the boss was pissed, enough to scare off Connie. You grinned and stood up from your seat, the young bald man looking at you, confused by your expression. Being called like that by the Chief of Staff, Erwin, was not a good thing. Far from it. But it was fine. You already knew what was to come. Of course you did, it was your design after all. You'd be coming to a head, today. Walking in the hallways, you held your head up high, completely unphased.

You  finally passed Chrysta, the personal assistant of Erwin and gave a gave a slight nod towards her, still grinning. She replied by doing the same gesture, but her eyes gleamed with just as much confusion as Connie before when she saw your confidence. Not giving anything even similar to an indication as of what was going on in your mind to the blonde, you knocked on the grey-painted wooden door three times, and waited.

"Enter." he declared, his voice strangely... cold.

Yup, it was definitely the time.

You entered without a word and closed the door after he indicated a seat to you. You then sat, your back straight, not even touching the seat of the comfortable chair. Erwin observed your face, a stern look in his eyes, almost resembling the one's Levi could pull off, but with a flame hidden deep. He was way worse than pissed off, he was angry.
Boy wasn't he done with that flame, if only he knew.

"What is it, sir?" you finally asked after a long, heavy silence, in which, despite all odds, you took pleasure, all the while whipping back some of your [h/c] tresses.
"Special Agent [Last Name], this is important matter, refrain from such laidback behavior."

Using your last name hadn't been an habit for the Chief of Staff in a long time, but he had to remind you that being friends with the boss didn't grant you any favors. And when he was talking about laidback behaviour, he wasn't talking about your words or even your posture, those two things being perfectly professional. It was all in your eyes and your tone. He didn't like your attitude one bit right now, not only feeling disrespect in it, but also feeling quite well it wasn't you. Well, your normal you. He knew you well after all, you were a precious colleague, a good friend and the wife of who he considered to as something akin to a brother. Something was going on, and he wanted answers. And he'd get 'em, no worries about that.

"Sorry, chief-"
"It's okay. Now, let's get on with the real subject here." Erwin interrupted, his tone softening a little. "Let's not beat around the bush. Levi didn't came to work in the last two days, do you know why?"
"Not in the slightest." you lied, without even flinching, even though you already knew this answer would never work in a hundred years.
"Don't play dumb with me, [First Name].  I found him yesterday, he's beat up and one of his eyes is still swollen shut." He hissed, glaring at you.

For once, you gulped. You didn't lost your composure, but still, Erwin wasn't called chief for nothing : he had a way to look at his subordinates that made them go by his words, whatever they were. Good thing you didn't really plan on lying anyway. You were just playing around. For now.

Readjusting your [f/c] blouse, your eyes fixed those of your boss. [e/c] against icy blue. Normally, what was to come for the both of you, the words that were about to be exchanged would break you, but not this time, something had devoured that consideration in a single bite. Sighing, you finally let your back rest on the seat behind and supported your head with your fist, elbow pinning the armrest.

"With all due respect boss, it's you who's playing dumb. Levi's my husband, of course I know where and in what state he is, no need to be Sherlock Holmes to deduce that one. Why do you ask me that?" Your voice resounded with a simple tone, detached from the situation, just like your whole expression.
"Because he didn't want to tell me a thing and I am pretty sure that to take down Levi in that way, it had to be someone he didn't expect it at all from. That someone is you, [First Name], that I am assured of, No need to be Sherlock Holmes to guess that either." He smirked slightly, he had just used your own arrogance against you, tch."I'd really appreciate not to have to hand to the internal affairs a report for conflict of interests between two of my best Agents, so you'd be best advised to not leave a single, detail, out."

Oh god, there was no going back now. That was it : the final moment. Your time to get back at everybody, setting things right and getting the truth out there. You had all the right cards in your hand and were ready to put them on the table and send the final blow to the other players. Your tongue clucked on your palate as a reflex, it was victory, but it still made you nervous.

"I hope you got time chief, you're in for one hell of a story." you laughed lightly, your eyes gleaming with an almost scary absence of any emotions.
"Don't worry about my time, worry about not forgetting anything, [First Name]." He snapped, serious.

Weeks. It's been weeks since you last felt the bliss and wellness this relationship had been giving you for the past couple years. You sat there, in your living room, looking at those fucking paintings you two had bought together. Some you still liked - your love for impressionism would survive anything, even a Van Goghesque apocalypse - and other you now despised. Most of them, actually. They reminded you of a time where you both were a team, a couple sharing an unding bond, together through everything in this twisted, tortuous, yet irreplaceable and delightful osmosis.  You had known him for seven years, and spent three with him, as a Us rather than an I, especially after you did the unthinkable. About a year and a half in the relationship, you, [First + Last Name], married. You even accepted his proposal with tears of joy. The girl who had once swore she'd never tie herself up with one of those fucking rings in this shitty damned world had fallen for those steel gray eyes. You had fawned, rejoiced and kissed that man who had just knotted a nice rope for you.

Oh, the regrets. They overflowed, filled you to the brim and drowned you, now. You've been weak, [First Name]. So fucking weak. You took another sip of whiskey, thinking about all those memories. The engulfing passions, the thrills, missions you took head-on together, the tender moments, this feeling of coming home each time you embraced him, all these words and secrets you shared to each other that the rest of the world didn't know about. He had found his place in the only soft spot of your soul, and made you give in with unbelievable ease. His love slowly changed you. You became sweet with him, soft, almost the... typical girl. Almost. Love overpowered you, and you became its slave.

Tonight was different though. You had just cut the chains. You had cut many thing, in fact. In his office, mainly. He had some knives that were precious to him, like, apple-of-his-eyes precious. They were protected by a glass case, if that shows any more how he cared for those. Well, their blades were now bent or simply cut, all thanks to the bolt cutters lying down on the floor next to you, shining from the sole source of light in the elegant room : the moonlight. You didn't felt like having any synthetic light source piercing your eyes, no, you wanted your pain and your wet puffy eyes to stay in the comfort and secrecy of the darkness. You heard the clock strike eleven times. He would arrive soon. 

The knives had been the last targets, after his pieces of art, his desk and even this god-forsaken violin that he adored and played like only the god of music he was could. Those, and the utter cleanliness of his office, were all things he held as treasures. Destroying them was a way to take from him, just like he'd took from you. Except he took everything and you had the decency to refrain yourself. But let's not digress here. As you thought before, you went for the blades last, because of a precise and well thought-out plan. The glass case was set with an alarm. Wherever he was, he'd receive the alert and you knew it. Sure thing you knew it, you freaking installed the thing together one day.

At least that would be enough to bring him back before birds would start their innocent and melodious chirps as the sun would start peeking out from the horizon, for once. What the hell did he fucking thought? That you, a spy, a senior special agent - only one rank below Levi, who was a Chief special agent - would be oblivious to his strange acts? The ungodly hours he came back home, the times he even didn't and you'd only see him again at work, supposedly at an unknown hideout for a mission - like you didn't know every fucking hideout he had - those days he was out "with Erwin" or "With Petra" but didn't answer any texts you'd send him? His neatfreakness increased tenfold towards his personal hygiene? Did your utter twat of a husband really thought he had bested you? You clucked your tongue. Relax [First name], wait and see.

It didn't take more than five minutes until you heard the distinct clicking the lock of the front door did echoing through the silence of the house. You finished your whiskey in one gulp and  put the glass on the pedestal stand right next to the armchair you were comfortably weeping on.
Time seemed to slow down a notch. For a mere instant, you wanted to call off everything, go back to your ignorant state, to stop sensing this betrayal under your skin each time you took a breath. You loved him, so much, like you'd never loved anyone before. He was your everything and even though you had prepared this scene - you were kind of the dramatic type sometimes, yes - you didn't know shit about what to say, or ask. How do you explain a heartbreak? How do you discuss treason on the most personal level? How do you stand in front of the man that had you around his finger with a simple look and put an end to it? No, stop [First Name], you had to remember. He fucked her. That slut. He had an affair with a woman you thought was out of any suspicion. You fucking adored that girl! She was witty, fun to talk to, she had many qualities and in many ways, you admired her way to be so expressive, you, the girl who could kill the enemy without flinching yet jumped each time you'd hear your own laugh - you didn't laughed this little, but you rarely laughed loudly, to put it that way.

You remembered the texts. The lustful texts, even erotic at times. You remembered the "You left me barely walking yesterday baby!   " she had sent, and the "Then you should maybe prepare a wheelchair for tonight." he had answered. If it wasn't for the discretion you wished to preserve, you would've surely roared in pain at the mere reminiscence of those words right this instant. Instead, you wept silently, all the while you heard him run towards his office.

"WHAT THE FUCK?" he screamed, something usually so uncharacteristic. "SHIT, SHIT SHIT SHIT. NO! FUCK!!"

He was roaring, his voice breaking from the horror of his little treasures destroyed and you laughed quietly. You put your [s/c] hand on your mouth to keep yourself from laughing and wiped your tears. It was so weird, how you felt... satisfied, by his anger. Revenge was a dish best savoured cold and frankly, to you right now, it tasted like no bowl of [flavor] ice cream would've ever tasted.

You swiftly got up, walked quietly despite your [color] heels, thanks to the rug under your feet. You grabbed the bolt cutters and looked at the French-doors that were leading to the backyard, barely five meters away from you.  It was clear Levi would throw a rage fit in his office for a while, but you'd have none of it. He was going to come right where you wanted him to be and you wouldn't freaking wait for that asshole. You threw the tool with all your strength at the fragile doors. Glass shattered from the multiple small window panes and the lock gave in, opening the doors violently. The noise could've awoke a dead man... but instead it drawn out one who'd soon enough wish he was.

Your heard loud footsteps in the stairs, Levi was running. You waited, standing as proudly as ever, the weak tears that kept coming despite your best efforts to wipe them away hidden in the night. He was infuriated but had stopped screaming. He was probably hoping to catch some vandal and was so focused on it he had no place in his mind to scream insults. Of course he was like that, you were too.  You both were professional in those situations. In a lot of situations, in fact. When he finally entered the living room, you smiled.

Your smile quickly faded  though. Levi didn't took the time to recognize the form, recognize you. Of course he wouldn't, he thought someone had just broke in, destroyed his most precious possessions and he had , against all odds, the chance to capture the vandal. The only logical thing would've been to take the opportunity and needless to say, Levi was very logical. He lunged at you like a lion would do to an antelope, making you lose your balance and fall on the floor. You tried to pry his hands off so you could breathe, while he was on top of you, but there was no stopping him, his strength surpassed many, including yours. His breathing was so calm, composed, you knew it meant he was beyond furious. One of his hands stopped grasping your flesh and raised up, now forming a fist, ready to batter your head with his bare  hands. That's when you snapped out of your shock.

"L-Levi...!" you uttered in a raspy voice, gasping for air.

His whole body stopped moving. He finally recognized your beautiful [s/c] skin now reddened by the lack of oxygen, your plump [l/c] lips, your [e/c], filled with tears, fear and anger... He stood there, unable to register and in your panic, you acted. You planted your fist with force into his stomach, and he lost his breath, looking shocked like he rarely looked. You took this opportunity to reverse the situation and be the one on top. You took  his hands and pinned them down on each of his sides. You were now crying a river, sobbing, ashamed, but sobbing nonetheless. Your head was down, but half masked by [h/l] [h/c] locks. The fact your encounter had suddenly became violent and that his whole body still emanated her perfume made you tremble against your will, from desperation, anger. Betrayal.

"[F-First Name], I-" he started. But you stopped him, screaming like a fucking banshee.
"YOU FUCKED HER. YOU TOOK ME, MY WHOLE BEING, YOU EVEN FUCKING TIED ME UP WITH A WEDDING AND YOU STILL FUCKED THAT VAPID SLUT?"

That's when you snapped, when you started punching is face. Time radically slowed down, seconds seemed to be hours now. Your mind was so blurred it didn't even register the absence of any opposition.

"WHY-" one punch on his jaw. "DID YOU-" another punch, hitting his left cheek, surely rupturing the flesh inside his mouth. "HAVE TO-" your fist hit right on his lower lip, blood started to ooze profusely. "DO THIS-" how many time did you hit him? You couldn't remember anymore. "TO ME!!"

As you screamed the last words, your voice broke, you bawled, against your will, losing the strength of violence while a pit of despair formed in your stomach. You snapped out of this fiery state and saw : he barely fought back. Then you stopped moving at all, horrified, petrified. A roaring monster inside that hole in your stomach was obtaining satisfaction, but you, the woman who loved him, you had just... beat him up. He was hurt, coughing and slightly wheezing, his face bloodied, just like your hands, you felt panicked and sad at this sight. Yet, the monster kept whispering how maybe Levi wouldn't feel the treason you had suffered, but he would feel his fuck-ass face for days. He coughed some blood and from the eye that was still open, he looked at you. His beautiful steel grey eyes, usually so calm and stoical, were now filled with a latent sadness and... guilt. You wiped off the blood coming out from the corner of his mouth and got off him, almost tumbling, ridden with a mix of all of those opposite feelings. You then said with a voice all too calm to hide how bad and confused you felt :

"You can call the police, I won't stop you."
After all, this had just went too far. You acted like a beast, lost your precious control. You started to feel disgust towards yourself, where you should've felt this only for him. Getting back up on your feet, you saw him shake his head.
"I... won't..." he coughed again. For a moment you could've sworn he was about to say something else, but closed his mouth, just lying there.
"Fine, I would've deserved it though." Your voice was so assured, filled with an ice-cold tone, yet you still wept. You couldn't stop, you were almost scared your tear ducts would never stop.
"You'll receive the divorce papers soon." You stated. This time, your voice had darkened,  it was hurt. You helped Levi get on his feet and sat him in the armchair. "I can't believe it ends like this..."
"I'm..." he spat blood on his mouth. "so sorry..."
"I am too. Really." Your voice now shaked, you were sorry for this ruined marriage as much as for your inacceptable behavior.

You got out of the living room, for a moment only, but Levi thought you'd left for good. He started crying, making barely any noise, not being the man to express his feeling too phsically. His face hurt, his body ached and his heart broke under the weight of guilt and loss. Emotions swirled in him violently, like he had never let them before. He just knew, he'd just lost everything. His beautiful, kind, loving and strong wife, his life, himself. He had been many things in his life, a lot related to the department of assholery, but never had he thought he'd ever do this. Why did he fucking cheat on you? He had never ceased to love you, never a single moment had he been unsatisfied, but he had still... fucked it all up. Levi searched, any hint, anything that could've made him act so stupidly, and when he understood, he barely retained a roar of fury. Thinking about the now clear why was unbearable. He deserved all this. All. He deserved to lose what he'd just lost. And was gonna lose so much more soon...  Levi passed a hand through his raven colored tresses. He was pathetic. A monstrous, pathetic beast, driven by his lowest instincts and stupidest reasons. In the end, the physical pain was welcome, as it permitted him to focus on something else, as to not just lose total control of his already irregular breath.

Levi turned his head towards the entrance of the living room, bewildered, when he heard you come back, hands occupied by a first aid kit. You put it on the same stand where your emptied whiskey glass rested and looked at him, almost compassionate. You were both fighters, you knew how much he could've hurt you back, and you knew just how much you'd had beaten the shit out of him just moments ago. And most of all, he was Ackerman, patching himself up while being so distraught wasn't his forte. You knew he could've just let everything like that, not caring about infections, or healing right now. After seven years knowing him, there's never been a single of these - even though rare- instances where you didn't have to take care of him.

Staying was pointless, hurtful. You had many questions and feelings swirling, just as violently as those of Levi, unbeknownst to you. Both of you had to make tremendous effort to show your deepest emotions to the other in normal times, right now it would've been impossible. Plus, there was nothing to say. Nothing about his cheating, nothing about your outburst, nothing at all. You were simply... scared. Shitless. Maybe you needed  answers, but who cares, you just didn't want to hear it.

Yet, you opened the lamp on the stand and crouched in front of him, his eye widened, while the other had already started swelling and was kept shut. Not only you hadn't just vanished, but now you could both witness the miserable state in which each other was. His grey irises were just as reddened by the salty water that flowed as your [e/c] orbs. His face was battered, under the gore you could barely recognize him. He looked down and saw you had rinsed your hands, showing your swollen and scratched knuckles. And when he looked back up, his chest tightened, never in his life had the black haired man saw you with such a melancholic air. Without a word you went for the kit and opened it, first getting the alcohol and water to clean his face.

"W-why..." he muttered, not caring at all about the iron savor in his mouth you had forced him to taste with your punches.
"Shut up and let me help you. No questions." You settled, not leaving any place to argue.
"[First Name]... I'm..." he started, ignoring your harsh voice.
"You don't get to tell me a damn thing, Levi. I'm helping you, then I am leaving. You can keep the house." You glared at him, there was really no place for discussion here.

He started to raise his hand in what you understood to be a attempt to stop you from helping him, but he receded, thankfully. Something in you really wanted to take care of him one last time, and he saw it the moment he let you focus on healing him. You wanted to touch his face, his lips, to have a last memory of this chiseled jaw. No way in hell you could've let this relationship end in total violence. So you did what you could with what you had, your husband even feeling sometimes a faint caress stole around another movement, but didn't knew if he could really trust his sensations, as his whole face seemed to pulse anyway.

You finished and for a moment, paused, looking at him. None of you had spoke again and the silence, at first kind of comforting, now started to weigh on both your shoulders. His wounds made you feel remorse, his slightly parted mouth as he seemed at loss for words made you want to kiss him, but looking in his eyes- his soul, you felt the hole his betrayal had created in you widen. Your eyes filled up with tears once again and you bit he interior of your cheek to keep from crying in plain sight. Your soon-to-be ex raised his hand once again, but this time he cupped your cheek and his thumb wiped away a tear. His voice resounded for the first time in what seemed to have been hours, awfully tender and soft, just like those singular occasions you had ended up crying in his strong arms, curled up in a fetal position.

"I'll never forgive myself." You saw how hard it was for him to talk with the bruises that started to appear along his jaw line, but also with the bundle of cries he held tight in his throat. "I love you, [First Name]... so fucking much..."
"Goodbye, Levi." you breathed, standing up.

The terrible, yet inviting warmth of his hand stained your face, even when his touch stopped as you stood back up. It was disgusting, how you still felt the leash of love near you, waiting for its moment to grasp your neck once again and choke you, and even more disgusting, how you almost wished it did catch you. You hated him now, there was no denying that. But you hated him from too much love and trust and that left a mark, right on your heart.

Without another word you turned around and left. This place you once called home, this man you once called yours and this ring that once meant you were tied together. The distinctive clank the white gold and diamond made on the asphalt in from of the house sealed your faith. You were now a deceived wife, exactly like you'd feared in all your years of trust issues. You went to your [color] car and took place on the driver's seat. Now away from the sight of your- this man, something dwelled up again. The monster. Raging, screeching, rambling about how you had been a betrayed wife, but you wouldn't stand as a betrayed woman without setting things right.

In the blink of an eye, you started your car, tires screeching and went to an hotel, the bags you had prepared before this ordeal happened sitting on the backseat. Your mind boiled, you now had a plan and counted on it to make them all pay.

Erwin watched you tell your story as you wore a look of dignity that refused to die plastered on your face, but a mist clouding your eyes nonetheless. The blond man couldn't believe it. When he'd went to see his friend, Levi had refused to answer any of his questions. The home had been cleaner than ever, but not him. He reeked of alcohol and cigarettes, his chin and jaw covered in stubble and bruises and didn't even took care of dressing properly, looking like the illegitimate child of a homeless and a maid. His best agent never even dared to look at him in the eye and after ten minutes of "nothing" and "It's none of your goddamn business", the heavy-browed blond took his leave, angered by the only things he'd learned that day. Levi's wife had left him, and he'd been beaten the hell up.

"So, this is it. You know everything, every detail, from the color of those stupid bolt cutters to the fucking texts that proved his cheating." You told flatly, like someone who just recounted a bad week-end in Vegas.
"[First Name], I don't know what to say..." he started, trying to clarify the boundaries between friend and nosy bitch.
"Oh, well, sorry, I forgot one thing. I know you covered him up." Your voice was monotone at best, but your eyes gleamed with anger for an instant.
"W-what? [F-First Name], I didn't want to- I mean, Levi he- just spiraled into- and-" he stated, shocked.
"No, don't worry." You interrupted abruptly, not wishing to hear excuses from Levi's friend. "He's your best friend and I'm only the little cliché wife, after all. What could you do!" A laugh deprived of any amusement escaped your lips. "I have a question though?" 

Erwin looked at you. He owed you at least asnwers. In fact he had covered up for Levi in the silly hope his ebony haired friend would confess himself his drunken escapades, but he never did and now here he was, in the middle of what wasn't his business. Or maybe it was, despite all the good actions he could've done.

"Yes?" Erwin said, in a small voice.
"Why did you cover up for your wife too?"
"W-what?" the boss frowned, he didn't understand what you meant.
"Ho, did I left that minor detail out too? I'm so sorry, you'll understand with such a heavy story, things like that were bound to happen!" Again another laugh, this time light, you were finally taking pleasure. What was due to you. "The bitch barely walking I talked about? It was Hanji, your wife."

You felt it, the first crash in his beautiful glass castle of butterflies and happiness with the witch who disguised herself as a crazy-on-the-borders princess.

"Y-you, it can't be, there must be a mistake, it must be anoth-"
"Erwin, do you forget I am a senior Agent here? I checked the number associated to the contact name. It was your wife who sent that. You're just as low as me in the ranks of spouses, now."

No, he was lower in fact. Hanji was a girl he'd met, working here too, but in the intel department, so let's say some kind of a sister department. She was cute, funny, crazy and totally turning his world upside down, he loved that. They'd met about two years ago and finally married four months ago. She didn't even wait for the earth to make a whole turn around the sun after her wedding before shattering their worlds.

"You're lying!" He roared, unable to cope with reality.
"You know I'm not!" you answered, springing up just like he did seconds ago. "I wanted my revenge on you fuckers, but not to the point of fucking lying. Go ask Levi, I'm pretty sure he'll tell you now that he's cornered."

Erwin stared blankly at you, somewhat not even seeing you were still here. He was lost, so lost. Destroyed even. He had, just like you, lost a friend and a spouse, but in his case it was his new spouse and best friend. Talk about trust issues incoming.

"Well, my job's done here, I guess." you stated. "I got back at you by telling doing what you should've done with me weeks ago, my husband's ways are uncovered for good... I guess we could say we're all even now. Well, I'd need to fuck Hanji's husband to be truly even, but..." you looked at his defeated and suffering expression. "I guess calling her out is enough!"

He stood there, silent, watching you as you relished this moment with a sombre happiness. It wasn't you, to take pleasure in the fall of others. But it wasn't you to love, to let place in your life for treason, and see what had happened. Erwin finally snapped out of it and in violent gestures, started walking past you to his office door. He opened it and said with a harsh tone to Chrysta, all while getting his coat and keys.

" If anyone calls, I am unavailable due to important business, clear?"
"Y-yes sir!" answered Chrysta in her always so sweet voice.

With that, the Chief glared at you, and indicated the office entrance with a movement of the head, meaning : get the hell out of here. As you did, you felt him behind you, then next to you and soon enough you saw his back as his half-jogged out. How satisfactory it was, to feel Hanji's world was about to be shattered, that she would lose her beautiful blond prince on his white horse. May he dump her in a fucking mud puddle. And Levi? Levi, he'd lose his best friend, just like he'd lost you. Somehow, you couldn't feel complete content towards it. You still loved Levi, and imagining his sorrow crushed you in some way, even if it was of his own making.

Tssk. You had to stop that. You were now a free woman, you had avenged your honor, all had been settled righteously, now. You were the one who had been played all along.You were the one they had all lied to. They all deserved it. If anything, you should've been proud. And now you were all in this bright and new category of horrible people together.ou were all in this bright and new category of horrible people together.